


Music Never Sleeps

by SkylarMarie90



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Clarke Griffin/Lexa Smut, Endgame Clarke Griffin/Lexa, F/F, Married Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Minor Octavia Blake/Raven Reyes, Octavia Blake & Clarke Griffin are Best Friends, Parents Clarke Griffin/Lexa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-07
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2018-10-16 00:49:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 34
Words: 314,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10560580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkylarMarie90/pseuds/SkylarMarie90
Summary: Clarke and Lexa were married since they were 19, they have twins together One girl and One Boy. Everything was fine until one year ago when they broke up after someone told Clarke that Lexa had cheated on her, when Lexa refused to admit to cheating Clarke began to believe what she was told and they feel apart...can they get back to where they used to be?Lexa and Raven are twins....Octavia and Clarke are Besties :-)Yes I am more than aware Lexa and Raven are in real life two different ethnicities, however, please remember this is a STORY and not real life. I use the characters not the actors.Slow burner through the first few chapters but bare with me :-)Undecided how many chapters it'll be yet but maybe 30 maybe more I'm not sure





	1. Sickness

**Author's Note:**

> HEEELLLLLLOOOOOOO Everyone :-) Hope you are all well, thank you for clicking on this story...I hope you enjoy it and please feel free to comment :-)

**Lexa Reyes Woods & Raven Reyes Woods**

**Age: 24**

**Birthday: 21 st September 1993**

**Place of Birth: Mission Hill, Boston**

**Siblings: Lexa (Non Identical Twin)**

**Costia (14)**

**Titus Junior-TJ (11)**

**Sexuality: Lexa- Gay / Raven- Bi-Sexual**

**Parents: Augustus Woods and Alana Reyes**

**Back Story: Raven and Lexa are non-identical twins, Raven moved to live with her aunt and father in Boston when she was 13 and began misbehaving for her mum and stepfather, Titus. Their father Augustus took custody of Raven after he started dating his ex-wife’s sister, Anya, as a result, Raven had to move to Boston and leave Lexa, their siblings and her mum behind. A few months later Lexa began misbehaving for her mum and stepfather and as a result she was sent to a Military High School paid for by her mum, dad and Stepfather, until she decided she wanted to be closer to her twin at 17 and moved to live with her Aunt and Dad in Roxbury, Boston. Both Lexa and Raven are numerically dyslexic.**

**Octavia Blake**

**Age: 24**

**Birthday: 8 th September 1993**

**Place of Birth: New Jersey, New York**

**Siblings: Bellamy (28)**

**Ontari (14)**

**Sexuality: Bi-Sexual**

**Parents: Aurora and Vincent Blake**

**Backstory: Her parents broke up when she was 10 and her dad moved back to New York and remarried a woman named, Indra, when she was 14. Her mother hasn’t remarried but is dating one of the teachers at her school. She dated Jasper just after she turned sixteen they were together for six months before they broke up. She met Raven just after Raven moved when they both 13. She met Clarke when she was 6 just after she moved to Boston**

**Clarke Griffin**

**Age: 24**

**Birthday: 11 th August 1993**

**Place of Birth: Seattle, Washington**

**Siblings: Aden (17)**

**Charlotte (15)**

**Sexuality: Gay**

**Parents: Jacob (Jake) and Abigail Griffin**

**Backstory: Oldest of the Griffin children her mom, Abigail aka Abby, is a doctor at Boston Medical Centre and her dad, Jake, is The Head Engineer at Polis engineering. She came out to them at 15 to a mixed reaction from both her parents after a few months they told her that they loved and accepted her no matter what. She met Lexa when Lexa transferred to Arkadia High when they were both 17.**

**Clarke and Lexa: They got married when they were 18 just about to turn 19 and decided to start a family just after they both turned 20. At 21 they moved out of their old apartment just after the twins had been conceived and into a three-bedroom house that Lexa brought out right after closing a big deal with an upcoming artist for her record company. They were happily married until a year ago when Clarke was told by someone close to her that Lexa had been having an affair with Nia Gardia. It went downhill from there when Lexa denied it and Clarke began to suspect she was lying, Lexa moved out and into her own apartment after the coldness between them became too much for them. Clarke is now ‘dating’ Roan Gardia, Nia’s brother, she’s known him since school she decided to give dating him a chance after they started getting on more and more, and she decided to try dating him as he was nice and stable everything she was looking for at the moment, she was nervous but he told her that he was ok with them not being sexual until she was sure on account of her not dating men before.**

**Anniversary: 2 nd September (2011)**

**Profession/Job: Lexa-Music Producer/Co-Owner of Twin Records**

**Clarke-Professional Artist (Owns Griffin Ink Gallery/Also works for animation companies)**

**Children: Olivia Abigail Woods (4 going on 5) Born 05.03.2012**

**Oscar Jacob Woods (4 going on 5) Born 05.03.2012**

**They were born two months premature and were in hospital for four months before they got to go home. Clarke carried them and went through minor post-partum depression, the twins were conceived using a mysterious sperm donor who matched both Clarke and Lexa’s ethnic background. They after much discussions they decided to use a new type of treatment that allowed them you join their eggs together using their eggs to extract DNA from one and inject it into the other egg effectively placing the two different types of DNA into the one egg before it was fertilised. (LET’S PRETEND THIS EXSISTS)**

**Raven and Octavia: They started dating in High School after over a year of longing for each other. They both went to Boston University for 2 years after High School. Once they had finished University Raven asked Octavia to move in with her, which she happily accepted. After two years of living together and four of being together Raven proposed to Octavia whilst they were lying in bed together, they got married months later when they were 22 Years Old. They’d been married for over a month when they approached the subject of kids and decided that they wanted to start a family start away so their child could grow up with Olivia and Oscar.**

**Anniversary: 15 th September 2014**

**Profession/Job: Raven-** **Music Producer/Co-Owner of Twin Records**

**Octavia-Professional Stylist/Costume Designer**

**Children: Zachary Eros Woods (2 going on 3) Born Monday 08.06.2014**

**He was born a week earlier than his due date, he was in the hospital for a week before Octavia and Raven were allowed to take him home. Raven and Octavia decided to use that same egg fertilisation treatment that Lexa and Clarke had used seeing as the Twins came out identical to both Lexa and Clarke in their own ways. They used a donor who matched both of their ethnical backgrounds as well. Octavia carried Zachary after they decided they couldn’t financially afford for Raven to take four months off of work to carry their child.**

Chapter One-Sickness

Clarke was anxiously waiting for Lexa to arrive at her apartment, days ago they had meet to begin the process of their divorce a meeting that had turned into an argument between her and Lexa when Lexa refused to sign the paperwork that stated she had committed Adultery, that meeting was eventually called to an end by both of their lawyers who agreed to continue talks with their respective clients regarding the Adultery claim. It was the exact same argument that had led to Clarke and Lexa to actually break up, Clarke was willing to move on from the cheating as much as it broke her heart thinking about Lexa and her ex Nia together she was willing to deal with it for the sake of their family. But Lexa refused to own up to cheating telling Clarke over and over again that she never ONCE cheated on Clarke when they were together, after months and months of arguments Clarke had enough and kicked her wife out of the house Lexa eventually gave up under the promise from Clarke that they could try and work things out in time.

 

But with every day that went past the wedge between them became greater and greater, and they ended making it official taking off their wedding rings and officially working out a parenting schedule for the twins, the longer they were apart the worse Lexa’s denial became and Clarke became so sick of it she filed for divorce which turned into a massive argument between her and Lexa, it was the first of their arguments that the twins had walked in on. Both of them realised how toxic they were around each other at that moment in time and Raven would pick up the twins and drop them off at Lexa’s new apartment instead of them risking another argument. Raven wouldn’t really speak to her when she did pick up her niece and nephew she’d ask if they were ready and if there was anything she needed to know. Once Clarke answered those questions she would wait silently for the twins and then leave as soon as they said goodbye to their mom.

 

At first Clarke thought it was to do with her new boyfriend Roan but now she looked back at it, ever since her and Lexa ended things Raven had been really cold to her, and she didn’t blame her one bit after all she was Lexa’s twin sister their bond was greater than anything she could ever understand, the only thing she could imagine it feeling like was her bond with her children. The more she thought about it the sadder it made her because maybe just maybe all those years she had thought they were friends maybe they really weren’t. Octavia would tell her that it wasn’t about Clarke or what Raven felt about her it was about Raven supporting her family because that was the kind of person she was; she didn’t really have much family. Clarke knew Octavia was right but if she was truly honest with herself it was still something that upset her more and more everytime she thought about it.

 

And today was a day she wasn’t sure she could deal with the drama, she had woken up to a note on her pillow from Roan telling her he’d see her after he finished work. At around 8am she had made breakfast for the twins as she always did only this time Oscar didn’t emerge from his room instead Olivia came rushing down the stairs telling her that Oscar wasn’t feeling well and was still in bed. Her motherly instincts kicked into high gear and she rushed upstairs to her son’s bedroom finding him softly sobbing under the covers, checking him over she realised he had a minor fever nothing major but higher than it should be, giving him water and medicine, that was where the trouble had started her son plain refused to take any medicine until his Mama had sung him the sick song as he called it. She tried to explain why that couldn’t happen to her son but nothing she said worked on him and he became more and more adamant that he wanted his Mama, after hours of arguing with the little boy at 1pm she finally relented calling Lexa’s number from her phone, something she hadn’t done in over 9 months when Lexa harshly asked her what she wanted she explained getting a quick response from her soon to be ex-wife of ‘I’ll be there in 10’

 

It was now 10 minutes later and she was anxiously awaiting Lexa’s arrival at the house they used to share together. Olivia was sitting on the couch closest to the door occasionally peering through the window that looked out onto the porch. Clarke had tried to sit down but found herself pacing backwards and forwards occasionally smiling at her daughter. As she turned herself around to continue her pacing Olivia’s voice echoed through the room

 

“MAMA” Clark turned around to see her 4-year-old daughter rushing for the door

 

“Olivia wait” Clarke firmly stated she was trying to get the twins out of the habit of opening the door on their own she wanted them to understand the danger that could come with it. Walking forward and past her daughter she opened the door seeing Lexa just stepping up onto the porch softly smiling at Lexa she held the door open “Thanks for coming”

 

“Why wouldn't I? Their still my kids” Lexa half coldly stated, Clarke knew why Lexa was being cold with her and she understood it. Not responding she was thankful when Olivia ran past her jumping onto Lexa who lifted the little girl up “Hey baby girl…. I missed you” Lexa softly said as Olivia wrapped her arms around her squeezing her tightly

 

“I missed you more Mama” Olivia sadly mumbled into Lexa’s neck as Lexa walked forward past Clarke and into the house stopping next to the couch Olivia had been waiting on moments ago

 

“I doubt that's possible baby” Lexa joked poking her daughters stomach softly making the little girl laugh softly as she placed a kiss on her cheek “Where's your brother?”

 

“He’s upstairs in our room….” Olivia softly and sadly explained wriggling in Lexa’s arms until her Mama placed her on the floor grabbing her Mama’s hand pulling on it as she walked towards the stairs “Come Mama I’ll show you” Lexa glanced at Clarke before walking up the stairs allowing her daughter to pull and guide her to where her son was. She felt bad for ignoring Clarke but right now she wanted to make sure Oscar was ok and he was her main priority. Olivia guided her Mama up the stairs pulling her to the right where her and her brother shared a bedroom, Lexa watched as her daughter pushed the door open struggling with it slightly using her free hand Lexa pushed the door open walking through it she saw her son lying in the bed closest to the door he was facing the wall and from what Lexa could see he had his eyes closed. Olivia let go of her Mama’s hands walked towards her brother gently tapping him “Wake up Oscar” She softly whispered looking helplessly at her Mama who smiled softly nodding her head at the little girl, motioning to Olivia’s bed she watched Olivia quickly walk over to her bed which was on the opposite side of the bedroom but was level with Oscar’s bed.

 

Watching Lexa smiled as Olivia jumped onto her bed nervously smiling at her Mama and watching her every move. Kneeling down placing her knees on the ground she placed a gentle hand on her son’s back gently rubbing his back in a circular motion she could feel Oscar softly shaking under her hand. “Oscar...” Before Lexa could get out another word Oscar turned under her hand, as her eyes landed on her son she noticed the tear stains on his cheeks, though she was sure she knew the reason why she didn’t have a chance to ask Oscar why he was crying as her son launched himself at her the duvet that was covering him resting between them as Lexa caught her son in her arms holding onto him as he held onto her as if his life depended on it.

 

“Mama…” Oscar gasped out his voice not as normal as it usually was, it was weaker and sadder than it normally was when he would see her. “I missed you Mama”

 

“I missed you too baby boy….” She soothingly rubbed circles on her son’s back before standing herself up sitting down on the edge of her son’s bed, instantly Oscar moved himself around so he was on his Mama’s lap his knees bent on Lexa’s thighs holding onto her tightly still. “Mommy told me you’re not well” She softly said bringing her hand up to gently stroke her son’s hair, at the motion he lifted his head from her shoulder looking at his Mama

 

“My tummy hurts Mama”

 

“It does …. does it hurt anywhere else?” Lexa asked softly continuing to run her hand through her son’s hair as he nodded his head at her “Where else hurts?”

 

“My head and my throat”

 

“Awww….my poor baby” Lexa softly cooed as her son nodded his head leaning forward resting his head on his Mama’s shoulder his small hands grabbing onto Lexa’s jacket “How about I get some medicine from Mommy and then you and me can have some cuddle time? Does that sound good?” Lexa looked down at her son as he again nodded his head against her shoulder. Carefully moving her son from her lap and onto the bed she laid him down on it so his head was on the pillow “You stay here and I’ll be back with your medicine” Lexa softly said standing up before she could move another step she looked down seeing Olivia walking towards her

 

“I can get it Mama”

 

Lexa knelt down taking her daughters hands in her own softly saying “Thank you baby girl….be extra careful with it ok?”

 

“Ok Mama, I’ll be extra extra careful I promise” Olivia sweetly responded leaning forward and hugging her Mama tightly pulling back she kissed her Mama on the cheek before jogging out of the room. Lexa stood in the middle of the room looking around smiling when she noticed a photo on the chest of drawers that the twins shared, it was of her the twins and Clarke on the twins third birthday. Walking over to the picture she looked at it running her right hand over the picture smiling sadly as the upset filled inside her more and more, pushing her own feelings inside her down she removed her jacket placing it on the chest of drawers next to the picture she walked back over to her son’s bed noticing the bedside cabinet in between the two beds had a picture frame on it that was facing down so the picture was covered. Walking over to it she lifted it noticing it was a picture of Roan, Clarke and the twins in what looked like a park, ignoring the pang of sadness inside her she placed the picture standing up before turning around and walking back over to her son. As she sat back down on the bed she heard Olivia’s footsteps in the hallway seconds later her daughter appeared in the room smiling at her Mama as she walked quickly towards her stopping at Lexa’s knees leaning forward her hands resting on Lexa’s legs leaning forward laying her head on Lexa’s lap she wrapped her arms around her Mama’s thighs squeezing them softly;

 

“Olivia, baby didn’t you forget something?” Lexa amusingly asked looking down at her daughters back gently stroking Olivia’s longish hair, as Olivia lifted her head up Lexa kept her hand running through her daughter’s hair as the 4-year-old looked up at her Mama confused “You were meant to get some medicine for your brother”

 

“But Mommy said she will bring it up Mama”

 

“She did?” Lexa softly asked raising her eyebrows at her daughter, when Olivia nodded her head Lexa softly giggled smiling down at Olivia “Ok”

 

Olivia smiled up at her Mama softly giggling before leaning forward again repeating her action from moments ago, after a few minutes Olivia lifted her head looking up at her Mama asking “Mama, when can we come stay with you?”

 

“Remember what me and Mommy told you, how you only see me every two weeks and you stay every four weeks because of my new house” When Olivia nodded her head at the question she continued “Well remember last time you stayed was two weeks ago, that means this weekend you come see me but you don’t stay this time you stay the next time”

 

“But that is too long Mama”

 

“I know Baby” Lexa softly replied smiling at the little girl seeing the sadness in her eyes, continuing to brush her hands through some of the strands of her daughter’s hair she smiled down at her “But next time you come see me is in three days, and I’m gonna pick you up early so I can take you out and we can spend all day having fun together…ok”

 

“Ok Mama” Olivia softly responded the sadness in her voice was heart-breaking to Lexa, but she didn’t show it instead she just lifted her daughter onto her lap hugging her as Olivia wrapped her arms around her neck resting her head on her Mama’s shoulders. Lexa and Olivia stayed like that for a moment until they were interrupted by the sound of Clarke entering the bedroom holding the medicine for Oscar in her hand. Walking forward Clarke walked until she was directly behind her son leaning over him she softly said;

 

“Oscar, baby boy it’s time to take your medicine” As Oscar slowly turned around she moved a little closer to her son going to open the bottle of medicine she has brought up for her son, moving the spoon in her hand she removed the cap from the bottle smiling softly at her son, holding the spoon in the air for him to see before she could pour any of the medicine onto the spoon Oscar pulled back;

 

“NO” Oscar shouted turning back around so his back was facing his Mom, holding the covers on himself tightly

 

“Oscar” Clarke firmly stated trying to turn her son around unsuccessfully “Oscar you need to take this medicine now”

 

“NO, I WANT MAMA”

 

The comment gained Lexa’s attention even more turning her attention to her son, she looked up at Clarke noticing the upset look on Clarke’s face she softly smiled at her as Clarke placed the medicine on the floor next to the bed. Looking back to Olivia she softly smiled placing the little girl on the floor noticing the frown that appeared on her little face she leant forward softly whispering “It’s only for a second, I need to give Oscar his medicine” She smiled when Olivia let out a massive smile before she snuck forward between Clarke, who was now knelt down, and the bed softly tapping her twin brother on the back softly whispering;

 

“It’s ok Oscar, Mama has the medicine” Clarke and Lexa smiled at their daughter’s actions, watching as Oscar’s body sniffled and he slowly turned around smiling at his twin. Looking to her Mama Olivia smiled before turning around and cuddling into Clarke letting her Mommy wrap her arms around her. Clarke balanced herself a little better on her knees so she didn’t fall over watching as her future ex-wife moved closer to their son picking up the medicine from the floor, as Lexa looked back at her she handed over the spoon to her offering her a soft smile.

 

“Come on baby boy, time for your medicine” Lexa softly said as she looked down at her son seeing the weak smile on his face. She watched as her son sat up leaning forward then wrapping his arms around his Mama holding onto her tightly, using her free hand she gently stroked his head asking him softly “You feeling worse baby?” When he nodded his head very softly she placed a gentle kiss on his head. “Ok, take this and it’ll make you feel all better soon I promise”

 

“And cuddles Mama” Olivia shouted from her place in Clarke’s arms as Clarke kissed the little girl on the cheek making her giggle softly

 

Lexa let out a small laugh before looking at her daughter nodding her head softly “And the cuddles will help too” She smiled looking back to Oscar, gently moving herself back so Oscar wasn’t pressed firmly against her anymore. Looking down at Oscar she held the medicine in front of him softly looking down at him she poured the right amount of medicine onto the spoon holding it up she placed the spoon into her son’s mouth allowing him to consume the medication, once she noticed him swallow she removed the spoon from his mouth “Let me see” She stated raising her eyebrow at her son, he let out a tiny tired giggle looking up at his Mama he opened his mouth as wide as he could sticking out his tongue, Lexa checked to make sure her son had swallowed all the medicine as he was supposed to after she checked she looked at him smiling “Good boy” He let out a smile before looking up at his Mama;

 

“Kiss Mama” He softly asked lifting his head up a little more holding onto Lexa’s shirt, Lexa giggled softly to herself before leaning down and kissing Oscar on the top of his head smiling when he leant forward again wrapping his arms around her. After a second or two Lexa looked to Clarke seeing the same worry and concern in her eyes and on her face that she had seen numerous times before hand when it came to giving the twins medicine, knowing what Clarke was thinking and feeling she looked down at Oscar softly pulling the boy backwards again this time he was more resistant than beforehand lifting him and moving him around so he was sat on her lap holding her hands in place she looked at him making sure he knew he had to listen to her, once she had his full attention she spoke;

 

“Ok. So both of you have to listen to Mama right now, ok?” She asked looking at them both seeing Olivia nod her head at the question she looked down at Oscar seeing him looking up at her sweetly as he nodded as well “Good. You both know what Oscar taking the medicine means right?” Again they both nodded their heads at their Mama “Well Mama is gonna remind you just in case, it means that you can’t give kisses to your sister…” Lexa stated looking down at Oscar who was attentively looking up at her “Because your medicine is bad for Olivia right?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama’s question “Good boy” Looking over at Olivia she noticed the little girl nodding her head “It doesn’t mean you don’t love your sister it just means you love her more because you don’t want her to get sick”

 

“Because Medicine makes me sick Mama” Olivia interjected looking sweetly up at her Mama then to her Mommy for approval giggling when her Mommy nodded her head at the statement

 

“And Medicine isn’t meant to make you sick” Oscar interjected looking up at his Mama then to his Mommy and then to his sister, smiling at her he placed his hand over his mouth kissing his hand then blowing it in his sister’s direction watching as she caught it and placed it on her cheek where her brother would give her a kiss when she was sad

 

“Exactly and we don’t want Olivia to be sick do we?” Lexa watched as the twins shook their heads at the question “Good. Now time for you to get some sleep mister” She softly stated looking down at her son lifting him up onto her chest before moving and placing him onto the bed pulling the covers over him tucking him in she sat next to him on the edge of the bed her arm resting on the pillow above her son’s head, she smiled when Oscar turned himself over wrapping his arms around her waist resting his head on her stomach the way he always did when he was cuddling with her. She looked over at Olivia noticing the little girl was looking a little sad using her free hand she swirled it in the air motioning for her daughter to come over to her, which Olivia did quickly, once she was close enough the little girl rested her head on her Mama’s shoulder “Why don’t you go watch cartoons with Mommy while I help your brother get to sleep, then we can cuddle after just so you don’t get sick”

 

“Ok Mama” Olivia softly replied looking over to her Mommy “Mommy can we watch the cartoon with the super power girls”

 

“You mean the powerpuff girls?” Clarke asked moving to stand up as she looked at her daughter

 

“Yeah that one Mommy” Olivia excitedly let out as she ran over to the door waiting for her Mommy to come with her

 

Clarke stood up from the floor smiling at Lexa softly looking at their son sleeping who was now half asleep on Lexa’s stomach his small hand opening and closing around the material of Lexa’s shirt. Once she was stood up Clarke looked where she had been sitting with Olivia making sure she hadn’t left anything on the floor, she noticed the now upright picture on the bedside cabinet turning around she looked at Olivia softly saying “So You finally picked up the picture baby girl?”

 

Olivia looked at the picture her Mommy was pointing to her little face filling with anger as she ran over to the cabinet grabbing hold of the picture picking it up and throwing it onto the floor a smash coming from the glass of the frame as she looked up at her Mommy “NO, BAD MOMMY…. NOT MY DADDY”

 

“OLIVIA” Clarke instantly shouted backing hoping the volume of her voice would make her daughter calm down

 

“I DON’T HAVE A DADDY” Olivia shouted again before turning and running out of the door, loud sobs coming from her small body, Lexa went to move having watched on in shock at her daughter’s reaction to the picture, before she could move Clarke held her hand up in the air

 

“I’ll go, I upset her I’ll see she’s ok…. you stay with Oscar he needs to sleep” Clarke stated leaning down and carefully picking up the broken photo frame from the floor thankful none of the glass had gone over the floor

 

“Are you sure? I’ve never seen her like that”

 

“Well I have Lex. You deal with Oscar and I’ll deal with Olivia, she’ll be fine I promise”

 

“Ok. I trust you”

 

“Thanks Lex” Clarke softly replied naturally smiling at Lexa before turning and rushing out of the bedroom instantly moving through the house to try and find her daughter.

 

Lexa stayed where she was on the Oscar’s bed looking down at her son she could see he was looking up at her wide awake his small face filled with a happiness Lexa wasn’t sure she’d seen on him in a while “You ok there Oscar” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama smiling even more, continuing to watch her son she noticed his attention turn to the now smashed photo frame on the floor looking back to Oscar she gently stroked her son’s hair before asking “Do you know why Olivia was so upset?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama’s question sadly looking up at her “Can you tell Mama why?” Seeing the hesitation on her son’s face she softly added “I won’t tell anyone else I promise”

 

"The Lady said Roan is Daddy”

 

“The lady did?” Lexa asked getting confirmation when Oscar nodded his head. She continued “When was this?”

 

“In the park”

 

“What did mommy do?” Oscar shrugged his shoulders not really knowing what Lexa meant by the question “So who put the picture there?”

 

“Roan…. we don't like it but Mommy says yes”

 

"She does, does she?" Oscar nodded his head at the question realising that The twins must have placed the picture face down for a reason “Thank you for telling me baby boy”

 

“You’re welcome Mama” Lexa smiled down at her son he was such a polite little child even when he was sick, she watched as he looked at her before he asked “Can you sing the sick song Mama?”

 

“The sick song?”

 

“The one you sing when me and Livy feel bad”

 

“Oh the one that Mommy doesn’t like me singing” Oscar smiled up at his Mama before snuggling into her a little more “How about we don’t make Mommy angry and instead I sing a new song for you?” Oscar looked up at her his tiny face filled with excitement but masked with the pain of being sick. He nodded his head at his Mama’s suggestion so she shuffled down a little on the bed so Oscar’s head moved to rest on her chest more than her stomach looking down at Oscar she began stroking Oscar’s hair with her left hand while soothingly rubbing Oscar’s back with her right hand, taking a deep breath in she let out a final breath before she began singing the first song she could think of:

 

Standing By-Penatonix

I counted the stars tonight,

Oh how they shine so bright,

I gather them all, so we perfectly align

While we gaze from far away.

And separately watch the day

Come rising across the horizon in our minds.

 

CHOURS

But now I know,

My heart is strong,

Where you belong

Is by my side.

So will you hold,

'cause time is cold,

But in your soul

I'm standing by.

 

Ohohohohohoh ohohohohohoh

 

I have waited a thousand years,

And now that tomorrow's here,

I will shout from the mountain top

Our hearts belong near.

And we've travelled land and sea,

Our beacon the love we keep,

But when we unite,

This will all have been our dream.

 

CHOURS

 

Ohohohohohoh ohohohohohoh x4

 

And so we'll hold

Each other close

And then we'll know

We're standing by

 

Lexa finished singing looking down at her son noticing his eyes were closed and his breathing had levelled out, deciding that moving right now wasn’t the best option she relaxed a little closing her own eyes keeping her own breathing level as to not disturb her son. Also wanting to enjoy being so close to her son for the first time in a long time.

 


	2. Explanations & Communication

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa deal with an emotional and upset Olivia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realised the twin's descriptions weren't included in the first chapter so I included them in this:
> 
> Olivia: Her hair is Light Brunette (Brown) with blonde highlights in places, her hair is shoulder length, often has her hair in a braided plait one that matches Lexa’s most times. She has light green eyes. She has a mixture of Clarke and Lexa’s traits but more of Clarke’s
> 
> Oscar: His hair is Light Brunette (Brown) with natural Brunette highlights in places, his hair is shortish (About 6inches long), often he has his hair combed over to the side, He has light green eyes. He has a mixture of Clarke and Lexa’s habits/traits but more of Lexa’s

Chapter Two-Explanations & Communication

It was thirty minutes later and Lexa was woken up by the feeling of someone shaking her arm gently slowly peering her eyes open her eyes instantly landing on Clarke, who was standing over her a worried look on her face. Looking down at her son she noticed he was still asleep a little clammy but he looked perfectly fine, looking back to Clarke she asked “What’s wrong?” 

“I can’t find Olivia…I know she’s in the house but I can’t find her anywhere” Clarke anxiously explained clasping her hands together as she stood up looking down at Lexa her face filled with worry and anxiousness. She watched as Lexa carefully removed herself from Oscar’s grasp tucking her son in even more smiling when he grabbed onto the pillow hugging it tightly. Motioning to the door she walked towards it looking back and seeing Lexa following her the worry now on Lexa’s face as well. Once they were outside she closed the door not completely shutting it so she didn’t make any more noise. Seeing the unhappy look in Lexa’s eyes she motioned to the stairs not giving Lexa a chance to stop her, once they were at the bottom of the stairs back in the living room. She looked at Lexa waiting for her to say something.

“What do you mean you can’t find her?”

“I’ve looked all over the house, in all the rooms upstairs every room in the house Lexa I can’t find her”

“And how do you know she’s in the house Clarke? she could have run out of one of the doors”

“She couldn’t have got out Lexa, I locked the door after you came in and the back door is locked, so are all the windows”

“So she has to be in the house?”

“Yes, she can’t unlock the windows yet Lexa she’s tried but she doesn’t know how to…. please can you just look maybe she’ll stop hiding if you’re looking for her…. Please I’m really worried about her” Clarke asked the worry becoming clear in her body language

“Hey Clarke…” Lexa softly stated moving forward placing a hand on either of Clarke’s arms soothingly rubbing them up and down “It’s ok calm down…. I’ll find her” She stated feeling Clarke relax a little, Clarke nodded at her smiling softly at her. Lexa stood up straight looking around the room thinking about where her daughter could have disappeared to, it wasn’t hard to remember the whole of this house, not a part of it was missing from her brain no matter how long she was away from the house and not living there “Did you check the den? Assuming it’s still there?”

“Of course it’s still there Lex, I wanted to leave it to you to pack away and sometimes the twins go….” Clarke kicked herself internally she hadn’t thought to check the den because it was locked up and she kept the key away from the twins “When I checked the kitchen there was a stool next to the cabinet I keep the key in, I thought it was from earlier………I’ll go check it”

“No” Lexa let out making Clarke looked at her confused “She’s upset with you and if this is about what Oscar said it is she’s only gonna get angrier at you and not listen to anything you say. Let me go and check she’s there if she is then I’ll calm her down…. ok?” Lexa watched as Clarke softly nodded her head at Lexa’s words. Smiling softly at her she turned around walking into the next room where the den was. 

Sliding the door, she realised the door was indeed unlocked, walking into the room she closed the door behind her. As she looked around she looked at all the discs on the wall along with pictures of her, Clarke and the twins since they were born. It brought back memories being in this room, Clarke sitting on the couch sketching her while she tried to come up with the backing track or the lyrics to a new song she was working on. The instruments placed all over the room reminding her of times the twins wouldn’t go down for their naps and she would have to play them a song until they finally drifted off. The times before the twins when Clarke would be upset with her and she’d play something to get back in her wife’s good books. So many memories filled her brain and broke her heart a little more at the reminder of what they used to be. Lexa walked to her desk seeing a small pair of feet sticking out of the side of it, she smiled walking around seeing her daughter leant up against the desk holding a picture in her hand tears staining her cheeks. Kneeling down and sitting next to her she looked at Olivia who sadly looked up at her standing up and moving onto her Mama’s lap instantly, her legs hanging off of Lexa’s as she gripped onto Lexa’s shirt her head resting on Lexa’s chest, her small body turned to the side holding on to her Mama with all the power she had.

Lexa didn’t force Olivia to talked at all instead she let her daughter grip onto her and let her gently cry against her, looking down at the picture she noticed it was of her and the twins on their 4th birthday over a year before, just before things started to go awry with her and Clarke. After a while she noticed Olivia’s sobbing had subsided and she felt a little more relaxed. Looking down at her daughter she gently stroked her hair before looking at the picture and asking;

“Do you remember that day?” Olivia nodded her head smiling up at her Mama “That was one of my favourite days ever in my whole life”

“Why Mama?”

“Because I spent the whole day with my babies and your Mommy…. you woke us up and we asked if you wanted your presents and you said you just wanted cuddles…. then we spent the whole day playing”

“Mama is good at playing toys”

“I am” Lexa agreed tickling her daughter softly in the stomach before she took the picture from her daughter looking at her asking “Would you like this to go in your room?” When Olivia smiled brightly nodding her head she added “You have to ask Mommy though…. should we call her in here?”

“No Mama…. Mommy is bad”

“Hey, you can’t say that about Mommy she isn’t bad”

“I don’t like Roan…. Mommy made me keep picture”

“Maybe you should tell Mommy that then” Lexa softly added before she looked towards the door and shouted out “Clarke, can you come in here please” 

“No Mama No”

“Talk to Mommy….for me…..please….do it for Mama” Olivia looked up at her Mama still unconvinced but she nodded her head softly before resting it against Lexa’s chest again, Lexa looked up hearing the door open she noticed Clarke instantly, seeing the nervous look on her face she gestured to her to come over tapping the floor in front of her she smiled when Clarke walked towards them leaving the door open in case Oscar woke up, Clarke grabbed a pillow placing it on the floor and sitting on it “Olivia don’t you need to talk to Mommy” Olivia looked up at her Mama shaking her head she pressed it against Lexa’s chest again “Come on Livy, Mommy doesn’t know what’s wrong unless you tell her”

“I’ll get in trouble” Olivia whispered up at Lexa

“You won’t get in trouble at all baby girl I promise…” Lexa responded placing a kiss on the top of Olivia’s head before looking over to Clarke seeing the worry on her face she added “Will she Mommy?”

“Of course she won’t…. I could never be mad at my princess” At the nickname Olivia let out a small giggle looking at her Mommy rubbing her eyes softly as she looked at her Mommy 

“Really Mommy?” 

“Really” Clarke quickly responded smiling at her daughter moving a little closer to Lexa “What’s wrong princess? You can tell me”

Olivia looked up at Lexa almost as if asking for confirmation that it was ok to talk to her Mommy, when Lexa nodded her head softly Olivia turned herself around on Lexa’s lap so her back was pressed against Lexa’s chest. Looking at her Mommy she reached for Lexa’s hand grabbing hold of it and pulling it up onto her lap, almost wrapping Lexa’s arm around her as if she was a protective shield. Lexa let out a small smile at the actions of her daughter allowing Olivia to take her time in talking to Clarke. Lexa and Clarke both waited patiently for their daughter to find the words she needed to, after multiple minutes had passed by Olivia finally spoke;

“Mommy….” Olivia ventured suddenly the words fell flat as she looked at Clarke, as if she was a deer in headlights.

“What is it princess?”

Olivia played with her Mama’s hands gently tapping them and running her fingers up and down them not looking up at her Mommy, keeping her eyes on her Mama’s hands she finally spoke “I don’t like the picture Mommy” Clarke heard her daughter’s words but scrunched up her face slightly not knowing what picture Olivia was referring to:

“What picture baby?”

“The one with Roan”

“The one in your room?” Clarke softly asked, when Olivia nodded her head at the question Clarke added “But I thought you liked it” Olivia shook her head aggressively at Clarke’s words “Why didn’t you tell me baby?” Olivia quickly went quiet at the question turning herself around burying her head in Lexa’s chest again holding onto Lexa’s shirt with all her power and might.

"Mommy likes Roan…. Olivia doesn’t”

“I thought you liked him princess……why don't you like him?” 

“He's not daddy” 

“What do you mean Olivia?”

“Lady said Roan is my daddy but he's not my daddy”

“I know he isn't baby”

“Don't have a daddy…. have a Mama”

“I know you do baby….and nobody can replace Mama ever. But just because Roan stays here doesn't mean he's trying to be your daddy”

“Don’t need a daddy…need my Mama” Olivia responded her face angrily contorting as she looked at Clarke, before turning back into Lexa burying her face in Lexa’s chest again. If Clarke wasn’t so worried about explaining what Roan staying meant to her daughter she would have been amused at the fact that Olivia just gave her a look she knew the little girl got solely from her. 

“Roan isn’t trying to be your daddy Olivia; I promise he isn’t”

Olivia’s face filled with anger as she loudly said “He does Mama’s things” Lexa looked down at her daughter not sure what that sentence meant, gently stroking her daughter’s hair she placed a small kiss on Olivia’s head the action making her daughter look up at her

“What do you mean he does Mama’s things?” Lexa softly asked her daughter continuing to run her hands through Olivia’s hair

“He puts us to bed, and dresses us….and helps Mommy with bath time…. And cuddles with Mommy…...that’s Mama’s things” Olivia explained moving backwards slightly her hands moved up Lexa’s shirt more, her small hands re-gripping onto Lexa’s shirt. “Don’t want him…. Want you Mama” Olivia added her bottom lip quivering as the tears began to well in her eyes as she looked up at her Mama

“Hey, baby don’t cry” Lexa quickly responded lifting her daughter from her lap onto her chest, Olivia’s legs bending and resting on her Mama’s outer thighs, Lexa soothingly rubbed circles on Olivia’s back feeling her daughters breathing level again and her sobbing quickly ceasing. Pulling her daughter back and looking at her she softly asked “Why are you crying princess?”

“I miss you Mama”

“I know you do baby…. I miss you too” Lexa soothed leaning forward kissing Olivia on the cheek, Olivia instantly brought her hands up to rest on each of Lexa’s cheeks “I miss our cuddles…” Leaning forward she kissed both of Olivia’s cheeks seeing a small smile filling up her face “I miss helping you get dressed….” Again she placed a kiss on her daughter cheek “I miss getting splashed at bath time…” Placing another kiss on Olivia’s cheek “I miss you loads and loads baby girl….but I hate seeing my little girl sad so can you please smile for Mama” Lexa held her laugh in when Olivia gave her a classic Clarke frown, removing her hands from her Mama’s cheeks folding her arms across her chest and pushing out her bottom lip as she shook her head vigorously at her Mama’s request “Ok…you leave me no choice” Lexa let out leaning forward grabbing her daughter gently before beginning to tickle Olivia before peppering kisses all over Olivia’s face making the little girl burst into a fit of laughter as a result of her actions. She continued for a minute or two before stopping her actions leaning down feeling a massive burst of love inside her as Olivia leant up at the same time wrapping her arms around her Mama’s neck her giggle turning into a mini dirty laugh, one that was almost identical to Lexa’s.

Clarke watched on unable to stop herself from smiling and giggling along as she watched Lexa play with their daughter, over the last few days she was struggling with Olivia more and more, and now it made more sense to her maybe her little girl was missing her Mama. Maybe the picture Roan got framed and placed in the twin’s room had more of an effect on Olivia than she thought it would. Because now she knew her daughter didn’t like it, everything seemed to match up Olivia had only started misbehaving and not listening to her since the picture was given to the twins a few weeks ago. She snapped out of her thoughts when she heard Lexa’s voice talking to their daughter;

“You feel better now?” Olivia nodded her head at the question continuing to hug her Mama tightly “Can we talk to Mommy again, huh?” Olivia pulled back looking at her Mama giving her a small nod of confirmation

“Want the picture gone Mommy”

“Olivia talk properly to Mommy”

“NO, Mommy took you away” Olivia firmly stated turning and looking at her Mama giving her a firm look 

“Hey don't you give me that look missy, I own that look. You can't be bad or rude to Mommy…. Mommy didn't take me away; I'm still here…. And when your rude to Mommy it upsets her” Pointing over to Clarke she softly added “See Mommy’s upset now… so go apologise to Mommy please”

“I’m sorry Mommy” 

“You can do better than that missy, give mommy cuddles” Lexa added noticing the upset look on Clarke’s face, when Olivia looked up at her she looked firmly at her daughter who in turn released her grip on her Mama and stood up off of her lap walking over to her Mommy holding her arms out wide as she reached her. Climbing on to Clarke’s lap she wrapped her arms around her Mommy’s neck 

“I’m sorry I upset you Mommy”

"It's ok baby girl” Clarke responded not wanting her daughter to get even more upset that she was “I’m sorry about the picture princess, I didn't realise you didn't like it”

“I don't…. I want that picture” Olivia responded pointing to the picture Lexa was now holding in her hands “It has Mama in it”

“Ok….my princess wants that picture then she gets that picture” Clarke responded smiling when Olivia brightly smiled jumping forward wrapping her arms around her again this time squeezing her tightly “I’m sorry it upset you princess” She softly and genuinely whispered to her daughter, Olivia placed her hands in her Mommy’s hair gently stroking her hands through it as she lifted her head up looking at her Mommy

“It’s ok Mommy……I’m sorry I was rude Mommy…I love you loads”

“I love you too baby” Clarke responded smiling at the words her daughter had said to her moments ago. She realised now that why it might have been better for her that Lexa wasn’t around so much, for the Twins it was the worst thing possible all they had known their whole life was their Mama and their Mommy, and not having one of the two around must have been extremely hard for them they were both so much like Lexa in more ways than one, and Lexa was with them almost every hour of the day before she moved out. No wonder they were playing up and giving her attitude and being rude to her especially Olivia. Her mind wondered to Oscar upstairs ill in bed when suddenly she had an idea “I have an idea…. Wanna hear it?” 

“Yes”

“I was thinking seeing as Oscar is sick he’s going to need all of my attention for the next two days at least….so how would you like to stay with Mama for a few days until Oscar is better” Olivia let out a massive gasp of hope as she looked up at Clarke who added “…. that’s as long as Mama doesn’t mind”

Olivia looked up at her Mommy almost confirming she’d heard what she did, when Clarke smiled nodding softly at her. Olivia hugged her Mommy before pulling back jumping excitedly off of Clarke’s lap running the small space between Clarke and Lexa, stopping in front of her Mama she reached up placing her hands on her Mama’s shoulders playing with the material of Lexa’s shirt softly asking her “Can I Mama?”

“Are you kidding me spending a few days with my baby girl sounds like the best idea ever” Lexa assured her daughter seeing the smile that broke out on Olivia’s face as the little girl turned around running back over to Clarke jumping forward wrapping her arms around her Mommy 

“Thank You Mommy”

“Your welcome princess” Olivia pulled back out of the hug smiling brightly at her Mommy, it was a smile that she hadn’t seen for a long time. Giving her daughter a kiss on her cheek wrapping her arms around her at the same time, Olivia giggled loudly as Clarke placed more kisses on her cheek, wrapping her arms around her Mommy’s neck she kissed her back on the cheek giggling a little more 

“I love you Mommy” Olivia sweetly said to her Mommy hugging her tightly for a few minutes. Gently pulling her daughter back so she could look at her Clarke softly said

“I love you too princess…. Why don’t you go pack a bag of things to take with you huh?” Olivia nodded her head softly at her Mommy’s question “Good girl, make sure you don’t wake up your brother ok?” 

“Ok Mommy” Olivia softly responded kissing Clarke on the cheek before turning and running back to her Mama “Don’t leave without me Mama” She said giving her Mama her firmest and most serious look

“I won’t baby I promise” Lexa responded smiling and softly giggling when Olivia excitedly giggled before kissing her on the cheek and running towards the stairs that lead to her bedroom. Once she was sure Olivia was up the stairs and wasn’t able to hear them she looked over at Clarke and asked “Are you sure about this?” 

Clarke looked at Lexa standing herself up picking the pillow up and placing it back on the couch she had picked it up from, turning around and looking at Lexa she softly smiled “Yeah I am. I’ve been really petty the last few months you were right earlier they are your kids too Lex, you should be able to see them whenever you want…. I think that’s why I never got rid of this place” She added motioning to the room they were currently in “I knew they missed you but I thought they’d get over it because I thought I’d get over it but I never did…”

“You miss me?” Lexa asked standing herself up brushing her trousers off and leaning on the edge of the desk behind her, as she looked at Clarke questioningly 

“Of course I miss you Lex…..you were my everything, we were together for nearly ten years and together almost every single day, it was hard without you and I was being selfish because Olivia and Oscar are mini versions of you…” Clarke let out a small laugh as she smiled looking over at Lexa who she could see had a sad smile on her face “I thought that them not seeing you as much would mean that they would grow out of it and as a result I wouldn’t miss you so much, but I think I missed you more….seeing them grow every day and develop these little habits and traits that are just like yours….it only made me miss you more and more” Pausing for a second Clarke looked to floor sitting on the couch behind her knowing that she couldn’t look at Lexa for what she was going to say “Then when me and Roan started dating I thought that it would make things easier, I thought having a man around, not even a man but just someone else would make things easier for them….and for me. It was selfish of me to cut you out of their life like that, looking back on it I realise why they were misbehaving so much and I also realise it was a stupid choice to make”

“I wasn’t the one that made that choice Clarke you were” Lexa honestly answered, she couldn’t pretend that she wasn’t angry at Clarke for everything that had happened between them and the fact that she wasn’t able to see her kids when she wanted to.

“I know I did Lexa……but you made a choice when you cheated” Seeing the look that covered Lexa’s face she added “What is that look for Lexa?”

“Because I didn’t cheat…. I would never ever touch someone else and come back to you, and the fact that it’s so easy for you to believe just proves you never really loved me”

“Don’t you dare Lexa……I loved you with everything I had, my whole life was about you and where did it get me…you went and fucked someone I’ve hated for years….”

“I didn’t do anything” Lexa responded firmly forcing herself not to shout knowing if she did the twins would hear her “I know you don’t believe me and you know what that is fine but you should have NEVER taken my kids away from me as punishment…. or even thought about bringing someone else into this house…...MY house let alone a man who they don’t know, whether you knew him or not doesn’t matter Clarke he was a complete stranger to them…you know the only reason I never kicked you out was because of them…”

“I know ok Lex…. I’m a terrible mom I know I am but I can be better I know I can…. I’ll talk to Roan about him not staying over anymore I promise just please don’t take them away….” All the times that Roan had mentioned the possibility of Lexa going for sole custody ringing in her ears as she thought about the choices she’s made over the last few months 

“Take them away….” Lexa started her voice and facial expression softening at the fear in Clarke’s voice, walking over to Clarke she sat down next to her looking at her, reaching over taking Clarke’s hand she softly spoke “I would never take them away from you Clarke….I know we’ve been through a lot in the last year but I wouldn’t do that to them or to you….and you’re not a terrible mom Clarke, your human, we all make mistakes now and then it’s how we learn….look I can’t promise we won’t disagree on things, or that we won’t argue occasionally but I can promise you I would never take them from you….” Lexa looked at Clarke seeing the tears running down Clarke’s cheeks she reached up with her free hand wiping the tears away “What’s happened between me and you, is between us putting it on our kids isn’t right nor is it fair”

“I know…. I really am sorry Lex…. I just didn’t see how much it was affecting them until now, I would never ever do anything to hurt them”

“I know you wouldn’t Clarke…. I never for one second thought you would. You don’t need to apologise for anything ok?” Clarke looked at her ex nodding her head softly before leaning it on Lexa’s shoulder without a second thought. The two stayed like that for a few minutes until they sound of the front door opening Clarke to quickly lift her head from Lexa’s shoulder standing up and wiping her face she walked out of the den without a second thought about leaving Lexa alone in the den. Following Clarke, Lexa guessed that it would be Roan returning from work, her guess was confirmed when she heard Roan’s voice greeting Clarke warmly followed by Clarke returning the greeting followed by the sound of a kiss which in itself made Lexa wanna vomit. 

Swallowing back everything she was feeling inside her she walked out of the den closing the doors behind her realising she couldn’t look it due to Olivia having the key. Taking a deep breath in she turned walking back towards the living room she took her time walking there taking in all the small changes that had been made to the house including a whole bunch of pictures of her being removed. As she approached the door to the living room she heard Roan and Clarke arguing about something, from the words she managed to catch Roan wasn’t happy about Lexa turning up unannounced and being alone with Clarke, she heard Clarke explained that they weren’t alone nor was she there for any other reason than to see the twins and to make Oscar take his medication. She listened in for a little longer enjoying hearing Clarke saying good things about her, it had been a long time since she’d heard Clarke say anything good about her. Clearing her throat, she walked into the room giving Roan a small nod;

“Roan, nice to see you” Lexa politely said noticing the thankful smile and nod Clarke sent her way

“You too Lexa” Roan looked at her giving her a smile she could only describe as fake, removing his jacket he dropped it onto the arm of the couch before he leant over Clarke kissing her and walking off to the kitchen “Would you like a drink Lexa?” He asked as if rubbing salt in the wounds, making Lexa aware that his feet were fully under that table

“No, Thanks” She politely responded not wanting to make a scene with her children upstairs, looking at Clarke she softly motioned upstairs “I’m gonna say goodbye to Oscar” She said before moving up the stairs and to the Twin’s bedroom, as she reached the top of the stairs she could hear small voices coming from the bedroom knowing the voices belonged to her children she smiled entering the room seeing Oscar trying to get out of bed as Olivia tried to stop her brother “Hey Mister, what do you think you’re doing?” Lexa firmly stated looking at her son, his movements stopping as soon as he laid eyes on his Mama

“He wants to come Mama, I told him No” Olivia explained walking over to her Mama “I promise I was quiet”

“It’s ok baby, your brother is a light sleeper, like Mama.” She soothingly told her daughter gently rubbing her cheek before walking over to her son sitting down on the bed, as soon as she sat down Oscar launched himself onto his Mama gripping onto her tightly. Wrapping her arms around her son she held on tight to him feeling him softly sobbing into her shoulder she soothingly rubbed his back trying to calm him down. Lifting him and turning him around so he was sitting on her lap she pulled back a little looking down at her son “What’s wrong baby boy?” She asked, knowing she probably knew the answer to the question. But she still wanted to hear it from the little boy himself

“I wanna go with you Mama”

“I know baby but you’re sick, you have to stay here with Mommy”

“Noooo Mama, wanna stay with you” Oscar whined his whine identical to Clarke’s, gently rubbing her son’s back she softly placed a kiss on the top of his head as he gripped onto her even more than he already was.

“I know you do baby boy, but you have to stay with Mommy because she looks after you doesn’t she?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama’s question “See if you stay here then Mommy can look after you and make sure your all better for Saturday when you come see Mama”

“You’ll come back?”

“Of course I will…I promise”

“Make Mama Promise” The little boy softly stated looking up at his Mama, wanting her to promise him like she always did

“Ok…. I Mama promise you Oscar that I will come back” Holding her pinkie up to her son she smiled when he hooked his pinkie around hers squeezing it tightly before placing a kiss on his own pinkie as Lexa did the same with hers. As Oscar looked up at her, his face still clearly upset that his Mama was going to be leaving soon she asked him “Are you feeling better baby boy?”

“Little bit”

“My poor baby…. what will make you feel better?” Lexa watched as her son pondered his answer

“Can Mommy cuddle with me?”

“I’m sure she can, should we go ask Mommy?”

Oscar nodded his head at the question before looking up at his Mama his hand coming up to gently touch his Mama’s chin “Just Mommy, no Roan Mama”

“We can ask Mommy”

“NO MAMA”

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Mommy likes Roan”

“Do you like Roan?” Oscar looked to his twin sister as he leant forward resting his head on her chest as Olivia moved forward gently nodding at her brother “You can tell Mama anything Oscar” Lexa soothingly encouraged her son, who lifted his head up and looked at his Mama cautiously 

“Mommy likes Roan more”

“I know for a fact she doesn’t like Roan more than you baby”

“But no cuddles anymore Mama”

“Do you ask for cuddles?”

Oscar nodded his head at the question before speaking “But Roan is there, no Mommy cuddles anymore”

“You want Mommy cuddles now?” Oscar nodded his head at the question “Did you want Mommy cuddles before?” Again Oscar nodded his head “But you thought that Roan would be there too?” Oscar nodded for the final time. “Ok then Mama to the rescue” She softly stated making her son giggle softly and lean his head against her chest. Standing up making sure not to drop Oscar, Lexa lifted the messy duvet cover on Oscars bed holding it in one hand she placed her son on the bed so he was standing up, when he looked at her pouting she raised her eyebrows at him smirking before bringing the duvet around to cover his body seeing the smile appear on his face she laughed picking him up making sure the duvet didn’t stop her from seeing where she was going. Looking down at Olivia she asked “You got everything baby?”

“Yes Mama”

“Good girl, come on then lead the way” Lexa softly responded looking down at her daughter seeing the smile on Olivia’s face as she ran back to her bed picking up the small bag she had packed, lifting the bag she turned and walked away in front of her Mama leading the way down the stairs stopping at the door she placed her bag near the couch she was sat on waiting for her Mama a mere hour ago. She watched as her Mama walked down the stairs carefully with her twin brother in her arms. Lexa reached the bottom of the stairs looking to her left and seeing Olivia waiting for her, looking at Oscar she smiled brightly at him “My little eskimo huh?” She whispered to him seeing the excited little giggle and head nod he gave her made her heart burst in happiness. Leaning forward she placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. 

Clarke had been watching on in the kitchen having been talking to Roan about him not staying tonight using Oscar being sick as the perfect excuse. She couldn’t help how happy it made her seeing her kids and Lexa together again so much so it made her heart ache a little knowing that soon Lexa would be gone and she’d be missing them being a family once again. Feeling Roan’s eyes on her she looked back at him smiling before walking towards to living room softly speaking as she walked closer;

“Is that an eskimo or my little boy?” She laughed getting closer to Lexa, Olivia and Oscar, ignoring everything Roan was saying to her as she walked she again ignoring Roan’s eyes burning into her as she walked forward.

Oscar instantly perked up hearing his Mommy’s voice his head darting in every direction until he turned to the left seeing his Mommy walking closer he wriggled out of his Mama’s grip and out of the duvet he was wrapped in running towards Clarke “MOMMY” Lexa watched on with a smile as she moved to sit on the couch next to where Olivia was sitting, throwing the duvet on the couch next to her. As he reached Clarke’s legs she lifted him onto her chest wrapping her arms around her son smiling brightly at her son’s reaction to her entering the room. Squeezing her son softly peppering kisses on his cheek as he giggled and hugged her tightly before pushing himself up on Clarke’s chest, his hands gently in Clarke’s hair.

“Are you feeling better baby boy?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mommy “Good, I’m glad the medicine is working” Clarke watched as Oscar turned looking at his Mama, who gave her an encouraging nod, Clarke was slightly confused as to what was going on but the confusion disappeared as Oscar looked at her;

“Mommy, I’m sorry I was rude” Lexa couldn’t help but smile at Oscar’s politeness, not once had she mentioned apologising to him but yet he was apologising to his Mommy like the little gentleman he was.

“It’s ok baby boy…I know you miss Mama”

"Mommy......" Oscar nervously started looking solely at his Mommy and nobody else, playing with the edges of her hair with his hands

“What is it baby boy?”

“Can…...Can I have Mommy cuddles?”

“Of course you can anytime you know that”

“I’ll get in on that” Roan’s voice interjected as he emerged from the kitchen walking towards Clarke and Oscar, “NO” Oscar shouted as instantly wriggling in Clarke’s arms forcing her to put him down so she didn't drop him, as soon as his feet hit the ground her ran full force towards Lexa jumping into her arms as she leant forward slightly having seen him running towards her “See Mama…. I wanna stay with you” Oscar cried out gripping into his Mama tightly

“Your too sick bubba you know that…. why don't we tell Mommy what’s wrong huh? ...Because she doesn't know”

“But he’s here Mama” Oscar whispered into his Mama’s ear

“Ok, how about you sit here and I’ll tell Mommy what’s wrong…. huh just me and Mommy, how does that sound?”

“Sounds good Mama” Oscar sweetly responded kissing Lexa on the cheek “Thank you Mama”

“Your very welcome baby boy” Standing up Lexa walked over to Clarke she looked to Roan softly saying “Would you mind giving me and Clarke a minute to talk in private please?” Roan sent a scowl Lexa’s way before Clarke turned around looking at him, a sweet smile grabbing his face as he nodded at Lexa and walked out of the living room and back into the kitchen. Lexa gently took hold of Clarke’s hand pulling her to the side of the room so they were across from were Oscar was sitting on the couch, lowering her voice she explained to a confused looking Clarke “Oscar told me that he doesn’t want to cuddle you anymore because Roan always joins in…. He also told me he thinks that you like Roan more than him….” Seeing the upset creep onto Clarke’s face Lexa squeezed Clarke’s hand before quickly adding “I told him you don’t, but I think maybe hearing it from you and having some Mommy time with just you and him might make him feel better”

“He never said anything before” Clarke responded trying to stop herself from crying with her children in the room

“I think he was scared he’d get in trouble…. he only told me because Olivia encouraged him too”

“Thanks Lex” Clarke looked into Lexa’s eyes squeezing her hand before taking a few breaths making sure she didn’t look upset before turning releasing Lexa’s hand as she walked over to her son sitting down on the couch next to him.Leaning back, she smiled when Oscar looked at her shuffling himself back so he was sitting like Clarke was, leaning against the back of the couch, his eyes continuing to stay on his Mommy as he waited for her to talk “So Mama told me that…” Clarke had to stop herself as the emotion began to overflow inside her and the tears built viciously in her eyes, coughing and trying to hold back the tears she spoke “Mama told me that you think I like Roan more than you….is that true?” Oscar looked up almost guiltily at his Mommy before softly nodding his head “I’m so sorry baby boy….I don’t like Roan more than you” Clarke let out tears falling out of her eyes as she tried to wipe them without the twins noticing them “You baby boy are the most important man in my life….even more important than Grandpa, and I’m so sorry you felt like that, because I love you more than the moon and the stars and everything else in the whole wide universe” Clarke explained as more tears fell from her eyes as she looked down at her son

Seeing the tears Oscar carefully stood up using Clarke’s legs to balance himself as he stood, once he was on his feet he carefully moved forward climbing onto Clarke’s lap making sure he didn’t hurt his Mommy, reaching up he gently wiped away the tears on Clarke’s cheeks leaning forward and kissing her cheek before hugging her wrapping his arms around Clarke’s neck, his hands ending up in Clarke’s hair as he softly said “Don’t cry Mommy I love you loads and loads” Oscar’s voice was filled with way more emotion than a 4-year-old’s voice should be.

"I'm sorry baby, Mommy was just feeling a little sad”

“Why you feel sad Mommy?”

“Because Mama told me that you were feeling sad and when your sad Mommy is sad”

“But I'm not sad anymore Mommy”

“Ok, but can you do something for Mommy?”

“Anything Mommy”

“Can me and you have Mommy cuddles?”

Oscar’s face contorted slightly as he contemplated what his Mommy was saying to him “Just Mommy and Oscar?”

“Of course just Mommy and Oscar…. I want my handsome little man all to myself” Clarke let out tickling her son’s stomach making him giggle softly as he fell into her arms his hands moving to grab onto Clarke’s shirt, she peppered kisses all over Oscar’s face making him giggle out loudly the room filling with the sound of the dirty laugh he had inherited from Lexa. 

Hearing the laughter Roan walked into the room his body filled with jealously, all the time that he had spent with Clarke, Oscar and Olivia he had never heard them laugh like that before, and he knew it was because Lexa was there and the twins had their Mama back. Putting on his best smile he watched into the room with his chest puffed out and his back as straight as could be. He only managed to get a quarter of the way across the living room, seeing Lexa standing back next to Olivia who was smiling brightly at her Mama, he was stopped in his tracks when he heard Clarke clear her throat making him stop walking, looking to his girlfriend he listened to Clarke speak noticing her attention was on Oscar;

“Give mommy two minutes and I’ll be back ok?”

“Ok Mommy…. that’s 120 seconds Mommy be quick”

Leaning down placing a kiss on her son’s head she laughed softly at his words “Ok baby” Clarke stood up moving towards Roan gently taking hold of his hand pulling him to the doorway of the kitchen she looked up at him letting go of his hand “Do you mind giving me and Oscar some alone time?”

“Of course not, I’ll go upstairs for a few hours”

“No Roan” Clarke quickly responded feeling frustrated slightly at Roan’s lack of understanding, she knew he was clingy with her but she never thought he wouldn’t be able to leave to take a simple hint. “Look, I like spending time with you but Oscar needs me right now, and that means just me on my own…. what I mean is you can go home and when he’s better and I’m ready I’ll text or call you” Clarke waited patiently for Roan’s response, she’d never really told him no and she was hoping he wasn’t going to make a scene in front of Lexa.

“Ok Clarke anything you need” He responded internally shouting at himself to make sure that he didn’t speak his mind and ruin anything he had with Clarke. He knew he had to keep his jealously in check especially after waiting so long for Clarke to finally be his. Leaning down he kissed her quickly making sure that Lexa could see it, turning her walked over to the door grabbing his jacket and putting it on her, turning back to smile at Clarke “Text me when you need me to come back” Without another word he unlocked the door walking through it and closing it shut with a little more force than he originally intended. 

Clarke wanted to care about Roan’s feelings at this moment but right now the only man on her mind was her son, she’d let him feel neglected and unloved without knowing it and now that she knew she was determined to make sure he was happy and felt as loved as he was. Looking over at Oscar she broke out into a smile when she noticed the massive smile that was across her son’s face, he was now sat on his knees on the couch his hands clasped together as he looked excitedly at her.“Mommy and Oscar time begins now” She happily said looking over at her son, watching as he let out a small giggle carefully standing up on the couch he excitedly and carefully jumped down running full force towards Clarke until he reached her arms, once he was close enough she lifted him up onto her chest his arms wrapping around her neck as he kissed her shoulder as he hugged her. Gently rubbing his back, she placed a kiss on Oscar’s shoulder as she hugged him tightly. Oscar pushed himself up looking at his Mommy he reached up gently rubbing his hand over Clarke’s mouth and lips before wiping his hand on his shirt, Clarke looked at him confused as she asked “What was that for baby?”

“Nasty kisses Mommy”

“Nasty kisses?”

“No Roan kisses for Oscar, just for Mommy….” When his Mommy continued to look at him confused he let out a loud ‘tut’ like she should know what he was talking about. Rolling his eyes in a ‘Clarke move’ as Lexa always called it he looked at his Mommy and said “Germs Mommy”

“Oh Germs…. of course. Sorry baby Mommy had a blonde moment”

Oscar let out another dirty laugh looking at Clarke and saying “Mama says that Mommy”

“She does?”

“Yeah Mama says Mommy has Blonde moments”

“Hey Mister, don’t try and get me in trouble” Lexa interjected making Clarke and Oscar both laugh, as she smiled along Olivia pulled on her Mama’s sleeve gaining her attention “What’s wrong baby girl?”

“Can we go now Mama?”

“Why baby what’s wrong? Don’t you wanna spend time with Mama, Oscar and Mommy all together?” Lexa watched as Olivia went silent her head looking to the ground, as she looked at her daughter a little harder she noticed the little girl had small circles under her eyes “Are you tired baby?” She asked, seeing Olivia nod her head softly “Do you think this is a dream?” Olivia nodded her head at the question a single tear escaping her eye rolling down her cheek, moving closer to the little girl Lexa reached up wiping the tear away picking her daughter up she gently held her “It’s not a dream princess I promise” Olivia sniffled back more tears her small body shaking slightly before she looked at her Mama and said

“Mama is always in my dreams then your gone”

“I’m sorry baby, that must really upset you” Olivia nodded her head at her Mama, Clarke walked over to them reaching over and gently stroking her daughter’s hair as she looked down at her asking

“Why didn’t you tell me baby?”

“When we say Mama you get sad” Olivia let out sadly looking at her Mommy before adding “Don’t like when Mommy is sad”

“You didn’t say anything to protect Mommy?” Olivia nodded her head at the question, causing Clarke to look at Lexa in amazement at their daughter’s words. Leaning forward holding on tightly to Oscar, Clarke placed a kiss on Olivia’s head before asking her “How about we have some Wood’s family time huh? I was thinking we can all watch a movie? What do you both think?”

Olivia looked up at her Mama as Oscar’s attention turned to his Mama as well “Can we Mama?” Olivia sweetly asked as Lexa smiled down at her 

“Of course….as long as Mommy doesn’t get to choose the film”

“Hey I have awesome film choice….” Looking down at Oscar she asked him “Don’t I baby boy?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mommy’s question leaning his head forward resting it against his Mommy’s shoulder, Clarke placed a gentle kiss on his forehead as she looked at Lexa “See…”

“Clarke you have horrible taste in films…. Isn’t that right Livy?” Olivia looked at her Mama nodding her head doing to Lexa exactly what her brother had just done to their mommy “See…”

“Suck Up” Clarke and Lexa said at the same time making the twins giggle loudly at them from their places against Lexa and Clarke’s shoulders. Hearing the giggle and how pure the twins’ laughter was brought a natural smile to both Lexa and Clarke’s faces. 

“How about we put it to a vote huh?” Lexa suggested looking over at Clarke who nodded her head at the question

“A Family Vote Mama?” Olivia asked looking up at her Mama her hand coming up to gently stroke Lexa’s chin, something the little girl always did when she was getting tired, Lexa nodded her head softly at Olivia unable to respond to her daughter. “Ok, me and Oscar will pick films” Olivia stated wriggling out of Lexa’s grip gently rushing over to the DVD rack followed closely by her brother who had wriggled out of Clarke’s grip at the same time Olivia had done with Lexa. 

“You’re not in a rush to get back to the studio are you?” Clarke asked looking at Lexa, taking in a few things that had changed in her ex since they had separated, she couldn’t help but smile when Lexa looked at her smiling softly and shaking her head, before turning her attention back to the twin’s her smile covering her whole face “It’s been so long since we did this”

“I’m in no rush at all, and I know what you mean…. I miss it” Lexa honestly replied looking back to Clarke smiling then again looking back to the twin’s “We have movie night at mine when they stay but it’s not the same”

“I know…...it’s different when it’s all four of us”

“Yeah….” That was all Lexa managed to get out before the twins came running over to her and Clarke holding one DVD together, each of them with a hand on the DVD 

“This one” The twins said at the same time, Oscar looking at Clarke and Olivia looking at Lexa, Lexa reached down taking the DVD from them and examining it she handed it to Clarke who examined it then smiled at it

“Are you both sure?”

“Yes Mommy” Olivia let out smiling brightly at Clarke as she moved forward wrapping her arms around Lexa’s legs holding onto her trousers a little 

“Ok then…. Jungle book it is” Clarke confirmed smiling at Lexa knowing the film was one of Lexa’s favourite films of all time, there was no mistaking where the twin’s got their love for the film from “Come on then you two, on the couch get ready I’ll get you both something to drink”

“HOT CHOCOLATE” Olivia and Oscar loudly asked looking from Clarke to Lexa at the exact same time making both women have to supress the smile from bursting onto their faces

“I’ll think about it” Clarke let out seeing the disappointment on their faces, Oscar was the first to move, moving to Clarke’s legs he looked up at her 

“Please Mommy”

“Will it make you feel better?” She asked knowing full well what her son’s answer would be. There weren’t many times lately that she’d treat them to sweets or a Hot chocolate as a treat, and she knew that they both had Lexa’s sweet tooth so she decided that one hot chocolate wouldn’t be that bad not in the long run. Oscar would always listen to anything she told him and Olivia was exactly the same with Lexa. Looking at her son she saw him nod his head at her question, kneeling down and looking into his eyes she softly said “Ok then, if it’ll help my baby feel better, you can both have a hot chocolate” She smiled when they both let out a small ‘yes’ “Now why don’t you both get on the couch and get comfy with Mama while I go make your hot chocolate”

The twins nodded their heads at her statement before they looked at each other, Olivia let go of Lexa’s legs and moved forward both of them hugging Clarke at the same time “Thank you Mommy” They both softly said each of them kissing her on the cheek nearest to them. Smiling at Clarke they turned around and ran to the couch jumping up on it pulling the duvet over them both as they looked over at Lexa “Quick Mama” Lexa smiled at Clarke before moving towards her children sitting herself down next to Olivia she laughed when Oscar looked at her and said “But I want cuddles too Mama” 

“Ok my prince, how about I sit in the middle huh?” 

“Yeah” The twins both excitedly let out, Lexa looked at the them seeing the happiness on their faces as Oscar lifted up the duvet for his Mama to get under the duvet with them, standing and sitting between them the twin’s cuddled onto Lexa’s side, once they were comfortable Oscar threw the duvet towards Olivia who pulled the duvet towards herself more so it was covering all three of them. Both of the twin’s looked up at their Mama smiling brightly before they leant against her chest as she wrapped her arms around them both. 

Clarke smiled at the three of them before walking over to the Blu-ray player turning it and the TV on, opening the disc tray she placed the disc in it closing the tray she stood up picking the remotes up as she did so, walking over to Lexa and the twin’s she handed the remotes to Lexa she softly said “I’m gonna make the drinks, do you want a coffee or are you still into those herbal teas?”

“Hey My herbal teas are the best”

“They taste like mint Mama” Oscar sweetly said laughing softly looking up at his Mama 

“Yes they do bubba” She confirmed with her son ruffling his hair gently before looking back to Clarke “Coffee is fine if you don’t have any herbal tea”

“No I think I do have some, I’ll see if I can find them”

“Thanks” Lexa responded as Clarke smiled at her turning around walking to the kitchen Lexa couldn’t help but smile watching Clarke walk into the kitchen until she was no longer in sight. Looking back to her twin’s she softly asked “Are we going to wait for Mommy or start the film now?”

“We have to wait Mama” Olivia quickly responded Oscar nodding his head in agreement 

“Ok then” Lexa confirmed giggling softly at their comment, she sat their silently listening to the twins talk about something, she had no idea what they were talking about but she was sure it was entertaining and important to them both. They continued to talk over her lap amusing her massively, her attention was brought to the kitchen when she heard Clarke calling out her name “I’ll be back, Mommy needs me” She said to the twins removing the duvet and standing up placing the duvet back over the twins smiling as she noticed they continued to talk about whatever it was they were talking about. 

Lexa walked into the kitchen turning the corner she saw Clarke on her tip toes reaching into one of the cabinets, Lexa couldn’t help but smirk at Clarke’s attempts as she tried continued to try and reach whatever was in the cabinet, seeing Lexa in the corner of her eye she looked towards her “I can’t reach your herbal tea things” She explained, Lexa quickly moved forward laughing softly she was only a three or four inches taller than Clarke but still it made it easier for her to reach things Clarke couldn’t. Stopping behind the blonde Lexa reached up grabbing what Clarke was attempting to get, as she did the front of her body rubbed up against the back of Clarke’s, Clarke’s ass rubbing into her hips as she removed the box of herbal tea from the top shelf of the cabinet, they both took in a deep breath as Clarke turned around her hips brushing across Lexa’s as they came face to face, Lexa held the box in between them making space between them before she found it too hard to do so, handing the box to Clarke she softly said “Here….um….do you need me to help?” She was hoping the question would remove some of the tension between them both after the ‘moment’ they had just shared

“Umm…” Clarke shakily let out before clearing her throat and answering “Making the drinks no…but I might need a hand carrying the cups though”

“Ok I’ll wait for you to make the drinks then” Lexa smiled trying not to let the feeling of Clarke against her affect her mind too much “So how have you been lately?”

“Seriously Lex, is that the best you can come up with after my butt was just pressed against your hips like that?”

“Well I was trying not to talk about it to be honest”

“Why?”

“Because it was weird, and not to mention that it’s the closest we’ve been physically in a long time”

“Don’t you miss it though?”

“Miss what exactly? Your ass pressed against by pelvis?”

“Oh ha ha, you know what I mean Lexa”

“Of course I miss it Clarke”

“Do you get lonely?” Clarke asked as she heard the kettle click signalling it was boiled and the water was ready to be poured. She listened for Lexa’s response as she reached for the kettle lifting it and filling to cups she had prepared with water

“Sometimes I do yeah”

“Me too, I just want someone to hold me sometimes the way you used to” Clarke honestly replied not daring to look at Lexa knowing exactly what her ex was about to say

“The difference is I don’t have a boyfriend”

“I know ok, but it’s different with Roan I can’t explain it any more than you can explain why you cheated”

“Seriously Clarke” When Clarke looked at her confused she explained “Why is it everytime we talk about something remotely normal to conversations we used to have, you feel the need to somehow bring up the subject of me cheating? ...which I didn’t by the way” Seeing the look of slight disappointment on Clarke’s face Lexa added “I get it now…”

“Get what Lexa?”

“You think if you keep dropping it in there then I will admit to cheating…. that’s a good idea except there’s one major floor Clarke……I did not cheat on you”

“I don’t see why you can’t just admit it…. it’s not like you’ve got anything to lose anymore” Clarke closed her eyes scrunching up her face as she removed the spoon from the twin’s hot chocolate placing it in the sink, she knew that was a stupid thing to say

“Nice cheap shot Clarke” Lexa let out moving forward grabbing the two cups picking them up and walking out of the kitchen not giving Clarke a chance to say another word to her. Clarke leant forward her head banging against the cabinet door slightly getting out a groan, she kicked herself internally she knew that was low of her to say to Lexa especially considering they were only just back on good terms. Taking a deep breath in she stood back up looking down at the cups picking them up she took another deep breath walking into the living room seeing Lexa sitting between their twin’s the coffee table now closer to them so the twin’s hot chocolate could cool down before they drank it. As she walked closer to the three of them she looked at Lexa still noticing the look of upset in her eyes. Sitting down on the free side of Oscar she carefully handed Lexa her herbal tea, Lexa accepted the cup not saying a word to her instead placing the cup on the table in between the hot chocolates she pressed play on the remote starting the film. The awkward silence filling the room as the twin’s giggles replaced it.


	3. Family Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Woods Family have a little quality time.

** CHAPTER THREE **

Woods Family House (16:00)

They had been watching the film for about twenty minutes when Lexa’s phone began buzzing in her pocket, pulling it out she noticed it was Raven calling her, standing up she walked towards the door without a second thought. The phone rang off before she could get outside, as she placed her hand on the handle beginning to turn it;

 

“NO MAMA STAY….” Olivia’s voice bellowed out as she jumped down from the couch just missing the table in front of them as she ran towards Lexa, wrapping her arms around her legs

 

Looking down at her daughter she quickly placed her phone in her back pocket before removing Olivia from her leg gently before leaning down so she was level with Olivia, seeing the tears escaping her eyes she was about to speak when Olivia moved forward wrapping her arms around her neck slightly a small sob escaping her as she held onto her Mama. Soothingly rubbing circles on her daughter’s back, after a few seconds she pulled back looking into Olivia’s eyes she softly explained “Mama isn’t leaving…. not without my baby girl anyway” When Olivia looked at her trying to hug her again she firmly but gently held her daughter in place “I promise look….” She started pulling her phone out of her back pocket bringing up her calls she showed Olivia “Auntie Raven called me…. I was just going outside to answer it”

 

“But it’s movie time Mama”

 

“I know baby…. but you know Auntie Raven doesn’t call unless she really needs me at work”

 

“For the music Mama?”

 

“Exactly baby girl…. for the amazing music” Lexa felt the worry lift itself slightly as Olivia giggled softly and smiled, looking at Olivia she asked “So is it ok if I go call Auntie Raven now?”

 

Olivia contemplated for a moment before looking back at her brother and Mommy, then looking back to her Mama she stepped in closer to her whispering “Will you come back Mama?” Lexa realised her daughter was a little embarrassed about missing her seemingly more than Oscar did, she softly whispered back;

 

“Of course” When Olivia looked at her unconvinced her eyes way too close to a puppy’s eyes for her liking, thinking for a second she softly said “Wait here for a minute, ok?” Olivia cautiously nodded her head, Lexa placed a gentle kiss on her cheek before turning and running up the stairs into the twin’s bedroom, finding her jacket she picked it up running back down the stairs stopping back in front of Olivia. Reaching into the inside pocket she pulled out her car keys, throwing the jacket on the side arm of the couch she looked to Olivia lifting the keys she took one of Olivia’s hands in her own placing the keys in them “How about you look after these for Mama?” Olivia looked at her slightly confused “See those are my car keys, so if you have them I can’t drive off without you”

 

Olivia let out a small gasp as a smile filled her face looking at her Mama she whispered “I’ll look after them Mama I promise”

 

“I know you will baby girl…. So why don’t you go sit with Mommy and Oscar, and watch Jungle Book while I call Auntie Raven and see what she needs”

 

“Ok Mama” Olivia sweetly replied before turning to walk back to her spot in the couch, stopping herself she turned around running back to her Mama hugging her tightly whispering “I love you Mama”

 

“I love you too baby” Lexa whispered back kissing Olivia on the cheek releasing the hug watching as her daughter turned and ran back to the couch happily, the sound of the keys in her hand jingling loudly. Once Olivia was on the couch back under the covers, she instantly showed her brother the keys seeing him smile and giggle before he looked at his Mama and said “Hurry Mama, before you miss the best part” Lexa smiled nodding at her son and saluting him before turning to walk out of the door, pulling her phone out as she did so. 

* * *

 

** -Twenty Minutes Later- **

Clarke was sat with the twin’s watching the film, smiling as they sang along to some of the songs in the film and as they booed Kai the snake as he hypnotized Mowgli, even though she was enjoying the film she couldn’t help but keep turning towards he door hoping for Lexa to come through it again. She wanted to apologise for her harsh retort earlier but more than that she just wanted to see her ex, somehow just having her in the same room made her feel warm and safe inside, it was something she had grown to miss over the last few months. She was more than happy when the door opened and Lexa walked into the room softly smiling at Clarke, seeing her Mama Olivia jumped up rushing over to her Mama holding the keys in her hand in front of her Mama

 

“Look Mama, I looked after them”

 

Kissing Olivia lovingly on the cheek Lexa pulled back looking at her daughter “Thank you baby” Lexa paused for a second before looking at Clarke and softly saying “I have to go Clarke…. I’m sorry but there’s an emergency at the studio…Raven’s ruined a track and needs me to retrieve it from the system because she doesn’t know how to, If I could stay I would but the deadline for the track is tonight”

 

“Um…. ok” Clarke responded seeing Oscar’s attention dart to Lexa and Olivia “Do you need Olivia to stay here while you sort it out?”

 

“Well that depends on what my baby girl wants….” She started looking at her daughter before asking “You wanna stay here and watch Jungle book with Mommy and Oscar or would you like to come to the studio with Mama?”

 

Olivia was quiet for a moment before she smiled looking at her Mama “I wanna go with you Mama”

 

“Ok then, that’s decided then go say bye to Mommy while I say bye to Oscar ok?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mama before letting her place her on the floor, turning she ran back towards Clarke jumping onto her lap wrapping her arms around her Mommy as Clarke wrapped her arms around her daughter at the same time

 

“Bye Mommy” She sweetly said placing a kiss on her Mommy’s cheek before going to shuffle down only to be held up by her Mommy who squeezed her tightly “You have to let go Mommy, I’ll be back soon” She stated having pulled herself back to look at her Mommy’s face

 

Clarke couldn’t help but laugh at her daughter’s comment leaning forward she kissed Olivia on the cheek, placing numerous kisses in a row in the same spot making her daughter burst into laughter, pulling back she look at Olivia and softly said “I know it’s only for a few days…. but Mommy is gonna miss you loads and loads so I want the biggest cuddles ever”

 

“Ok Mommy” Olivia sweetly smiled leaning forward her chest connecting with her Mommy’s as she squeezed her as tightly as she could, as requested by her Mommy.

 

Across the room Oscar was standing on the couch looking up at his Mama, his face filled with sadness as he looked up at her, kneeling down she rested her arms on the armrest of the couch smiling as her son copied the action leaning forward his head stopping in front of his Mama’s “You know Mama has to go now?” She asked seeing her son sadly nod his head at the comment, her mouth forming into a sad frown/smile as he looked up at his Mama “Hey Mr frowny, there’s no need for that”

 

"But I'm gonna miss you Mama”

 

“Why are you gonna miss me baby?”

 

“Because you’re my Mama”

 

“I know that baby I'm sorry Mama meant you don't need to miss Mama because I'm always here because I'm in here….” She paused pointing to his heart

 

“Not the same Mama”

 

“I know my little prince but now you have something to keep to help you remember” Lexa started seeing the confused look on her sons face she nodded her head at the leather jacket she had thrown on the couch before she went outside, she smiled as Oscar gasped out loud looking at the jacket his hands moving to his Mama’s face gently holding onto her cheeks looking into her eyes, he hopefully asked her:

 

“Really Mama?”

 

“Yep really…...but only until I come back for you then I'll give you something to keep forever” Lexa was sure that her sons smile would falter knowing he had to give back the jacket but she was pleasantly surprised when the smile stayed firmly on and Oscar only moved forward until his mouth was next to her ear, his hands falling from her cheeks as he asked;

 

“Can I wear it Mama?”

 

“Of course you can” Lexa smiled picking up the jacket she watched as the smile on Oscar’s face grew bigger and bigger until it covered almost the whole of his face making her smile grow bigger as well. Holding the jacket in the air, she held it behind her son smiling when he excitedly jumped up and down on the spot his little feet moving up and down quickly, slipped his arms into each of the sleeves his giggle getting louder and more excited as Lexa pulled the jacket over his chest doing the zip up. Leaning forward she placed a gentle kiss on Oscar’s cheek “I’ll see you soon my little prince”

 

“See you soon Mama…” Oscar sweetly responded leaning forward wrapping his arms and the oversized sleeves of his Mama’s leather jacket around his Mama’s neck, his voice slightly gravely from being sick. “I’ll miss you Mama…. I love you a million billion stars”

 

“I’ll miss you too baby boy….” Lexa started trying to stop the upset from vocalising itself when she spoke “And I love you……” Lexa couldn’t help but feel a burst of happiness inside herself as her son looked at her his face bubbling with excitement and anticipation as he waited for her to complete the sentence “A…. Billion trillion Gazillion stars”

 

“My Silly Mama” He responded kissing her on the cheek before unable to stop himself laughing as he did so. As he pulled back he placed one more quick kiss on his Mama’s cheek before he turned around still smiling running across the couch until he reached his Mommy who was just letting go of Olivia. As his twin sister stood up from their Mommy’s lap she stood up in front of him, both of them stepping forward and hugging each other tightly. After a second they both turned around and hugged their mommy at the same time, Clarke only just able to stop herself from falling back as she laughed hearing Oscar say “Mommy Twin cuddles” After a minute had passed the twins let go hugging each other again quickly before Olivia jumped down from the couch running over to Lexa excitedly, as she reached her Lexa lifted her into the air and onto her chest kissing her lovingly on the cheek.

 

“We can go now Mama” Olivia stated resting her head on her Mama’s shoulder her arms wrapping around her Mama’s neck as her legs stayed wrapped around her Mama’s waist holding on for dear life. “I wanna see Auntie Raven” She let out with a massive toothy grin on her face as she looked up at her Mama.

 

“I bet Auntie Raven will be happy to see you”

 

“She will Mama?”

 

“Of course she loves her little Liv Liv” Lexa laughed softly seeing Olivia’s cheeks blush a little at her sentence placing numerous kisses on her daughters cheek before pulling back and looking at her son and her ex “We’re gonna leave now….but we’ll be back in a few days” She stated mainly looking at Oscar as she spokes seeing the little boy nod his head, looking to Clarke she softly added “I’ll text or call you when I know for sure what time I’ll pick Oscar up…also to check he’s ok to still come with me”

 

“Ok…...Bye princess” Clarke responded wrapping her arms around her son seeing he was starting to get a little upset, as he always did when he had to say goodbye to his Mama, she imagined that it was worse for him now having to say goodbye to his sister as well even if it was for a few days

 

“Bye Mommy…. Bye Oz” Olivia loving said waving at her Mommy and her twin brother, Oscar softly smiled and waved back at her watching as his Mama opened the door walking out of it.

 

Once the door closed Clarke wrapped her arms around her son even more bringing the duvet on the couch over him slightly, placing a kiss on his head she noticed how he was just staring at the door, whispering in his ear she softly said “How about we watch the rest of this film?” Oscar looked up at his Mommy shaking his head

 

“Not the same without Mama”

 

“I know baby boy, but if we watch it then when you talk to Mama later you can tell her all about it”

 

“Later?”

 

“Yeah…you wanna call Mama later on right?” She asked her son as he looked up at her shifting himself around so his knees were pressing on Clarke’s thighs slightly, when she raised her eyebrows at him he nodded his head at her question “Then later on before you go to bed, you can call Mama to say goodnight” Clarke was slightly taken aback when Oscar launched himself forward, the leather from Lexa’s jacket hitting her face slightly as he wrapped his arms around her neck

 

“Thank you Mommy”

 

“Your welcome Oscar” She responded as her son pulled back a smile spread across his face, he climbed onto her lap sitting himself so his legs dangled over her thighs as his back and head rested on her chest, gently tugging at the jacket she said “Did Mama say you could keep this?”

 

“Mama said I can keep it until…. until she comes back” Oscar answered his concentration on the TV as the film continued on, he began to bounce up and down on Clarke’s legs in excitement as he watched the film and Bare Necessities came on

 

“Ok, but you have to take it off at bedtime” Clarke said firmly getting no answer from her excited son “Oscar” She said again, and again she got no response from her son is attention fully on the TV and nothing else as he leant against her holding onto the jacket he was wearing as he giggled along, ignoring all the questions and thoughts running through her mind she turned her attention back to the film, holding onto her son as he giggled and sniffled occasionally as her watched the screen in front of him. 

* * *

 

** Lexa’s Studio- Heda Records Ltd (17:30) **

Lexa walked into the studio after getting out of the car Olivia had told her she wanted to surprise her Auntie Raven, she then told her Mama how she was going to surprise her the look that she gave Lexa made her Mama decide to just go along with it. Holding her daughters hand until they reached the door of the studio leaning down she made sure that Olivia knew not to run away once she’d gone inside, once her daughter confirmed she wouldn’t run away Lexa walked into the studio seeing her twin sister sitting at the panel in front of an empty recording booth as she was seemingly trying to recover the track she had lost, turning around seeing her sister Raven stood up walking over to her and hugging her gratefully as she let out a puff of air. Lexa let out a laugh before sitting down at the panel beginning to fiddle with some buttons on the panel, shaking her head she softly she looked back at her sister softly saying;

 

“I think we’ll need some help with this” Seeing Raven hang her head she watched on as she heard a knock at the door looking to Raven she smirked adding “That’s probably the cavalry now” She watched Raven’s face fill with confusion at how someone could get there so quickly, standing up Lexa walked to the door opening it slightly, within a second Olivia ran into the room

 

“SURPRISE” The little girl shouted running towards her Auntie who now had a smile spread across her face, Raven began to move forward as well until they meet each other Raven lifting Olivia into her arms hugging the little girl tightly, it had been way too long since she’d seen her niece. Pulling back, she peppered kisses all over her niece’s face making the little girl wriggle in her arms in laughter, once the laughter had stopped Olivia looked up at Raven softly asking "Are you happy to see me?”

 

“Are you kidding me? ...I am Soooo happy to see you, I missed my little Liv Liv” Raven smiled when Olivia leant forward wrapping her arms around Raven and hugging her again. Her eyes looking over to Lexa and asking “How comes you have her?”

 

Before Lexa could answer the question Olivia pushed herself back, pressing her eyes against Raven’s shoulders looking at her Auntie and saying “Oscar is sick….and he wanted Mama….so Mama came…” Looking around to her Mama she softly added “Right Mama?”

 

“Right baby” Lexa responded smiling at her daughter and sister, walking forward she listened as her daughter began speaking to Raven happily.

 

“When we woke up Oscar wasn’t well…. I gotted Mommy and he told her that he wanted Mama….and he said no medicine until he saw Mama…” She expressed looking at Raven, her face serious and meaningful as she explained everything to her Auntie, Lexa and Raven both smirking at how grown up the little girl sounded at this moment “Mommy called Mama and Mama came” Olivia let out a massive grin spreading across her face “”When Mama got home, she gave Oscar the medicine and he went to sleep…..then…” Olivia looked to her Mama her face filling with small sadness as she remembered what happened with the picture, her look almost asking her Mama what to say Lexa smiled at her daughter before continuing for her;

 

“Olivia got a little upset at a picture in her room and ran away and hid in my den….”

 

“Not my daddy Mama”

 

“I know baby…” Lexa soothingly responded seeing the confused look on her sisters face she explained “There was a picture in the twins’ room of them, Clarke and Roan, from what I can gather when they were taking it a woman said that Roan was their daddy in some way, then he put that picture in a frame in their room….they thought that Clarke wanted them to keep it and that they weren’t allowed to take it down….Olivia got upset at the picture….We chatted and she told her Mommy that she didn’t like her picture and her Mommy said that was fine didn’t she Olivia?”

 

“Yes Mama”

 

“Then she apologised for being rude to her Mommy because…” Lexa started looking over to her daughter to finish the sentence

 

“Because shouldn’t be rude to Mommy or Mama”

 

“Good Girl…...” Lexa smiled softly before continuing to explain to her sister “Anyway, Clarke suggested that because Oscar is sick maybe it’d be better if Olivia stayed with me for the next few days, that way she can give Oscar all her attention”

 

“No Way….” Raven started looking at her niece “Your staying with Mama?” Olivia lifted her head nodding at her Auntie Raven’s question “We are sooooo having a movie night…”

 

“Can Aunt Octavia and Zack come too?” Olivia sweetly asked looking at her Mama and her Auntie the excitement filling her small face as she looked at them.

 

“Maybe, I’ll ask her…. but Zack isn’t well so she might not be able to come…ok?”

 

“Ok…. but you will ask right?”

 

“Of course I will, I promise”

 

“Ok……...Have you fixed it Mama?” Olivia let out as she looked over at her Mama resting her head on Raven’s shoulder

 

“Nearly baby girl….”

 

“Can I help Mama?”

 

“Of course…. come over here” Lexa softly responded holding her arms out for her daughter, watching as Raven placed her on the floor and she ran quickly over to her Mama, Lexa lifted Olivia’s onto her lap turning them around on the chair until so they were at the panel again. Her hands going back to the keyboard she had connected to the hard drive under the panel, the same hard drive that kept all the songs on it. She placed her hands under Olivia’s, the little girl rested her arms gently on her Mama’s as they began typing on the keyboard. Olivia watched her Mama typing her face filled with amazement, looking up at her Mama smiling she giggled when her Mama leant down and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. Olivia leant back against her Mama’s chest a little more, Lexa continued to work on retrieving the song that Raven had accidentally deleted, after a few minutes she managed to find the track in question tapping everything she needed to, she looked down at Olivia and said “I think we’ve got it, I just need my princess to help me” Olivia sat forward more in excitement looking back and up at her Mama waiting for instructions. “Ok, press these buttons then the one that says Enter and the track will come back”

 

“Ok Mama” Olivia sweetly responded leaning forward and carefully pressing the buttons her Mama had told her too before reading the words and letters on the keyboard until she found the ‘Enter’ button, smiling brightly and giggling she pressed ‘Enter’ and waited for the song to appear on the screen. Looking up at her Mama she waited for an explanation

 

“Perfect…. you did it” Lexa let out as she moved the mouse around going to the file the track had been restored in, lining up the track she adjusted the volume before playing the track looking down at her daughter.

 

“I DID IT” Olivia shouted out bouncing up and down on her Mama’s lap, Lexa pushed the chair back slightly as Olivia turned to look for Raven, when she saw her sitting on a couch behind them Olivia jumped down from her Mama’s lap running over to Raven and jumping on her excitedly “I did it Auntie Rae”

 

“Yeah you did, here I was thinking that Mama was gonna save me but turns out you were my saviour” Raven responded poking her niece softly in the stomach, as Olivia wriggled around on her lap before sitting herself up the laugh still playing in her throat “Good job Livy”

 

“Thank you Auntie Rae” Olivia sweetly said before jumping down from Raven’s lap running the small space back to her Mama, stopping as she reached her legs looking up at her Mama she asked “Mama, what do we do now?”

 

“Now we’re just waiting for the track to upload to the server then the person who asked us to make the track can log in with their code and password and download the track”

 

“What does the person do with it Mama?”

 

“They play it then sing over it”

 

“Like Mama sings?”

 

“Yeah like Mama sings…but better”

 

“Nobody sings better than you Mama”

 

“Thank you princess” Lexa smiled out looking down at her daughter as the screen next to him binged, turning to face the screen she looked noticed that the song had been uploaded to the server. Turning back to her daughter she said “It’s all finished now so how about we go home huh?”

 

“Yeah….is movie night tonight Mama?” Olivia asked looking up at her Mama suddenly wanting to spend time with just her Mama

 

Lexa looked over at her sister for a second seeing the small shake of the head knowing Octavia and Raven’s son wasn’t well at the moment and her sister was more than likely wanting to go home to check on him and to check on Octavia as well. Looking down at Olivia she noticed the small look of guilt on Olivia’s face guessing her daughter wanted them to be alone with her, deciding to make it easy on her twin and her daughter she spoke “Well I was thinking, I wanna spend some time alone with my baby girl….so maybe Aunt Raven and Aunt Octavia can come around tomorrow or the day after for their movie night…. does that sound alright?” Olivia nodded smiling brightly looking at her Mama before leaning forward keeping her arms wrapped around her Mama’s neck. As Lexa looked over at Raven she smiled when Raven sent her a thankful look and a nod, winking at her sister so she knew it was fine. “Ok then that’s settled, let’s go home…. Auntie Raven can finish here seeing as my princess saved the day…” Smiling Lexa stood up picking her daughter up into the air and onto her chest, looking over to Raven she asked “That ok?”

 

“Yeah sure, it’ll only take me ten……and it is only fair after Livy over there saved the day” Raven smiled standing up and moving over to her twin and her niece, leaning down slightly she placed a kiss on Olivia’s cheek “See you soon trouble”

 

“See you soon Auntie Rae” Olivia sweetly responded smiling at her auntie before resting her head on her Mama’s shoulder, her hands resting in between her Mama’s and her chest.

 

“See you later Lex”

 

“Uh huh…. If you need more help give me a shout”

 

“Will do”

 

“Good…. see you later” Lexa responded before smiling at her sister before turning and walking towards the door holding Olivia in her arms, opening the door and walking through it she walked towards the car park passing a few of her employees as she did. Stopping off at reception area she looked down at Maya the receptionist softly saying “Can you make sure my sister doesn’t stay too late please?”

 

“Sure thing Miss Woods”

 

“Maya what did we say about that?”

 

“Sorry…. Sure thing Lexa”

 

“No need to apologise….and thank you very much” Walking towards the door she turned back smiling at Maya “Have a good evening Maya” She happily said pushing the door open walking through it and to the car smiling when she heard Maya return the sentiment of wishing her a good evening. Pulling her keys out of her pocket she unlocked the car opening the back door, placing her daughter into the kids seat in the back she smiled when Olivia looked up sadly at her “It’s only until we get back to Mama’s and then we can cuddle more”

 

“All night Mama?”

 

“If you want princess…...Once we get home we’ll have some dinner, then get you into your pyjamas then we can call Mommy and Oscar to say goodnight”

 

“Can we watch a movie Mama?”

 

“Of course, how about we watch the jungle book? Because we didn’t get to watch it earlier did we”

 

“I love the jungle book Mama”

 

“I know you do baby” Lexa smiled leaning forward kissing her daughter on the forehead gently before placing the seatbelt across her daughter making sure it was on properly and safely. Closing the door, she got in the driver’s seat quickly starting the engine and putting on some music for Olivia who started bopping her head up and down to the music as Lexa pulled the car out of the car park and drove towards her apartment.


	4. Phonecalls

** CHAPTER FOUR-Phone Calls **

Wood’s Family House (18:15)

Clarke re-entered the living room with her phone in her hand placing it in her pocket after having left it in the kitchen, she smiled when she noticed Oscar sitting up waiting for her to restart the movie still dressed in Lexa’s jacket his lower body covered in the duvet that was still on the couch. This was the third time in a row that they had watched the film today, she sat down next to him again smiling when he shuffled towards her bring his head to rest on her chest as he brought his legs to lay on Clarke’s thighs. Bringing the covers back over them both Clarke lifted her son onto her lap wrapping her arms around him. Looking down at her son’s face as he looked up at her patiently for his Mommy to press play and restart his favourite film. Clarke laughed down at her son’s expression, when all of a sudden he started laughing softly;

 

“What are you laughing at my prince?”

 

“Your buzzing Mommy”

 

“Am I?” Clarke asked guessing her phone must have been going off without her realising or feeling it. Oscar nodded his head at his Mommy’s question continuing to laugh at the sensation. Reaching into her pocket and under her son’s leg she pulled her phone out of her pocket, looking at the message seeing it was from Lexa, she couldn’t help but smile, it had been a long time since Lexa texted her randomly. “It’s from Mama” She told her son looking down at him while the smile spread across his face

 

“Can I see Mommy?”

 

“Just let me read it first then you can see” Clarke sweetly said to her son as he shuffled closer to her chest keeping the covers wrapped around himself. Unlocking her phone, she pulled up Lexa’s message reading it: **Lexa: Can I call you later? Olivia wants to say goodnight to you & I wanna say night to Oscar **Clarke smiled at the message even though it wasn’t about her in general the message showed that Lexa still cared about her enough to ask her before just doing something. She thought over what to say back but before she had a chance to speak she felt Oscar’s hands on the wrist of the hand that was holding her phone, seeing her son’s eyes peering over her phone;

 

“What’s it say Mommy?”

 

“It says that Mama wants to call us later”

 

“Really Mommy?”

 

“Yes…. she wants to say goodnight to you…. isn’t that great?”

 

“It’s awesome Mommy” Oscar looked at her wide eyed at his Mommy before he asked “When mommy?”

 

“When is Mama gonna call?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mommy “Why don’t I ask her?” Oscar nodded his head again at his Mommy “Ok then let’s ask” She added lifting her arm over Oscar so that the phone was resting in her hands on her son’s lap. Letting him watch as she typed out a message to Lexa

 

 **Clarke: Oscar wants to know what time your gonna call?** Before she had a chance to stop him Oscar’s hands were on the phone typing out another message to Lexa, pressing the send button before Clarke could edit the message for him **Clarke: hhhiiihiihih mmammamm** Clarke read the message laughing at what her son had messaged Lexa, typing out another message she quickly sent it **Clarke: That was Oscar he wanted to say Hi Mama…well I think he did anyway** She waited patiently for Lexa to respond as she pressed play on the Blu Ray remote restarting the jungle book for her son. A minute or so later she smiled when she felt her phone go off turning her attention down to her phone;

 

**Lexa: Olivia is just eating her dinner then she’ll call so about 10 minutes**

**Lexa: lol he got all the right letters lol Tell him I said Hi Bubba**

“Mama says ‘Hi Bubba’ and she’s gonna call in 10 minutes” Oscar turned his attention back to his Mommy turned to face her again “You wanna say something back?” Oscar nodded his head reaching for the phone “How about you tell me and I’ll type it for you”

 

“Can I press send Mommy?”

 

“Of course you can…. now what do you wanna say to Mama?”

 

“Tell Mama……I love her a million bazillion stars….and I miss her”

 

“Ok baby” Clarke responded at the boy’s sweet words before turning her attention to the phone and typing **Clarke: He says he loves you a million bazillion stars…and he misses you** Clarke held the phone steady for Oscar looking at him and say “You can send it now baby” Oscar’s face filled with excitement as her reached his hand up giggling before pressing the send button, looking up at Clarke after a second:

 

“Is it sent Mommy?”

 

Clarke looked at her phone double checking before she responded “Yeah baby, it’s all sent. Now we just have to wait for Mama to call” She completed kissing Oscar on the top of his head bringing her free hand up to brush through her son’s hair. He smiled leaning his head against her chest

 

“I miss Mama”

 

“Me too baby….me too” Clarke honestly replied wrapping her arms around her son holding him close to her chest, she hadn’t realised it until now but she hadn’t cuddle with Oscar for such a long time, it dawned on her now that she was spending way too much time with Roan and the twins at the same time. In the eight months she’d been apart from Lexa she’d only been alone for one, all the others Roan had been there every day in some way shape or form. And now he wasn’t here she had to admit it was better, not having him hugging her all the time and always trying to kiss her. She knew that she only let it go on because she was scared of being on her own after being with Lexa since they were teenagers, but now she knew she had to stop it. She had to worry about the twins and nobody else and if that meant breaking up with Roan, even though she didn’t feel they were a couple, was what she had to do.

 

Her and Oscar turned their attention back to the film continuing to watch The Jungle Book smiling as Oscar’s attention went back to the film and he started wiggling on her lap along with the film. As they continued to watch the film Clarke kept an eye on the time as it began to fly by, the ten minutes Lexa had mentioned had come and gone and it was now 18:30 and was already past the time she would put the twin’s down to sleep, she knew that right now that the likelihood of Oscar going to sleep right now was very low, his attention was solely on the film playing on the TV in front of them as he waited to speak to his Mama. She was starting to get a little worried when her phone began vibrating, looking at the caller ID she smiled seeing Lexa’s name come up as **Wifey** She was sure she’d changed it but still was happy to see the nickname appear sliding her finger on the screen she held the phone to her ear;

 

“Hi Lex” As soon as the words left Clarke’s mouth Oscar’s head spun quickly his attention turning instantly to his Mommy

 

“Is it Mama?”

 

“Ok Lex, put her on…. Don’t worry I’ll tell him” Clarke responded seeing Oscar’s attention was solely on her, smiling and looking down at him she relayed the message Lexa had asked her too. “Mama said she’s gonna talk to you in a minute…after Olivia talks to me…ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy” Oscar sweetly responded resting his head against Clarke’s chest half his attention on Clarke’s phone call and the other half on The Jungle Book as it continued to play on the TV.

 

Clarke waited patiently on the phone for Olivia to come on the other end, she’d heard Lexa call their daughter then tell her that Olivia was brushing her teeth. She was only waiting for a minute or two when she heard the phone shuffle and she heard her daughters breathless voice

 

“Hi Mommy”

 

“Hi Princess...how’s my little girl doing?”

 

“I’m good Mommy….me and Mama had dinner and it was really nice”

 

“Really what did you have?”

 

“Mama made her special pasta and chicken”

 

“The spicy one?”

 

“No…Mama said I’m too young for Spicy food”

 

“Mama is right, isn’t she?”

 

“Yeah” There was a second of silence on the phone before Olivia spoke excitedly “What did you have Mommy?”

 

“Me and Oscar had some soup and some bread…. Oscar’s still not feeling very well”

 

“Will he be ok Mommy?”

 

“Of course he’ll be fine baby”

 

“Ok Mommy”

 

“Did you remember to brush your teeth baby?”

 

“I did Mommy, Mama timed me”

 

“How long did you brush them for?”

 

“Five minutes…just like you said to right Mommy?”

 

“Right princess, so what are you gonna do now?”

 

“Me and Mama are gonna watch the Jungle Book, right Mama?” Clarke smiled to herself imagining Olivia asking her Mama, and of course her Mama’s nod of confirmation, she heard Olivia laugh softly as she spoke “Mama said yes”

 

“Of course she did…Mama loves the Jungle Book”

 

“Guess what Mommy?”

 

“What baby?”

 

“I'm wearing my princess pyjamas Mommy, like a real princess does”

 

“That's because you are a real princess”

 

“And Mama warmed them up Mommy so they were warm”

 

“Good as long as Mama is looking after our princess”

 

“She is Mommy….” Olivia went silent for a few seconds before she spoke again lowering her voice slightly “Mommy?”

 

“Yes”

 

“When I come home, can I call Mama?”

 

“How do you mean princess?”

 

“To say goodnight…I don’t want Mama to be lonely”

 

“You wanna call Mama every night to say goodnight so she doesn’t get lonely?”

 

“And so I don’t miss her…...please Mommy”

 

“Olivia, I can’t say yes now but I promise me and Mama will talk about it”

 

“Ok…. Thank you Mommy”

 

“Your welcome” When a yawn came down the line Clarke smiled brightly before softly saying “You tired baby?”

 

“Uh huh…. Mama let me help fix the music it was hard Mommy and then we played with my dolls and then Mama tickled me loads and now I’m tired”

 

“I’m not surprised you’ve had a big day princess” Clarke smiled as she heard Olivia yawn again “How about I say goodnight then Oscar and Mama can talk, then you can go to sleep?”

 

“Ok Mommy”

 

“Good girl…...Goodnight princess”

 

“Goodnight Mommy…. I love you”

 

“I love you too baby girl” Clarke smiled as she heard a ruffle on the other end of the phone hearing Olivia’s voice say ‘It’s mommy Mama’ she smiled a little more when she heard Lexa giggle softly as she took the phone.

 

“Hello”

 

“Hey Lex…. I’ll put Oscar on now”

 

“Thank you Clarke”

 

“No problem….” She softly responded gently running her hand through Oscar’s hair gaining his attention “Oscar…. Mama is on the phone” Oscar quickly turned around holding his hand out for the phone, Clarke laughed handing the phone to her son watching as he placed the phone to his ear and jumped off of her lap and crawled one handed across the couch until he was in the corner of the couch sitting curled up in his Mama’s leather jacket. As he excitedly started talking to his Mama kicking his legs up and down a few times in pure excitement as Clarke placed the duvet over his legs;

 

“Hi Mama”

 

“Hi my little prince”

 

“What are you doing Mama?”

 

“I’m talking to you, silly billy” Lexa’s sentence made Oscar giggled out loudly looking at Clarke laughing as he explained

 

“Mama’s funny”

 

“Oh am I mister?” Lexa asked down the line having heard Oscar’s words to his Mommy

 

“Yes Mama you are…. what are you really doing Mama?”

 

“I’m just cuddling with Olivia and we’re watching the Jungle Book”

 

“Me and Mommy are watching Jungle book Mama” Oscar excitedly let out as he looked at his Mommy laughing  


“wow that's cool…...are you and Mommy cuddling as well?”

 

“Not right now”

 

“Why not mister? I thought you wanted Mommy cuddles”

 

Oscar turned his attention to his Mommy letting the phone drop from his ear slightly moving onto his knees he looked at Clarke saying “Come on Mommy cuddle time” The order of sorts made Clarke smile and let out a single giggle before she laid herself down on the couch next to her son. Smiling when he laid down next to her shuffling his back into her chest, he paused for a second reaching down pulling the covers up so they covered him and his Mommy “Me and Mommy are cuddling Mama”

 

“Good you know Mommy likes cuddles”

 

“Yeah”

 

"So where in the film are you?” Lexa started as Oscar began to explain the film to her in massive detail as he always did, he continued to explain as the film continued on. Lexa didn’t interrupt her son she just let him go on explaining everything to her as Olivia curled into her side and the film played on in front of them. As the film reached the King Louie Song she smiled as she listened to Oscar tiredly continue to explain as his voice got more and more tired until he eventually fell asleep. She knew he’d fallen asleep from his level breathing and the small snore he’d inherited from Clarke, the same snore she teased Clarke about all the time when they were together. She could have hung up but right now she enjoyed listening to the sound of her son’s level breathing, it brought a natural smile to her face thinking about the image of her son sleeping peacefully cuddled up to his Mommy. As she looked down at Olivia she smiled as she looked at her daughter, curled up into her side in her princess pyjamas her hands clinging to her Mama’s top. Reaching over her daughter carefully she pulled the duvet Olivia had brought out of her bedroom, pulling it up the couch until it was covering her daughter. As she let go of the duvet over Olivia she heard Clarke’s voice over the phone, turning her attention back to the phone call “Hello”

 

“Hey”

 

“Hey…sorry did you say something? I was placing the duvet over Liv and zoned out a little”

 

“I was just saying Oscar’s fast asleep”

 

“I thought so, I heard that cute mini snore. You know the one I mean”

 

“The one you think he inherited from me”

 

“The one I know he inherited from you”

 

“I do not snore Lexa”

 

“You do Clarke”

 

“I don’t”

 

“Clarke trust me you do…I listened to that adorable snore for ten years”

 

“Adorable huh?”

 

“Oh yeah in a loud sometimes sleep depriving kind of way”

 

“Whatever…. I kept you awake numerous ways……and my snoring so you say wasn’t one of them”

 

“Someone sounds a little too defensive” Lexa laughed out hearing Clarke’s soft laugh on the other end of the phone. This was something she’d missed, just normal conversation between her and Clarke, no arguing and no accusations jus them walking like they used to

 

“I’m just reaffirming that I’m right and your wrong”

 

“Sure you are Clarke”

 

“What I am…. you know I am”

 

“I know nothing of the sort”

 

Lexa quickly retorted as the two of them feel into a comfortable conversation, talking for minutes on end, those minutes soon enough turned into hours. They spoke about numerous things about their past together, times when Lexa thought she was right and times where Clarke thought she was right. Both of them felt so relaxed and calm just talking to each other, it was something they hadn’t done since they decided that Lexa should move out, since that moment since that conversation Lexa had been mostly cold to Clarke. Shutting her out not understanding why Clarke couldn’t just take her word over someone else’s. They had been talking for about Two hours and Thirty minutes when Lexa’s attention was brought away from the phone call and to Olivia as her daughter wriggled and stirred slightly as she was about to say something to Clarke, the Blonde spoke first;

 

“I’m gonna have to go…...Oscar is stirring and I need to get him to take his medicine”

 

“Me too…. just minus the medicine and replaced with Olivia” Lexa laughed out softly, as she watched her daughter’s eyes slowly open and look up at her “I’ll see you in a few days Clarke”

 

“Yeah…see you soon Lex”

 

Lexa smiled as she hung up the phone turning her attention back to her daughter, just as Olivia was sitting up rubbing her eyes tears beginning to spill from them as a sob began to form in her mouth. Lexa quickly lifted her up and onto her lap wrapping her arms around her, she placed a kiss on her daughter’s forehead soothingly rubbing her daughter’s back. “What’s wrong baby?” Seeing the sad expression on Olivia’s face she softly smiled reaching her left hand up and gently stroking her daughter’s hair, removing the hairband that had been placed in Olivia’s hair earlier. Remembering what Olivia had said to her earlier about dreaming about her she smiled leaning down kissing Olivia’s forehead again placing a few more kisses in a row before she softly said “You’re not dreaming princess”

 

“Mama is here”

 

“Well…we’re in Mama’s apartment so of course I’m here” Lexa softly responded smiling as Olivia giggled softly into her chest. “Did you have another dream with Mama in it?” Olivia nodded her head at the question making Lexa sadly smile “Well I promise you you’re not dreaming; Mama is real” Olivia looked up at her reaching her right hand up gently touching Lexa’s cheek as if she was making sure Lexa was indeed real. Lexa watched her daughter continue to gently touch her face, gently bringing her fingers up and down on her cheek. As Olivia continued with the motion for a few seconds before Lexa quickly turned her face making a num-num sound as if she was trying to eat her daughters hand, the sound and action had the desired effect she wanted as Olivia quickly removed her hand letting out a massive laugh burying her head in Lexa’s chest. Lexa laughed along quickly bringing her hands to Olivia’s stomach tickling her stomach softly making her daughter laugh even more. She continued tickling her daughter for a few minutes until her arms began hurting slightly, wrapping her arms around Olivia sitting back up with her daughter in her arms, looking down at Olivia she softly asked “I know normally you don’t get to choose but…seeing as you’re a little upset would you like to go to bed in your room watching a film or would you like to stay up and watch TV with Mama?”

 

“In Mama’s room?” Olivia asked looking up at her Mama

 

“Yes in Mama’s room”

 

“Can I watch a film with you Mama?”

 

“Of course you can baby girl…...but tomorrow you have to sleep in your room ok?”

 

“I promise Mama”

 

“Good Girl” Lexa smiled placing Olivia on the floor allowing her to stand herself up, as she did she looked down at Olivia smiling “Why don’t you go and pick a film from Mama’s collection?” She watched as Olivia let out a small gasp and giggle before running off in the direction her bedroom was. As she walked towards her bedroom she smiled and giggled to herself as she listened to Olivia’s excited giggles as the little girl let out occasional words as she tried to decide what film she wanted to watch.

 

 

** Wood’s Family House **

Clarke returned to the living room walking a little quicker than she normally would as she heard her son’s cries coming from the room. Quickly closing the space between her and her son she sat back down on the couch removing Lexa’s jacket from Oscar’s body before lifting him onto her lap so she was cradling him slightly as he softly said ‘Hurts mommy’ she soothingly rubbed his back telling him she knew. After minutes of calming Oscar down she was relieved when Oscar’s crying stopped, she was beginning to think that calling Lexa was the only option, usually when the twins’ were sick Lexa would be the one to deal with them and cuddle with them and give them their medicine, Lexa had always had a high immune system in fact in the whole ten years she’d known Lexa the brunette had only been sick on three different occasions. It wasn’t that she couldn’t handle them being sick it was more that Lexa seemed to bring the twin’s comfort when they were sick and that was what everyone needed when they were sick. Looking down at Oscar she noticed the small smile on her son’s face as he reached up resting his hand on her cheek his fingers tapping ever so gently on her cheek as he softly said;

 

“Mommy’s pretty”

 

“Thank you my prince” Clarke responded leaning down and placing a gentle kiss on his forehead feeling how hot and clammy his forehead was “Time for some more medicine”

 

“Make me better Mommy?”

 

“It will baby I promise…. It’ll take the pain away….and it’ll make it a little easier to sleep”

 

“And Mommy cuddles”

 

“Exactly medicine and Mommy cuddles will make you all better” She smiled carefully lifting her son up a little so his was sitting up straight, keeping her arms around him gently she undid the bottle pouring the medicine onto the spoon she held it over her son’s mouth smiling as he opened his mouth allowing her to give him the medicine without a fight unlike earlier. As Oscar swallowed the medicine he made a small mmm sound as Clarke looked down at him “Does it taste good?”

 

“Like strawberries”

 

“Strawberries are nice aren’t they?”

 

“Yeah, but Livia can’t have them Mommy”

 

“No she can’t and nor can Mama, can she?”

 

“No because they make them sick”

 

“Yeah, but that just means more for me and you don’t it baby?”

 

“Yes mommy”

 

“Good….so how about Mommy puts this back in the kitchen and then me and you can have cuddle time” Oscar nodded his head but didn’t release his hold on his Mommy, simply looking up at her with a sad expression “You wanna stay with Mommy?” Oscar nodded his head at the question resting his head on Clarke’s chest “Ok then” She smiled switching her son around so they were chest to chest making it easier for her to carry him into the kitchen. Standing up she walked towards the kitchen carrying her son against her chest, placing the medicine in the cupboard it belonged in, she turned around walking back into the living room looking at the TV and the couch walking forwards she picked up the remote turning the TV off before softly asking “Do you wanna sleep in your room tonight? Or do you wanna sleep with Mommy tonight?”

 

Oscar lifted his head up looking at his Mommy before her softly asked “Can I have mommy cuddles in Mommy’s bed?”

 

“Of course, I wouldn’t offer if you couldn’t would I?” Oscar shook his head at his Mommy “Well then, you wanna sleep in Mommy’s room tonight?”

 

“Yes please mommy”

 

"Ok then let's get to bed shall we?” Oscar nodded his head going back to resting his head on his Mommy’s shoulder looking behind her as Clarke began walking up the stairs Oscar let out a small cry

 

“No Mommy”

 

Clarke instantly stopped what she was doing looking at her son “What's wrong baby boy?”

 

“Mama’s Jacket mommy”

 

“You can leave it there; it'll be safe”

 

“No mommy, Mama said I could look after it, so I have to”

 

“Ok we’ll take it upstairs with us ok?”

 

Oscar nodded his head softly leaning forward and kissing Clarke on the cheek “Thank you mommy”

 

“Your welcome baby, I know you love Mama’s jacket” Clarke smiled before walking down the few steps she had climbed walking back across the living room to the couch picking up Lexa’s jacket she draped it over her son’s back before moving her right arm so the jacket was between her arm and her son’s back, letting out a small smile as the smell of Lexa’s perfume hit her. Turning she walked back towards the stairs ready to climb them and go straight to her bedroom, laying cuddled up with her son watching a film the only thing on her mind at the moment.

 


	5. A Woods Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, 
> 
> Just wanted to say a Quick Thank You to everyone that reads this story, and to everyone that has left a comment :-) I really appreciate you all taking the time out to do either :-) 
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter.

** CHAPTER FIVE-A Woods Day **

Three days later (Saturday Morning)

It was 9am in the morning, Clarke and Oscar were eating their breakfast at the kitchen table. Oscar’s attention was on the clock, the back of his legs hitting the back of his chair as he swung them excitedly, knowing that is Mama was due to pick him up when the big hand was on the 9. Over the last few days Oscar had gotten better, the medicine and Clarke’s cuddles seemed to making all the difference for him, he was still a little sick last night but to Clarke’s surprised she’d woken up to her son’s face smiling down at her not one bit of illness noticeable to his mommy other than a small sniffle. Clarke stood up walking over to the sink and washing her bowl out as she was washing the bowl she heard the doorbell ring through the house, seeing Oscar’s face fill with an excited look as he went to stand up and leave his breakfast. Clarke quickly placed the bowl down gently in the sink looking over at Oscar and firmly saying;

 

“Don’t you dare move young man…… you eat your breakfast” Clarke pointed to Oscar two and a half remaining pieces of Nutella on toast, seeing the small frown threatening to escape her son’s face she added “I’ll bring Mama through I promise” Clarke laughed when the smile quickly appeared on her son’s face again as she walked towards the door, wiping her hands on her jeans she unlocked the door opening it revealing Lexa standing at the door with Olivia in her arms, the little girls face was buried in her Mama’s neck her hair down and messily covering her face still dressed in her pyjamas “Come in” Clarke softly added stepping aside for her ex and their daughter, once they were inside Clarke closed the door behind them locking it again, she turned noticing the Lexa had gone straight to the couch sitting herself down with Olivia, as she walked closer to Lexa her ex softly spoke;

 

“Olivia isn’t feeling very well; I think she caught Oscar’s flu”

 

“Oh my poor baby” Clarke let out moving forward brushing Olivia’s messy hair out of her face, only for her daughter to shuffle further into her Mama’s arms, the movement worried her slightly causing Lexa to place a soothing hand on Clarke’s shoulder explaining

 

“The light’s hurt her eyes that’s why she had her hair like that….and she hasn’t let go of me since she woke up this morning” Lexa explained looking down at Olivia and gently placing a kiss on her forehead replacing Olivia’s hair over her face, a content sigh coming from the little girl as she did so, looking up at Clarke she continued “I only had a little of her medicine left, have you got any here?”

 

“Yeah in the cupboard in the kitchen…I’ll get it for you”

 

“No it’s ok…. you take Olivia, I wanna say hello to Oscar first” Lexa softly retorted seeing the worried look on Clarke’s face as she looked down at their daughter. Nodding her head for Clarke to sit on the couch next to her, as Clarke sat herself down worriedly next to her she looked down at Olivia softly saying “You want Mommy cuddles, Liv?” Olivia slowly nodded her head at the question making Lexa smile, placing a small kiss on Olivia’s cheek “I’m gonna pass you to Mommy, and then get you some medicine to make you feel better” Lexa stood herself up carefully she manoeuvred Olivia around in her arms before placing Olivia in Clarke’s arms making sure Olivia’s hair was covering her face stopping the light from hurting her eyes. She smiled as Clarke shuffled backwards with their daughter in her arms, bringing her knees up onto the couch slightly allowing her to cradle their daughter a little more, placing small kisses on Olivia’s forehead and cheek making a small smile appear on their daughter’s face.

 

Lexa turned her attention to the kitchen walking the door, then through it seeing Oscar sitting at the kitchen table eating his final piece of toast. As he saw his Mama he excitedly dropped the toast letting out a gasp before going to stand up. “Nah Uh…you stay there mister” Lexa firmly let out before leaning forward and walking towards her son placing a kiss on his cheek before walking before him and hugging his back gently. “Good Morning Baby boy”

 

“Morning Mama” Oscar let out trying again to stand up and move from his chair

 

“Oscar, stay in your seat…we can cuddle after ok…you need to eat your breakfast…” When Oscar looked up at her giving her a sad frown she added “Olivia isn’t very well, so I have to get her medicine for her…then I’ll come and sit with you ok?” Oscar nodded his head “Ok…. if your finished your toast when I come back then Mama may even let you have some of her special tea” She laughed softly at the gasp that escaped her son’s mouth as he went back to eating his toast. Lexa walked over to the cupboard she knew held the medicine that she needed, opening it up she found Olivia’s medicine on the opposite side of the shelve that Oscar’s medicine was. Picking up the medicine she got a spoon from the cutlery draw and walked back into the living room seeing Clarke sitting on the couch still holding their daughter, only now Clarke had tears running down her cheeks.

 

Moving forward and sitting down on Clarke’s right hand side, she reached up without a second thought wiping away the tears on Clarke’s cheeks. She could see Clarke’s eyes were filled with worry and panic, and from what she could tell a hint of guilt. She reassuringly placed her hand on Clarke’s right thigh soothingly saying “She’s gonna be fine Clarke”

 

“We should have seen she was sick…...I should have seen it”

 

“Clarke she was fine until this morning”

 

“We don’t know that, she could have been hiding it…. all my attention was on Oscar and not her I should have been paying more attention to her”

 

“I know it’s scary seeing her like this, but you know what she’s like when she’s sick Clarke…. she doesn’t talk she just sleeps and cuddles with one of us…. she doesn’t even talk or cuddle Oscar”

 

“She could be seriously ill Lex”

 

“Clarke……. Your panicking and I understand why but you’ve seen her sick before…. she’s the same as she always is….”

 

“She doesn’t hide from the light like this Lexa”

 

“Clarke…you are being your mother right now”

 

Clarke looked at Lexa letting out a small breath as she realised that Lexa was right, she was doing what her mother used to do and jumping to the worse possible scenario that she could. She’d always had a habit of doing this when it came to the twins, and everytime Lexa would have to talk her down and calm her down at the same time. Clarke looked at her softly nodding her head and smiling “I know…I’m sorry”

 

“You don’t need to apologise…. you worry, I don’t blame you Clarke. You should have seen me this morning I was terrified especially when she didn’t let go of me…not even for me to get changed or to let me drive”

 

“Really?”

 

“Of course…. she’s always so bubbly and happy, so when she’s sick it scares me to see her being the opposite” Softly smiling at Clarke she looked down at Olivia smiling as she noticed the little girl peaking up at Clarke smiling as her hand played with the end of Clarke’s loose hair “I think she may have just wanted her Mommy” She motioned with her head, which caused Clarke to look down at Olivia seeing the smile she leant down kissing Olivia on the cheek softly

 

“Hey princess” Smiling down at her daughter she softly continued “Mama just got your special medicine, so I’m gonna give you some now ok?” Olivia softly nodded her head at her Mommy her lips moving slightly but her voice so low that neither of them could hear, leaning down placing her ear closer to her daughter’s mouth “What was that baby?”

 

Clarke sat up smiling down at her daughter before looking at Lexa and smiling “She said Thank you” She smiled softly and letting out a single laugh looking back to Olivia “Your welcome princess…now let’s give you this medicine so you can get better”

 

Lexa smiled at the blonde and their daughter before standing up “I’m gonna check on Oscar while you look after our princess” Clarke nodded at her as she began opening the medicine that Lexa had given her. Lexa turned around and walked back into the kitchen seeing Oscar sitting patiently on the chair she had left him in. Walking forward she stopped at the left side of the table next to her son looking down at his plate she noticed there wasn’t a single bit of toast left on the plate. Smiling at her son she held her arms up in the air seeing the smile and excitement fill her son’s face, she watched as he stood up on the chair and jumped forward into his Mama’s arms, who caught him with ease thanks to the closeness of them. She smiled even more when Oscar wrapped his arms tightly around her and rested his head on her shoulders. She hugged her son for a few minutes before he lifted his head up and looked at her asking;

 

“Was I good boy Mama?”

 

“You were my prince…...a very good boy”

 

“Yay” Oscar excitedly let out throwing his arms up in the air and smiling at his Mama, his hands came down to gently hold his Mama’s face at the bottom of her “Special tea now Mama?”

 

“That was the deal wasn't it?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“Ok then, let's put the kettle on”

 

“Yes” Oscar let out making Lexa laugh even more, carrying her son over to the counter she sat him carefully on it as she lifted the kettle to the sink filling it up with water, returning it to where it normally rested she flicked the switch down standing back in front of her son. She smiled as his hands moved to her shirt and his finger began to trace the outline of the pattern on her shirt, as he reached her stomach he looked up at her thoughtfully before speaking “Mommy tea?”

 

“I don’t know…. should we go ask her?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama, holding his arms in the air signalling he wanted to be carried and not walk. Lexa obliged lifting her son from the counter onto her chest before turning and walking out of the kitchen and into the living room where she found Clarke and Olivia in the midst of a conversation. Smiling softly as she noticed Olivia’s left hand was resting on Clarke’s chin softly, Clarke looked up as she heard Lexa’s footsteps on the floor.

 

“Olivia was just telling me about your movie nights”

 

“She was?”

 

“Yep she was telling me how you were watching Disney films”

 

“We were, we watched all her favourites and Mommy’s favourite of course”

 

“Oh she didn’t tell me that…. you watched Sleeping beauty?” Clarke asked looking down at Olivia as the little girl softly responded to her, still only loud enough for the both of them to hear “You think Mommy is Sleeping Beauty?” Olivia softly nodded her head at the question “Does that mean Mama is my prince?” Olivia shook her head this time “No then who gives me a kiss to wake me up?” Clarke couldn’t help but smile when she heard Olivia’s answer, she looked up at Lexa smiling brightly as she said “Olivia says Oscar is my Prince Charming”

 

“I think she’s right…what do you think Oscar?” Lexa softly asked looking at her son who had a massive smile on his small face

 

“Yeah…...Mommy calls me her prince….so I am Mommy’s prince”

 

“Well as long as we all agree……. but then who’s gonna be Mama’s prince?”

 

“Me Mama”

 

“Your mine and Mommy’s prince?”

 

“Yes Mama…. I’ll protect you and Mommy”

 

“You will?”

 

“Always Mama”

 

“Thank you my little prince”

 

“Your welcome Mama” Oscar smiled back leaning up wrapping his arms around his Mama’s neck and squeezing tightly as he lovingly placed a kiss on her neck like he always did. He rested his head on Lexa’s shoulder looking at his Mommy and asking her “You want tea Mommy?” Lexa and Clarke smiled at their son as Clarke softly answered him

 

“I don’t want tea baby…. but I would love a coffee”

 

“Can you help me Mama?” Oscar asked Lexa looking up at her not knowing what coffee was nor how it was made. At least with tea he knew that you put in water and a teabag and then it tasted nice

 

“Of course I can baby”

 

“Thank you……ok Mommy I’ll make you a cough me” Clarke laughed at her son’s attempt to say the word she had said moments before “Livy…. would you like a drink?” He lovingly asked looking at his twin sister watching as their mommy spoke to the little girl

 

“She said can she have some Orange juice please”

 

“Ok Livy…. we’ll be back with the drinks in a minute Mommy” Oscar smiled out looking up as his Mama as if telling her that she should walk into the kitchen again. Lexa laughed at the look and nodded her head at her son before turning and walking towards the kitchen again setting about making the drinks under her son’s watchful eye.

 

* * *

 

**- Ten Minutes Later-**

Oscar walked into the living room carrying his sister’s Sippy cup filled with Orange juice, Lexa had opted to make the juice in Olivia’s old Sippy cup so that her daughter could lay on the couch or with her or Clarke, and still be able to drink whenever she wanted to without spilling the drink, thanks to the closable tip of the cup. Lexa followed her son into the living room holding her tea and Clarke’s coffee and either of her hands, when she got close enough to the table she placed Clarke’s coffee on it carefully moving the table closer to her ex with her free hand, once the table was close enough to Clarke, Lexa turned around and sat herself down on the corner part of the couch shuffling herself back so her back was pressed into the corner comfortably. She smiled as she watched Oscar place Olivia’s cup onto the table next to Clarke’s coffee, as he removed his hands from the cup he stood himself back up looking at his Mama smiling brightly giggling then running over to her, climbing up onto the couch sitting himself down next to his Mama, in-between Clarke and Lexa’s bodies as he sat down more he shuffled over to his Mama more resting his hands softly on her thigh. Looking up at his Mama he patiently waited for her to give him some of her tea as she always did.

They sat there in silence for a few minutes before Lexa noticed the remote controls and reached forward picking them turning the TV on making sure that the volume wasn’t too loud. Turning on the Blu-Ray she smiled when Jungle Book played on the TV continuing from where Clarke and Oscar had left it the night before. Oscar’s attention instantly went to the playing film as Olivia shifted slightly in Clarke’s arms. Lexa smiled as Oscar climbed absentmindedly onto her lap, moving her cup out of the way so she didn’t burn her son. She watched on amused, as did Clarke, as their son stretched his legs out half on his Mama’s thighs and half on the couch, once his legs were comfortably placed he leant himself backwards so his back was against Lexa’s chest. Comfortably relaxing into his Mama as he kept his attention on the TV playing his favourite film. Lexa’s attention was kept on her son when he laughed and pulled at his Mama’s free arm, wrapping it around himself. Bringing her cup of mint tea down to her mouth she sipped the drink carefully finding that it was now cool enough for her son to drink, she carefully lowered the cup in front of her and Oscar, smiling when her son softly leant forward his hands coming up to the cup one resting on top of Lexa’s hand, he leant forward slowly sipping the drink before letting out a small ‘mmmm’ sound laughing and look up at his Mama;

 

“It’s Mint Mama”

 

“I know it is my prince” Lexa smiled out as Oscar took another sip of her drink, looking over to Clarke she softly smiled as her ex spoke

 

“I think you’ve lost your drink Lex”

 

“I think so yeah” Clarke looked down at Olivia seeing that she was looking for Lexa having heard her voice, seeing the look Lexa held on tightly to the cup shuffling herself over toward Clarke so their thighs were pressed together, placing her cup on the table in front of Clarke as she heard Oscar’s laugh at the movement, then leaning over Clarke so that Olivia could see her partially “Hey princess” She smiled out leaning down and kissing Olivia on the forehead;

 

“Hi Mama”

 

“Hi baby…. it’s so good to hear your voice”

 

“You too Mama”

 

“Oh yeah…. you like Mama’s voice?” Olivia nodded her head at Lexa smiling at her Mama softly “Good cause I like your voice” Lexa soothingly said as she reached up and stroked Olivia’s hair softly

 

“That’s nice Mama”

 

“It is…. well I’ll keep doing it then” Lexa smiled leaning forward kissing Olivia on the forehead before going back to stroking her daughter’s hair, she was so lost in her thoughts she missed what Olivia said next “What was that baby?”

 

“Stay Mama”

 

Lexa looked at Clarke before she attempted to answer, getting a nod from her ex she smiled brightly looking back to their daughter “Like I could ever leave my princess when she’s sick”

 

“And me Mama” Oscar interjected his hand resting on Lexa’s collarbone as he looked up at her with slightly sad eyes. Seeing the look Lexa lifted her son up so he was chest to chest with her, their faces now closer than moments ago

 

“Of course…I could never leave either of my babies when they needed me”

 

“And Mommy?”

 

“And Mommy too…...if any of you need me then I’ll be right here…. because that is Mama’s job” Lexa smiled when Oscar leant forward letting a little ‘yay’ out as he hugged her tightly resting his head on her chest and turning his attention back to the TV and the film that was playing “You tired baby?” Lexa asked placing a kiss on the side of Oscar’s head smiling when he nodded his head, his small hands gripping onto Lexa’s top;

 

“He woke up at 6:30, he refused to go back to sleep because his Mama was coming and he needed to look like…. what was it Oz?”

 

“Like a perfect Prince Mommy” Oscar answered not moving from his position on his Mama’s chest “Look Mama” Oscar softly said pointing to the TV screen and Lexa’s favourite scene in the film ‘King Louie’s Song’ Lexa smiled even more as she heard Oscar singing along to some of the words in the song. She looked at Clarke seeing the smile on her face, one she knew matched her own at this present moment. Lifting her feet onto the couch she relaxed herself allowing her son to relax against her a little more. Enjoying the time, they were getting to spend together as a family, something they hadn’t done for a while. She watched as Clarke switched Olivia around in her arms so they little girl could see the TV, Olivia smiled seeing her Mama reaching her legs out to rest on Lexa’s thighs as her upper body and her butt rested on Clarke, with Clarke’s arms still protectively wrapped around her. Olivia reached one of her hands forward grabbing for her Mama’s hand, feeling the motion Lexa moved her hand reaching and taking hold of Olivia’s seeing the smile spread across the sick little girl’s face.

 

* * *

 

**-Two hours later-**

Lexa woke up suddenly, looking around the room looking around the room a few times until she finally relaxed remembering where she was and how she got there. It had been so long since she woke up in this house that it felt weird to her. Looking down at her chest she smiled seeing a sleeping Oscar gripping onto her shirt still as he took steady breaths in and out, looking to her right where her hand was still being tightly gripped she smiled as her eyes feel on a sleeping Clarke and Olivia. Smiling softly, she carefully removed her son from her chest placing him in the space next to them on the couch, she stood herself up making sure to be quiet so she didn’t wake anyone up. Stretching herself out she walked upstairs to use the toilet, once she was done she came out of the bathroom her attention drawn to the bedroom her and Clarke used to share. Walking into the bedroom she smiled seeing the neatly made bed, stepping further into the room she felt a pang of sadness inside when she noticed that the pictures of her and Clarke over the years that used to fill the room were no longer there. Her attention was drawn to a leather jacket resting on the chair that was in the corner of the bedroom, the same chair Clarke used to sit and sketch in when she had a sleepless night. Instantly knowing the jacket was hers she picked it up instantly noticing that it smelt like Clarke’s perfume, smiling as she brought the jacket closer to her face she was brought out of her action when Clarke’s voice filled the room;

 

“I’m sorry if it smells like my perfume…...” Lexa turned around seeing the Blonde leaning on the frame of the bedroom door looking over at her almost intently “Oscar slept in here with me the last few nights, and last night he wouldn’t settle unless it was in bed with us…. like under the covers and everything” Clarke laughed out, the laugh easing the tension between them both instantly

 

“I’m sure I can cope…. I mean it’s not the worst perfume in the world…...unless your pregnant of course”

 

“Argh that was the worst part of being pregnant definitely, not being able to use my favourite perfume without throwing up”

 

“Well to give you credit, you are probably the only woman who can look completely flawless whilst throwing up the contents of her stomach”

 

“Ah Lex…. you always know the right things to say”

 

“I know it’s a talent”

 

“Indeed it is….” Clarke suddenly realised that her and Lexa had been flirting effortlessly and naturally for the last few minutes. Deciding to put a stop to it now before she found it harder to, she leant off of the frame looking at Lexa and saying “Anyway I just wanted to check everything was ok, in case the twins wake up and ask” Clarke finished talking and began walking away, as she reached the beginning of the staircase she felt Lexa’s hand on her wrist turning her around so they were face to face forcing her to look into Lexa’s eyes

 

“Clarke…your allowed to talk to me…. hell we can even flirt…. because its normal for us Clarke, we were together for over ten years and we’re all the other has really known. It’s just me and you here, and I know you still find me attractive”

 

“And how do you know that?”

 

“I mean come on….” Lexa smirked letting go of Clarke’s wrist and moving her hands up and down her body “Look at all of this Clarke…. how could you not?”

 

“Lexa” Clarke let out pushing lightly on Lexa’s right shoulder pushing her slightly back only for Lexa to brush it off and laugh softly “You’re such a big head”

 

“Is it a wonder with the things I can do with my tongue?”

 

“LEXA”

 

“Clarke….”

 

“Your terrible, you can’t say things like that”

 

“Why not...I mean it’s true isn’t it?” When Clarke blushed slightly and turned her attention away from Lexa, Lexa reached up moving Clarke’s head until they were facing each other again “Clarke you’re the one that told me I was talented with my tongue….so you don’t need to be embarrassed or anything else, we’re still married after all”

 

“It is”

 

“It is what?”

 

“It’s true that your very gifted with your tongue”

 

“I know right”

 

There was a comfortable few seconds of silence between them before Clarke softly spoke “I’ve really missed this Lex”

 

“Us talking about my gifted tongue?”

 

“No…you…us…everything about our family…the twins are so different when you’re here…. like their more relaxed and carefree….”

 

“And you?”

 

“What about me?”

 

“Is it the same for you having me around? Or is it harder on you?”

 

“It’s the same…. I miss you so much sometimes I don’t even think words can explain it…. especially cuddling up with you and the twins” Clarke’s hand naturally moved up to Lexa’s shirt gripping onto the material, she took a sharp breath in when Lexa took hold of her hand squeezing it softly “the feeling it gives me…. I can’t explain it, it’s just….”

 

“Home” Lexa responded interlocking her and Clarke’s fingers smiling when she felt Clarke tighten her grip “It’s weird, it’s like no time has passed by and we’re just a family again”

 

“I know I’ve really missed it…. it’s made me see things clearer than I was…I’ve been thinking over the last few days and I have something I wanna ask you…. I’m not gonna ask you to move back in before you get your hopes up…” Lexa nodded her head at Clarke still holding onto Clarke’s hand “Ok, so me and Oscar had a serious chat last night and he told me off for a few things as well….” Clarke smiled and laughed softly thinking about her son’s words the night before and how much he looked just like Lexa when he was telling her off “Anyway I was thinking that may…...” Before Clarke could get the last word out they both heard Oscar’s scream come from down stairs

 

“MAMA”

 

They both instantly released each other’s hand, Lexa darted past Clarke and down the stairs missing numerous steps as she went down the staircase. Dropping her jacket as she hit the floor she saw a man standing near the couch where the twins were, going into instinct mode she rushed forward grabbing the man’s waist and throwing him backwards in the direction of the staircase, as she let go of the man Oscar came running at her jumping up at her tears covering his cheeks. Remembering the stranger in the room Lexa turned around just in time to see Clarke reach the bottom of the stairs, at the same time seeing the man who had been towering over her son and daughter, before she had a chance to speak Clarke shockingly let out;

 

“ROAN” Looking at Oscar in Lexa’s arms and seeing her ex trying to comfort their son as she wiped the tears from his cheeks she looked at Roan, who she could tell was angry “What the hell are you doing?”

 

“I came to see you…then this bitch attacked me”

 

“Lex?”

 

“Seriously Clarke….” Lexa asked not knowing why Clarke would believe she would attack Roan for no reason “You heard the same scream I heard…I came down and he was towering over Oscar…I didn’t know who it was so I threw him across the room, I’m sorry I didn’t ask him who he was, but I was worried for our son’s safety” Lexa finished, looking down at Olivia seeing she was still soundly asleep on the couch where Clarke had left her. Shaking her head, she soothingly rubbed Oscar’s back leaning down picking up her cup she walked towards the kitchen “Come on baby boy, let’s calm you down” She soothed as Oscar shook against her, small sobs coming from his body as he held onto his Mama tightly. Walking past Clarke and Roan, Lexa avoided looking at both of them mainly Roan she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to control her temper, and losing it front of her kids wasn’t something she wanted to happen ever. Instead she decided to put her son first, carrying him into the kitchen walking over to island counter she sat Oscar on it, the sadness and upset inside her rising as Oscar didn’t release his grip on her but instead buried his head in her chest. She didn’t push him instead letting him cling onto her until her was ready to let go and until he felt safe enough to let go.

 

* * *

 

**-In the living room-**

Clarke ignored Roan for a moment pulling away from his attempts to grab her hand, walking forward to check on Olivia leaning down next to her daughter checking she was still fast asleep, which she thankfully was she had inherited Clarke’s ability to sleep through almost anything. Gently moving some of Olivia’s strands of hair behind her ear, smiling as her daughter moved her hand to her mouth as she always did almost as if it was a protective instinct. Standing herself back she walked back over to Roan, her attention turning to the door noticing that it was unlock and there was no damage to it. Looking at Roan she wondered how he got inside the house, motioning to the door she opened it motioning for him to come outside with her, which he did without a word seeing the look of mild anger on Clarke’s face. Once they were outside Clarke pulled the door quietly shut, looking up at Roan she firmly asked;

 

“What the hell where you doing?”

 

“I came to see if Oscar was ok….and if you were ok”

 

“And how the hell did you get into my house?”

 

“I used the spare key”

 

“What spare key?”

 

“The one you keep in the draw in the kitchen”

 

Clarke thought to herself for a second before she realised what Roan was talking about “Give me them” When Roan went to protest she firmly said “Give them to me now” Roan relented pulling the keys from his pocket and handing them to Clarke, she held the keys in her right hand running her fingers over the keys before looking up at Roan again “These are Lexa’s keys…nobody else’s”

 

“They are Lexa’s……you mean they were Lexa’s keys…. you two have been broken up for nearly a year Clarke….and we are together so I should have a set of keys”

 

“We are not together Roan, It was nice having you around it really was, you’ve helped me out massively but haven’t you wondered why the only thing we’ve ever done is kiss”

 

“We’re taking our time”

 

"No we're not, I was trying to do what I thought was right but it isn't I'm sorry but I'm gay. I don't find men attractive not you not any of them, we should've had this talk a long time ago but I needed someone to help me get over the massive bump in the road...you knew that going in, I am sorry for everything I put you through but I can't change who I am...you said we were together and the only reason I let you keep saying it was because I couldn't find the right time to say what I needed and I thought the kids liked having you around, I don't mean that to sound cold but that's how I feel, like I said I can't change it...I'm sorry”

 

“Ok”

 

“Ok…” Clarke repeated slightly confused at Roan’s reaction to her rejection “That’s it, just ok?”

 

“Clarke, you can’t force yourself to like me and I understand that…. all I ask is that you let me help you out still, around the house, with shopping, with the twins with everything I’ve been helping with”

 

“Um that would be nice…. But you don’t need to do that”

 

“I want to; we are friends after all Clarke”

 

“Ok” Clarke paused for a second feeling a little insecure about the eagerness that Roan was showing to not walk away from her. If she was honest it was a little unnerving that he didn’t seem to be able to take no for an answer. Pushing her weird feelings to the side, wanting to go back and check on her daughter instead of standing on the porch explaining the same thing over and over to Roan. “I have to get back inside” She started turning to walk back inside only to be stopped by Roan’s voice.

 

“Can I come in? I wanna check that sink for you and I’d like to apologise to Lexa and especially to Oscar for scaring him”

 

“Ok, but you can’t stay for too long ok?”

 

“Ok” Was all Roan let out before Clarke turned walking back into the living room, seeing Olivia was stirring in her sleep she winced when the door slammed shut behind her and Roan, looking back at Roan seeing the apologetic look on his face. She decided to let it go, she continued looking at Olivia watching as her daughter sat up on the couch her face a picture of confusion as she rubbed her eyes, as she looked over at Clarke she let out a small smile seeing her Mommy standing there. Clarke smiled walking forward quickly and kneeling in front of her she smiled at her daughter “Hey princess, how are you feeling?”

 

“My throat hurts Mommy” Olivia let out a sad frown on her face as she leant forward wrapping her arms around her Mommy and resting her head on her shoulder “Mama stay Mommy?” She softly asked in her sick and dazed state

 

“Yes Mama stayed, she's in the kitchen baby…do you wanna go see her?”

 

“Yes Please Mommy”

 

“Ok baby…let’s go see Mama” Clarke smiled out, standing herself up holding onto her daughter so she didn’t drop her at any point when they were getting up. As she turned to walk into the kitchen Clarke stopped walking hearing Olivia say “No Roan Mommy” The sound was distressed and upset more than anything soothingly rubbing her daughters back looking at Roan

 

“Can you wait in here please?” Roan nodded his head at Clarke’s words smiling softly before he made his way over to sit on the couch. Silently nodding her head in thanks she walked into the kitchen seeing Oscar sitting on the island in the middle of the kitchen, his hands locked with Lexa’s as he sweetly and innocently giggled at something Lexa had said or done. She watched as Lexa placed a gentle kiss on their son’s forehead as he released her hands and wrapped his arms around her hugging her tightly. Walking further into the kitchen she smiled when Lexa looked at her, seeing the faint glares of anger in Lexa’s eyes she turned her attention back to Oscar “You feeling better now my little prince?”

 

“Yes Mommy”

 

“What were you laughing at?”

 

“Mama was singing and dancing” Oscar laughed out smiling as the laugh turn into a dirty giggle as his small body vibrated from the laugh his chest bouncing up and down slightly.

 

“She was huh? What was she singing and dancing to?”

 

“The elephant song”

 

Clarke smiled walking forward sitting Olivia on the island near Oscar, letting Olivia rest her head on her chest knowing she was still sick. Gently stroking the back of her daughter’s hair, smiling as she felt Olivia grip onto her shirt a little. “Mama loves the elephant song”

 

“Lots and lots” Oscar giggle back at his Mommy, lifting his head and looking at her, his face becoming more serious “Is the Bad man gone Mommy?”

 

“He isn’t a bad man Oz; you know he isn’t…. he didn’t mean to scare you he just wanted to see if you were feeling better”

 

“Shouldn’t stare Mommy, Mama said its rude”

 

“I know he shouldn’t, that’s why he wants to apologise to you. Because he knows he scared you and he didn’t want to do that to you” Seeing the caution on her son’s face she softly added “Mommy will stay with you…. but you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to baby”

 

Oscar paused for a second looking at Olivia who was still leaning her head on Clarke’s chest, slowly falling back to sleep as she listened to everyone talk. Looking up at Lexa he softly pulled on her top making her lean forward so they were closer together “Can you come Mama?”

 

“If you want me to stay with you?”

 

“Yes please Mama”

 

“Ok, then as long as you don’t feel scared. And as long as you want to go in the living room, Mama will stay with you”  


“I want to Mama…. have to be nice Mama”

 

“I know baby…. you’re such a good boy”

 

“Thank you Mama” Oscar smiled out leaning up kissing his Mama quickly before turning to his Mommy and softly saying “I’ll do it Mommy”

 

“Thank you, my handsome little prince” Clarke responded not missing the unimpressed look on Lexa’s face. Leaning forward holding onto her daughter she placed a kiss on Oscar’s cheek, as she stood up she noticed the sad frown on his face

 

“Proper kiss Mommy”

 

Clarke laughed softly leaning forward again, kissing her son quickly on the lips before standing up and looking down at Olivia smiling brightly as she noticed her daughter had fallen back to sleep. “I’m gonna put Livy in her bed so she can rest up then we can go in the living room together ok?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mommy, Clarke smiled at him before carefully leaning down placing her arms underneath Olivia’s arms carefully lifting her daughter up and onto her chest, holding onto her tightly but gently heading upstairs to lay her daughter down in her bedroom. Walking towards the stairs, after a second she felt something beside her, looking down she smiled when she saw Oscar next to her smiling up at her. Reaching one of her hands down she smiled when Oscar took hold of her hand toothily grinning up at her, they walked up the stairs and into the twin’s bedroom, releasing Oscar’s hand she carefully laid Olivia down in her bed, pausing to bring back the sheets she smiled when Oscar stepped in front of her pulling the duvet cover backwards so that Clarke could lay his twin sister down in the bed.

 

Carefully leaning forward Clarke laid her daughter in her bed making sure Olivia’s head gently rested on her pillow so she didn’t get a neck ache. Leaning down she placed a small kiss on Olivia’s forehead before pulling the covers over her daughter, tucking her into bed so she was warm and comfortable. As she turned around she smiled seeing Oscar waiting patiently near his bed holding a bottle of his medicine in his hands, shuffling along the floor looking at her son she smiled taking the bottle from him putting it on the table in between the twin’s beds whispering to him “How did that get in here huh?” Oscar shrugged his shoulders looking at his Mommy “Oh well, should we leave it there in case you need it later?” Oscar nodded his head softly at his Mommy, watching as she stood up holding her hand out to her son, who took hold of it quickly, walking out of the bedroom quietly closing the door so no noise from downstairs woke up Olivia.

 

Once they were back downstairs Oscar ran off and got Lexa pulling her into the room holding onto her hand tightly, pulling on her hand until they reached the couch sitting on the free space next to the TV. Clarke slowly walked forward going to sit down closer to the front door and Roan, as she was about to sit down Oscar darted over to her “Sit with me Mommy” He said taking hold of her hand and pulling her over to where he and Lexa were sitting on the couch, sitting down next to Lexa she smiled when Oscar climbed onto Lexa’s lap keeping hold of her hand as he did so, before he looked towards Roan expectantly awaiting an apology from him. Clarke noticed the little boy’s look and let out a cough signalling for Roan to start with his apology to her and Lexa’s son.

 

"Ummmm….ok so I owe you an apology little man….I shouldn't have scared you like that, you see I was worried when Mommy didn't message me yesterday or the day before so I wanted to come and check on you all to make sure you were ok…..I know I shouldn't have leant over you like that….and I am really sorry buddy”

 

“You were rude to Mama too”

 

“I know I was, and I'm sorry Lexa I was just I don't know…...embarrassed I suppose at how you threw me with ease…I knew you were strong but that was something else”

 

“Mama is strong like superman” Oscar excitedly let out looking to his Mama and smiling at her as she nodded her head and kissed him on the cheek. Oscar shuffled himself down from Lexa’s lap after she reluctantly let him down, he walked over to Roan stopping in front of him looking up at Roans face softly saying “I forgive you Roan” Oscar smiled up at Roan before leaning forward and hugging him

 

Roan happily accepted the hug a little taken aback at the little boy’s kindness and the sentiment of the hug. Coughing back the lump in his throat he hugged Oscar back softly whispering “Thanks buddy” Softly releasing the smile as the little boy looked up at him replying

 

“Your welcome” Turning around Oscar ran back over to Lexa jumping up onto her lap, laughing as his Mama caught him and lifted him the rest of the way. Looking up at her he softly said “Can we play toys Mama?”

 

Before Lexa could respond Roan coughed softly before asking Clarke “Would you like me to check that sink now or leave you all to it Clarke?”

 

“Um you can check it now, save you coming back another time. Once you know what's wrong I can arrange someone to come out”

 

“Ok, I should be able to fix it, I shouldn’t be too long.” Roan responded smiling at Clarke before standing up and walking up the stairs towards the bathroom suite that was off of Clarke’s bedroom

 

When Lexa motioned to their son to go get his toys Oscar jumped off her lap running to the box he knew his Mommy kept all his toys. As they waited Clarke noticing the look Lexa was giving her:

 

“What is it Lexa?”

 

“Nothing”

 

“You've been giving me an evil look since Roan got here”

 

“No I haven't”

 

“You have Lexa and it's getting ridiculous now…...what exactly did I do huh?”

 

Lexa gritted her tooth for a minute before biting her bottom lip and letting out a breath looking at Clarke and saying “You believed him…. you believed someone else over me again”

 

“What? ......this is because I asked what had happened when I came down the stairs?” Lexa nodded her head at the question causing Clarke to explain “It wasn't that I believed you’d attacked him Lex, it was that I was shocked and I had no idea what was going on…. plus, I trusted you to tell me the truth, I know you'd never lie when the kids are involved”

 

“So you didn't think I would lie?”

 

“Of course not…. I was more worried about how Roan got into the house”

 

"So you didn't think I'd attacked him?”

 

“No of course not…. even if you had I wouldn't have blamed you, like you said I heard that scream from Oscar, I literally felt my heart stop”

 

“Oh…. I’m sorry then…I shouldn’t have given you that look I just…...” Lexa paused for a second trying to find the right words to tell Clarke what she was feeling “I…I still love you Clarke, and I can’t turn that off no matter how hard I try to…...and despite everything we’ve been through the thought of you hating me or thinking bad of me in anyway….it hurts”

 

Before Clarke could respond Oscar came bounding over to them his small arms carrying a mixture of toys, from race cars to action figures including Oscar’s favourite superman figure. Stopping excitedly in front of his Mama and Mommy he placed the toys on the small space between Clarke and Lexa looking at Lexa and softly saying “Can we play now Mama? I got all the toys I want”

 

“Of course we can baby….as long as I can be Batman….”

 

“Ok Mama…. here…” Oscar sweetly let out handing Lexa the batman figure she had brought him for his fourth birthday months ago

 

“Thank you baby” Lexa let out as Clarke slowly stood herself up allowing her son to sit himself down on the couch next to Lexa, looking back at the two she removed herself from the room walking over to the kitchen trying to push back all the feelings that were threatening to push to the surface, just from hearing Lexa say she still loved her, something that she hadn’t heard her say in a long time. Once she was in the kitchen she looked around looking at the clock seeing it was almost lunch time she decided that busying herself making lunch for her Lexa and the twins was probably the most productive way she could push her feelings back.

 

* * *

 

Minutes passed as Clarke prepared the lunch, deciding to just go with something simple and easy for the twins to eat in their sick state, she decided to make tomato soup and toast. Something she knew the twins loved to eat even when they weren’t sick, her and Lexa had gone through a few hard times on occasion since the twins were born even before and they had soon realised that bread and soup was healthy and affordable for them during those hard times. As she made enough toast and soup for everyone she found herself smiling as she thought about her and Lexa in their apartment, it was one month that they had really struggled for money they were both in college and were both only working part time which often left them with not a lot of money. This one night they couldn’t afford anything other than Tomato soup and bread, Clarke remembered how Lexa cut the bread up into small heart shapes and made sure that Clarke had more soup than she did, she also remembered how it turned into her scolding Lexa for giving her more than herself, that turned into a conversation where Lexa told her that she would always put Clarke before herself, and that had led to them forgetting their soup and bread, abandoning it in favour of making love all night coming back to the soup hours later.

 

She was brought out of her thoughts when she felt someone tugging on her jeans, abandoning her thoughts she looked down seeing her son looking up at her, his face soft and calm. Smiling she brought her left hand to gently run through her son’s light brunette hair “What’s up my prince?”

 

“I’m hungry Mommy” Oscar answered resting his head against Clarke’s thigh as Lexa entered the kitchen smiling at the scene in front of her eyes

 

“I’m making some soup and some toast fingers for you now baby”

 

“Is it mato soup Mommy?”

 

“It is baby boy”

 

“YAY” Oscar exclaimed lifting his head from Clarke’s thigh running over to Lexa and stopping at her legs looking up at her “We’re having mato soup Mama”

 

“I heard baby” She smiled leaning down hugging her son as she leant down, placing a small kiss on the side of his head she softly said “Why don’t you go check your sister is still asleep then go wash your hands in your bathroom”

 

“Ok Mama….” Oscar replied going to run off but stopping himself turning and running over to Clarke stopping and looking up at her saying “Don’t start without me Mommy”

 

“Eat without my little prince…...only if he takes too long”

 

“I won't Mommy I swears” Clarke smiled at Oscars sweet response leaning down kissing Oscar on the forehead, watching as he smiled brightly turned around and then ran full force out of the kitchen and up the stairs. They both smiled as they heard Oscar’s feet paddling up the stair case before instantly going quiet, he must have remembered his sister was sleeping and walked quieter so he didn’t wake her up if she wasn’t already awake. The smile dropped from her face when she looked at Lexa, pushing her sadness aside she softly spoke “I’m making some for you as well”

 

“Thanks…” Lexa paused for a second feeling guilty for laying her feelings on Clarke like she had, she knew how hard things were for her so she had no idea how hard they were for Clarke. Walking closer to Clarke she stopped next to her ex softly speaking “I’m sorry for what I said back there….” Seeing the look on Clarke’s face she clarified exactly what she meant “I meant every word of it Clarke…but I shouldn’t have said it, it wasn’t fair of me to lay all of that on you, especially with everything going on with the twins” Seeing a tear that had escaped Clarke’s eyes she reached up gently wiping the tear away, her hand lingering as the tension between them remained thick, she kept her hand there for what felt like hours until they heard footsteps coming back towards them, taking a step back and dropping her hand Lexa looked at Clarke seeing that look of love she’d seen in her eyes so many times before, but this time she was unable to do a thing about it.

 

A second later and Roan entered the kitchen looking over at Clarke softly saying “The sink is all fixed Clarke, it was just a loose fitting, it wasn’t worn out so I just tightened it, it should be fine now but if it goes again feel free to text or call me”

 

“Thanks Roan, I really appreciate it…. let me give you some money for your trouble”

 

“Honestly Clarke there’s no need, I offered to help no strings attached…no money needed” Roan quickly responded smiling softly at Clarke before adding “Anyway I’ll leave you to it….and by the way Olivia woke up, she went back to sleep almost instantly but I thought I’d tell you anyways”

 

“Thanks Roan…I really do appreciate all the help”

 

“No problem Clarke” Roan faked smiling at Clarke before turning his attention to Lexa “It was nice to see you again Lexa” He decided that he would kill Clarke’s ex with kindness and when the time came Clarke would surely, easily pick him over her ex especially after what Lexa had done to her, and especially after he fully intended to make sure Clarke remembered what Lexa had done to her. Keeping the smile plastered on his face he looked to Clarke knowing she fully believed that he was ok with them being just friends “If you need anything Clarke don’t hesitate to call me”

 

“Thanks Roan”

 

“Always happy to help” He responded smiling again at Clarke before turning and walking towards the front door, as he closed the door behind himself her felt Lexa’s eyes watching him, making sure that he left the house. As he walked towards his car the only thing he could think about was calling his sister, their plan was working perfectly until Clarke started letting Lexa back in, just one day had changed the way Clarke was thinking about Lexa and now they were spending the whole day together which was more than likely going to push him further back with Clarke, after months of him helping her out with things around the house and with the twins, one morning with Lexa and the twins had ended whatever they had going on, he needed to speak with Nia because he knew she’d know what to do.

 

Back in the kitchen Lexa and Clarke were standing in silence in the kitchen neither knowing what to say to the other. They were both thinking over what had happened between them seconds before Roan walked into the kitchen. Clarke continued to rack her mind, was it a moment, did they just share a moment together? She didn’t know right now but what she did know was that it felt good….no AMAZING to have Lexa’s skin against hers again. She couldn’t stop thinking about that feeling, that was until she was brought out of her thoughts by Lexa’s voice, turning her attention to her ex she softly asked;

 

“Sorry what was that?”

 

“I was just asking you if you’re ok”

 

“Oh I’m fine…. thanks for asking”

 

“No worries”

 

“Me and Roan aren’t a thing anymore…we never really were to be honest” Clarke kicked herself internally, ‘why the hell did I say that’ she thought to herself turning to the cooker again so she didn’t have to see Lexa’s reaction, grimacing slightly at the way the sentence sounded to herself. Thinking on her feet she kept looking at the food on the cooker as she added “I thought you should know…because of the kids and everything”

 

“Cause of the kids?”

 

“Yeah, of course, why other reason would you need to know”

 

“None I suppose” Lexa answered taking a breath in, she could tell from the fact that Clarke wasn’t looking at her that Clarke had told her for more reasons than kids. Maybe there was a little bit of hope for them to get back together, deciding to leave it for the moment she softly said “I’m gonna check on Oscar, see what’s taking him so long” Clarke gave a small nod, smiling to herself at the nod she walked out of the kitchen climbing up the stairs and walking to the twins’ bedroom, as she peered into the room from the doorway a smile broke out onto her face when her eyes landed on the twins both laying asleep in Olivia’s bed, Oscar had his arms protectively wrapped around his sister, it looked as if Olivia had woken up and Oscar had hopped onto the bed and cuddled his sister in comfort. Deciding to leave them to catch some sleep she pulled the door to so it was almost closed but was still slightly ajar. Walking back downstairs and into the kitchen she noticed Clarke pouring the soup into bowls “The twins are asleep, so maybe leave them some soup in the pan for when they wake up”

 

The sentence caught Clarke’s attention as she looked up at Lexa for a split second before looking back down at the saucepan in her hand. Seeing Clarke’s apparent discomfort at them being alone Lexa softly said “I can go if you want…if all of this is too much for you…. you can just call me once the twins wake up”

 

“No….” Clarke paused kicking herself again, she couldn’t believe how stupid she was being, shaking her head slightly she placed the saucepan back on the cooker hob making sure it was turned off so it didn’t burn the soup and the pan. Turning her attention back to Lexa she continued “I’m sorry…I just feel embarrassed…. it’s nothing to do with you”

 

“Why are you embarrassed Clarke?”

 

“Because of how I just blurted out how me and Roan aren’t a thing…...like you really needed to know…it’s so stupid”

 

“Why did you?”

 

“Why did I what?”

 

“Why did you say it?......it’s not really about the twins is it?”

 

“No…...I wanted you to know….so…so you don’t…. I don’t even know Lex…...I just wanted you to know” Clarke let out looking up at Lexa, seeing the remnants’ of a smile forming on Lexa’s lips “It’s just I want you to know that I still care…about you, and what you feel….and that I haven’t suddenly become straight”

 

“So what your saying is you still like vagina?” Lexa laughed out, the question having the desired effect she wanted when Clarke burst out laughing at her words. Walking forward she smiled gently rubbing Clarke’s arms as they both controlled their laughter, as Clarke composed herself and looked up at her, she reached up tucking some of Clarke’s loose hair behind her ear before softly saying “That is so much better…. your amazingly beautiful when you smile”

 

“Thank you”

 

“Your welcome”

 

Clarke reached forward taking hold of Lexa’s hand and squeezing it softly “I mean it Lexa…..thank you….and I am sorry for everything and I mean everything” Lexa smiled at her squeezing her hand back before Clarke let go and turned back to the two bowls she had poured tomato soup into, placing one of the bowls in front of Lexa and the other in front of herself, moving to the bread bin she pulled out a few slices walking back over to Lexa and placing the slices between them both, smiling softly at Lexa before turning her attention to the soup in front of them.

 

“You remember that time I made soup and gave you more than me…then you threw a fit because I refused to let you give me some of yours”

 

“I remember….and I didn’t throw a fit, I just protested”

 

“Protested?” Clarke nodded her head at Lexa’s question making the brunette laugh softly “Clarke you literally threw a tantrum…your arms folded over your chest and you get this insanely cute pout on your face…” Lexa paused for a second when something finally clicked in her head “That’s where Oscar gets his pout from….and the arms crossing….it’s like a mini you” Lexa managed to finish her sentence before she burst into a fit of laughter, making Clarke form the exact pout Lexa was talking about seconds before hand, seeing the pout now on Clarke’s face only made Lexa laugh even more, bending over resting her arm on the edge of the island counter before resting her head against her arm laughing even harder.

 

“Lexa…” Clarke let out only for Lexa to continue to laugh at her pouting expression “LEX…” Clarke let out again this time moving forward and poking Lexa in the stomach trying to stop her laughing. The poke only made Lexa laugh a little more this time standing herself up and looking at Clarke holding her stomach softly “LEXA…. It’s not funny” Lexa was to caught in her laughter to be able to respond to Clarke’s words, instead she just looked at Clarke shaking her head softly. Clarke felt the smile growing on her face, suppressing it she moved forward going to poke Lexa again and maybe even grab her and try to make her stop laughing. But as her hand was about to touch Lexa’s stomach, Lexa grabbed hold of her by the wrist spinning her around until her back was pressed against Lexa’s front, Lexa’s arms instinctively wrapping around her holding her in place, Clarke instinctively leant forward trying to get out of Lexa’s grip, her attempt was unsuccessful as Lexa held onto her tightly neither of them thinking about anything at all. After a few seconds Clarke stopped struggling against Lexa and relaxed feeling Lexa’s chin hoovering over her right shoulder as she softly spoke into Clarke’s ear;

 

“Admit it Clarke…. or I’ll be forced to tickle an admission out of you”

 

“I’m admitting nothing Lexa”

 

“Ok…that’s how you wanna play” Lexa let out her hands moving to tickle Clarke’s stomach, Clarke used the opportunity to turn herself in Lexa’s arms so they were face to face, hoping she would be able to get out of Lexa’s grip, as they came face to face they looked at each other both of their breaths catching as they realised how close they were at this moment in time, before they could say anything to each other Oscar’s voice interrupted them

 

“Mama…. Mommy” He tiredly called out rubbing his eyes with his fists as he walked into the kitchen.

 

“We’re here baby” Clarke called out as Lexa released her hold on Clarke, both of them stepping back returning their attention to their respective bowls of soup, both at the same time looking at the doorway waiting for their son. They both smiled as he walked absentmindedly over to them stopping next to Clarke and resting his head on her outer right thigh as he reached up with his right hand gripping onto Lexa’s jeans. Something he used to do all the time when Lexa lived with them. “You enjoy your nap my prince?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mommy’s question his eyes still closed as he rested his head against Clarke’s outer thigh “You hungry Oz?” Clarke laughed as her son’s eyes opened up and he looked up at her smiling softly at her and nodding his head. Holding her hands in front of him she smiled when Oscar reached his arms up in the air. Lifting her son off of the floor sitting him on the island counter between her and Lexa

 

“Hi Mama” Oscar let out leaning forward and hugging Lexa just as she was about to eat some of her soup. Placing the spoon back in the bowl Lexa leant forward hugging her son back gently placing a kiss on the top of his head. Smiling when he squeezed his arms before letting go and turning his attention to Clarke, “Hi Mommy” He softly said repeating what he had done with Lexa with Clarke this time, when he let go Clarke got a piece of bread breaking off a piece and dipping it in her tomato soup offering it to her son who excitedly giggled taking the piece of bread from her and eating it “I like your smile Mommy” He mumbled out as he chewed on his food

 

“Oz, no talking when you’re eating” Lexa reaffirmed looking at her son, making sure he remembered his manners

 

Oscar was about to speak again with his mouthful when he stopped himself finishing chewing he looked up at Lexa “Sorry Mama” She smiled at her son ruffling his hair softly, turning back to Clarke he looked up at her again saying “I like your smile Mommy”

 

“You do?” Oscar nodded his head at Clarke’s question “You’re not just saying this to get some more of my tomato soup?” Oscar laughed and shook his head at his Mommy “Your sure?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mommy giving her a toothy grin “I think Oscar gets his toothy grin from you Lex” She laughed out when Lexa turned to her finishing her mouthful of soup and bread before she gave Clarke her own toothy grin. Turning her attention to her confused son she continued “Would you like some more soup?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mommy softly as he finished his last bit of bread. “I tell you what…I’ll do you your own bowl with toasted fingers…if….” She laughed softly as Oscar sat up a little straighter looking up at her waiting for her to finish what she was saying “If you go wake up Olivia for me”

 

“But she’ll be mad Mommy”

 

“No she won’t…. just tell her that Mommy said she has to come get some lunch….” When Oscar looked at her unsure she continued “She’ll be feeling better now I promise…She’s had her medicine so she won’t be grumpy anymore…. ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy…I’ll wake her up”

 

“Thank you Oz” Clarke smiled leaning down kissing her son quickly on the lips as he smiled up at her laughing softly. Lifting him from the island down onto the floor she smiled as he turned and ran towards the stairs to wake up his sister. Turning her attention back to the soup she was eating she continued to eat it, knowing she was more than likely going to have to feed Olivia due to the little girl being sick. Feeling Lexa’s eyes on her she looked sideward at her asking “What?”

 

“Nothing…. just…before was nice”

 

“You mean you holding me hostage”

 

“Hostage? ...please you loved it…. if I was holding you hostage, you wouldn’t have been laughing”

 

“I was laughing under extreme duress”

 

“Extreme duress?”

 

“Yes”

 

“Sure you were”

 

“Um…excuse me I was”

 

“Well you wouldn’t have been under ‘Extreme Duress’ if you’d just admit that Olivia inherited your cute pout”

 

“I do not pout Lexa”

 

“But you do though Clarke”

 

“Lexa….” Clarke defensively let out moving forward “I do not pout” She added this time a pout covering her face as she looked at Lexa

 

“Really Clarke…...your defence is to pout at me”

 

“LEXA…I Do Not Pout…” She repeated moving forward even more until she was only inches away from Lexa, she smirked biting her bottom lip before she turned around slightly dipping her soup bringing it up until it was between her and Lexa, she smirked when Lexa looked at her and raised both her eyebrows “Admit I’m right” When Lexa smirked at her she added “Don’t make me do it Lexa” Again Lexa just smirked at her keeping her eyebrows risen as if daring Clarke to do something “Fine you asked for it” She let out dragging her finger from Lexa’s forehead down the bridge of her nose and over her mouth and chin, laughing at the shocked expression on Lexa’s face “I warned you” She smugly added smirking uncontrollably at Lexa who was simply nodding her head again and again, after a few seconds Lexa stopped nodding her head and let out one laugh, Clarke knew what that meant she had seen that look from Lexa numerous times, slowly taking a few steps backwards she defensively said “Lex….Lexa come on don’t….Lex….” Clarke let out a small scream yelling Lexa’s name softly as she attempted to turn and run away only for Lexa to grab her waist pulling her backwards until her back was pressed against Lexa’s front.

 

“You aren’t getting away with that” Lexa let out as she held onto Clarke with one arm moving her other arm to dip into her soup doing just as Clarke had done to her, dragging her finger down Clarke’s face making the blonde squirm and let out a small grown, releasing Clarke she smirked at her ex unable to stop herself laughing as she walked over grabbing a tea towel to wipe her face. Seeing Clarke wiping her face with her hand she wiped her own face walking back over to Clarke and softly saying “Here…” Reaching up she naturally started gently wiping the soup from Clarke’s face, feeling and seeing Clarke’s breathing slow down and deepen slightly, she knew what it meant because it was the same thing she was feeling, the same thing that had always happened between them whenever they got close like this. Lexa finished wiping the soup from Clarke’s face she lowered the tea towel placing it gently on the island counter as her and Clarke looked into each other’s eyes again, Clarke’s hand came up to grip onto Lexa’s wrist gently. As Clarke opened her mouth to speak she felt Oscar pulling on her jeans again, snapping her and Lexa out of their locked gaze, looking down at Oscar she could see he was pulling her jeans with his left hand and Lexa’s jeans with his right hand, but she also instantly noticed the worried look on her sons face;

 

“What’s wrong Oz?”

 

“Olivia won’t get up Mommy”

 

“It’s ok baby…I’ll go get her…” Clarke retorting not thinking into it, instead turning her attention to Lexa and speaking “Can you do him is….”

 

“NO MOMMY”

 

The loud fearful call from her son shocked both her and Lexa, they both looked down at him seeing his face was now filled with sheer panic, kneeling down and comfortingly placing her hands on Oscar’s arms “Hey baby its ok”

 

“NO MOMMY”

 

“Oz, calm down…. tell Mommy what’s wrong?”

 

“Olivia wont wake up Mommy”

 

“Ok…. But why is that scaring you?”

 

“She smells like strawberries Mommy…. Strawberries are bad for her” Clarke looked at Oscar not sure what to say, was her son panicking for no reason or not, she knew she’d have to check on Olivia but now her heartbeat was racing ten times faster than it was seconds before hand, her worst fears seemed to be confirmed when Oscar anxiously tapped her shoulders “And Medicine is open Mommy”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooooo....Hope you all enjoyed that chapter, the next one should be up on Saturday or maybe Friday. Please feel free to leave a comment or message me personally either is fine by me. 
> 
> Hope you all have a pleasant day :-)


	6. Strawberries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa jumps into action to help Olivia

** Chapter Six-Strawberries **

The panic inside Clarke intensified a million times more with four simple words from her son. She could feel her stomach drop and her heart sink as the words circled in her mind over and over. There was no way Olivia would take Oscar’s medicine so there was no way she could have an allergic reaction…. was there…. As all these thoughts ran through her head she could only formulate one word…one name…. Looking from her son up to her ex she let out a shaking and fearful:

 

“Lexa”

 

She didn’t need to say anything else as Lexa snapped out of her own daze, taking off in a sprint out of the kitchen through the living room and up the stairs towards the twins’ bedroom. Clarke didn’t move, she stayed kneeling down in front of her son, continuing to rub his arms in comfort with her hands her attention was on the door waiting and hoping for Lexa to come through the door and tell her Olivia was fine. Closing her eyes pushing back the tears of fear in her eyes she looked to Oscar, seeing her son now had tears running down his cheeks as he helplessly looked at his Mommy. Seeing the tears, she pulled Oscar towards her wrapping her arms around her son, he instantly wrapped his arms around her neck holding onto her tightly. Standing up she lifted Oscar with her, his legs wrapping around her waist as he buried his head in her shoulder. She wanted to tell him Olivia would be fine but she wasn’t sure what was going on and the last thing she wanted was to lie to her son. Carrying him into the living room she looked up the staircase not hearing anything from Lexa or Olivia, soothingly rubbing Oscar’s back she pushed her doubts aside and softly said “It’s gonna be ok Oz” Feeling Oscar grip onto her tighter she continued to soothingly rub his back hoping it would ease her son’s worry slightly.

 

Taking a deep breath in she began climbing the stairs one step at time, it was as if she was in slow motion, she wanted to run up the stairs and check what was going on, but she couldn’t seem to will herself to move faster, she didn’t know it was the fact that she was holding Oscar in her arms, or if it was that she didn’t really want to know if something was wrong with her daughter. But still she continued to climb the stairs, one at a time, until she reached the top of the staircase her eyes darting to the twin’s bedroom where she knew her daughter had been sleeping. As she walked towards the bedroom in question she still couldn’t make herself walk faster, her heartbeat was uncontrollable as if her heart was attempting to burst out of her chest, her breathing was deeper than it had ever been before as if she was gasping for every breath she took. Step after step she got closer and closer to the room, mentally trying to prepare herself for what she was about to see, about what she could possibly see once she entered that bedroom.

 

Taking a slow step into the bedroom her eyes landed on Lexa cradling their daughter in her arms, the worry and fear on Lexa’s face was clear for Clarke to see as Olivia gripped on to Lexa’s top tightly. She knew something was definitely wrong, but she could also see that Lexa was talking to their daughter who had her eyes open as tears draped down her cheeks covering them almost completely. Keeping Oscar in her arms so he didn’t see something was wrong with his sister, she took a step closer to Lexa and Olivia, as she did Lexa looked up seeing Clarke, a rush of relief rushing over her body and filling her face as she looked at Clarke and said;

 

“She’s having an allergic reaction Clarke……I need her epi-pen”

 

Lexa’s words filled Clarke’s ears completely and even though she understood every single word that she said, she couldn’t get her body to react or to move, tears began to rush down her cheeks quick and fast, she couldn’t speak or move all she could do was cry. Lexa spoke again hoping it would spark something inside Clarke “CLARKE…...She needs her Epi-pen now…” Still nothing, she still couldn’t move herself as hard as she was trying to, it was like she was paralysed in fear of losing her daughter. Her mind was running overtime but she still couldn’t move, she felt Oscar wriggling against her chest but she still couldn’t get herself to move. But still Oscar wriggled against her chest until her arms fell slowly, almost as if they were complying with the boys request even though her mind wouldn’t, as if her subconscious was kicking into high gear.

 

Once he was on the floor Oscar looked up at his Mommy seeing she was crying and not moving, he turned around looking at his Mama and seeing his twin sister lying in his Mama’s arms. Wiping the tears from his cheeks, he put on his brave face, the one his Mama had taught him after he fell over and cried in front of his friends he asked his Mama how to be brave in front of people and she taught him how to use his brave face, he walked over to his Mama and Olivia stopping in front of them, looking up at his Mama he clearly and confidently asked “What do you need Mama?”

 

Lexa hesitated for a second not sure whether bringing Oscar into this was the right thing, but right now she needed that epi-pen or she’d have to call an ambulance and waste even more time, she knew from looking her daughter over that the reaction wasn’t as bad as it could be but she also knew that it would get a million times worse if she didn’t give Olivia her epi-pen. Looking at Clarke, she saw her ex was still frozen in her place her eyes boring into their daughter, taking a quick breath and looking to her son she made her decision “Do you know where Olivia’s special pen is?”

 

“In you and Mommy’s room”

 

“Do you know where in our room?” Oscar nodded his head at the sentence “Can you run and get it please?” Oscar again nodded his head, turning and running out of the room past Clarke, running as fast as his small legs would carry him not stopping until he got into what he called his Mommy and Mama’s bedroom, running over to the bedside cabinet her knew his Mama always kept Olivia’s special pen in, Clarke and Lexa had told him where it was just in case he ever needed it in an emergency where they weren’t able to help their daughter themselves, but he knew not to touch it unless it was an emergency otherwise he would get in big trouble. Pulling the draw open, his eyes landed on the green and yellow pen his Mama asked for carefully picking it up he turned and ran quickly back to his bedroom holding the pen gently but securely in his hands. Turning into the room he ran until he was in front of his Mama holding the pen out to her “Thank you Oz” Lexa thankfully let out as she released a breath she didn’t even know she’d been holding in. Removing the epi-pen from the casing, she quickly removed the blue cap holding the pen so the orange cap was facing downwards “Oscar, can you come hold Olivia’s right thigh please?” She asked her son, smiling at him when he nodded softly at her, looking quickly back to Olivia she softly said “This is gonna hurt a little princess” Olivia just kept looking at her and Lexa knew that it was probably because her throat was starting to swell due to strawberry medicine she had somehow ingested. Not wasting anymore time she looked at Oscar who was holding his twin sister’s right thigh as he was asked by his Mama, looking back to the pen she held onto it firmly before she jabbed the pen into her daughter’s thigh, hearing the click of the pen she counted to three. “1……2…….3…” Removing the pen from Olivia’s thigh she dropped it on the bed knowing the needle was hidden and couldn’t hurt anyone, gently rubbing the spot on Olivia’s thigh where she had just injected her.

 

Minutes passed and she was more than ecstatic when the sound of Olivia crying softly filled her ears, tears of relief rushing down her cheeks as she comforted her daughter. Looking down at Oscar who had a small smile on his face as he still held onto Olivia’s thigh “Can I let go Mama?” She nodded her head at her son’s request smiling when he took Olivia’s hand with both of his rubbing the back of her hand with his thumbs softly talking to his sister “It’s ok Livia….Mama gave you special medicine” She loved how caring her son was being at this moment in time, it was just one example of his love for his sister, it reminded her of her and Raven when they were younger Hell even them now, she knew what it was like to have a twin, that connection was something that couldn’t be explained or divided it was in some forms an unbreakable and un-tetherable bond. Wrapping her arm around Oscar pulling him into her and Olivia so they were cuddling she looked up at Clarke, seeing the blonde was still frozen to the spot. Right now she really needed Clarke to snap out of it and she knew the only way she was gonna be able to do that was to get up and leave her daughter for a minute or two, she didn’t want to but she knew she had to. Carefully removing her arm from around Oscar and then placing Olivia on her bed she looked at her son softly saying “You look after Olivia for a second ok…. I need to talk to Mommy” Oscar smiled and nodded softly at her climbing onto the bed and sitting quietly next to his sister watching her chest rise and fall with every even breath she took.

 

Lexa smiled turning her attention to Clarke walking over to her and stopping in front of her seeing Clarke’s attention was still completely on Olivia, she took hold of Clarke’s hands manoeuvring her out of the bedroom and into the hallway, not wanting to risk being too far away from the twin’s just in case Olivia took a turn for the worse. Stopping near the wall next to the twin’s bedroom door, she continued to manoeuvre Clarke until Clarke’s back was against the wall in question. Looking into Clarke’s eyes she noticed the still frozen figure of her ex. Releasing Clarke’s hands she moved her own hands upwards, placing both her hands on Clarke’s cheeks forcing Clarke to look into her eyes “Clarke…” She softly ventured, moving a little closer to Clarke she spoke again “Clarke…. Olivia is fine ok…. she’s fine” It took a few seconds but finally Clarke blinked her eyes, her face changing its expression the worry fading away slightly and being replaced with shame.

 

“Oh my god…” She let out bringing her hands up to her face, only for them to be stopped reaching her face by Lexa’s hands, which were still gently holding onto her cheeks, fresh tears rush from her eyes down her cheeks and onto Lexa’s hands, looking at Lexa she blinked back more tears as she emotionally let out “I completely froze Lex…. what if she’d di….”

 

“Hey hey…don’t think like that….so what you froze”

 

“What if Oscar wasn’t here…...she wouldn’t have got the epi-pen at all…”

 

“But Oscar was here”

 

“But what if he wasn’t”

 

“Clarke…. you can’t think like that ok….you reacted naturally”

 

“Naturally…...it’s not natural to completely freeze and not be able to help your child”

 

“It is Clarke…” When Clarke looked at her unconvinced tears still rushing out of her eyes, Lexa continued gently rubbing both her thumbs back and forth on Clarke’s cheeks “People react in different ways…. some people jump into the action and others stand back and watch through fear of being hurt or of causing more damage…”

 

“I should have done something”

 

“Did you want to?”

 

“Of course I did”

 

“Did you try to?”

 

“Yes…. but I couldn’t move, it was like my brain and my body weren’t connected at all”

 

“See…. you wanted to but your love and your fear of losing Olivia overpowered you…”

 

“I just feel so useless”

 

“You weren’t and aren’t useless Clarke…you’re an amazing mother to our kids and just because you froze for a moment doesn’t mean you wouldn’t give your life for them…because I know you would….”

 

“Without a second thought”

 

“I know that Clarke….so please don’t be so hard on yourself…” Clarke nodded her head softly at Lexa’s words as her ex removed her hands from Clarke’s cheeks, letting Clarke fall forward slightly into a gentle embrace wrapping her arms around Clarke holding onto her lovingly and gently. “She’s fine Clarke” She re-informed Clarke, knowing that Clarke needed to hear those words from her again. She held onto her ex for a few minutes before gently pushing Clarke’s shoulders causing their bodies to disconnect, she instantly missed the warmth and comfort that having Clarke close to her brought but right now they needed to worry about their daughter.

 

“MAMA…. Olivia is crying for you” Oscar’s voice shouted out to Lexa making her turn her attention to the direction the voice came from softly responding to her son

 

“Ok baby…tell her I’ll be there in a minute” Turning back to Clarke she softly placed her hand on Clarke’s shoulder squeezing it gently “You ok?” She asked, getting a small nod of confirmation from Clarke before the Blonde opened her mouth and spoke

 

“I’m gonna call my Mom…. ask her to come over and check on Olivia…if we can avoid the hospital we will” Clarke let out knowing her daughter hated hospitals, so much that when she got her shots they had to either arrange for the shots to be given at their local doctors, or they would have to get Olivia to sleep until they were in the hospital then wake her up minutes before the appointment otherwise Olivia would freak out.

 

“Ok great…. maybe after you can come cuddle with Olivia, you know she’d love that”

 

“Ok…” Clarke let out, as Lexa turned around and went to walk into the bedroom she grabbed Lexa’s wrist stepping closer to Lexa, standing in front of her she leant forward placing a gentle kiss on Lexa’s cheek “Thank you” She smiled out before turning and heading downstairs to call her mom.

 

Once she was in the living room she stopped at the bottom of the stairs picking up Lexa’s leather jacket which was still on the floor from hours ago, it had been forgotten amongst the pleasant family time she had been spending with Lexa and Oscar while Olivia slept, hugging the jacket for a second she walked over to the couch placing the jacket on it gently before she turned and walked through the living room into the kitchen picking up her phone from the side where it had been since she made Oscar’s breakfast. Picking her phone up she unlocked it pulling up her mom’s phone number, her hands shaking softly as she pressed the call button, placing the phone to her ear listening to the dialling tone waiting for her mom to answer the call. After three or four rings the call is answered;

 

“Mom”

 

“Clarke…what’s wrong?” Abby asks instantly noticing the worried and scared tone of Clarke’s voice just from the one word her daughter spoke.

 

“Can you come over…like now please?”

 

“Sure…what’s wrong Clarke? Has something happened with Lexa?”

 

“No…Olivia had an allergic reaction…you know she doesn’t like hospitals an…”

 

“Say no more I’m on my way now I’ll be ten minutes max”

 

“Thanks Mom”

 

“Don’t mention it…” Abby said over the phone, as Abby continued to talk to her Clarke could hear her mom picking something up before saying something to who she assumed was her father, before she heard a door open and close and a car unlocking “Clarke, don’t give her anything to drink until I get there, she should be fine but I wanna make sure her throat isn’t swollen before she intakes anything, ok?”

 

“Ok Mom”

 

“See you soon Clarke…bye”

 

“Bye” Clarke softly says as the call is ended, making sure the call was ended she placed the phone in her front pocket in case her mom called her at any point on her way over. Taking a deep breath in, she leant forward resting on the counter for a few minutes before she finally composed herself turning and walking out of the kitchen through the living room and upstairs, walking up the staircase and across the landing until she was in the Twin’s bedroom again. As she entered she noticed Olivia was sat on Lexa’s lap with her hands dangling off of Lexa’s thighs, her calves and feet resting on the bed, as she rested the side of her torso against Lexa’s chest her back facing the wall allowing her to watch the door. She noticed Oscar sitting on the bed between Lexa’s side and the wall. As she walked into the room she noticed Olivia try and sit up as she walked further into the bedroom Lexa smiled at her softly safely;

 

“She was asking for you”

 

“She was?” Clarke responded continuing to walk forward until she was in front of Lexa and Olivia, as she stopped Olivia weakly lifted her arms in the air. Clarke smiled reaching down and lifting her daughter up onto her chest, as their chests connected together Olivia buried her head in Clarke’s shoulder, wrapping her legs loosely around Clarke’s waist as her arms wrapped around Clarke’s neck. Placing a gentle kiss on Olivia’s shoulder, Clarke sent Lexa a small smile of thanks before she softly rubbed Olivia’s back asking “How you feeling princess?”

 

"Bad mommy"

 

“I know baby; grandma is on her way…. she’s gonna check you over ok”

 

“No hospital Mommy”

 

“No hospitals if we can help it princess” Clarke reassured Olivia as she gently rocked her side to side, feeling Olivia gently sniffling into her shoulder she soothingly assured her daughter “You’re ok princess…. your fine” Placing a gentle kiss on Olivia’s shoulder again feeling her daughter tighten her arms around her neck.

 

“Mommy?” Olivia’s small voice let out as she kept her head buried in Clarke’s shoulder hiding her face

 

“What’s wrong princess?” Clarke let out looking down at her daughter, she knew Olivia and she knew when she was embarrassed or wanted to tell her a secret she would hide her head in some way. Turning her back to Lexa and Oscar, she walked across the room until she was near the door, holding onto Olivia securely with her left arm she brought her right arm up gently bringing her hand up stroking the back of her daughter’s head, Olivia moved her head slightly peering up and looking at her Mommy “It’s just you and Mommy now, Mama and Oscar can’t hear” Clarke lied, she knew Oscar probably couldn’t hear but she also knew the Lexa had great hearing and was probably paying attention to her and their daughter’s every word. Olivia believed her Mommy slowly lifting her head up a little more so she could look at her Mommy properly “What is it baby?”

 

“I’m scared Mommy” Olivia let out a small whimper as she said the words, her small face contorting in a mixture of fear and sadness. Clarke placed a loving kiss on Olivia’s forehead before she spoke, continuing to gently rock her daughter placing her right arm back around Olivia;

 

“Why are you scared baby?” Olivia didn’t say a word she just gave Clarke a sad pout “Is it because of your allergic reaction?” Olivia nodded her head “Are you scared it’ll happen again?” Olivia again nodded her head at her Mommy before resting her head on Clarke’s shoulder again “It’s ok to be scared princess, I know it must have been really scary not being able to get up or breath properly…. but you were so so so brave, and to make sure that it doesn’t happen again Mommy is going to make sure that nothing that can hurt you is out or anywhere you can get to it ok?” Olivia nodded her head into Clarke’s shoulder “You don’t need to be scared ok princess…. cause Mommy will protect you and make sure that doesn’t happen again ok?” Olivia nodded her head again “Ok then” Clarke smiled, thankful her daughter understood her words she wasn’t sure if her words were right or not especially for a 4 year old to understand but that fact that Olivia seemed to be considerably calmer in her arms was only a good sign, as she placed a kiss on Olivia’s head she turned around seeing Lexa smiling softly at her, walking back across the room she sat down on Oscar’s bed seeing her son was now cuddled into Lexa’s side his eyes watching her every move, poking her tongue out at her son she noticed him giggle softly, shuffling backwards on the bed she moved the pillow so it was resting against the headboard of the bed, carefully laying herself back against the pillow holding onto Olivia carefully.

 

As Clarke looked over at Lexa and Oscar she noticed the bottle of Strawberry flavoured medicine on the side cabinet, the lid was off of the bottle and was resting next to it on the cabinet surface. Raising her eyebrows, she looked over at Lexa motioning to the bottle, they both thought the same thing as they looked at the bottle…. there was no way Olivia could have opened the bottle. Looking down at her daughter Clarke wiped Olivia's forehead feeling Olivia was still a little warmer than she should be, placing a gentle kiss on Olivia's forehead she softly asked “Olivia…. baby did you open the medicine?”

 

“No mommy I swears”

 

“Hey I'm not angry….me and Mama just wanna know so we can make sure it doesn't happen again” Clarke soothingly said as Olivia looked up at her nervously “I promise I won't be angry if you took it”

 

“I didn't mommy…” Olivia paused for a second before lowering her voice and continuing “Roan gave me medicine mommy”

 

“Roan did?”

 

“I swear mommy…...I woke up and he gave me medicine then I went to sleep”

 

“You don't remember what medicine he gave you?”

 

“No mommy……am I in trouble?”

 

“Trouble……of course not baby girl, Mommy needed to know that's all…...thank you for telling me” Clarke soothingly said to her daughter, pushing the anger she was feeling inside down, as she looked across at Lexa she could see her ex signalling for her to stay calm in front of the twins. She knew Lexa was right but there were so many questions rushing around in her mind now, the main one was why on earth would Roan give her daughter medicine he knew she wasn’t allowed. She was pulled out of her thoughts and away from the anger she felt when she heard Olivia’s voice:

 

“Your welcome Mommy” Smiling at her daughter she reached her left hand up brushing Olivia’s hair away from her face she placed a kiss on her forehead before softly speaking:

 

“You are such a polite little girl” Clarke giggled softly when Olivia smiled brightly at her, she was about to speak to her daughter when the doorbell rang through the house, as she went to move she was stopped by Lexa who held her arm up in the air;

 

“Me and Oscar will answer that…. won’t we buddy?” Lexa finished looking down at their son who was still attached to her chest, he nodded his head at his Mama before removing his grip on her, climbing over his Mama’s legs and jumping onto the floor running over to Clarke and Olivia.

 

“We’ll get it Mommy” He sweetly said lifting himself up onto the bed allowing him to kiss Clarke on the cheek before he dropped himself back onto the floor, turning and running to the bedroom waiting patiently for his Mama to come and answer the door with him, Lexa smiled at Oscar before standing herself up completely as she walked towards the bedroom door towards Oscar she shot Clarke a glance, smiling softly at her before turning her attention back to Oscar walking out of the room with her son walking by her side with every step she took. As they reached the staircase Oscar quickly took hold of his Mama’s hand, holding onto it tightly as they walked down the staircase and towards the front door.

 

As they reached the bottom of the stairs Lexa stepped forward opening the door slowly, not noticing Oscar stop and wait at the bottom of the stairs anxiously. Lexa pulled the door open revealing a worried looking Abby and Jake, stepping to the side Lexa let Clarke’s parents enter the house, Jake was the first to embrace Lexa to her shock, she hadn’t spoken to Abby or Jake since she moved out so she wasn’t one hundred percent sure what their thoughts of her were, once Jake let her go Abby stepped forward wrapping one of her arms around Lexa as the other held her medical bag tightly. As Abby released her and stepped back she asked;

 

“Where is Olivia?”

 

“She’s in her room with Clarke”

 

“Ok…I’m gonna go up” She quickly let out not waiting for a response she walked forward, past Lexa climbing the stairs as Oscar quickly moved out of his Grandma’s way allowing her to get up the stairs unstopped. Lexa closed the door shut locking it again. She turned to Jake, who was now standing in front of Oscar with his back to his grandson, returning the smile he sent her way as he softly said;

 

“It’s so good to see you Lexa”

 

“You too Jake...it’s been too long”

 

“It has…. way too long”

 

“You want a drink or anything?”

 

“A coffee would be great thanks…. I can make it and look after my little man if you wanna go upstairs and be with Clarke and Olivia”

 

“No it’s ok…. Abby knows what she’s doing and Clarke needs to be up there more than me and I don’t wanna crowd Liv she gets a little tetchy after a reaction…plus it gives us more time to talk and catch up” Lexa smiled out her attention going to the figure of her son who was still at the bottom of the stairs, now behind Jake seeing her son’s shy demeanour she guessed he was shaken up a little by his sisters reaction, she remembered times when she’d had a reaction and Raven had been around, her twin had always told her how scary it was and she couldn’t imagine how scary that whole thing must have been for the four year old. She was about to suggest for Jake to go into the kitchen ahead of her, Jake turned noticing his grandson behind him a smile spread across his face as he knelt down and spoke;

 

“Hey kiddo, I’ve missed you loads…” Jake was taken aback slightly when Oscar stepped back nervously his face blank, but filled with a partial amount of fear as he looked at his Grandpa. Not sure what was wrong with Oscar, Jake softly added “What’s wrong Oz? It’s only me…. Grandpa” He slowly moved forward in his knelt position opening his arms wide to hug Oscar hoping his Grandson was just a little nervous from his sister’s allergic reaction, as he got closer to Oscar the little boy quickly darted around him rushing to his Mama, hiding behind her legs as his hands gripped onto the jean material on the back of her thighs. The action made both Lexa and Jake keep their attention on the little boy both of them worrying what was wrong with him. Looking up worrying at Lexa, their eyes met both of them exchanging worried looks before Lexa turned slightly looking down at her son seeing he was hiding his face she looked back to Jake;

 

“You go ahead Jake, me and Oscar are gonna tidy up in here then we’ll join you”

 

Jake instantly knew that Lexa wanted a moment alone with her son so she could talk to him, he knew how close the twins’ were to Lexa and how they hid their worries and anything else from everyone but her and Clarke. Smiling at Lexa he decided to leave her alone with her son knowing it was the best thing all around for his grandson “Ok…I’ll get making the hot chocolates”

 

Lexa smiled back at Jake watching as he turned around and walked out of the living room and into the kitchen. Once she was sure Jake was in the kitchen and out of Oscar’s sight, she turned around carefully removing Oscar’s arms from her thigh so she could kneel down in front of her son. As she knelt down in front of Oscar, her son lowered his head looking at the floor, reaching her hand up to Oscar’s chin she lifted the little boys head up so he was looking at her, a sad pout and teary eyes covered his face as he looked at his Mama, without a word Oscar leant forward wrapping his arms around Lexa’s neck resting his head between Lexa’s neck and his left arm. Wrapping her arms around her son, Lexa pulled Oscar closer to her holding onto him as she stood up lifting him off of the ground and onto her chest. Carrying him over to the couch she sat herself down, Oscar only moved to adjust his head moving so his head was resting on Lexa’s chest. Gently rubbing circles on Oscar’s back she felt Oscar relaxing a little more against her. Minutes passed before Lexa softly spoke, low enough so that only her and Oscar could hear what was being said;

 

“You know, It’s ok to be scared Oz” When Oscar remained silent Lexa placed a kiss on the top of Oscar’s head adding “You can tell Mama what’s wrong bubba?”

 

“Gotta be brave Mama” Oscar softly responded into his Mama’s chest his hands moving from around Lexa’s neck to rest on her stomach. Lexa softly lifted Oscar from her chest after giving him a few seconds against her chest knowing her was upset, sitting him back so she could look at him properly and so he could do the same with her she smiled softly before speaking;

 

“You remember when Mama told you about the Brave face, when I taught you how to do it?” Oscar sadly nodded his head at the questions “Do you remember when I told you that you don’t have to be brave for Mama?” Oscar again nodded his head at the question “Well, it’s just you and Mama now, so you don’t have to be brave for anyone else, because Mama is here to be brave for you so you can cry and wriggle around or moan as much as you want to” Lexa watched as Oscar turned around and check the room making sure that nobody else was in the room, once he was sure they were alone he looked at his Mama as fresh tears ran down his cheeks, reaching up and wiping the tears away Lexa continue “See there’s nobody else around so you can release all your emotions…..and you can tell Mama why you had to put on your brave face, ok?” Oscar nodded his head again before turning around and again checking the room repeating his action from before, turning back to face Lexa he softly spoke, keeping his voice low so only his Mama could hear his voice;

 

“Olivia was really sick Mama”

 

“I know she was baby, but she’s fine now”

 

“I was really scared….” As Oscar spoke his bottom lip quivered slightly and the sadness shone through his eyes as he continued speaking “Don’t want her to be gone forever Mama”

 

“Oz…did you think that Olivia was gonna die?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama’s question, Lexa literally felt her heart drop at the little boy’s admission, bringing her hands to her son’s arms she gently rubbed them up and down her son’s arms as she explained to him “I know it’s really scary when that happens, but Olivia is fine and as long as she gets her medicine then she’s fine…and that’s why Grandma is here she’s gonna check Olivia over”

 

“But she could die Mama”

 

“Not unless me or mommy wasn’t around to help her or give her the special medicine she needs…. but it’s not likely that Olivia would die because of the strawberries”

 

“But how Mama? Strawberries are bad for her…what if she has loads of strawberries Mama?”

 

“She wouldn’t because Olivia knows not to eat strawberries”

 

“But she did Mama”

 

“When Mommy was talking to Olivia did you hear what Olivia said to Mommy?”

 

“Roan did it” Almost as if he knew exactly what his Mama said Oscar continued “She could lie”

 

“Olivia wouldn’t lie about something this serious Oscar…” When Oscar this time went to speak Lexa raised her eyebrow at her son before continuing “She wouldn’t lie because the both of you know that lying is wrong isn’t it?”

 

“Yes Mama”

 

“See now Olivia wouldn’t lie about Roan giving her medicine because she knows that would be wrong… and there’s another reason she wouldn’t lie about it…”

 

“What reason Mama?”

 

“What colour is your medicine?”

 

“Red”

 

“And what colour is Olivia’s medicine?”

 

“Green”

 

“And does Olivia know the difference?”

 

“Yes Mama”

 

“So why would she take the red medicine if she knew it would make her sick?” When Oscar remained quiet Lexa added “She wouldn’t would she?”

 

“No Mama”

 

“See so there would be no way that Olivia could eat so many strawberries that she would die…because she knows there bad for her….”

 

“But what if you and Mommy are gone? Who will help Livy then?”

 

“You will……you see you’re her brother so she has to listen to you, and as you get a little older me and Mommy are gonna teach you all the things you need to know about Olivia’s allergy and how to look after her when she gets sick…. And in time you won’t need a brave face anymore because you won’t be scared because you’ll know what you have to do”

 

“But what if she doesn’t let me Mama?”

 

“Well, Olivia has to listen to you”

 

“Why Mama?”

 

“Because you see your just like Mama…” Oscar looked up at his Mama slightly confused at what she meant, he didn’t know a lot about the world but he knew he was boy and his Mama was a girl, so that couldn’t be what she meant, so what did she mean? He looked up at her waiting to hear what she meant as he had no idea himself “You know how me and Auntie Raven are twins”

 

“Like me and Olivia”

 

“Exactly like you and Olivia…but in your case you are more like Mama….because you were born one minute before Olivia was, just like I was born one minute before Auntie Raven which means technically I’m older than her….and that means that technically your older than Olivia, so if you ask her to do something she should because your older than her, plus I’m gonna talk to Olivia and tell her that if you try and help her with her medicine then she has to let you because you’re her brother and your trying to look after her….and that she can’t say no because Mama said so and because your older than her…..does that make sense?”

 

“Yes Mama” Oscar responded softly moving one of his hands to his Mama’s shirt gripping onto it as his other hand darted up, his fingers finding their way into his mouth an action Lexa knew meant her son was concerned about something

 

“What’s wrong bubba?”

 

“What if I’m not brave enough to help her?”

 

“You are, because if you weren’t then I wouldn’t ask you to would I?” Oscar shook his head at the question, his fingers staying in his mouth as he looked up at Lexa. Remember the present she had for Oscar in her car she smiled softly releasing now was the perfect time to give the present to her son. Lifting Oscar carefully off of her lap placing him on the couch, she watched as his face contorted signalling that he was about to start crying, quickly Lexa spoke explaining her actions to her son “I need you wait here for a few minutes while I get your present out of my car”

 

“Present?” Lexa nodded her head at her son’s question “Are you coming back Mama?”

 

“Of course I am…I have to bring your present aaaaaannnnndddd we have the whole day to spend together” Lexa responded making Oscar giggle in his space on the couch “Ok…I’ll be really quick I promise” She added leaning forward and placing a small kiss on Oscar’s forehead before she stood up grabbing her keys from her jacket, which was still on the couch, once she had her keys she unlocked the door giving Oscar a firm look so he knew not to attempt to leave the house, closing the door behind her leaving it slightly ajar she jogged the few feet to where her car was parked quickly rushing to the boot where she had placed Oscar’s present the day before, picking up the dark blue box before closing the boot once the boot was securely shut she moved around to the passenger’s seat, opening the door and grabbing Olivia’s bag from on the passenger’s seat where she had left it in her panic to get her daughter into the car. Closing the passenger’s door, she locked the car again before walking back into the house, as she opened the door she was meet with the sight of Oscar pushing against Clarke’s thighs pushing his Mommy back and away from the door as Clarke tried to calm him down and stop him moving. Seeing what was in front of her Lexa jumped into action placing the items in her hands onto the couch to her left before quickly moving forward and gently pulling Oscar back, turning him around so he was facing her “Hey what’s going on?” Oscar looked at his Mama his face filled with anger and confusion, and from what Lexa could see sadness, as he looked at her a number of emotions cross his face as he moved forward wrapping his arms around her neck. Lexa hugged her son back, looking at Clarke as she did so, both of them confused at their son’s behaviour. Pulling back, she gently removed Oscar from her neck looking down at him and softly asking “Why were you pushing Mommy like that Oscar?”

 

“She was trying to close the door Mama”

 

“So why would you push her?”

 

“Because you were coming back Mama…...she was going to lock you out Mama” Oscar argued as his hands came up to nervously grip at his t-shirt pulling on the fabric as he looked down at the floor “Don’t want Mama to go”

 

“Mama isn’t going anywhere bubba…. I told you we’re spending the whole day together remember”

 

“Want you to stay…. it’s better when Mama is here”

 

“I know it is baby, but we talked about this remember?” Oscar nodded his head at the question “So you know why Mama can’t be here all the time….and I know it’s confusing but you can’t be mean or rude to Mommy, she loves you so much, so much that not even words can express how much she loves you….and when your mean to her or you hurt her she doesn’t understand why and it upsets her….”

 

“I just wanted Mama to come back”

 

“I know that but you have to remember that Mommy isn’t the bad guy and you can’t be mean to her even if your angry…ok?”

 

“Ok Mama”

 

“Good boy…you know what to do” Oscar looked up from the floor to his Mama nodding his head and leaning forward before he leaned forward pursing his lips at his Mama wanting a kiss from her “Nah Uh Mister, you know what you have to do before you get Mama kisses”

 

Oscar looked at her thoughtfully before he contorted his mouth a little almost as of contemplating his actions as he looked between his mommy and his Mama, when he finally realised what his Mama was talking about his face filled with a toothy grin turning around he ran quickly over to Clarke pulling at her jeans as he looked up at her “I’m sorry Mommy” Clarke softly smiled at him leaning down and picking him up off of the ground, as he came face to face with Clarke his hands resting on her shoulders as he looked at her apologetically “Thought you were locking Mama outside”

 

“I know that now Oscar…. but you have to understand that being violent or really rough with people isn’t the right thing to do” Seeing the sadness creep into Oscar’s face she continued “I know it’s hard when your angry but if you don’t tell Mommy what’s wrong then she can’t help you can she?”

 

“No”

 

“See, if you’d have told me that Mama was outside instead of pushing me, then I would have waited…you understand what Mommy is saying?”

 

“Yes Mommy…I’m really really sorry Mommy I didn’t mean to hurt you” Oscar responded leaning forward and kissing Clarke on the cheek

 

“I know you didn’t” Clarke responded kissing Oscar on the cheek just as he had with her, as she pulled back Oscar started to wriggle in her arms, Clarke carefully placed him on the ground watching him curiously as he stood himself up straight Oscar carefully placed his hands on Clarke’s thighs just next to where they had been when he was pushing her, leaning forward he placed a gentle kiss on the exact spot his hands had been, Clarke smiled down at her son knowing what her son was doing “Were you kissing it better?” Oscar looked up at her nodded his head at her question, smiling she knelt down in front of Oscar holding her arms open wide for him, Oscar let out a massive smile lunging forward and wrapping his arms around Clarke’s neck holding onto her tight, when he released the hug he stepped back before quickly leaning back in and pursing his lips slightly, she smiled at him before leaning forward pecking him on the lips softly “All forgiven”

 

Oscar smiled before turning around running the short distance between him and his Mama stopping in front of her with an excited grin on his face “Now Mama?” He asked Lexa, who smiled giggling softly at Oscar’s actions before she softly nodded her head leaning down and kissing her son on the lips quickly. His attention quickly turned to the couch and he noticed the present on the couch, looking back at his Mama he softly asked “Mama, can I still have my present?”

 

“Mmmm I don’t know…I suppose if Mommy says its ok then sure”

 

Oscar turned his attention to Clarke looking innocently and hopefully at her, letting out a small laugh Clarke nodded her head at her son and his silent request. With Clarke’s nod Oscar excitedly turned his attention to his Mama who let out a small giggle as she smiled, standing up Lexa moved the small distance across the room to where the present had landed on the couch. Picking up the box, she turned around just in time to see Oscar stop in front of her, laughing again and sitting herself down on the couch she held the box softly nodding her head at Oscar for him to open the present in front of him. Smiling brightly Oscar excitedly searched the box for a way to open it, within seconds he found the opening lifting the lid of the box up, as he did so Lexa moved her head to the side wanting to see her sons reaction, she watched on as Oscar removed the wrapping tissue that covered the present, as he moved the last of the wrapping tissue that covered the present his eyes landed on the gift and he let out a massive gasp his hand shooting to cover his mouth, excitedly jumping up and down on the spot he turned around looking at Clarke in surprise, she couldn’t see what was in the box but she was guessing it was a great gift, she watched as Oscar stepped back to the present reaching into the box and lifting the present from inside it, revealing a smaller version of Lexa’s leather jacket.

 

Holding the jacket in front of him excitedly Oscar ran over to Clarke excitedly moving the jacket up and down in the air in front of her. The smile on his face was one that Clarke had never seen before, well that she could remember anyway, she couldn’t help the massive smile that spread across her own face at her son’s excitement and happiness, as he excitedly looked up at her speaking “Look Mommy…. it’s like Mama’s jacket” Clarke smiled at her son kneeling down and taking the jacket from Oscar

 

“Should we try it on?” She asked him getting another gasp from him before he excitedly nodded his head, his arms shooting up excitedly in front of him waiting to wear the jacket. Clarke carefully slid the sleeve of each arm onto each of Oscar’s arms, once both his arms were in the sleeves she pulled the jacket up Oscar’s back until it was completely on him, as she removed her hands from the jacket Oscar asked

 

“How does it look Mommy?”

 

“It looks perfect my little prince……you look just like Mama…but with less hair” Oscar laughed at Clarke’s comment before he turned around and looked at Lexa as she stood up and walked over to him and Clarke kneeling down in front of him she pulled back the left side of the jacket from Oscars chest pointing to the inside of the jacket she softly said;

 

“It’s got your initials on the inside pocket just like Mama’s does” She explained pointing to the **_OJW_** that was embroidered into the inside pocket of the jacket, reaching into the pocket she pulled out a hankie that was inside it “And look at this as well” She smiled opening the hankie out and unfolding it completely revealing **_Oscar_** in the bottom right hand corner of the hankie, Oscar let out another gasp as he excitedly took the hankie off of his Mama turning to show it to Clarke. As Oscar turned back around he launched himself at his Mama hugging her tightly

 

“Thank you Mama” He sweetly let out as he pulled back and kissed Lexa on the lips lovingly before his face turned serious “Can I share these with Olivia?” He sweetly asked making both his Mom’s smile brightly at his thoughtfulness when it came to his sister, Lexa smiled tugging on both sides of the open jacket before responding to her son’s question;

 

“You won’t need to share with Olivia because she has her own jacket and hankie”

 

Oscar let out a small gasp before hugging Lexa and responding “That’s the best thing ever Mama” Lexa laughed at her son’s sentence as he released the hug and smiled up at his Mama before Lexa or Oscar could say another word Clarke’s voice interrupted them both;

 

“Oscar…why don’t you go show Grandpa your new jacket”

 

Another gasp escaped Oscar’s mouth as he looked up at Lexa and sweetly asked “Can I Mama?”

 

“Of course you can…go show Grandpa how grown up you look” She let out watching as the excitement filled Oscar’s face before he then turned and ran past Clarke into the kitchen both of them hearing the excited ‘Look Grandpa’ that he let out as he entered the kitchen. Once she was sure that Oscar was with her dad, Clarke’s face completely changed from happiness and love for her son to one that was pure anger, her body tensed and without a word she walked to the door opening it, before she could open the door fully Lexa’s hand was around her right wrist forcing her to turn around;

 

“Wow Clarke where are you going?”

                                       

“Where do you think? …. I’m going to find Roan….” Before Lexa could get out another word, Clarke pulled her wrist free from Lexa’s gentle but firm grip on her wrist, pulling the door completely open and walking through it closing it behind her before Lexa could walk through it

 

* * *

 


	7. Cuddle Day

** Chapter Seven-Cuddle Day **

Clarke barely made it to the end of the porch before the front door opened and closed again, within a second Lexa appeared in front of her blocking her from moving any further away from the house. She tried to move past Lexa but was blocked with every attempt she made. Her face was filled with complete anger as she contemplated moving Lexa forcefully out of her way, though with that thought came the thought that Lexa would easily out power if she wanted to and force her to stay where she was. Shaking her head, she tried to supress the guilty feeling inside herself as she looked at Lexa, looking deep into those same eyes she had fallen in love with so many years ago;

 

“Move out of the way Lexa”

 

“No Clarke…I’m not going to let you do anything stupid”

 

“Stupid? Are you being serious? You heard what Olivia said Lexa”

 

“Yes I did Clarke…. but going off in an anger fuelled drive to find a man who is literally twice your size isn’t a smart idea…. especially in broad daylight and even more so when our kids are inside and vulnerable”

 

“He could have killed her Lexa…. if Oscar hadn’t gone upstairs she could have died Lexa…she could hav….” Clarke stopped herself as the tears escaped from her eyes and ran down her cheeks “I need to know what the hell he was doing? Why he did this? ...this is all my fault if I hadn’t brought him into this house then…”

 

“Clarke you can’t think like that ok….” Lexa softly responded intervening stopping Clarke from saying anymore, stepping a little closer to Clarke she brought her right hand up to Clarke’s cheek wiping away the tears on Clarke’s left cheek before bringing her left hand up and repeating the action on Clarke’s right cheek. Keeping both her hands on Clarke’s cheeks forcing Clarke to look at her she softly spoke “I don’t like Roan one bit I never have but not even I think he is evil or despicable enough to give Olivia medicine that he knows will make her sick…. before you jump to conclusions call him and ask him if he gave her the medicine, if he owns up then ask him why…”

 

“You think Olivia lied?”

 

“No, but I know from experience that having an allergic reaction can rattle your brain and makes things confusing, I can’t remember having one as a kid but as an adult they are horrible so I can’t even imagine how Olivia felt”

 

“What if he did give it to her?”

 

“We’ll deal with it when we find out, first you need to find out what happened…. ok?”

 

“Ok”

 

“And no blaming yourself Clarke, this isn’t anything that you could have stopped…” There was a moment of silence between them both before Clarke closed her eyes for a minute before opening them back up looking at Lexa she softly said

 

“I could have stopped it if I’d been honest with him from the beginning…. hell if I’d stopped him coming around everyday…. all of this could have been avoided completely”

 

“You can’t live in the past Clarke or on what if’s, we can only deal with this as best we can….and that means no going crazy and beating a man half to death without giving him a chance to defend himself…” Clarke can’t help but let out a small giggle at Lexa’s words as her ex removes her hands from Clarke’s cheeks “Oh you thought I was talking about you huh?” Lexa jokingly asked trying to lighten the mood and hopefully make Clarke’s anger disappear completely “If I’d seen him then I would have gone off on him…. I mean it, you wouldn’t have had a chance to dish out any punishment” Clarke let out another giggle before wiping her face again

 

“Ok…I get it I over reacted a little”

 

“No you didn’t…..any mother well any decent mother would have done the same thing, it’s what makes you a good mother Clarke…I’d say it’s one of the reasons I fell in love with you but you weren’t a mother then so…” Lexa softly smiled seeing a smile spread across Clarke’s face at the comment “Although you have always been caring…anyway what I mean is its ok to be angry or to want to destroy someone who has hurt someone you love, it’s part of what makes us human the fact that we care so much about the ones we love….But we also have to be able to control the anger that goes with the caring so much part…”

 

“Your right…Olivia needs me and running off isn’t how I should have dealt with this anger…I’m sorry”

 

“You don’t need to be sorry Clarke…like I said your only human and you reacted naturally…I mean it’s not like you were leaving the kids alone, you knew I’d be here and your parents too…”

 

“I’m such a terrible person” When Lexa looked at Clarke slightly confused at the sudden sentence “Oscar was so excited about that jacket and the whole time I was thinking about leaving him and going to find Roan”

 

“That doesn’t make you a terrible person Clarke it makes you human…. I mean you still cared about what he was saying to you right?”

 

“Yeah of course”

 

“See…you’re not a terrible person, your just someone who happens to be able to multitask” The comment made Clarke smile softly, not giving her ex a chance to put herself down she added “Let’s go back inside and check on our kids huh?” Clarke nodded her head at the question slash statement, smiling even more when Lexa stepped around her and opened the door for her to walk through it, once they were both inside Lexa closed the door too and locked it making sure neither of the kids could try and leave if they tried. Turning around she noticed Clarke was waiting for her, smiling at the Blonde she walked forward Clarke joining her and walking with her into the kitchen where they found Jake sitting at the kitchen table with Oscar on his lap excitedly pointing to his jacket obviously excitedly explaining something to his Grandpa. As he heard Clarke and Lexa’s footsteps on the floor of the kitchen his eyes darted around and looked at his Moms, Lexa smiled at the smile that was gracing her son’s face “You telling Grandpa about your jacket bubba?”

 

“Yeah….” Oscar excitedly and happily let out sending a toothy grin in his Mama’s direction “I told Grandpa about the special writing too Mama”

 

“You did huh? .... Did you tell him that you and Olivia both have your own jacket?”

 

“I did Mama….and about the hanpi’s”

 

“Hankies baby”

 

“Hankies….” Oscar laughed out a dirty laugh escaping his lungs as he clasped his hands together over his chest throwing his head back slightly as he laughed. All three adults in the room let out a small laugh at the little boy’s behaviour and quirkiness, after a brief moment Oscar’s laugh subsided and he looked to his Mommy and Mama asking “Can I go show Olivia?”

 

“Maybe after bubba…. instead I think you need to eat something”

 

“Can I have mato soup Mommy?”

 

“Of course you can my prince” Clarke responded smiling as Oscar excitedly looked at his Grandpa before carefully climbing down from his Grandpa’s lap and onto the floor, aided partly by Jake, running over to Clarke he stopped in front of her and next to Lexa looking up at her he softly asked;

 

“Can I help make it Mommy?”

 

“If you want to baby…. but you’ll have to take your jacket off”

 

“Good idea Mommy” Oscar responded amusing all the adults with his words, without a further word Oscar turned and ran into the living room disappearing for a few seconds before he reappeared in the kitchen, now jacketless and slightly breathless, stopping in front of Clarke again he held his arms up in the air. Clarke smiled softly leaning down and lifting Oscar off of the floor, as he wrapped his arms around her neck he looked at Lexa “I put my jacket with yours Mama”

 

Before Lexa had a chance to respond Abby walked into the room holding Olivia in her arms, Olivia’s head softly resting on her shoulder her eyes closed as her arms draped around Abby’s neck. Abby walked further into the kitchen sending a small smile to Clarke and Lexa before she softly spoke “She’s got a high fever but I think that’s the flu mainly, her throat is completely clear but slightly swollen from the reaction but other than that she’s fine. Just don’t give her anything too hot or too cold over the next few hours and she’ll be fine tomorrow and obviously no spicy food…. She’s had a few glasses of water to ease the after effects of the reaction and she’s been fine since…but she was asking for you both…. I was gonna leave her up there to rest but she wouldn’t let go” Abby smiled at placing a small kiss on Olivia’s forehead making the little girl look up at her opening her eyes

 

“Mama” Olivia let out, the word came out as more of a whine than anything else. Lexa wasted little time stepping forward almost instantly, smiling at Abby before leaning forward making sure Olivia could see her before she lifted her up. As soon as Olivia’s eyes landed on Lexa she removed her arms from around Abby’s neck her arms shooting in Lexa’s direction, Lexa reached forward lifting Olivia out of Abby’s arms and onto her chest smiling when Olivia hugged her tightly. Olivia’s arms wrapped around Lexa’s neck squeezing her arms together tightly, as Lexa brought her right hand up to soothingly and gently rub Olivia’s back whilst her other arm supported her daughters weight. Lexa continued her motion with her right hand whilst turning and watching as Clarke placed Oscar on the counter softly telling him to sit still and be careful whilst she turned the cooker back on.

 

She watched as Clarke grabbed their now empty bowls placing them in the sink before she walked over to the breadbin and grabbed some bread turning to walk towards the toaster and placing the slices inside before walking over to Oscar and lifting him up carrying him over to the toaster and allowing him to push the button down on the toaster. Lexa’s attention was brought away from watching Oscar and Clarke when Olivia moved against her chest, looking back to Olivia she noticed her daughter had pushed herself up on her chest her small hands resting on either of her shoulders her eyes locked on her Mama “You ok Princess?” Olivia nodded at the question softly still looking at her Mama a small smile spreading across her face “You feeling better?” Olivia again nodded her head her smile staying on her face. Lexa couldn’t help but smile back at her knowing what her daughter was probably thinking, “Did you think you were dreaming again?” Olivia nodded her head again at her Mama “Well I’m here and I’m not a dream see….” Lexa smiled brightly before leaning in and peppering kisses on Olivia’s face making her daughter laugh softly, pulling back, she added “Did Grandma take good care of you?”

 

“Yeah” Olivia answered nodding her head and bringing both her hands to her mouth “Was scary Mama”

 

“I know it is baby…it’s scary and confusing…and it makes you really tired doesn’t it?”

 

“Yes Mama…very” Olivia responded leaning forward so her head was resting on Lexa’s right shoulder her hands still over her mouth

 

“Did you see Grandpa is here?” Olivia shook her head against Lexa’s chest “Look he’s over there” She added turning herself slightly so Olivia could see Jake without moving her head from her chest

 

“Hi Grandpa” Olivia sweetly let out removing one of her hands from over her mouth to wave at her grandpa, Jake smiled brightly back at Olivia returning her wave with one of his own. Looking back up at Lexa Olivia softly asked “Where’s Mommy?”

 

“She’s here….” Lexa explained spinning herself around so Olivia could see where Clarke was, as Lexa stopped moving her and Olivia both saw Clarke and Oscar returning to the island counter next to them, Oscar was half holding a plate of cut up pieces of toast whilst Clarke held the other half making sure he didn't drop it “See Mommy is making some soup for Oscar” Lexa smiled out as Clarke placed Oscar on the island counter placing the plate next to him before she turned her attention to Olivia moving forward she leant down placing a kiss on Olivia’s forehead as she gently brushed the little girls hair back;

 

“Hey Princess”

 

“I missed you Mommy”

 

“You did?” Clarke asked her heart melting slightly as Olivia nodded her head at her “I missed you too princess…. are you feeling a little better?”

 

Before Olivia could answer her Mommy’s question Oscar let out a massive yell “GRANDMA” The shout caused everyone to look at him laughing at the fact that until now Oscar had seemed to have not noticed his Grandma come into the kitchen, obviously he was too focused on the food he and his Mommy were preparing. Clarke looked to Oscar giggling as she noticed the excitement on his face, his legs moving up and down lightly kicking against the side of the island he was sitting on, eating a piece of toast they had prepared at the same time. Reaching up she lifted her son onto the floor smiling as she watched him run around Lexa and Olivia running as fast as he could until he reached his Grandma, who was waiting with open arms for him, as he reached her hands Abby lifted Oscar into the air and onto her lap as he happily let out “Hi Grandma”

 

“Hello Handsome…” She added placing a kiss on his cheek as he continued to eat his piece of toast “How are you feeling? Olivia told me you were sick”

 

“I’m better now Grandma…Mama looked after me”

 

“I bet she did”

 

“Thank you for helping Livia, Grandma”

 

“You are very welcome”

 

As Abby and Oscar fell further into conversation Clarke turned her attention back to Olivia and Lexa smiling when she noticed Olivia was staring at her smiling softly, she turned her attention back to the cooker turning it off after testing the soup and seeing that it was now warm enough to eat. Carefully she poured some soup into a bowl, grabbing a spoon and the plate of cut up toast over to Oscar placing them both on the table smiling as he swivelled on Abby’s lap turning around so he could eat his soup whilst talking to his Grandma. Walking back over to the cooker Clarke grabbed another bowl pouring out some soup for Olivia before turning and placing it on the island counter in front of Olivia and Lexa smiling at her daughter she softly said;

 

“You hungry Princess?”

 

“A little”

 

“Ok…well how about you eat what you can, does that sound like a good deal?”

 

“Yes” Olivia responded keeping a hold of her Mama as she nodded her head softly looking at her Mommy “Can I stay with Mama?”

 

“While you eat?” Olivia nodded her head at the question confirming what her Mommy wanted to know. Smiling brightly at her daughter Clarke responded “Of course you can…. how about you sit on the counter while Mama feeds you, then you can stay with Mama”

 

“I want you to feed me Mommy”

 

“Me?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy’s question softly smiling at her, her hands still over her mouth at the same time, Clarke smiled before softly continuing “So you want Mommy to feed you but you wanna stay cuddling Mama at the same time?” Olivia nodded her head at the question making Lexa and Clarke smile softly at each other, looking back down at Olivia she reached up gently removing Olivia’s hands from over her mouth she softly added “You can’t cover your mouth whilst you eat ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy”

 

“Good girl” Clarke responded before beginning to move around again going and making more toast fingers seeing as Oscar had eaten them all. With every step she took she looked back checking her daughter was still ok internally thinking over what Roan had done to her daughter and thinking about why he would so such a thing, the more she thought about it the more she wanted to hunt him down and beat the holy hell out of him. 

* * *

 

**-Forty Minutes Later (13:00)-**

Clarke and Lexa had successfully gotten Olivia to eat all of the soup without any arguments, Oscar had continued to sit with Abby talking to her about everything he had done since he last saw her, along with proudly showing her his leather Jacket given to him by his Mama earlier in the day. After thirty minutes of talking to his Grandma non-stop he decided he wanted to go outside, Jake happily agreed to take Oscar outside to play catch or whatever Oscar wanted to play whilst they were out there. Once Jake and Oscar had disappeared outside Olivia told her Mama she needed the toilet so Lexa dutifully carried her daughter upstairs to the bathroom, once Olivia and Lexa were out of the room Abby waited for a few moments before she looked at Clarke and softly spoke;

 

“How are things between you two?”

 

“As good as can be expected I suppose” Clarke responded picking up the bowls and plate that she had used for Oscar and Olivia’s late lunch, placing them back in the sink and beginning to wash them up hoping her mother would drop the subject.

 

“You two seem…. closer”

 

“Mom please can we drop this subject? Before it even starts” Clarke asked, turning and watching as her Mother got up from her seat at the table and walked over to the island counter leaning against it gently looking at Clarke as she did so, folding her arms across her chest she looked at her daughter

 

“Clarke…. I know something is going on in your mind so talk”

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about”

 

“Clarke, we both know that I can tell when you’re lying about anything….and I can tell something is different, you don’t seem as angry as you did last time we saw each other”

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, things are exactly the same”

 

“Clarke….do not make me use your full name”

 

“Ok ok jeez Mom…” Clarke let out turning and looking at her Mom “Things are a little different between me and Lexa but it doesn’t mean anything”

 

“What changed between you two then? Because last time you mentioned her you hated her”

 

“I never hated her…I hated what she did”

 

“So you still think she cheated?”

 

“You don’t?”

 

“I’ve known Lexa as long as you have, and I watched your relationship blossom and change over the years but the only thing that has always stayed the same is that look in her eyes…. Like you’re the only woman in the world whenever you’re in the same room as her…whenever you would enter a room her eyes would stay on you, and the love that was in her eyes wasn’t fake or pretend”

 

“People change Mom…. love can fade away”

 

“Not with Lexa…. she still has that look in her eyes when she looks at you, we both know that if she did cheat she wouldn’t have been able to look you in the eye not even for a second, all I’m saying is if she hasn’t admitted she cheated and if she is so adamant that she didn’t cheat then maybe you need to think about asking Monroe who told her...”

 

“So you really think she didn’t cheat?”

 

“I do….and so does your father…. Lexa loves you more than she loves life, and I don’t believe that she would risk losing her son and daughter by sleeping with someone else, especially someone she knows you hate”

 

“I don’t know Mom…. why would Nia make up this lie…why would she want to break me and Lexa up?”

 

“I don’t know Clarke; why does anyone lie? Maybe she thought that Lexa would go running to her…I don’t know for sure Clarke, All I know is that you have to decide who you believe more your wife or her ex”

 

“I knew what I thought Mom, I trusted my instincts and my friend but now…now me and Lexa are spending more time together, the more I’m starting to think that she didn’t cheat, something about how angry she gets when I accuse her it doesn’t add up, what if I was wrong and she never slept with Nia…. what does that mean? I ruined my marriage and gave up on her for no reason, that my kids suffered a year without their Mama because I didn’t believe in her…”

 

“The What if’s are endless Clarke the only way you can be truly sure is to talk to Lexa, I’m sure you can tell when she’s lying…the one thing you and her haven’t done since you found out about her supposedly sleeping with Nia is talk…. Talk to her Clarke…hear her side of the story and maybe you’ll get your answers…I know you trust your friends but you have to trust Lexa as well”

 

“Your right…. I’ll talk to Lexa later on…” Before Abby could say anything to her daughter Oscar came running into the kitchen through the back door that connected onto the porch, running through the kitchen and stopping in front of Abby he looked up at her softly asking;

 

“Can you come play with me and Grandpa, Grandma?”

 

“What are you boys playing?”

 

“We’re playing Catch but Grandpa keeps throwing the ball too high”

 

“And you need me to make sure he plays fair huh?”

 

“Yes please Grandma”

 

“Ok then my handsome little man” Abby smiled out pushing herself off of the island counter ready to go outside with her Grandson before she could though Oscar moved over to Clarke quickly;

 

“Mommy, Can I have a drink when I come back please?”

 

“What drink would you like?”

 

“Can I have orange juice please?”

 

“Of course, I’ll have a glass ready and waiting for you at the table when you come back ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy…. Thank you Mommy”

 

“Your welcome baby” Clarke smiled at her son as he turned around and walked back to his Grandma reaching up and talking hold of her hand, before turning and running forward dragging his Grandma with him until they were outside. Once the door was closed she continued cleaning up the kitchen as she was before her and her mother had begun talking, once she was finished her mind wondered to Lexa and Olivia, wondering where they could have gotten too. Picking the kitchen tea towel up and drying her hands she placed the towel back on the counter, slowly walking into the living room as she entered the living room she instantly heard Lexa’s voice, stopping in her tracks she walked backwards hiding herself in the door frame of the living room listening as Lexa talked to their daughter. 

* * *

 

** In the Living Room **

After she had gotten to the bathroom Lexa had tentatively listened out for any signs that Olivia had fallen or hurt herself, she’s wanted to go in with Olivia but the little girl had insisted that she wanted to go to the toilet on her own without her Mama’s help. Once Olivia was finished in the bathroom Lexa carried her downstairs as they had reached the kitchen doorway she’d heard Clarke and Abby talking, deciding to give them some privacy carrying Olivia over to the couch she sat down in the bend in the couch taking her trainers off, she lifted her feet onto the couch stretching her legs out on them completely. Olivia gripped onto her chest a little tighter peaking up at her with a small smile. They’d spent the last ten minutes sitting in silence, Lexa softly rubbing circles on her daughters back. All of a sudden Lexa heard Olivia’s voice causing her to look down at her daughter:

 

“When are you coming home Mama?”

 

“What do you mean Baby?”

 

“When are you coming to live with us again?”

 

“Umm…” Lexa paused not knowing how to explain to her daughter that she was probably not coming home ever, especially if Clarke never believed her when she said she hadn’t cheated on her. “I don’t know princess…. Mama might never live at home again”

 

“But why Mama?”

 

“Because me and Mommy had an argument and we said some bad things to each other and we decided that at the moment it’s better to be apart than together”

 

“But you love Mommy…….and Mommy loves you”

 

“Me and Mommy do love each other, and that will never change not in a million years but sometimes even though you love someone with every piece of your heart you can’t live with them because it hurts too much” Lexa explained the best she could unaware that Clarke was listening in to every word she said

 

“Like you and Auntie Raven?”

 

“Kind of yeah, me and Auntie Raven fight all the time but it doesn’t mean that we don’t love each other. You see it’s kind of the same with me and Mommy, except it’s a tiny bit different because it’s a different kind of love and Mommy is angry at me for something that I can’t make her forgive me for”

 

“Why is Mommy Angry Mama?”

 

“I can’t tell you that baby…. but I promise that I will keep trying to get Mommy to believe me and forgive me but at the moment I can’t….and I don’t want you to get upset or angry with Mommy because it’s nothing to do with you and Oscar….and more than anything you have to be a good girl for Mommy and make sure she’s ok for me…. can you do that?” Olivia nodded her head against her Mama’s chest as she looked up at her “Good Girl”

 

“Mama?”

 

“Yes”

 

“Can we see you more?”

 

“You mean more than every two weeks?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mama’s question “I’ll talk to Mommy and ask if I can come and see you every week, even if it’s just for a few minutes before you go to bed…. how does that sound?”

 

“Can we call to say goodnight?”

 

“I don’t know princess…we’ll have to ask Mommy won’t we? …. but I can’t make any promises to you ok?”

 

“Ok Mama”

 

They were both brought out of their conversation when they heard a creek in the floorboards, the creek forced Clarke to walk into the room as to not give away that she was listening to her daughter and her ex’s conversation. Walking over to Lexa and Olivia she sat down on the free part of the couch lovingly looking at Olivia and asking;

 

“How are you feeling princess?”

 

“A little better Mommy…. I’m having Mama cuddles now”

 

“You are?” Olivia nodded her head at the question smiling brightly “Mama cuddles are great for making you feel better aren’t they?” Again Olivia nodded her head at the question “Do you want a drink princess?”

 

“No thank you Mommy”

 

“Ok baby…Lex do you want a drink?” Clarke asked turning her attention to Lexa who looked at her softly smiling and shaking her head “Ok well if either of you want anything just call me ok?” Lexa and Olivia nodded their heads at Clarke’s question, standing up and walking back into the kitchen Clarke found her phone on the side unlocking it. Something was bothering her and had been since she had talked to her Mom and she needed to talk to someone, pulling up Octavia’s number she dialled it holding the phone to her ear waiting for her best friend to answer the phone after a few seconds she call connected;

 

“Hello”

 

“Hey O”

 

“Clarkey…. Long-time no talk”

 

“I know I’m sorry I’ve been rushed off my feet with the kids and well with everything…you know?”

 

“I do…so how is my bestie?”

 

“I’m ok I suppose…. Olivia had an allergic reaction early but thankfully Lexa was here and she gave her, her epi-pen”

 

“Oh my god is she ok?”

 

“She’s fine, my mom came over and checked her out and she’s just a little tired and shaken up. But all around she’s doing fine” Clarke explained to her best friend leaning against the island counter as she continued talking to her best friend, something she hadn’t done for at least three weeks, it wasn’t that she didn’t want to talk to Octavia it was more that by time she had done everything she needed to she either too tired to do anything but sit down or she had something else that needed to be done

 

“Thank god…. So how are Roan and Lexa getting along?”

 

“Roan isn’t here”

 

“Thank god, please tell me you’ve finally seen sense?”

 

“I suppose so yeah…. I told you already that me and him weren’t really a thing”

 

“Yeah, you said that but Roan was telling everybody that would listen that you and him were in love and all that bull…”

 

“I know.”

 

“So you finally talked to him and set him straight…pun intended” Octavia laughed down the phone unable to stop herself “I’m kidding but seriously did you?”

 

“Yeah…I suppose having Lexa around helped me clear my mind”

 

“Raven mentioned something about you letting Lexa have Olivia for a few days….is that to do with it?”

 

“Kind of…. Oscar was sick and wouldn’t take any medicine without seeing Lexa so I had to give in and call her…. when she got here, something in the twin’s just changed and they were back to normal…no tantrums no screaming at me or shouting the house down for their Mama…”

 

“And all that lead to you telling Roan the true, if you will…”

 

“I suppose so…It was more Olivia throwing a tantrum”

 

“About?”

 

“You remember that picture of me, Roan and the twins in the park?”

 

“Yeah, the one he put in their bedroom”

 

“Well, Olivia placed it facing down and Lexa picked it up. I didn’t realise and when I mentioned the picture to Olivia she threw a tantrum and said that he wasn’t her daddy…then she hid in Lexa’s den…Lexa found her and managed to convince her to tell me what was wrong?”

 

“And what was wrong?”

 

“She thought that I was trying to replace Lexa with Roan…that I wanted him to be her and Oscar’s daddy…. I explained to her that wasn’t going to happen and I guess that talking to her made me realise that I only really wanted Roan around to make me feel like I wasn’t alone…. I realised that he was kind of my security blanket, he made me feel safe and like I wasn’t a failure…I never really thought about him as more than a friend even when we kissed I didn’t think of it as making out…it was always just a comforting kiss or a cuddle I was never attracted to him”

 

“He knew that right?”

 

“Of course…I told him from the beginning that I was Gay, that men never did IT for me…that’s why I didn’t understand why people thought we were a couple and he just let them think it…I guess I enjoyed having company that wasn’t a screaming four-year-old so much that I stopped myself from thinking too much into why he would stick around if there was nothing in it for him”

 

“Well I hate to say it but…. I told you so…. I told you, you were making a mistake and that you should’ve been on your own”

 

“I know…I guess I just found it way easier to have someone around, especially with the twin’s behaviour but now I realise that he may have been the reason they were acting up so much…. now Lexa is here their back to the normal happy go lucky twins that they were…in fact if I think about it whenever Roan was around would be when they acted up…”

 

“Maybe they just missed their Mama?”

 

“Well there’s no doubt about that…I just didn’t realise how much I missed her until she came over when Oscar was sick” Clarke answered honestly the silence filling the air between her and Octavia, until she shook her head slightly before asking “Enough about my drama…how are things with you and Raven?”

 

“There great as always…she surprised me with a bunch of roses and a bottle of wine yesterday…. along with a weekend away…. she said it was her way of apologising for being at work so much the last few months”

 

“She’s a romantic”

 

“That she is…I told her she didn’t need to go to all that trouble but she insisted…Sooooo under Raven’s orders I am going away for a weekend whilst she looks after Zach…. which leads me to inviting you to said weekend away”

 

“Me?”

 

“Yeah…well she got two tickets and I was going to take Ontari with me but I was thinking maybe you’d like to come…give you a break from the twins. And now that you’re on good terms with Lexa maybe she can look after the twins’ or you can ask your parents”

 

“When is it booked for?”

 

“March 11th and 12th …we’d have to check in on the 9th but the spa treatments are booked for the 11th and 12th we’d then come back on the 12th in the evening”

 

“That sounds amazing…. I’d love to O, thank you”

 

“No problem and it gives you a whole six weeks to plan and think over who can have to twins”

 

“I don’t need to think about that…however it does give me six weeks to plan what treatments your wife is going to fork out for”

 

“Great minds think alike” Octavia laughed down the line as the front door opened and Raven walked into their house living room ‘Hey baby’ she greeted as Raven walked forward leaning down and kissing her softly ‘Who you talking to?’ Raven asked her looking down at her with a questioning look ‘Clarke….She agreed to come with me on the spa weekend’ Octavia smiled as Raven leant down kissing her again this time the lips lingered a little more ‘Great…thanks Clarke’ Raven shouted down the line before placing a kiss on Octavia’s cheek as Zach’s cries echoed through the house she softly whispered to Octavia ‘I’ll take care of him’ As Raven walked towards their son’s bedroom she smiled into the phone “Thanks Babe…..I love that woman so much”

 

“I know you do…. How’s Zach doing? Lexa mentioned he was sick”

 

“He’s better…he just had that flu that was going around the nursery…...I feel bad actually because I think he may be the reason Oscar got sick and the rest of the nursery come to think of it”

 

“Don’t feel bad it happens with children…. And Oscar has a habit of not washing his hands when he’s supposed to…he’s a mini Lexa one hundred percent…plus getting sick is actually good for him, it builds up his immune system”

 

“Sure it is…you and your doctor knowledge Clarke”

 

“What I grew up with my mother, she made sure that when I was sick I knew it was a good thing…Unfortunately that information has stuck”

 

“Well at least you’re not passing all that information to the twin’s…. it’d probably fry their little brains”

 

“Your right…. there would be too many questions for my liking”

 

“I’m not looking forward to that stage with Zach”

 

“It’s terrible…especially when you don’t know how to explain it yourself” Clarke softly laughed, as did Octavia on the other end of the phone, suddenly the thought that had made Clarke call Octavia in the first place popped into her head “Hey O…do you mind if I ask you something?” She asked as she walked over to the fridge opening it up and making her way to grab a glass, pouring Oscar the glass of Orange juice he asked for before placing it on the table as she promised she would.

 

“Sure I don’t…. ask away”

 

“Remember what you told me about Nia and Lexa?”

 

“You mean what me and Monroe found out?”

 

“Yeah that…”

 

“You’re not gonna tell Raven I was involved in telling you are you? ...because she would flip if she found out I was involved….”

 

“No I’m not gonna tell her…. even though I’m not sure why she’d be so angry with you…”

 

“Clarke I told you I can’t tell you but its important ok?”

 

“Ok ...ok…. anyways, what exactly did you and Monroe hear again? …. I know I never really asked for details, well none more than she slept with her and that you and Monroe overheard Nia saying they slept together”

 

“What’s going on Clarke?”

 

“I just need to know more now…Lexa is so adamant that she didn’t cheat…and the more I spend time with her the more I think…if she hasn’t owned up by now then maybe she’s being honest…”

 

“But Cl…”

 

“I know O ok…. but even when I told her that I could forgive and we could move on as long as she admitted it she still didn’t admit to it…not once has she said that she cheated...”

 

“But why would Nia make any of this up Clarke? ….it doesn’t make any sense”

 

“I don’t know Octavia…. I just need to know more than I already do…”

 

“Ok if you’re sure….”

 

“I am…can you just tell me please?”

 

“Not on the phone Clarke…I’ll tell you in person ok? …. how about we meet up on Monday for a coffee? Raven has Zachary all day how about you?”

 

“Monday’s fine but it’ll have to be in the morning…the twin’s get out of pre-school at 2pm and I have stuff to do before that”

 

“Ok Monday, at say 11am at Ark Café?”

 

“Ok…I’ll see you then…”

 

“Ok see you Monday Clarke…. bye”

 

“Bye O”

 

Clarke ended the call locking her phone and placing it in her back pocket, she didn’t have a chance to think about Octavia’s answers or her seemingly weird need to have the conversation face to face as Lexa entered the kitchen carrying Olivia in her arms, before Lexa had a change to say anything Olivia stretched her arms out in Clarke’s direction, her eyes watering as she sniffled back her tears “Mommy” She let out holding her arms out for her Mommy almost desperately, lifting Olivia out of Lexa’s arms bringing her to her chest, feeling Olivia wrapping her arms around her neck holding onto her tightly. Soothingly rubbing Olivia’s back, she softly asked;

 

“What’s wrong princess?”

 

“She fell asleep for a bit and woke up scared about something…she hasn’t said anything but Mommy” Lexa explained soothingly brushing Olivia’s hair back as she leant against the counter staying close to Clarke and Olivia as Clarke held Olivia in her arms. She watched as Clarke turned her attention to Olivia, resting on the island counter Clarke pulled back resting her chin and mouth against Olivia’s forehead

 

“What’s wrong baby? ...you can tell me and Mama”

 

“Bad dream”

 

“Bad dream?” Clarke asked seeking confirmation; looking to Lexa she softly asked, “How long was she asleep?”

 

“Not long only about five minutes…ten at the max I think”

 

Clarke looked at Lexa taking in her response, it wasn’t like Olivia to wake up after five minutes of sleeping, she was a heavy sleeper just like Clarke was. Seeing Olivia peeking up at her she softly asked, “What was the bad dream about?”

 

“Medicine”

 

“It was about the medicine…. what medicine?”

 

“The bad medicine Mommy”

 

“The one that made you have the reaction?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy’s question, her eyes peaking up a little more than they had done. “Did you dream about when the medicine was given to you?” Olivia again nodded her head at the question “Ok…. well you know it was just a dream, Me and Mama wouldn’t let the bad medicine hurt you again, you know that?”

 

“Will he come back Mommy?”

 

“Never ever…and if he comes and knocks at the door then Mommy will beat him up and make sure he can’t get inside the house ok?” Olivia laughed softly at the comment leaning up she kissed Clarke on the cheek

 

“Thank you Mommy”

 

“Your welcome”

 

“Thank you Mama” Olivia added leaning over towards Lexa keeping her arms wrapped around Clarke’s neck holding onto her tightly as Lexa leant forward letting Olivia kiss her on the cheek as she had done with Clarke seconds before “Mommy can I have some juice please?”

 

“Of course you can princess…. what would you like?”

 

“Can I have Apple juice?”

 

“Apple juice? ….Someone’s feeling adventurous today Lex…” Clarke joked making her Lexa and Olivia laugh softly at her comment as she carried her daughter over to the fridge, opening the door and finding one of the mini cartoons of Apple Juice on the second shelf, picking it up she handed it to her daughter closing the fridge door before turning around and walking back over to the counter were Lexa was sitting their daughter down on the island counter next to Lexa, she stood in front of Olivia as the little girl held the cartoon of juice to her Mama;

 

“Can you open it please Mama?”

 

“Of course Princess” Lexa responded taking the juice from her daughter, removing the straw and placing it into the cartoon before handing it back to Olivia “There you go princess”

 

“Thank you Mama” Olivia sweetly responded holding the juice with both of her hands as she placed the straw in her mouth taking a sip before letting out a small ‘ahhh’ laughing softly and looking at Lexa then Clarke “It’s nice juice” She smiled before taking another sip, her legs moving up and down in the air before she softly looked up at Clarke removing one of her hands placing it on Clarke’s shirt gently gripping it “Mommy?”

 

“What princess?”

 

“Can I call Mama every day?”

 

“Everyday? What for?”

 

“To say goodnight before bedtime…only for five seconds Mommy”

 

“You mean five minutes?”

 

“I think so…” Olivia answered, she didn’t really know what time was or how long a day was, these were all things that she was learning in pre-school, and that her Mama and Mommy would help her learn. Looking up at her Mommy she softly continued “I just want to call and say goodnight Mommy”

 

“Olivia…remember we talked about this?” Lexa intervened, before Olivia could do more than look at her Clarke intervened softly placing a hand on Lexa’s shoulder as she looked at her and said;

 

“It’s ok…. I promised her I’d think about it….and I have….so If Mama is happy and ok with you calling her every night then Mommy is too” Clarke finished smiling at Lexa as she noticed the smile of pure happiness on Olivia and Lexa’s faces, keeping quiet for a moment she looked at Olivia and added “And I was thinking…how would you feel about staying with Mama every weekend?” The question shocked Lexa as she looked at Clarke not really sure what was going on at this moment, after a second she looked at Clarke and asked;

 

“Wait…. Clarke are you being serious?”

 

“One Hundred Percent…. They both miss you so much and unknown to you they have been throwing some major tantrums recently and I think that being around you more will even that out…mainly because I think that they missed you so threw tantrums hoping I’d call you in as back up” The comment made Lexa look to her daughter giving her a firm look

 

“Have you been being naughty for Mommy?”

 

“Only a little Mama” Olivia answered looking down at the floor avoiding looking at her Mama

 

“Olivia look at me” Olivia lifted her head looking at her Mama “You know you’re not meant to be naughty”

 

“I know Mama but we missed you loads”

 

“I know you missed me princess…. BUT…. Mommy isn’t the reason you miss me is she? ….so you can’t be naughty for Mommy, because being naughty is what?”

 

“Bad Mama”

 

“And what happens when your bad?”

 

“We get in trouble”

 

“And it’s not good to get in trouble is it?”

 

“No Mama”

 

“So are you gonna be good for Mommy?”

 

“Yes…I promise Mama”

 

“Good because if your naughty AT ALL…then you won’t get to talk to Mama at night” Looking at Clarke for a second seeing the thankful smile she continued “Because before I talk to you…I’m gonna talk to Mommy and if she tells me you’ve been naughty then no goodnight phone call ok?”

 

“Ok Mama…...I promise”

 

“Promise Mommy as well….and say sorry to Mommy for being naughty as well please”

 

Olivia looked to her Mommy still gently clutching onto her juice box as she looked up at her Mommy “I’m really sorry for being naughty Mommy, and I won’t be bad anymore I promise Mommy”

 

“You promise huh?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy’s question “Ok then…so provided that you’re a good girl and Oscar is a good boy; how would you feel about spending every weekend with Mama? ….as long as Mama doesn’t mind of course” Clarke added quickly both her and Olivia turning their attention to Lexa, who smiled at them both before looking at Clarke and responding

 

“I’m more than happy with that…I mean some Saturday’s they’d have to come into the studio with me, especially when we have a big client…but as long as everyone is happy with that, as long as your happy with that then I’m more than happy to have them every weekend. In fact, it’d be awesome for me” Lexa finished the smile on her face resembling that of a kid in a candy store.

 

“Ok then…Mama is ok with it…so what do you think Olivia? Do you wanna spend every weekend with Mama?” Clarke smiled looking down at Olivia seeing the excitement fill her daughter’s face as she began excitedly nodding her head

 

“YEAH” Olivia shouted throwing her hands up in the air squeezing her hands in excitement, unintentionally squeezing the cartoon of juice in her hand causing the apple juice to squirt out of the cartoon and onto the island counter and her arm. Stopping with her hands in the air Olivia looked at her Mommy not sure if she was in trouble or not “I’m sorry Mommy”

 

“It’s ok princess…. it was an accident” Clarke quickly responded seeing the hint of worry on Olivia’s face, she was about to turn and look for a cloth when Lexa handed her some paper towels, before she switched their positions looking at their daughter and smiling before using a wet paper towel to wipe the juice off of Olivia’s hand and arm, as Clarke wiped the spilt juice from the counter. Laughing when Olivia let out a small giggle as she looked up at her “Was that funny?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy letting out another small giggle as Abby, Jake and Oscar came back into the kitchen closing the door behind them. Oscar instantly went to the juice waiting for him on the table, climbing onto the table so that he could get to the glass with ease. Stopping after he’d drunk half of the juice he offered some to his Grandma and Grandpa, both politely refused so he continued drinking the juice until there was nothing left. Carefully he climbed down from the chair placing the glass next to him on the chair as he climbed down, once he was on the ground he walked over to Clarke and Lexa, as he was walking over to his Mom’s Abby noticed Clarke and Lexa cleaning up and asked;

 

“What happened in here? Juice fight?”

 

“No…” Clarke softly laughed at her mom’s words knowing she was referring to when her and Lexa had a water fight with juice, hence it being called a juice fight, when they were at a garden party Abby and Jake held just after they left High School. “Olivia got a little excited and squeezed the cartoon a little too tight by accident”

 

“Ok good I don’t think I can handle a juice fight….so messy and sticky” Abby laughed out as Jake, Lexa and Clarke laughed along. The twin’s just looked at each other not sure what the adults where laughing about. After a second the laughter stopped and Abby asked “So what got Olivia so excited then?”

 

“Well….” Clarke paused looking at Lexa almost asking approval Lexa softly nodded her head smiling at her ex. Clarke smiled looking down at Olivia she turned around quickly placing the used paper towels in the bin she turned around walking back to the island counter before looking at her parents and explaining “Me, Lexa and Olivia were talking about the twin’s spending every weekend with their Mama….and then I asked if Olivia would want that she said…”

 

“YAY” Oscar’s voice shouted from behind Lexa, thankfully Oscar didn’t let go of the glass in his hands but instead looked up at them his feet excitedly moving up and down on the floor. Clarke leant down taking the glass from her son, as soon as his hands were free he held them in the air in his Mama’s direction. Lexa smiled leaning down and picking Oscar up lifting him onto her chest. Oscar’s hands instantly rested on Lexa’s shoulders as he looked at her excitedly “Can we stay every time Mama?”

 

“You mean every weekend?” Lexa asked looking down at her son knowing what he meant by the sentence.

 

“Yeah…. can we Mama please?”

 

“Me and Mommy are both ok with it…so as long as you and Olivia wanna spend every weekend with me then yes you can”

 

“YAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY” The twin’s both shouted at the same time excitedly wiggling in their spots. Laughing they both looked at each other the excitement in their faces was evident for everyone in the room to see. After a second Oscar looked up at his Mama asking the question he and his twin sister were thinking of “From when Mama? …...Tonight?”

 

Lexa looked at Clarke for a second before she answered the question realising that maybe tonight wasn’t the best time to start the weekend stays “Not tonight baby…. you and your sister are still sick. BUT as long as your both one hundred percent better we can start next weekend…how does that sound?”

 

Oscar looked at Olivia getting a nod of confirmation from her, he looked at his Mama and responded “It sounds perfect Mama” He smiled out leaning forward and hugging his Mama tightly as Olivia leant forward hugging her Mama’s stomach and her twin brother’s side.  “It’s gonna be so much fun Mama” Oscar murmured into Lexa’s shoulder. After a few minutes the twin’s pulled back both turning to Clarke and at the same time saying;

 

“Thank You Mommy”

 

Leaning forward they both reached forward for Clarke, seeing what the twins were aiming to do Clarke stepped forward so neither of them fell from their place. Hugging the twins tightly knowing how much it meant to them to see Lexa, and how much it meant to Lexa to see the twins. Pulling back, she smiled when Olivia held her arms up at her lifting her daughter in the air and onto her chest smiling as Olivia rested her head on her shoulder her hand holding onto Clarke’s shirt gently. “I love you Mommy” Olivia sweetly let out as she snuggled into Clarke a little more. “I love you too Princess”


	8. Would You?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanna say a quick Thank You to everyone that's been reading this story and that has given me Kudos or has commented on a chapter :-) Appreciate you all taking the time :-)

** Chapter Eight- Would You? **

- **15:50 (Later that Afternoon)-**

It had been just over two hours since Clarke had asked the twins about them staying with Lexa every weekend, after Oscar had calmed down her and Lexa told him about Lexa calling every night to say goodnight to him and Olivia, she made sure that he understood that if he was naughty or he misbehaved then he wouldn't be able to speak to his Mama that night. He agreed, just as Olivia had, that he would be naughty anymore, and just like Olivia, he made promised his Mommy and his Mama that he'd be a good boy all the time. The whole time Clarke was telling Oscar, she was being closely watched by her parents who both had massive smiles on their faces as they watched the formerly happy family seemingly beginning to repair itself, even if it was one step at a time they were still making progress. Abby and Jake had been vocal with Clarke about their dislike of her decision to ask Lexa to leave the house, they both knew that Lexa wouldn't cheat on Clarke but they also knew that Clarke was stubborn and sometimes believed someone's word more than she believed herself or her own thoughts and feelings.

After a while of sitting in the kitchen and talking amongst each other, Abby and Jake decided to make a move so that Abby could get ready for her shift later in the day. They said their goodbye's to their grandkids before saying goodbye to Clarke and Lexa. Whilst Clarke wasn't able to hear Abby whispered a little encouragement in Lexa's ears, telling her to keep holding onto hope and not to give up on Clarke, Lexa smiled at Abby and simply replied saying she'd never give up on Clarke in a million years. After Abby let her go Jake stepped forward engulfing Lexa in a hug before whispering almost the exact same words of encouragement in Lexa's ears as Abby had, she gave him the same reply smiling as he released his hold on her. Once all the goodbye's had been said Jake and Abby left the Wood's House, the twin's excitedly waving them goodbye as they drove away from the house. Once Abby and Jake were completely out of sight Lexa, Clarke and the twins re-entered the house and the twins instantly ran to the DVD's finding a film each the quickly reappeared in front of Clarke and Lexa asking if they could watch both the films. Clarke agreed telling them that once they stopped paying attention to the film that it would be turned off, they both excitedly agreed and ran to the couch jumping onto it ready to watch the film. As Clarke went about placing the first movie, Lady and the Tramp, in the Blu-ray player and setting everything up for the twins, Oscar asked his Mama for help with something upstairs she agreed and followed him upstairs following him as he ran into his and Olivia's bedroom and pulled the duvet over off of his bed, before instructing his Mama to do the same with Olivia's smiling at the request she agreed folding the duvet and picking it up before quickly doing the same with Oscar's making it easier for him to carry.

Lexa and Oscar carried the duvets carefully down the stairs, once they were in the living room Oscar ran over to Olivia placing his duvet on the couch where he was going to sit he told Olivia to wait a minute, turning and running back over to his Mama he took the duvet cover off of her and carrying it over to Olivia and offering it to his sister. She thanked her twin with a massive smile before patting the couch and telling him the film was ready. Lexa and Clarke watched smiling and softly giggling as they watched Oscar and Olivia carefully unfold their duvet's until they were perfectly stretched out so they covered them both, both of them sitting with their upper body out of the duvet and their forearms resting on the duvet that covered their legs. Clarke pressed play on the film before walking towards the kitchen stopping for a second to make sure that the film played without any issues. Walking into the kitchen she turned smiling to Lexa who was slowly following her into the kitchen as well. Stopping at the kettle she looked back at Lexa motioning to the kettle silently asking if Lexa wanted a tea to which her ex softly nodded her head. In continued silence Clarke made herself a coffee whilst at the same time making Lexa one of her mint teas, as she finished making the two drinks she turned around seeing Lexa was sitting at the now clean kitchen table, walking over to it with the two drinks she sat down opposite Lexa sending her a small smile as she placed the mint tea in front of her getting a small 'thanks' from Lexa. After a few minutes of silence Lexa took a sip of her tea placing the mug back on the table as she looked at Clarke and genuinely said;

"Thank you Clarke"

"What for?" Clarke softly asked slowly sipping at her coffee as she looked at Lexa

"For letting me have the Twins on the weekends…and the phone calls everynight….it means a lot to me"

"You don't need to thank me Lexa"

"I do…you don't need to do anything for me, especially with what you think I do….and I know this is hard for you and has been since the start of all of this…. I just want you to know that I really do appreciate it"

"It's honestly not that big of a deal…. they miss you a lot…I already knew that but I just didn't realise how much….and I didn't realise how much having Roan around was upsetting them either…so hopefully them seeing and speaking to you more will help with the tantrums plus Roan NEVER coming in this house again of course"

"Of course" Noticing the slight look of guilt on Clarke's face Lexa added "Please don't blame yourself for what happened to Olivia…. we don't know what happen one hundred percent yet and until we do blaming each other or ourselves isn't gonna help with anything"

"I know I just feel like this is my fault…"

"It's nobody's fault Clarke…. all we can do is deal with it one day at a time…hell one second at a time"

"Thanks Lex"

"Don't mention it" Lexa honestly responded smiling at Clarke softly as she continued to sip her tea. "You know you make a good mint tea"

"Thanks…" Clarke paused for a second trying to decide in her mind whether or not she should ask Lexa that question that was in her head. This was the first time in a while that they had sat at a table and talked in a civil manner without Raven or Octavia having to be in the room. She thought about not letting the question leave her lips but she couldn't stop herself she needed to know the answer "Lex…." Seeing Lexa looking at her she continued with the question "If I said to you that you could move back in and we could go back to how we were…but you had to own up to cheating…. would you admit to sleeping with Nia?" Noticing the upset look on Lexa's face she quickly added "I'm not trying to cause an argument or start trouble between us…I just needed to ask…. you don't have to answer…."

"No Clarke I um…." Lexa started reaching over the table and gently placing her hand on top of Clarke's in an attempt to comfort her ex, taking a breath she half smiled and looked at Clarke softly continuing "As much as I wanna sit here and tell you what you want to hear….I can't, I promised you on our wedding night that I would never lie to you about something serious…and I haven't ever since that night, yeah I lied about small things like not going all out on Valentines or on our anniversary or the twin's birthday….but I've never told you a serious lie….and as much as I want to go back to being how we used to be…seeing my kids every day I can't sit here and break that promise I made to you just to get everything back…I have never EVER cheated on you…and I know you can't believe me on my word and I understand that…but you have to understand I can't tell you something that isn't the truth"

"So you never slept with Nia?"

"Never no… before we got together I dated her, you know that and you know what I did with her…and that it wasn't sex…I've told you all this before Clarke"

"I know…. but why would she lie Lexa…I don't get why"

"Neither do I…. I don't know why she would make it up and I don't know why she thinks I wanna talk to her after she lied…. all I know is that she hated that I liked you and loved you more than I loved her….is that enough for her to try and break us up I don't know…I don't know what you want me to say Clarke…"

"Nothing…. you don't have to say anything Lexa, I just wanted to know…" Clarke added gently squeezing Lexa's hand finding comfort in the brunette's touch. "And thank you for telling me again…"

"What's going on Clarke?"

"Nothing…I've just been thinking that's all and I needed to ask again…I'm sorry if it upset you"

"You didn't upset me Clarke…. I just don't want you upsetting yourself"

"I didn't…I actually feel happier than I've been in the last few months, despite Olivia's allergic reaction of course, happy is definitely not the word to describe that feeling"

"Definitely not the word" Lexa softly laughed in agreement before Clarke removed her hand from hers, standing herself up and walking over to the draw next to the entrance of the kitchen, reaching inside it she pulled something that Lexa couldn't quite see out of the draw walking back over she sat down placing her hand back in Lexa's this time though Lexa could feel there was something in between their hands

"I want you to have these back"

Lexa looked at Clarke slightly confused before Clarke removed her hand from Lexa's turning Lexa's around so that she would see what was in her hand. Looking down at her hand, Lexa's eyes came to settle on her hand and resting in her hand was her house keys, the same keys she had given back to Clarke when she moved out. Looking up at Clarke she softly asked "Are you sure?"

"I am…. Roan used them to get into the house…I realised that if someone should have them it should be you and nobody else…I know there are gonna be times where you need to drop the kids off and you need to get into the house plus if there's an emergency then you'll need to get in somehow…. I mean we both own this house even though you live somewhere else you should still have access to it…"

"Clarke I…" Before Lexa could get out any more of her sentence she was cut off by the doorbell ringing, looking at Clarke they exchanged a small smile and giggle before Clarke stood up walking towards the door thinking it was probably her dad coming back to spend time with her and his grandkids whilst Abby was at work. As she looked to the couch she noticed the twins were cuddled up together watching Lady and The Tramp, not a sound coming from either of them, opening the door her jaw dropped slightly and the anger boiled inside her as her eyes fell on Roan standing at the door. Stepping forward, she closed the door behind her making sure the twins couldn't hear anything that went on.

* * *

Lexa was sat in the kitchen waiting for Clarke to come back, after a minute or so she looked towards the front door of the house seeing it was closed and there was no sign of Clarke from what she could see. Standing up she walked into the living room seeing the twins' sitting on the couch quietly watching the film they had picked she continued to walk through the living room, as she got closer to the front door she heard Clarke's voice shouting at someone, quickly and calmly opening the door she walked through it closing it carefully and quietly behind her making sure it didn't look behind her. As the door closed she came into view of Clarke shouting at Roan as he looked down at her confused as her hand pushed repeatedly at his chest, stepping forward and between the two she placed her hand on Clarke's waist pushing her back softly before she spoke looking directly at Clarke;

"Calm down…the twins could hear"

"Clarke I have no idea what's going on here? …. whatever you think I've done I haven't" Roan defended trying to walk forward, the action on made Clarke even angrier causing her to push against Lexa's hand. Lexa quickly turned herself around so she was facing Roan, placing a firm hand on his chest she pushed him backwards creating space between them both

"Just stay back and you'll get an explanation ok?" Roan held his hands in the air deciding to listen to Lexa. Turning back to look at Clarke softly saying "Please stay calm…for the twins" Clarke nodded her head at the request, turning back to look at Roan Lexa began explaining "Earlier on when you were here, did you give Olivia any medicine?"

"This is what this is about? …. you wanna be in control of Clarke so much that you make a big deal of me giving your daughter medicine"

"So you gave her medicine?"

"Yes…It's not a big deal"

"IT IS A BIG FUCKING DEAL…YOU NEARLY KILLED HER" Clarke shouted her body pressing against Lexa's back as she launched forward forcing Lexa to reach behind her to stop Clarke getting to Roan, who at this moment was looking at Clarke in a complete state of shock

"Olivia is allergic to strawberries…. the medicine you gave her was strawberry flavoured…it gave her an allergic reaction" Lexa explain seeing the guilt and panic instantly fill Roan's face as he looked at her and Clarke

"I…I didn't…. I didn't realise…I thought it was Oscar that was allergic to strawberries…." Roan quickly explained his hands nervously flailed in air as his voice filled with pure panic "I swear to god Clarke…I would never ever want to hurt the twins…never…. I swear it…" Roan almost begged as he stepped forward his eyes looking only at Clarke ignoring Lexa, who was still in between them, completely.

"Just give her time to calm down"

Roan shook his head viciously his whole demeanour changing to one with a little more aggression and anger than moments before. Reaching his arm up he violently pushing Lexa to the side and onto the ground with a thud, something she wasn't at all expecting from him at this moment in time, Clarke's attention went straight Lexa to try and check she was ok, before she could move a Nano inch Roan's hands were on her shoulders gripping onto them hard. Clarke tried to shrug his hands off but was unsuccessful as Roan shook her;

"Clarke you have to listen to me…this is all her…trying to get you to hate me…you can't listen to her Clarke…I love you and the kids…I would NEVER hurt you or them…. this is just her trying to get between us and what we have…. we're meant to be together Clarke you know it and I know it…"

"ROAN…. what the hell are you talking about? ...I told you I'm GAY…...I DON'T love you and I never will…the thought of you touching me makes me feel sick…"

"You don't mean that Clarke…. this is just HER poisoning you against me…. She's no good for you Clarke…. she slept with my sister…she doesn't LOVE YOU Clarke…not like I can…"

"Roan…Listen to yourself…you sound Crazy…I DON'T LOVE YOU and I NEVER will…so please just LEAVE"

"NO…WE ARE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER…. Nia said it would work…Nia said that if you knew then everything would be OK and you would see that me and YOU are meant to BE TOGET…."

Before Roan has a chance to finish his sentence Lexa grabbed his wrist twisted it to the side forcing him to remove his hands from Clarke's shoulders. Once his hands were off of Clarke, Lexa stepped protectively in front of Clarke and shoved Roan in the chest with pure force sending him stumbling backwards until he fell off of the porch and onto the ground of the pathway. As soon as he hit the ground he jumped back up the venom in his eyes was clear for Clarke and Lexa, before he could take a step Lexa spoke;

"Don't even think about it…you take one more step near MY HOUSE…you try and touch MY WIFE again…and I'll put you on the floor then I'll call the police on you and get you arrested" Lexa's voice was all Roan needed to hear to know she was serious. Wiping the back of his jeans he sent her a warning look before turning around and walking away and towards his car, deciding to leave and come back to see Clarke another time. Lexa didn't remove her gaze from Roan, watching and waiting until his car was completely out of sight once it was she turned around looking at Clarke she instinctively brought her hands up to Clarke's cheeks "Are you ok? Are you hurt?" She asked before scanning Clarke's body up and down looking for any injuries, Clarke's hands came up to rest on Lexa's wrists looking into her eyes

"I'm fine Lexa…are you?"

"I'm fine just a small graze that's all" Lexa said her hands dropping from Clarke's cheeks, bringing her elbow up she showed Clarke the graze caused by her skin roughly grazing across the wooden material of the porch. It wasn't a massive graze about two inches wide and three inches long but it had a few tiny pieces of wood inside it and blood was slowly pouring out of it.

"Lex… Your bleeding"

"Clarke, I'm fine…come on let's get back inside..." Lexa let out taking Clarke's hand in her own feeling the blonde's hand shaking in her own. Opening the door, she gently pulled Clarke in with her, as she closed the door she noticed the twins were standing on the couch, Oscar had his arms around his sister holding against him and seemingly stopping her from moving. Letting go of Clarke's hand she looked at Olivia and Oscar tears running down Olivia's face as she asked;

"What's wrong?"

"Livi heard noise outside…she wanted to go outside Mama…." Oscar frantically explained looking at his Mama as he kept hold of his sister "I told her no Mama…she didn't listen so I had to hold her Mama I'm sorry"

"It's ok Oz…you were being a good boy…but you can let her go now"

Oscar did as he was told and let go off Olivia, as soon as his arms removed from his chest Olivia took off running towards Lexa "MAMA" She shouted out as she ran across the couch, as she reached the end of the couch she jumped up onto Lexa's chest, Lexa caught Olivia and soothingly rubbed Olivia's back as Olivia gripped onto her tightly "It's ok princess…Everything is ok" Lexa soothingly added adjusting Olivia in her arms so her daughter could see her

"But you and Mommy were shouting Mama" Lexa looked at her daughter and was about to speak when Clarke interjected first

"That was just me and Mama messing around…right Mama?" Clarke finished looking at Lexa for support and confirmation of her lie. She knew that she shouldn't lie to the twins ever but as their Mom she needed to make sure they felt safe and secure in their house, and the whole situation was too confusing for her to understand let alone to have to explain it to a four-year old as well. And sometimes lying was the only thing comforting for a child.

"Yeah…we were just being silly…we didn't realise we were being so noisy" Seeing Olivia looking up at her still with tearful eyes she reached up wiping away Olivia's tears and continuing "See me and Mommy were having a tickle fight…and I won so Mommy wasn't really happy and she got a little angry and that's why you heard shouting"

"Mama's not hurt?"

"No of course not…. Mommy would never hurt me would she?" Olivia shook her head at the question as Lexa purposely held her arm so the Olivia wouldn't see the wound on it "See…it's all ok…. I'm really sorry that you thought we were hurt and that you got upset"

"It's ok Mama" Olivia responded leaning forward hugging her Mama tightly. Pushing herself up she looked at Clarke sniffing softly she reached out for Clarke who accepted her daughter's arms, wrapping her arms around her daughter and lifting her out of Lexa's arms holding onto her tight as Olivia grabbed onto her just as tight.

"You ok there Oz?" Lexa asked as Clarke hugged Olivia. Oscar looked at his Mama shrugging his shoulders at her. "Remember what we said before about the brave face?" Oscar nodded his head "Were you a little scared?" Oscar nodded his head at his Mama again "Come here then…" She said as she opened her arms, Oscar looked at her and let out a breath before running full force across the couch and jumping onto his Mama's chest just as Olivia had done moments before. Lexa wrapped her arms around Oscar hugging him tightly knowing that he was probably just as terrified as his sister but was being brave so he could look after her "It's all ok now alright?" Lexa whispered into her son's ear, he nodded his head softly against her shoulder holding onto her tightly.

Clarke and Lexa held onto their twin's for a few minutes before they finally let go off them placing them on the couch standing up. Looking down at them both of the women making sure that Oscar and Olivia were completely calm now and no longer upset. "Ok…now me and Mama are going into the kitchen now…you two go back to watching your film ok?" Clarke softly said, she instantly noticed the hesitation in her kids as their faces filled with sad pouts, quickly she raised her eyebrows at them and added "None of those sad pouts ok? Everything is fine" The twin's looked up at Clarke their faces still showing a sad pout

"Nuh Huh…you both heard your Mommy no more sad faces" Lexa added looking at the twins and seeing the sad pouts leaving their faces "That's better now come give Mama kisses" Lexa laughed when the twins excitedly stomped up and down softly on their spot of the couch, leaning down gently grabbing her daughters face with both her hands she placed a loving kiss on Olivia's lips making the little girl smile, Lexa repeated the action with her son getting the same reaction from him

"And Mommy kisses too" Clarke added doing as Lexa had done seconds before leaning forward she placed a kiss on Olivia lips, placing both her hands on her daughter's cheeks she peppered kisses all over Olivia's cheeks making her daughter let out a massive dirty laugh. Letting go of Olivia's cheeks she moved over to Oscar repeating her actions with Oscar, also peppering kisses on his cheeks also getting a dirty laugh out of her son as well "Ok now back to the movie…come on Mommy wants to know how it ends, so both of you have to pay close attention"

"Can you ravind it please Mommy?" Olivia sweetly asked her Mommy, Clarke smiled knowing what her daughter actually meant to say.

"Of course I can baby…. just tell me when to stop" Clarke smiled out as Oscar and Olivia made their way over to where they had been sat before. Clarke picked up the remote and began to rewind the film waiting for the twins to tell her when to press play

"NOW MOMMY" The twin's let out at the same time laughing when Clarke faked being scared by their outburst. Pressing play Clarke leant down placing the duvets over Olivia and Oscar, before placing the remote back on top of the Blu Ray player, turning and walking towards Lexa once she reached Lexa she looked back making sure the twins were ok, and sure enough they were both engrossed in the film already, reaching down Clarke grabbed hold of Lexa's hand pulling her into the kitchen with her walking until they were at the kitchen table, moving Lexa to the seat she had been sat in moments before she pushing Lexa backwards slightly until she was sitting down. "Stay here" She simply said before disappearing upstairs, within a minute Clarke was back in the kitchen with a first aid kit in hand

"Clarke…honestly I'm fine there's no need for all of this"

"Lexa… just let me patch you up ok?"

"There's nothing to patch up Clarke I'm fine"

"Lexa…please just let me clean out your wound…otherwise it could go septic and then you'd have to lose your arm…and what use would you be as a producer if you didn't have your good arm…"

"Really…" Lexa let out raising her eyebrows and softly laughing at Clarke as Clarke nodded her head at her "Ok I'll let you clean it…but for the record I know plenty of good one armed producers…"

"You may know plenty but you wouldn't be one would you"

"Oh really now…" Lexa laughed out pulling her arm out of Clarke's reach, Clarke looked at her unimpressed trying to reach forward and grab Lexa's arm

"Lexa come on be an adult"

"I will be…if you admit I'd make an awesome one armed producer"

"You want me to lie?" Clarke joked as Lexa looked at her still holding her arm out of Clarke's reach "Fine…you would make an amazing one armed producer…the best in the business even" Clarke finally relented raising her eyebrows at Lexa "Can I clean out your wound now please?"

"Yes you may…. even though I'm not sure that I would call it a wound though…more a graze"

"Whatever just give me your arm please"

"Yes boss" Lexa responded smirking when Clarke shook her head at her comment laughing softly she moved forward gently gripping onto Lexa's forearm with her left hand whilst her right grabbed hold of the antiseptic wipe, as her hand brought the wipe closer to the graze/wound Lexa's arm started to move as if she was trying to remove it from her grip.

"Will you stop wriggling?"

"I can't help it…you know I hate this stuff"

"I know you're a wimp"

"I am not"

"You are Lexa…your all brave and strong until it comes to getting your cuts cleaned out…that's why I have to do this…" Clare stepped forward sitting herself down on Lexa's lap, looking Lexa in the eyes she moved herself slightly so that her back was facing Lexa's chest and the brunette's arm was underneath her own both her arms holding onto Lexa's arm and turning it so she could see the graze/wound. Clarke quickly went about cleaning the wound, cleaning out the wound quickly she removed the small pieces of wood without Lexa wincing or moving too much, once she was finished cleaning out the wound she placed some antiseptic cream over it, leaving it for a minute allowing it to dry. Once the cream was dry she found a big enough plaster carefully placing it over the wound, once the plaster was perfectly placed she turned herself around on Lexa's lap releasing Lexa's arm before looking at the brunette and saying "All done…. see it wasn't that bad"

"Ok…so maybe just mayyyyybbbbbeeeee I don't like having open wounds treated"

"Maybe?" Lexa nodded her head at the one worded question "Do you remember about a six months after we started dating, me you Octavia and Rae went on a double date…. you and Raven got into an argument about who was the best tree climber when you were younger…and it led to…"

"Me and her having a race to the top of the old oak tree"

"Yep…you and Rae raced to the top…you won and then Raven threw a fit saying you cheated…she spent the rest of the night sulking…she was so upset she started an argument with you after we left the cinema then started a pushing match with you and as we were walking through the same park going back home…"

"We started wrestling on the ground…"

"Yeah…she pushed you again and you had enough and pushed back saying it was her fault because she was the weaker twin…She didn't take that well and tackled you to the floor and the both of you started wrestling around on the grass, anyway ten minutes or however long it was later you broke apart and hugged it out, you both acted like nothing had happened between you…then when you were walking me home I noticed you wince or grimace whatever you prefer to call it…."

"It wasn't doing either"

"Whatever…" Clarke laughed out before continuing "Anyway, you told me it was nothing so I ignored it, once we got to my front door we kissed and when I hugged you, you pulled back wincing in pain then after some persuasion you told me what was wrong"

"Persuasion? …. you threatened to break up with me"

"That's exactly what I said Lexa persuasion …any means necessary…anyways you told me that when Raven tackled you, you landed on something and you'd been in a little pain since…when we got you inside you had a massive graze along your right side…you plain refused to let me clean it until…"

"You emotionally blackmailed me by saying if I didn't you wouldn't let me do more than kiss you for six months…. that was cruel of you"

"Well it worked so it doesn't matter…. anyway that whole story proves my point that your stubborn and don't like having your injuries looked at…"

"Ok so I don't like having my wounds cleaned out…but you don't like clowns"

"Their freaky Lexa ok…. with their stupid smiling faces…like why are they happy all the time…what are they so happy about…"

"I think it was more your dad letting you watch IT, more than it is their smiles Clarke"

"That's true…my dad didn't do much to scare me but the one thing he did do scared me forever" Clarke smiled down at Lexa looking into her eyes, for the first time in a while things felt natural between them no worries about anything or anyone, and if she was honest seeing Lexa sticking up for her the way she did just made her want to forgive Lexa for anything even if she wasn't sure if Lexa was guilty or not. "This is nice…"

"What is?" Lexa asked her hand naturally moving to rest on Clarke's waist as she looked up at the blonde

"Just hanging out…me and you without anything hanging in the air…." Clarke paused for a second finding herself getting lost in the feeling of having Lexa so close to her again "Thank you…for standing up for me against Roan"

"You don't need to thank me…I'm just sorry he put his hands on you before I knocked him on his ass"

"You don't need to be sorry Lex…. I didn't think he was going to flip like that…he just changed personalities so fast"

"Yeah that was weird…"

"And the stuff he was saying..."

"I missed most of what he said…you know on account of being knocked on my backside…. well I heard the part about him being in love with you and how your meant to be together but before that I'm clueless"

"Oh well he basically just said that it was all you, he basically said that you were setting him up so I'd hate him…he pretty much implied that you made Olivia sick to make him look bad…"

"That's insane…. has he ever changed like that in front of you before?"

"No never…. he's not even raised his voice in front of me…something is seriously off with him…" Clarke thought to herself for a second before shaking her head softly "Anyway, thank you for going all Superman on him and protecting me"

"Superman?"

"Ok Superwoman then….it was quite impressive watching you deal with him"

"It was?"

"Yeah, the way you snapped his wrist back then just pushed him off the porch and onto the garden path, it was really kind of HOT"

"HOT?"

"Yes…you were in protector mode…. your chest was puffed and your whole body tensed at the same time and way you told him not come near the house or me…it was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO impressive…you were like an alpha male in a pack of werewolves or something"

"Well I'm happy that my protective instincts please you"

"That they do" Clarke laughed out her hand reaching up she tugging a piece of Lexa's hair behind her ear as she looked down at her, the air between them was suddenly thick and filled with tension, not just any tension and she knew that…it was sexual tension the same sexual tension that had always existed between them

"How um…how are your shoulders? …. He didn't hurt you did he?"

"No I don't think so…." Clarke let out trying to look at her shoulders to see if they were bruised "Their not marked are they?" She asked Lexa softly looking down at her, Lexa nodded her head softly at her before she reached up gently pulling back the material of Clarke's t-shirt exposing her shoulders, looking over the skin Lexa's hand gently ran over Clarke's skin causing the blonde's breathing to uncontrollably slow down, the feeling of Lexa's hands on her skin like this wasn't something she'd felt in over a year, trying to control herself she took in a deep breath as Lexa continued to look over her shoulders, leaning herself forward slightly to look at the back of Clarke's shoulders her breath unknowingly sending a hot shiver down Clarke's spine. As she slowly oved herself backwards she found her and Clarke were face to face, Clarke's hands had found their way to rest against Lexa's stomach playing with the material of Lexa's shirt trying to distract her mind, as Clarke realised they were face to face she looked up a little her lips and Lexa's ended up only an inch away from each other's, both of them took deep breaths in as they tried to decide what they should do. Clarke was the first to decide pushing her thoughts aside she leant forward wanting to feel Lexa's lips against hers.


	9. Tell Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanna say Thank you to everyone that's left a comment on the last chapter. Hope you all enjoy this chapter, I will be uploading another one later today or tomorrow morning.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy this chapter :-)

** Chapter Nine-Tell Me **

Clarke and Lexa’s foreheads gently rested against each other’s as their lips moved closer before their lips could connect Lexa moved her head back slightly keeping their foreheads connected but stopping their lips from meeting letting out a sharp breath she softly said;

 

“Clarke…” Closing her eyes for a second internally kicking herself for stopping herself from getting what she wanted since the day Clarke asked her to leave the house “This isn’t a good idea” At the words Clarke quickly went to remove herself from Lexa’s lap only to be held in her place by Lexa’s quick hands “Clarke…don’t run please” Clarke didn’t fight Lexa’s grip but instead looked down at her own lap not looking Lexa in the eyes “It’s not that I don’t wanna kiss you…because believe me I really do….but it’s not fair on either of us, you know I love you and in an you made me crazy with how amazing you are kind of way, not a friendship way….I wanna move back home and I want us to be together again but I’m not sure you do…”

 

“I do want that…I just….”

 

“You just what Clarke?”

 

“My brain is so jumbled at the moment I can’t seem to work out what I want” Clarke lifted her head up turning and looking at Lexa, bringing her left hand up to gently caress Lexa’s cheek as she continued speaking “I miss you so much, and not because I’m not used to being alone but because I still love you, and I don’t think I can change that…I don’t think I want to….but more than anything I’m dealing with the possibility that I made a mistake and we lost a year as a family because I didn’t trust you” Clarke explained looking into Lexa’s eyes and seeing that same green colouring that she fell in love with “I was so sure that what I was told was true and that you would lie to hide the truth that I didn’t think about the possibility that Nia or Roan or however could be trying to get in-between us…I didn’t even think that was a possibility at the time to be honest, so much so I didn’t even give you a chance to defend yourself properly, I shut myself down and even worse I shut you out of our lives…”

 

“Clarke…”

 

“Let me finish please…..I knew that I’d forgive you and I thought that it’d be because you’d convince me to forgive you without admitting anything to me…I just got so into my own mind and I’ll let Roan get into my head as well…” Clarke let out as tears starting escaping from her eyes running down her cheeks, removing her hand from Lexa’s cheek she gripped onto her other hand nervously clasping her hands together “I thought he was being a good friend and trying to make me feel better but now I realise that he was just trying to get into my head….and I let him”

 

“Clarke…. what do you mean you let him?”

 

“He was the one that suggested filing for divorce…. he convinced me that you’d try and kick me out of the house and take the kids from me…that you’d call me a bad mom and say I was unfit to look after them…. He was the one that suggested the monthly stays and the fortnightly days with the kids…I just let him get into my head...” Clarke again lowered her head avoiding looking at Lexa the shame and guilt she was feeling was overwhelming at this moment in time

 

“Hey…Clarke look at me…” When Clarke continued to look at her hands, Lexa reached up with her right hand gently lifting Clarke’s chin up until the Blonde was looking her in the eyes “None of what you chose to do was wrong, your weren’t played or tricked by anyone, you made the best decision you could….I don’t hold it against you…so you shouldn’t hold it against yourself…”

 

“You don’t hate me?”

 

“I don’t think I could ever hate you…even if you did something that warranted hate…which for the record I don’t think you ever could” Lexa honestly replying smiling up at Clarke as the blonde’s face filled with a small smile “So please stop seconding guessing yourself and letting that idiot get into your head ok?”

 

“Ok”

 

“Good…” Lexa smiled back releasing her hands from around Clarke’s waist, Clarke smiled at her before quickly standing up and taking a few steps towards the island counter. Lexa noticed the tenseness in Clarke’s body language as the blonde kept her back to her, standing up she stepped forward standing behind Clarke she slowly turned the blonde around so they were face to face, without a word she wrapped her arms around Clarke, who instantly wrapped her arms around Lexa’s waist burying her head in Lexa’s shoulder breathing in the smell of her ex, the woman who she missed more with every breath she took, the same woman she was still technically married to by law, the same woman she wanted so badly to come home. Lexa just kept her arms wrapped tightly around Clarke’s torso, resting her cheek gently on the top of Clarke’s head taking in the smell of Clarke’s shampoo and conditioner, the same one she’d used for years upon years ever since they started dating.

 

The two women held onto each other tightly like there was no tomorrow, like if they let go of each other then the moment would end and they’d go back to hating each other. The minutes flew past them both, neither one releasing that time had continued moving on without them. Lexa finally pulled back bringing her hands to rest on Clarke’s neck just near her jawline, gently caressing Clarke’s jawline with her thumbs she leant forward placing a gentle kiss on Clarke’s cheek, her lips lingering against Clarke’s cheek for a few seconds more than they perhaps should have. As Lexa pulled back looking into Clarke’s eyes she debated whether or not she was right to stop Clarke kissing her, but before she had a chance to say anything to Clarke and before Clarke had a chance to say anything to her, their attention was brought to the kitchen doorway when they both caught sight of Olivia standing there looking at them both, stepping back slightly to create space between her and Clarke, Lexa looked at her daughter smiling before she asked:

 

“Hey princess…what can we do for you?”

 

“Can you watch the film Mama?” Olivia sweetly asked nervously twirling from side to side on her feet as she held her right hand over her mouth with her forefinger resting on her lips

 

“Of course I can”

 

“And you too Mommy”

 

“Are you asking for some Woods family time?”

 

“Yes Mama”

 

“Ok then…” Looking to Clarke for confirmation, when Clarke nodded her head smiling brightly at her she turned back to Olivia, walking forward “Let’s do it” She half shouted quickly moving forward and lifting Olivia into the air without stopping her walk, Olivia let out an excited squeal/giggle as Lexa caught her against her chest and carried her to the couch closely followed by a smiling and seemingly happy Clarke.

 

Lexa and Clarke sat with the twins’ watching the rest of The Lady and The Tramp, Oscar was sat in the corner with Lexa after she had placed Olivia on the couch and sat herself down Oscar had crawled the small space between them and sat down on her lap stretching his legs out over Lexa’s as she removed her trainers and stretched her legs out on the couch in front of her. Clarke laughed at the sight in front of her as she watched Lexa lift Oscar’s duvet until it covered her and her son. As Clarke sat down Olivia quickly climbed onto her Mommy’s lap adjusting herself once she was comfortable, resting her upper body against Clarke’s chest adjusting herself so that she could see the film as it continued to play, Clarke did as Lexa did and brought Olivia’s duvet over them covering them both allowing them to snuggle up more.

 

Once the film was finished Lexa stood up and placed Beauty and The Beast in the Blu-Ray player pressing play and siting back down with Oscar. As she sat down Clarke moved herself shuffling her position on the couch slightly, as Clarke finished moving Lexa sent her an amused look earning her a roll of the eyes from Clarke, neither of them noticing or caring that Clarke’s movements had resulted in them being a little closer together. They both turned their attention to the film watching the movie, as the movie continued on and on Clarke and Lexa’s hands moved naturally closer together, as the film was about half way through Olivia bounced on Clarke’s lap making Clarke laugh slightly and move her hand to the left more. Her hand landed on Lexa’s and she instantly removed it not looking at Lexa in case she thought she’d done it on purpose. Continuing to look forward keeping her attention on the film they both ignored the slight tension between them both as they sat on the couch with their kids. The film came towards the end with Beauty dancing the films theme with the beast, as the two cartoon characters danced together on the screen Olivia and Oscar leant forward both giggling softly and clapping their hands together as they looked at the screen and the scene in front of them, as the films theme played in the background the twin’s began singing along to it, both Lexa and Clarke sat watching and laughing at the twins…they twins remained engulfed in the film until the credits rolled and they both looked at Lexa and Clarke:

 

“Did you both enjoy that huh?” Lexa asked looking at the twins’ already knowing that they wanted to watch another film “Was that film good?” She asked, when neither of them answered her first question

 

“Yeah” The answered at the same time “Another” The added looking sweetly at Clarke and Lexa

 

“Not right now…” Lexa answered looking at the clock noticing it was now 6pm and was nearing the twin’s bedtime, she knew that Clarke would more than likely want to give the twins their dinner now before even thinking about letting them watch another film. Looking to Clarke she softly smiled asking “Do you they need a bath tonight?”

 

“No, I think we can let them off tonight…. but they do need to go get in their pyjamas...” When the twins faces filled with sadness and they went to protest she continued “Mama isn’t going anywhere…you two go get changed into your pyjamas and I’ll make some dinner, then we can all sit and watch another film and after that film Me and Mama will put you to bed ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy” The both responded smiling brightly at each other, jumping down off of the couch at the same time they both walked towards the stairs, Oscar disappeared up the stairs and out of sight his excited giggle fading away. Olivia on the other hand stopped at the bottom of the stairs turning around she looked at Lexa like she wanted to say something. Sensing what was wrong Lexa stood up and walked over to Olivia kneeling down in front of her she softly said;

 

“I won’t go anywhere princess I promise” Olivia smiled at Lexa quickly hugging her Mama before she turned and ran up the stairs to join her brother. Standing up Lexa turned around looking at Clarke “Thanks for letting me stay so late…” She instantly noticed the nervous look on Clarke’s face “Unless you want me to leave?”

 

“No it’s not that it’s…”

 

“What Clarke?”

 

“Would you mind staying the night?” Clarke noticed the unsure look on Lexa’s face, standing up and walking over to Lexa she softly added “You can stay in the guest room or I can and you can sleep in our room…. It’s just if Roan comes back…I’d umm…I’d feel safer with you here”

 

“As long as you’re sure you want me to stay”

 

“I am…you’d be helping me out”

 

“Then I’ll stay”

 

“Thanks…I still have some of your clothes upstairs so you’ll have stuff to wear”

 

“Thanks Clarke….so anyway what’s for dinner? …anything I can help with?”

 

“Sure” Clarke smiled before walking off in the direction of the kitchen to cook dinner for her Lexa and the twins’ something she hadn’t done for a long time. Clarke and Lexa went about making the dinner for themselves and the twins, Lexa did as she was told by Clarke smirking at the bossy nature that emerged everytime Clarke cooked, within Twenty-Five minutes they had finished making four bowls of pasta with Chicken in a Tomato puree sauce. Clarke placed the last of the bowls on the island counter before looking at Lexa and curiously saying “I wonder why the twins are taking so long?”

 

“I’m not sure…How about you get the drinks ready and I’ll go check on them?”

 

“Sounds like a good plan”

 

“Awesome” Lexa smiled at Clarke softly as the blonde smiled back at her with just as much brightness as Lexa’s smile. Turning and walking out of the kitchen Lexa walked towards and up the stairs continuing until she reached the twins bedroom, as she reached the door she laughed softly to herself when she heard the twins whispering to each other, walking into the room she kept her face stern and serious as she noticed Olivia and Oscar were still in their clothes kneeling up on Olivia’s bed, as they noticed their Mama in the room they both looked in her direction their hands shooting behind their backs, she looked at Oscar’s hands firmly behind his back clearly hiding something from her looking at him she firmly asked “What are you hiding?”

 

“Nothing Mama” Oscar quickly responded straightening his back and adjusting himself slightly on the bed

 

“Nice try Oz…but you remember it’s bad to lie to Mama right?”

 

“But…”

 

“No buts Oscar…now show me what your hiding”

 

Oscar looked to his twin sister for help and silent advice, shaking his head at her signalling he didn’t want to show their Mama what was hidden behind his back. “Show Mama Oz…. we’re not meant to be bad.” Olivia said to her brother her Mama’s warning from earlier in the day ringing in her ears. Oscar though for a second his chin contorting as he moved it with every thought he had. As Lexa took a step forward he looked at her, slowly he moved his hands from behind him placing them between him and his Mama revealing a piece of paper folded over once to make a card of sorts. Looking at the piece of paper in Oscar’s hands Lexa reached forward taking the card from her son she looked at it closely, Oscar and Olivia had apparently been upstairs drawing for the last twenty-five minutes, looking over the picture they had drawn Lexa took in the drawing of two children, one boy and one girl, along with a bigger/older woman in the background of the card was a house with a porch in the front of it, green trees scattered around behind it with some bushes in front of the people in the picture “Open it Mama” Olivia’s voice encouraged as the twins looked up at her smiling toothy grins at her, smiling she opened the make shift card smiling as her eyes feel on the crayon written words on the card ‘Mama, We love you mazillions and balllions Olivia and Oscar’ her eyes welled up as she read the messy crayon written words of her children, looking down at them she sniffed back tears before she spoke;

 

“Thank you both, I love it”

 

“Really Mama?” Oscar asked looking up his Mama with questioning eyes

 

“Yes…..it is the best card I have ever been given” At Lexa’s words both Olivia and Oscar’s faces filled with happiness and joy as they excitedly bounced on the spot on Olivia’s bed “Now come on, dinner is ready and Mommy is waiting for us…so pyjama time” The twins smiled at their Mama as she stepped forward hugging them quickly before gently lifting them and laying them down on the bed, leaving Olivia on her bed she lifted Oscar in the air carrying him over to his bed placing him down on the bed. As she looked at them both again she smiled when they both, at the same time, crawled up their beds to their pillows lifting their pillows up finding their pyjamas lifting them from underneath the pillows.

 

They both quickly got pressed while Lexa waited patiently for them, once they were both dressed they carefully jumped off of their respective beds walking and standing in front of their Mama looking up at her sweetly. Lexa now noticed that Olivia and Oscar were wearing the pyjamas she had brought them months ago, their pyjamas were matching in everything but colour, the pyjama trousers with covered in different kinds of dinosaurs all the way, the tops had a picture of an Oviraptor on the front of them both sleeves were solid colours no dinosaurs or writing on them. The only different between Olivia and Oscar’s pyjamas were that Oscar’s was dark blue and Olivia’s was a light red. Lexa smiled at them both before leaning down her card still in her hand, smiling at them both she softly said;

 

“Thank you for my card”

 

“Your welcome” The twins answered at the same time smiling at their Mama

 

“Let’s go eat before Mommy sends out a search party” Lexa opened her arms wide, the twins lunged forward hugging her tightly at the same time. Lexa wrapped her arms around them both holding onto them tightly she stood up lifting them into the air with her, keeping a firm hold on the twins as they giggled softly against her she carried them out of their bedroom and downstairs until they were in the living room, carefully kneeling down she placed them both on the floor she looked at them both softly saying “Go sit down and I’ll get dinner” The twins excitedly giggled before turning around and running over to the couch jumping up onto the couch both of them sitting and waiting patiently. Lexa stood herself up walking into the kitchen and softly smiling at Clarke showing her the card “They got distracted making this…. but their changed and waiting patiently in the living room for their dinner now”

 

Clarke smiled as she looked at the card, the twins writing had improved so much and so had their drawing. Looking up at Lexa she softly said “Well let’s get this food into them before they run off and get distracted” Lexa laughed in agreement picking up the two smaller bowls with spoons placed in them, she carried them into the living room giving one bowl to each of the twins before walking back to the kitchen and picking up their drinks carrying them into the living room placing them on the table before carefully moving the table so it was in front of the twins. She smiled as they thanked her politely as they began eating their food. Lexa was about to walk into the kitchen again when as she turned Clarke walked into the living room carrying a glass of orange juice and a bowl, stopping in front of Lexa she handed them over to the brunette smiling softly at her, before turning around and walking back to the kitchen to retrieve her food and drink. Lexa walked over to the twins and sat down next to Olivia who was closest to the front door, as she sat herself down Clarke re-entered the room walking over to the three Wood’s family members she questioned where to sit in her mind, that was until Oscar’s voice called out to her;

 

“Sit with me Mommy”

 

Clarke smiled happily walking over and complying with her son’s request, sitting down next to him she smiled even more when he snuggled into her a little. Reaching forward she grabbed the remote control pressing the Netflix button she selected the kids section of the app carefully moving along until she found the film she was looking for, pressing play she placed the remote down next to herself before beginning to eat her food, in the corner of her eye she noticed that Olivia and Oscar were both looking at Lexa waiting for her to start eating, she giggled softly in amusement when Lexa took her first bite of food and the twins automatically started eating their food at the same time. Ignoring the pure cuteness of her children she concentrated on eating her food and watching the film, soon enough her bowl was empty and she was completely full, laying herself back even more she smiled when she noticed Oscar had finished his food as well reaching down she took his bowl from his lap and placed it inside hers, in the corner of her eye she could see Lexa doing the same thing for Olivia. Clarke’s attention was fully on the film when Oscar leant forward wrapping his arms carefully around Clarke’s waist, at the same time Olivia leant into Lexa and did the same thing, both their hands tentatively holding on the clothing underneath them.

 

Not wanting to disturb the twins both Lexa and Clarke decided not to move from their places both instead opting to stay where they were. The film played on and nearly an hour later Clarke looked down at her son, her eyes landing on the sleeping image of Oscar, his head resting on her chest as his hands clung to the material of her t-shirt his breathing was level and steady. The image of her son filled her with love, he looked so innocent and carefree like nothing in the world could harm him. Looking to her right she noticed that Olivia was also asleep unlike Oscar she had at some point climbed onto Lexa’s lap and was sitting on her Mama’s lap her head resting on Lexa’s chest as her hands gripped tightly onto the material that rested over Lexa’s stomach. As Clarke’s eyes moved from her daughter to her ex she instantly noticed that Lexa’s attention was on their son laying against her chest, as the smile spread across Clarke’s face Lexa’s eyes travelled from their son to Clarke’s face their eyes locked and they smile spread across both their faces, they continued to look at each other for minutes on end before Lexa finally spoke keeping her voice lowering than normal so she didn’t wake up the twins;

 

“I’ll get this one to bed then come down for Oscar”

 

“I can carry him up”

 

“No…it’s ok let me carry him…let me give you a break” Lexa returned smiling softly at Clarke who smiled back and softly nodded her head in agreement. Giving Clarke a small nod in return Lexa carefully moved forward wrapping her arms protectively around her daughter before she stood up, as Lexa stood up Olivia softly moved in her arms moving herself in her sleep until her head was tucked in Lexa’s shoulder her hands moving to hold a little higher on Lexa’s shirt. Lexa stood still for a minute making sure that Olivia hadn’t woken up, once she was sure her daughter was still asleep walked towards the stairs carefully climbing them and walking into the twin’s bedroom she walked over to Olivia’s bed remembering that Olivia’s duvet was downstairs she laid her daughter down on the bed making sure she slowly removed her hands as to not wake Olivia up. Smiling at the image of her sleeping daughter Lexa shook herself from her thoughts turning and quickly walking down the stairs she walked over to the couch grabbing the duvet, looking over at Clarke she softly said “I’ll just take this up and I’ll be back for Oz” Clarke smiled and nodded her attention turning back to their son as she ran her fingers through his hair as she just looked at him. Once Lexa was back in the twin’s bedroom she carefully placed the duvet over her daughter laughing softly to herself as Olivia unconsciously moved under the covers curling into them hugging them as if they were a person, Lexa watched Olivia for a few minutes before she turned around walking out of the room and down the stairs back to the couch where Clarke was still holding their sleeping son.

 

Moving over to Clarke she knelt one of her knees on the couch to steady herself as she leant forward carefully placing her hands underneath her son’s arms, quickly lifting him from Clarke’s chest and turning him in the air effortlessly until his chest was against hers. Out of the two twins Oscar had always been the lightest sleeper, so him staying asleep when being moved was always a problem however, much to Lexa and Clarke’s surprise Oscar kept sleeping his body adjusting itself to hold onto his Mama his head doing just as Olivia’s had and resting on his Mama’s shoulder. Doing as she had done with Olivia, Lexa stood steal for a minute making sure that her son hadn’t woken up. Once she was sure she carried Oscar up the stairs not stopping until she reached the twin’s bedroom, once she reached the bedroom she walked into it walking up to Oscar’s bed she placed him carefully and slowly onto the bed, taking more time than she had done with Olivia in case Oscar woke up. Once she had successfully placed Oscar in his bed she looked down at him watching him carefully, she was pulled out of her thoughts when she felt someone behind her turning around she saw Clarke entering the room with Oscar’s duvet, smiling as her ex handed her the duvet she turned back carefully and slowed placing the duvet over her -thankfully- still sleeping son, just as Olivia did, once the duvet covered him Oscar unconsciously moved underneath the duvet curling up underneath it and hugging the material close as if it was a person.

 

After watching the twins sleeping for a few minutes Clarke and Lexa exited the bedroom closing the door behind them, without a second thought they both made their way downstairs and back to the living room, picking up the empty bowls and glasses that now rested on the living room table in front of the couch. They carried the bowls and glasses into the kitchen in complete silence, both walking up to the sink and placing the items inside it. Lexa stood next to Clarke looking at the blonde contemplating what she could say to her, she decided to just go with a simple ice breaker; “So you wash I’ll dry?” Clarke looked at her nodded her head raising her eyebrows at the same time “What? …. you always wash and I always dry…”

 

“You’re such a charmer”

 

“What can I say it’s a gift….” She laughed as Clarke shook her head leaning forward and turning on the taps to run the water before leaning forward and picking the washing up liquid pouring some of the substance into the water until it began to bubble. “You know we could just use the dishwasher…” Clarke turned and looked at her turning her head to the side slightly raising her eyebrows and looking at her in an almost sultry way “What…. that’s what the dishwasher is for…”

 

“You want to put on the dishwasher…which takes an hour plus change…for what 8 items, really Lexa?”

 

“What? …. it’s a dishwasher, it’s for washing dishes and other items like glasses and cutlery”

 

“We can put the cutlery in there but I’ll hand wash and dry the others if you just don’t wanna put in the work”

 

“Oh…. that sounds like a challenge” When Clarke just raised her eyebrows at her and turned her attention back to the sink, turning the water off and beginning to wash the used items, Lexa grabbed the kitchen tea towel straightening her back she looked at Clarke moving closer to the kitchen sink next to her ex “This is gonna be the best dish drying you’ve ever seen” Clarke laughed at the comment as she began washing the dishing her, Lexa and the twins and used.

 

Clarke and Lexa laughed and talked away as they washed and dried the dishes it was almost like it used to be with them except for that niggling thought in the back of Clarke’s mind that everything she had believed about Lexa could be wrong, that everything they had been through all the heartbreak and turmoil could have been for nothing. The more she thought about it the more she didn’t care about her own feelings but Oscar and Olivia’s, they had been through so much over the months since Lexa had left and both of them had started to misbehave, throwing tantrums, screaming the house down and on a very rare occasion they would raise their arms angrily in the air as if they were going to hit their her, they never would but the anger was clear in their faces as they would look up at her. Everytime they gave her that look it would break her heart a little more, she knew that no four-year old should have that much emotion and anger clear in their face but yet both of her four-year olds did.

 

But that look never once appeared on their face when they were around Lexa, when they were around their Mama the only emotions they experienced were happiness and sadness, pure happiness at having their Mama near them in any form and pure sadness when they had to say goodbye to her. The more she thought about it the more the blamed herself for not trusting Lexa, and the more she needed to speak to Octavia and find out what she had heard word for word. Shaking her thoughts out of her head she looked at Lexa who was now looking at her with an intrigued look on her face, handing Lexa the last plate she softly asked;

 

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

 

Lexa contemplated her answer for a second, she had two options one was ask Clarke what she really wanted to ask her and the second was to ask her ex something else completely and leave her to her own thoughts knowing Clarke was internally blaming herself for something “Was that the best drying you’ve ever seen or what?” She asked opting for option two, hoping that she could distract the blonde from her thoughts long enough for Clarke to just relax.

 

“It wasn’t bad”

 

“Wasn’t bad? …it was amazing”

 

“If you say so”

 

“Your so mean Clarke” Lexa joked seeing the smile on Clarke’s face, the smile that matched the small giggle that the Blonde let out “So what do you wanna do now? …. please tell me you don’t go to bed at half seven”

 

“I don’t…I usually clean up then relax and watch TV until I am beaconed to my bed by pure exhaustion”

 

“Sounds like fun…. But how about we watch a film together?”

 

“Depends on whether I get to pick the film or not?”

 

“You can pick the film, as long as it’s not depressing”

 

“Deal”

 

Lexa smiled at the happiness in Clarke’s face watching as the blonde placed the kitchen tea towel on the counter next to the sink. She watched as Clarke went over to the fridge opening it and pulling out two bottles of diet coke handing one to Lexa before turning back into the fridge reaching inside it before pulling out two chocolate sundaes she closed the fridge door before walking over to the cutlery draw opening it and removing two small spoons she smirked handing one sundae to Lexa before picking up her bottle of diet coke and turning walking into the kitchen. Lexa simply laughed before following the Blonde into the living room, walking over she sat down beside Clarke internally happy that Clarke seemed to have forgotten all about her blaming herself for anything. After about ten minutes of looking through films on Netflix Clarke finally chose a film, and much to Lexa dismay Clarke had opted for watching Titanic, Lexa had gone to protest Clarke’s decision but Clarke as usual gave her the puppy dog eyes and she gave in agreeing to watching the film.

 

They both watched the film in silence eating their sundaes and drinking their diet cokes without exchanging any words, not that Lexa didn’t try to speak but everytime she did try to say a word Clarke would send her a firm look and shh her the whole time not taking her eyes off of the film on the TV screen. The film played out and at the infamous sex in the car scene Lexa couldn’t help but look only at Clarke and how the blonde reacted to the scene, and as always the Blonde had a smile on her face smirking as she watched the scene play out. As the film continued to play out Lexa found herself paying more attention to the Blonde than she was to the film itself, she couldn’t help it she wanted to make sure that Clarke didn’t get upset or emotional and the only way she could be sure of that was to watch her, along with the face that she loved watching the Blonde she always had done. As the Titanic sunk and Rose and Jack were stranded in the sea, Clarke’s eyes began to fill with tears as she watched the scene unfold on the screen, as Clarke got more and more caught up in the scene Lexa shuffled closer to the Blonde wrapping her arm around Clarke who accepted the embrace resting her head on Lexa’s shoulder as her hands came to rest on Lexa’s outer thighs. They stayed like that for the rest of the film and as the credits rolled Clarke looked up at Lexa asking if she wanted to watch another film, not wanting to remove herself from Lexa’s embrace, Lexa agreed and Clarke chose another film, this time opting for The Nutty Professor knowing it was one of Lexa’s favourite comedy movies.

 

They watched that film in silence neither saying a word but instead enjoying being in each other’s company, the film played out and soon enough the credits rolled and Clarke had no idea where the time had gone. She had forgotten how comforting and relaxing being in Lexa’s embrace could be to her, forcing herself to sit up and remove herself from Lexa’s arms she smiled at the brunette looking at the clock and noticing it was now nearly 11pm and whilst that wasn’t late for some people she’d been awake since 6:30 thanks to Oscar and after the worry that the day had thrown at her she couldn’t wait to lay in her bed and just relax. The both agreed it was time to go to bed, turning off the TV and all appliances that needed to be switched off, they made their way up the stairs Clarke told Lexa to follow her into her bedroom once inside she walked over to the chest of drawers near the bathroom suite opening one of the draws she reached inside it pulling out a pair of shorts and a t-shirt that Lexa recognised as her own. Lexa accepted the two items with a smile before her and Clarke both awkwardly said goodnight to each other neither of them knowing whether to hug or not, they both opted for a weird wave and a simple verbal goodnight. Lexa turned and walked out of the bedroom closing the door behind her to leave Clarke in peace as she thought of it in her mind.

 

Once she was in the guest room Lexa got changed and laid down in the bed, instantly feeling uncomfortable in the bed it wasn’t that it wasn’t a comfortable bed or that she didn’t want to be in the room. It was more that whenever she’d slept in this house it had been when she lived there when her and Clarke were doing great, she’d only slept with Clarke in their bed or she’d fallen asleep with one of the twins and ended up sleeping with one of them in their bed, but other than that she hadn’t ever slept in the guest room, and the more her mind ran off with itself the more she found it almost impossible to fall asleep thinking about all that had changed and all that was wrong with her life at the moment. As she thought about the bad times, Oscar and Olivia popped into her head they happiness that they had when they saw her, the smiles on their faces and the way they would say ‘Mama’ with such pride. She knew that they were the reason she hadn’t given up hope yet, no matter what they were a part of her and no matter what artist she helped produce a track or how many of them tracks went to number one, the twins would always be her greatest achievement. After a while her mind kept on the twins reliving moments in her head, from their first words to their first steps and everything before and after, soon enough she fell asleep thinking about everything related to her children.

 

Unknown to Lexa, in their old bedroom Clarke had the same problem no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t seem to settle her mind knowing Lexa was so close to her. When she got into the bed laying on what used to be Lexa’s side of the bed she was tired, but then she heard the guest room door close and no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t stop thinking about how much she’d missed being in Lexa’s arms over the months that had passed, those thoughts lead to her thinking about the possibility that Lexa hadn’t done anything wrong and she’d believed someone she hated instead of the person she had been in love with for over a decade. Just as Lexa had done she found herself thinking about the twins, thinking about every moment since they were born, all the moments she had shared with Lexa, moments that made her smile everytime she thought about them. Soon enough she had drifted to sleep, hours later she found herself waking up instinctively she slowly opened her eyes blinking them a couple of times until her vision was clear, rolling to her right her eyes landed on Oscar standing near her bedroom door, he was standing with his hands rolled up in the lower half of his top rolling to the edge of the bed Clarke removed herself from the covers placing her feet firmly on the floor, turning on the lamp before walking over to her son and leaning down in front of him, looking at the clock she noticed it was 2:10am in the morning looking back to Oscar she noticed the sad expression on his face;

 

“What’s wrong baby? Why are you awake so late?”

 

“I had a bad dream Mommy”

 

“You did?” Oscar nodded his head at her, moving onto her knees she shuffled forward holding her arms up to him. Oscar quickly moved forward quickly wrapping his arms around her neck as he gently rested his head on Clarke’s shoulder “My poor little prince…. you wanna snuggle with Mommy?” She asked, knowing that letting Oscar was still sick and it made him feel better when they snuggled in bed together. Oscar nodded his head against his Mommy’s shoulder “Ok then…it’s Mommy and Oscar snuggle time then” She softly responded lifting Oscar up with her as she stood herself up, walking over to her bed she laid Oscar down on the side of the bed that she didn’t sleep on, helping her son under the covers she watched as he crawled over to the side he knew she slept on waiting to snuggle with his Mommy. As she went to walk around the bed to climb in next to Oscar, Clarke heard footsteps on the floor outside, turning around she noticed Olivia walking into the bedroom tears streaming down her cheeks as she had one hand on her chin whilst the other was rubbing her stomach her t-shirt clenched in her fist, stopping in her tracks Clarke turned and walked back over to her daughter leaning down in front of her wiping away her daughter’s tears “Princess what’s wrong?”

 

“Feel sick Mommy….”

 

“Sick like before?” Olivia nodded her head at the question, Clarke moved forward trying to hug her daughter only for Olivia to step back “What’s wrong baby?”

 

“Want Mama”

 

“Mama is sleeping baby, why don’t you come snuggle with me and Oscar huh?”

 

“Nooooo….” Olivia moaned out, the tears beginning to flow quicker than seconds before “I want Mama” She cried out before her moan turned into a full on cry, Clarke watched as Olivia burst into tears in front of her she wanted to go wake up Lexa but she wasn’t sure about it, moving forward she again went to hug Olivia only for her daughter to move again, gently placing her hands on Olivia’s arms to hold her in place to try and calm her down before she had a chance to say a word to Olivia, a voice came from behind her daughter.

 

“Hey princess what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” Clarke looked up now noticing Lexa walking down the hallway towards her and Olivia, to her surprise their daughter didn’t take off in a run to her Mama but instead turned around looking up at Lexa with sad eyes as she raised her arms into the air holding them up at her Mama. Lexa continued to walk quickly towards Clarke and Olivia, stopping in front of Olivia she leant down lifting her daughter off of the floor and onto her chest “Hey baby what’s wrong?” She asked as Olivia clung to her wrapping her arms tightly around her Mama’s neck burying her head in the crock of Lexa’s neck sniffling back more tears, Lexa didn’t push Olivia instead she just rubbed circles on her daughters back sending Clarke a comforting smile as she looked past Clarke seeing Oscar sitting up in Clarke’s bed looking over at them. When he noticed Lexa looking over he waved softly and tired at her, waving back she smiled at him before looking down at Olivia and again asking “Are you still feeling sick princess?” Olivia nodded her head softly at the question before she sniffled back more tears pushing herself against Lexa’s shoulders until she was looking at her Mama;

 

“I had a bad dream Mama” The sentence beaked both Clarke and Lexa’s interest, mainly Clarke’s due to the fact that Olivia hadn’t mentioned a bad dream to her when they spoke moments ago, though she knew Olivia was upset at the moment and that was probably why she didn’t say.

 

“How bad of a dream?”

 

“Really bad Mama….and really scary”

 

“What happened in your dream?”

 

“Don’t want to say”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Don’t like making Mommy sad”

 

“Mommy won’t be sad not if you tell her what’s wrong baby…. right Mommy?” Lexa finished looking over at Clarke who smiled softly at her and nodded her head in agreement “See…now tell Mama what happened in this dream”

 

“You, me, Mommy and Oscar were all playing in the park…but then we were home and the bad man was being mean to Mommy….and he pushed Mommy and hurt her really badly” Olivia explained lifting her head a little looking at her Mama whilst at the same time keeping a firm grip on her Mama’s shirt as she explained her nightmare to her Mama

 

“The bad man hurt Mommy in your dream?”

 

“Yeah…. Mommy was crying and you saved Mommy but the bad man gave you bad medicine”

 

“Bad Medicine?”

 

“The strawberries Mama…he gave you it all and then Mama was on the floor…then you were gone forever Mama and he was laughing and being mean to Mommy, and Mommy was crying loads and loads”

 

Lexa’s heart almost broke as she listened to her daughter explaining her nightmare, she could see the pain and upset in her daughter’s eyes and she knew herself that the worst nightmares always seemed so real and she was guessing that this was one of those nightmares from how Olivia was acting at the moment. “Is that when you woke up?” She softly asked as Olivia clung to her shirt tightly, she felt a pang of relief fill her body when Olivia nodded her head, she was thankful mainly for the fact that Olivia hadn’t had to experience anything more disturbing in her nightmare than she already had. “Well I promise you that it was just a dream, Mommy isn’t crying or hurt really bad and Mama isn’t gone forever” Olivia didn’t respond she just continued to sadly frown leaning her head down against Lexa’s shoulder again wrapping her arms around her Mama’s shoulders, turning her head and burying it in the crock of Lexa’s neck again. Lexa looked awkwardly down at Olivia reaching down she wiped away Olivia’s tears the best she could before she softly whispered “Look Mama is fine….and Mommy is fine, so that means it was definitely just a nightmare and none of it was real”

 

“Bad man here Mama” Olivia whispered against Lexa’s skin, the left over moisture from her tears wiping off onto Lexa’s skin.

 

“When was the bad man here?”

 

“Before Mama”

 

“Does Mama know the bad man?” Olivia nodded her head into Lexa’s neck, thinking for a second Lexa put all the pieces of the puzzle together realising who the bad man was “Is Roan the bad man Olivia?” Lexa soothingly rubbed Olivia’s back when her daughter held onto her even tighter shuddering slightly at the mention of Roan’s name. Looking down at Olivia, Lexa waited for an answer until Olivia softly nodded her head at the question “Well the bad man isn’t here anymore and he won’t come back”

 

“What if he does Mama?” Olivia softly whispered lifting her head up slightly to look at her Mama

 

“Then Mama will protect you from the bad man”

 

“But he will hurt you Mama…” Olivia let out a small cry as fresh tears escaped her eyes as she looked into her Mama’s eyes “I don’t want you to be gone forever Mama”

 

“I won’t be gone forever…I promise you, ok?” Olivia looked up at Lexa her face expressing that she was contemplating the information she had just been given by her Mama, seeing the expressions on Olivia’s face Lexa carried her daughter over to Clarke’s bed sitting herself and Olivia down on the bed she laid back so Olivia was laying on her chest, turning to look at Oscar as he crawled the short distance across the bed to his Mama, as he reached her she softly asked “How strong is Mama, Oscar?”

 

“Mama is superman strong”

 

“And can Superman be beaten by any human man?”

 

“No Mama”

 

“So can Mama?”

 

“NO” Oscar excitedly let out bouncing slightly on the bed as he looked at his twin sister, reaching forward he gently rubbed his sisters back, having heard everything she had said to their Mama he knew she was upset and wanted to help comfort her “Mama is Superman strong Livi, that means nobody can beat her…” Olivia looked at Oscar hesitantly before she lifted her head from her Mama’s chest and softly asked her twin;

 

“The bad man can’t beat Mama?”

 

“No, not ever…. because Mama is too strong for him”

 

As Oscar finished his sentence Lexa watched the smile spread across Olivia’s face before she turned and looked down at her smiling brightly as she leant forward resting her head on her Mama’s chest “There my princess’ smile” Olivia laughed at her Mama’s words before she softly leant forward kissing her Mama on the lips quickly, dropping her head onto her Mama’s chest Lexa smiled at the little girl’s action before looking to her son “Thank you Oz”

 

“Your welcome Mama” He smiled leaning forward and doing as his sister had done moments before, kissing his Mama quickly on the lips, shuffling back slightly he hopefully looked at her “Mama can we have a Woods sleep?”

 

“You mean a Family sleep?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama as he bit his bottom lip in slight suspense “Not tonight baby, I’ll put you and your sister back to bed and then in the morning we can all have breakfast but no Family sleep tonight” She watched the sadness creep onto Oscar’s face reaching her right hand up she ran it softly through Oscar’s messy hair “No sad faces Oz”

 

“But I want to cuddle with you and Mommy”

 

“I know but not to….”

 

“It’s ok Lexa…. they can both sleep in here with us….as long as you’re ok with it” Clarke interjected smiling at her ex, if she was honest letting Lexa sleep in what used to be their bedroom with the twins wasn’t just for the twins it was for her as well, she felt safe with Lexa around and after what had happened with Roan earlier she needed to feel safe right now.

 

“I’m more than fine with it, are you sure though?”

 

“Yeah I am”

 

“Yeah…Mommy said yes Mama” Oscar excitedly say, Olivia lifted her head up looking at her Mama with hope in her eyes. Lexa simply smiled sitting herself up and softly throwing her daughter at the pillows of the bed, as Olivia landed on the pillows safely, Lexa looked at Oscar smirking as her son looked up at her his hands clasped over his chest as if he was anticipating something reaching forward she picked Oscar up, a loud giggle escaping her son’s mouth as she did so, shaking him softly in the air she kissed him on the cheek before doing as she had done with Olivia softly throwing her son at the pillows, Oscar landed on the pillows to the right of Olivia letting out a small giggle as he landed next to his sister.

 

Without a second thought Lexa crawled across the bed onto the side she used to sleep on, noticing Clarke’s phone was on the bedside cabinet next to the bed she quickly realised that Clarke must sleep on this side of the bed, not thinking into it she pulled the covers back sliding underneath them, as she did that Clarke climbed in the other side of the bed as Oscar and Olivia carefully moved themselves under the covers between their Mommy and Mama. Oscar was next to Clarke and Olivia was lying next to Lexa, Clarke turned off the lamp before rolling onto her side, a smiled spread across her face as Oscar rolled into her resting his head against her chest as he leant into her, laughing softly Clarke laid more onto her back allowing her son to lay on her chest more.

 

Next to them Lexa was laying on her back with Olivia laying on her, her head resting on Lexa’s stomach just below her breasts. Lexa looked down at Olivia gently stroking her hand through her daughter’s hair repeatedly, Olivia continued to lay on Lexa’s stomach until a few minutes later when she sat herself up looking at her Mama her eyes filled with a little sadness, removing her hand from Olivia’s hair Lexa held her hands in the air in Olivia’s direction knowing that her daughter wanted to lay on her chest properly like she always did when she had a bad dream. Olivia quickly moved forward until Lexa’s hands were under her arms, allowing her Mama to pick her up, Lexa lifted Olivia into the air carefully laying her daughter on her chest, as she did so she shuffled herself towards the middle of the bed a little so that neither her nor Olivia fell off the bed at any point. As Olivia landed on Lexa’s chest the little girls hands instantly moved to rest on Lexa’s sides, Olivia’s head rested on Lexa’s chest facing Clarke and Oscar whilst her legs rested on either side of Lexa, the front of the little girl’s legs resting on the mattress gently, Lexa brought her arms up to wrap around her daughter’s chest holding onto her firmly but gently, slowly adjusting herself until she comfortable enough to sleep.

 

It hadn’t been long after that when Lexa, Clarke, Olivia and Oscar all feel asleep the events of the whole day taking its toll on them all. Oscar stayed curled up against Clarke the whole night, her arms naturally moving to hold her son as she slept during the night, making him feel only more comforted and relaxed. All four of them slept comfortably through until around 7am when Lexa woke up instinctively, she was so used to waking up early over the last few months that it was second nature to her even on her days off. Carefully removing Olivia from her chest leaving the little girl sleeping next to her brother and Mommy, Lexa made her way to the guest room getting herself dressed as she exited the guest room she was meet by Olivia, Lexa watched as the sleepy smile spread across Olivia’s face walking forward she scooped Olivia up off of the floor and onto her chest. She carried Olivia downstairs making herself a tea and some cereal she made Olivia a glass of orange juice before deciding to sit and watch some cartoons with her daughter who was still half asleep. As she was eating her cereal Olivia sweetly asked her for some of her cereal which then lead to her sharing her bowl of cereal with her daughter.

 

The two of them continued to watch cartoons on the TV after finishing the cereal, both of them drinking their respective drinks. As Lexa finished her tea she heard footsteps on the stairs, looking over she smiled seeing Oscar rubbed his eyes sleepily removing Olivia from her lap she walked over to Oscar leaning down she greeted her son getting a smile and a massive hug from him. She then took him into the kitchen to make him some breakfast of his own, he had gone with cereal as well before asking for his medicine, Lexa obliged giving her son the medicine he was meant to have before taking him into the living room carrying Olivia’s medicine in with her giving Olivia the medicine she returned it to the cabinet and then returned to the twins sitting on the couch smiling when Oscar sat on the opposite side of her to his sister, almost sandwiching her in between them. Once Oscar had finished she let the twins enjoy their cartoons for a while before she decided to get them ready, opting to let Clarke sleep a little longer knowing that she was up early every morning with the twins. Once Oscar and Olivia were ready they returned downstairs again sitting and watching TV this time the twins decided they wanted to watch The Jungle Book but this time they wanted to watch the live action version, Lexa obliged placing the Blu-ray on for her children.

 

At around 9:30am Clarke woke up in her bed alone, it took her a few seconds to remember what had taken placed but as soon as she did she wondered where Oscar, Olivia and Lexa were. Removing herself from the bed she walked out of her room and down the stairs smiling as she came across Lexa sandwiched between the twins as they watched a film. As she removed her foot from the final step Olivia noticed her, instantly jumping out of her seat and onto the floor running over to her Mommy excitedly, as Olivia reached her Clarke lifted her into the air and onto her chest. Olivia sweetly smiled at her Mommy greeting her with a sweet ‘Good Morning Mommy’ Clarke couldn’t help but giggle at the happiness in her daughter’s voice. Waving and greeting Lexa and Oscar good morning Clarke carried Olivia into the kitchen as her daughter filled her in on everything that she had done since she woke up. Making herself a coffee Clarke made up some toast for herself smiling as Olivia told her about how Lexa had cereal and let her share with her. Clarke carried her coffee and toast into the living room with help from Olivia as she carried her daughter. Joining Oscar and Lexa on the couch the four of them spent the next few hours watching back to back films of the twins choice, until it got to about 2pm and Clarke decided she needed to get dressed, Olivia sweetly asked if she could stay with her to which Clarke of course agreed letting her daughter lead the way to her bedroom. Twenty minutes later her and Olivia returned to the living room and Lexa and Oscar. The foursome decided to watch another film before Clarke would have to make the dinner.

 

Neither her nor Lexa thought about Lexa having to leave at a certain time they were both just enjoying spending time together with the kids without there being any drama between them. Soon enough time carried on and Clarke had prepared then cooked food for all four of them, and again soon enough the food had been served up and eaten by all of them, as time went on more both Lexa and Clarke knew that Lexa would have to leave before the twin’s bedtime otherwise they would expect her to be there when they woke up. As they washed and dried the plates and cutlery together as they had the night before they talked about what was best, they both decided that it was best for Lexa to leave about 6pm that way any upset the twins felt would tire them out and perhaps help with them getting to sleep. And sure enough 6pm came around and Lexa got the twins to sit down on the couch together explaining that she had to leave now, that sentence lead to the inevitable flood of tears from Oscar and Olivia, both of them insisting that their Mama stay with them another night. Lexa managed to calm them down slightly, enough for her to say goodbye to them and get a kiss and a hug from them both.

 

Walking out of the door knowing her kids were unhappy was probably one of the hardest if not the hardest thing that Lexa had ever had to do. As she was about to reach her apartment she texted Clarke asking how the twins were unable to stop herself worrying about them getting too upset. Clarke instantly texted her back telling her that Oscar and Olivia weren’t happy and were both not talking to her, Lexa for some reason found herself apologising to her ex, only for Clarke to reinforce that she didn’t have a reason to feel be sorry. As she walked through her apartment door she felt her phone vibrating in her pocket pulling it out she was surprised to see Clarke, still saved as My Love, was calling her answering the call Clarke explained to her that she had told the twins they could talk to her on the phone, she told them that it didn’t mean Lexa would be there in the morning when they woke up and after a few times of re-explaining it to them they finally understood what she meant, that was when she called Lexa so they could say goodnight to her. Handing the phone to Oscar first Lexa began talking to her son, sitting herself down on her couch talking away to Oscar until she heard him getting tired, once he handed the phone to Olivia she did the same thing with her daughter talking with her until this time Olivia feel asleep with Clarke’s phone attached to her ear. Once Clarke noticed she picked the phone up telling Lexa both Oscar and Olivia had fallen asleep, the two women talked for hours to each other about numerous things until they themselves started to feel tired and feel asleep reminiscing with each other.

* * *

It was now 10:50am on Monday Morning, Clarke had dropped the twins off at Pre-school at 8am made her way home quickly cleaning the living room and kitchen before leaving the house again at 10:30am, twenty minutes later and she was at Arkadia Café waiting with a coffee for Octavia to get to the café, the longer she waited the more nervous she was about what she would be told by her best friend. She was there for five minutes when Octavia walked through the door of the café, she instantly spotted Clarke walking happily over they greeted each other with a longer hug than normal, realising each other they sat back down, Octavia removed her jacket placing it on the back of the chair as a waitress approached her, ordering a coffee she smiled thankfully at the waitress her and Clarke remaining in silence until the same waitress reappeared with Octavia’s coffee placing it on the table in front of her. Placing the coffee mug in front of her Octavia looked thoughtfully at Clarke asking;

 

“So why did we need to meet up again?”

 

“Nice try Octavia, but you know exactly why I wanted to meet up”

 

“Fine….” Seeing the unimpressed look on Clarke’s face she added “What? …it was worth a try, last time we spoke about this you got really upset and it lead to you and Lexa breaking up”

 

“Well this could lead to me and Lexa getting back together”

 

“So you don’t think she cheated?”

 

“I really don’t know Octavia, that’s why I needed to talk to you”

 

“What do you mean you don’t know Clarke?”

 

“Exactly what it sounds like I mean O”

 

“What’s brought this on?”

 

“Something my mom said, on top of the fact that Lexa refuses to admit she slept with Nia, no matter what I say to her”

 

“Maybe she’s just riding it out”

 

“Riding what out O? our marriage is practically all but over, we’re both suffering and the twins aren’t doing great without her there and she knows that. If she could have it all back, then she would I know she would”

 

“Maybe she knows your doubting what you heard”

 

“No, it’s not that. I told her that if she admitted to sleeping with Nia then I’d forgive her and let her move back in, so that we could start again…but she point blank refused to admit it.”

 

“Why wouldn’t she just admit it? Raven tells me how much she misses you all, all the time”

 

“Exactly O, it doesn’t make sense why she wouldn’t just admit it and move on”

 

“Not unless she knew you were bluffing” Octavia took a sip of her coffee looking up and back to Clarke seeing the look on Clarke’s face she added “You were bluffing weren’t you?”

 

“I don’t think I was O”

 

“So even if she did cheat you’d forgive her?”

 

“Possibly…. probably…I don’t know O, right now I need to know if she actually cheated. That’s why I need you to tell me exactly what you heard Nia saying”

 

“Are you sure this is a good idea Clarke?”

 

“O, I need to hear this either way it’s gonna be upsetting…either my wife cheated on me with someone I’ve hated for a long time or my wife didn’t cheat on me and I believed my best friend over her no matter what she told me and ruined our family over a lie”

 

“I didn’t lie to you Clarke, I wouldn’t…not about something this serious”

 

“I know you didn’t O, and I haven’t asked why I can’t tell Raven I found out from you…and right now I don’t really care I just need to know what you heard”

 

“Do you want to hear I though?”

 

“What I want doesn’t come into it anymore…” When Octavia raised her eyebrows at the statement she added “This isn’t about just me anymore, this is about my kids, I need to be able to look them in the eyes and tell them that I made the right decision, and I can’t do that until I have all the facts so please can you tell me what you heard”

 

“Are one hundred percent sure?”

 

“Yes”

 

“Ok. Well like I said me and Monroe were out having lunch at Gardia’s you know Nia’s restaurant” Clarke nodded her head signalling that she knew of the restaurant “We were seating at a table near the back and after we ordered our food we waited, Nia came in and went to the back office I presume…anyway ten or something minutes later our food arrived and we started eating, I got a call from Raven so I went outside to answer the call when I got back I sat down and Nia was sitting behind me with Roan and one of their friends, I started talking to Monroe again and then I heard Nia laughing and saying Lexa’s name so I stopped Monroe talking and starting listening in…”

 

“What exactly did Nia say?”

 

“I told you before, she said that her and Lexa were hanging out after she broke up with her ex, they started reminiscing and then they were having sex on her couch...”

 

“I know that but I mean, details did she mention anything in detail?”

 

“Clarke…I’m not sure you wanna hear this”

 

“O, I know you’re being a good best friend but I need to hear this, like I said want doesn’t come into it so can you please continue…”

 

“Ok, she started off saying that Lexa was moaning about you and how you were trying to get change the den into a playroom for the twins…” Clarke closed her eyes for a second knowing that, that fact was true she had been moaning at Lexa about the den. Opening them quickly she continued to listen to her best friend “She said that lead to them having a drink or two, then they started reminiscing about when they were together in high school, she said that Lexa…...” Octavia paused not quite knowing if she should say the next sentence

 

“Octavia, its fine I need to hear it all please”

 

“She said that Lexa told her she wished that you and her never got together, that you never got married or had the twins…” Clarke’s face contorted slightly, that didn’t sound like Lexa at all, she loved the twins Clarke knew that “She said that the more they talked the closer they moved together until Lexa kissed her, they started making out and Nia stopped it, she asked if Lexa was sure she wanted to cheat on you and Lexa said yes….they kept kissing and on thing lead to another and the start removing each other’s clothes…She said she started kissing down Lexa’s neck…” That raised a red flag for Clarke, Lexa was never one to be lead during sex, she always took the lead when it came to them, but that didn’t mean anything really maybe Lexa wanted someone else to take control ignoring her doubts she listened to Octavia again “She said that she kissed her way down Lexa’s stomach over her six pack and every muscle she could get her mouth too….then she made her way to Lexa’s pants and unbuttoned them kissing her way down further until she reached Lexa’s right hip and her scar…” That was a MASSIVE red flag for Clarke, so much so that it forced her to speak;

 

“Wait what?”

 

“I said she kissed over Lexa’s scar on her right hip” Octavia’s words confirmed Clarke’s worst nightmare, it confirmed exactly what she had spent the last year alone for…...finding her words she fluttered her eyelids numerous times before clearing her throat and speaking;

 

“Lexa doesn’t have a scar on her right hip….”


	10. Scar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanna quickly say, Thank you very much to everyone that left a comment on the last chapter...all of you had very kind words to say and I wanted to let you know I massively appreciate you all taking the time to write and actually say those wrds so thank you very much :-)
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this chapter :-)

** Chapter Ten: Scar **

Clarke looked at Octavia dumbfounded, she wasn’t sure what to say at this moment she knew what Nia had said was wrong, she knew every inch of Lexa’s body like the back of her hand, every scar that was there, every mark, every dimple and every dip in her muscles and she knew Lexa didn’t have a scar on her right hip. She found herself asking so many questions inside her head, too many questions for her to handle at the moment. She was thankful when Octavia reached over touching her arm, pulling her out of her daze shaking her head softly she looked at Octavia just in time to hear the brunette ask;

 

“Are you sure Lexa doesn’t have a scar on her right hip?”

 

“Of course I’m sure Octavia, I know my wife’s body better than anyone in this world…she USED to have a scar until our honeymoon when she got it covered up with the date we got married…I was there when she got it covered up Octavia I know she doesn’t have it anymore”

 

“But she used too?”

 

“Yeah, she got it when her and Raven got into a competition about who was the better twin, the went rock climbing on a family holiday and they tried to race each other and both ended up falling, Lexa scarred her right hip and Raven scarred her left calf”

 

“I remember her telling me that story”

 

“Is that why you thought it was true?”

 

“What Clarke…are you saying that you think it was all a lie?”

 

“Of course it was O…Lexa had that tattoo done over eight years ago, the only person that would know she has it is someone she is intimate with, Nia didn’t mention it and instead said Lexa had a scar there, she doesn’t O you can’t make that kind of mistake especially when apparently kissing on that body part”

 

“But why would Nia lie Clarke?”

 

“I don’t know why that woman does anything Octavia, but now I know she was lying I can’t sit back and not find out why” Clarke stood up reaching into her back pocket she stopped in her tracks when her eyes fell on the door to the café, seeing Lexa and Raven walking into the café she looked down at Octavia just as Octavia reached up placing her hand on Clarke’s

 

“Clarke think this through…”

 

Before Octavia had a chance to continue her sentence Lexa’s voice interrupted them both “I thought it was you two…. Everything ok here?” She asked looking concerned as she looked between Clarke and Octavia, as her and Raven had walked into the café she had noticed Clarke and Octavia sitting and chatting instantly noticing the blonde looked angry about something. Clarke’s eyes landed on Lexa and instantly her anger was replaced by pure sadness and upset causing her eyes to glaze over slightly with tears “Clarke are you ok?”

 

“I am so far from ok right now I can’t even explain it”

 

“Clarke what are you talking about? ….” Turning her attention to her sister in law Lexa asked “What’s going on Octavia?”

 

“Nothing we were talking about something and she got upset…she’ll be fine”

 

Clarke’s face completely fell as she watched her best friend flat out lie to Lexa about what they were talking about, after all the lies she’d heard she couldn’t understand why Octavia would want to continue them on “Are you being serious?” She asked looking directly at Octavia who’s face look slightly fearful of what Clarke might say

 

“Clarke please…you know the deal” Octavia almost begged hoping Clarke would keep down, looking around she noticed her wife was still in the queue waiting to buy coffees for herself and Lexa. “I told you she can’t find out”

 

“Who can’t find out what? …What the hell are you two talking about?” Lexa interrupted she hadn’t intended to get involved in Clarke and Octavia’s best friend issues, all she wanted to do was make sure the twins had been ok in the morning and now she wasn’t really sure what she was involved in.

 

“Do you wanna tell her or should I?” Clarke remarked looking at Octavia who instantly looked back over to see where Raven was in the queue she was relieved when she noticed Raven was fifth in the line. Standing up she looked at Clarke softly saying “I’ll tell her but not here…” Walking past Lexa she grabbed hold of her wrist pulling her in the direction of the outside seating area knowing Clarke would follow them, as they reached outside Lexa pulled her arm free of Octavia’s grip:

 

“What the hell is going on? Why are you both being so weird?”

 

Clarke looked at Octavia waiting for the brunette to explain to Lexa what was going on, when Octavia didn’t speak but just looked at them both nervously she shook her head looking at Lexa and saying “We just found out Nia was lying about you and her”

 

“Hang on what do you mean?” Lexa asked slightly dumbfounded, she wanted to hear Clarke say she knew Nia was lying for a long time and now she was finally hearing the words it didn’t seem real

 

“I never asked for details before but today me and Octavia were talking about it and Nia mentioned a scar on your hip…” Clarke paused as Lexa naturally looked down at her hip “We both know you don’t have that scar anymore…well it’s not visible anymore...”

 

“I know I got it covered up on our honeymoon…. but what’s that got to do with Nia lying”

 

“She didn’t mention you having a tattoo, and from what Octavia told me she was detailed, like way too detailed…to the point Octavia believed it…. If you and her had slept together last year then she would know about the tattoo on her hip as well as the three stars you have on your other hip”

 

“Hang on this is insane right now….so your saying you believe me now?”

 

“I didn’t until I heard that detail…Lexa there is no way she wouldn’t find it humorous that you had the date we got married tattooed on your body and she was kissing all over it, we both know she’d make a point on mentioning that to anyone she told”

 

“Your right she would have enjoyed the irony of it….” Lexa paused for a second as her brain finally caught up with what was going on, looking to Octavia she asked “Where you the one that told Clarke?” Octavia’s face told her everything that she needed to know, shaking her head softly and closing her eyes for a second she reopened them looking at Octavia “No wonder she didn’t believe me” Pausing for a second Lexa thoughts instantly went to why Clarke never told her it was Octavia in the first place “Hang on, if it was Octavia that told you why didn’t you just tell me that, why the big secret?”

 

Clarke looked at Octavia noticing her best friend’s reluctance to tell Lexa the whole story, shaking her head she looked at Octavia “Fine I’ll tell her, I don’t know what the big issue is anyway” Turning her attention to Lexa she explained “Octavia was at Nia’s restaurant having lunch with Monroe when she overheard Nia”

 

“You’ve got to be kidding me Octavia” Lexa shockingly asked looking down at Octavia, approaching her sister in law “What the hell are you playing at? You know how Raven feels about Monroe and you hanging out”

 

“Hang on, now I’m confused what is going on?” Clarke asked looking at Lexa her face a picture of confusion

 

“Raven doesn’t like Monroe and Octavia hanging out alone”

 

“Why?”

 

“Monroe kissed Octavia”

 

“WHAT…When?”

 

“Remember that party we threw nearly two years ago to celebrate mine and Raven’s birthday?”

 

“Yeah I remember it, Octavia went home to take over from the baby sitter…...” Clarke paused for a second as she remembered the rest of the night especially the ending “Raven stayed at ours after you and her went outside to talk”

 

“Yeah well we weren’t having a great talk…. She told me she walked into the twin’s bedroom and Monroe had Octavia pinned against the wall and was kissing her….and O was kissing her back”

 

“So that’s why I couldn’t tell Lexa you overheard Nia, because you’ve having an affair?”

 

“WHAT…NO” Octavia instantly responded jumping out of her seat “I’m not having an affair, me and Monroe kissing was a mistake, I was feeling like rubbish after giving birth and she made me feel like we were back in school and I was the picture of perfection. I was about to push her away when Raven walked in on us”

 

“So that’s why I couldn’t tell anyone I heard what I did from you and Monroe?”

 

“Yes…After that night me and Raven had a long talk and she told me that she believed me and she’d try harder to make me feel as special as I was to her but she had a condition, it was that I couldn’t be alone with Monroe not until she was sure she could trust her and me together again”

 

“So I had to keep a secret to protect you instead of you just owning up to your wife?”

 

“It’s not that simple Clarke, she was madder than I’d ever seen her before. And me and Monroe have been friends for a long time, I know Raven and she would have thought that me and Monroe hanging out was a sign I wanted her to kiss me when it wasn’t, I just needed a friend that wasn’t married to my wife’s sister, my wife or my babysitter…I needed some normality and Monroe was that for me”

 

“That’s beyond ridiculous Octavia, how do you think Raven is gonna react when she hears all of this? You can’t ask Lexa to lie to her sister for you…. it’s not fair Octavia on Raven or on Lexa…”

 

“I know ok…but I’m begging you Lexa please don’t tell her…I’m going to tell her but I don’t want Zachary in the middle of everything…I swear I will tell her just not right now please….we’re finally back to normal and she’s finally trusting me” Octavia looked hopefully at Lexa waiting for her to respond, before her sister in law could say a word the door to the outside eating area opening up and Raven walked through it holding two cups of coffee in her hands and a paper bag between one of her hands and one of the cups.

 

“Hey why are you all outside?” Raven curiously asked as she walked over to the three women handing a coffee to Lexa holding her hand out in the air until her twin sister removed five dollars from her pocket and slapped it playfully into Raven’s open hand. Smirking at Lexa, Raven placed her coffee and the paper bag on the table quickly moving forward and wrapping her arms around her wife lifting her slightly off the floor for a second before placing her back on the ground, pulling back she leant forward capturing Octavia’s lips feeling Octavia smiling into the kiss, pulling back she looked down at Octavia smiling softly “How’s your day been?”

 

“It’s been good until now…now it’s great” Octavia responded leaning forward and kissing Raven again keeping their lips together for a few seconds before pulling back

 

“Are you ok baby?”

 

“Yeah, just not a good day…Zach had a bad morning”

 

“Is he ok?”

 

“Yeah he’s fine, he just missed you this morning, when he woke up he was calling for you…and of course being the little drama king Woods he is when he didn’t get his Mama he wasn’t happy and kept screaming the house down until I put on Bing then…. then he was happy”

 

“I love that little man…he’s got great priorities” Raven smirked peaking Octavia on the lips before reaching backwards onto the table picking up the paper bag she moved it in front of her and Octavia softly smiling “I got this for you…. you looked like you were having a bad day so I thought why not”

 

Octavia took the bag from Raven opening it up she looked inside seeing a chocolate covered doughnut with vanilla sprinkles on it. It was her favourite thing on the menu in the café and Raven knew that, smiling brightly she leant forward slowly kissing Raven their lips staying connected for a minute or so before Octavia slowly pulled back smiling at the slightly stunned look on Raven’s face “Thank you”

 

“Um…yeah…your um welcome” Raven stuttered out smirking at Octavia before removing her arms from around Octavia’s waist when Lexa coughed loudly, remembering they had a meeting with a client she grabbed her coffee pecking Octavia on the lips once before softly adding “We have to get back to the studio we have a meeting in 15...”

 

“13…” Lexa corrected raising an eyebrow at her twin who just raised her eyebrow at her and shook her head

 

“In 13 minutes…we need to be there before the clients…but I’ll call you later on ok?” Octavia nodded her head at her, leaning in one final time Raven pecked Octavia on the lips before turning and walking towards her twin “Come on then grumpy” She let out as she walked past Lexa taping her on the arm gently “Bye babe…bye Clarke”

 

“Bye Rae” Clarke let out as she looked nervously at Lexa, quickly moving forward so she was standing next to Lexa the movement gained Lexa’s attention making her keep her attention on the Blonde. “Can we meet up soon?”

 

“Sure…I take it; you wanna talk about what you just found out?”

 

“Yeah…I really need to talk to you about it...please?”

 

“Sure…I’ll call you as soon as my meeting is over ok?”

 

“Ok thanks” Clarke kept a smile on her face watching as Lexa smiled back before turning around and walking into the café, she watched on tip toes as Lexa and Raven walked through the café Raven making a joke at something only to get shoved by her sister nearly spilling her coffee on the floor. Soon enough they were walking out of the entrance/exit of café talking about something else. Turning her attention back to Octavia she noticed the concerned look on her best friends face “Come on, let’s go back to mine and we can talk more” Without another word to her best friend Clarke walked back inside to the table they were previously sat at grabbing her jacket and waiting for Octavia to return.

 

* * *

 

Heda Records Recording Studio-13:30

Raven and Lexa had just finished their meeting with their latest client, Reps from Warner Music Group, they were now waving them goodbye from the entrance of the building. Once the reps had pulled out of the car park, Lexa turned to her sister smirking at the look of concentration on her face, snapping her fingers in front of Raven’s face snapping her out of the thoughts they both turned and walked back inside the building stopping for a second to speak to Maya before they walked towards the studio only they used on most days. Once inside Raven moved and sat down on the couch furthest into the room whilst Lexa sat on the couch right next to it. Both of them grabbing their notepads ready to attempt to write a chorus for the new song they were producing, as requested by the record company, both of them tried to concentrate on the words but without a beat they both knew it was near impossible. After a few minutes Raven softly bit down on the end of her pen as she looked over at her twin smirking keeping the pen in her mouth as she asked her sister;

 

“So what does Clarke want to talk to you about?”

 

“She found out something that basically confirms I wasn’t lying to her about Nia”

 

“So she finally believes you?”

 

“I think so yeah”

 

“And are you going to forgive her?”

 

“I don’t know…” Lexa honestly responded dropping her head back, leaning it on the edge of the cushions of the couch behind her “I want my family back, and ever since she asked me to leave I’ve wanted nothing more than to move back in and for her to believe me but now…I don’t know if it’s that simple, if she doesn’t trust me then what else is there for us?”

 

“Lex, don’t let your pride and your brain ruin this for you…. you could be back living with your kids Lexa…waking up to have breakfast with them every morning…and you know you miss it”

 

“Of course I miss it…I love my kids but if I move back in and another lie surfaces then what? …would Clarke believe me or would she believe someone else again?”

 

“You know there’s only one person that can answer that question”

 

“I know and that’s why I wanna talk to her…I need to know what’s going on and where we go from here”

 

“Well then…the sooner we finish this song the sooner you can call her and find out what’s going on”

 

“I know, but we’re gonna need a beat because creating a chorus around a title like Shape of You is insane…” Lexa laughed out looking up at Raven seeing her sisters smirk she stood up walked over to the production panel, turning on the computer that attached to it she waited for it to come on, before she pulled up the music portal that allowed them to upload a song to the hard drive and through a password give access to the record company on the other side. Entering her password, she went into the new file marked Warner Music Group, double clicking the track they had sent over to her and Raven for them to come up with a chorus to the Ed Sheeran track they both listened to the track both of them starting to write down ideas for the chorus and additional verses as the company had told them they could.

 

They continued to write down ideas for the next hour until they both decided to stop listening to the track on a loop and instead to converse and see if one of them had come up with the perfect chorus for the song, after about a minute of looking over each other’s notes they had found the chorus, high fiving each other they smirked before walking over to the production panel just as they were about to start the track there was a small knock on the door, raising her eyebrow at Raven, Lexa got up walking over to the door she opened it up standing to the side her eyes landing on Octavia carrying her son in her arms walking into the room Octavia looked over at Raven, seeing the massive smile spread across her wife’s face, before either of them could get out a word Zachary noticed his Mama, wriggling in Octavia’s arms until she put him down, as soon as his feet hit the floor he took off running towards his Mama full force;

 

“MAMA” He let out as ran, within a second Raven had stood up and stepped forward meeting her son lifting him into the air producing a giggle from him as he landed against her chest “Miss Mama”

 

“You missed me?” Zach nodded his head at her “Oh my baby boy…. I missed you too” She cooed leaning in and kissing him gently on the cheek before he turned his head pursing his lips, leaning in she kissed him quickly before his head quickly came to rest on her shoulder, turning her attention to her wife she softly asked “How comes you’re here? Not that I’m not happy to see you or anything of course”

 

“Of course…” Octavia responded moving forward stopping in front of Raven she leant forward kissing her wife softly and lovingly before she pulled back smirking at Raven before she continued “To answer your question, once you left the café I went back to Clarke’s and about an hour later I got a phone call saying that I had to pick up Zach because one of the kids had begun throwing up and they thought it best to have all the parents pick up the kids early…and when I picked him up he was only asking about one person weren’t you handsome?” Zachary nodded his head at his Mommy holding onto Raven a little more “He wanted to see his Mama and so did I so I thought why not come and see you…. we aren’t disturbing you are we?”

 

“No, we just finished the chorus for the new song we’re need to come up with a hook and a verse to keep them sweet but our deadline isn’t for a week so I think we’ll be ok, right Lex?” Raven asked looking at her sister who smiled and nodded her head at her before adding

 

“Yeah we should be done with it by tomorrow I think, defiantly won’t take us that long, you know us the infamous Woods’ twins musically gifted” Seeing the happiness on her sisters face at being near her son, Lexa smiled at her twin before adding “Why don’t you go home Rae, spend the day with Octavia and Zachary we can finish the track tomorrow. I’ll come up with some verse’s and hooks and we can try them out tomorrow”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“Yeah I am, go spend the rest of the day with your family…”

 

“On one condition”

 

“What’s that?”

 

“Call Clarke and sort things out like we said…ok?”

 

“Sure I’ll call her in half an hour”

 

“Promise me?”

 

“I twin promise”

 

“Ok….” Looking down at Zachary she softly asked “You want Mama to come home with you right now?” Zachary excitedly nodded his head at his Mama’s question not lifting it from on his Mama’s shoulder “Ok then, it’s settled I’ll see you at the normal time tomorrow Lex yeah?”

 

“Sure thing Rae” Lexa smiled walking over and sitting back down in her chair at the production panel, she watched as her sister walked over to the door, she noticed Octavia looking at her and she knew exactly what it was about “Can I talk to you for a second O? I need some advice on Clarke” She asked seeing a small smile grace Raven’s lips

 

“Sure…I’ll meet you at the car babe” Octavia responded looking over at Raven before watching her wife remove her jacket from the peg on the wall then walked out of the studio carrying their son happily in her arms. Waiting until the door was completely shut once it was she turned back to Lexa looking at her expectantly “I know what your gonna say ok…and I know I need to tell her but I can’t right now, everything is so perfect between us”

 

“This isn’t about you anymore Octavia, my whole life got ruined and torn apart because you couldn’t be honest with Raven, if you’d been honest I wouldn’t have to wake up to an empty house without my wife or my kids…Nia ruined my life and you…you helped her”

 

“I didn’t Lexa…. I swear on my life that I thought it was the truth I thought that she was telling the truth…I didn’t realise she was lying Lexa…if I did I wouldn’t have told Clarke what I heard”

 

“But your perfectly content in lying to my sister?”

 

“I’m not content Lexa, I hate lying to her but you know I’m right, you know she’d think I was having an affair that I wanted Monroe to kiss me, no matter what I said she wouldn’t have believed me…I’d just had Zach I couldn’t risk losing everything so quickly after all that we through to get to that point” Octavia looked at Lexa her eyes pleading with her for some form of mercy

 

“Look I can’t lie to her ok it’s different we’re not just siblings we’re twins, that bond is so much more intense and different than you can imagine…she can read me better than anyone in the world even Clarke, and I can’t physically lie to her O…”

 

“Then just don’t tell her please”

 

“That the same thing as lying Octavia”

 

“No, I mean just don’t mention anything relating to me and Monroe or how Clarke found out…I will tell her I promise that I just need time…”

 

“Raven told me about the spa weekend she’s sending you on, your taking Clarke right?”

 

“Yeah in a month or so”

 

“You have until you come back to tell her…and if she asks me about anything that requires me to bring up you seeing Monroe behind her back then I’m telling her as simple as that ok?”

 

“Ok” Octavia responded smiling softly at Lexa, she wanted to hug her sister in law but she knew Lexa wasn’t very happy with her at the moment. So instead she stuck with the smile adding “Thank you, I can’t even tell you how much I appreciate it…. I better catch up with Raven and Zach before she starts giving him sweets” Octavia softly smiled again before turning and walking out of the recording room walking to find her wife.

 

Once Octavia had let the room Lexa made sure the door was closed before she went back to the computer checking it for an update she found that their new clients, Warner Music Group, had sent over further tracks for them to write lyrics to and edit as they felt they should. Placing a set of headphones on she began listening to the plain tracks, her notepad under her right arm as she held the pen in her hand, as she went through the tracks she jotted down numerous versions of verses and chorus’ as she continued to listen over the tracks and writing down lyrics she couldn’t get her mind off of Clarke and the talk that Clarke wanted them to have. Soon enough she wasn’t able to concentrate on lyrics or the track itself all she could think about was Clarke and their talk. Turning off the tracks and shutting down the computer she placed her notepad and her pen in the bag looking at the time noting it was 15:36, she carried into the studio and to meetings. Placing the bag on the couch she sat down next to it pulling her phone out of her pocket and bringing up Clarke’s number wanting to talk to her about their talk along with wanting to find out if the twins were ok, pressing on Clarke’s name her phone dialled the number placing the phone to her ear she listening to the ringing waiting for the phone to be answered and soon enough Clarke’s voice filled her ears;

 

“Hello Lex?”

 

“Hey Clarke, this isn’t a bad time is it?”

 

“Um no I’m just sitting on the couch in the living room watching Oscar play with his toys”

 

“Where’s Olivia?”

 

“She’s laying on the couch with her head on my lap…she isn’t feeling too well at the moment”

 

“Poor Baby…was she ok for nursery this morning?”

 

“She was fine when she woke up full of happiness and sunshine…but when I picked her up she looked a little pale so she’s just resting up now, her hair out and flowing just like a princess” Clarke explained as she ran her hand through Olivia’s loose hair as the little girl softly rested her hand on her thigh her chest evenly rising and falling with every breath she took.

 

“Octavia told me one of the kids at pre-school was sick”

 

“Yeah they think that the bug the twins had is going around all the kids, they said they’re closing the nursery until next Monday to be sure nobody else gets sick”

 

“They should have done that in the first place really”

 

“I know, I said that to the teacher Miss Eccles and she told me that they didn’t believe it was going to affect so many of the kids…stupid really but they should have thought about the whole picture”

 

“That’s schools for you”

 

“Yeah” Both sides of the phone call went silent as they both contemplated what to say to the other, Clarke was the first to speak “How did your meeting go?”

 

“It went really well actually, it was with Warner Music Group they basically offered us three songs, one is only a chorus and a verse but if we do well on those three and the artist is happy then we’ll be given further albums and tracks...and we’ll always be their first choice from then on they said”

 

“Lexa that’s amazing…I’m sure you and Raven will nail it”

 

“Well we’ve already worked out the chorus and the verse for the first track but now we have to come up with two complete songs, one more up-tempo and the other slow and meaningful as they described it”

 

“Still, you and Raven are a good team you’ll be able to come up with something without a problem and you know it”

 

“Maybe I do but it’s nice to hear someone has confidence in me”

 

“Why wouldn’t I? …You’re an amazing producer and writer…the best I know”

 

“You only know two”

 

“But still your number one”

 

Lexa let out a small laugh at Clarke’s comment before responding “Thanks” She paused for a second before asking the question that was hoovering in the back of her mind “So you wanted to talk”

 

“I did…I do but not over the phone I wanna do this is person Lex…” Clarke was about to continue her sentence when Olivia sat up moving onto her lap attempting to grab the phone having heard her Mama’s first name being said by her Mommy “Olivia don’t do that I’m talking...it’s rude to grab from people”

 

“I wanna talk to Mama”

 

“I know baby but I’m talking to her right now so you have to wait” Clarke firmly let out looking down at her daughter’s determined face as she moved the phone behind her head out of Olivia’s reach, when Olivia gave her a sad face and her puppy dog eyes she raised her eyebrows at her daughter “Don’t give me that look young lady, I’m having a conversation, once I’m done I’ll let you talk to Mama”

 

“But...”

 

“No but’s Olivia…Mommy said you have to wait so what does that mean?”

 

“I have to wait”

 

“Good girl…. now just sit as you are and soon you’ll be talking to Mama ok?” Olivia nodded her head softly at her Mommy, Clarke placed the phone back to her ear smiling as Olivia leant forward resting her head against her chest “Sorry about that Lex, our princess had a moment”

 

“I heard…she doesn’t sound happy”

 

“She isn’t…she gave me a very Lexa-esk sad face”

 

“Hey I don’t have a sad face”

 

“You do Lex, whenever I wouldn’t pu…. whenever I wouldn’t give you what you wanted you’d give me that look and I’d give in”

 

“I thought that was just my powers of persuasion”

 

“Nope just your good looks and sad face”

 

“Your breaking my heart here Clarke”

 

“Oh come on Lex, you’re a big girl now you can take it”

 

Both women softly laughed at their small banter before Lexa’s laugh died in her throat as she remembered that Clarke had actually broken her heart for real when she believed her best friend over her. Swallowing back a small amount of saliva she looked around the room she was sat in, her eyes settling on her feet and the trainers that covered them keeping her concentration on her trainers she seriously asked “So when are we going to have this talk Clarke?”

 

“Whenever you want Lex….as soon as possible, I need to tell you how I’m feeling and I wanna work this out between us before it’s too late”

 

“What if it’s already too late Clarke?”

 

“If it was already too late then you wouldn’t have told me you love me the other day….and I wouldn’t have told you I love you…we both want to work this out so why can’t we?”

 

“It’s not that simple Clarke and you know that”

 

“I do know that but I also know that what we have is worth fighting for…I have a lot to explain and to make up to you, but I can’t start if you don’t meet me half way…” After Clarke finished her sentence there was a prolonged silence before Lexa spoke asking;

 

“How about tomorrow?”

 

“Sorry?”

 

“This talk…. how about we meet up tomorrow?”

 

“Tomorrow sounds great” Clarke softly responded smiling softly, she looked down as Olivia looked up at her expectation and hope on her face as she looked up at her Mommy “I think Olivia really wants to talk to you now”

 

“Ok, Put her on”

 

“Ok one minute” Clarke let out bringing the phone to rest between her and Olivia before as her daughter went to hold the phone Clarke looked at her before softly adding “Remember the rules…. When Mommy says you have to say goodbye then no arguing, stay sitting down and calm, and finally No shouting ok?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy, smiling at her daughter Clarke released the phone watching as Olivia carefully moved the phone to her ear;

 

“Mama?”

 

“Hey baby girl”

 

“Hi Mama”

 

“How are you feeling? Mommy said you weren’t very happy”

 

“I felt sick Mama”

 

“Do you still feel sick?”

 

“No I laid down with Mommy and I feel better now”

 

“That’s good, did you feel sick this morning?”

 

“No…I felt sad”

 

“Why did you feel sad baby?”

 

“I miss you Mama”

 

“You do?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“I miss you too princess, but you’ll see me in a few days and we’re gonna talk later on aren’t we?”

 

“Yeah” Olivia excitedly let out bouncing on the spot slightly “Mama can we Time call?”

 

“Time call? What do you mean baby?”

 

Olivia looked at Clarke slightly confused as she softly asked “Mommy, what is the call with pictures?”

 

“What do you mean Liv?” Clarke asked looking at her daughter slightly confused

 

“When Mama calls and see her”

 

“When Mama calls and we can see her?” Clarke asked guessing that was what her daughter meant “Do you mean FaceTime?”

 

“YES”

 

“Voice young lady”

 

“Sorry Mommy…” Olivia sweetly let out looking at her Mommy before turning her attention to her phone call again “Mama…”

 

“Yes princess”

 

“Can we…FaceTime?” Olivia asked looking up at Clarke for confirmation, she let out a massive smile when her Mommy confirmed she said the right word “Can we Mama?” She sweetly asked her Mama again having not heard an answer

 

“When do you wanna FaceTime Princess?”

 

“Now Mama”

 

“You have to ask Mommy, princess. Maybe we can FaceTime later before bedtime, then you can see me before you go to sleep”

 

Olivia let out a small gasp as she looked at her Mommy, whose face was contorted in amusement “That’s the best idea ever Mama”

 

“You have to ask Mommy though”

 

“Can you?”

 

“Of course I can…why don’t you put Mommy back on the phone and I’ll talk to you later ok?”

 

“Ok Mama…I’ll give you to mommy now” Olivia sweetly smiling before holding the phone in front of Clarke who smiled and took it from her leaning forward and kissing her gently on the cheek as Olivia giggled and wrapped her arms around her neck hugging her Mommy as tightly as she could. Releasing her hug Olivia jumped off of Clarke’s lap talking over to Oscar and sitting down on the floor opposite her brother, who sweetly handed her his Supergirl figure silently inviting her to play with him. Watching the twin’s Clarke placed the phone back to her ear;

 

“Lex…you still there?”

 

“Yeah I’m here…. Olivia was just asking if we could FaceTime later, would that be ok with you?”

 

“Yeah that’d be fine, as long as we’re not interrupting you of course”

 

“Of course not, I’m usually just in the studio but I’m gonna head to the gym now and then go straight home”

 

“Ok great…What time tomorrow do you wanna meet up?”

 

“Umm, I’m not sure me and Raven should be in the studio at about 7 then we’ll work straight through until about lunchtime so maybe we could meet about 1pm at Arcadia Café…is 1pm ok for you?”

 

“Yeah that should be fine, I’ll ask my dad if he can look after Oscar and Olivia whilst we have lunch…and then maybe you can come over and see them after...”

 

“That’d be nice, though it all depends on whether we can come up with a track…but I’ll work on it tonight to make sure that I can see my munchkins”

 

“Great…anyway I’ll let you get on with recording and I will get back to the exciting task of cleaning the house”

 

“I’m sure we’ll both have a fun afternoon”

 

“Of course, cleaning is so much fun I can’t express it”

 

“Don’t pretend you don’t love it”

 

“Oh yeah I’m so in love with cleaning…. anyway We’ll chat later yeah?”

 

“Definitely…speak to you soon Clarke”

 

“That you will Lexa…. bye”

 

“Bye”

 

And with that both sides of the call went dead both of them having quickly hung up to make sure they didn’t continue to talk, because they both knew if they started then they would keep talking all afternoon and neither would get any work done. As Clarke placed her phone on the couch she looked over at Olivia and Oscar smiling at how they were happily playing action figures, Oscar was being his normal sweet self allowing Olivia to win their pretend fights, standing herself up with a massive smile on her face Clarke walked past the twins and into the kitchen telling them she was going to clean and they had to play nice, they sweetly responded with ‘Ok Mommy’ before going back to playing with their toys allowing Clarke to concentrate on cleaning the house as she needed to.

 

* * *

 

Octavia and Raven’s House

Octavia was sat in the living room on the couch waiting for Raven to return from laying their son down in his bedroom, once they had left the studio they took Zachary to an ice cream bar down the road treating him to an ice cream, it was more of a test if they were honest they weren’t sure if he was one hundred percent better from the bug he had caught but they knew if he was then eating ice cream wouldn’t be a problem for him. Once they got their Raven ordered her usual triple stacked ice cream sundae with loads of chocolate and strawberry sauce, Octavia on the other hand had gone for a normal sized sundae only covering it in a small amount of chocolate sauce and a few peanuts. Zachary had eaten his kid sized portion with absolute ease before attempting to get some off his Mama’s ice cream using his puppy eyes and a ‘pwease mama’ he was successful when Raven lifted him from the high chair sitting him on her lap allowing him to messily help himself to her sundae, both of them quickly finishing off the sundae. Once they were finished with the ice cream they got Zachary back into the car and decided to take him to the park to run around a bit and hopeful tire himself out so he’d nap.

 

Octavia had sat on the bench in the park watching as her wife played around with their son, lifting him in the air and playing rockets with him as they went from ride to ride, from the swing to the slide back to the swing, then to the jungle gym to the roundabout and on and on until they had been on every ride in the small playground. Once Zachary had finished on his final ride (The slide Again) he looked over at Octavia quickly running over to her stopping at her legs he looked up at her sweetly before saying ‘Mommy swing’ Octavia would have attempted to argue with her son but Raven was right behind him raising her eyebrows at her smiling and holding her hand out, accepting the hand she stood up walking over to the swings with Raven and a very excited Zachary, in all the times she’d taken him to this park she’d never been on the swings with him. She walked over to the swing and watched as Raven lifted their son onto her lap sitting on the swing and carefully swing herself and Zach backwards and forwards, slowly motioning with her head for Octavia to sit down on the swing next to them which Octavia complied with smiling and softly laughing at Raven’s big kid rising to the surface. Sitting on the swing she carefully swung herself backwards and forwards whilst watching Raven and their son on the swing next to her, she smirked when Raven stopped and looked at her with a mischievous grin on her face, lifting Zachary into the air she held him in the air as she walked forward until she reached her, smiling brightly at her Raven placed Zachary on Octavia’s lap allowing her time to wrap her arms around their son before she disappeared behind them both placing her hands gently on Octavia’s lower back, as soon as Raven’s hands landed on her lower back Octavia knew what she was going to do, wrapping her arms around the metal chains of the swing and back around Zachary who was excitedly wriggling and squealing on her lap, making sure she was secure on the swing and that Zach was secure on her lap she lifted her feet allowing Raven to push her on the swing.

 

Twenty Minutes later Octavia noticed Zachary was rubbing his eyes, leaning back she looked back at Raven stealing a kiss before suggesting that they should head home to allow their son to nap before it got too late. Raven agreed lifting Zachary from the Octavia’s lap onto her chest holding out one of her hands waiting for Octavia to take hold of it, they slowly walked hand in hand towards the car getting in once Zachary was securely strapped into the car seat, Raven started up the car driving them home. They had been back now for about twenty minutes, Zachary had fallen asleep about five minutes into the twenty-five-minute drive, once they got home and the car was parked up in the driveway Raven carefully lifted him out of the car seat carrying him into the house and up to his bedroom. Octavia had entered the house after Raven closing the door opting to sit on the couch and wait for her wife. She’d been sat on the couch for about ten minutes now waiting for her wife to appear in the room. Soon enough Raven came down the stairs walking across the space in the room to the couch sitting herself down next to Octavia she leant against her wife kissing her gently on the cheek, smirking at Octavia she softly said;

 

“Did I mention you look amazing today?”

 

“No you didn’t” Octavia smirked leaning into Raven connecting their lips together for a few seconds before pulling back and resting the side of her head against the back of the couch “How did the meeting go?”

 

“It went fine…all signs are leading to us being their first choice”

 

“That’s awesome babe…congrats”

 

“Thank you… and I mean that for real”

 

“For real?”

 

“I wouldn’t have been able to spend time working in the studio without you, I wouldn’t have even been a producer or own half a record company if it wasn’t for you”

 

“I haven’t done anything”

 

“You have…. you’ve always supported my decision and choices, you never told me I was being stupid or that I was being unrealistic in what I wanted, you just supported me and told me that whatever I wanted to be I could”

 

“That because you can…. your smarter than you give yourself credit for Raven, and you did the same for me, do you think that I’d be a costume designer and a stylist now if it wasn’t for you…”

 

“I think you would, your amazing you can do anything you set your mind too”

 

“And that’s what I mean you were always telling me to follow my heart, making me draw designs for you….and when we were in college you always made sure I didn’t get distracted from my work by anything…even you.”

 

“You did the same thing for me”

 

“Not really you’ve always been the smarter one out of the both of us”

 

“No I’m not babe” Seeing the doubt in Octavia’s eyes and her face, Raven softly said “Come over here” Wrapping her arms around Octavia’s waist holding her close before moving her and lifting her onto her lap so they were face to face and Octavia’s knees were bent on either side of Raven’s thighs. Looking up into her wife’s eyes she brought her hands up taking hold of Octavia’s hands with her own, interlocking their fingers she leant up kissing Octavia on the cheek softly before she spoke again “You just said I’m smarter than I give myself credit for, well the same goes for you your so much smarter than you realise you aced your exams in college and not because I made sure that you didn’t get distracted it’s because you busted your ass to make sure that you knew the answer to every question. How many people do you think passed with a 98% pass rate? …I’ll tell you None you were the only one that did and you scored the highest in all of the classes”

 

“That doesn’t mean I’m smart Raven, it just means I’m fashion smart”

 

“It doesn’t mean you’re not smart either Babe, you know things that I would never in a million years know…I mean how many people know that Pteronophobia is the fear of being tickled by feathers or that when Hippos are upset their sweat turns red or that Cherophobia is the fear of fun…you’re so amazing in so many ways…you need to give yourself more credit, I know that I don’t say it often enough but the way you look after Zachary, manage a career and keep everything in the house in perfect condition blows me away…I know I don’t tell you how much I truly love you, how much I appreciate that you let me go to the studio every day and do what I love, I know that I suck at letting you know all of this but I am so so so so so….so amazed by you every day and everything you do takes my breath away. And I know I need to step up for you more and I promise I will….”

 

“Rae…”

 

“No please let me finish…You don’t have enough faith in yourself and I’m to blame for that I know that more than anything I need to do more for you and I think that starts with you accepting work again...”

 

“We talked about this babe…I love how passionate you were just now and I know that you love and appreciate me more than you say…...but we agreed I’d stay at home and look after Zachary, you earn more than I do so it makes sense…I’m ok with staying at home”

 

“Just because I earn more doesn’t mean you mean less…. we can work something out…Like how long does it take for you come up with a design?”

 

“I don’t know babe it depends on what the client wants from me and if I’m in the right frame of mind”

 

“Ok, so roughly how long does it take?”

 

“Maybe two days on average”

 

“So how about the next time you get offered a contract or whatever you wanna call it, you accept the offer and I’ll look after Zachary…you know he loves the studio…Me and Lexa can arrange something she won’t mind” Seeing the look of contemplation on Octavia’s face Raven added “So what do you think?”

 

“It sounds good, I suppose we can give it a try... and I did get a phone call from an old client offering me a new job”

 

“Really?... When did that happen?”

 

“Yesterday evening, I told him I’d think about it and let him know”

 

“Well call him and let him know that your gonna do it”

 

“Raven we need to talk more about it, he said it’s for a big company something to do with a MPP”

 

“You know what MPP means right babe?”

 

“Ummm No”

 

“It means Music Presentation Piece it basically means a music video which means they want you to design the costumes for a Music video….and back to what you said we did talk about it and we are deciding that your accepting the job….” When Octavia raised her eyebrows at her wife she added “It’s either you call him or I call him and pretend to be you…I’ll even use my posh voice for it…” Before Raven could say another word Octavia cut her off

 

“I’m not posh”

 

“I know you’re not but I have to be posh if I’m pretending to be you”

 

“Why?”

 

“Just because”

 

“Whatever babe” Octavia paused for a second at her wife softly asking “Are you sure about this?”

 

“I’m One Million Percent sure…. but this isn’t about me babe it’s about you, do you want to go back?”

 

“Yeah I do…I think it’d be good for me to be more than just a wife and mother, not that I don’t love being both but I miss it, I draw stuff all the time but it’s not the same, you promise me you’re ok with it?”

 

“I promise; I’ve been wanting to bring it up with you for a long time but I just couldn’t find the right time until now, I know how much you love designing and just because we’re married and have a child doesn’t mean we can’t still be us. I want you to enjoy the things that make you happy because when you’re happy I’m happy…that’s all I’m worried about right now…you being happy”

 

“Thank you” Octavia smiled brightly at Raven before leaning forward capturing Raven’s lips with her own, keeping their lips connected Octavia untangled her and Raven’s hands bringing her hands to Raven’s neck gently placing her hands on Raven’s skin she slowly moved her hands downwards grazing softly over Raven’s breast as she kept their lips together, as Octavia’s hands moved down Raven’s hands moved around to Octavia’s waist gently gripping onto the material of her shirt. Smiling into the kiss Octavia continued to move her hands downwards until they reached the bottom of Raven’s shirt slowly she moved her hands underneath the material moving her hands over Ravens skin her fingers running over her wife’s toned stomach, before her hands could move higher Raven broke the kiss looking up at Octavia slightly breathless she asked;

 

“What are you doing?”

 

“Your happy when I’m happy right?” Raven nodded her head at the question “Well we’re making me happy” Octavia smirked out leaning forward recapturing her wife’s lips continuing to move her hands underneath her wife’s shirt, relishing the chance to be close to her wife in more than one way.

* * *

 


	11. Teach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa spends some quality time with her kids, whilst teaching Olivia a little something :-)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone reading this is doing and feeling well :-D. Thanks to everyone for reading this chapter, and a heads up THE TALK Chapter will be uploaded in about a minute so you can read on and enjoy that as well :-)

** Chapter Eleven-Teach **

The next day, Lexa walked into the studio with Raven having just returned from breakfast together with Zachary, Octavia had called back the gentleman that offered her the job, and he informed her that she still had the job if she wanted it but he needed the designs in the next two days. Octavia and Raven quickly discussed it before Raven called Lexa and asked if she could bring Zachary with her to work the next day, Lexa agreed it was ok as long as if Zachary got upset with being inside that Raven would take him home so as to not upset the little boy. Raven had gotten into the studio at 7am that morning and around 9:30am Zachary started to get a little niggly so Lexa suggested that they go and get some breakfast to cheer him up, just like her and Raven, Zachary was a foodie it didn’t matter what mood he was in if you put food in front of him a massive smile would spread across his face and he’d be in an instant happy mood. It was now 10:30am and they had just got back to the studio.

 

Walking into their private studio Raven placed Zachary on the floor watching him run over to the play area he had set up, all his favourite toys laying in a circle for him to play with. Sitting in the middle of the make shift circle he began playing with his toys looking at his Mama and Auntie letting out a giggle before turning back to the toy he was laughing at. Raven smirked at her son in amusement before turning her attention to her sister, who was now sat at the production panel computer switched on with her notepad a few inches away from her as her pen swirled in her right hand, as her eyes looked down at the notepad Raven had given her hours before with lyrics written down on it, Raven walked over and took a seat in the chair next to Lexa’s (Her own chair) moving closer to her sister she leant on the panel slightly before asking;

 

“So what do you think?”

“There are some really good lyrics here Rae”

 

“Really? …. you’re not just winding me up?”

 

“I’m being serious; we may need to change some of the words to match the track but it’s really good”

“Thanks Lex, Me and O had a talk last night and when she was making dinner she said something about me knowing so much it got me thinking about a few things and the words just came to me”

“The best ones always do” Lexa softly smile at her twin turning her attention back to the lyrics Raven had written on the notepad. Carefully making small notes over certain parts of the song. Leaning over to grab the mouse of the computer she carefully moved it on the screen until she came to the track Raven told her she wrote the song for. (What do I know? -Ed Sheeran) Pressing play they both listened to the track play out listening to it completely once before Lexa pressed play again, this time editing the words as she thought they needed to be as the song went on. She continued to do it, with Raven watching her every move, once she was finished she turned to her sister smirking before picking up the notepad and handing it to Raven “Not much had to be changed just a few here and there”

 

“So you really think this would work?”

 

“Yeah, the lyrics make sense they match with the backing track so yeah I can’t see why not…” Lexa was about to continue talking when she felt her phone vibrating in her pocket, reaching down and pulling her phone out of her pocket she looked at the caller ID seeing it was Clarke calling she slowly stood up looking down at her twin “Good job Rae, I’ve gotta take this…” Raven nodded her head at Lexa’s words looking over at her son before turning back to the notepad in front of her as her sister turned and walked out of the room. Once she was outside Lexa answered the call “Hey Clarke, everything ok?”

 

“Um not really…I’m gonna have rearrange our lunch today”

 

“Why? Do you not wanna talk things over anymore?”

 

“No…no it’s not that, Olivia and Oscar are sick again my dad offered to take them but they won’t let me go”

 

“What do you mean their sick again? How?”

 

“I don’t know Lex, they woke up this morning at 4am and they were throwing up, I’ve only just got them to eat something…their not dressed either Oscar won’t let me brush his hair or wash him, and when I try and get them dressed they start throwing up again”

 

“Are they running a high fever?”

 

“No higher than they had a few days ago but I’m low on Oscar’s medicine and Olivia is refusing to take hers so they aren’t feeling any better”

 

“Ok Clarke just stay calm…. your stressed and scared because you can’t help them, are you sitting with them now?”

 

“No, they fell asleep after they ate”

 

“Ok that’s a good sign we both know that…just take a deep breath in, take a seat and calm your mind”

 

Lexa heard a shuffling and a deep exhale of breath before the sound of Clarke sitting down filled the line, after a few seconds she heard Clarke speak “Thank you…. I just…”

 

“Hate seeing them like that”

 

“Yeah…so vulnerable and needing….and scared”

 

“I know Clarke, you just have to put on a brave face for them and let them know that they’ll be ok”

 

“Thank you”

 

“You’re welcome”

 

“I better hang up in case the talking wakes them up…...maybe I can call you later and we can arrange our lunch again”

 

“Sure…just call me if you need me”

 

“I will Thanks…bye Lex”

 

“Bye Clarke” Lexa softly responded, hearing the phone disconnect she looked at the screen as it locked again, placing the phone into her pocket her thoughts began to run wild, as she thought about her children being sick filled her mind. Pushing the door to the recording she walked back into the room her eyes falling instantly to her nephew who was now sat on the couch looking at the door, as his eyes fell on her a massive smile spread across his face as he held his arms up in the air towards her, walking over to him she quickly lifted him up onto her chest smiling when he hugged her tightly. She smiled as he reached up placing his hands on her face and gently moving them around, an amused giggle filling the room as Zachary laughed at his own actions, as he stopped his hands on Lexa’s cheek she looked at him raising her eyebrows at him she gently blew in his face making him laugh loudly. She continued to play with him for a few minutes before he saw his Mama again and held his hands out in her direction, making Raven stand up and walk over to Lexa and Zachary reaching forward and lifting him from Lexa’s chest onto her own.

 

“Mama” Zachary sweetly let out as he placed his hands on Raven’s cheeks smiling then looking to Lexa and pointing at her giggling slightly “Not Mama…. Lexa” Raven and Lexa laughed at the little boy realising that he must have gotten slightly confused at the fact that they looked a lot alike, Raven placed an amused kiss on her son’s cheek as he wrapped his arms around her neck

 

“That’s my smart boy…...” Placing her hand on Zachary’s chest gently gripping his shirt moving it under her hand she softly said “Just remember, Mama is the pretty one and Aunt Lexa is the smart one…” Raven finished looking at her twin smirking at the raised eyebrow her sister sent her before she notice Lexa looked like her mind was somewhere else. “What’s wrong Lex?”

 

“Nothing just Clarke cancelled our lunch today”

 

“Why?”

 

“The twins are sick again”

 

“Is this the same thing as before?”

 

“I don’t know Rae; I think it is…. But I do know that if the school had done the right thing and cancelled pre-school for the week this wouldn’t be happening”

 

“Are they worse or better than before?”

 

“From what Clarke said worse…. Oscar’s out of medicine and Olivia is refusing to take hers…I think it might be something to do with her allergic reaction…” Lexa stopped talking for a moment her attention brought to her nephew as he rested his head on her shoulder and began to play with her ponytail as he slowly breathed in and out. Smiling at the image she instantly and internally made up her mind “Will you be ok on your own?”

 

“Yeah of course I will why?”

 

“I’m gonna go check on the twin’s, pick up some medicine for Oscar and some of that mango juice Olivia likes”

 

“Ok sis, no problem”

 

“Thanks Rae” Lexa softly responded smiling at her sister before reaching for her jacket and putting it on, turning around she waved at Raven and Zachary softly saying “Bye bye Zach” Turning she walked out of the door smiling when she heard her nephew respond;

 

“Bye smart Lexa”

 

* * *

 

Clarke and Lexa’s House-11:15

Clarke was sat on the couch Oscar was lying next to her quietly watching the movie she had put on TV in hopes of calming the twins. Olivia was sat on Clarke’s lap arguing with her about taking the spoonful of medicine that was on the spoon Clarke held in her hand, they had been arguing for the last ten minutes straight and now Olivia was starting to wriggle and push against Clarke in a violent manner, Clarke could feel herself going slowly insane she never liked disciplining the twin’s but sometimes they had to and right now she was really close to losing her temper with Olivia, she understood her daughter not wanting to take the medicine but the pushing and the violent behaviour wasn’t something she wanted them to think would be tolerated. She was about to verbalise her thoughts when the doorbell went, she tried to put Olivia down but the little girl wasn’t having it and clung onto her Mommy like a Koala bear does to a tree. Holding Olivia against her chest Clarke stood up and walked to the door unlocking it and opening it revealing Lexa standing with a brown paper bag held against her chest.

 

“Hi Mama” Olivia sweetly let out waving at her Mama, instantly getting a wave back from Lexa who also sent her a massive smile, Clarke looked down at their daughter gently moving some hair from her face and placing it behind her ear. Placing a gentle kiss on Olivia’s forehead she looked up at Lexa softly asking;

 

“Lex…what are you doing here?”

 

“Hey Princess…...Um Hey Clarke look I know I should have called first…But…you sounded really stressed out so I thought maybe you could use some back-up…. I also got supplies” She added pointing to the paper bag “I got Oscar some medicine as you said he was out, I got Olivia some juice to help her feel better and…. I also got two chicken Subs…one with extra chilli sauce, jalapenos, red onions, lettuce and all that crazy stuff you put on your Subs….” Not hearing a response from Clarke and seeing the blank look on her ex’s face she continued “I can leave if you want….”

 

“No…. I just didn’t expect you to do this that’s all…”

 

“Expect the unexpected Clarke”

 

“If you say so…...um…anyway come in Lex…” Clarke softly said walking away from the door allowing Lexa to walk into the house. “Oscar, Mama is here….and she has some medicine for you” Clarke softly spoke as she walked back to the couch sitting down on the couch where she had been sat moments before. She watched as Oscar sat up on the couch looking over at his Mama a smile breaking out on his face, his arms instantly shooting into the air;

 

“Hi Mama”

 

“Hi Oz” Lexa responded quickly closing the door, placing the paper bag on the floor and moving across the room until she was leaning down in front of her son, lifting him off of the couch and onto her chest “Mommy said your sick again…” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama a sad frown gracing his face as he looked at her “Well I got you some medicine to make you feel better”

 

“Thank you Mama”

 

“Your so welcome my handsome prince…How about we go in the kitchen and take your medicine and then we can fix up this messy hair of yours” She let out running her hands through her son’s hair earning a small giggle from him before he rested his head against her shoulder

 

“Ok Mama”

 

“Good boy…Olivia, would you like some medicine?” Olivia instantly shook her head attempting to push her Mommy away again, Lexa quickly moved forward sitting on the arm of the couch next to where Clarke was sitting “Hey young lady, you don’t do that to Mommy ok?” Olivia nodded her head “If you don’t want the medicine then you tell Mommy…and you tell her why you don’t want it. We don’t push or hit or be violent to each other do we?” Olivia shook her head again at her Mama looking to her Mommy sniffling back tears she leant forward resting her head on Clarke’s shoulder while her right hand reached up grabbing hold of Clarke’s loose hair “Tell Mommy what’s wrong…me and Oscar are going to get his medicine then I’ll bring you some juice ok?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mama’s words, and without another word Lexa stood up walking over to the paper bag she held Oscar with one hand and lifted the back off of the ground with the other before walking off and into the kitchen leaving Olivia to tell her Mommy what was wrong;

 

“I’m scared Mommy”

 

“Why are you scared Princess?” Clarke softly asked turning her head slightly so she could see Olivia’s face more, placing a gentle kiss on Olivia’s forehead she waited for her daughter to answer

 

“Don’t want a reaction Mommy”

 

“You don’t want another allergic reaction?”

 

“It’s scary Mommy…I don’t like it”

 

“I know you don’t princess, but remember what Mommy said I will protect you and make sure that you don’t have another reaction again”

 

“Not forever Mommy”

 

“If you want me to protect you forever princess then I will......” Clarke looked down at Olivia awaiting a response, after a minute or so she still hadn’t received one so she decided to ease her daughters fears she’d tell her a story “Do you know when me and Mama were younger, Mama was a silly billy…”

 

“Why Mommy?”

 

“Well Mama took me on a date but she didn’t tell me that she didn’t like strawberries because they made her sick…so me and Mama were eating our dessert and I offered Mama a strawberry…” Clarke couldn’t supress the smile from forming on her face when her daughter gasped loudly at her words “Well Mama didn’t take it, instead she got really angry at me because I wouldn’t take no for an answer…and then Mama got up and walked out leaving Mommy all alone…”

 

“Bad Mama”

 

“I know baby….so I ran after Mama and I asked her why was she so angry, she didn’t want to tell me BUT she wanted to walk me home, so I told her that unless she told me what was wrong then I wouldn’t let her…so eventually Mama trusted me and told me why she didn’t want the Strawberry…”

 

“Cause their bad Mommy”

 

“Exactly princess….and I told Mama that she shouldn’t have got angry with me, because I didn’t know I told her that she should have told me what was wrong, then I wouldn’t have made Mama feel embarrassed or sad or angry at all…instead I could have helped her and made sure she didn’t go anywhere near the bad Strawberries…” Clarke paused for a second looking down at her daughter trying to see if she had grasped what she was saying “So do you trust Mommy?”

 

“Yes”

 

“And you know Mommy would kil….do anything for you, anything in the whole wide world just to make you happy…so if you’re scared or worried you have to tell me no matter what it is, promise?”

 

“I promise Mommy…I’m sorry I hit’ed you”

 

“It’s ok baby I know you didn’t mean it…and I promise you that no matter what I will make sure that we don’t have ANYTHING strawberry related in this house ok?”

 

“Ok…. Thank you Mommy” Olivia sweetly smiled up at Clarke leaning up she kissed her Mommy on the cheek softly before returning her head to Clarke’s shoulder her hands curled up between her chest and Clarke’s chest. Clarke listened as Olivia’s breathing remained level and steady, her daughter’s chest rising and falling against her own calming her in a way even more. She continued to listen to her daughter’s chest rising, she wasn’t sure how much had passed when Lexa came back into the living room carrying Oscar in one arm whilst she carried a glass of Mango juice in her hand, once she reached Clarke she smiled softly at her before placing the glass on the table in front of the couch.

 

“Oscar has had his medicine like a big boy so we’re going upstairs to sort out his hair”

 

“Ok, Thanks Lexa”

 

“No problem….do you want your sub now or not?”

 

“I’ll wait for you…I think Oscar’s hair is more important at the moment”

 

“Your right he looks a scruffy mess...” Lexa softly laughed ruffling her son’s hair with her now free hand making him softly giggle against her shoulder gripping his hands onto her jacket which she was yet to remove. “If you need anything call out for me and I’ll come down”

 

“Ok…oh Oscar’s comb is in my bathroom, I left it in there earlier after our failed attempt to fix his hair”

 

“It hurt Mommy…I’m sorry…” Oscar responded looking at his Mommy from his spot on his Mama’s shoulder

 

“It’s ok Oz, I know you it was hurting you…so I forgive you”

 

“Thank you Mommy”

 

“Come on then Handsome let’s get you looking even more handsome shall we?” Lexa softly said looking down at her son kissing him gently on the forehead after he softly nodded his head at her sentence “Ok then let’s do it” Lexa smiled at Clarke one more time before turning and walking towards and then up the stairs with Oscar in her arms. Once they were on the landing she carried Oscar into the bedroom she once shared with Clarke walking quickly through the room until she was in the bathroom suite that again she used to share with Clarke, seeing the comb on the side she reached forward picking up the comb before going to turn around and walk out of the bathroom only to be stopped by Oscar’s voice;

 

“Stay in here Mama”

 

“You want to do your hair in here?”

 

“Yes”

 

“But why in here?”

 

“Mirror is bigger Mama”

 

“You like the bigger mirror huh Oz?” Oscar softly nodded his head at his Mama before she looked down at him asking “Where would you like to sit?”

 

“There Mama”

 

Lexa smirked looking at the blank space on the counter the space used to hold all her body/beauty products long with her hair brush and toothbrush when she lived in the house, but now it was just an empty space on the right side next of the sink, Lexa noticed that all of Clarke’s products were on the left hand side all placed neatly in order of size with her hairbrush laying in front of all the products. Shaking herself out of her thoughts she carefully placed Oscar on the spot he had pointed at, his legs crossing as he sat down on the counter his back straight waiting for his Mama to do his hair, smiling at her sons actions Lexa carefully removed her jacket throwing it through the door and into the bedroom, something she had done numerous times over the years when her and Clarke had gotten a little carried away with a make out session, as her jacket landed safely on the bed she turned back to Oscar: “Where is your conditioner Spray baby boy?”

 

“Mommy keeps it underneath Mama...”

 

“Is that so you don’t grab it and use it huh?” Oscar let out a dirty giggle before a cough erupted in his chest, despite the cough Oscar continued to laugh his small hand covering his mouth as he nodded his head at his Mama. Lexa smiled at him keeping her hand behind Oscar’s back in case he decided to lean backwards she leant down opening the cabinet door she was slightly taken back to see all of her products on a shelf in the cabinet, smiling at the sight she looked for Oscar’s spray not seeing the one she had at her apartment for her son she leant down a little more seeing a spray bottle in with what used to be her products she leant forward picking it up and removing it from the cabinet holding it up feeling it wasn’t full as she knew it would have been when she moved out, she held the bottle up so Oscar could see the item in the mirror “Is this your spray?” Oscar nodded his head making Lexa laugh softly, the laugh quickly died in her throat when she noticed Oscar’s face was slightly paler and he looked as if he was about to be sick “Do you wanna vomit Oscar?” The little boy nodded his head at his Mama, causing her to instantly jump into action placing the bottle on the counter she quickly lifted her son off of the counter carrying him over to the toilet seat lifting up the cover she placed Oscar on the floor holding onto his chest with her right hand so he didn’t fall she watched as her son threw up into toilet seat, feeling his body wrench and heave against her hand as he did so. Minutes passed by as Oscar continued to throw up into the toilet, after what felt like an eternity to Lexa, Oscar stopped throwing up and his body came to rest gently against his Mama’s hand “All done?” Lexa calmly asked her son who softly nodded his head at her, using her hand she guided Oscar until he was laying against her chest, looking down at him she now noticed tears were running down Oscar’s cheeks, bringing her hand up she wiped away the tears the action causing her son to look up at her with a sad face;

 

“Don’t like it Mama….it hurts”

 

“I know it does baby, but sometimes when we get sick our body repairs itself by removing the bad stuff inside our stomach” Seeing the confused look on her son’s face she continued “You see when we’re sick our bodies don’t want food because it uses energy so you get really thirsty and wanna drink loads, but then what happens is you have too much fluid in your stomach which makes your stomach react and make you sick…does that make any sense?” Oscar nodded his head slightly at his Mama “You wanna sit here for a bit or do you wanna fix your hair?”

 

“Wanna fix my hair Mama”

 

“Ok then” She softly said removing her son from her hold lifting him onto his feet, standing herself up she smiled when Oscar held his arms in the air, lifting him onto the counter so he was sitting where he was before she watched him cross his legs again sitting himself up straight, smiling she leant down into the cabinet again retrieving some mouthwash she poured a tiny amount of it into the cap holding it in front of her son “Remember what we do with Mouthwash?” Oscar nodded his head “Good so gargle this for ten seconds and it’ll take the nasty vomit taste away” Oscar smiled at her taking the cap from his Mama and pouring the liquid into his mouth beginning to gargle as he had been taught, after about 5 seconds Lexa smiled down at her son softly speaking “Keep going Oz….5…..keep going cheeky….4……3……2……1 and a half…..1……..aaaannnnnd spit it out” Lexa laughed as Oscar gently spat the liquid into the sink next to him laughing as he watched his Mama turn on the tap and wash the used liquid away, as she turned the lap off Lexa looked to Oscar who was still laughing away “What is so funny Mister?”

 

“Mama is funny”

 

“Is she?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“And what is so funny about Mama huh?”

 

“You were speaking funny Mama”

 

“I was, wasn’t I?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“Ok then, no more funny talking shall we sort out this hair of yours huh?” Oscar excitedly nodded his head at his Mama looking up and back at her

 

“I like when you do my hair Mama”

 

“And I like doing your hair…. what would you like today?”

 

“Normal please Mama”

 

“Ok then the normal handsome comb over it is” Lexa smiled placing a gentle kiss on Oscar’s forehead before reaching over to her left and picking up the spray bottle, seeing what is Mama was doing Oscar lowered his head so he was again looking in the mirror a massive smile covering his face, picking up the comb she placed it in her right back pocket, holding the spray bottle in her hand Lexa moved so she was directly behind Oscar smiling into the mirror at her son she began to spray his hair wetting it, the smile on her face growing as she heard the excited giggles of Oscar as he clapped his hands and wriggled his crossed legs in excitement. Once Oscar’s hair was wet enough she removed the comb from her back pocket beginning to sections as she always did, starting on the top of Oscar’s head she sectioned the top part of his hair, she then sectioned the side and the back once that was done she began combing the sides and the back of Oscar’s hair until the hair seamlessly flowed down and blended together, moving onto the top of Oscar’s hair again she combed the top section forward, once she had completely combed the top section forward she looked at her son seeing him smiling back at her in the mirror she began to comb Oscar’s hair to the side piece by piece, five minutes later and she had just finished and Oscar’s hair was side comber to perfection, lowering herself so she was just above Oscar’s shoulder she looked at her son smiling “How is that?”

 

Oscar excitedly clapped his hands uncrossing his legs he turned around onto his knees looking up at his Mama he happily let out “It’s perfect Mama” Oscar leant forward wrapping his arms around his Mama’s waist he quickly released the hug his face slightly nervous “Did I mess it up Mama?”

 

“No Oz you didn’t mess it up…it still looks perfect” Lexa responded smiling at Oscar as he turned and looked in the mirror smiling and softly giggling as he looked at his hair, as Lexa looked at the mirror she noticed Olivia’s reflection turning around she looked at the bathroom door seeing her daughter standing in the doorway her hands clasped together gripping onto her t-shirt as she looked at her Mama smiling “Hey Princess, are you ok? Where’s Mommy?”

 

“Mommy is sleeping”

 

“Are you feeling better?” Olivia nodded her head slightly staring at her Mama “Do you like Oscars hair?” Olivia nodded her head at the question before holding her hand in the air for Olivia, seeing the hand Olivia quickly walked the space between her and her Mama, coming to stand next to Lexa her head resting on Lexa’s outer thigh while her hand gripped gently onto her Mama’s. Lexa watched as Oscar happily continued to look at his hair in the mirror, feeling Olivia tugging at her hand she looked down at her daughter “What’s wrong princess?”

 

“Can you fix my hair Mama?”

 

Lexa smiled at Olivia now taking in the back of the braided ponytail she had, it wasn’t neat and looked quite loose compared to how she knew Olivia liked it “Did Mommy leave it too loose?”

 

“Yeah, can you fix it please Mama?”

 

“Of course I can princess…. why don’t you go grab your hairbrush” Lexa smiled as Olivia walked off in the direction of her and Oscar’s bedroom, turning her attention to her son “Come on Oscar jump down” Oscar turned around and looked at his Mama smiling before he walked out of the bathroom, Lexa was about to ask where he was going when he jumped up onto Clarke’s bed sitting sweetly on the bed looking at his Mama knowing she was about to do his sisters hair and would need the counter top

 

“Got it Mama” Olivia let out holding the brush up for her Mama, Lexa took the brush from her daughter placing it on the counter next to Oscar’s comb holding her hands up for Olivia who walked forward letting her Mama lift her off of the floor and onto the counter, just as her brother had done she crossed her legs and sat up straight “Mama….”

 

“Yes princess”

 

“I’m sorry I hit Mommy”

 

“Did you tell Mommy you were sorry?”

 

“Yes”

 

“And did you tell Mommy why you hit her?”

 

“I did Mama… And Mommy said she will make sure no strawberries hurt me”

 

“And she will…. just like she did for Mama when we were younger” Lexa smiled into the mirror before taking Olivia’s braid in her hand and beginning to undo it, continuing until her daughter’s hair was completely loose “We’re gonna have to get your hair cut soon princess”

 

“No Mama…I like it longer”

 

“Really and whys that?”

 

“Princesses have long hair”

 

“They do…but even princesses get their hair cut at some point”

 

“Even Rapunzel Mama?”

 

“Yep even Rapunzel”

 

“Ok then Mama…but can you come with me?”

 

“Of course I can princess” Lexa softly smiled reaching over she grabbed Olivia’s hairbrush beginning to brush her daughter’s hair, after a few minutes she placed the brush down reaching over and picking up the spray bottle she carefully began spraying her daughters hair until it was just wet enough, placing the bottle down she picked the brush back up and began to carefully brush Olivia’s hair backwards continuing with what she was doing she continued talking to Olivia “So why didn’t you tell Mommy your hair was too loose?” Lexa watched as Olivia brought her hand up to her mouth nervously

 

“Mommy was upset”

 

“She was…. how do you know that?”

 

“I heard Mommy crying”

 

“When was this?”

 

“I woke up because I felt sick, and I wanted Mommy cuddles but she was crying”

 

“Did you go back to sleep?”

 

“Yes”

 

“So you didn’t want to upset Mommy in the morning?”

 

“We were sick Mama and Mommy was upset again, I was being a good girl”

 

“And you were a very good girl…come on then let’s fix this hair” Lexa softly smiled at her daughter turning her attention back to Olivia’s hair, carefully separating Olivia’s hair into two separate sections placing a hairband on one section she began brushing through it before switching and doing the same with the other section before she began to braid the sections together to make the ponytail braid her daughter loved wearing. Once she was finished brushing through both sections she braided them together tight enough so that they wouldn’t fall out during the day. Once she was finished she wrapped a hairband around the end making sure the hairband itself was tight. “All done princess”

 

“Thank you Mama” Olivia sweetly smiled turning around and hugging her Mama, she was about to show off her hair to her brother when she noticed that he wasn’t sitting on the bed anymore “Where’s Oscar Mama?” Lexa looked towards the bed seeing no sign of her son;

 

“I don’t know baby, let’s go find out” She smiled holding her arms out for her daughter Olivia accepted leaning forward a little for her Mama to lift her, which she did, Lexa lifted Olivia onto her chest walking out of the bathroom and walking out of the bedroom then down the stairs into the living room, she smiled brightly when her eyes landed on her son curled up on his Mommy’s lap his head resting gently on her shoulder with her arms wrapped protectively around him. Looking at her daughter she softly asked “You wanna help Mama write some music?” Olivia nodded her head at the question leading Lexa to walk in the direction of the den she once used all the time to write music. Once there she tested the lock, to her surprise it was unlocked, sliding the door to the side she smiled when she noticed everything was where she left it months ago and apart from the picture Olivia had put in the twins’ bedroom nothing had been disturbed or moved at all. Closing the door slightly she walked towards the desk sitting herself down on the chair adjusting Olivia so she was sat comfortably on her lap. Reaching into the top draw on her right hand side she pulled out a notepad which she was again slightly shocked were still there. Reaching for a pen she placed it on top of the notepad looking down at her daughter “Have your teachers taught you how to write your name yet?”

 

“No Mama……can you teach me?”

 

“Of course I can” Lexa smiled down at her daughter, teaching her daughter something she would use forever was way more important than forcing herself to write a song. Leaning forward slightly Lexa placed her left hand on the desk, internally smiling when Olivia leant forward leaning both her arms on the desk her attention now fully on the notepad, holding the pen in her right hand Lexa carefully wrote out Olivia’s full name as few times before placing the pen down, and softly asked “Can you read that?”

 

“Yes Mama….it says Olivia Abigail Woods….” Olivia let out a small gasp looking up at her Mama “That’s me Mama”

 

“It is indeed”

 

“What is Abigail Mama?”

 

“You don’t remember me telling you before?” Olivia softly shook her head at her Mama “Let me remind you…. Abigail is Grandma’s name, see you have Grandma’s first name and Oscar has Grandpa’s first name…”

 

“What about Nana’s name Mama?”

 

“Well you and Oscar have my surname which was my daddy’s Mama’s name…so my Nana’s name so you do have Nana’s name”

 

“What’s a surname Mama?”

 

“It’s your last name, when your part of a family you all have the same name…you usually get it from your daddy...”

 

“But I don’t have a daddy Mama”

 

“I know, that’s why me and Mommy thought about it loads and loads and loads, until we both decided that you would have my last name because Mommy carried you in her tummy. We then decided to give you a name that had part of both of us in it….so we gave you Grandma’s name and Oscar Grandpa’s name and we gave you both Mama’s surname…which my Mama and Papa gave me….is that ok?”

 

“YEAH” Olivia excitedly let out jumping up on Lexa’s lap “It’s great Mama”

 

“That’s what I thought as well” Lexa softly smiled placing a gentle kiss on the top of her daughter’s head “Ok so all you have to do is go over what Mama has written, then once you’ve done all of those we can try it without Mama’s writing, sound good princess?”

 

“Yes Mama”

 

“Ok then let’s start” Lexa smiled shuffling a little closer to the desk so Olivia could reach forward a little more, picking up the pen she handed it to Olivia before moving the notepad so it was closer to Olivia. She smiled as she watched her daughter adjust the pen in her hand until she was happy with its position, then leaning forward she placed her left arm right next to the notepad steadying herself on the desk pushing a little on her left arm so she could write properly. Lexa watched as Olivia struggled to go over her writing so reaching forward she placed her hand over her daughter’s “Let Mama help you…”

 

“No Mama…I can do it” Olivia confidently said not shaking her Mama’s hand away but instead waiting for her Mama to remove it. When Lexa removed her hand from Olivia’s she broke into a massive smile as Olivia began to write over her name with the pen in her hand. Lexa watched on for about thirty minutes until Olivia completed the twentieth and final written version of her name. As she finished she turned around looking up at her Mama “Is that right Mama?” Her face was the picture of pure hopefulness, she watched as her Mama looked over what she had done

 

Lexa had to admit she was impressed she hadn’t expected her daughter to get the writing perfect like she had, of the twenty times Olivia had written over her name she had only gone out of the lines on five of them, and Lexa knew for a four nearly five-year-old that was pretty impressive. Smiling down at Olivia she hugged her daughter tightly making the four-year-old burst into a fit of giggles “It’s perfect princess….you think you can write it without Mama’s writing there” Olivia nodded her head eagerly her attention turning back to the notepad, finding a space below where her Mama had written her name she placed her pen on the notepad her face the picture of concentration as she looked from the already written version of her name to the blank space she was writing her name on now.

 

Lexa continued to watch Olivia write only able to see her daughters hand moving and not see what she was actually writing due to Olivia concentrating so hard that almost her chest was almost pressed against the desk. After about ten minutes Olivia finally sat up sitting straight and resting against her Mama’s chest again, as she dropped the pen she shook her hand looking up at her Mama “My hand hurts Mama”

 

“I know princess but you get used to it” Lexa soothingly responded reaching down picking up Olivia’s hand and placing numerous kisses all over her daughter’s hand, thankfully the kisses succeeded as Olivia chuckled softly at her Mama’s actions “Let’s see how you did” Lexa let out wrapping her arms around her daughter’s chest holding her close, gently and softly shaking her daughter from side to side before stilling them both so she could look at the writing her daughter had just completed. Looking over the writing she was even more impressed, Olivia had written her name on her own five times, the writing wasn’t too big and it began to go down the page as Lexa read on. Smiling as she looked at the final written version of the name she looked down at her daughter extremely proud of how her daughter had picked up writing her name so quickly, she knew it wasn’t perfect by any means, and yes Olivia ha some work to do on writing some of the letters but for a first attempt it was massively impressive, she knew herself that she wasn’t writing her name until she was five nearly six-years-old. Looking back down at her daughter she proudly said “It’s perfect princess”

 

“Is it right Mama?”

 

“Yes…. you got every single one right”

 

“YEAH…I GOT IT RIGHT….” Olivia excitedly let out jumping up and down on the spot she stopped when she heard a voice fill the room

 

“What did you get right Princess?” Clarke amusingly asked looking over at her daughter and Lexa sat at the desk in the den. She could see the excitement flowing out of her daughter so she knew whatever it was she was extremely proud and happy about it, she smiled watching as Olivia turned around and looked up at her Mama;

 

“Can I show Mommy?”

 

“Of course you can” Lexa quickly responded “I think she’s gonna be really proud of you” Lexa smiled out before pushing the chair back creating space between her, Olivia and the desk stopping the chair she lifted Olivia onto the floor reaching forward and grabbing the notepad handing it to Olivia, watching as Olivia ran around the desk excitedly across the room until she reached her Mommy.

 

“Look what I did Mommy” She excitedly let out almost jumping off of the floor trying to hand the notepad to Clarke. Seeing the excitement Clarke knelt down amused at her daughter’s actions, once she was level she held out her hand for the notepad, within a second Olivia had handed the notepad to her but upside down, laughing softly and turning the notepad around she raised an eyebrow at Olivia watching as her daughter watched her every move. Turning the notepad completely she took in the writing on the page, knowing it was Lexa’s from the neatness of it, she instantly noticed that there was writing over Lexa’s writing, noticing it was Olivia’s full name written on the paper she scanned the page her eyes going lower and lower until she reached the part of the page where Olivia had written her name, scanning over the writing her face fell slightly as she realised the handwriting didn’t belong to Lexa, her eyes scanned over the writing noting how the name went down the page slightly with every letter written she noticed how the letters weren’t written as small as Lexa would write, not wanting to jump to the conclusion she looked up at her daughter;

 

“Who wrote these one’s baby?”

 

“I did Mommy” Olivia excitedly let out moving forward resting her hands on her Mommy’s knees, Clarke felt completely dumbfounded she didn’t know what to say, her baby girl had written her name, the pride inside her rose up instantly as she looked at her daughter. “Do you like it Mommy?” Clarke heard the words come from her daughter’s mouth but for a few seconds she couldn’t form a sentence, shaking her head slightly a massive smile broke out on her face

 

“Are you kidding…. I love it” She happily let out quickly placing the notepad on the floor she wrapped her arms around her daughter standing up and lifting her up off of the ground twirling her around. Stopping after a second so she didn’t make Olivia throw up as she knew she was already sick. Placing kisses on her daughter’s cheeks she leant down picking up the notepad holding it in one hand and looking at it she happily spoke looking down at her daughter “You’re such a smart little girl…when did you learn this?”

 

“Mama taught me Mommy….and Look I written my surname”

 

“You wrote your surname baby”

 

“Wrote?”

 

“Yes”

 

“What does it mean Mommy?”

 

“It means that you have written something down”

 

“Ok……. I wrote my surname Mommy”

 

“Your surname?”

 

“Yeah…. It’s our family name”

 

“It is…. but what is our family?”

 

Olivia paused for a second looking to her Mama who gave her a nod of encouragement “Woods” She let out with a small jerk of movement and a massive smile

 

“Well done…. ok then…. what is your full name? …. all your names together?”

 

Olivia paused for a second looking over at her Mama as her right hand came up to cover her mouth thoughtfully, when her Mama gave her another nod and smile of encouragement she smiled removing her hand from over her mouth looking at her Mommy she proudly and confidently spoke “Olivia Abigail Woods”

 

“That’s perfect Princess” Clarke proudly beamed at her daughter hugging her tightly again placing a gentle kiss on her daughter’s shoulder. Pulling back, she noticed the proud smile on Olivia’s face leaning forward intended to kiss her daughter on the cheek, she laughed softly when Olivia placed her hands on her cheek leaning up and kissing her Mommy on the lips, as Olivia looked up at her giggling as she kept her hands on her Mommy’s cheeks. Laughing at the action Clarke smiled softly leaning forward placing continuous kisses on her daughter’s lips, continuing the action for about ten seconds before she pulled back smiling at her daughter “You are so smart…and I’m really proud of you”

 

“Really Mommy?”

 

“Of course really…. you know I couldn’t write my name until I was 5…which means you may be smarter than Mommy”

 

“No I’m not Mommy…. you’re really smart”

 

“Am I?”

 

“Yes…. you’re the smartest Mommy ever”

 

“Thank you princess”

 

“Your welcome….” Olivia sweetly responded smiling brightly at her Mommy, leaning forward resting her head on her Mommy’s shoulder looking over at her Mama smiling softly. Feeling the sleepiness and sickness inside her rising she looked up at her Mommy and softly asked “Can I have a nap Mommy?”

 

“Are you tired?”

 

“A little Mommy….my hand hurts a little”

 

“Ok then, how about you go take a nap for a few hours and I will wake you up when I make something to eat and some medicine, ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy….” Olivia paused as she looked over at her Mama then quickly back to her Mommy moving until her mouth was at her Mommy’s right ear softly whispering “Don’t let Mama leave Mommy…. please”

 

“I won’t Princess I promise you….so why don’t you go take your nap”

 

“Ok Mommy” Olivia sweetly responded as Clarke carefully placed her on the floor, as she landed she ran over to her Mama holding her arms out, Lexa leant down hugging her daughter gently smiling when Olivia released the hug and looked up at her pursing her lips slightly, leaning forward she pecked her daughter on the lips watching as Olivia smiled and turned around and ran out of the room making them both laugh at her actions.

 

The two women remained silent for a few minutes before Clarke moved a little closer to Lexa, still carrying the notepad in her hand, stopping in front of the desk she placed the notepad in front of Lexa smiling softly at her. “How did you manage to get her doing that?” She softly asked suddenly not able to think of anything but how long it’d been since she’d seen Lexa at this desk, along with thinking about the numerous naughty things they had done on that desk since they brought it.

 

“I did Oscar’s hair and Olivia appeared asking me to do hers, when I finished Oscar was gone so we came looking for him…and found you and him fast asleep on the couch so I asked her if she wanted to help me write a song, when we got in here I asked her if her teachers had taught her to write her name yet and she said no…. she asked me to teach her so I did”

 

“And she got it that quick?”

 

“Yeah…. first I wrote out her name about twenty times…she wrote over all of them and then tried it on her own and nailed it”

 

“Now all we need to do is get Oscar doing the same….” Clarke softly said looking away for a second before looking back to Lexa unable to stop the smile spreading across her face “It’s been a while since you’ve sat at this desk”

 

“Yeah it’s been a while”

 

“So um….” Clarke stopped herself from asking Lexa if they should have their talk now, she knew they needed to but right now she was just enjoying having Lexa around, and right now she didn’t want to hear Lexa telling her that they were over for good, instead she opted for a different subject “What was this you mentioned about an extra spicy sub”

 

“I put them in the microwave I put them on plates as well so all we have to do is heat them up”

 

“Great…. should we go eat then? I’ll even throw in a green tea”

 

“You drive a hard bargain Clarke…but deal” Lexa responded, she knew Clarke all too well and she knew Clarke and she knew the Blonde was avoiding bringing up the talk they needed to have. Deciding not to push it at this moment in time she smiled at the blonde standing up pushing the chair back with the back of her knees, walking over to Clarke she motioned for the blonde to lead the way to the kitchen which she did. Walking through the living room they smiled when they came across the image of the twins laying on the couch their heads resting next to each other’s as their bodies stretched out across the couch. Not stopping in case they woke the twins up both women continued to walk through the living room until they reached the kitchen, once inside the kitchen Clarke motioned to the table, following the motion knowing what it meant Lexa made her way over to the table sitting down at the table she waited patiently for Clarke and the food that awaited them.

 

Twenty Minutes passed by, Clarke and Lexa both ate their subs in silence Clarke made Lexa the green tea, the whole time they were eating both women were trying to think of a conversation starter neither of them coming up with anything they thought the other would answer. Eventually they both finished eating their subs, Clarke stood up picking up the plates without a word to Lexa and carried them over to the sink placing them inside it she nervously took a breath making herself a coffee she walked back over to the table sitting down at the table placing her hands on the table, her wedding finger absent of a ring as it had been for months now, her eyes were drawn to her finger and how bare it looked without the ring, hell even how bare it felt without the ring the question in the her mind completely disappearing with any thoughts she had, that was until she heard Lexa’s voice saying what she herself had wanted to say moments beforehand:

 

“So should we have this talk then?”

 

“Yes”


	12. THE TALK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa and Clarke have THE TALK, and we get more of an insight into Clarke's mindframe and what she was thinking and feeling at the time she found out

** Chapter Twelve-THE TALK **

Clarke looked up from her hand until her eyes met with Lexa’s that deep dark green that she was reminded of everyday when she looked at her children. But these eyes gave her a different feeling inside, a feeling that made her heart beat a little faster than perhaps it should, more than anything it took her breath away, the feeling amazed her everytime she felt it no matter how long they were apart or how long they’d been together Lexa still made her feel this way, and if she was honest with herself she missed it massively. Taking a deep breath and shaking the thoughts out of her head she softly spoke;

 

“Where do you wanna start?”

 

“Um…I suppose we should start with why you didn’t come to me when Octavia told you?”

 

“I don’t know…. I was scared more than anything Lexa, scared that it was true that you were not the one true love I thought you were for all those years. I know I should have come to you and trusted you because I love you but I trusted Octavia’s word”

 

“More than me?”

 

“No but just as much….” Clarke paused for a second bringing her hands to clasp together on the table “I loved you so much that I thought maybe I was blinded by that love, the day she told me I got home and you had come home early and made me dinner you were being so…. you, that I put it to the back of my mind because I couldn’t believe it not when you did things like that, not when you held my hand and kissed me like I was the only person in the world that meant a thing to you”

 

“Because you were….”

 

“I know that Lex…...so I pushed it to the back of my mind…” Clarke sadly explained as she pushed the echo of Lexa’s words to the back of her mind, you were meant she wasn’t anymore and that thought almost broke her inside. “I tried to ignore it but then we bumped into Nia at the store and she made that comment about the twins being lying little scum like both their moms and you”

 

“Told you to leave it alone…” Lexa completed hanging her head slightly as she remembered the altercation a mere week and a half before Clarke accused her of cheating

 

“At first I got what you said because starting a fight with her in front of the kids wouldn’t have been a good idea, but the more I thought about it the more my mind ran away with itself. I couldn’t stop myself from thinking that maybe you were sticking up for her, because you and her were having an affair. I didn’t tell anyone and the more I went into myself, and my brain the more I felt different when you’d touch me or kiss me…to the point that you noticed”

 

“So you got so into yourself that you couldn’t ask me a question?”

 

“Yes…because a part of me didn’t want to know the answer”

 

“So you didn’t trust me one hundred percent”

 

“No because I knew I trusted you, and I thought that trusting you would make me blind to the truth. The more I looked into your eyes the more I didn’t trust myself to be able to see the truth. No matter what way I looked I couldn’t see a way that I wasn’t lied to in some way or another”

 

“So you didn’t trust me because you loved me too much….that doesn’t make sense Clarke”

 

“I know it doesn’t Lexa, but the more I tried to make sense of it the more it didn’t make sense at all….so I decided to confront you”

 

“And what I said made you think I was cheating?”

 

“You went off at me Lexa….I had never seen you like that before, it made me think that there was stuff in you I hadn’t seen”

 

“That makes no sense Clarke, what did you expect me to do? ….you accused me of breaking our vows, vows I didn’t take lightly not one bit; I was the one that proposed to you Clarke why would I do that just to go out and break that vow…I’m not my father” Lexa responded the anger and upset clear in her voice as she pushed herself back on the chair.

 

“I never said you were Lex…I didn’t mean it like that…”

 

“Then how did you mean it Clarke?”

 

“I meant that….I don’t know Lexa it felt like I couldn’t trust what I felt, that no matter how much I believed you wouldn’t do that to me I couldn’t believe my own judgement. You were my world Lexa, and the more I believed it wasn’t true the more I started to think that maybe I was fooling myself”

 

“I don’t get anything your saying Clarke, how could you not hear what Octavia said and still not know I was telling the truth”

 

“I told you, all she told me was that you slept with Nia she told me about Monroe but I never understood why Raven couldn’t find out until now. I trusted her as my best friend I didn’t think that she was hiding something serious from Raven, I thought it was something small that Raven would over react to”

 

“My sister doesn’t over react Clarke; you should know that by now”

 

“She has before Lexa…can we not get into an argument please”

 

“We not getting into an argument Clarke…there’s a lot to that story you don’t know and I do”

 

“Ok I’m sorry….What I was trying to say was I trusted Octavia and what she was saying, I didn’t think that she was covering anything up or that she wouldn’t know if Nia was lying…I thought that if Nia had been lying Octavia would have known, she knows you and she told me she believed it”

 

“So you believed her more than you believed in us and in me?”

 

“No, I trusted her more than I trusted myself to see the signs”

 

“Is this about your ex?”

 

“This has nothing to do with Niylah”

 

“Really? Because when we got together you accused me of cheating on you just like now, and I know that she cheated on you and broke your heart, I hate that she did that to you Clarke but if you can’t trust me and my word after eight years because of her sleeping with someone behind your back that’s not fair”

 

“It has nothing to do with her I promise, I just didn’t trust myself it wasn’t to do with you or with what Niylah did to me, and I just didn’t think I could trust myself. I didn’t think I deserved the happy ever after and I thought that you cheating made sense in my mind because it was what I deserved”

 

“You thought you deserved being cheated on?”

 

“It’s stupid forget I said anything…” Clarke quickly said thinking about how stupid she sounded, standing up she turned around walking to the back door, unlocking it she walked through it walking onto the porch and sitting down on the bench that looked out onto the back garden.

 

Lexa sat at the table contemplating what to do the more she thought about Clarke’s words the more nothing made sense. Standing up she walked to the kitchen doorway frame peeking into the living room making sure the twins were still asleep, seeing they were she turned back around walking towards the back door picking up Clarke’s coffee and her tea she held them both in one hand opening the back door with her free hand, walking through the door she carefully closed the door too, so they could hear the twins if they woke up. Seeing Clarke sitting on the bench she walked over taking a seat next to her she carefully separated the cups holding the coffee in front of Clarke. Seeing the upset and the slight stains of tears on Clarke’s face she softly asked “Are you ok?”

 

“I’m fine” Clarke responded sniffling softly before turning and taking the coffee handed to her by Lexa “Thanks” She softly said half looking at Lexa before turning her attention back to the garden in front of her. Taking a sip of the coffee, she softly said, “I’m sorry I walked out”

 

“It’s ok…..I just want you to talk to me Clarke, this whole situation could have been avoided if we just talked….Something is bothering you and holding it in isn’t gonna help you anymore Clarke…we need to talk about this before it’s too late”

 

“Isn’t it already too late?”

 

“No…..I told you not even a week ago that I love you Clarke, I miss you all the time, I miss our family I miss waking up to you every morning and eating breakfast as a family. I want all of that back Clarke more than anything I want it back. And I think you want that all as well, but I can’t do it on my own Clarke, I need you to talk to me and tell me why you couldn’t trust yourself or me.” Lexa turned herself on the bench slightly holding her cup in her left hand; she stretched her arm out across the top of the bench gently placing her hand on Clarke’s shoulder “Talk to me Clarke”

 

Clarke took a deep breath in turning herself slightly relishing in the contact Lexa was giving her right now. Holding onto the cup with a little more strength she perhaps needed to, she took a small breath before talking “I did think I deserved to be cheated on”

 

“Why Clarke? I know that you wouldn’t cheat on me so that can’t be it”

 

“How do you know that?”

 

“Because I know you”

 

Clarke could not help the few tears that escaped her eyes rushing down her cheeks, quickly wiping the tears away she got a breath and spoke “You remember when Niylah came back?”

 

“Years ago Yeah, you and her went for coffee and she asked you to take her back”

 

“Well I thought about it”

 

“What do you mean you thought about it?”

 

“We had that massive argument about me and Niylah seeing each other…you got really angry at me for not telling you straight away and we shouted at each other until you walked out…..Niylah called me a while after and for a while I wanted to go with her until I saw you again”

 

“That doesn’t mean you deserve to be cheated on Clarke….we were both angry, I was maybe a little angrier mainly due to the jealously but that just makes you human Clarke…you didn’t want to leave right?”

 

“No”

 

“Then why did you think about it?”

 

“I thought you were going to break up with me, that I was going to lose you”

 

“How long did you think about it for?”

 

“Ten minutes maybe but that doesn’t matter”

 

“I does Clarke, your human and you’re entitled to have doubts at times”

 

“I know Lex, but I keep on doubting you”

 

“Have there been other times? That you’ve doubted me”

 

“A few other times”

 

“Tell me Clarke….the only way we can work this out is to talk to each other”

 

“I had a few times where I thought it might be better if we broke up or I left”

 

“If you left me?”

 

“I thought you were too good for me, and sometimes I felt like if I left you then you would be better off without me”

 

“When did this start? Has it been since we started dating, or did it start later on?”

 

“It started mainly when I was pregnant and got worse after I had the twins”

 

“Any time before then?”

 

“No, it was after the twins’ it got worse. Mainly when we would argue about something, even a small disagreement would make me feel a little anxious”

 

“So most of the time you thought about it you were stressed in some way?”

 

“I suppose so but that doesn’t make it right Lexa”

 

“I know it doesn’t but you never followed through with the thoughts….and they were just thoughts right?”

 

“Yeah…I would never leave you…”

 

“Then why are you beating yourself up?”

 

“Because I shouldn’t have thought about it not even for a second, no matter what even if I was stressed”

 

Lexa removed her right arm from the top of the bench placing her cup on the floor she reached forward taking Clarke’s cup from her and placing it on the floor next to hers. Sitting back up straight, she reached out taking hold of Clarke’s hands with her own, looking into Clarke’s eyes. “Everyone thinks things that they don’t act on, it doesn’t mean your gonna follow through on them or that you’re a bad person Clarke….and it doesn’t mean you deserve to be cheated on either”

 

“I know but before O told me, I was nagging you all the time to change the den, I thought that you were gonna leave me”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because you’d walk away from me and you were spending more time away…I know it was to plan the surprise getaway for us but I didn’t know that and I couldn’t think of anything but you leaving me…so I nagged you more”

 

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

 

“I couldn’t because I thought you’d leave”

 

“So you’ve had times since we’ve been together where you thought I’d leave you”

 

“Yes…..What I felt for you was so pure and strong that it scared me at the beginning, when we were together everything was great and perfect like it was meant to be…” Clarke paused as she felt more tears escaping her eyes running down her cheeks and onto her and Lexa’s joined hands “But when you’d leave I’d feel empty like I was missing something, it scared me Lexa we were Seventeen I’d only had one other relationship and that ended really badly, I thought that you loving me was too good to be true”

 

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

 

“I was scared you’d freak out”

 

“What about when we became serious?”

 

“It wasn’t as bad, I felt more secure especially after you told me you loved me, I’d feel fine no matter what until….”

 

“Until what Clarke?”

 

“When Nia was around”

 

“And that’s why you found it easy to believe I cheated, because it was with her”

 

“I suppose so…nothing justifies it Lex, but I believed I deserved it and I believed my best friend wouldn’t lie to me, I didn’t know she had an alternative agenda”

 

“I hate that you’ve been feeling this way for so long Clarke but you know that doesn’t make you not trusting me right?”

 

“I know it doesn’t Lex but I couldn’t get it out of my head…the way you are with her, you two flirt all the time you still friends”

 

“I don’t flirt with her Clarke, I’m friendly to her I don’t want anything to do with her after what she said about the twin’s, I hate her Clarke I’m civil because my cousin works at her restaurant…I do everything I can to stay away from her”

 

“I know you told me all of this Lexa but I can’t stop my brain from thinking it sometimes”

 

“So why did you believe Octavia?”

 

“That’s the thing, I really don’t know Lex, and I trusted my own doubts and my friendship more than I trusted you and I know that’s unforgivable, but now I know all I can think is how stupid I was not to trust you and I know I can’t take it back”

 

“No you can’t Clarke….but you can tell me what you believe now”

 

“I don’t believe anything I know you didn’t cheat on me Lexa…I know I was stupid to hide what I was feeling from you…I ruined everything because I was an idiot, I let Nia and Roan get into my head like the stupid idiot I am”. Clarke finished more tears escaping her eyes as she tried to pull her hands from Lexa’s only for the brunette to hold on.

 

“Hey look at me…” Clarke did as Lexa looked up at her and into her eyes, “You trusted your best friend was telling you the truth, yes there were other things that contributed to you believing what you did. I can’t change the past Clarke and neither can you, it’s a lot easier to look back and say we should have done this or that, we’ve been through a lot together Clarke and I know you better than I know myself sometimes.” Lexa softly squeezed Clarke’s hands removing her left hand and bringing it up to wipe away the tears from Clarke’s cheeks “We should have done things differently, both of us, both me and you, but I can’t move forward without knowing that you trust me”

 

“I do trust you Lexa”

 

“And what if something else comes up, what if someone tells you that I cheated on you, then what?”

 

“I’ll talk to you like I should have before”

 

“How do I know that for sure Clarke?”

 

“Because I felt a year of sadness and loneliness without you, it is terrible and it was everything I was scared of. I just want you back; more than anything, I want our family back. I miss being with you every day, I miss that feeling you gave me whenever you looked at me, that feeling I get when you’re around I miss it, I miss being me.”

 

“So if both agreed to get back together, you’d trust me one hundred percent?”

 

“I would”

 

“Would you trust yourself?”

 

“Yes I would”

 

“Ok, you need to promise me that if your feeling stressed or like you think I’ll leave you, you have to talk to me Clarke….I need to know that you trust me in every single thing in our lives”

 

“I do Lex….I wanted us to get back together as soon as you moved out but I couldn’t find it in myself to talk to you….”

 

“And what’s different?”

 

“I lost you” Clarke honestly responded looking deep into Lexa’s eyes, she admitted “The last year has been the worst of my life and I just want it to be over”

 

“Ok then.”

 

“Ok?”

 

“Ok”

 

“What do you mean Ok Lex?”

 

“Ok we can move on….this is far from over Clarke but knowing you were battling stuff in your own mind makes it a little easier for me to understand why you believed it so much, add in Octavia and Monroe being people you trusted, and then add in me being less than thrilled when you called me out on it. I understand some stuff… and some other stuff I don’t understand at all and I’m gonna need you to explain to me over time…but I love you and I know that we belong together…..I just want this to be over Clarke”

 

“Me too” Clarke responded the smile threatening to burst onto her face at Lexa’s words. However, before she let the smile fill her face she looked at Lexa and honestly asked, “What does that mean though? I know it means we both want to move on and be together, but how are we going to do it?”

 

“Well I’m not gonna move back in for a start”

 

“Ok”

 

“I know that might upset you but I can’t just pretend that we’re back to normal, and that nothing happened, we need to work on getting back to us, and I think you need to be you for a little bit not because I don’t want us to be back together, but because I think you need to be Clarke for a while. And you won’t have to worry about me leaving, because you’re stuck with me”

 

“So we are back together?”

 

“Yes…but we’re gonna take it slow because right now I think we both need that.”

 

“And what does taking it slow involve?”

 

“It involves us getting back to where we were, date nights, family nights and nights out alone. You haven’t had a night out on your own for nearly five years Clarke, since we broke up I’ve had my time out with Raven and I realised how much I missed it….I don’t regret for one second marrying you or having the twins but maybe it’ll do you good being able to get out and be Clarke”

 

“That sounds really good actually….being Clarke sounds great”

 

“It should because Mommy is great but Clarke….wow she is out of this world and I think…” Lexa slowly moved her left hand up to Clarke’s cheek, gently caressing the skin underneath her hand as she looked into Clarke’s eyes “I think Clarke and Mommy combined is the most amazing, caring, beautiful and intelligent person in the world”

 

“Thank you”

 

“You don’t need to thank me Clarke…just promise me that you’ll talk to me, no matter what your worrying about you’ll talk to me”

 

“I promise” Clarke responded placing her hand on top of Lexa’s as she softly asked “What about everything else?” Clarke instantly regretted the question when Lexa removed her hand and sat up a little more bringing her hand o rest gently on Clarke’s left hand, which was still on her lap, holding on to Lexa’s hand as the brunette responded;

 

“We can do whatever you want Clarke, if you want to keep me seeing the twins to a weekly thing then we can, whatever you want Clarke, it’s up to you”

 

“So if I wanted you to stay over every weekend could we do that?”

 

“Um…” Lex stuttered slightly at the request, it was not what she thought Clarke was going to say to her. “If you um…if you want that then yeah we can do that”

 

“Good” Clarke paused for a second before adding “And maybe on one of the nights you stay over we can have a date night?”

 

“That’d be great….and in time we can work out what to do about the divorce”

 

“I’ve already done something about that”

 

“You have?”

 

“Yeah, I spoke to my lawyer and told him that I didn’t want to go through with it. And he said that because the papers haven’t been drawn up yet so all I have to do is retract my petition for divorce and that’s it”

 

“So did you retract it?”

 

“I wanted to talk to you first”

 

“Well you’ve talked to me so you can tell him that we don’t want to get divorced anymore….unless you still want to get one that is?”

 

“No I don’t want to get a divorce Lexa, I never did…I just let myself get caught up in Roan and all the rubbish he was spitting out…I really thought that he was being a good friend”

 

“I know you were Clarke, let’s not go backwards ok?” Clarke nodded softly at Lexa’s words smiling softly at Lexa “Good then you talk to your lawyer and cancel the divorce…and start wearing your wedding ring as well”

 

“I will…as long as you wear yours as well” Clarke smiled as she watched Lexa laugh softly and reach up to her neck reaching her hand underneath her shirt slightly, removing a necklace underneath the shirt she pulled it from under the shirt revealing a long necklace with her wedding ring on the end. Removing the ring from the necklace she looked at Clarke smirking at her slightly, Clarke returned the smirk reaching her hand inside her t-shirt and revealing a similar necklace to Lexa’s with her wedding ring on the end of it, doing as Lexa had done she removed the ring holding it between her index finger and her thumb.

 

Both women gently laughed at the fact that they had both chosen to keep their rings in the same place unknowingly. Looking down at the ring in her hand, Clarke didn’t have time to say anything to Lexa as the brunette’s hand came into her line of sight removing the ring from in between her index finger and her thumb, following Lexa’s hand she looked up into the brunette’s eyes, returning her eyes to Lexa’s hand wondering what she was about to do. Watching Lexa’s hand moving closer to hers she smiled softly as Lexa took her left hand in her own, carefully holding the ring in her right hand as she slowly placed Clarke’s ring back on her wedding finger. Smiling at the smile gracing Lexa’s face she reached forward retrieving Lexa’s ring she did as Lexa had done seconds ago, holding the ring carefully in her hand placing the ring on Lexa’s wedding finger, her hand holding onto Lexa’s for a few seconds before she let go. Looking up she softly spoke;

 

“It feels like we should seal this with a kiss” When Lexa didn’t respond but her face looked slightly dumbfounded as if she didn’t know what to say “I was joking Lexa…I know we’re not there yet”

 

“I’m sorry…I just didn’t know how to respond”

 

“It’s ok; I didn’t really know what else to say…so…yeah sorry”

 

“You don’t need to apologise, or worry about what you say to me…I mean we’ve done and said A LOT of things to each other”

 

“Yeah we have” Clarke responded unable to stop the dirty thoughts seep into her mind, it’d been a long time since her and Lexa had talked about anything more than the twins had, and she had to admit it felt great. Her dirty thoughts

 

“Clarke Griffin…are you thinking dirty thoughts?”

 

“When you’re around….always…” Clarke responded both her and Lexa giggling softly at the comment, neither one of them feeling the tension that had been between them over the last year. “And it’s Woods”

 

“What is?”

 

“My surname or my family name as you told our daughter….not Clarke Griffin as you said but Clarke Woods”

 

“Oh of course, my apologies Clarke Woods” Lexa couldn’t stop the smile spreading across her face hearing Clarke use her surname was Woods’ is was something small in the grand scale of things, but it made her smile and gave her hope that they could get back to where they were before everything happened. Taking a small breath in she looked at Clarke genuinely smiling at her, not wanting the time they were having alone to end she softly asked “Do you want another coffee?”

 

“Um no….actually I’ll have a tea please”

 

“One of my tea’s? Are you coming over to the dark side?”

 

“Dark side? Please Lexa…I meant a normal tea, you know English tea like normal none health obsessed people drink” Clarke sassily responded smirking at Lexa supressing a laugh as she looked at Lexa’s amused expression.

 

“Oh someone’s got some sass back…..I like it…” Lexa softly smiling reaching down and picking up the mugs before standing up “One English tea coming right up Mrs Woods”. She softly laughed entering into the house, the talk between her and Clarke hadn’t gone the way she planned and as much as she wanted to be angry at Clarke she couldn’t be, not knowing that the main reason Clarke believed she’d cheat was because she was doubting herself more than anything. Absentmindedly she moved around the kitchen thinking about her and Clarke’s talk, minutes pasted and she had made up two cups of ‘English’ Tea, having looked in the cupboard finding there were no more Mint teas left. Once she had removed the teabags and added the necessary sugars to both cups, she carried the cups outside carefully opening the door with her foot, thankful that the door didn’t slam when she let go of it. Walking the short distance to the bench where Clarke was still sat she handed one of the cups to her, before taking a seat next Clarke smiling softly at the blonde, as she softly commented to her;

 

“So you decided to ditch the mint tea huh?”

 

“Oh huh huh Clarke…I just decided to have something different”

 

“Ok Lex”

 

 After a few moments of silence, Lexa spoke “Can I ask you something?” She cautiously asked looking out to the garden in front of her

 

“Of course you can”

 

“I know you said if something comes up then you’ll talk to me but…Are you gonna trust me now?” Lexa asked turning to look at Clarke, seeing the slight upset on Clarke’s face she added “Forget I asked” She finished attempting to turn back to face the garden only to be stopped by Clarke’s hand gently on her right arm. The motion caused her to look back to Clarke, relaxing back against the bench again.

 

“No it’s ok you deserve an answer”

 

“I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable Clarke”

 

“No it’s fine Lex honestly…” Clarke reassuringly said gently squeezing her hand around Lexa’s arm, at the moment Lexa turned herself a little so they were face to face, moving her left hand over Clarke’s and gently taking hold of it removing her arm from underneath it. The gesture was small and kind but made her feel a million times more at ease than she was seconds before. Taking a deep breath in she looked at Lexa and began to answer the question. “I can’t promise that I won’t get jealous, but I can promise you that I will talk to you when I’m feeling anxious or scared about something. We lost a year together because I couldn’t trust that you loved me enough to be faithful. And that is completely on me and I accept full responsibility for that, all I can do now is improve on myself and begin to trust myself more than anything…maybe with your help as well”

 

“Whatever I can do to help you Clarke I will….but you have to trust me” Lexa paused for a second wrapping her right arm around Clarke’s shoulder’s resting it slightly on the top of the bench as well. Keeping her left hand holding onto Clarke’s. “That means talking to me when you’re stressed, and trusting what I say to you. If Nia really wants to break us up for good, then you know that she’s going to keep trying. And that means making up more lies, if you don’t fully trust me then we’re going to keep running into problems”

 

“I do trust you Lexa…I just didn’t trust that I deserved you enough, it wasn’t about you Lex, it was about me…I can’t explain to you fully because I don’t fully understand and I know that’s a rubbish excuse. But I’m gonna call Wells and ask if he can maybe help me with that, I talked to my dad last night and he thinks that’s the best option”

 

“Last night? …Were you crying?”

 

“Um yeah I was, how did you know that?”

 

“Olivia woke up last night because she was feeling sick, she said that she heard you crying so she went back to sleep” Seeing the upset creeping onto Clarke’s face she quickly continued “Hey don’t get upset, she only went back to bed because she didn’t want to upset you more. She wasn’t scared or anything she was just being a good girl in her mind.” As she looked at Clarke’s face, she instantly noticed the tears begin to escape Clarke’s eyes shuffling closer to Clarke she wrapped her arms around Clarke’s shoulders a little more. Gently rubbing her hand up and down Clarke’s shoulder, she soothingly whispered into Clarke’s ear “Don’t cry Clarke…”

 

“This is all my fault; everything that’s happened is my fault”

 

“Hey listen…Kids do things all the time to make their parents happy, she didn’t want to upset you so she didn’t come into your room. That isn’t your fault”

 

“She didn’t want to upset me because I’ve been a rubbish Mom to her since you left”

 

“No you haven’t, she loves you Clarke. She wants to make you proud of her”

 

“But she trusts you more”

 

“No she doesn’t Clarke…she loves us both the same, she doesn’t have a favourite.”

 

“Who does she want after a nightmare though? Or when she wants her hair done”

 

“Yeah maybe she wants me for those things but she doesn’t want me all the time….she wants you when she feels scared, she wants you when she wants her medicine, or wants to have wash her hair, or watch a princess movie…there are so many things she prefers you for Clarke. Just like Oscar, some things he wants me for and others he wants you”

 

“You’re just trying to make me feel better”

 

“I’m not Clarke….well I am but I’m not lying about any of that stuff.” Lexa soothingly continued, pulling back a little so her and Clarke were face to face again, placing her right hand on Clarke’s neck she continued “Your beating yourself up for not believing me, and you’re doing it by finding anything to make yourself feel worse, anything to give you ammunition against yourself. But you can’t keep doing this to yourself Clarke; we can’t move forwards whilst looking backwards…I forgive you ok…so please forgive yourself” Listening to Lexa’s words Clarke closed her eyes taking a deep breath in;

 

“You forgive me?”

 

“Yeah, I do” Lexa responded, the response caused Clarke to release a massive breath she wasn’t even aware she was holding in. Leaning her head forward slowly she smiled when her and Lexa’s foreheads connected, gently resting against each other’s. Both closing their eyes taking in the moment they were currently sharing. After a few moments passed, Lexa opened her eyes feeling an overwhelming urge to be closer to Clarke, as her eyes opened they instantly looked with Clarke’s who had opened her eyes at the same time as Lexa, looking into each other’s eyes they both began to slowly inch closer, both of them feeling the same urge’s rushing through their bodies before their lips could get close enough for either of them to contemplate what to do next, they both heard the door of the back garden opening.

 

Both women quickly shuffled back on the spot, their attention turning to the door. As their eyes landed on the door they both saw Oscar walking out of the house rubbing his eyes with his left hand whilst his right arm extended out behind him. As Oscar continued to walk forward his arm revealed his twin sisters hand tightly holding onto her brothers as he guided her outside, her face filled with slight sadness, stopping and turning Oscar smiled at his Mom’s as he turned to his sister comfortingly holding onto her hand and half hugging her “See Liv, Mommy is here” He softly said to his sister half pointing at his Mommy. Seeing the slight upset on Olivia’s face Clarke placed her arm out in the air, placing her cup on the floor as she did so:

 

“Hey Princess, did you have a nice nap?”

 

Olivia looked up at her Mommy letting go of her brothers hands she smiled half running half walking over to her Mommy smiling, as Olivia reached her Clarke lifted her off the floor and onto her lap smiling when Olivia clung to her instantly before looking up at her and softly speaking “I missed you Mommy”

 

“You missed me? But I didn’t go anywhere”

 

“I missed cuddling you Mommy”

 

“You did?”

 

“Yeah, you give good cuddles Mommy”

 

“I do…” Clarke smiled wrapping her arms tightly around her daughter holding onto her tightly, small giggles escaping her daughter’s lungs as she hugged her.

 

As Clarke hugged Olivia, Oscar rubbed his eyes once more before smiling brightly at his Mama before running towards her climbing onto her lap, leaning up and smiling brightly at her “Mama, is my hair still perfect?” He asked brightly smiling at her as his hands came to rest on her shoulder and the material that covered them. Lexa smiled softly at her son reaching up and pushing a few strands of Oscar’s hair back into place, before leaning forward and carefully kissing her son on the cheek:

 

“There you go perfect again”

 

“Thank you Mama”

 

“You’re welcome…” Lexa softly responded as Oscar leant forward resting his head against her shoulder, his eyes concentrating on the cup in Lexa’s left hand, seeing where her son’s attention was Lexa softly asked “Would you like some Oz?” Seeing the massive smile on his face knowing he more than likely thought the cup held Mint tea, “It’s not Mint though baby…”

 

“What is it Mama?”

 

“It’s normal Tea”

 

“What is normal Tea Mama?”

 

“It’s just normal tea leafs, not Mint one’s…you wanna try some?” Oscar lifted his head smiling and nodding his head at his Mama. Laughing softly Lexa raised the cup up bringing it to her son’s lips letting him take a sip, watching him she softly smiled when a massive smile spread across Oscar’s face and her let out a small ‘Ah’ looking down at him she asked “You like it?”

 

“It’s nice Mama”

 

“Better than the mint?”

 

“No”

 

“NO” Lexa jokingly responded faking a surprise expression as she looked at her son “Why not?”

 

“Mint is the best Mama”

 

“I know, but we don’t have any more so Mama had to have this” Seeing the amused look on Clarke’s face as she cuddled their daughter she turned herself and Oscar slightly, raising her eyebrows at Clarke she asked “And what is that look for?” Clarke did as she had done seconds before tuning herself and Olivia slightly until they were facing each other a little more.

 

“What was it you said to me? ...oh yeah you decided to have something different”

 

“Hey I did… I mean yeah it was mainly because I had no other choice but still…”

 

“And you couldn’t have made yourself a coffee instead?”

 

“You’re almost out of Coffee as well”

 

“Oh, well that’s embarrassing… However, in my defence I was meant to go shopping today, but these two got sick so I couldn’t…”

 

“You don’t need to be embarrassed, my apartment is terrible, I have Mint Tea and loads of ready meals in case I can’t be bothered to cook”

 

“Well that doesn’t sound depressing at all Lex”

 

“Hey you leave my mildly depressing apartment alone” Lexa smirked softly laughing as she looked at Clarke who was also giggling softly at her words. Looking down at Oscar, she noticed her son looked like he wanted to say something “What’s up Oz?”

 

“I feel better Mama”

 

“You do?” Lexa asked looking over at Clarke both of the knowing that Oscar loved going shopping, something about supermarkets seemed to capture the little boy’s imagination. She personally thought it was more to do with the toy section, one of the rewards of going to a massive supermarket was their toy section was massive as well. “You wanna go to the supermarket don’t you?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama’s question.

 

“Can we go Mama? …I’ll be really good Mama I promise”

 

Lexa looked over at Clarke her eyes asking if it was a good idea, with a smile and a small nod confirming it was ok for her to take her son shopping if she wanted “But you’re not dressed?, you can’t go into the supermarket in your pyjamas”

 

“I can get dressed Mama…really quick…please Mama”

 

“Ok…but you have to get dressed now, and don’t ruin your hair ok?”

 

“Ok Mama…I’ll be really quick I promise…”

 

“Good boy” She responded as Oscar raised himself up on his knees, hugging his Mama tightly kissing his Mama on the cheek before shuffling down on to the floor stopping in front of his sister when his Mama spoke “Brush your teeth as well Mister”

 

“Ok Mama….Liv, you wanna come shopping?” Olivia shook her head at her brother’s sweet question “Ok” He simply responded, smiling brightly up at his Mommy before turning and walking quickly into the house heading towards his bedroom.

 

As the door closed too, Lexa shuffled a little closer to Clarke and Olivia looking down at her daughter she softly asked “You ok princess?” Olivia nodded her head softly “You wanna stay with Mommy huh?” Olivia again nodded her head at her Mama, looking up at her a little, more she slowly lifted herself up.

 

“Can I have Mama Cuddles and kisses?”

 

“Of course…now or later? ….or both?”

 

Olivia giggled softly looking to Clarke who was smiling softly at her, looking back to her Mama she softly said “Both Mama”

 

“Good” Lexa reached her arms out lifting Olivia into her arms smiling as Olivia pursed her lips at her Mama, smiling and giggling softly Lexa leaned forward kissing her softly gently, before placing loving kisses across her daughter’s cheek, as Olivia giggled a dirty laugh escaping her mouth as her Mama peppered kisses on her cheek, pulling back. As the laugh died in Olivia’s throat, she softly asked, “You feel better?” Olivia smiled at her Mama nodding her head softly:

 

“Can I have medicine please Mama?”

 

“Now?”

 

“Yes please”

 

“Ok then” She responded her and Clarke exchanging a slightly shocked look. Before Lexa stood up lifting Olivia firmly onto her chest as she did so. “Come on Mommy, let’s get this trouble maker some medicine” She smiled holding her now free hand in the air for Clarke, smiling up at Lexa the blonde smiled standing up and taking hold of Lexa’s hand opening the door for the brunette to walk through, making sure she held the door open until Lexa walked through. They both walked to the counter where Olivia’s medicine was, going to sit her daughter down on the counter she stopped when Olivia held onto her tighter. Seeing the motion, Clarke stepped forward picking up the medicine and removing it from the packaging, she grabbed a spoon, pouring some of the medicine onto the spoon, she hoovered it in front of Olivia’s mouth seeing the hesitation on her daughter’s face. She watched as Olivia looked up at Lexa, who smiled and nodded in encouragement before turning and looking back at her, opening her mouth wide she leant forward allowing her Mommy to give her the medicine. Removing the spoon Clarke watched as Olivia swallowed the medicine softly smiling and leaning her head on her Mama’s shoulder.

 

“It tastes like Mint Mommy”

 

“I know it does, it’s your favourite isn’t it?”

 

“Yeah…Mama likes Mint as well”

 

“I know it is, that’s why she’s taking Oscar shopping…because she wants her special tea”

 

“Mommy can we watch a princess movie?”

 

“Mmmm maybe, but only if you do something for Mommy”

 

“Anything Mommy”

 

“Anything?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy making her smile brighter than she had all day “Well how about this….can I have Olivia cuddles during the movie?”

 

“Can I stay in my jama’s Mommy?”

 

“Yes you can…so can we cuddle?”

 

“YES” Olivia excited let out her arms shooting into the air as she giggled softly, after a second she looked at her Mommy gasping, “Can I get my covers Mommy? And make it comfy”

 

“Make the couch comfy?”

 

“Yes please Mommy”

 

“Ok…you can bring your covers down, but Oscar’s has to stay upstairs ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy” Olivia sweetly let out as Lexa placed her on the ground, looking up at her Mama, she softly said, “Don’t leave yet Mama, I’ll be right back”

 

“Ok I won’t princess I promise”

 

Olivia smiled up at her before turning and running out of the kitchen and up towards her room. Turning her attention to Clarke, she raised her right eyebrow smirking at the blonde laughing softly as Clarke rolled her eyes at her. “Shut up Lexa”

 

“I didn’t say a word”

 

“Stop looking at me like that”

 

“Like what?”

 

“You know exactly what I’m talking about Lexa”

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about; I’m just looking at you”

 

“Stop it” Clarke again stated, moving forward she pushed Lexa gently making the brunette laugh more than she already was. “Lexa stop it” Again Lexa continued to laugh this time more, the expression on Clarke’s face making her want to laugh even more. Lexa’s laughing only made Clarke more frustrated, trying to supress the smile on her own face she pushed against Lexa’s stomach “Stop” As she pushed against Lexa more her Lexa gently grabbed hold of her arms, smiling softly as she held Clarke’s arms close to her chest. Looking at Clarke, she raised both her eyebrows at Clarke before continuing to smirk and look down at Clarke:

 

“Just admit you’re a drama queen”

 

“I am not Lexa” Clarke responded as Lexa lowered her hands, moving Clarke’s arms with her bringing their chests closer together, neither of them thinking anything of the action, too caught up in the interaction. Their faces only a few inches away as Clarke looked at Lexa unimpressed at being called a drama queen. “Take it back Lexa, I’m not a drama queen”

 

“Hey it’s not a bad thing; I mean Oscar gets it from you…it’s really cute”

 

“Lexa stop it…” Clarke pouted, making Lexa laugh again, “it’s not funny…I am not a drama queen”

 

“Sure”

 

“Lexa I’m not….”

 

“Ok”

 

“No say it properly Lexa,” Clarke said moving her hands to gripping onto Lexa’s shirt pulling them a little closer together, their stomachs pressing together as she looked firmly at Lexa.

 

“Say what?” Lexa faked smirking at the firm look on Clarke’s face.

 

“Admit I’m not a drama queen…and I’ll admit I was wrong”

 

“If I admit you’re not a drama queen you’ll admit you overreacted and were wrong”

 

“Yes”

 

“Ok….” Lexa started taking a deep breath in; deciding not to continue winding Clarke up more than she already had “I was wrong you’re not a drama queen….”

 

“Ok, I admit I’m not a drama queen either”

 

“And…”

 

“And I may have slightly overreacted earlier”

 

“Only slightly?” Clarke gently slapped Lexa on the arm looking firmly at her as she looked at Lexa unimpressed “What Clarke? You overreacted slightly, I mean come on Princess Movies are your thing, you should know anything princess related you’re her favourite”

 

“Your right”

 

“I know I am”

 

“Fine…..I’m sorry I overreacted”

 

“Oh my gosh, how time has changed Clarke Woods just admitted she overreacted….I never thought I’d see the day”

 

“You’re so infuriating”

 

“Sure I am, that’s why you’re grabbing on me huh?”

 

“Whatever” Clarke let out smiling as she slowly removed them looking up at Lexa, as she went to move backwards Lexa wrapped her arms around Clarke’s waist pulling her back to her. “Lexa let me go.”

 

“Who’s the one grabbing now?”

 

“Oh I can remove my hands if you want”

 

“No” Clarke quickly and seriously responded, the air between them suddenly becoming thick and filled with what they both knew was sexual tension. As Lexa looked into her eyes, Clarke couldn’t help the bubbling of desire and hope inside her building and building until seconds later, and being this close to Lexa with Lexa’s arms wrapped around her waist, it became too much for her and she leant in her lips connected effortlessly and perfectly with Lexa’s….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed that chapter, I personally loved writing it as the whole 11 chapters before I teased a few things and finally got to write the big one, as I like to call it :-), anyways more trouble is to come believe me ;-) But will Clarke and Lexa make it through and work things out????? only time will tell :-)
> 
> Until then, stay safe peeps and peepettes and keep on fanficing and shipping :-)


	13. KISS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aftermath of Clarke and Lexa's kiss...How will Lexa react? ....Also Lexa runs into an old friend...is it romance related or not???? who knows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to anyone who has taken the time to read the chapters already posted. I hope you all enjoy this chapter and the next two which I am about to upload :-) Hope you all enjoy them. Please feel free to leave a comment...OH Also THANK YOU to everyone that has already commented or left Kudos :-) I appreciate the support

** Chapter Thirteen-Kiss **

As their lips stayed, connected Clarke felt the worry inside her quickly rise up until a second passed and Lexa’s lips were moving against hers, their lips moving in perfect time with each other’s. As their lips continued to move together, Lexa’s hands opened up and gently gripped onto the waistband of Clarke’s jeans, gently pulling her closer, as she felt Lexa pull her in Clarke moved her hands up to rest on the base of Lexa’s neck pulling her closer. Both women found themselves lost in the feeling of each other’s lips, something they hadn’t felt for over a year, neither one dared to break the kiss until minutes passed and they were forced to break apart when they heard Olivia calling out to her Mama:

 

“MAMA”

 

Breaking apart they both looked at each other a little breathless the lust in both of their eyes filled with a mixture of lust and happiness. Regaining her breath, Lexa licked her lips quickly swallowing softly before responding:

 

“Yes Princess”

 

Olivia came running into the kitchen stopping in front of Lexa as Clarke stepped across the kitchen leaning on the counter, trying her best to act normal in front of Olivia. As her Mama knelt down in front of her Olivia, spoke “Mama, Oscar is really upset”

 

“Why is he upset baby?”

 

“I don’t know Mama, he threw things, and he’s crying…he said he can’t find it Mama”

 

“Find what Baby?” Olivia shrugged her shoulders at her Mama, not knowing what was wrong with her brother. “Ok, I’ll go see him now”

 

“Thank You Mama…” Olivia sweetly said leaning forward hugging her Mama quickly before turning around and walking until she was in front of her Mommy. Quickly reaching up and grabbing her hand pulling on it “Come on Mommy, the couch is comfy”

 

“Is it now?”

 

“Yeah…super comfy Mommy”

 

“Ok then let’s go” Clarke responded sending Lexa a small smile as the brunette looked up at her. Letting their daughter pull her out of the kitchen and into the living room. Smiling when Olivia proudly pointed at the couch where she had set up her duvet cover across the couch, her pillows at the top of the couch perfectly placed. Leaning down Clarke lifted Olivia off of the ground kissing her on the cheek “It’s perfect princess” Pulling back, she stepped forward throwing her daughter gently into the air so that she landed on the couch. As Olivia landed on the couch she burst into laughter at her Mommy’s actions, rushing forward Clarke began tickling her daughter not seeing Lexa watching them as she walked up the stairs towards Oscar and Olivia’s bedroom.

 

As Lexa climbed the stairs, she smiled softly laughing to herself as she heard Olivia’s giggles filling up the house. As she entered the twins’ bedroom, her mind quickly turned to her son, the floor was covered in his clothes and some of his toys, seeing him ruffling through his clothe draws tears covering his face. Quickly stepping into the room she stopped right next to Oscar gaining his attention “Hey my prince what’s wrong?” Hearing his Mama’s voice Oscar turned around launching himself at his Mama wrapping his arms around her

 

“I can’t find it Mama” He let out softly crying into her shoulder as he held onto her tightly

 

“Find what Oscar?”

 

“My Mama jacket….I lost it”

 

“Oh Oz…its ok don’t cry”

 

“But it’s gone Mama…and I want it back”

 

“Hey it’s ok…” She softly soothed Oscar, carefully pulling herself and her son apart, she reached up wiping his tears away she looked around the room seeing a light blur checkered button up shirt on her son’s bed, she noticed Oscar was now wearing a plain black t-shirt with dark blue jeans, ones that matched the jeans and t-shirt she was currently wearing. Looking at Oscar, she softly said, “Are you going to wear that shirt today?” Oscar nodded his head sadly “Ok, well it’s too hot for a leather jacket today, so we can leave it today and find it later on ok?”

 

“But you wear yours Mama”

 

“Well I’ll leave my jacket here, and I won’t wear it until you find yours, ok?”

 

“Thank you Mama” He said leaning forward hugging his Mama again squeezing her tightly, pulling back he leant forward kissing his Mama lightly on the lips before standing up straight and wiping his face “Is my face fine Mama?”

 

“Your face is perfect…” Lexa responded smiling at her son, gently reaching up and tapping his chin “Why don’t you go get your trainers on and Mama will tidy up”

 

“I can tidy Mama”

 

“I know you can baby, but Mama will do it for you…just this once”

 

“Thank you Mama”

 

“Your welcome….now go quickly” She playfully said seeing the smile spread across her son’s face as he excitedly ran past his Mama “Walk down the stairs Oscar”. She softly reminded hearing her son respond with a small ‘Ok Mama’ laughing to herself softly standing up she began picking up the toys and clothes all over the floor quickly placing them back in their rightful places. She stood herself up looking around the now tidy room she walked over to Oscar’s bed picking up the shirt he had left behind, carefully fixing his bed she turned walking out of the bedroom. Walking across the hallway, glancing back at what used to be her and Clarke’s bedroom, her mind filling with the possibility of being back in the room at some point soon, the thoughts forced a smile onto her face before she turned herself around walking down the staircase carefully. As her foot landed on the floor of the living room, her eyes fell on her son sitting in front of the door trying to tie his laces. Stepping forward, she looked over at Clarke who was cuddled up with Olivia between her legs, ten Blu ray’s on the couch in front of them, Olivia’s attention fully on the Blu rays.

 

She was about to offer Oscar her help when she noticed he was successfully tying his laces up. A massive smile covering both her and Oscar’s faces, kneeling down in front of him she glanced at Clarke smiling softly at her before turning her attention back to their son. “You can tie your laces now?” She softly asked as Oscar finished tying her second trainer, looking up at his Mama he softly nodded his head smiling brightly at her. “Who taught you to tie them?”

 

“Mommy did”

 

“Wow that’s awesome”

 

“I’m a big boy now Mama”

 

“Yes you are” Lexa softly smiled standing up she gently placed Oscar’s shirt on the arm of the couch looking down at him and softly saying, “Once you’re happy with your laces, put on your shirt ok?”

 

“Ok Mama”

 

“Good boy” Lexa responded walking over to Clarke and Olivia, noticing Clarke’s attention was fully on her, sitting down on the couch right next to Clarke and Olivia. Softly whispering “Do you know where Oscar’s leather jacket is?” Keeping her voice down not wanting to risk, Oscar hearing her mention the jacket in case he got upset again, “He got really upset upstairs thinking he lost it”

 

“I’m not sure; it might be in the den…he was in there yesterday for a little bit”

 

“I’ll check”

 

“It’s ok I’ll check, I know his new hiding spot” Clarke responded smiling softly at Lexa, before carefully removing herself from behind Olivia, placing her hand on Lexa’s leg to help her keep balance as she stood. Walking towards the den she looked back at Lexa smiling softly at her, Lexa felt almost hypnotised as she looked at Clarke, it was as if a spark had renewed inside her. Her attention was pulled away from Clarke when Olivia asked her a question:

 

“Which princess movie should me and Mommy watch Mama?”

 

Lexa turned her attention to her daughter looking down at the little girl with a smile on her face, looking at the Blu rays laid out in front of her daughter she scanned them, humming softly as she leant forward looking hard at the Bly Ray’s. “I think you should watch…..this one,” She said pointing to the Blu Ray of Sleeping Beauty “But save this one for when Mama comes back” She said pointing to the Blu Ray of Tangled

 

“That’s a good idea Mama….” Looking closer at the Blu Ray Olivia let out a gasp looking up at her Mama, “she looks like Rapunzel Mama”

 

“She does, doesn’t she?”

 

“Yeah”

 

Olivia looked at her Mama smiling before placing all the Blu Ray’s on top of each other; leaving only the two Blu Rays her Mama had just helped her choose, she carefully carried the Blu Rays to the where her Mommy had got them moments before. Walking back over to her Mama, she stepped in between her Mama’s legs resting her head against her chest and wrapping her arms around her. Looking up at her Mama she sweetly asked, “Are you coming back Mama?”

 

“I am coming back, me and Oscar are gonna do some shopping, then when we’re finished we’ll come back and me, you, Oscar and Mommy will have some dinner…which is a surprise so don’t tell Mommy yet ok?” Olivia nodded her head up at her Mama “And once we’ve had dinner, then maybe we can watch a movie…then Mama will have to go home…but I’ll see you at the weekend”

 

“How long is it until the weekend Mama?”

 

“Well today is Wednesday and the weekend is on Saturday…so how many days is that?”

 

Olivia looked down at her hands remembering the days of the week her teachers and her Mommy had taught her, saying the days in her head she counted on her hands before looking up at her Mama “Saturday is in 3 days Mama…is that right?”

 

“Yes it is”

 

“YEAH” Olivia shouted out in excitement as Clarke walked into the living room holding Oscar’s leather jacket in her left hand, walking over she sat on the couch where she had been before. As she sat down Olivia quickly moved back onto the couch sitting between her Mommy’s legs like she had been before. “We see Mama in 3 days Mommy”

 

“I know we do….but she’s staying to help put you to bed tonight so you get extra Mama Time”

 

“Really Mommy?”

 

“Of course, as long as Mama Wants to”

 

“Do you Mama?” Olivia asked looking to her Mama, the hope clearly covering her face as she smiled up at her Mama

 

“I would love to princess” Before Lexa had a chance to say anything, or thank Clarke, Oscar appeared in front of her looking at her sadly “What’s wrong my prince?”

 

“I can’t do the buttons Mama”

 

“Want me to do them for you?”

 

“Yes please Mama” Oscar sweetly responded smiling as Lexa brought her hands up gripping onto either side of the shirt, gently pulling on the shirt Oscar laughed softly as he shuffled closer to his Mama. Laughing at his Mama’s actions, he looked up at her smiling brightly as his laugh softly subsided. Looking down at his Mama’s hands, watching as she did up each button on his shirt. “Can you leave the top two open Mama?”

 

“Of course I can”

 

“Thank you Mama”

 

“I think you should be thanking Mommy more than me”

 

Oscar looked at his Mama confusion filling his face not knowing why he would have to thank his Mommy instead “Why Mama?”

 

“Well look in Mommy’s hand….she found something for you” Lexa responded smiling at her son as she did up the final button of Oscar’s shirt. She watched as Oscar turned his attention to his Mommy, watching as she lifted Oscar’s jacket into the air showing it to the little boy. Lexa watched as the massive smile spread across Oscar’s face and he excitedly moved jumping onto the couch and hugging his Mommy tightly before looking down at the jacket

 

“You found it Mommy,” He shockingly said looking up dough eyed at his Mommy, a smile appearing on his face.

 

“I did…you hid it in the Den baby….I think maybe you hid it too well didn’t you my prince?”

 

“I did Mommy” Oscar laughed his laugh turning into a dirty laugh very quickly as he looked at his Mommy. Clarke gently squeezed Oscar’s cheeks together, not wanting to mess up her son’s hair knowing how much he loved having his hair perfectly done. Handing the jacket to Oscar, Clarke watched as he smiled brightly jumping down from the couch and stopping in front of her Mama holding the jacket between them “Can I wear it Mama? Even though it’s hot outside”

 

“You can if you promise me something?”

 

“Anything Mama”

 

“If you get too hot, you have to take off the jacket or tell Mama”

 

“I promise Mama”

 

“Mmmm…..ok then you can wear it”

 

“YES….Can you wear yours Mama? …so we match”

 

“You wanna match with Mama?”

 

“Yes, I like matching with you Mama”

 

“I like matching with you too” Lexa responded smiling at her son as she leant forward kissing him gently on the cheek, smiling when Oscar grabbed hold of her wrapping his arms around her squeezing her and wriggling excitedly on the spot. Dropping his jacket onto the floor as he hugged her. Lifting Oscar off the ground slightly gently squeezing him back, placing him on the ground she picked up the jacket holding it in the air for him to place on. “Come on time to go shopping” Oscar quickly slipped his arms into the sleeves turning around to face his Mama looking to see where her jacket was “My jacket’s in the car, I’ll put it on when we get to the supermarket” She quickly told her son knowing what he was thinking. She watched as Oscar turned and ran to the door excitedly waiting there for her. “You’re not saying goodbye to Mommy?”

 

“Bye Mommy….Bye Liv” He excitedly let out waving at them, not moving from his spot near the door. The action caused both Lexa and Clarke to laugh slightly, whilst Olivia waved back at her brother.

 

“Is there anything you need?” She asked looking at Clarke, before Clarke could answer Olivia spoke

 

“Sweets Mama, loads of sweets”

 

“I don’t think Mommy would be very happy with me if I got you loads of sweets”

 

“No I wouldn’t” Clarke interjected smiling as Olivia turned looking up at her giggling at her Mommy “Why don’t you ask Mama for something less sugar filled huh?”

 

“Like what Mommy?”

 

“I don’t know baby, what do you like other than sweets?”

 

“I don’t know Mommy”

 

“How about some fruit? ….I’ll tell you what; if you ask Mama for something healthy that you like and then Mama can choose one pack of sweeties for you…how does that sound?”

 

“What is healthy Mommy?”

 

“Fruits are healthy and vegetables”

 

“Are apples healthy Mommy?”

 

“They are”

 

“Can I have loads of apples Mommy?”

 

“Yes you can”

 

“Yay…” Olivia happily let out turning her attention to her Mama “Can you get me some apples please Mama? And a pack of sweeties please”

 

“Of course I can princess” Lexa quickly responded smiling and leaning forward kissing Olivia on the cheek “Look after Mommy for me”

 

“I will Mama”

 

“Good girl….” Lexa smiled at Olivia placing a kiss on her cheek again before her daughter hugged her quickly, releasing the hug she looked to Clarke “Do you want anything?”

 

“Just the coffee thanks; I can do the rest tomorrow”

 

“Ok” Lexa responded leaning forward and kissing Clarke on the cheek, instantly realising what she had done she looked at Clarke, who smiled at her instantly squashing any doubts or fears she had inside. Standing up she walked over to Oscar who was eagerly holding his hand up in the air for his Mama. Taking hold of Oscar’s hand she smiled down at him as he excitedly turned the door handle frowning when the door didn’t open, giggling at her son she reached up with her free hand unlocking the door nodding at Oscar, she watched as he turned the door handle smiling as it opened. Looking back at Clarke and Olivia she softly said, “We won’t be long” looking at the clock noting the time was 13:45 she added, “We should be back about 15:00 hopefully” Clarke smiled at her nodding her head softly at her sentence.

 

“Bye Mama” Olivia excitedly smiled and waved at her Mama as she sat on her Mommy’s lap.

 

“Bye princess” Lexa responded waving back at Olivia, as her and Oscar stepped through the door, closing the door behind her she pulled her car keys out of her pocket, holding onto Oscar’s hand as he went down the stairs of the porch. Walking up to the Black and Dark Red Land Rover/Range Rover Evoque Hatchback 4x4, she unlocked it, smiling as Oscar ran forward stopping at the door waiting for his Mama, stopping next to Oscar, she smiled opening the door for Oscar to climb in, and sure enough, as soon as the door was clear open he jumped up onto the step, using it to push himself up into the booster chair. Sitting in the chair, he moved the seatbelts over him, looking up at his Mama waiting patiently for her to strap him into the seat.

 

Lexa smiled leaning into the chair and buckled up her son into the child seat. Once he was strapped in properly she stood closing the door. Walking to her left and opening the boot, she grabbed her jacket out of the boot. Closing the boot she turned to walk to the driver’s seat, as she did, she noticed Olivia looking out the window waving sweetly at her, she watched as her daughter blew her a kiss, Lexa pretended to catch the kiss stumbling backwards, pretending the kiss had knocked her over, looking back to the window she noticed Olivia’s body was shaking softly as she laughed at her Mama’s actions. Clarke appeared next to their daughter looking at her in amusement before looking at Lexa and smiling at her. Walking around to the driver’s side of the car, opening the door she waved one final time at Olivia, before climbing into the seat looking back at Oscar as she threw her jacket onto the passenger’s seat. Looking back, she noticed Oscar’s attention was on the colour of the seating: “You like the seat colours?”

 

“It’s a new colour Mama”

 

“It is a new colour, its dark red”

 

“It matches the outside Mama”

 

“I know, I got it because red is someone’s favourite colour….I wonder who’s?”

 

“MINE MAMA”

 

Lexa laughed softly at her son reaching backwards and gently tickling his stomach “I know handsome” Oscar laughed again looking at his Mama. “Let’s go then” She added placing her seatbelt on before pressing the ignition button, starting up the car, checking her mirrors and her rear view mirror were correctly positioned, she placed the car in drive pulling out of the driveway of her and Clarke’s house. Placing her radio on she clicked the source button until she found what she was looking for, pressing ok so the music played she laughed as Oscar started dancing to the jungle book soundtrack she placed on. She wasn’t a fan of listening to the soundtrack all the time but it’d been a while since she’d taken Oscar out on his own. Plus if she was honest, some of the songs on the soundtrack were so good she could listen to them all day long. As she kept driving the car, Oscar began singing along with all the songs as they came on. As the soundtrack reached ‘I wanna be like you’, Lexa couldn’t stop herself singing along to the song, she and Oscar sang the whole song together both of the them knowing every single word of the song. As the song came to an end Lexa was just pulling into the supermarket, driving to the front of the car park she parked in one of the many empty spaces, as the last beat of the song played she pressed stop turning the radio off.

 

“Are we there Mama?” Oscar excitedly asked leaning forward slightly knowing the car was no longer moving.

 

“Yes we are”

 

“YAY”

 

Lexa laughed at her son’s enthusiasm at being at the supermarket, he never once failed to be happy to go shopping, even if it was only for the toy section, it was nice to see her son so happy. Turning off the engine, checking in her mirrors to check the car was parked correctly, she removed her seatbelt, opening her door she climbed out, walking around the car to Oscar’s door. Opening it she leant inside unbuckling her son, she helped Oscar climb out of the child seat, until he was out of the car and standing next to her, his hand instantly grabbing hold of hers. Holding onto Oscar’s hand, she stepped back, closing the door shut. As she was about to lock the car, she looked down at Oscar seeing the expectant look on his face, knowing he was waiting for her to get her jacket, not disappointing her son she opened the passengers door she removed her jacket, closing the door once she had retrieved it. Placing the jacket on letting go of Oscar’s hand for a second, before retaking his hand in hers. Looking down at her son, she softly asked “You ready?”

 

“Yes”

 

“Let’s do it then” Lexa responded locking the car before letting her son carefully lead the way to the supermarket entrance.

 

* * *

 

  **Heda Records Studio 13:00**

Raven and Zachary had been in the studio since Lexa had left to check on Clarke and the twins. Raven had managed to finish the track her and Lexa had been working on since the morning. She’d even managed to record the lyrics over the track whilst Zachary had his nap; thankfully, he was a heavy sleeper just like Octavia.  Now she was playing with Zachary on the floor as he giggled along playing with his Bing toys. She’s listened back to the track pleased with how it sounded, she knew it would sound better with Lexa singing but she made due at the moment. After listening to the track, it had given her some inspiration to write a new song, she wasn’t sure, when she’d use it but at least she knew she had a song in her back pocket if needed. Now she managed to do what she and Lex had needed to do today, she was now able to do her favourite thing in the world, sit with her son and play. Her attention was brought to the studio door as it opened, looking up she saw Octavia entering the studio, a smile graced her face as she took in the sight of her wife, a proud smile on her face as she walked up to Raven and Zachary sitting down on the couch in front of them. Leaning forward and down she placed a loving kiss on Raven’s lips softly smiling into it. Raven smiled up at the slightly older brunette. Looking to their son, she went to lean down to kiss her son but was stopped when he suddenly jumped up, jumping onto Raven’s lap holding onto her tightly. Both Octavia and Raven listened as small sobs escaped their son’s mouth, as he held on tightly to his Mama. Octavia and Raven looked worryingly at each other before Octavia softly asked:

 

“What’s wrong baby?”

 

“Stay with Mama”

 

“You wanna stay with Mama?”

 

“Yes” Zachary mumbled into Raven’s shoulder holding onto her even tighter, the sobs coming from him increasing slightly as did the sniffles. “Don’t wanna go”

 

“Hey baby, we’re not going anywhere. I just came to see you and Mama, and now we’re all gonna stay here….together”

 

Octavia watched as her son slowly lifted his head from his Mama’s shoulder, looking at her for confirmation. Raven softly nodded her head at her son, the action seeming to comfort him as he turned around looking up at his Mommy “Together?” He softly asked.

 

“Yes, together” She smiled when Zachary removed himself from his Mama, turning around and walking towards his Mommy, holding his arms in the air for her, lifting Zachary up onto her lap she smiled down at him “Did you think I was taking you away from Mama?” Zachary nodded his head up at his Mommy a sad pout on his face. “Well I would never take you away from Mama…never ever in a million years…I promise”

 

“Ok Mommy”

 

“Ok baby” She softly smiled hugging her son softly before letting him go, as soon as she let him go, he shimmied down her legs until he was on the floor, turning and placing himself back near his toys beginning to play with them. The action made her and Raven both laugh softly, as Raven stood up slightly sitting herself down on the couch next to Octavia. As she looked in Raven’s direction their lips connected quickly, a feeling overpowered Octavia as it always did, the amount of love and passion that she could feel flowing from Raven amazing her. Their lips stayed connected for a minute or so until they finally pulled apart. “What was that for?” Octavia asked looking into Raven’s eyes, seeing that burst of lust she had become used to over the years, but still it made her own passion burst inside her.

 

“No reason, I just wanted to kiss my amazingly talented and beautiful wife”

 

“Why?”

 

“I just wanted to kiss you….We missed you as well” Raven said looking to Zachary who was miles away playing with his Bing toys. “He’d tell you if he was paying attention”

 

“He’s too busy being a Mama’s boy” Octavia jokingly let out laughing softly at her wife’s grin

 

“He just knows who gives him sweets”

 

“That is true….though you better now have given him sweets today”

 

“Not even I would be stupid enough to give a two year old sweets when their confined to a room” Raven honestly responded wrapping her arm around Octavia’s shoulder as she leant backwards, Octavia moving backwards with her as she did so. “Anyways, enough about me and our son….how was your day? How did work go?”

 

“It went really well, I managed to finish all the designs plus a few extra and I called Sinclair and luckily he was in the area, he asked to meet up so we met at Arkadia and had some food and a chat”

 

“And?”

 

“He said the jobs mine; he said that they start filming for the video in a few weeks I think he said the 4th April, but anyway he hired me for the video and for a project afterwards, we’ve still gotta talk over salary but I think he wants to give me more work”

 

“Babe that’s awesome, where is the shoot?”

 

“That’s the great thing, it’s here in Boston, well in Allston but only about a thirty minute drive at max so I’ll be able to come home every night”

 

“That’s awesome news baby…I’m so proud of you”

 

“It wouldn’t be possible without you” Octavia honestly responded leaning forward and lovingly and gently kissing Raven, who looked at her slightly confused “You encouraged me to go back to work, and you’ve been so supportive, I can’t even thank you enough…I don’t think I realised how much I missed it until I went back…”

 

“I know”

 

“I know you did, which is why I’m grateful you’re the best wife I could ask for” Octavia responded leaing in kissing her wife on the lips, pulling back moving until her lips were at Raven’s ear “I’m gonna show you show grateful I am later tonight”

 

“Oh really?” Raven asked pulling back to look Octavia in the eyes, when Octavia nodded her head slightly she leant forward capturing her wife’s lips lovingly. Their lips stayed connected for minutes until Zachary climbed between their bodies forcing them apart, looking at each other they both softly laughed at their son. Looking down at Zachary, Raven softly asked him “What's up baby boy?”

 

“Kisses”

 

“You want kisses as well?” Zachary nodded his head at his Mama, leaning down Raven wrapped her free arm around Zachary before leaning forward more and peppering kisses all over his face making him wriggle slightly. As she pulled back he looked up at h dough eyed

 

“Hungry Mama”

 

“Your hungry as well?”

 

“He is such a mini you” Octavia added amusingly looking at her wife and son.

 

“I know right” Raven laughed looking from Zachary to Octavia “How do you feel about a family day?”

 

“Don't you have work to do?”

 

“That's one of the bonuses of being the boss or one of them at least. Besides we only have three tracks to work on and we’ve done two, and we’ve got more than a week left and that's more than enough time….plus you’re my muse and if I don't see my muse how can I write music”

 

“All valid points I suppose” Octavia smiled brightly leaning forward capturing Raven’s lips in a quick and loving kiss. See Zachary pout at her she leant down kissing her son gently before looking back to Raven “A family day sounds perfect”

  

* * *

 

** In the Supermarket  **

Lexa had managed to keep Oscar away from the Toy section for all of thirty seconds before he had excitedly seen a new Minions toy that was followed by him seeing all the new superhero action figures. Normally she'd have made him move on but seeing him so happy when she’d seen him so sick hours before she decided to let him have fun looking st all the toys he wanted, that was until thirty minutes later when they were still in the toy section. Telling her son it was time to move on she was surprise when there was no arguing from him but a simple ‘Ok Mama’. That was over ten minutes ago and now they were walking through the aisles, Lexa was impressed with her son’s calm behaviour, usually when he was in the supermarket he was overly excited but at the moment he was calm silently clinging onto his Mama’s hand as she pushed the trolley with her other hand. As they walked into the yoghurt and diary aisle, she felt Oscar tugging on her hand gently, looking down at him she softly asked:

 

“What’s wrong my prince?”

 

“Look Mama…yoghurts”

 

“I know baby…why don’t you go pick some”

 

“Really Mama?”

 

“Of course, we can get some stuff so Mommy doesn’t have to worry about shopping tomorrow”

 

“Can I get some for Livia?”

 

“Of course, and some for me as well” She smiled down at her son, watching as the smile spread across his face and he ran the small space across the aisle to the yoghurt section. Lexa watched him thoughtfully looking over the selection of yoghurts; she was brought out of her thoughts when she heard someone calling her name. Looking around she noticed someone she recognised, a smile breaking out onto her face as she took in the sight of the light brown haired girl she knew to be Luna. Taking a step forward she removed her hand from the trolley, watching as Luna picked up pace rushing towards her; as soon as Luna was close enough, they wrapped their arms around each other hugging each other tightly for a nearly a minute, before Lexa pulled back a massive smile on her face as she looked at her old friend, taking in the sight in front of her. “Luna, wow you look amazing”

 

“You can talk Lex….you look amazing”

 

“Thanks…wow…” Is all Lexa could formulate at that moment, shaking her head slightly at how she weird it was to bump into her friend in the supermarket of all places “How long has it been?”

 

“It must have been a least five years…last time I saw you Clarke was pregnant”

 

“Wow, yeah that was a long time ago”

 

“How is Clarke?”

 

“She’s great”

 

“And the kid….wait you had twin’s right?”

 

“Yes we did…Oscar and Olivia, their four years old and perfect in so many ways…Oscar’s over there picking out food”

 

“Just like his Mama then”

 

“Yeah…how are things with you? I heard you and Derrick broke up”

 

“Yeah we did, but we’re trying to work things out for our daughter”

 

“Your daughter?”

 

“Yeah she’s one years old, she’s with Derrick this week, and I’ve got some stuff to do with my mom and dad so I got a week away”

 

“And you can’t wait to go back to her huh?”

 

“So much, I miss her so much”

 

“What’s her name?”

 

“We called her Rebecca...Becca for short”

 

“That’s a beautiful name”

 

“Thanks….Here…” Luna paused as she reached into her pocket pulling out her phone she unlocked it pulling up pictures of her daughter “This is her” She proudly beamed showing Lexa the pictures of her daughter

 

“She is adorable, I remember that stage, when their all mushy and over clingy to you”

 

“It’s amazing right”

 

Before Lexa could respond, Oscar came slowly walking over to her carrying as many yoghurts as he could carry, seeing her son Lexa laughed softly stepping forward taking the yoghurts from her son’s arms, and placing them into the trolley carefully. Noticing the woman talking to his Mama, he suddenly went quiet and looked nervously up at his Mama, his hands shooting to grab the back of her jeans, seeing and feeling the action Lexa looked down at Oscar softly explaining “Oz baby, you don’t need to be scared…this is Luna…she’s Mama’s friend”

 

“Good or bad Mama?”

 

“Luna is a very good friend of mine” Lexa watched as Oscar released her jeans, stepping out and in front of his Mama looking up at Luna he smiled softly reaching his hand up holding it in the air pointing at Luna.

 

“Hi….I’m Oscar” He smiled at her brightly as the woman reached out shaking his hand before releasing it “This is my Mama” He added, his voice filled with pride as he leant his back against his Mama’s legs. He watched as the smile spread across the woman’s face and she laughed softly.

 

“It’s lovely to meet you Oscar I’m Luna, and I know that’s your Mama because I can tell”

 

“You can?”

 

“I can”

 

“How?”

 

“Well between you and me….” Oscar nodded his head confirming it would be their secret “You look just like your Mama when she was younger” Luna smiled when Oscar let out a massive gasp looking up at his Mama in amazement before looking back to Luna. “Your hair is the same colour as well, but your Mama’s hair got darker when she got older”

 

“Will my hair get darker Mama?” Oscar asked looking up at his Mama

 

“It might baby, but it hasn’t changed since you were born”

 

“I like it like this Mama”

 

“I know you do baby, so do I” She responded running her hand over Oscar’s hair gently, leaning down she kissed him gently on the forehead “So what yoghurts did you get me huh?”

 

“I got your favourite chocolate ones Mama,” He explained moving around to the side of the trolley, pointing to the Muller Light chocolate mousse he had picked up, then pointing to the Dannon Danimals and Muller little stars yoghurts he said, “I got mine and Olivia’s favourites too”. Before pointing to the Muller Light Cherry yoghurts he had picked up “And I got Mommy’s favourite”

 

“You’re a thoughtful little boy aren’t you?” Lexa beamed at him, smiling when he giggled and nodded his head

 

“How is Clarke?” Luna asked hearing Oscar talking about his Mommy, as Lexa turned to face her smiling at the mention of the name

 

“She’s doing great”

 

“Is she back in work yet?”

 

“Yeah she has been for a while, but we agreed she would work from home. She still designs and paints, and runs the studio but she just isn’t there all the time.”

 

“That’s good, let’s just hope they don’t get her Blonde hair huh”

 

Lexa and Luna both laughed softly at the comment, both knowing that Luna had a distain for Blonde hair, due ironically to Clarke’s ex Niylah and an incident that took place between Niylah and Lexa. Luna had always joked that Clarke was the only blonde in the world she would ever like, and that she only liked her because she pretended Clarke wasn’t Blonde. Hearing the comment Oscar looking up at the two women loudly saying:

 

“I like Mommy’s hair”

 

“I know baby, Luna was just joking”

 

“Mommy’s hair is nicer than Luna’s,” He added looking angrily up at the women, unaware that his Mama was slightly impressed that he had remembered Luna’s name.

 

“Oz, listen to me” Lexa began kneeling down so she was level with her son, who looked at her pouting at the mean words Luna had said about his Mommy’s hair. “Luna was just kidding, see when we were younger someone hurt Mama because I loved Mommy, and Luna doesn’t like that person very much, and that person has Blonde hair kind of like Mommy’s. So Luna doesn’t like that hair anymore”

 

“I love Mommy’s hair”

 

“I know and so do I….and so does Luna, but she pretends she doesn’t…right Luna?” She explained looking back at Luna for confirmation.

 

“Right…I love your Mommy…she is one of my most favourite people in the whole world” Moving forward she knelt down next to Lexa looking at Oscar she added “I’m sorry if I upset you, I was just being silly”

 

“It’s ok,” Oscar quickly said surprising Lexa and Luna he stepped forward hugging the woman he had met minutes before hand “Mama is silly sometimes”

 

“Oh am I mister?” Lexa asked raising her eyebrow, before she could move or say anything else to her son, she felt her phone vibrating in her pocket, pulling it out of her pocket she saw Clarke’s picture on the screen, swiping to the right she answered the call, looking at her son smiling at him “You just got saved Mister…..Hey Clarke”

 

“Hey Lex, sorry I know Oscar’s probably going crazy”

 

“Actually he’s not, He oddly calm”

 

“That’s weird”

 

“You’re telling me….anyways, what can I do for you?”

 

“Olivia was wondering if you could buy her some popcorn for later”

 

“What kind?”

 

“Mixed, Sweet and Salty”

 

“Ok…..was Olivia wondering or were you wondering Clarke?”

 

“Damn it, you know me too well”

 

“Let me guess, Olivia fell asleep so you were left watching the film on your own, then you got hungry and found you had no popcorn left”

 

“How do you do that Lex?”

 

“I’m very gifted”

 

“You checked all the cupboards didn’t you?”

 

“Maybe…..so apart from popcorn is there anything else you need?”

 

“No, just you and Oscar to come home”

 

“Ok then, I’ll chat to you later…I’ve got something to tell you actually”

 

“Oh ok”

 

“It can wait though…I’ll see you soon Clarke”

 

“See you soon Lex, bye”

 

“Bye” With that Lexa hung up the phone, placing it back into her pocket she looked over at Oscar, watching as he came running over to her jumping onto her chest “You ready to finish this shopping?” Oscar nodded his head, looking to Luna she softly asked “You joining us?”

 

“Sure why not…we’re both her to shop…and gives us time to catch up”

 

“Indeed…let’s do it” Lexa responded standing up, holding Oscar to her chest as she pushed the trolley with her free hand, smiling as her and Luna fell into conversation as they walked out of the current aisle they were in, heading into the next one, talking away about what they had missed in each other’s lives over the years.

 

* * *

** Wood’s House **

Clarke had just finished making herself a coffee with the remainder of her coffee, she was beyond thankful that Lexa was getting her more, she was fine with the long days filled with mostly chaos but she couldn’t do it without coffee. It was the one thing she needed to drink during the day to help her keep going. As she walked into the living room, she noticed Olivia sitting up on the couch, rubbing her eyes gently as she looked around her mommy. As soon as her eyes landed on Clarke, a massive smile graced her face, waving softly at her Mommy as she got up from the couch and walked over to her. Kneeling down Clarke carefully placed her coffee on one of the coasters on the table, opening her arms as her daughter reached her wrapping her arms around her tightly.

 

“Hey princess, did you have a good nap?”

 

Olivia nodded her head softly before speaking “Sorry I feel asleep Mommy”

 

“It’s ok baby, we can watch the film again…you don’t need to be sorry, ok?”

 

“Ok, mommy”

 

“Are you feeling better? Or are you still a little sick?”

 

“I feel better Mommy, the medicine worked”

 

“That’s so good baby” Looking down at Olivia she noticed her princess was a little pale, she knew exactly what that meant, she needed sugar to replace all the food and drink her body had forced out in the morning “Do you want a juice?” When Olivia shook her head, Clarke thought about other drinks her daughter could have “What about a hot chocolate?”

 

“Can I have loads of milk?”

 

“So you can drink it straight away?”

 

“Yes please mommy”

 

“Well seeing as you asked so nicely, of course”

 

Clarke smiled standing up lifting Olivia with her, smiling as the little girl gripped onto her resting her head on her shoulder, her hands gripping onto her shirt. Clarke carried Olivia into the kitchen, holding her daughter carefully to her chest whilst she made the Hot Chocolate, five minutes later and she’d finished making Olivia’s hot chocolate carrying the drink and her daughter carefully back into the living room. She’d already warned Olivia about letting the drink cool down before drinking it, placing the drink on the table next to her coffee, she carried Olivia over to the couch pausing as she heard the doorbell ring, turning her attention to the door she continued with her motion placing Olivia on the couch “I’ll be two seconds princess”. Olivia smiled up at her, her attention turning to the screen, turning and walking to the door Clarke reached for the door handle suddenly a rush of fear filled her and she retracted her hand, deciding to look through the peephole instead. As she did, she felt her breath hitch and her whole body freeze in fear as she took in the sight of Roan.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone has any questions please feel free to contact me or ask a question in a comment and I'll get back to you :-)


	14. Sleeping Beauty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke kicks into Mama Bear mode....

** Chapter 14-Sleeping Beauty **

Clarke froze on the spot she couldn’t move, she tried forcing herself into action but the only thing she could think of was Roan hurting Olivia in some way. Trying to ignore the fear inside her, it instantly rose inside her as Roan began banging on the door shouting her name as he banged, physically shaking the door against her hand. Closing her eyes, she felt a sudden surge rush through her, an urge to protect her daughter from harm. Looking over to Olivia, she noticed her daughter’s face was covered in complete fear, rushing over to Olivia, she knelt down in front of her, Olivia lunged forward wrapping her arms around her Mommy.

 

“It’s gonna be ok princess…Mommy’s got you” She soothed lifting Olivia off of the couch, feeling Olivia fearfully gripped onto her she kept herself as calm as possible, knowing that if Olivia could tell or sense she was scared herself that it would make the little girl more scared than she already was. Holding onto Olivia tightly she leant down and picked up the Hot Chocolate she had made for her daughter, carrying Olivia with her into the den, opening and closing the door, she walked into the den thankful that as soon as the door closed Roan’s banging became muffled, making it harder for Olivia and herself to hear the knocks. Once the door was closed, she carried Olivia with her around the room until she found the spare key that was in the room. Placing the Hot Chocolate on the desk, she found the spare key hidden in one of the top drawers of Lexa’s desk, she walked over to door locking it before returning to the desk, sitting down in the chair she felt Olivia still holding onto her tightly. Leaning back in the chair, she carefully made some space between them she smiled at her daughter:

 

“See all gone everything is ok”

 

“Are we safe Mommy?”

 

“You’re always safe; as long as Mommy is here...you’ll always be safe”

 

“Are you safe Mommy?”

 

“Mommy is safe”

 

“Promise?”

 

“I promise” Clarke responded knowing lying to her daughter wasn’t a great idea, but she also knew that being honest with Olivia right now wasn’t an option. She couldn’t admit that she wasn’t sure they were safe, she couldn’t explain to Olivia that she wasn’t sure what Roan was capable of or what he was going to do. Those were things that a four-year old wouldn’t be able to understand. Looking around she tried to find something to distract Olivia from Roan being outside. Seeing the notepad from earlier on top of the desk she looked around for the pen not seeing it, seeing a pen in Lexa’s stationary organiser she picked up a pencil, looking down at Olivia she softly asked, “You wanna see Mommy draw something?” Olivia softly nodded her head looking up at her Mommy “What should I draw?” Olivia shrugged her shoulders at the question “Anything in the whole world you want”

 

“Can you draw Mama?”

 

“Oooooooo…that’s a difficult one but I think I can do it just for my princess”

 

“Can I watch Mommy?”

 

“Of course you can….that’s the whole point, and you can drink your Hot Chocolate whilst you watch me”

 

“Yay” Clarke smiled at her daughter brining the cup of Hot Chocolate closer to her daughter, making it easier for Oliva to reach, she was about to start drawing when Olivia let out another gasp before pointing to something in front of her “Draw that picture Mommy”

 

Clarke turned her attention in the direction that her daughter was pointing in; her eyes instantly fell on a picture of their wedding day it was of her and Lexa at their reception. Lexa was wearing her simply cut straight lined white dress the dress loosened around Lexa’s legs, she was sat next to Lexa her legs resting on Lexa’s lap whilst the two women were in deep conversation. Clarke’s dress was a traditional pure white Princess type dress, simple at the top covered in lace along the arms and neckline, the lace running down the front and back splitting and darting off into different directions rushing down the dress until it reached the bottom of the dress. Clarke’s white high heel shoes were clear in the picture, due to her legs positioning on Lexa’s legs. She remembered that exact moment; not because it was caught on camera but because she remembered Lexa pulling her to sit down after noticing she was in slight pain, Lexa went on to remind her that she shouldn’t have worn heels all day. She remembered them sitting there for a while, talking about things that were to come for them, she remembered Lexa removing her heels and gently rubbing her feet to sooth the pain. The more she looked at the picture the more memories rushed forward, before she could latch on to any of them she felt Olivia tapping on her hand, the action brought Clarke out of her thoughts looking down at her daughter she smiled at Olivia as her daughter spoke:

 

“When was that Mommy?”

 

“When was the picture taken?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy’s question “It was taken on mine and Mama’s wedding day”

 

“What’s a wedding day?”

 

“It’s a day when two people who really love each other and want to spend the rest of their lives together. They bring all their families together and they stand in front of them all and tell each other how much they love each other, and that they wanna spend the rest of their lives together, then they give each other a ring that represents their endless love.”

 

“What’s a ring?”

 

“A ring is a piece of gold or some kind of metal that is shaped into a circle and the circle means no end and no beginning”

 

“Where’s your ring Mommy?”

 

“It’s here baby,” She said moving her left arm a little closer to Olivia, bringing her hand in the air to show her. She watched as Olivia moved her hands to grip onto her left hand. She watched as Olivia ran her fingers over her Mommy’s wedding ring, she couldn’t see Olivia’s face but she knew the little girls face was contorted with pure concentration. She could feel Olivia’s fingers running over the finger that her wedding ring was placed on. Olivia’s fingers stopped moving as she turned around and looked up at her Mommy:

 

“Mommy, what’s this mean?”

 

“What does what mean baby?”

 

“It has numbers and L, what does it mean Mommy?”

 

“The numbers are the date me and Mama got married…and the letter is the first letter of Mama’s name”

 

“Ok….when did you get married Mommy?”

 

“Me and Mama got married on 2nd September 2011, but we had the numbers rearranged”

 

“Why?”

 

“Well because Mama has something called Dyscalculia”

 

“What is it?”

 

“Dyscalculia means that Mama struggles with numbers and understanding numbers sometimes, and that’s why Mama wears those special glasses when she reads numbers”

 

“Their red Mommy”

 

“I know they are princess, but that’s why we rearranged the numbers, to make it easier for Mama to read the numbers”

 

“Ok Mommy” Olivia sweetly responded looking back to her Mommy’s hand, which she was still holding onto with both hands, she began running her finger over the engraving of the ring “I like it Mommy, It’s really pretty”

 

Leaning forward a little Clarke placed a small kiss on the side of Olivia’s head, letting her daughter continue to play with the ring on her finger. Watching Olivia for a second, her attention went back to the pencil in her left hand, wanting to distract herself from the possibility of Roan breaking into the house or being violent to her in front of Olivia. Looking down at the notepad in front of her, she began to sketch out the picture her daughter had asked her too, hoping it would take her mind off Roan and the danger that might be ahead. Drawing the picture worked as she hoped as she became fixated on the drawing, knowing her daughter was still there and safe from the feeling of her continuing to play with her wedding ring.

 

Clarke wasn’t sure how long she’d been drawing when she was pulled away from her drawing when she heard someone trying to open the door to the de. As the panic rose inside her instantly again, she felt her breathing sharpen slightly looking down at Olivia who hadn’t heard the rattling of the door her attention still on her Mommy’s wedding ring. All the options of thing she could do, and whether or not she could run, all raced through her mind. She was about to shout out to Roan, to tell him to leave her and Olivia alone, before she could get the words out she heard a voice shout her name:

 

“Clarke….are you in there?” She instantly recognised the voice as Lexa’s, just the sound of her wife’s voice sent a rush of relief travel through her body, the instant feeling of being safe filling up her body as she realised that Roan must have gone, and if not Lexa would have taken care of him before calling out for her. Standing up, she held onto Olivia carefully placing her onto the ground watching as she rushed over to the door eager to see her Mama. Grabbing the key, she walked over to the door as quick as she could placing the key in the door, unlocking the doors then opening them wide, seeing Lexa standing in front of the door.

 

“Where’s Oscar? Is he safe?” She asked before she lunged forward wrapping her arms around Lexa and holding onto her tightly. Lexa instantly wrapped her arms around Clarke holding onto her tightly, sensing the fear and worry in the blonde.

 

“Oscar’s fine Clarke…he’s in the kitchen” Pulling herself back slightly so she could look at Clarke’s face “What’s wrong? What happened?”

 

“The bad man was here Mama” Olivia interjected squeezing between her Mama and Mommy, who let her squeeze in between them by stepping back a little, facing her Mama she wrapped her arms around her legs squeezing them tightly “But it’s ok Mama, Mommy protected me…and now he’s gone” Olivia happily beamed up still hugging her Mama’s legs.

 

“Of course Mommy protected you…that’s what Mommy does” She softly replied looking at her daughter, not saying what was on her mind, not wanting to worry or unsettle her daughter. “Why don’t you go into the kitchen princess….Oscar has something to show you”

 

“Ok Mama” Olivia instantly responded releasing her hold on her Mama’s legs, turning and happily skipping towards the kitchen to find her brother.

 

Once she was sure that Olivia was in the kitchen with Oscar, she looked at Clarke looking into her eyes seeing that pang of fear still there. She carefully placed her hand on Clarke’s arm, pulling her gently into the den pushing her to the side so they were hidden by the sidewall that the doors slide into. Holding onto Clarke’s hands, she looked into her eyes softly asking, “Clarke, what happened? Why was Roan here?”

 

“I don’t know why he was here Lex….I just made Olivia her Hot Chocolate, and then he was banging on the door calling out my name”

 

“He didn’t force himself in, did he?”

 

“No…well I don’t think so. Olivia was scared by the banging so I picked her up and brought her in here, I locked the door and kept her occupied, I don’t know how long ago that was, I thought you were him”

 

“Well I’m not….and he isn’t here, I looked around the whole house for you and there was no sign of anyone else”

 

“Are you sure Lex?”

 

“I’m sure Clarke, but if you want I can do another check,” Lexa suggested moving to turn around and leave the room. Before she could take even a step Clarke pulled on their still connected hands, keeping Lexa in place looking into her eyes.

 

“No stay here please”

 

Sensing the fear in Clarke’s voice, Lexa wrapped her arms around Clarke holding onto her, feeling Clarke’s arms wrap around her and her hands grip onto her shirt. Gently rubbing her hand up and down Clarke’s back “It’s ok Clarke, there’s nobody here” Lexa didn’t say another word, she didn’t need to, her words had a calming effect on Clarke as she felt the blonde relax in her arms slightly. She let Clarke hold onto her a little longer not wanting to rush the blonde.

 

Ten minutes later, Lexa slowly released her hold on Clarke looking down at her and softly asking, “Feel better?” Clarke looked up at her nodding her head softly, smiling at the blonde she removed her arms from around Clarke looking into her eyes; she moved her hand down taking Clarke’s left hand in her right hand. “Come on, I know what will make you feel better…Oscar has a surprise for you” Clarke smiled at the words letting Lexa pull her in the direction of the kitchen, as she entered Lexa stopped her, peaking into the room she softly spoke “Oscar, have you got Mommy’s present ready?”

 

“Yes Mama” Smiling at Clarke, she pulled on Clarke’s hand until they were inside the kitchen, motioning with her hand to the table. Clarke’s eyes landed on Oscar and Olivia sweetly standing at the table their hands placed behind their backs as massive smiles filled their faces. Seeing something hidden behind Oscar’s back she raised her eyebrows, seeing Lexa nodding at their son and daughter in the corner of her eye. She watched as Oscar removed something from behind his back, a massive smile broke onto her face, when Oscar moved a bouquet of different coloured roses, walking forward he held the bouquet in front of Clarke “This is for you Mommy”

 

“Really?” Clarke asked getting an instant nod from Oscar, a massive smile spread across her face as she leant forward taking the roses from her son “What’s this for?” She asked looking to Lexa, who just nodded towards Oscar signalling it was all Oscar’s work. Kneeling down in front of Oscar, she smiled at her son, gently tugging at her son’s leather jacket “What did Mommy do to deserve these?”

 

“I got them because I love you lots and loads Mommy”

 

“You got me flowers because you love me, lots and loads?”

 

“Yeah, and as a present, for being an awesome Mommy”

 

“Thank you my awesome prince I love them…now come here” Clarke responded opening her arms wide for her son, who quickly moved forward wrapping his arms around her hugging her tightly. After a few seconds Clarke pulled back looking at her son “Did you have fun at the supermarket?”

 

“Yeah….me and Mama did loads of shopping, and we got loads of yoghurts”

 

“Oh you did huh?” Clarke asked turning and looking up at Lexa, raising her eyebrows at her.

 

“Hang on, we didn’t get loads of yoghurts, we got like 3 each for us and the twin’s got a pack each”

 

“Ok then, that’s fine” Standing up she looked over at the island counter noticing the two brown bags on top of it she looked at Lexa softly saying “At least it’s only two bags…” Hearing Oscar laugh seeing him looking at his Mama, she looked to Lexa seeing the ‘UT oh’ look on her face, raising her eyebrow she looked at Lexa firmly asking “What is that look for?”

 

“Um, so there may be like one or two more bags in the car”

 

“There may?”

 

“Ok there is, maybe one or two more bags in the car”

 

“How many more? Is it one or two?”

 

“I can’t remember”

 

“Lexa…don’t make me ask our little prince…because you know he won’t lie to me”

 

Lexa released a massive mix of a sigh and a breath, looking to Oscar who smiled brightly at her, knowing he wouldn’t lie to his Mommy. She took a breath before holding her hands in the air looking at Clarke “Ok, so maybe it’s more like four bags”

 

“Four?” Clarke let out looking at Lexa unimpressed “Why four Lexa? I just needed some coffee and tea”

 

“And popcorn”

 

“Don’t be smart”

 

“Ok, I’m sorry…” Lexa started moving forward she stopped in front of Clarke, looking into Clarke’s eyes giving her a soft smile as she did so. “I just noticed that you needed a few things, and I thought that if I did the shop for you it’d take the ease off of you a little, then you wouldn’t have to worry about going out tomorrow, especially if the twins’ are still sick.”

 

“You didn’t need to do that Lex”

 

“I know I didn’t but I wanted to”

 

Clarke couldn’t help but smile at Lexa, leaning forward she hugged her wife holding onto her and whispering into her ear “Your making it really hard to not kiss you in front of the kids” As she pulled back she noticed the smile on Lexa’s face, smiling herself she genuinely added “Thank you”

 

“Your welcome…it was nothing”

 

“It wasn’t nothing, you didn’t have to and I really appreciate it”

 

“Well, you can pay me back by letting me have some of your popcorn”

 

“Wow there Lex, you brought shopping you didn’t save the world”

 

“You’re so mean….it’s a good thing me and Oscar got our own popcorn right Oz?”

 

“YES” Oscar excitedly shouting running over to his Mama stopping in front of her “Can I pick a movie Mama?”

 

“Olivia’s already chosen one….but afterwards you can pick a movie to watch with dinner if you want?”

 

“Can I pick it now Mama?”

 

“If you want to”

 

“YES…Thank you Mama”

 

“Your welcome” Lexa responded watching as Oscar excitedly clapped before turning around and running out of the kitchen until he reached the living room. Looking to Olivia, she noticed her daughter standing a little oddly, “What’s wrong Liv?”

 

“I need the toilet Mama”

 

“Why don’t you go princess?”

 

“Don’t want you to leave”

 

“I’m not going anywhere, I have to leave after you go to bed but not until then” Moving forward she leant down a little so she was face to face with her daughter “So you can go to the toilet, ok?”

 

“Ok Mama” Olivia went to walk out of the kitchen but stopped turning back to her Mama “Can you look after my yoghurts?”

 

“And make sure Mommy doesn’t eat them all?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“I’ll look after them, Mommy won’t get near them.”

 

“Thank you Mama”

 

“You better run to the toilet Missy, before I eat them all,” Clarke added making Olivia laugh, she turned and ran out of the kitchen, Lexa and Clarke both heard Olivia’s giggle fade away as she climbed the stairs. Looking at Lexa, Clarke smiled turning and beginning to unload the shopping that Lexa had brought.

 

“I’m gonna go get the other bags”

 

“Do you need a hand?”

 

“Actually yeah, there’s four bags and I only have two hands”

 

“That you do Lexa” Clarke smirked before taking hold of Lexa’s hand pulling her towards the door, as they walked into the living room they both smiled noticing Oscar sitting on the couch watching Sleeping Beauty, his attention solely on the movie in front of him. Both of them laughed softly as Clarke reached the front door, opening it ignoring the pang of fear inside herself, Clarke turned the handle opening the door pulling Lexa through it, knowing neither of the twins would walk out of the door. Stopping at the boot door, she waited for Lexa to unlock it, which she quickly did, she smiled as Lexa reached in front of her with her free hand opening the boot, revealing six bags of shopping, turning back she smirked at Lexa asking “Four bags huh?”

 

“Four are for you…and the two at the back are mine for my apartment”

 

“That’s ok then”

 

“Sure it is” Lexa responded poking Clarke in the side softly making Clarke squirm under her hand slightly, turning around she sent Lexa a firm look. “Oh I forgot you don’t like being tickled or poked…my bad” Lexa stated removing her hand from Clarke’s holding her hands in the air, smirking brightly at Clarke.

 

“Just grab the bags Lexa”

 

“I love it when you’re bossy”

 

Clarke couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face as she pushed Lexa softly in the stomach, turning around she grabbed two bags holding them to her chest before turning and walking to carry them into the house. Looking back and smirking at Lexa, as Lexa picked up the other two bags closing the button, something made easier with the button of the boot. Laughing softly at Clarke’s actions, she walked back to the house locking the car as she did so. Once she was inside, she closed the front door locking it behind her before carrying the bags into the kitchen placing them on the counter next to the one’s Clarke had just brought in. As she looked at Clarke, noticing that Clarke was now unpacking the bags. Beginning to unload her bags, she looked over at Clarke softly saying:

 

“I got some chicken and a fajita kit; I thought I could make you and the twin’s dinner, if you don’t mind”

 

“That’d be great Lex”

 

“Great”

 

Before either of them could think of anything to say to the other, Oscar came running into the kitchen stopping in between them both, looking to the fridge he turned to his Mama, “Can I have a drink Mama?” Laughing and walking forward Lexa carefully placed her hand on her son’s head walking past him

 

“What would you like my prince?”

 

“Can I have the drink the pretty lady picked for me?”

 

“Your milkshake?”

 

“Yes please Mama”

 

“Ok then.” Lexa responded walking back over to the bags finding the one that contained her son’s milkshake, lifting it out of the bag she shook it slightly before opening it for her son, handing the bottle and the cap to him, she smiled when he took a sip and let out a satisfied ‘Ah’

 

“Thank you Mama”

 

“Your welcome baby boy” Without another word Oscar turned around, happily and carefully walking into the living room. Smiling as she watched her son disappear out of her sight. Turning back to the shopping she noticed Clarke was standing at one of the bags, absentmindedly looking through the bag. She realised quickly that Clarke must have heard Oscar mention a pretty lady, walking over to Clarke she stopped behind her placing either of her hands on the island on either side of Clarke, moving forward slightly so her chest was pressed slightly to Clarke’s back, moving until her lips were near Clarke’s ear, she softly said, “The pretty lady Oscar mentioned was Luna”.

 

“I’m sorry Lex” Was all Clarke could manage as she let her head lean back resting her head against Lexa’s shoulder “I don’t know what’s wrong with me”

 

“It’s ok Clarke; just remember we agreed to talk about things”

 

“No it's not…..I promised I'd talk to you and I want to, it's just this really feels like it's too good to be true”

 

“Clarke...” Lexa softly said, using her hands she carefully turned Clarke around to face her. Looking into Clarke’s eyes she softly continued “It’s gonna take time for this to feel normal, and for you to trust yourself. But you have to start trusting me to deal with whatever you tell me. Even if you think, I’ll get upset and angry about it. Give yourself time Clarke and don’t be so hard on yourself. This is still fresh like four hours ago fresh, so I’m begging you to give yourself a break”

 

“Ok I’ll try”

 

“Clarke, do I have to get on my knees?” Lexa smiled raising her eyebrow at Clarke, when Clarke didn’t respond to her verbally she continued, “Ok, you leave me no choice” As Lexa finished speaking, she slowly began to lower herself onto the floor, before her knee could touch the floor, Clarke pulled her:

 

“Ok I get it….I’ll give myself a break…just don’t kneel on the floor ok”

 

“You promise?”

 

“I promise Lexa”

 

“And you’ll talk to me if you’re feeling worried about anything at all?”

 

“I will”

 

“Good, you better keep this promise because my knees are too precious to be kneeling on the floor, begging you to forgive yourself”

 

“They are nice knees”

 

“They are Clarke, and they don’t need to be damaged”

 

“Well I will make sure I keep my promise then”

 

“Thank you” Lexa smirked looking at Clarke as a natural smile formed on the blonde’s face, leaning forward she placed a gentle and loving kiss on Clarke’s cheek, Clarke instantly moved her hands to rest on Lexa’s lower neck, as Lexa pulled back they looked into each other’s eyes. Before either of them could say anything, they heard footsteps coming towards them. Breaking apart and going back to putting the shopping away, exchanging a smirk and a flirty look as they did so. Within seconds of them breaking apart, Olivia came powdering into the room, running around the island until she was in front of her Mama “Hey Princess”

 

“Did you save my yoghurts Mama?”

 

“Of course, they are safely in the fridge”

 

“Thank you Mama”

 

“Your welcome princess….” Looking down at Olivia, she smiled when her daughter held her arms in the air, leaning down Lexa lifted the little girl into the air, carefully placing Olivia on the counter she smiled more when Olivia leant forward hugging her tightly “You wanna help me unpack?” Olivia nodded her head against her chest, wrapping her arms around Olivia she leant down placing a kiss on her forehead, looking over at Clarke both of them smiling at how clingy their daughter was. At the same time they both knew Olivia was always like this when she was sick, looking down at Olivia Lexa softly asked, “Are you feeling sick princess?” Olivia nodded her head again; looking to Clarke, she asked, “When did we give her, her medicine?”

 

“About two hours ago I think, maybe three”

 

“So we definitely can’t give her more”

 

“No we can’t, maybe some juice, that always makes her feel better”

 

“Yeah maybe” Looking back down at Olivia, Lexa softly asked her “Would you like some juice princess?” Olivia shook her head “How about a Hot Chocolate?” Olivia nodded her head softly

 

“She’s got one in the den, I’ll see if it’s still drinkable”

 

“Ok…” Lexa softly responded not taking her eyes off of Olivia “Mommy’s gonna get your other hot chocolate baby” Lexa soothingly began rubbing circles on Olivia’s back, she continued to do so until a minute or so passed and Clarke returned to the room, looking up at Clarke she softly smiled asking “Is it drinkable?”

 

“No because it’s all gone” Clarke responded walking past the sink, placing the item in the sink as she did so, walking over to Lexa and Olivia she naturally placed her hand on Lexa’s lower back, leaning into the daughter a little more “Olivia, did you drink all the chocolate at once?” Olivia shook her head turning her head to look at her Mommy “Did you drink more than half of it at once?” Clarke noticed the look of slight fear on her daughters face, quickly she added, “You’re not in trouble baby, I just need to know so I can make you feel better”

 

“I drank half Mommy”

 

“Ok, thank you for telling me princess” Looking to Lexa she softly said, “I think she just took in too much sugar at once…I’ll get her some water, that should make her feel better”

 

Lexa smiled at her wife before looking down at their daughter “See princess, Mommy to the rescue again” Lexa felt Olivia laughing against her chest, her small hands gripping onto her Mama’s top. Laughing softly, Lexa turned to see Clarke returning with a glass of water, placing it on the counter she smiled at Lexa before turning and returning to unpacking the bags knowing that Lexa could handle this situation. Looking down at Olivia, Lexa picked up the glass, carefully making some space between her and Olivia she brought the glass to her daughter’s mouth, she smiled as Olivia brought one of her hands to the glass, holding onto the glass as she began drinking the contents of the glass. Lexa watched as Olivia drank half of the glass before pushing it back with her hand, placing the glass on the counter Lexa looked down at Olivia and asked “Better?” Olivia nodded her head “You need anything else princess?”

 

“Just you Mama”

 

“Ok then” Lexa responded trying to let the emotion seep into her voice at her daughters extremely sweet words. Looking to her right she noticed Clarke looking at her with an emotional smile on her face, obviously trying to hide her own emotions at Olivia’s words. Taking a deep breath in she looked back to Olivia, lifting her from on the counter onto her chest. “Let’s unpack shall we?” Olivia nodded her head softly before resting her head on Lexa’s shoulder. Holding Olivia to her chest, she began carefully unpacking the rest of the bags.

 

Clarke and Lexa continued to pack away the shopping until all the bags were empty. Once they were done they both walked into the living room just as Sleeping Beauty was finishing, as they entered the room they came across Oscar sitting up on the couch holding the remote in his hand, his milkshake placed safely between his legs with the cap on. A look of pure frustration on his face as he pressed buttons on the remote, trying to get it to do something. As Lexa carried Olivia into the living room, Clarke moved forward sitting down, as she sat down her son looked up at her:

 

“Can you play it again Mommy?”

 

“Again, you already watched baby, why don’t we watch something else?”

 

“I wanna watch this Mommy, I like it….the princess is like you Mommy”

 

“You think I’m a princess?”

 

“Yes, the bestest prettiest princess ever Mommy” Oscar started dropping the remote on the couch before carefully handing his Mommy his milkshake bottle, shuffling onto his knees she sat up straight on them, looking at his Mommy as her right hand came up to gentle stroke the side of his head “Can we watch it please Mommy?”

 

“How about we watch it later…because Olivia choose a film for us to watch now, but afterwards we can watch this one again…is that ok?”

 

Oscar paused for a second his hand coming to gently rub his chin, after a second or two he shuffled closer to his Mommy placing one hand on her shoulder and the other on her face, his finger gently stroking up and down Clarke’s cheek much to her and Lexa’s amusement. “Can I have Mommy cuddles and Popcorn when we watch it Mommy?”

 

“Mmmm I don’t know….Mommy cuddles AND Popcorn…” Clarke exaggerated making Oscar laugh softly at her “Ok, you can have Mommy cuddles, but you can only have Popcorn if you eat all your dinner ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy” He let out happily before lowering himself back to the couch shuffling to sit against the pillow excitedly kicking his feet a few times, as he looked over at his sister “Are you ok Livi?”

 

When Olivia didn’t answer but instead snuggled closer into her Mama’s chest, looking over at Oscar Lexa softly explained “Olivia isn’t feeling really well, but she’ll be ok soon. But she still wants to watch the film, don’t you Liv?” Olivia nodded her head at the question “See, she loves watching movies right Liv?” Olivia again nodded her head “See Oz Movie time….come on Mommy put the film on”

 

“Yeah Mommy” Oscar added letting out a massive giggle as he looked up at his Mommy, Clarke looked at him raising his eyebrows, sending Lexa an ‘oh really’ look getting a small smile and laugh in return. Leaning down Clarke tickled her son softly after a few minutes she stopped sitting up straight for a second looking down at Oscar as he giggled, bringing his wriggles to a stop, looking up at her he smiled innocently up at her. Looking away for a second Clarke quickly looked back leaning down holding her son gently down, quickly peppering kisses all over Oscar’s face causing a dirty laugh to erupt from his chest.

 

Finally stopping her attack, she lifted her head up smiling as Oscar sat up and hugged her tightly, wrapping her left arm around Oscar she looked down at him “Should I put on this movie?” Oscar nodded his head at the question “Ok, you have to let me go for thirty seconds ok?” Oscar nodded his head releasing his hold on his Mommy before beginning a verbal countdown making Lexa and Clarke laugh softly. Crawling forward on the couch Clarke removed the Sleeping Beauty disc before placing the Tangled disc in to the player closing it and moving back to her spot next to Oscar. Shuffling further back on the couch bringing her feet onto the end of the couch, leaning forward she picked Oscar up lifting him backwards and onto her lap, wrapping her arms around him as she picked up the remote kissing Oscar’s cheek before she pressed play.

 

Clarke smiled over at Lexa, as Olivia turned around on Lexa’s lap so she could see the TV, as Olivia’s back rested against her Mama’s chest, she instantly turned herself to the side, resting her side against her Mama’s chest, her hands curving around her own body, gripping onto her Mama’s t-shirt as she rested her head against her Mama’s shoulder. Bringing her hand up Lexa carefully and soothingly rubbed her hand through her daughter’s hair, her attention turning to the movie as it began to play on the screen. The movie played on and soon enough it had finished, to Clarke and Lexa’s surprise, the twin’s didn’t move an inch from the beginning of the movie until the end. They didn’t fidget or need the toilet or even fall asleep, instead their attention was fully fixed on the film on the screen taking in every single movement and scene as it played out. Once the credits had finished rolling, Lexa softly spoke saying that she had to make dinner, looking down at Olivia seeing the sad pout, she agreed to let her daughter help her cook. That of course led to Oscar wanting to help as well, and soon enough all four of them were in the kitchen cooking the fajitas Lexa had brought earlier. Just like they used to, all together as a family. Once the dinner was cooked, they all sat at the table talking about the movie they had just watched.

 

As they ate on occasion, Oscar or Olivia would need help and of course, they would ask their Mama to help them, and obviously, she did. Oscar went in to full detail of his trip to the supermarket with his Mama, telling his sister and Mommy about the pretty lady he had met. Once Oscar was finished, Olivia told him all about her movie time with their Mommy, how she fell asleep during the film and then her Mommy protected her from the bad man, before she got to see their Mommy’s wedding ring and then watched their Mommy draw a picture. Once both the twin’s had finished explaining their stories to their Mommy and Mama, they had both finished their food and sweetly asked their Mommy if they could have ice cream. As soon as she reminded them that they had another movie to watch, and that they had popcorn waiting for them, they both asked if they could go watch the movie straight away. Clarke laughed telling them they could go and wait for her and their Mama in the front room, the twin’s excitedly jumped down running off to wait patiently on the couch.

 

Clarke and Lexa proceeded to remove the plates from table before carrying them over to the sink where Clarke washed the dishes and Lexa dried them, seeing as there were only four plates they didn’t see the point in put them into the dish washer. Seeing as Lexa had already washed up the items the four of them had used to cook the dinner. Once they had finished they grabbed the two bags of popcorn, making themselves drinks and grabbing themselves some chocolate, they made their way into the living room; they were met with the twin’s looking excitedly at the door waiting for them to come through it. Walking into the room they were told that they had to sit on either side of them, Olivia and Oscar in the middle, Clarke on the Oscar’s left and Lexa on Olivia’s right. They both sat down in the spots they were told to by the twins. Pressing play on the film, Lexa placed her bag of popcorn in between the twins’ lap, opening it for them watching as they excitedly began eating the popcorn.

 

As the movie continued to play on Lexa adjusted herself on the couch, her left arm stretched out across the back of the couch. Soon enough Oscar and Olivia had stuffed themselves with popcorn, dropping the half-empty bag onto the floor carefully, they both stretched out. Forcing Clarke and Lexa to shuffle to their sides a little. As Clarke had adjusted herself to make room for Oscar, whilst Lexa did the same for Olivia, once they had finished moving for the twins’, Clarke and Lexa’s hands had naturally found their way to each other’s’, interlocking their fingers so their palms where naturally resting on the top of the back cushion of the couch. The action felt completely naturally to Lexa, it felt like she was back home where she belonged, but she knew it wasn’t going to last long. Her and Clarke had a long way to go until they were back to where they had been. Trying to calm her mind and stop herself thinking she couldn’t as words began to rush into her head, words she knew would be perfect for one of the songs she had to write. Forcing herself out of her own mind she looked down at her twins’ seeing the happiness on their faces, was something she couldn’t ever get over seeing, she lived to put those smiles on their faces, and she couldn’t wait to be back home permanently to make sure Clarke, Olivia and Oscar smiled every second of the day. Pushing all of her thoughts about the future to the side, she took the chance to enjoy the family time she was getting. 


	15. Mommy's Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 5 Weeks Later...Clarke returns from her Spa weekend with Octavia. Lexa and Clarke spend some time alone.  
> Plus a flashback :-)

** Chapter Fifthteen-Mommy’s back **

March 13th 2017- 5 Weeks Later

Over the last few weeks since Clarke and Lexa’s reunion, things had been getting better between Lexa and Clarke. Since that night, Clarke and Lexa had spoken on the phone every single night, after Lexa would wish the twins goodnight and tell them a story, Clarke would take the phone and they would talk for hours until one of them fell asleep. And as they had agreed, every weekend Lexa would stay over and spend the weekend with Clarke and the twins. She would always sleep in the guest room, both her and Clarke knowing they weren’t ready to share a bed yet; they both needed time to process everything that had happened over the last year. Every Friday evening, Clarke would take the twins to the supermarket, where Lexa would meet them before they would both drive back to their house in their different cars, Olivia would go with Clarke and Oscar would go with Lexa. They would meet back at the house, that would be followed by a family dinner on the couch and a movie marathon, which would always lead to the twins falling asleep two movies in. Every Saturday they would end up doing something different, one week it would be a funfair and the other it would be a day out with Octavia, Raven and Zachary, something Lexa found hard to deal with especially considering her sister was being lied to, but everytime she would push her own emotions and feeling to the side for her kids and Clarke. The whole weekend would go great; Lexa and Clarke would take the time to sit down at the table and talk to each other about everything, mainly they would talk about their issues and what they thought they needed to do to fix everything.

 

Every Sunday the twins would get emotional at bedtime knowing that their Mama would be gone in the morning. After a few weeks, they both adjusted to their Mama leaving knowing they would get to talk to her the next day. Over the weeks, the twin’s behaviour had improved massively, they would only throw a tantrum once in a few weeks but as soon as Clarke would raise her voice, they would stop their tantrum, knowing that they would get in massive trouble if their Mama found out they were being naughty. Of course every night Clarke would talk to Lexa and tell her whenever the twin’s would play up, Lexa wouldn’t tell them off because she knew Clarke would have done that already, and upsetting the twins before they went to bed wasn’t a good idea. Clarke and Lexa had talked about whether or not they should be worried about the twin’s behaviour but after numerous conversations, they decided that the behaviour was more than likely to do with Lexa being away from them, and to do with them missing her. They had talked about how the behaviour hadn’t been as bad since Lexa started calling them every night, and they decided that they would leave it a few more weeks to see how the twins’ behaviour was over those weeks.

 

The weeks passed and over they had begun to get into a routine of everyday life, making them feel like there was some resemblance of normality in a family living apart. Though it felt strange the routine brought Clarke some stability, and talking to Lexa every night made her feel more like herself. And the more normal she felt the easier life felt for her. A few weeks after her and Lexa had kissed and talked, she finally went and saw Wells, after the fist session with him they both agreed that he wasn’t the best person for her to talk to, a week later she was given a therapist recommendation by Wells. Before she knew it, it was March 9th and it was time for her and Octavia to go away on their spa weekend. She’d talked to Lexa about it and about not going, and Lexa had told her that no matter what had happened or what Octavia had done, they were still best friends and that maybe this weekend away was just what they needed, maybe Octavia wanted one more weekend of peace before everything went crazy. Clarke agreed and asked Lexa to have the twins’, which Lexa had of course agreed to, after a short discussion Clarke told Lexa she could stay at their house with the twins’ instead of going to her apartment. And after some debating and persuasion, Lexa agreed, realising that it would be less stressing on the twins.

 

To Clarke and Lexa’s surprise when Clarke was packing the twin’s didn’t get emotional about the thought of her leaving, they instead were asking her loads of questions about where she was going, their imaginations caught by the brochure Clarke had been given by Octavia. They sat on Clarke’s bed even helping her pack by handing or running and grabbing things for her, as they helped her back her bag Clarke answered all their questions smiling and laughing as they would find another questions to ask instantly. After Clarke had finished backing her bag, the twins’ helped her go through her checklist before they sweetly carried the bag downstairs for her, the whole time watched closely by Clarke who had gone in front of them. The only time any tears escaped from their eyes was as Clarke was leaving, as they cried Clarke wrapped her arms around the twin’s telling them she was only gonna be gone for three days. The twins responded by telling her they would still miss her. Pulling back she smiled at them, wrapping them up in massive hugs one at a time, peppering their faces with kisses before Octavia pulled up and she was forced to say goodbye. Making them promise to look after their Mama, to which both of them laughed and promised they would. Lexa and Clarke shared a gentle hug, with Lexa whispering to Clarke to enjoy herself, as she released Clarke, Lexa knelt down near the twins all three of them watching as Clarke climbed into Raven’s Light Blue and Black Land Rover/Range Rover Evoque Hatchback 4x4, that after much persuasion Raven had let Octavia borrow for the weekend. As Clarke got into the passengers side, Lexa distracted the twins by getting them to wave and blow kisses for their Mommy. And soon enough the car had disappeared out of sight, Lexa managed to get the twins back inside getting them to help her with the cleaning and tidying up, the distraction worked and soon enough it was bed time and the twins were completely knackered from all their work.

 

The weekend had gone on to be pretty normal for Lexa and the twins, they would wake up she’d give them breakfast and both mornings at 10am they would ask to call their Mommy. Which Lexa would do, they’d both spend Fifthteen minutes talking to their Mommy before Lexa would get on the phone and chat quickly to Clarke. Once they had finished that phone call, Oscar and Olivia went about their usual business playing outside in the garden. They would wear themselves out and then make their way back into the house for juice. After that they would pull their Mama out into the garden and ask her to play with them, Lexa would oblige and they would end up playing outside for hours. On the second day, Raven had come over to the house with Zachary and let the twins play with their cousin, as Lexa and Raven watched their kids playing they talked over some tracks they had to write, along with talking about everything music related, along with talking about Clarke and Lexa’s reunion. For Lexa, the days passed by too quick, she was so happy just to be around her kids without having to worry about anything, she could just be with her kids, her family. Raven had ended up staying the night with Zachary, they slept in the guest room whilst Lexa slept on the couch a duvet covering her as she leant against a pillow, still unable to sleep in her and Clarke’s bedroom.

 

It was now 3am early Sunday Morning and Lexa was being woken up by Olivia, who had just had a dream about the bad man, in the afternoon before whilst she had been playing in the garden with her brother and cousin, she’s screamed telling her Mama she’d seen the bad man. Not seeing her Mama in the guest room, she tried her Mommy and Mama’s bedroom but found nothing, so she’d made her way down the stairs hoping to find her Mama. Blinking her eyes a few times, Lexa lifted her head up looking down her eyes fell on the frightened face of her daughter:

 

“Princess, what’s wrong?” She asked sitting herself up slightly, opening her arms allowing Olivia to climb onto the couch next to her.

 

“I had a really bad dream Mama…the bad man was here again”

 

“Oh princess, it’s ok Mama’s here now” She soothed wrapping her arms around Olivia and lifting her gently onto her lap, her daughter pyjama clad body stretching out on her Mama’s her head resting on her Mama’s chest, as she wrapped her arms around her Mama “Do you wanna tell me what happened?” Olivia shook her head “Did he hurt Mama again?” Olivia nodded her head at the question. Sliding Olivia up her chest a little more so Olivia’s forehead was resting against her neck, the side of Olivia’s head resting on Lexa’s shoulder. Placing a gentle kiss on her daughter head Lexa softly spoke “You remember what me and Mommy told you about bad dreams…”

 

“There just dreams”

 

“Exactly, it’s just because you were worrying about something. So your mind goes a little crazy…” Lexa paused as Olivia giggled softly against her chest “And, sometimes our mind makes us see bad things. But it doesn’t mean it’s real, it just feels really real”

 

“Very real Mama”

 

“I know baby, but you’re with Mama now and I’ll keep you safe”

 

“Forever?”

 

“Forever princess” Lexa’s words seemed to work as she felt Olivia relax more against her

 

“Can I get in the cover Mama?”

 

“Of course you can baby” Lexa responded smiling as Olivia pushed against her chest pushing herself up, jumping down on to the floor, waiting with a small excited smile on her face. She watched as Lexa pulled the duvet cover back, as Lexa held the cover in the air Olivia jumped back up onto her Mama. Moving herself round until she was in the small space, Lexa had made between herself and the back of the couch. Once Olivia was laying in the space, her head gently resting on her Mama’s shoulder, with Lexa’s arm wrapped around her daughter’s back, Lexa lowered the duvet cover over herself and her daughter, laughing softly as Olivia wriggled closer to her in excitement. Lifting her head a little higher on her Mama’s chest, after a minute of laying like this Olivia climbed onto her Mama, laying herself on her Mama’s chest her legs draping either side of Lexa’s legs, Lexa didn’t stop her daughter she instead kept her arms wrapped around her daughter, knowing this was how her daughter would want to cuddle after a nightmare. Wrapping her arms tightly around Olivia, Lexa shuffled to her right leaning herself against the back of the couch. Peaking down at Olivia she noticed the little girl was already sleeping soundly against her chest, a natural smile on her face, that smile caused a natural smile to grace Lexa’s face placing a gentle kiss on Olivia’s forehead Lexa closed her eyes slowly drifting off to sleep.

 

* * *

 

8am- Later That Morning

Lexa slowly woke up as she felt the couch she was laying on move; taking a breath, she looked down feeling her daughter still sleeping clinging to her chest. Turning to her left, she instantly saw Oscar sitting on the couch in his pyjamas, eating a piece of chocolate covered toast a genuine smile on his face. Smiling back at her son she carefully lifted herself and Olivia backwards until she was sitting up, with Olivia slowly beginning to wake against her chest. Leaning her head against the back of the couch, she looked to Oscar softly greeting him:

 

“Good Morning Handsome”

 

“Morning Mama” Oscar softly responds, keeping his voice down so he didn’t disturb his sister

 

“Did you make yourself toast?”

 

“Nuh uh Mama, we’re not allowed to use the lectrics”

 

“No you’re not allowed to use the electrics, so how did you get toast?”

 

“Auntie Rae did it for me”

 

“She did huh…you should feel lucky she doesn’t make chocolate toast for anyone”

 

“That’s what Auntie Rae said Mama” Oscar responded giggling at his Mama as he finished his toast

 

“You had your juice as well?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“What a lucky boy Auntie Rae’s been taking good care of you hasn’t she?”

 

“Yeah…me and Zach got special trea.....treatment”

 

“When did you learn that word?”

 

“Auntie Rae taught me today…she said it means care”

 

“She’s kind of right, it means more but all you need to know is it means care, like caring for someone”

 

“Ok Mama”

 

“Why don’t you go get dressed, I’ll be up in a bit”

 

“Ok Mama” Oscar quickly responded before shuffling forward on the couch and jumping off, he happily moved across the living room ascending the stairs to the landing that lead to his bedroom.

 

Looking down at Olivia, Lexa now noticed the little girl’s eyes were open and looking up at her. Smiling at her daughter, she noticed the smile appear on her daughter’s face. “Good Morning Princess” Olivia lifted her head softly looking at her Mama not saying a word “You ok?” Olivia nodded her head “Hungry?” Olivia shook her head “Ok then, should we go get you dressed?” Olivia nodded her head. Lexa smiled removing the duvet covers from over them both. Lifting her daughter onto her chest, she carried Olivia up the stairs and into the twins’ bedroom as she entered she noticed Oscar going through the two draws that held his clothes in the chest of drawers. Smiling at Oscar, she walked over to Olivia’s bed placing Olivia gently on the bed; she walked over to the chest of drawers looking down at her son. “What are you looking for my prince?”

 

“I wanna look smart for Mommy, but I can’t find my nice top Mama”

 

“What nice top baby? You have loads”

 

“The one that is Mommy’s favourite colour”

 

“The dark green one?”

 

“Yeah, green like our eyes Mama” Oscar smiled up at his Mama; a smile resembling Clarke’s when she wanted something from her.

 

“Alright let’s see if we can find it” Lexa smiled moving to the draw, opening it up a little more she reached to the back carefully lifting the shirts up, going through them one and a time she found the polo t-shirt he son was asking about. “Here it is Oz, what pants do you want to wear?” Oscar looked up at her with a gleeful smile on his face, before his face filled with a look of concentration. Looking back to the draw, he looked down at his Mama’s pyjama covered legs “What one’s are you gonna wear Mama?”

 

“I’ll probably wear some jeans baby”

 

“Can I wear jeans?”

 

“Of course” Lexa responded as she let out a small giggle before looking into the draw. Moving a few things around in the draw she kept looking until she found a pair of Oscar’s dark blue jeans, pulling them out of the draw, she held them in front of Oscar letting her son examine the jeans and the styled rips that covered the legs. “How about these ones?”

 

“There perfect Mama” Oscar let out with an excited clap as he jumped up and down a few times on the spot. Stopping himself, he looked into the draw grabbing a pair of boxer before looking at his Mama explaining, “Have to wear underwear Mama”

 

“Yes you do”

 

“Mama wears underwear”

 

“Hey mister…” Lexa started reaching forward grabbing her son, turning him and pulling him gently towards her until his back was against her chest, tickling him she continued “You don’t need to worry about Mama’s underwear” She finished as she tickled Oscar, a massive giggle erupted from his chest as he wriggled stepping away from his Mama. As Oscar turned around, he looked seriously at his Mama, giving her a look that was identical to Clarke’s when she was being serious:

 

“No tickling Mama, I have to get ready for Mommy”

 

“Ok my prince” Lexa started holding her hands in the air “I won’t tickle you; you go get ready in the bathroom but don’t lock the door and make sure you wash ok?” Oscar nodded his head before turning and excitedly running towards the bathroom. Turning her attention back to Olivia, she noticed the little girl was staring at her a look of apprehension on her face “What’s up my princess?”

 

“Can I pick something Mama?”

 

“Something to wear?” Olivia nodded her head nervously at the question. “Of course you can princess, do you know what you want to wear?” Olivia again nodded her head at her Mama “Come on then, come and show me” Olivia excitedly jumped down from her bed, a smile spreading across her face as she walked quickly to her Mama, closing her brothers draws before pulling open the very bottom draw, reaching into it she found what she was looking for. Pulling it out she held it in front of her Mama, allowing her Mama to take in the light Blue coloured dress with small daisy’s covering certain points. It was a simple enough dress, short enough for Olivia to run around with no sleeves on it. Looking at her daughter Lexa smiled “You wanna look smart for Mommy as well?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mama. “Ok then, we have to wait until Oscar is done, but then you can get washed and changed”

 

“But I have to get ready quick Mama”

 

“Why baby?”

 

“Because Mommy will be back soon, I have to look perfect before then Mama”

 

“Ok princess…..how about we use Mommy’s bathroom to get you ready?”

 

Olivia let out a small gasp before asking, “Can I Mama?”

 

“Of course you can” Lexa took the dress off her daughter “What about underwear?” Olivia bit her bottom lip slightly before she sprang into action looking into the draw finding a pair of her princess knickers (Panties). Turning back to her Mama, she smiled brightly as she held the underwear in the air. “Ok then let’s get you all washed” Olivia’s face filled with a massive smile as she excitedly turned around and walked towards her Mommy’s bathroom.

 

* * *

 

  **45 Minutes Later**

Lexa had followed her daughter into the bathroom helping her get undressed as she ran a quick bath for the little girl. She knew her daughter wasn’t a fan of showers or washes, so she decided seeing as Clarke wasn’t due back until midday, she had plenty of time to get Olivia washed and dressed. She sat on the toilet seat looking watching her daughter contently playing in the bath. Letting Olivia play on for a little before reminding her to wash herself, which the little girl did, before she looked sweetly up at her Mama asking her to wash her hair for her. Lexa obliged quickly washing her daughter’s hair, once she was finished she pulled the plug as Olivia stood up smiling at her Mama as she walked over to her wrapping a towel around her. Lifting Olivia out of the bath Lexa quickly dried her off before helping Olivia get dressed, drying her hair and braiding it before they went downstairs to the kitchen. As they walked into the kitchen, they came across Raven sitting at the table with Zachary on her lap as she combed his hair to the side. Oscar was on the chair opposite Raven and Zachary, his hair half brushed to the side as he drank a glass of water. Walking to the fridge, with Olivia holding onto her hand the whole time, Lexa prepared some toast for herself, placing some butter on it before carrying the plate over to the table, sitting herself down in the chair between Raven and Oscar. As Lexa sat down she placed the plate on the table, as Olivia came to stand next to her, innocently smiling at her Mama, Lexa relented smiling back before lifting her daughter onto her lap before removing a piece of toast and beginning to eat.

 

As she ate her food she smiled when Olivia would ask for a bite, the whole time turning down her Auntie Raven’s offer of making her some toast of her own. Instead, she kept taking the occasional bite out of her Mama’s toast, before Lexa offered her the last slice of toast; Olivia happily accepted offering her Mama a bite before continuing to finish the piece. Once she and Olivia were finished with their breakfast, Lexa lifted Olivia up with her carrying her daughter across the kitchen until she was at the sink, placing the plate in the sink before turning around and making herself a cup of tea, once she finished it she carried it over and placed it on the table before looking at her son seeing the questioning look on his face. After a second or two he asked his Mama if she could do his hair for her, which she agreed to, Olivia was about to protest, until Zachary jumped off his Mama’s lap running over to his Bing toy, which was sitting on the kitchen floor, with her son playing on the floor Raven called over to her niece asking her to come sit with her. Olivia quickly agreed jumping down and running the short space to her Auntie Raven, as she reached her, Raven lifted Olivia up onto her lap hugging her tightly before they began talking about music, with Olivia asking her auntie any question she could think of.

 

With Olivia distracted Lexa turned her attention to her son, turning herself around she looked at her son, motioning for him to come and stand between her legs. Quickly Oscar obliged jumping down from his sit and stopping between his Mama’s legs, his back facing his Mama as he pulled his comb from his jeans pocket, the action making Lexa laugh softly. Leaning down she wrapped her arms around him, placing a gentle kiss on his cheek, sitting herself back up she began to part her son’s hair, doing as she always did until she had completed his hair to the exact perfect way he always liked it. Once she was finished Oscar gave his Mama a kiss on the lips before hugging her tightly, as he let her go he ran into the living room re-emerging with a few of his action figures, without a word to anyone in the room he walked over to Zachary sitting down next to him. Raven and Lexa watched with smiles on their faces as Oscar gave Zachary one of the action men, sweetly showing his younger cousin how to play with it. Turning their attention back to Olivia, Lexa smiled as her daughter noticed she wasn’t helping her brother anymore, jumping down from her aunties lap she stepped back to her Mama smiling as her Mama lifted her up on to her lap. Resting her head on her Mama’s chest, she remained quiet as her Auntie Raven began talking:

 

“So what’s the plan this week sis?”

 

“I have no idea; we’ve got that meeting tomorrow with WMG. Then Wednesday we have a meeting with Island Records then Thursday it depends on how the meetings tomorrow and Wednesday go.”

 

“Cool, I wanna take O out for dinner on Friday night. You know have a date night, just me and her all night, no worrying about getting interrupted. O starts her new shoot on April 2nd which isn’t actually that far away.”

 

“You got a sitter?”

 

“Not yet, I was hoping my amazing twin sister would help me out”

 

“Mmmm…” Lexa started looking down at Olivia she softly asked, “What do you think Liv? Should I help Auntie Rae?” Olivia looked up at her nodding her head at the question biting her bottom lip softly as she giggled slightly “Well seeing as my princess says I should, sure I will…as long as Clarke’s ok with it”

 

“Why would Clarke have to be ok with it?” Raven asked, the reason dawning on her as she added “Ohhhh yeah, you stay here weekends, sorry my bad. I forgot for a second, too busy thinking about other things”

 

“It’s cool, I’m used to it. You’re the horny twin and I’m the intelligent one”

 

“You’re so not the intelligent one”

 

“Oh please”

 

“I aced my exams”

 

“So did I dummy…”

 

“Bad Mama” Olivia let out as she gently tapped her Mama on the shoulder gaining her attention, looking up at her Mama her face stern and unhappy. None of them hearing the front door opening up or Clarke and Octavia quietly entering the living room, as they kept their attention on each other.

 

“Why am I bad princess?”

 

“You can’t be mean to Auntie Rae”

 

“But Auntie Rae was mean to me”

 

“You can’t call names Mama, names are really bad Mama”

 

Before Lexa had a chance to respond to her daughter, they all heard footsteps in the Living room, jumping down from her Mama’s lap Olivia peaked her head through the door. As her eyes landed on her Mommy, she took off in a run, her little legs going as fast as they could as she screamed out “MOMMY” She didn’t stop running until Clarke lifted her off the ground, bringing her daughter to her chest, hugging her as tightly as she could without hurting her. Olivia leant back her hands resting in her Mommy’s hair as she looked at her smiled, kissed her on the lips, and then went back to hugging her Mommy “I missed you Mommy” Olivia softly mumbled into her Mommy’s neck, small tears escaping her eyes as she held onto her Mommy with everything she had. Clarke relished in holding her daughter, over the last few days she’d missed the twins more than she ever thought was possible. Not seeing them every day wasn’t something she was a fan of, nor was it something she wanted to happen ever again. Pulling back, wanting to see her daughters face and smile again; she frowned when she noticed the tears on Olivia’s cheeks:

 

“Why are you crying princess?”

 

“I really missed you Mommy….” Olivia sadly let out, her bottom lip sticking out and quivering a little as she leant forward, again holding onto her Mommy “Don’t go again Mommy”

 

“You don’t want me to go away again?” Olivia shook her head at her Mommy “But why not Princess….Mama took good care of you and it was only for three days baby”

 

“I Don’t like Mommy being gone” Olivia stated looking at her Mommy before wiping her own tears away “I like it when Mommy and Mama are both here”

 

“I know you do princess…I do to…But how about we stop being emotional and you tell me all about what you and Mama did this weekend…have you had loads of fun?”

 

“YES…..we played loads and loads and Mama let me sleep with her when I had a bad dream”

 

“You had a bad dream?”

 

“Yeah, but Mama cuddled with me and the bad dream went away Mommy”

 

“That’s great”

 

“Yeah, and Mama helped me get dressed” Suddenly Olivia remembered her dress wriggling down her Mommy until she was on the ground, taking a few excited steps back she held her arms out to the side looking at her Mommy “Look Mommy, I dressed like a princess”

 

“Wow…. you look just like a princess…..that is my favourite dress of yours”

 

“I know Mommy”

 

“Did you pick it just for me?”

 

“Yes”

 

“Ah princess, come give me more cuddles…I’ve missed you loads” Without a second thought Olivia ran over to her Mommy, laughing as her Mommy lifted her up and carefully fell back onto the couch keeping Olivia against her chest. She’d missed almost everything about her kids, from the way they smiled to the way they smelt, she knew it was maybe a little weird to miss their smell, but there was something different about the way her kids smelt, it was unique to them both. She guessed the twins felt the same way about her and Lexa, she knew both her and Lexa had their own smell, she knew because she loved the smell Lexa left behind, it was like a natural bouquet of flowers in the springtime. Her attention was brought back to her daughter when she felt Olivia moving on her chest. “So come on tell me all about your weekend?” Olivia was about to talk when Clarke remembered Octavia was still in the room “O, take a seat” Looking back down at Olivia she added “Sorry baby, go ahead tell Mommy everything”

 

Again, before Olivia could say word she was interrupted as Raven’s voice filled the room, her head peeking through the door as she asked, “Did I hear someone say O?” As she scanned the room, her eyes landed on her wife, a smile breaking across her face as she quickly moved across the room wrapping her arms around Octavia, lifting her off the floor slightly. She placed Octavia back on the floor pulling back slightly and connecting their lips together for a second before pulling back and smiling at Octavia “Welcome back” She smiled more as Octavia kept her arms wrapped around her neck.

 

“If that’s the welcome back I get….I think I’ll go away more”

 

“Please don’t, sleeping alone in our bed isn’t something I like much”

 

“Aw baby, is that your way of saying you missed me?”

 

“I more than missed you…..I felt kind of empty without you”

 

“You don’t need to sweet talk me…your already getting some later”

 

“Oh I am huh?” Raven asked her voice changing and becoming slightly husky as Octavia nodded her head, Raven raised her eyebrows smirking as she leant forward recapturing Octavia’s lips.

 

“Seriously guys…in front of my daughter” Lexa interrupted as she walked into the room, her words causing Octavia and Raven to break apart both looking at her and laughing softly as she walked over to them “More importantly, in front of me”

 

“Oh Lexie…do you want some Raven loving” Raven added removing herself from her wife, stepping forward and wrapping her arms around her sister’s neck, locking her arms then planting kisses on Lexa’s cheek as Lexa tried to get out of her grip

 

“Argh Rae get off of me” Lexa said poking her sister in the stomach before they both began playfully tussling with each other. Both of them laughing softly as they did so. The two of them continued to tussle with each other for a few minutes until Lexa managed to get out of Raven’s grip playfully pushing her sister back. Raven was about to lunge back at Lexa when Zachary came padding into the room, walking with a mission, gaining everyone’s attention before he ran towards his Mommy seeing her for the first time in days as he smiled brightly. As he reached his Mommy, she lifted him up, his arms wrapping quickly and firmly around Octavia’s neck as she kissed him on the cheek numerous times. Before she pulled, back seeing the massive smile on his face:

 

“Hi baby”

 

“Hi Mommy”

 

“I missed you so much”

 

“Missed Mommy”

 

“You did?” Octavia asked as Zachary nodded his head, leaning forward and resting his head gently against his Mommy’s “Good because I want loads of cuddles to make up for missing you” Octavia smiled when Zachary kept his head resting against hers, his eyes closed as he held onto his Mommy.

 

As Zachary held onto his Mommy, Oscar came jogging into the room looking up at his Auntie Octavia, Auntie Raven and his little cousin. His attention not coming across his Mama or his sister and Mommy sitting on the couch cuddling. Looking up at his cousin, it finally registered that Zachary was with his Mommy and Zachary's Mommy was with his Mommy “Hi Aunt Octavia” He sweetly said, before Octavia could respond he continued asking, “Where’s my Mommy?”

 

“I’m here baby” Clarke smiled out unable to keep herself quiet any longer. Olivia had quietly climbed off her Mommy’s lap allowing her Mommy to move, ready to hug her brother.

 

Oscar’s face filled with confusion before he turned around and saw his Mommy sitting forward on the couch, his twin sister sitting a few inches away from her. “MOMMY” He loudly and happily let out taking off and running towards her as fast as he could manage to run. Once he was close, enough he jumped, launching himself onto his Mommy’s chest, the force causing Clarke to fall back as she caught her son in her arms. Oscar giggled softly before pushing himself back and looking happily at his Mommy “Your home Mommy”

 

“Yes I am”

 

“I missed you Mommy”

 

“I missed you too baby”

 

“Look Mommy, I dressed smart for you” Oscar proudly let out sitting himself up on his Mommy’s lap showing her the shirt and jeans he had picked out “Do you like it?”

 

“I love it…you look like the little prince you are”

 

“Thank you Mommy”

 

“You’re welcome….Now come on you two….give me some Twin cuddles” Clarke let out smiling massively, Olivia and Oscar smiled brightly at her, Olivia quickly making her way to her Mommy, as soon as she was close enough Olivia and Oscar launched themselves at their Mommy at the same time. Clarke’s arms wrapped around her son and daughter holding onto them releasing exactly how much she’d missed them over the last three days. As she thought about it, she looked across the room her eyes catching Lexa’s a smile spread across her face as she remembered the moment they had shared weeks ago.

 

* * *

 

  ** _February 8 th 2017-Woods House-5 weeks ago_**

_Clarke and Lexa were sat on the couch watching the remainder of Tangled; Lexa had carried the twin’s upstairs separately about ten minutes ago, before returning to sit on the couch with Clarke. As Lexa had sat back down Clarke found the courage to ask Lexa to stay the night, in case Roan came back. Lexa agreed under the condition that she would sleep in the guest room and leave before the twins woke up. Now they were sat in pure silence with both of them thinking of what to say. Clarke finally decided she wanted to bring up the misunderstanding they had earlier, and the only way she could think to bring it up was to bring up the woman involved:_

_“So how is Luna?” She asked looking at Lexa once before turning her attention back to the TV_

_“She’s doing really well; she actually has a daughter now….and her and Derrick have separated”_

_“No way… I didn’t know that”_

_“Me neither, I haven’t seen her since you were pregnant”_

_“Yeah, that was so long ago”_

_“Yeah, a lot has changed…” Realising how that must have sounded Lexa continued, “Not us with her, she was telling me how she owns a Marina now and a few boats as well. She mainly talked about her daughter, Becca. That’s it really…”_

_“So are her and Derrick gonna work it out?”_

_“Not from what I heard….he cheated on her with her cousin or something. She found them in bed and kicked him out…their being amicable for Becca’s sake. But I got the feeling she hates him”_

_“That’s sad”_

_“Yeah it is” Lexa added noticing Clarke hadn’t once looked at her since they started talking “Clarke, why aren’t you looking at me?”_

_“I’m multi-tasking Lexa”_

_“Clarke, I know you better than that”_

_“Ok…I wanna apologise for being a raving jealous mess and I can’t do that if I’m looking at you”_

_“Why not?”_

_“Because I feel ashamed”_

_“You don’t need to be ashamed Clarke, at least your admitting you’re a jealous hot mess”_

_Clarke’s head darted around looking at Lexa her face unimpressed and slightly shocked “I am not a hot mess” Seeing the smirk on Lexa’s face her face relaxed and she let out a single laugh before adding “That’s not funny”_

_“It was though”_

_“Whatever”_

_“Look, I know you’re sorry that you went a little jealous Clarke before…you don’t need to apologise. BUT I will say that nothing would or could EVER happen between me and Luna, for one she’s straight and on top of that we’ve known each other since we were kids, I could never see her like that”_

_“Arghhhhh” Clarke let out leaning forward resting her head on the couch underneath her head “I’m so stupid and overemotional”_

_“No you’re not Clarke; you’re just in a bad head space right now” Looking around the room she noticed the sound bar, standing up she walked over to it turning on the power, pulling her phone out of her pocket she plugged the aux cable in. Scrolling through her phone, she found the app that held all the blank tracks anyone would send her and Raven. Pulling up the Ed Sheeran track, she was struggling to find the words for; pressing play, she made sure the volume wasn’t too high. As the music filled the room, Clarke lifted her head up from the couch looking at Lexa in slight confusion. Seeing the look on Clarke’s face, she added:_

_“Dance with me Clarke?”_

_“I don’t know Lex”_

_“Come on Clarke, just relax and come dance with me” She added holding her left hand out to the blonde “Please for me” Clarke let out a small breath, a smile filling her face as she lifted her hand up gently placing it in Lexa’s. Standing up she smiled when Lexa pulled her until they were chest-to-chest, and hip-to-hip. Wrapping her right arm around Clarke’s waist, her left hand still gently holding onto Clarke’s right hand as they began to softly sway to the music “See not that bad” Lexa softly smiled, her cheek gently pressed against the side of Clarke’s head._

_“We’re dancing in the middle of the living room Lex”_

_“Ok, so just imagine we’re outside on the grass, dancing bare foot”_

_“What like on Prom night???”_

_“Exactly like Prom night, just without you feeling sick of course”_

_“Of course” Clarke smiled back remembering her Prom night, she’d become sick at the beginning of the day and couldn’t go to Prom, so Lexa turned up at her door with the radio from her car playing out loudly. Lexa was wearing her plain clothes, having changed out of her dress, once she was outside she called out to Clarke, after persuading Clarke to get changed into her prom dress, Lexa danced the night away with Clarke telling her how perfect she looked. Even though Clarke insisted, she looked a mess Lexa would continue to tell her she was perfect until Clarke stopped arguing. They had ended up dancing the night away together until the early hours._

_As the instrumental of the song played on, Lexa found words flowing in her mind as she remembered her and Clarke dancing on Griffin’s front lawn. She remembered how she had to lead, how Clarke panicked saying she didn’t know how to dance, she remembered telling Clarke to follow her lead. She remembered Clarke continuing to insist that she looked a mess; she remembered telling the blonde how beautiful she looked every chance she got. She also remembered it was the first time she old Clarke she loved her, and it was the first time Clarke told her she loved her. She remembered not thinking she deserved someone as perfect and amazing as Clarke. As she remembered all those things, the words hit her like a brick wall, as the words whizzed around her brain she unknowingly stopped, she only realised when she heard Clarke’s voice:_

_“You’ve just thought of a song haven’t you?” Looking down at Clarke her face told her everything that Clarke needed, a massive smile spreading across her face as she realised she was right. Seeing the guilt about to flood Lexa she added “I know that look Lexa…go quickly, go write the song before you forget the words” Clarke smiled as a smile broke out onto Lexa’s face, without a word Lexa turned around and walked off towards the den, stopping herself she turned back grabbing her phone before disappearing into the den. Clarke sat down on the couch, turning her attention back to the TV and the film playing out on the screen. Within minutes Lexa came back into the Living room walking over to Clarke, she held her right hand out “I thought you were writing a song?” Clarke asked, the look on Lexa’s face told her that she was right and Lexa was in song writing mode._

_“I am Clarke but I need you to come with me”_

_Clarke didn’t bother asking or protesting instead, she just let out a small giggle then stood up placing her hand in Lexa’s, amusement filling her body as Lexa pulled her through the house and into the den. She smirked when Lexa continued pulling her until she was sat in her chair. Without a word, Lexa pulled her until she was sat on her Lexa’s lap, her right side against Lexa’s chest, as Lexa’s left arm wrapped around her waist, as Lexa let go of her hand she wrapped her right arm around Lexa’s shoulders balancing herself. She watched as Lexa placed a headphone in her ear restarting the track as she picked up the pencil resting on her notepad. As Lexa concentrated on the track playing in her ear, Clarke watched on, watching as Lexa began jotting down words, her left hand gently rubbing up and down Clarke’s back. Lexa had listened to the song once or twice before she pressed play again, this time though the song played out and about thirty seconds in Lexa began writing again, before stopping and looking up at Clarke, without a word or warning she leant forward kissing Clarke on the cheek smiling at her. The action just made Clarke smile, her right hand gently moving up and down stroking Lexa’s shoulder. Lexa didn’t say anything she just kept writing until she had listened to the back track about twenty times since she pulled Clarke into the den. Lexa had written out words on five different sheets of paper. She was now placing the pencil back in the stationary holder on her desk, clenching and unclenching her hand a few times she looked to Clarke smiling before softly saying:_

_“I’m sorry about pulling you in here”_

_“It’s ok, I’m used to it. You used to say it was because I’m your muse”_

_“It is….I was just thinking about you, and needed you close to help write the song”_

_“So I’m still your muse”_

_“Always” Lexa honestly replied, her smile was genuine and pure, a type of smile that Clarke hadn’t seen in a long time. Without a thought she leant forward connecting her lips with Lexa’s, when she realised what she was doing she pulled back looking at Lexa:_

_“I’m so sor….” Before Clarke could finish what she was saying Lexa was kissing her again, their lips melting together as Clarke leant against her wife a little more._

_The night continued on like this for them, they had spent about thirty minutes in the den making out before they both agreed it was a bad idea to get too carried away with each other so soon after getting back together. So instead, they went back into the living room, sitting on the couch, like they used to, Lexa sitting in the corner bend of the couch with her right arm wrapped around Clarke’s shoulder, as Clarke gently laid on her, her right arm holding onto Lexa’s, as the night rolled on and they naturally feel asleep with the feeling of the other next to them._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed the three chapters just uploaded, I am just finishing off writing Chapter 18, I'll be uploading this later tonight on FanFic.net and will be uploading Chapter 16 and 17 on here in about two days...So until next time peeps and peepettes Stay Safe and Keep Fanficing :-)


	16. I Missed You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke spends some time with Lexa and the Twins after returning home

** Chapter Sixteen-I missed you **

As the memory flashed through her mind Clarke managed to push the memory to the back of her mind, regaining her focus she smiled softly at Lexa, who returned the smile with one of her own. Looking down at her twin’s she listened as they excitedly told her about their weekend with their Mama. They told her all about how their Auntie Raven came over and stayed the night with Zachary. As they talked, she could hear the excitement in their voices as they took time explaining every detail of everything that had happened when she was away. As they finished talking about the weekend, they both hugged her tightly resting their head on either of Clarke’s shoulders.

 

“Did you miss us Mommy?” Olivia softly asked as her hand gripped onto her Mommy’s shirt.

 

“Are you kidding I missed you loads and loads”

 

“Really?”

 

“Oh yeah, ask Auntie Octavia I was talking about you all the time….and I made her drive faster so I could get back to you quicker”

 

Clarke smiled as Olivia lifted her head off her shoulder sitting back onto her bottom before turning, standing herself up and walking across the couch stopping where her Mama was sat. “Hi Mama” Olivia sweetly said before adding, “Excuse me please Mama” Lexa smiled at her daughter lifting her over her legs so she was closer to Octavia. Once she was close enough she looked up at her Auntie Octavia sweetly asking “Aunt Octavia?”

 

“Yes Livy”

 

“Did my Mommy miss me?”

 

“She did, she missed you and Oz loads. She made me speed so we got back quicker…I wasn’t even aloud my breakfast” Octavia responded still holding Zachary in her arms as she looked down at her niece.

 

Octavia’s words made the little girl smile and giggle in happiness, looking up at her Auntie a question popped into the four year olds head “What is Auntie Rae getting?” The question made Raven and Octavia’s face drop, whilst Lexa and Clarke just looked at them smirking as they both looked slightly helpless at the fact Olivia had listened to their conversation earlier.

 

“How do you mean Liv?”

 

“You said Auntie Rae was already getting something later…..what is she getting?” Olivia asked innocently, not knowing how rude the conversation between her aunties had been.

 

Raven and Octavia stuttered slightly neither of them knowing how to explain or respond to Olivia. Lexa and Clarke continued to look on for a few seconds before Lexa spoke up, holding back a laugh as she looked at her sister “They were talking about sweets Liv….Auntie Rae is getting some sweeties when she gets home”

 

“What sweeties Mama?”

 

“I don’t know baby, and I don’t think Auntie Rae is allowed to know. So we have to let Auntie Octavia keep it a secret ok?”

 

“Ok Mama” Olivia sweetly responded taking a few steps forward on the couch, looking over at her Mommy, seeing her brother was now sitting fully on their Mommy’s lap. She stopped climbing onto her Mama’s lap her legs hanging over the edge of the couch, as her back rested against her Mama’s chest, Lexa brought her arms to wrap around her daughter’s chest holding onto her. “Are you staying Mama?”

 

“Staying?”

 

“Do you have to go now?”

 

“Not right now…I’m going to stay with you all day”

 

“Ok”

 

“Ok….is that alright with you?”

 

“Yeah, I like Mama being here”

 

“And I like being here”

 

“Yay” Olivia sweetly let out laughing softly before looking over to her Mommy “Mommy, Mama is staying”

 

“I know baby, it’s great isn’t it?” Clarke smiled back getting a small nod from Olivia before she looked up at Octavia and Raven softly asking “What about you two? Are you staying a little while?”

 

“Sure…is that alright babe?” Octavia asked looking to Raven who nodded her head smiling softly, Octavia leaned forward kissing Raven once “Great, now Clarke you can feed me…seeing as you forced me to drive hungry” She added before handing Zachary over to Raven, kissing her son on the forehead before walking towards the kitchen. As Octavia walked into the kitchen, Zachary began to cry, instantly Raven followed Octavia into the kitchen her son’s cries stopping instantly.

 

Clarke smiled at her best friend’s actions and words, looking down at Oscar she smiled seeing he was moving himself on her lap, stopping when he was sat just as his sister was. Her eyes scanned the room stopping at Lexa, smiling softly at her as the brunette softly asked, “How was the spa weekend?”

 

“It was great….I missed you all though” Clarke honestly replied seeing the smile on Lexa’s face grow a little bigger at Clarke’s words. “Your sister is going to get a massive bag of sweets, that’s for sure” Clarke added both her and Lexa laughing both of them knowing what Clarke was talking about.

 

Silence overcame them all as they looked at each other, neither of them knowing how to react as they felt the spark rush through them as they looked at each other. The minutes rushed past as they sat in the living room, both of them holding onto Olivia and Oscar, the twins slowly drifting off to sleep as they rested against their respective Mommies. About thirty minutes went past and Octavia emerged with a sleeping Zachary against her chest, carefully walking over to the corner of the couch she placed her son carefully on the couch, picking up a cushion she placed it behind her son before smiling at Lexa and Clarke, turning and returning to the kitchen. Ten minutes later, Clarke carefully moved forward laying Oscar on the couch smiling as her son curled into the back of the couch. At the same time, Lexa did the same with Olivia, also smiling as Olivia did as Oscar did, snuggling herself into the back of the couch. Lexa stepped forward waiting for Clarke before the two of them quietly walked into the kitchen, finding Octavia and Raven making out against the island counter, Octavia was sat on the counter with Raven between her legs, her arms resting on Raven’s shoulders as their lips melted together.

 

Lexa loudly cleared her throat gaining the women’s attention causing them to break apart, neither of them embarrassed about the fact they had just been caught making out on someone else’s kitchen counter. Instead, they both had massive smirks on their faces. Seeing the smirks, Lexa walked over to the counter grabbing her sister and playfully shoving her in the direction of the table, the action making Raven laugh. Octavia instantly jumped down moving to the direction of the table, waiting for Raven to sit down before sitting on her lap, her arm wrapping around Raven’s shoulders. Lexa and Clarke walked over to the counter; Clarke made herself busy looking in the cupboard looking for a snack.

 

“I can make you something if you want” Lexa added leaning against the counter as her attention remained on Clarke

 

“No it’s fine; a snack will hold me over”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“More than sure” Clarke smiled back as she tiptoed finding a mini pack of popcorn, her face filling with a smile as she grabbed it closing the door and turning around. Walking over to the counter leaning against it right next to Lexa smirking at her wife “See it was like fate...”

 

“Your insane”

 

“You love it”

 

“Yeah I do” Lexa honestly and naturally responded, looking over at Raven seeing the look seeing her sister giving her she knew at some point Raven was going to talk to her about her and Clarke. Ignoring her sister’s smug look, she looked to Octavia asking, “How are things going with the prep for your project thing O?”

 

“Um, really good thank Lex….I finished all the designs, I had to edit a few but everything’s ready for the 4th. Hopefully if this all goes well I might get some more work from Sinclair”

 

“Your gonna ace it baby” Raven added placing a gentle kiss on Octavia’s arm.

 

“Maybe yeah”

 

“Rae’s right O…your work is amazing, I’m sure you’ll blow them away.”

 

“Thanks Lex”

 

“No worries” Lexa added feeling Clarke gently rubbing her arm with her hand as she turned to look at Clarke she noticed the smile on her wife’s face “What?” She asked confused about the reason Clarke was smiling at her.

 

“Thanks, for playing nice with her” Clarke responded, keeping her voice low so only her and Lexa could hear what she was saying. “I know you’re not happy about everything, but it means a lot that your letting her do this…so Thank you”

 

“Your welcome….you can make it up to me by letting me cook later”

 

“Isn’t it meant to be me that does something for you?”

 

“Well you technically are…I mean your letting me cook”

 

“Technically huh?”

 

“Uh huh” Clarke responded with a smile before turning her attention back to the popcorn in front of her. Pushing Lexa’s hand away when she tried to steal some popcorn. Shaking her head, she turned her attention back to Raven and Octavia, the four of the getting lost in conversation as their children slept in the living room, with Clarke and Octavia mainly talking about their spa weekend.

* * *

Later that night

The morning had gone on with the four women talked about everything they could, after sometime Olivia, Oscar and Zachary all woke up, all within minutes of each other. Once the kids were awake they all made their ways outside, the adults sat on the benches outside as they watched the three children played in the garden. The hours passed until Zachary again became tired but this time he became very niggly with it, crying saying he wanted to go home. Raven and Octavia had opted to go home, not wanting to stress their son anymore. They said their goodbyes and left Lexa, Clarke and the twins alone. The twins had dragged their Mommy outside asking her to play with them, which she did, Lexa joined in chasing the twins and Clarke around the garden until the twins knackered themselves out. They ended up watching The Little Mermaid, half way into the film Lexa decided to make dinner for everyone, not wanting to leave it too late.

 

Excusing herself it only took her thirty minutes to cook something for them all, carrying the plates into the living room handing them to Oscar, Olivia and Clarke. Getting a thankful smile from Clarke, both of the twins thanking her sweetly before beginning to eat. Once they were finished, eating Lexa carried the plates and cutlery out, washing and drying them before placing them back into the cupboards where they belonged. Returning to the living room just as the film was finishing, she was asked what film she wanted to watch by the twins, she told them to surprise her, and moments later, they had chosen Lady and the Tramp.  Placing the film on, the foursome settled down again, Olivia finding her way on to her Mama’s lap while Oscar found his way onto Clarke’s lap holding onto her tightly as he watched the film. By the time the film had finished it was 8pm and the twins were fast asleep against their respective Moms. Clarke and Lexa silently carried the twins up to their bedroom, placing them into their beds. Once they had tucked the twins in bed, they quietly made their ways out of the twin’s bedroom closing the door quietly, before heading downstairs until they were in the kitchen.

 

Clarke turned around watching as Lexa moved to the fridge opening the door, she watched as Lexa removed a bottle of water and began drinking from it. As she watched, she could have sworn Lexa was trying to be seductive as she drank, even if Lexa wasn’t trying to be seductive, watching Lexa drink was giving Clarke a bubbling feeling of desire inside her. She needed to kiss the brunette; they hadn’t kissed in at least two weeks and anytime they did kiss it hadn’t ended up in a make out session much to Clarke’s annoyance. As she continued to look at Lexa, she ignored any negative thoughts in her mind, pushing aside everything that was telling her to stop and to not move. Instead, she moved forward walking around the kitchen island until she was in front of Lexa. Seeing Clarke’s movements Lexa lowered the bottle from her lips, placing the lid back on it, as she looked at Clarke an amused smile covering her face. Her eyebrows raising slightly as she wondered what Clarke was doing, before she had a chance to process the options. Clarke stopped in front of Lexa, looking into her eyes trying to judge whether to go through with the thoughts she was having. All those thoughts evaporated from her mind as her eyes locked with Lexa’s and she noticed the smile on her face. Without thinking any further, she closed the gap between them, their hips connecting together, and a second later their lips crashed together in a needy and wanting kiss. Lexa instantly kissed Clarke back, her hands moving to Clarke’s hips pulling the blonde closer into her.

 

As the kiss continued, Clarke contained herself not deepening the kiss at all. She was more than ecstatic when Lexa deepens the kiss, her hips naturally moving forward a little pressing her own into Clarke’s. The action took Clarke off guard causing her to stumble back slightly, she was more than sure she was going to fall but Lexa kept a firm grip on her hips holding her up as they moved together. They continued to move backwards until Clarke’s bottom hit the island counter. The two didn’t break apart instead, they continued kissing, their lips almost melting together. As the heat built between them, Lexa’s hands moved down from Clarke’s hips gently grazing over her bottom until they were on the back of Clarke’s thighs. Without thinking, Lexa lifted Clarke off the ground, Clarke’s legs wrapping around Lexa’s waist instinctively, Lexa lifted Clarke onto the counter only for Clarke to break their kiss. Lexa instantly knew what Clarke was thinking, “Right…kitchen counter is a no” She mumbled, getting a nod from Clarke, before biting her bottom lip slightly. Without a word, Lexa lifted Clarke off the counter moving the blonde so she was on her shoulder, the motion elected a squeal from Clarke:

 

“Lexa”

 

“Oh hush” Lexa added continuing with her plan of action. She carried Clarke through the kitchen out and into the living room, continuing to carry her until they were near the couch; carefully kneeling onto the couch, she lowered herself and Clarke onto the couch. As they landed on the couch, Lexa pulled back slightly looking down at Clarke for a second, Clarke wasted no time in leaning in and recapturing Lexa’s lips. Her hands instantly moving to gently grip onto Lexa’s hips, as the kiss continued, Lexa’s hips dropped slightly pressing and resting on Clarke’s causing a rush of sexual urges to shoot through her body. The rush caused her leg to move, cocking and wrapping around Lexa’s waist. Lexa moved her hands from Clarke’s side moving to lean on her forearms so their chests were closer together. The kiss continued to build, both of them suddenly realising exactly how much they’d missed each other. As the kiss got even more heated between them, Clarke’s hands found their way to the edge of Lexa’s shirt. At the same time Lexa’s right hand found it’s way to the bottom hem of Clarke’s shirt. As her hand was about to make its way up Clarke’s shirt, the blonde broke the kiss, looking breathlessly up at the brunette taking a second to catch her breath before she spoke:

 

“Can we stop? …” Seeing the look on Lexa’s face, she felt panic rise inside her “Not that I don’t want to keep going, I just don’t think we should rush things”

 

“It’s ok Clarke, I understand…and your right” Lexa added looking down at Clarke and smiling, pushing her lust and want down deep inside. “Waiting is a good idea…how about we just cuddle and watch a film? Or I can go….whatever you want”

 

“Cuddling and a movie sounds perfect to me”

 

“Good” Lexa smiled out standing up, moving forward picking up the remote control, turning the TV on before crawling back to the corner of the couch, laying herself back on the couch she handed the remote to Clarke. “Nothing depressing please” Clarke smiled, giggling softly at her wife before laying herself back, resting against Lexa’s chest as she went about choosing a film.

 

Once Clarke had chosen a film, the two women relaxed into each other more, keeping their attention on the film, in an attempt to avoid another impromptu make out session. The efforts of both women working until about forty minutes into the film, as soon as Clarke looked at her Lexa couldn’t stop herself from leaning in, and once she pulled back Clarke leant into her, reconnecting their lips ultimately leading them into another make out session. They continued making out until the film titles ran and the sound of the soundtrack to Sister Act playing out. Slowly breaking the connection of her lips and Clarke’s, Lexa took a hard breath in, swallowing hard as she again pushed her own desires down. Clearing her throat she looked at Clarke softly saying “I’m gonna make a move” Clarke looked at Lexa giving her, her best sexy pleading pout:

 

“You don’t have to go Lex….you could stay”

 

“I could….but not even that insanely sexy pout your giving me is gonna change my mind”

 

“Come on Lex, what would you rather be doing…making out with me or sitting at home on your own, thinking about making out with me?”

 

“You’re a horrible tease Clarke Woods”

 

“I know” Clarke smirked leaning forward recapturing Lexa’s lips with her own, allowing herself to lay back pulling the brunette on top of her. Lexa couldn’t help but lean into the blonde, she hadn’t realised how much she’d missed kissing Clarke until the blonde’s lips had connected with hers. Pulling back, she looked down at Clarke, dropping her head and leaning it on Clarke’s shoulder; she let out a groan before lifting her head and asking:

 

“What are you doing to me Clarke?”

 

“What?” Clarke asked trying to fain innocence as she looked up at Lexa, when Lexa raised her eyebrows she bit her bottom lip, before she reached up with her right hand, gently caressing Lexa’s cheek, “I’m sorry ok…It’s just being at that spa, and having all that time to think things over. I realised how lucky I am to have you and the twins. And I realised how much I missed you the moment I saw you today.”

 

“Nice try but no amount of sweet talking is gonna make me stay longer”

 

“But Lex…”

 

“Nu huh” Lexa added climbing off Clarke to stand herself up, looking back seeing Clarke letting out a massive sigh as she rolled her eyes. Lexa walked over to the coat hanger, removing her leather jacket and slipping it on as she watched Clarke walk across the living room until she was in front of her. Stepping forward she gripped onto either side of Lexa’s open jacket, pulling the brunette closer to her until their lips were hovering over each other’s.

 

“Are you sure I can’t convince you to stay?”

 

“I’m sure…I missed you like mad…” Lexa starts leaning forward and pecking Clarke on the lips before continuing “But as much as I missed you, I don’t wanna rush things, and if I stay we will…” Lexa paused taking a breath and openly scanning Clarke’s body “Definitely end up doing anything but taking it slow”, she added running her hand lovingly through Clarke’s hair as the blonde looked at her

 

“Argh…I hate when you’re right”

 

“I know you do”

 

“Ahh, Ok go”

 

“What?”

 

“Go quickly, before I run out of self-control” Clarke firmly says gripping onto Lexa’s jacket more and manoeuvring her around until she was at the door. Opening it with her right hand, she carefully pushed Lexa out of the door, ignoring the amused look on Lexa’s face. As they stepped onto the front porch, Lexa held her hands up.

 

“Ok, I’m gonna go ok”

 

“Good” Lexa smirked leaning forward and kissing Clarke on the cheek before hugging her softly, turning to walk to her car, she smirked to herself stopping and walking back, unable to stop herself, she felt as if she was a teenager, again “I forgot something.” She said as she powered forward crashing into Clarke’s body their lips connecting together, Clarke instantly kissed her back the passion and fire between them reignited. Clarke’s hands found their way to Lexa’s neck pulling her in even more. A minute or so passed and Lexa pulled herself back, looking down at Clarke “I’m sorry I just couldn’t resist”

 

“No need to apologise….Call me when you get back”

 

“I will” Lexa happily smiled leaning forward pecking Clarke on the lips a few times in a row before turning, only lasting a second before turning back “Ok one more, I promise” Clarke laughed as she placed her hands on Lexa’s cheeks pulling her into another kiss, this time it was a kiss filled with pure love and happiness. As she pulled back and removed her hands from Lexa’s cheeks, something behind Lexa caught her attention. Seeing Clarke’s attention move to behind her, Lexa turned both of them seeing the same image in front of them. “Octavia?” 

* * *

 

Woods House-Living Room

Having come across the image of Octavia in complete tears holding a crying and emotional Zachary in her arms, Lexa and Clarke quickly ushered the two inside their house, closing the door. Once inside Lexa took Zachary in her arms calming him down, whilst Clarke did the same with Octavia. Clarke had been trying in vain for the last ten minutes to get Octavia to tell her what was wrong, all she managed to understand was Raven kicked Octavia out:

 

“Why did she kick you out O?”

 

“She knows” Octavia emotionally let out trying to control her tears and her composure

 

“About Monroe?”

 

“Yes”

 

“And she just kicked you out?”

 

“Yes….I've never seen her like that” Octavia sniffles back more tears as she wiped the ones still staining her cheeks “I tried explaining it to her but nothing I said worked she just got more angry with every word I said”

 

“What exactly did you say O?”

 

“Everything, I told her all about me meeting Monroe. I told her that I was the one that told you about Nia and Lexa”

 

“Did you tell her you thought it was true?”

 

“No, I never got the chance to. She just flipped, then Zachary woke up and she told me to get out…that she wanted me gone by the time she got back”

 

“So you just left?”

 

“I didn’t know what to do Clarke, she was so angry. I didn’t want her to come and see me, and get even angrier than she was already, so I packed a bag for me and Zachary and I left” Octavia managed to finish her sentence before the tears began to fall from her eyes again, and the sobs that she had only just supressed erupted from her body again. Clarke wrapped her arm around her friend pulling her closer to her chest, letting Octavia sob her heartbreak out.

 

“Just breath through it O…it’s gonna be ok”

 

Lexa stood at the door watching Clarke sooth Octavia’s sadness and heartbreak, looking down at the sleeping image of her nephew in her arms. He’d calmed down once he was in her arms, and she knew that it was most likely due to him thinking she was Raven. Using that to her advantage, she kept her face hidden from the two year old and gently began bouncing and swaying him in her arms, something she knew from Raven he liked her doing. After a short while, Zachary had fallen asleep in her arms, his weigh shifting and relaxing against her completely. Keeping him safely against her chest, she decided to take her nephew to the guest room, walking through the living room exchanging a soft smile with Clarke, she climbed the stairs continuing to quietly walk across the landing until she reached the guest room to her left. Opening the door quietly she walked to the bed, carefully laying Zachary in the bed she turned around and began slowly walking out the door, turning around she smiled at the sleeping image of her nephew, before pulling the door until it was partially closed allowing a little light into the room. Walking down the stairs she walked through the living room walking to the basement she walked down grabbing the child gate for the stairs, walking up the stairs she quietly placed the gate at the top of the stairs. Once the gate was secure, she walked back down the stairs, coming across the image of Clarke handing Octavia a glass of water. Shaking her head, stepping forward her motion gained Clarke and Octavia’s attention.

 

“I’m gonna leave”

 

“Lex, you don’t have to go”

 

“I do Clarke; I need to go find my sister”

 

“Can you tell her I’m sorry and I really need to talk to her” Octavia asked wiping the tears from her face, seeing the anger instantly appear on Lexa’s face she continued, “I know you hate me right now, and I get that, and I know she does as well but please Lexa. I need her to know how much I love her, I need her to know it was a massive mistake and if I could change it I would.”

 

“I’m not doing your dirty work for you Octavia”

 

“LEX”

 

“No Clarke, everything that’s happened over the last year is all because of you, Octavia. Because you couldn’t do what she asked of you, and you know EXACTLY why she didn’t want you anywhere near Monroe. Just because you wanna keep Clarke in the dark doesn’t mean I have to be ok with you breaking my sister’s heart.” Turning to Clarke she simply said “When you know the whole story you’ll understand, whether she tells you is upto her. But it’s not my place to say. Now I’m going to find my sister before she drinks herself into oblivion” Walking to the door she turned the handle pulling it towards her “If the twins need me, call me” She didn’t wait for a response, instead opening the door fully and walking through it, quietly closing it behind her.

 

Clarke looked at the door unsure of exactly what Lexa meant, seconds later, she removed her arm from around Octavia standing up and walking over to the front door. Looking through the window next to the door, she was about to go outside when Lexa’s car pulled out of the driveway. Turning back and looking at Octavia, seeing the upset look on her friends face. “What did she mean?”

 

“Nothing”

 

Clarke bit her tongue, almost literally in anger, taking a few steps forward she stood in front of Octavia, looking down at her best friend she firmly said “Bullshit Octavia…tell me what Lexa meant”

 

“Clarke I really don’t wanna do this right now…I just wanna go lay with my son” Octavia started standing up and going to walk past Clarke, only for Clarke to grab her wrist, forcing her to stop and turn around to face her. “Clarke, what the hell? Let me go”

 

“No, not until you tell me what the hell Lexa meant”

 

“Clarke, seriously let me go, it’s beginning to hurt”

 

“Believe me it’ll hurt more if you don’t start telling me what she meant”

 

“She didn’t mean anything Clarke….besides its’ none of your business”

 

“It’s one hundred percent my business if I nearly lost my family as a result of it”

 

“It has nothing to do with you and Nia’s lies”

 

“Really because it seems like it has to do with Monroe, and the reason I couldn’t tell Lexa you told me what Nia said, was because you were seeing Monroe”

 

“Ok fine…just let me the hell go”

 

“Fine, but don’t you dare walk away from me. My kids are sleeping upstairs and so is your son. If we wake them, I’m going to be very unhappy. And you won’t be staying in my house”

 

“I get it Clarke. Can we do this with a hot drink…and maybe a shot please?”

 

“Fine, let’s take this into the kitchen” Octavia nodded her head at Clarke’s words walking into the kitchen, closing followed by Clarke she could feel Clarke’s judgmental eyes during into her, and she knew that more judgement was to come especially with what she was about to tell her. Moving over to the kettle she noticed the look on Clarke’s face “I’m gonna tell you I just need a drink first” She honestly responded placing the kettle on, she heard Clarke disappear from the kitchen, reappearing later with a bottle of whiskey in her hand. Going about what she was doing, she made her and Clarke two coffees before carrying them over to the table where Clarke was now sat waiting for her. Sitting down opposite her angry best friend, she pushed the cup she made for Clarke across the table until it was in front of her. Gently reaching for the bottle, before she could grab it Clarke picked the bottle up, pouring herself a small amount into her coffee, she poured a small amount into Octavia’s “I may need more than that” Octavia added as she took a small sip of the coffee.

 

“Your two year old is sleeping upstairs, when he wakes up you need to be thinking clear. Because he will wake up at some point”

 

“I know he will, he’ll begin to miss Raven and then wake up wanting his Mama hugs, and because of me he won’t be able to get them”

 

“Enough of the self-pity party O, tell me what Lexa was talking about”

 

“Why the hell do you care Clarke? I’m a bad person isn’t that enough to know”

 

“Seriously Octavia, don’t make me call Lexa and ask her myself because believe me she’s angrier than you realise”

 

“Fine, whatever, it’s not like anything I do will every change what happened or make Raven forgive me”

 

“Raven will come around just give her time”

 

“No she won’t….she’s angry because this isn’t the first time I lied about something important. She forgave me once, she isn’t going to do it again”

 

“Seriously Octavia what are you talking about?”

 

“I cheated on her”


	17. I Cheated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa goes to Raven's aid. Octavia tells Clarke the full story behind Raven's anger

** Chapter Seventeen-I Cheated **

Clarke looked at Octavia her mouth slightly hanging open as the words Octavia had just said registered in her head, she knew Octavia had kissed Monroe but something about the way Octavia had said she cheated that made her think there was more to it. Over the years her and Lexa had, had their problems but she’d never once seen a sign that Raven and Octavia had, had troubles or that Octavia had actually cheated on Raven. Blinking her eyes open and shut a few times, she was brought out of her daze when she heard Olivia’s voice calling out for her. Standing up she locked eyes with Octavia unsure what to say to her best friend, turning around she walked up the stairs quickly until she was at the top of the stairs, finding Olivia with her hands gripping onto the bars of the child gate, once she was on the top step. Unlocking the gate opening it before lifting her daughter off the ground and onto her chest, closing the gate behind her as Olivia gently gripped onto her. “What’s wrong princess?” She softly asked part of her wanting to go back downstairs and hear what Octavia had to say.

 

“I had a bad dream Mommy”

 

“You did baby?” Olivia nodded her head into her Mommy’s shoulder “Ok, well me and you are going to lay down and the bad dreams will be all gone” Clarke softly said as she entered her bedroom.

 

“No Mommy”

 

“Why not baby?”

 

“I want to stay awake; I don’t like the bad dreams anymore”

 

“I know you don’t baby but you have to go to sleep”

 

“Noooooo Mommy please” Olivia cried out her body shaking softly as tears escaped her eyes and she held on a little tighter to Clarke

 

“Hey hey, it’s ok baby…” Walking up to her bed she found her over the ear headphones, looking down at her daughter she softly added “You can come downstairs with Mommy, but me and Aunt Octavia are talking so you can listen to some music on this, whilst you go back to sleep….with Mommy holding you, ok?”

 

“Ok but don’t let go Mommy”

 

“I won’t princess”

 

“Mommy left go in my bad dream”

 

“I did?” Olivia nodded her head at the question “Well...” Clarke started before walking around her bed, carefully leaning down she opened the ottoman at the end of the bed opening it, she pulled out a pink blanket wrapping it around her daughter and one of her arms. “Now Mommy can’t let go, because you’re all tucked into Mommy” She smiled at the happy and content smile that graced her daughter’s face. Carrying Olivia out of the bedroom, she continued down the stairs, opening and closing the gate as she did so. Reaching the Living room, she quickly grabbed her phone from the couch, before returning to the kitchen turning off some of the lights she walked over to the table, sitting down opposite Octavia, who had more tears covering her face. “Sorry O, my baby girl here had a bad dream,” Clarke softly said getting a nod in response from Octavia. Looking down at Olivia, Clarke placed the headphones over her daughter’s ears, she smiled at her daughter, “What would you like to listen to princess?”

 

“Can I listen to Mama’s music?”

 

“I don’t think I have Mama’s new music, but I can let you listen to some old stuff ok?” Olivia nodded her head at the question as she leant against her Mommy more, adjusting her head so the headphones stayed on and she was still leaning against her Mommy’s chest. Pulling her phone out of her pocket Clarke unlocked it, going into her music she pulled up the playlist marked Lexa’s songs. Smiling at the name, she went through the songs making sure none of them was not child friendly. After checking the playlist, she pressed play making sure the volume wasn't too high she placed a gentle kiss on Olivia’s head before turning her attention to Octavia “Where were we?”

 

“I just told you I cheated on Raven”

 

“Yeah you did…so that….when did it happen?”

 

“When we were in high school, our last year”

 

“With who?” Clarke asked as she looked down at Olivia, seeing her daughter had her eyes closed and a small smile on her face as the music played. Looking back up at Octavia, Clarke hoped she wasn’t about to hear the name she was thinking.

 

“It was Monroe”

 

“You’ve got to be kidding me”

 

“I wish I was”

 

“And when you say cheating, what do you mean?”

 

“Cheating is cheating Clarke”

 

“I know that, but there are different kinds we both know that.”

 

“We went all the way”

 

“I thought you’d only ever been with two people, one man and Raven”

 

“Well you can make that two women and one man,” Octavia added as she drank her whiskey and coffee. Closing her eyes for a second she tried to force the tears to stay inside her eyes, she was unsuccessful when tears ran down her cheeks forcing her to wipe them away.

 

“I don’t get it O, you and Raven were so in love, how could you cheat on her?”

 

“I don’t know ok, Lincoln came back and she was jealous about me and him hanging out, she thought I was gonna sleep with him again”

 

“He was really touchy feely with you O”

 

“I know he was but I didn’t think of him like that anymore, all I could think of every single day was Raven, every moment of the day she was in my mind. Even before we got together she was all I thought about, she was actually the reason I broke up with Lincoln.”

 

“Then why the hell would you sleep with Monroe?”

 

“I don’t know Clarke, me and Raven had this really bad argument and she stormed off before we could talk things through. I went to art class and you were too busy drawing a picture for Lexa to talk to me, but Monroe, she was there for me”

 

“I bet she was”

 

“Not like that Clarke, well not a first anyway….she asked me if I wanted to hang out after school and I said yes”

 

“And you just jumped into bed with her?”

 

“No, I tried calling Raven the whole day, I didn’t know she’d been hurt during gym class, I thought she was just ignoring me so I went to hang out with Monroe. We started chatting and the next thing I know we were having sex. I knew it was wrong but all I could think of was Raven breaking up with me for something I didn’t do”

 

“So you wanted her to have a real reason?”

 

“Kind of yeah…it’s stupid I know that but at that moment I wanted to feel loved, that was the first time she’d looked at me like she hated me”

 

“She could never hate you O, you know that”

 

“Maybe not before but she does now”

 

“If she can forgive you once, maybe she’ll forgive you again, as long as it was only a kiss”

 

“It was Clarke, I wouldn’t do that again. She broke up with me the first time, we didn’t speak for over a week and it was the worst two weeks of my life”

 

“I didn’t know you two broke up”

 

“Yeah, she ended it with me about a month later when I told her about me and Monroe that was about two months before prom.”

 

“Hang on, that was around the time Lexa got into a fight with Monroe was that because of you and Monroe sleeping together?”

 

“Yes, Raven got drunk the night I told her and Lexa found her. The morning after Raven told Lexa everything and the next time we were in school, she ripped into me. Monroe saw and tried to defend me…and Lexa went off at her, Monroe started bad mouthing Raven, saying it was all her fault and Lexa snapped”

 

“She got suspended for that, she could have lost her university scholarship”

 

“I know ok, I told Principal Jaha it was my fault, I didn’t tell him why but Monroe spoke to him as well and told him that it was her fault”

 

“How noble of her” Clarke sarcastically let out, looking down at Olivia, smiling at the sleeping image of her daughter resting against her chest. She was now thankful for her daughter waking up, because if she was honest with herself she wasn’t sure she’d have been able to remain completely calm with everything she was hearing right now. Looking back up and at her friend, she waited for Octavia to speak again:

 

“She knew she was in the wrong Clarke”

 

“Are you seriously sitting her defending your dirty little secret?”

 

“No, I’m not Clarke not in any way I swear.”

 

“It sounds a lot like you are”

 

“I’m not, I hate what I did, and I don’t think Monroe and Lexa’s fight was ok. Not by any means, I’m just trying to explain everything to you”

 

“Fine, keep going. So when did Raven forgive you?”

 

“Nearly two weeks later, we got paired together on a project and she tried to avoid me as much as possible. Until I turned up at her house, with Anya and Gustus’ permission, they told me she would be home alone and I used the project as an excuse and went there. After some persuasion, she let me in, and I didn’t stop bringing it up until she actually spoke back. We cleared the air and we kissed….she pulled away and I thought she was going to kick me out, but instead she told me she wanted to forgive me”

 

“What happened after?”

 

“We talked, I cried…a lot, and then she told me that we could work it out on the condition that I had nothing to do with Monroe, I told her it’d never happen no matter what and she finally relented and said that me and Monroe could stay friends as long as we weren’t left alone at any time.”

 

“And that was it?”

 

“Nope, she was really jealous over the next month. Always checking my phone making sure I was going where I said I was. Then I told her it was enough, she broke down and told me how much I’d hurt her, she told how she wanted to cheat on me but she couldn’t”. Octavia paused as the memory flashed in her head, wiping the fresh tears from her cheeks she continued, “I told her that I was sorry, I even got on my knees, she pulled me back up almost instantly and told me that she wanted to start again. That she wanted to forget and move on with our lives, that was actually the first time she told me she wanted to marry me one day” Taking another sip of her coffee she took another breath “Hearing her say that made me realise exactly how much I needed her, and just how stupid I’d been. I don’t know how I was lucky enough for her to forgive me but she did.”

 

“And you’ve been fine since then?”

 

“Yeah, we talked a lot that night; about everything we wanted in the future as well as what had happened between us. We both agreed we wanted to forget about it, I told her how she made me feel compared to Lincoln, how nothing compared to how I felt when she would walk in the room, or just smile at me. I told her nobody ever made me feel that….I even told her all about me and Monroe sleeping together, how she couldn’t make me…” Looking down at her niece sitting on Clarke’s lap she decided not to be too graphic “How she couldn’t please me properly, I even told her how wrong it felt kissing someone that wasn’t her. And we agreed not to talk about it anymore, we agreed that nobody other than me, her, Lexa and Monroe would know what happened. Lexa wanted to tell you but Raven made her promise not to say anything, and she agreed it wasn’t her place to reveal our secrets. She talked to Monroe, with Lexa there, and Monroe agreed to keep quiet and to not be alone in a room with me”

 

“So what changed for you to break that promise after years of keeping it?”

 

“I told you, I was feeling vulnerable after Zachary was born and I wanted to feel like me again. So Monroe and me started hanging out without anyone knowing or anyone else being there. It felt good to just be me again, she didn’t treat me like a mother or like I was someone different because I’d had a child. I just wanted to feel like that old me”

 

“And she did that for you?”

 

“Yes. She would call me pretty; tell me I looked perfect like not a single day had passed since we were in High School. She made me feel wanted.”

 

“Raven did as well; maybe you just didn’t see it”

 

“There was nothing to see Clarke; she was working all the time. Making sure the company was getting record deals, I was struggling to keep going with Zachary, he was only three weeks old and she was back at work. I felt so alone. I just needed someone. Yeah she changed after Monroe kissed me, but it was still hard. Just hanging out with Monroe eased that for me, it made it a little easier to still be me but be a Mom as well.”

 

“Why didn’t you come to me O?”

 

“Because you were busy with the twins, and I didn’t wanna ruin your perfect life”

 

“Perfect?”

 

“Yeah, I don’t mean it in a bad way Clarke. But we always talked about what your perfect life would be, and ever since you met Lexa, you’ve always said that your perfect life would be to marry her, buy your own house and to have kids. And you’ve got that all.”

 

“If you’d have come to me, you’d have known how much Raven was struggling to O”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“I probably shouldn’t tell you this but at the time your talking about Lexa would come home, with a tear stained shirt because Raven had been literally crying on her shoulder for most of the day. She saw you were struggling, but everytime she tried to hold you or kiss you, or to even show you some affection you’d close off completely. She didn’t know how to help you, she told Lexa how much she was struggling, everyday Lexa would comfort her and tell her it would be ok. She’d watch as Raven wrote out everything she felt into a song, tears rushing from her eyes because she couldn’t work out how to help you”

 

“She wrote a song for me?”

 

“Yeah, well she wrote a few for you at that time but this one got picked up by Polydor Records, and it became a massive hit which is what lead to her and Lexa working with Ed Sheeran and Warner Music Group”

 

“What is the song?”

 

“O I can’t tell you ok. But ask her, if she tells you then maybe you can listen to it and you’ll get how much she was trying and struggling”

 

“What a coincidence you’re defending her, but you have no proof”

 

“Whatever Octavia, I’ve heard the song. And even more I’ve heard the stories, from Lexa and from Raven”

 

“I don’t believe you”

 

“You don’t have to Octavia, and quite frankly I don’t give a damn whether or not you do. Your my best friend my word should be enough but hey that’s you all over” Clarke huffed out, carefully standing up holding Olivia to her chest as she left the room and walked into the living room walking over to the couch and sitting herself carefully down on the couch, careful not to disturb her daughter. As she made herself comfortable trying to ignore the anger she was feeling towards her best friend right now. As Octavia entered the living room walking towards her and sitting on the opposite end of the couch to Clarke, letting out a breath Clarke closed her eyes resting her head against the back of the couch.

 

“I’m sorry Clarke…this is just a lot for me”

 

“Welcome to my world”

 

“It’s not the same though is it Clarke”

 

“No it’s not. I was on Raven’s side of this; well at least I thought I was”

 

“I know your angry ok, and I’m so sorry”

 

“Angry doesn’t even cover it Octavia, all of this could have been avoided if you’d just been honest. I’ve lost a year of being a family, and all you can say is I don’t have proof of a song”

 

“I’m sorry ok…” Octavia pleaded again wiping her cheeks of more tears “I can’t stop thinking about how much I’ve fucked up, and I hate myself for it. I didn’t want Monroe to kiss me, I didn’t want anything but to feel normal and now I’ve probably lost my wife and no doubt soon I’ll lose my son”

 

“Stop it O….the only way you can fix this is by owning up to everything you’ve done wrong. You need to talk to Raven and tell her what you were feeling. And promise her that you won’t hide how your feeling from her….You’re not the sole reason me and Lexa were apart for a year…” Seeing the look on Octavia’s face Clarke explained further “I never talked to her, I never asked if it was true, I just assumed it was. I didn’t talk to you about the details, if I had then me and Lexa would have never broken up and my kids wouldn’t be scared their Mama won’t come back when she leaves. I clammed up because I thought I deserved to be cheated on, I didn’t talk to her and all of this has happened as a result. Sometimes O we have to stand up and own up to our mistakes. The only way Raven is gonna think about forgiving you is if your honest, you have to tell her why you kept seeing Monroe, your gonna have to tell her everytime it happened and then you have to hope that she believes you, and more importantly that she forgives you. But the only way you can even start that is to be one hundred percent honest with her.”

 

“Your right”

 

“Make her be honest with you as well, I’m guessing neither of you have talked about the rough patch you had after Zachary was born.” Octavia shook her head at Clarke’s words “Do you know that when I had the twins me and Lexa didn’t get a decent night’s sleep for the first two months at least.” Seeing the confused look on Octavia’s face Clarke continued, “I’m sorry to break it to you but Zachary wasn’t the first baby in history to sleep through the night…. Raven would wake up before you and most days she’d stay up all night making sure that he went back to sleep, and that his nappy was fresh or he got a bottle when he needed it. She would even clean the house sometimes. She did that so when you woke up you wouldn’t have to worry about doing anything”

 

“She did all that?”

 

“Yeah she did. She thought it’d take the pressure off you”

 

“She did, thinking about it now. It was a little weird that he slept through, she wasn’t pretending to be tired was she?”

 

“No” Clarke watched as more tears escaped Octavia’s eyes rushing down her cheeks as her best friend finally realised exactly what had been going on with Raven at the time she was feeling at her most alone. Throwing her head back, Octavia let the sadness take her over, had she really just ruined everything with Raven because of some stupid miscommunication.

* * *

 

  **Twin Records-22:00**

Lexa had driven around Mission Hill to every single bar she knew Raven went to; there had been no sign of her at any of the bars. After she’d arrived at the last one, she got back in her car, beginning to think about where her twin sister could be then it popped into her head, Raven had made a promise to her that she wouldn’t drink herself stupid in any bar if her and Octavia had a fight. A half smile creeped onto her face as she realised her sister had given herself an out, soon enough the smile fell from her face as she changed direction turning her car, and driving in the direction of the studio she owned with her sister. She pulled into the car park she parked in her usual spot seeing Raven’s car parked up in Raven’s usual space. Turning the engine off she climbed out of the car, locking the car as she closed the door she placed the keys in her pocket walking towards the studio. As she’d reached the door she heard music come from inside, entering her code the door unlocked and she walked inside closing the door properly behind her. Walking through the studio halls until she found their private studio, where just as she had guessed the music was coming from, opening the door she came across the image of an emotional and clearly drunk Raven sitting on one of the couches, a half drunk bottle of whiskey in her hand as her head swayed slightly to the music. Closing the studio door, she walked further into the room; clearing her throat, she gained Raven’s attention:

 

“Rae”

 

Hearing her name being called Raven swung her head in the direction of the voice, seeing her twin sister standing in the doorway she let out a massive groan, throwing herself to her left, lying face down on the couch her right hand keeping a firm grip on to the bottle of whiskey she had drunk. Continuing to groan into the cushions underneath her face, she half turned shouting, “GO AWAY LEXA”

 

“No such luck Raven” Lexa firmly added, walking over to the control panel she turned the volume of the music down before turning and walking back to where she had been stood previously near the door.

 

“Oh Shit, your upset…you don’t usually Raven me”

 

“I’m not upset I’m worried Rae, this isn’t a smart idea”

 

“Smart…” Raven pushed herself up on the couch letting out a breath before she drunkenly turned her head looking at her twin. Drunkenly she brought her hand and the bottle into the air pointing at her sister “Smart isn’t something I partake in Lex”

 

“Don’t talk like that Rae”

 

“Just stop Lexa….you sound just like Aunt Anya, always talking about drink wasn’t Mom but it was wasn’t it” Lexa moved a little closer to her sister sitting on the arm of the couch Raven was sitting on, not saying a word to her sister she just looked at her. “I’m not our Mom”

 

“I know you’re not Rae”

 

“Maybe it’s genetic, like I am genetically made to fuck up in life. Maybe I’ll end up like Mom with four kids that hate me because I’m a complete and utter failure”

 

“You’re not a failure Rae and your nothing like our mother”

 

“You know sometimes I wish I could be like Dad, I wish I could cheat on her and get her back but I can’t” Raven continued to drunkenly rambled, her hand moving side to side with almost every word she said. “Why did I have to be the dumb twin, I suck so bad it’s almost hilarious”

 

“You’re not dumb Raven”

 

“You have to say that because you’re my twin”

 

“No I don’t, you’re not dumb. You’re caring, loving and faithful, and above everything else you’re an amazing wife and mother”

 

“Sure I am. I’m such a great wife and person that my wife would rather hang out with someone she cheated on me with, even though I hate her and asked her not to...she’s just such a bitch”

 

“You don’t mean that Rae, Octavia isn’t a bitch and you know that”

 

“Not Octavia, Monroe is a bitch…I could never think she was a bitch” Taking another swig out of the bottle of whiskey Raven continued “I wish I could hate her, maybe it would take all the pain away, maybe it’d be easier to move on. To finally end all of this Bullshit”

 

“Rae you don’t mean that, you love Octavia, and I know she lied to you but…”

 

“What about you Lexa?”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“You lied to me to” She started standing up turning drunkenly to look at her twin, pointing at her again this time taking a swig of the bottle before putting it on the ground and moving aggressively towards Lexa. “You know it HURTS SO MUCH knowing that she lied BUT YOU, you’re my FAMILY my TWIN you’re not meant to lie to me Lex…NOT YOU…You’re meant to be the ONLY PERSON I CAN TRUST”. Raven angrily let out lunging forward and grabbing Lexa’s shirt forcing Lexa to stand up so she didn’t fall off the arm of the chair. “LOOK AT YOU BEING ALL BIG SISTER, PRETENDING YOUR GIVE A DAMN”

 

“Ok, you wanna hit me Raven; I’ll take it punch me, kick me, whatever it takes you can throw it at me if it makes you feel better, come on I’ll take it.” Lexa responded seeing the rage bubbling inside her sister’s eyes. Feeling Raven’s hands gripping tighter on her clothing “Do it…hit me Raven….come on imagine I’m Monroe, get me back for lying to you……HIT ME” Not needing any further invitation Raven pulled her back punching Lexa hard in the stomach sending her sister backwards and onto the floor. As she hit the floor, Lexa gasped for air, slightly shocked at how much force her sister had put into the punch. Laying on the floor Lexa looked up at the ceiling trying to regain her breathing. Once she did, she sat up looking across the room, seeing Raven sitting on the couch bent over her body shaking softly as she sobbed out. Without a second thought, Lexa stood up wincing slightly as she moved across the studio sitting herself down on the couch next to Raven, wrapping her left arm around her sister she pulled Raven towards her. Raven collapsed against her sister’s chest, letting her emotions out as she moved her hands to grip onto her sister’s shirt.

 

“I’m sorry Lex,” Raven cried into her sister’s chest as she continued to sob.

 

“Shhhh, It’s ok Rae…I promise it’s going to be ok” Lexa soothingly returned rubbing gentle circles on Raven’s back, as she began to feel her sister’s tears wetting her shirt. Wrapping her arms even more around her sister’s chest holding her close, like she’d done the last time Raven had broken down about Octavia, and just like she did when they were younger and their mom would drink herself into oblivion then argue and fight with her latest boyfriend.

 

An hour or two passed by and Raven’s crying had stopped the music had stopped playing, but still she stayed leaning against her sisters chest, the drink beginning to cloud her mind stopping her from thinking about what Octavia had done. Lexa knew what was going on in her sister’s mind; she’d seen Raven go through this before more than once in fact. And every single time she hated seeing her sister like this, but this time it seemed to be worse than the last times, Raven never usually drank herself stupid with whiskey it was usually beer she’d drink. She knew this meant Raven wanted to get drunk quicker. Knowing how her sister’s mind worked she knew what was coming next, Raven was going to go into shut down pack her things and leave the house she shared with Octavia. And whilst she understood why Raven wanted to leave the house, now things were different now there was Zachary this small human that needed her help going through life. But she also knew now wasn’t the right time to be lecturing her sister, she needed to give her time to process.

 

“Come on Rae, time to get you out of here” Raven didn’t respond to her sister she instead let Lexa lift her off the couch. As she stood up the blood rushed to her head, making her grip onto Lexa a little more. Keeping hold of Raven, Lexa leant forward turning of the control panel, watching until the light went off. Once the light was off Lexa made sure all the switches that needed to be off were exactly that. Shifting Raven’s body slightly so she took most of her sister’s weight, walking to the door she pulled it open dragging her sister through the door, turning the light off as she held the door open with her back. Carrying Raven out of the door allowing it to shut and lock behind her, slowly but surely they made their way back to Lexa’s car as Raven mumbled numerous sentences to her sister. Once they go to the car, Lexa lifted Raven into the back seat of the car, not wanting to put her in the front passenger’s seat in case Raven needed to throw up or in case she went into a rage again. Once she’d managed to get Raven’s seatbelt on she climbed into the driver’s seat, turning on the ignition she placed her own seatbelt on before pulling out of the car park. As she was driving, Raven began talking about Octavia, telling her how much she hated her and Monroe, she then went on to say how she wanted to get her stuff from their house, she kept rambling on and on about Octavia and all things Octavia related. After ten minutes of driving and Raven’s rambling, Lexa decided to stop by her and Clarke’s house, not only to check in on Clarke and the twins but also to grab Raven’s spare keys so she could get some of Raven’s things. Parking up in her usual spot she told her sister to stay in the car, Raven didn’t arguing but instead laid herself down across the back seat, humming at her sister.

 

Getting out of the car, Lexa placed her keys in her jacket pocket walking to the front door; once she was at the door, she removed her house keys from her left hand side pocket. Placing the key in the lock and opening the door quietly. As she walked into the living room, she came across Octavia and Clarke both sitting on either end of the couch; Clarke had Olivia sitting on her lap wrapped up in a blanket she noticed the headphones over her daughter’s ears. Octavia was sat on the end of the couch closest to the door Zachary curled up on her lap with a light blue blanket covering part of his body. Both of the older women looked at Lexa, silently wondering what she was doing back. Walking further into the room, Lexa walked over to Clarke gently stroking Olivia’s loose hair smiling down at Clarke as the blonde spoke:

 

“How comes your back?”

 

“That’s how it is huh?”

 

“No I just…”

 

“I’m joking Clarke….Raven’s in the car. I just came to get the spare keys for her place”

 

“What?” Octavia interjected, sitting herself up and instantly regretting speaking as loud as she had, as Zachary moved against her chest his small hands moving to rub his face. “She’s outside”

 

“Yes, but she doesn’t wanna see you O”

 

“But how can I explain everything if she won’t see me”

 

“She doesn’t want to talk right now, and even more she isn’t in a state to talk right now” Without a word, Lexa walked into the kitchen, flicking on the switch of the kettle waiting for it boil. Once it had she went about making a coffee hoping that it would sober Raven up whilst she looked for the keys to her sister place. When the coffee was made, she walked to the door opening it and quickly walking out to the car opening the backseat door, as the door opened Raven peaked her head up. “Here, drink this and don’t you dare spill any of it” Raven groaned and hummed sitting herself up looking at her sister before talking the cup instantly regretting it when she felt the heat from the cup. Seeing the look, Lexa let out a small laugh before pulling down the tray she had on the back of the seat, taking the cup from her sister placing it on the tray. “Don’t down it ok?” Raven nodded her head at the question before resting it against the headrest behind her, closing her eyes and breathing slowly. “Good, now just relax, give it time to cool then drink it slowly and don’t you dare throw up in my car”

 

“Yeah yeah....whatever Alexa”

 

“Just do as your told Raven,” Lexa firmly added seeing the small smile that graced her sister face, it only lasted for a second but she saw it. Closing the door quietly she walked back into the house closing the door quietly behind her. Looking over at Clarke, she noticed the amused and slightly confused look on the blonde’s face “Sorry, I wanted Rae to have a coffee before I take her back.” Walking back over to Clarke, she sat down next to her softly asking, “How come Liv is down here?”

 

“She had a bad dream about me leaving, I tried to put her back to bed but she wanted to stay with me”

 

“Poor baby”

 

“Yeah, I didn’t want to just put her back in her room. She would have got really upset”

 

“You did the right thing; sometimes we all need a little comfort”

 

“We do…anyway she’s been out for about two hours now, and her grips loosened a little so I’ll take her upstairs”

 

“I’ll take her” Lexa offered leaning into Clarke and carefully removing their daughter from Clarke’s chest, turning Olivia quickly so she was against her chest hoping she wouldn’t wake up. Standing herself up she went to walk up the stairs only to be stopped in her tracks by Clarke’s lowered voice.

 

“Can you put her in our room please?”

 

“Sure” Lexa smiled before continuing to walk up the stairs, until she reached the top. Within two minutes, she’d successfully placed Olivia in her and Clarke’s bed. Returning to the living room, she noticed Octavia’s attention was completely on the window behind where she was sitting. Ignoring her urge to have a go at Octavia she walked over and sat down next to Clarke, softly smiling at her wife as Clarke took a hold of her hand “How was your talk?”

 

“Terrible but good. She told me about her and Monroe sleeping together in High School”

 

“So she told you why I had a fight with Monroe?”

 

“She did”

 

“Look, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I wanted to and I hated not saying anything, but I couldn’t….”

 

“Without telling me why…I know. And I’m ok with it you didn’t lie to me. You just kept someone else’s secret”

 

“And that’s not technically lie?”

 

“No, not for you. I know if it was important, you’d have told me. But you did something for and to protect your sister, so it’s fine” As Lexa looked at her she smiled almost mischievously at her, causing Lexa to raise her eyebrow at her “You can make it upto me if you want?”

 

“Oh yeah, how so?”

 

“Well there’s two steps to it though”

 

“Ok, I’m all ears. What are these two steps?”

 

“Step one is: Kiss me….and Step two is...”

 

Before Clarke could finish her sentence, Lexa had leant forward connecting their lips gently, taking Clarke slightly by surprise, within a second Clarke kissed Lexa back, pulling back after a few seconds fully aware that Octavia was still in the room with them. Biting her bottom lip softly she looked into Lexa’s eyes, also seeing the smirk on Lexa’s face:

 

“Sorry I got caught up in Step One”

 

“Of course you did” Clarke smirked gently gripping onto Lexa’s hand “As I was saying….Step Two, is you take me out to dinner Friday night”

 

“This Friday?” When Clarke nodded her head, Lexa’s thoughts went straight to her twin sister sitting outside in her car trying to sober herself up. Her face contorted slightly as she hoped Clarke wouldn’t take what she was about to say the wrong way. “I’m not sure Clarke…” Seeing the panic and upset creeping into Clarke’s expression, she quickly continued, “It’s not that I don’t want to, I just don’t know how Raven’s gonna be. If she’s still struggling then she’ll need me. I don’t wanna say yes and then have to cancel on you”

 

“Ok. I can deal with that….how about we say if everything’s ok on Friday then we can go out, and if not then we can just invite Raven here and we can all chill and watch a film. How does that sound?”

 

“Perfect. Thank you”

 

“You’re welcome” Clarke responded leaning forward capturing Lexa’s lips with her own with a quick kiss before pulling back smiling, “Sealed with a kiss, so you can’t back out”

 

“I wouldn’t dream of it” Lexa smiled, her mind again returning to her sister, looking back to Clarke “Do you know where the spare keys are?” Clarke nodded standing up and walking over to the draw at the bottom of where they and everyone else would hang their jackets and coats. Opening the drawer, she pulled out a set of house keys with a Red rectangular keyring that said ‘ _Raven & Octavia_’ written on it. She was about to walk back over to Lexa, she turned finding the brunette woman in front of her, making her stop her movements instantly. She handed the keys to Lexa, as their hands touched Lexa softly said “Thank you”

 

“You’re welcome….um call me later on yeah? Just to update me on how she is”

 

“Sure…I’ll call you as long as it isn’t too late”

 

“It doesn’t matter what time it is just text first ok?”

 

“Ok…I’ll talk to you later then” Lexa softly responded kissing Clarke quickly before moving and opening the door, as the door open she came across the image of her sister. Standing at the door holding her now empty cup of coffee, Lexa could tell that her sister was much more sober than twenty minutes ago. Looking at Raven, she noticed her sisters eyes had roamed around the room and found Octavia sitting on the couch holding their son. “You ok Rae?”

 

At the mention of Raven’s name, Octavia’s head spun around the action unintentionally waking up Zachary. Before she could say anything to Raven, Zachary began to cry against her chest, the sounds forcing her to stand and try and sooth her son. As she did, she heard Raven speak in the background:

 

“I just need the toilet, and I thought I’d bring this back as well,” She explained smiling at her sister, forcing herself to ignore her son’s cries. Handing the cup to Clarke, she walked between Clarke and Lexa continuing up the stairs to use the toilet. Nobody said a word as they waited for Raven to return, minutes later Raven returned about to walk out of the door when Zachary’s cries forced her to stop as he called out:

 

“Mama”

 

Unable to ignore her son’s cries for her she walked across the room stopping next to Octavia, who was still rocking their son in her arms. Leaning down she brought her left hand up to gently stroke her son’s hair “It’s ok baby boy, Mama’s here” Turning his head in her direction his face lit up as he saw her. The sight of her son’s smile sobering her up even more than the coffee had done. She smiled more as her son reached his arms out for her, seeing the look of hesitation on Octavia’s face she moved to the couch sitting down on the couch. “I won’t drop him” She coldly added knowing exactly what her wife was thinking, as Zachary wriggled more in Octavia’s arms she walked over sitting down next to Raven and letting their son climb onto Raven’s lap. “Hey baby,” She cooed at him as he gave her a toothy grin, laughing as he said:

 

“Coffee”

 

“Yeah Mama had a coffee”

 

“Coffee nice”

 

“For adults yes, but no coffee for my little king”

 

“No”

 

“Why are you awake so late Mister?”

 

“Miss you”

 

“But I haven’t been anywhere”

 

“Mama shout”

 

“I know I did baby, I’m sorry, but no more shouting. So you can go back to sleep”

 

“Mama Sleep too”

 

“Yes. But Mama won’t be here in the morning….but I’ll see you really soon after”

 

“Mama working”

 

“Yeah Mama will be working. So are you gonna be a good boy and go to sleep for Mommy?”

 

“Yes”

 

“Good boy, now go back to Mommy and get some sleep Mister” She smiled kissing him on the cheek softly. When Zachary pursed his lips at her, wanting a Mama kiss as he called it, she kissed him again on the cheek this time placing numerous kisses on his cheek “No Mama kisses right now, but you can have loads of Mama Kisses tomorrow”

 

“Coffee bad”

 

“Exactly….such a smart little boy”

 

“Smart like Mama”

 

“Exactly” She added kissing him one more time before lifting her son in the air and handing him to Octavia, standing up she waited as Octavia stood up with Zachary walking to the stairs. Walking up them and not looking back at Raven, not wanting to cry with her son in her arms. Once Octavia was out of sight Raven stood up opening, the door as tears rushed down her cheeks “I’ll wait in the car” She let out before the heartbreak of seeing Octavia again and having to walk away from her son, got to her.

 

“Raven” Lexa called out watching as her sister walked quickly to the car opening and closing the door. Turning to look at Clarke she softly said “Can you tell Octavia that Raven’s gonna stay with me at my apartment for a while, Octavia and Zachary can go back home”

 

“I’ll tell her”

 

“I better go, she needs me”

 

“Ok, make sure you call me”

 

“I will boss lady” Lexa affectionately responded leaning forward kissing Clarke softly before pulling back, winking at Clarke then heading out the door and towards the car her sister was sitting in. As she reached the driver’s door, she notices Clarke standing at the door, smiling at the Blonde she climbs into the driver’s seat signalling for Clarke to close the door, she wasn’t surprised when Clarke didn’t close the door but instead motioned for her to drive. Turning the ignition on Lexa reversed the car out of the driveway, waving at Clarke as she pulled off and drove in the direction of her apartment and Raven and Octavia’s house.

 

Lexa drove to her sister’s house every now and then looking at her sister in the rear view mirror she noticed the upset and zoned out expression on her twin sisters face. Deciding not to say a word, she drove all the way to Raven and Octavia’s house, pulling up in their driveway she back at her sister watching as Raven climbed out of the back seat, climbing out of the car knowing Raven’s keys were in her car, which was in the studio car park, she walked behind her sister. Pulling the spare key out of her jacket pocket, placing the key in the door unlocking the door and opening it for Raven. Raven quickly walked into the house rushing up the stairs and into her and Octavia’s bedroom. Lexa debated doing up the stairs to help Raven but decided staying downstairs was a better idea. Looking around the room, she noticed signs that someone had thrown pieces of furniture; she noticed a smashed mug on the floor, a smashed plate not too far from it on the floor, a small amount of food coating a portion of the floor. Walking into the kitchen, she grabbed a dustpan and brush along with a cloth, walking back into the living room she went about cleaning the living room of the broken crockery (tableware) and wiping the floor of the food that covered it. Just as she was finished, Raven came down the stairs with a suitcase in her right hand, her own leather jacket in her left hand. Quickly walking into the kitchen Lexa placed the items she was using back in their rightful places, before returning to where her sister was. Opening the door Raven walked out to the car, still not saying a word to Lexa. Again, she followed her sister, locking the door to the house as she exited it she walked back to the car climbing in and starting the ignition again. Pulling out of Raven and Octavia’s driveway, she continued the short distance drive to her apartment.

 

Another twenty minutes of silence went by without a word between them. As she pulled up in the apartment car park, she looked back at Raven seeing she was still awake; parking up she sent her sister a soft smile before turning off the ignition and climbing out of the car. Opening the door for Raven, she grabbed the suitcase from her sister’s hand, once Raven was out of the car she closed the door locking the car before walking towards the stairs that lead to her apartment. Looking back, she noticed Raven following her, turning her attention back in front of her she walked until she was at her apartment door. Placing her key into the lock, she opened the door, holding it open for her sister as she walked into the apartment, closing the door behind them she placed the latch and chain on the door before placing Raven’s bag on the floor, looking up at her sister she softly said:

 

“You can take my bedroom”

 

“What about you?”

 

“I’ll be fine in the twin’s bedroom”

 

“Ok” Raven simply responded picking up the suitcase she had packed, carrying it off she walked towards Lexa’s room without another word to her twin. Not wanting to disturb Raven or upset her even more, Lexa didn’t say a word instead, she watched on until Raven was no longer in her sight.

 

Hearing the door to her bedroom close shut, Lexa made her way to the nearest couch to her, sitting down she relaxed against the couch, taking a deep breath in she pulled her phone out of her pocket not opening her eyes until the phone was on her lap. Slowly opening her eyes, she looked down at the screen, smiling at the screensaver of Olivia and Oscar playing outside with Zachary, a picture she’d taken the day before. Unlocking the scene she pulled up Clarke’s name, changing the contact name to **Boss Lady** laughing to herself at the nickname, she had a habit of changing the blonde’s contact name whenever she thought of another nickname. Seeing is was 22:45 at night, she wrote out a text message to Clarke: **You awake Boss Lady? xx** Smiling at the message she pressed send placing the phone back on her lap, it didn’t take long for Clarke to send her a message back: **Yes I am & Boss Lady Really? xxx **Smiling she pulled up Clarke’s contact again, pressing the call button she reached forward into the drawer on the side of the table, opening the drawer she pulled out her iphone headphones, plugging them into her iphone, placing the buds in her ears just as Clarke answered the phone.

 

Clarke instantly went into asking Lexa why she was calling her boss lady all of a sudden, Lexa naturally responded with a witty comment of ‘Your bossy and you a lady ergo Boss Lady’. Clarke quickly rebuffed the comment and they naturally feel into a playful banter for ten minutes, before Clarke broached the subject of Raven and how she was doing. Lexa told her everything, how Raven hadn’t said more than two sentences to her since they got in the car. She told Clarke all about what happened at the studio and Raven punching her, of course, Clarke wasn’t happy about Lexa being hit but she understood Raven’s upset and anger amongst everything that was going on. Lexa told her all about Raven drinking half a bottle of whiskey, and about what they talked about in the studio. She confessed to Clarke that she was scared because she wasn’t sure how to help her sister or whether she could be helped. Clarke reassured her that she just needed to give Raven time to process, and then just be there for her. They continued talking about Raven, then going onto Octavia and how much she’d messed up again. They went on to talk about whether they thought Raven would forgive Octavia for lying to her again, especially considering how upset Raven was neither of them was sure what Raven was going to do. After a while they agreed to talk about something else, talking about the twin’s, Clarke described how Olivia was laying heavily on her chest after having another nightmare and waking up not long before Lexa called. After about two hours of talking, they both let out yawns agreeing to end their conversation both needing to get some sleep after draining day they’d had. After a few goodbyes, Clarke hung up the phone. Standing herself up she walked towards her bedroom walking in seeing Raven was lying in bed seemingly asleep, she grabbed a pair of shorts and a t-shirt before quickly and quietly exiting the room, walking and entering the Twin’s bedroom. Ready to get some sleep after one hell of day and to prepare for what was going to come in the following days and weeks.


	18. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Olivia has a nightmare. Raven gets some time with Zachary

** Chapter Eighteen-Nightmares **

** 2:30am-Later that Morning **

Lexa was woken up from Olivia’s bed, where she was sleeping that night, to a loud vibrating noise coming from her right hand side. Squinting her eyes slightly looking up at the ceiling she turned onto her stomach, reaching her hand across and onto the bedside cabinet, her phone was resting next to a lamp. Feeling around until she found her phone, picking it up she moved it closer, squinting so she could see the name of the contact causing the vibrating on her phone. Seeing it was Clarke calling her she pressed on the screen sliding to the right to answer the call, slowly and sleepily she placed the phone to her ear, softly speaking:

 

“Hello”

 

“Lexa….Hey I didn’t know if you’d answer, I’m really sorry”

 

“It’s ok Clarke, what’s up?” Suddenly realising something could be wrong with the twins, Lexa shoot up in bed suddenly wide-awake with slight fear. “Are the twins ok? Are you ok?”

 

“We’re all fine Lex….well physically we are”

 

“Physically?”

 

“Olivia had another nightmare, she won’t stop crying and she keeps asking for you. I tried to calm her down but nothing I do works.” Clarke explained as Olivia’s cries became clearer in the background of the call. “I’m really sorry I called but I don’t know what else to do Lex”

 

“Clarke calm down. It’s ok, put her on the phone I’ll calm her down”

 

“Ok” Was all Clarke got out before the phone was moving away from her ear, as the phone moved Lexa heard Clarke’s voice soothing say “Olivia baby, Look Mama’s on the phone” It wasn’t even a second later that Lexa heard the phone shuffle softly and Olivia’s voice called out to her:

 

“Mama?”

 

“I’m here Princess”

 

“I’m scared Mama” Olivia cried down the line, her breathing heavy and quick. As well as the sound of the harsh breaths, Lexa could hear the pure fear in her daughter’s voice; the sound making her upset and slightly scared herself. Forcing herself to keep calm, now wanting to know exactly what had gotten her daughter so upset.

 

“Hey hey hey Princess, you gotta calm down for me ok?”

 

“Ok”

 

“Good girl, just breathe for Mama, nice and slow ok. Copy Mommy’s breathing for me” She soothed, hearing Olivia sniffle numerous times down the line before she heard her daughter’s breathing slow down, until she couldn’t hear the harsh breaths anymore. Once she thought Olivia’s breathing had slowed down enough she softly spoke again “Feel better?”

 

“Yes Mama”

 

“Good, are you sitting with Mommy?”

 

“Next to Mommy”

 

“Ok, Climb on Mommy’s lap and cuddle into Mommy’s chest”

 

“Ok Mama” Lexa listened as she heard the phone hit what she thought was the bed, then hearing a shuffle and Olivia’s breathing

 

“Are you on Mommy’s chest?”

 

“Yes Mama”

 

“Good, now make sure you’re comfortable”

 

“I am Mama…Mommy is comfy”

 

“Yes she is…now your gonna tell Mama all about your nightmare”

 

“I don’t want to Mama”

 

“I know you don’t baby, but sometimes if we talk about things we're scared of, it makes it easier to get over them whatever you’re scared of”

 

“But what if it’s real Mama”

 

“It’s not real princess, remember what I said about nightmares and bad dreams”

 

“They’re not real Mama”

 

“Exactly, so tell me what happened in your nightmare?”

 

“I was playing with Oscar and Zachary. And you and Auntie Rae were there”

 

“And what happened after that?”

 

“It got really dark, and Auntie Octavia came back, but Mommy didn’t”

 

“Why didn’t Mommy come back?”

 

“I don’t know Mama, but then the bad man came and everything went really dark…and I couldn’t see you anymore Mama, then I heard Mommy crying loudly”

 

“Could you see Mommy?”

 

“No, Mama. I couldn’t see her. Then there was loads of shouting and angry voices, and Mommy was mad at Aunt Octavia…then everyone was gone and I was on my own”

 

“Why was Mommy angry at Aunt Octavia?”

 

“I don’t know Mama, but everyone left me”

 

“Oh my poor baby” Clarke’s voice soothingly said in the background as Lexa guessed Clarke was gently rubbing their daughters back to calm her down. “It’s ok princess, it was only a nightmare” Not interrupting she let Clarke soothe their daughter on the other end of the phone.

 

“Don't like it Mommy, it’s scary”

 

“I know it is baby…but it’s over now”

 

“Not sleeping anymore”

 

“You have to sleep baby”

 

“NO”

 

“Excuse me young lady” Lexa interjected, her voice soft but firm. “I know your scared princess, but you can’t be rude or shout at Mommy, she’s just trying to help you”

 

“Sorry…..I’m sorry Mommy” Lexa heard Clarke say it was ok before hearing Clarke place a gentle kiss on Olivia’s head.

 

“Good girl, so what we’re going to do is you’re going to lay against Mommy, and she’s gonna hold you whilst you sleep. And once you sleep Mommy will keep all the bad dreams away”

 

“But that didn’t work Mama”

 

“It will this time, because Mommy is gonna hold on a little tighter this time”

 

“Ok….” Lexa heard a small shuffle over the phone before she heard Olivia’s small voice softly say, “Hold on tight please Mommy” Lexa heard Clarke affirm that she would hold on to their daughter. “Can you stay on the phone Mama?” Olivia softly asked down the phone.

 

“Of Course…in fact I have a better idea” Lexa smiled pulling the phone away from her ear, pressing the FaceTime button converting the call to a FaceTime call. Turning and placing on the lamp to her right so Olivia could see her face.

 

“What’s that noise Mama?”

 

“It’s the phone princess, look at it and press the green button and you’ll see a surprise”

 

“Ok Mama” Olivia sweetly answered pulling the phone from her ear and looking at the screen, her small hands struggling to hold the phone and press the button. Pushing herself up on her Mommy’s chest, she placed the phone on her Mommy’s chest pressing the green button. The screen went blank before her Mama appeared on the screen in front of her, causing her to excitedly sit up on her Mommy’s chest, as she surprisingly and excitedly said “Hi Mama” She smiled brightly waving at the screen as Clarke watched her in amusement at the massive smile.

 

“Where is my baby girl, I can’t see her”

 

“I’m here Mama,” Olivia said waving at the screen, not realising that due to there being no light on in the room her Mama couldn’t see her. Clarke laughed softly at her daughter’s answer before reaching over to her right turning on the lamp. Smiling as Lexa’s voice filled the room:

 

“There’s my princess”

 

“Hi Mama, can you see me now?” Olivia asked as she rubbed her eyes with her right hand.

 

“I can princess, you look tired baby”

 

“Don’t want to sleep Mama”

 

“I know you don’t baby girl, but you have to otherwise you won’t be able to go to school because you’ll be too tired. Then you might get sick, and that would make me and Mommy really sad….and Oscar”

 

“And Auntie Raven?”

 

“Yes and Auntie Raven, she wouldn’t want you to get sick” Seeing her daughter’s face contorting in thought she continued “Don’t worry Mommy will hold onto you tight, and now Mama can watch you so you don’t have any bad dreams ok?”

 

“You promise Mama?”

 

“I Mama Promise…ok?”

 

“Ok Mama”

 

“Good girl…so now you have to give Mommy the phone, then you can lay back on Mommy’s chest”. Lexa smiled, watching as her daughter handed the phone to her Mommy, who laid herself back a little more on the bed, moving her left arm to rest on the pillow next to her, holding the phone so Olivia could see her Mama. As she did so, Olivia leant forward leaning against her Mommy’s chest, using Clarke’s breasts as a make shift pillow of sorts as she always did. Her head facing in the direction of her the phone, smiling as she looked tiredly at her Mama’s face on the screen. “Are you comfy?” Olivia nodded her head softly at her Mama, a smile resting on her face. “Great, now all you have to do is close your eyes and think about all the good things you like”

 

“Like Mama’s smile?”

 

“Exactly, like Mama’s smile and Auntie Raven’s jokes, and Mommy’s cuddles….and Princesses”

 

“I love Princesses”

 

“I know you do baby…so now think about the best princesses, the ones you love the most”

 

“Like Mommy?”

 

“Exactly, think of Princess Mommy, close your eyes and I’ll tell you a story about Princess Mommy or Princess Clarke as we’ll call her” Lexa watched as Olivia closed her eyes, smiling as Clarke turned the phone slightly to show Lexa their daughters hands gripping onto the duvet covers, almost trapping Clarke in her place. Suppressing a laugh Lexa started telling Olivia a story, starting with the traditional, ‘Once Upon a Time in a land far far away lived a beautiful princess…’ she went on to tell Olivia all about the beautiful Princess Clarke, and her quest to find her long lost children. Telling Olivia how on her journey to the magical kingdom of Mission Hill. She told Olivia how the princess fought of dragons, evil kings and queens, and the nasty goblins who wanted her hair. By the time Lexa reached the end part of the story, Olivia was soundly asleep against Clarke’s chest, her breathing level as a natural smile graced her face. She just stopped speaking when Clarke turned the camera so it was facing her smiling at the camera and softly speaking so she didn’t wake up Olivia:

 

“Don’t stop…I wanna know what happens to the Princess”

 

“The usual fairytale ending of course Clarke”

 

“Oh yeah, so Princess Clarke sails off into the sunset with her long lost children…and that’s it?”

 

“Yes she does….but on the way she’s reunited with her long lost love….”

 

“Princess Alexa I hope”

 

“Of course….”

 

“And do they live happily ever after?”

 

“I hope they do”

 

“Me too”

 

Clarke smiled back as her and Lexa both silently agreed to end the call now they had succeeded in calming down their daughter, so she would go to sleep. Smiling at Clarke’s question and her smile to her response Lexa ended the call waving a soft goodbye at Clarke before she pressed the red button. Once she’d ended the call, she felt the urge to use the toilet, removing herself from Olivia’s bed she walked towards the bathroom quickly entering and using it. As she came out of the bathroom the flush echoing through the apartment, Lexa heard a small cry echoing through the apartment as the flush of the toilet disappeared. Turning in the direction of her bedroom she realised the sound was coming from there, slowly walking forwards she pushed the door gently forward, as the door opened she came upon the image of her twin sister laying on the bed her body shaking softly from what Lexa realised were small muffled sobs of sadness and heartbreak. Walking forwards she softly said her sister’s name as to not scare her “Rae…” At the sound of Lexa’s voice Raven turned her upper body, so she was looking at her sister, it was now that Lexa could see Raven’s tear stained cheeks and her red eyes. Without a second though Lexa moved forward crawling onto the bed and laying down behind Raven, taking her sister in her arms, and pulling her backwards into her chest more “It’s ok Rae….”

 

“What am I gonna do Lex…I’ve lost everything…” Raven cried out gripping hold of Lexa’s arms with her hands, finally letting all her emotions out as she held onto Lexa and Lexa held onto her. Tears rushed down her cheeks as sobs escaped her body, the emotional heartbreak of the last few hours taking over her. Suddenly feeling secure in her twin’s arms, every ounce of sadness she was feeling pouring out of her as the true reality of what Octavia had done to her hit her like a brick wall.

 

“It’s gonna be ok Rae…I promise….I’ve got you” Lexa affirmed in her sisters ear wrapping her arms completely around Raven’s torso, holding onto Raven tightly as she felt her broken sisters sob against her. Resting her chin on her sisters shoulder, so they were cheek to cheek, feeling her sisters tears against her own cheeks. Not saying another word she just held onto her sister, like nothing else in the world mattered to her but protecting her, just like she did when they were younger. 

* * *

 

** Two Days Later-Wednesday Morning 11am-Twin Records **

In the two days that had passed Raven had mostly stayed in bed, accompanied by Lexa every moment of the day, the only time she would leave Raven would be to make them something to eat or drink, or to use the shower or toilet. All Lexa was concerned with was making sure her sister wasn’t alone for longer than she needed to be. She’d let Raven cry on her shirt until there were no more tears left in her sister’s body. She’d hold onto her tightly if Raven needed it, sometimes Raven would hold onto her for hours sometimes just for minutes, and other times Raven’s rage would take over her and Lexa was the only person around to take it. She’d get angry at her sisters words or the mention of Octavia’s name, and she’d ball her fist up and cock it back ready to punch herself…until they’d lock eyes and Raven’s anger disappeared and turned into upset at nearly hitting her sister for the second time in as many days. It was then Lexa decided that Raven being locked away wasn’t helping her processing everything that had happened. That had led to her convincing Raven to go to the studio to work on a few tracks they needed to finish. Now they were sat in the studio Raven was listening to the track through her headphones whilst Lexa was trying to work out the words.

 

Unknown to Raven, Lexa had called Octavia if she could have Zachary for the night to cheer Raven up. Once she’d explained that Raven still didn’t wanna see her, Octavia agreed to drop off Zachary at the studio. Lexa instantly realised that was a mistake and asked Octavia to drop Zachary off with Clarke, then calling Clarke to check that Octavia dropping off Zachary was ok with her. Clarke confirmed that was fine and even offered to drop Zachary off for Lexa, which she thankfully accepted. She hadn’t spoken to Clarke since that phonecall nearly two hours ago, she was about to remove herself from the room and call Clarke, when their phone rang, picking it up Lexa listened as Maya told her that Clarke was at the front desk, quickly telling her to let Clarke in, she stood up walking over to the door and opening it. Walking through the door, she smiled as she was met with the image of Clarke holding Zachary walking towards her as the twins walked calmly beside her. Olivia was the first to notice her Mama a massive smile breaking onto her face as she took off in a sprint, surprisingly she didn’t shout out for her Mama as she ran, instead remaining silent until she collided into her Mamas chest:

 

“Hi Mama” She softly whispered into her Mama’s ear

 

“Why are you whispering princess?”

 

“Mommy said we are surprising Aunt Raven so we have to be quiet”

 

“Oh ok, well thank you for being a good girl then”

 

“You’re welcome Mama”

 

“Hey my prince” Lexa smiled turning her attention in her sons direction, as she spoke a massive smile spread across Oscars face as he took off running until he too crashed into his Mama. Lexa’s arms wrapped around her son, squeezing him gently before releasing him and standing up walking over to Clarke and Zachary. Leaning forward she placed a gentle kiss on Clarke’s cheek before Zachary’s arms shoot into the air smiling at his Aunt, laughing at the reaction she held her hands up lifting the little boy out of Clarke’s arms. As Zachary landed against her chest, he looked at her placing his hand on her cheek gently stroking Lexa’s face with his finger, as he did so his face contorted and he softly said:

 

“Not Mama”

 

“No I’m not…I’m...”

 

“Smart Lexa”

 

“Exactly…” Lexa placed a gentle kiss on Zachary’s cheek before lowly responding “But we’re going to surprise Mama now…she’s in there…..” Zachary let out a gasp before Lexa added “But we have to be really quiet until the door opens and then you can run at Mama really fast ok?”

 

“Yeah” Zachary happily responded his hands quickly moving to his cheek in excitement. One of his hands half in his mouth as he looked up at his Auntie Lexa. His face a picture of happiness and excitement. Smiling at her nephew Lexa walked closer to the door placing Zachary on the floor holding onto his hand as she placed her hand on the door ready to push it open. Leaning down she looked at Zachary softly asking:

 

“Ready Monster?”

 

“Yeah” He cutely let out as Lexa let go of his hand, standing up she pushed the door open softly speaking:

 

“I’ve got a present for you Rae….”

 

“If it’s another Coffee Lex…I swear I might actually hi….”

 

Before Raven could finish her sentence Lexa had looked down at Zachary telling him ‘Go’ smiling as he took off yelling at the top of his voice “MAMAAAAAAA” At the voice Raven’s head turned shooting in the direction of the door, as massive smile gracing her face as she saw her son running towards her. She didn’t have time to stand up, so quickly leant forward lifting Zachary into the air and onto her chest as soon as her son was close enough. As Zachary crashed into her chest, he wrapped his arms around her neck holding onto her tightly, as he buried his head in her neck. Holding onto her son for what felt like hours, she finally released her hold on him, pulling him back slightly looking down at Zachary’s small happiness filled face “Hi Mama”

 

“Hi Baby” Raven almost choked on her tears of joy as she laughed at her son’s small happy words. Looking up at Lexa she noticed Clarke and the twins at the door with her sister, taking a breath she softly asked, “How is he here without O?”

 

“I called her and asked if we could have him for the day including tonight, she agreed and I asked her to drop him off with Clarke, so the twins could have some cousin time before Clarke kindly brought him here”. Lexa explained deciding that telling Raven that Octavia wanted to see her wasn’t something Raven needed to hear or worry about at this moment in time. “That call a minute ago was Maya telling me that Clarke was here, which I have to admit was all Clarke…I was meant to go pick up Zachary in ten minutes”

 

“He was asking for his Mama, so I thought why not bring him here…right Zachary?”

 

Zachary nodded his head at his Auntie Clarke’s question as he leant forward into his Mama, Raven smiled at the action softly asking, “Is that right Mister? Did you miss Mama?” Zachary nodded his head into Raven’s chest “Good because Mama has missed you a million percent” Zachary smiled at the words leaning forward even more holding onto his Mama’s shirts as he continued to cuddle against her.

 

Lexa watched on smiling as her sister and nephew cuddled together in their private studio, she hadn’t seen that smile on Raven’s face over the last three days and she had to admit it was weird; Raven had always been a smiler. And seeing her without a smile was a rare sight to see, it was something Raven was known for when they were younger, a few people knew about their family life and their Mom’s drinking and would always ask and wonder why Raven always had a smile on her face. Lexa had to admit it was great to see her sister with that smile again. Looking around the room she realised it wasn’t the best place for a two year old to spend their day so decided on something else.

 

“Why don’t we all go out for lunch?” Turning back to look at Clarke she softly added “All of us…if you’re ok with that of course?”

 

“If Raven’s in then I’m in….what about you two?” Clarke added, looking down at the twins smiling at Olivia as the little girl leant against her Mama’s leg, Lexa’s hand coming to gently rest on her daughter’s ponytail, her fingers running through it. Olivia turned her face, grazing it against her Mama’s thigh as she turned and looked at Mommy, half her face still pressing against her Mama’s thigh. “You wanna have lunch with Me, Mama, Oz, Zach and Auntie Rae?”

 

“Yes please Mommy”

 

“Ok then….What about you Oz?” Clarke asked turning her attention to her son, who at the mention of his nickname jumped forward and in front of his Mommy, looking up at her his hands resting over his stomach. “Does that sound good?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mommy’s question “Good” Clarke responded leaning forward and lifting her son up, smiling at her son, she placed a kiss on his cheek before he leant his head against her shoulder a smile on his face as he watched his Auntie Rae.

 

Lexa smiled at Clarke and Oscar, before looking back to her sister and nephew. As her eyes landed on Raven, her sister smiled brightly at her “Lunch would be great…anything to spend some time with my king and my favourite niece and nephew…”

 

“We’re your only ones Auntie Rae” Olivia laughed out leaning her face into her Mama’s thigh a little more

 

“Well seeing as you’re my only niece and nephew, you have to be my favourites don’t you?”

 

Olivia let out a small dirty laugh before responding “Yeah” Her attention turning to her Mama “Are you coming Mama?”

 

“I am indeed, and I’m going to eat all your fries…so you better not order any”

 

“But you can’t Mama…their my fries”

 

“There gonna be Mama’s fries…all of them…” Lexa jokingly let out, leaning down gently grabbing her daughter’s cheeks as she leant down kissing her daughter a few times on the lips before standing back up, Olivia laughed at her Mama’s actions her hands shooting to her Mama’s wrists holding on and pulling her Mama’s arms back down. Looking down at her daughter’s cute and innocent face, she asked, “You want cuddles?” Olivia nodded her head quickly, making Lexa smile and laugh as she leant down lifting Olivia into the air. “Ok everyone…let’s do this….you ready Rae? ...”

 

“Yeah, let’s do it…food time my mini king” Raven laughed at the excitement that came from her son at the mention of food. He instantly sat up his legs wriggling on her lap his face filled with joy. “Such a little foodie…go on walk with your cousin’s” She added watching as Oscar was lowered to the floor from Clarke’s chest, and Olivia was lowered to the floor by Lexa, all of the ready to leave the studio. As she placed Zachary on the ground, she watched him happily walk over to Oscar, watching the two boys interact, as Olivia moved next to them as both the twins took one of Zachary’s hand in their own. Standing up she walked over to Lexa, pulling her towards her slightly she looked at her sister honestly and whole heartedly saying, “Thank you”

 

“It was nothing”

 

“No it wasn’t….You didn’t have to do this for me…..but I’m really glad you did, I’ve missed him so much over the last two days”

 

“I know you have”

 

“I’m really sorry for how I’ve been the last few days, I’ve been all over the place and at times a real B I T C H to you,” Raven softly said spelling out the word BITCH so none of the children understood what the word was. “I just wanted to thank you ok….It means more than I can say…”

 

“I know…now come here you big softy” Lexa smiled seeing the emotion creeping into Raven’s face, reaching up she placed her left hand on the back of Raven’s neck pulling her sister forward and into a hug. Raven instantly wrapped her arms around her sister, hugging her tightly as Lexa did the same thing, wrapping her arms around Raven squeezing her gently. After a minute both women pulled back and Lexa placed a gentle kiss on her sister’s cheek “Now stop being an emotional mess, and move because I’m starving”, she added placing a gentle slap on Raven’s cheek smiling and walking towards the door.

 

“You’re always hungry…it’s a family trait” Raven laughed walking towards the door of the studio, grabbing her jacket as she walked forward she grabbed the door closing it behind her. Walking next to the two older women as they walked with the kids towards their cars. 

* * *

 

** Lexa’s Apartment-That Afternoon-16:00 **

Lexa, Raven and Clarke had ended up spending the afternoon together, after they’d finished lunch the twins and Zachary were filled with energy so the three women decided to take them to the park to run off all the energy they had. They’d spent a couple hours with the kids letting them play around as much as they wanted. About an hour into their park visit Olivia fell over and grazed her knee, standing up, she’d walked over to Clarke tears rushing down her cheeks as she cried from the pain the falling had caused her. Clarke managed to quickly calm Olivia down, wiping away the tears and checking Olivia over for any further injuries other than the graze to her knee. Once she was sure, her daughter was fine, she continued calming Olivia down letting the little girl know that she was fine. She lifted her onto her lap letting Olivia lean against her as she leant further back on the bench. Lexa had been watching the situation from a distance as her and Raven played with Zachary, and Oscar, making sure Olivia wasn’t given a reason to get more upset. Once Clarke was finished, Olivia looked around the mark for her Mama, calling out loudly to her Mama before jumping off Clarke’s lap and running to her Mama, once Olivia was close enough Lexa lifted her daughter off the floor wrapping her arms around her and listening as Olivia told her what had happened. Carrying Olivia around for a moment before placing her on the swing, the afternoon went on perfectly, all three kids played nicely together in the playground, until they got a little tired. All three adults decided that maybe going to a mall might be better. Finding the nearest mall, Mission Hill Shopping Mall, they went inside taking their time to walk around and go into stores, not rushing to walk around due to the kids. Zachary got tired quickly and Raven took great happiness in picking up her son and carrying him around the rest of the way, whilst Oscar held onto his Mommy’s hand and Olivia held onto her Mama’s hand. After hours walking around, stopping to get a drink on one occasion, they decided to go home. Seeing as Clarke had driven to the park, she drove them all back to the studio, where Raven jumped back in her car strapping her son in and waiting for her sister to say her goodbyes.

 

Once she had said goodbye to Clarke and the twins, Lexa jumped into Raven’s car entertaining her nephew whilst Raven drove them back to her apartment. Once they reached the apartment Raven parked the car, and the three of them got out of the car walking to Lexa’s apartment, as soon as they entered it Zachary ran off exploring the apartment he’d only been to on two occasions. Raven laughed at her son, before running after him following him as he looked at everything in the apartment. Lexa sat herself down on the couch turning on the TV deciding to let Raven enjoy some time with her son. After a while of watching some random nature show her phone buzzed in her pocket, pulling it out she smiled noticing a text from Clarke, opening the message she laughed softly as she read it:

 

**_Clarke: Your daughter is being a drama queen_ **

****

**_Lexa: My Daughter? ….I think you’ll find the Drama Queen comes from your side_ **

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**_Clarke: LEXA…This IS NOT funny…she thinks her legs gonna drop off_ **

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**_Lexa: What? Why does she think that?_ **

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**_Clarke: Because she grazed her knee_ **

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**_Lexa: That sounds a little dramatic even for OUR daughter_ **

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**_Clarke: Ok so I may have told her if I don’t clean her graze out her leg would fall off_ **

**_Clarke: And then perhaps forgot to clean it out when we got home_ **

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**_Lexa: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha_ **

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**_Clarke: LEXA THIS ISNT FUNNY_ **

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**_Lexa: Oh but it is Clarke….you set yourself up for this_ **

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**_Clarke: I know_ ** **_L_ ** **_I completely forgot now she’s having a FULL BLOWN princess meltdown_ **

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**_Lexa: Just sit her down and tell her it’s ok, because NOW you’re going to clean it out and it’ll all be ok_ **

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**_Clarke: I tried that already she won’t sit down or calm down even_ **

**_Clarke: Seriously, as I’m writing this message she’s sitting on the floor crying and throwing anything near her_ **

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**_Lexa: Ok Keep Calm…Super Mama to the rescue, sit down on the floor next to her and play the voice message I’m about to send you…ok?_ **

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**_Clarke: ok….I’m sitting next to her now_ **

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**_Lexa: Good –_** Lexa smiled at the message before looking down at her phone holding the voice record button and speaking into it before pressing send ** _\- “Hey Princess, why are you being bad for Mommy?”_**

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Within a minute she received a recording back smiling even more as she pressed play ** _“I’m not being bad, I’m scared Mama…I don’t want my leg to fall off”_** As she listened to the recording she noticed the crackling sound in her daughter’s voice as she spoke.

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**_Lexa: “Your leg won’t fall of princess…I Promise”_ **

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**_Clarke/Olivia: “But Mommy said it would”_ **

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**_Lexa: “Mommy was joking princess; she didn’t mean to scar you”_ **

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**_Clarke/Olivia: “Mommy didn’t mean it Mama…She said sorry”_ **

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**_Lexa: “See all better baby….so are you gonna let Mommy clean your knee?”_ **

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**_Clarke/Olivia: “Yes Mama”_ **

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**_Lexa: “Good, Thank You Princess”_ **

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**_Clarke/Olivia: “Your welcome Mama…..can I keep talking Mommy?”_ **

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**_Lexa: “We can’t keep talking right now…which I’m sure Mommy just told you…but Mama will call later ok?”_ **

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**_Clarke/Olivia: “Ok Mama………….I LOVE YOU MAMA”_ **

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**_Lexa: “I love you too Princess…be good for Mommy”_** Lexa finished talking smiling as she leant her head back, playing the messages of her daughters last message over and over again. She couldn’t explain it but there was something about hearing her kids say they loved her that made everything feel fine for her. No matter what she and Clarke were going through or whatever she was going through on her own, hearing those words made everything else disappear completely and made the sun shine and the rain stop. Just four words that meant nothing alone but everything when put together. As she thought about the feeling, her daughter’s words gave her she was brought out of her thoughts as the phone vibrated. Looking down, she noticed a new message in her chat with Clarke, looking at the message she read it:

 

**_Clarke: Thank you….she’s fine now….she’s even getting the antiseptic cream and wipes for me_ **

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**_Lexa: What can I say I have the magic touch?_ **

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**_Clarke: You do ;-)_ **

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**_Lexa: You are such a pervert_ **

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**_Clarke: Whatever, that was meant to be a smiley face not a wink_ **

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**_Lexa: Sure, it was Horn dog_ **

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**_Clarke: Whatever Lexa…..Anyways thank you and I’ll call you later_ **

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**_Lexa: Ok boss lady look after my princess._** Lexa looked down at her phone internally trying to decide whether to send the message swirling around in her mind or not. Typing out the message she closed her eyes biting her bottom lip softly before thinking ‘what’s the worst that could happen?’ and hitting the send button. Looking down at the chat she smiled as a message from Clarke appeared in the chat at the same as hers.

 

**Clarke: I will, Chat later…..I Love you**

**Lexa: Chat Later…I Love you**

****

Lexa laughed softly at the message as another message came through

 

**Clarke: Great Minds think alike huh?**

**Lexa: Yeah they do…but the greater ones are brunette ;-)**

**Clarke: Whatever, I’ll talk to you later**

Lexa smiled at the message biting her lip softly as she leant her head back against the back of the couch, closing her eyes for a while she kept them closed until, she felt someone jump on her lap. Opening her eyes, she looked down seeing a smiling Zachary looking up at her, in the corner of her eye she saw Raven sit down beside her. Looking down at her nephew she softly asked:

 

“Why are you so happy Monster?”

 

“Mama big bed”

 

“Does Mama have a big bed?”

 

Zachary nodded his head at her “Mama have big everything” He let out giggling excitedly and clapping his hands together as he looked to his Mama innocently “Me stay with Mama” Looking at her sister, Lexa couldn’t help the smile that graced her face seeing the smile on Raven’s at having her son, even if only for a day. Before she could say anything to Raven, Zachary spoke again, “Me stay forever”

 

Raven’s smile disappeared instantly as she looked at Lexa not knowing how to respond to her son’s wish to stay with her forever. Softly smiling at Raven she turned to Zachary softly taking his hands in hers “Well you can’t stay here forever” Seeing the sad pout on Zachary’s face she continued “But you can come see Mama all the time…you see if you stay here with me and Mama, then who will look after Mommy”. Seeing Zachary’s sad pout was disappearing slightly she kept on talking “See, when Mama is here I look after her but that means I can’t look after Mommy…plus if you weren’t at home Mommy would be really sad”

****

“Mama not sad”

 

“Of course Mama is sad without you and Mommy…. But I can look after Mama, and I can make sure she isn’t sad. And you can look after Mommy”

****

“No more Mama?”

 

“What? ….don’t be silly, Mama is going to see every chance she can”

 

“And smart Lexa?”

 

“Yep sometimes I’ll be there”

 

Zachary looked at her before turning towards his Mama, his hands slipping out of Lexa’s hands his right hand moving to gently graze over his bottom lip. “Mama still love me?” Raven suddenly found her words hearing her son doubting her love for him. Shuffling a little closer, she lifted Zachary off Lexa’s lap and onto her own looking at her son, she responded:

 

“Of course Mama loves you….you are the only thing I love more than Smart Lexa”

****

“Whole world Mama?”

 

“Yep, in the whole world…I love you the most…then Smart Lexa”

 

“Mama love Mommy?”

 

Raven had to think to herself for a second, she’d asked herself that question a lot over the last few days but hadn’t actually answered the question, always pushing the answer to the back of her mind. Taking a small breath in she looked at her son honestly answering, “Yes, I love Mommy….so much it makes my chest hurt sometimes, but right now Mama needs to be with Auntie Lexa”

 

“I look after Mommy?”

 

“Yes, but Mama will see you all the time, and I’ll call you on Mommy’s phone so you can see my face”

 

“Pretty Mama”

 

“Exactly… we can see each other day on the phone…is that ok?”

 

“Ok Mama….” Zachary looked at his Mama, holding his arms open wide a massive smile spread across his face as he asked, “Mama Hugs”

****

“Of course…come here and give me loads of Mama Cuddles Mister” Zachary let out a massive excited giggle before he leant forward giggling and wrapping his arms around his Mama. Raven held onto her son, just happy to be near him, after everything that had happened over the last two days not seeing Zachary was the worst thing. He was the reason she got up in the morning, the reason she’d spend half the day in the studio on occasion, the reason she wanted to get more record deals, she wanted to be able to give him the life that she and Lexa never had. She never wanted him to be scared or wonder if she loved him, she never wanted him to feel how she felt. Placing a gentle kiss on her son’s head she smiled as Lexa found a film to watch on the TV, turning her son around to face the TV she placed a kiss on the top of his head, keeping her arms wrapped around her son enjoying the time she was getting to spend with the only man she’d ever love.


	19. Own Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke spend some quality time playing with the kids. Octavia and Clarke had a heart to heart, and Clarke bluntly tells Octavia a few things she needs to hear. Lexa and Raven have a Mini Heart to Heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank You to everyone that has left Kudos on this story, I've changed some of the tags on this story so hopefully it hasn't caused anyone to not be able to see this :-) I hope you all enjoy this chapter :-) 
> 
> Woods House  
> Downstairs-Front porch is about 5 metres from the door to the steps that lead to the driveway and pavement with about 3 metres of grass. The porch has a bench on it to the left hand side of the door. The door is a typical type of door, with a small panel at the top of the door. The front door leads straight into the living room, the staircase is to the right hand side of the door, with a big L shaped black leather couch leading from next to the front door and around the wall until it stopped about a metre from the TV unit, there is a cabinet under the stairs that holds most of the twins’ bigger toys, in front of door that leads to that cabinet is an average sized black toybox, with Olivia & Oscar written on the top of it. From the Door to the Kitchen door is about 20 feet that leads into the kitchen, as you walk into the kitchen there is a small corridor that leads to the door of Lexa’s den. The den is about 20 feet by 15 feet, every wall is covered with a bookcase, Lexa’s desk is about 8 feet wide and 4 feet long, (an average big shots desk I suppose), on her desk she has a desk organiser, notepads and her and Clarke’s wedding picture on the right, on the left she has a picture of her Raven, the twins and Zachary, along with a ipad and a set of headphones she uses for music. Around the den in places on the shelves, between groups of books, are pictures of her and Clarke over the years, along with pictures of her and the twins, or her, Clarke and the twins, or just Clarke and the twins. On the wall behind her desk is the first ever platinum desk her and Raven received, on either side is a picture of her and Raven, on is of them creating the track and the other is of them with the platinum desk held between them. The kitchen leads around to the right where the main cooking and kitchen area is (Cooker, fridge. Cupboards and so on), the kitchen bent around to the right where the kitchen table was, behind the kitchen table a little to the left was the back door that leads to the garden and the porch way.  
> Upstairs-The staircase leads to a quite big landing (Maybe 10 feet by 10 feet), Clarke and Lexa’s bedroom is the furthest door on the right, their bedroom is about 15 feet by 15 feet, the have a closet at the back of the room, and of to the right in their bedroom is a bathroom (on suite). The twin’s bedroom is about 20 feet by 20 feet, it has two sides to it, one side painted blue for Oscar and the other painted Pink for Olivia, and their bed duvet covers match the colours on the wall and their personalities. The have a chest of drawers with all their clothes in on the right hand side and on the left is a closet for more clothes and some toys of theirs. They have windows above their beds that left in the natural light from outside; there are fairytale themed blinds on the windows. The guest room, is about 12 feet by 10 feet, so is the smallest room of all of them, it has a double bed, plain black blinds on the windows, with the walls painted white and black.  
> IF ANYONE VIEWED OR INVISIONED THE HOUSE DIFFERENTLY THEN PLEASE CONTINUE TO USE THAT IMAGE, THIS IS JUST SOMETHING I WANTED TO PUT IN INCASE PEOPLE WANTED MORE DESCRIPTION ON HOW I SEE THINGS WHEN I’M WRITING 

** Chapter 19-Own Up **

**Woods House-Living Room-16:14**

Clarke had just finished cleaning out Olivia’s wound on her knee, silently pleased that her wife had calmed down their daughter. Thankfully, Olivia had sat down silently as she wiped the graze clean then applying antiseptic cream and leaving the graze without a plaster allowing it to breathe. Plus, she knew if she put a plaster over the graze, it would last perhaps an hour before Olivia pulled it off not liking the feeling of the plaster on her skin. As soon as she’d told her daughter, she was finished, Olivia jumped up carefully picking up the antiseptic cream and wipes carrying them back to where her Mommy kept them. Clarke stood herself up stretching her back out as she walked back over to the couch, as she sat down Oscar came jogging into the room his Superman action figure in one hand and his Batman action figure in the other, flying them around in the air making flying and what sounded like gun noises, as he spun around moving the figures through the air before he turned around disappearing into the kitchen, Clarke was silently happy she’d locked the back door so her son couldn’t leave the house without her knowing. As Clarke sat down watching her son play around, disappearing and reappearing numerous times within the minutes since she began watching him. The sound of Olivia coming down the stairs brought her attention to her daughter, Clarke watched as Olivia ran across the room letting out a small giggle as she ran over to her Mommy. Jumping onto the couch Olivia sat herself down next to her Mommy, looking up at her innocently:

 

“Thank you Mommy”

 

“What for princess?”

 

“For fixing my leg, so it didn’t fall off”

 

“Olivia…you remember what Mama said right?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy “Your leg was never going to fall off, Mommy just wanted to make sure that you let me clean your graze…I didn’t mean to scare you”

 

“I was really scared Mommy….I like my leg”

 

“I know you do baby, and I’m sorry I scared you…from now on Mommy will just tell you instead of making up silly things that might scare you”

 

“It wasn’t funny Mommy”

 

“I know it wasn’t, and I am really really really really…..really sorry baby girl….can you forgive Mommy?”

 

Olivia looked up at her Mommy standing up on the couch and climbing onto her Mommy’s lap she reached up, her hands tangling in the lower loose ends of her Mommy’s hair, her hands fiddling with them as she leant forward hugging her Mommy tightly. “I forgive you Mommy” She mumbled into her Mommy’s neck lifting her head up she pursed her lips leaning forward and kissing her Mommy on the lips then leaning her head back on her Mommy’s shoulder.

 

“Thank you Princess”

 

“Mommy…can we play princesses?”

 

“Of course we can, why don’t you go and get ready and I’ll set up your castle”

 

“Thank you Mommy” Olivia smiled out kissing her Mommy again before jumping off her Mommy’s lap and running towards the stairs, climbing them quickly and heading into her bedroom.

 

Clarke stood herself up walking through the living room stopping in front of the toy compartment of the staircase, moving Oscar’s toy box forward she opened up the compartment she removed her daughter’s princess castle from inside. Walking to the middle of the room, moving the table out of the way, she went about setting up the princess castle for her daughter, just as she finished Clarke turned seeing Olivia coming back down the stairs, dressed in a pink princess dress but with a sad frown on her face. “What’s wrong princess?” She asked as Olivia ran the short distance between them, wrapping her arms around her Mommy holding on tightly.

 

“I lost my crown Mommy….I can’t be a real princess without my crown”

 

“Oh Princess, it’s ok…”

 

“No Mommy…I losted it and now I can’t be a princess”

 

“Ok…just calm down ok?” Clarke pulled back seeing the sad frown still plastered on her daughter’s face “When did you last see it?” Olivia shrugged her shoulders at her Mommy, her frown growing more and more. “How about me and you have a look around the house huh? ….I think we can find it….ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy”

 

“Good” Clarke added as Olivia took a step back waiting for her Mommy to stand up. Once Clarke had stood herself up Olivia reached up her hand sliding into her Mommy’s, holding onto it tightly. “Come on then; let’s start with the toy box” Clarke soothed swinging her and Olivia’s hands softly making her daughter laugh at the action. Stopping in front of the toy box, she lifted the top of the toy box with her free hand, beginning to look in the toy box. Olivia watched her Mommy for a second before moving forward and standing next to her Mommy beginning to look into toy box, and copying her Mommy’s actions. Clarke continued to look through the box until they reached the bottom, not finding the crown they were looking for. Closing the toy box, she moved it forward allowing her access to the compartment under the stairs where you usually kept all of Olivia and Oscar’s bigger toys. Kneeling down she looked around the compartment, she was about to give up looking when something glimmered in the corner of her eye. Focusing on where the glimmer came from at the back of the compartment, she noticed her daughter’s princess crown, leaning forward she grabbed the crown with her finger tips lifting it from the floor and sitting back on her heels. Turning herself on her knees so she was facing Olivia, she noticed the hopeful look on her daughter’s face. Holding the crown in the air, she smiled softly saying, “Look what Mommy found”

 

Olivia let out a massive gasp lunging forward and wrapping her arms around her Mommy. “THANK YOU MOMMY” She loudly and excitedly let out as she excitedly hugged her Mommy.

 

“Your welcome baby….now let’s put this crown where it belongs, yeah?”

 

Olivia jumped back looking at her Mommy and excitedly saying “Yeah” Her hands clasped over her chest as Clarke held the crown in her hands, slowly moving it in the air carefully and slowly placing the crown on her daughter’s head. An excited giggle come from Olivia as the crown landed on her head, Clarke couldn’t help but feel a burst of happiness inside her as she watched the happiness spread across her daughter’s face. “We can play now Mommy” Olivia let out jumping excitedly before pulling on her Mommy’s hand. Standing up Clarke quickly closed the compartment under the stairs, pushing the toy box back against the compartment door with her free hand. Letting her daughter pull her over to the princess castle that was set up in the middle of the living room. Sitting down on the floor Clarke and Olivia began playing Princesses, with Oscar playing superheroes with his action figures in the background, Clarke followed her daughter’s moves watching and playing along as Olivia told a story to her Mommy acting out everything she was saying herself. Clarke and Olivia played princesses for hours, with Oscar jumping in and playing along with them, playing the Prince that saved the princesses from the bad King and Queen.

 

They played on for hours until it was around 18:00 and time for Clarke to make the twin’s dinner, leaving them to play along with each other she went about making a pizza for all three of them, deciding to cook something nice and easy for the three of them. Placing the pizza in the oven, she went about making some sweet potato fries, hand cutting the fries she placed them on an oven tray placing the tray in the oven, hoping they would be cooked by the time the Pizza was done. Standing in the doorway of the kitchen, she watched the twin’s playing princes and princesses, a natural smile forming on her face. She must have been watching the twins for longer than she thought because the next thing she knew her phone timer was buzzing in her back pocket, walking back into the kitchen she went about checking the food, removing the pizza happy to find it was ready, next she removed the sweet potato fries checking them and finding out they too were cooked, she guessed it was because of the high heat she was cooking the pizza on. Grabbing a plate she cut up the pizza giving the twin two smaller pieces and a small amount of fries before serving herself two pieces if pizza and the rest of the fries, placing the rest of the pizza on a plate and in the microwave. Calling out to the twins, she smiled hearing their small feet hurriedly hitting off the floor before they appeared in the kitchen next, running forward until they were at the table, both climbing into their seats and waiting patiently for their food to be placed in front of them. Walking over to the twins she placed the plates in front of them before turning back walking to the cupboard and removing the tomato sauce and brown sauce from the cupboard, walking back over placing the sauce on the table in between the twin’s plates. Grabbing her own plate she walked back towards the twins, only to be stopped in her place when the doorbell rang:

 

“You two stay here ok? …Mommy’s going to answer the door”

 

“Ok Mommy….can we eat the pizza Mommy?”

 

“Of course, just be careful ok and leave the sauce until Mommy comes back”

 

“Ok….I love Pizza Mommy” Olivia smiled looking up at her Mommy her face so innocent and pure

 

“I know you do baby…” Clarke smiled before walking off to the door, as she did she heard the twins talking to each other about who loved Pizza more. Looking through the window to the right of the door she recognised the person standing on her doorstep, unlocking the door she pulled it open before speaking “Octavia…what can I do for you?” Seeing the sadness on her best friends face Clarke stepped aside “Come inside, your just in time for pizza” She noticed the sad smile on Octavia’s face as she walked past her, she also smelt the slight odour of beer, she could tell Octavia wasn’t drunk but she was guessing that she’d had a few before heading over there. Closing the door, she locked it making sure the latch was on; she turned around walking back to the kitchen with Octavia following her. Walking into the kitchen Clarke heard the twins talking about their Mama’s favourite pizza, motioning for Octavia to sit down she grabbed the leftover pizza heating it up as she made Octavia a coffee, minutes later she carried both items over to the table and placing them in front of her best friend. Sitting down opposite Octavia and between the twins in her normal seat, she looked Oscar and then at Olivia noticing her daughter had pizza all over her face. “What a messy princess?” Olivia laughed as her Mommy leant forward grabbing a napkin and wiping her face “I’m gonna tell Mama how messy you are?”

 

“Mama knows Mommy”

 

“She does?”

 

“Yeah she calls us Prince and Princess Messy pants” Olivia laughed out, the sentence made a small smile creep onto Octavia’s face whilst Oscar laughed along with his twin sister.

 

“I bet she does”

 

“Is Zachary messy Auntie Octavia?” Clarke wanted to wince but resisted the urge hoping Olivia hadn’t unknowingly upset Octavia with her innocent question

 

“Oh yeah he is…he’s a messy pants just like you and Oz” Octavia softly answered as she began eating her pizza, taking a small sip of her coffee as she smiled at the twins and Clarke. “Auntie Raven is a messy eater as well”

 

“Is Mama a messy eater Mommy?”

 

“No she isn’t baby, she used to be”

 

“When she was younger”

 

“Yeah….now Princess Messy Pants, eat the rest of your food and then bath time”

 

“Ok Mommy” Olivia sweetly answered returning her attention to her food, smiling as she ate her pizza her eyes moving from the pizza to her Mommy every few seconds, a smile on her face as she ate and looked at her Mommy, copying her Mommy as she ate her own food.

 

Clarke continued eating her food knowing her daughter was carefully watching her every move. She also knew Oscar was watching her as well though she could see in the corner of her eye that Oscar was switching his attention from her to Olivia then to Octavia, all whilst eating his own food. She had to admit to herself that she was impressed by her son’s ability to multitask. Continuing to eat her food without speaking, she finished turning her attention to her children who were still eating, both of them taking their time as their Mommy had told them numerous times. Looking over at Octavia she smiled at her best friend as she watched her drinking the rest of her coffee, her plate now empty of the pizza that had previously been there. A few minutes had passed when the twins finished their food at the same time. Oscar victoriously threw his hands into the air proudly shouting:

 

“FINISHED” Clarke smiled at her son’s proudness, for a long time he hadn’t been able to eat as much as his sister had. But now he was growing more he was able to eat more in one go, just like his Mama. She watched as Oscar smiled brightly at her. “Can I have some juice please Mommy?”

 

“Of course baby boy…..” Looking to Olivia who was sitting patiently wiping her small hands on the napkin she’d left on the table minutes before hand. “You want a drink as well Princess?” Olivia nodded her head, making Clarke slightly concerned by Olivia’s sudden withdrawn behaviour. Standing up she walked over to the fridge opening it and removing two small cartoons of juice for the twins, before closing the fridge door. Deciding that giving them more than a cartoon of juice would make them more hyperactive, making it impossible to get them to bed. Stopping near the centre island of the kitchen, she held the cartoons in her hands softly speaking: “You can both take your juice into the living room and watch some TV…and you can leave your plates there”

 

Oscar quickly removed himself from his seat smiling at his Mommy as he quickly walked over to her looking sweetly up at her. Olivia slowly removed herself from her seat walking over to her Mommy and brother, as Clarke handed the cartoons to each of the twins they both sweetly thanked her before turning and walking into the living room. As they walked out Clarke watched Oscar take Olivia’s hand in his own, he must have noticed or sensed the difference in his sister as well and wanted to make her feel better. Letting out a small sigh she walked back over to the table, picking up the used plates quickly carrying them, and then placing them into the dishwasher, walking back over to sit opposite Octavia. Sitting opposite her best friend, she leant forward on the table leaning her forearms on the table as she softly asked, “Why did you come here O?”

 

“I can leave Clarke it’s no problem”

 

“No O…I’m not saying that…I just wondered is all”

 

“I couldn’t stand the silence at home”

 

“It can be deafening can’t it?”

 

“Yeah…I’m so used to Raven being there making some form of noise, even if it was just her scribbling words down in her notepad, even when it was silent it was different than it is now”

 

“I know what you mean; it’s more than just the silence”

 

“It’s the knowing”

 

“Exactly…knowing you’re on your own”

 

“Yep, I just couldn’t handle it anymore…I tried having a drink to calm me down but it didn’t work…it just seemed to make it worse, every swig of that beer I took reminded me more that Raven wasn’t there. After the second beer I decided to go for a walk, so I did and I ended up here…I’m sorry”

 

“You don’t need to be sorry O…I’m glad you came here” Seeing the small smile pull at Octavia’s lips she added “Once the twins are asleep we can have chat or watch a film whatever you want O…I’m here for you, ok?”

 

“Thanks Clarke”

 

“No problem…we better get in there before trouble kicks off” Clarke smiled standing herself up, the best friends exchanged a look before Octavia placed her plate and cup in the dishwasher before following Clarke into the living room. As she walked into the living room Clarke noticed Olivia sitting in the corner part of the couch, watching a cartoon that Clarke guessed Oscar had placed on, she had her cartoon of juice in her hand unopened as she looked sadly at the screen. Seeing Oscar was happily watching the TV drinking his juice as he did so, Clarke walked over to her daughter sitting down next to her; she looked down at her daughter forcing herself not to frown. Leaning down at little more she spoke so only her and Olivia could hear what she was saying. “You ok Princess?” Olivia softly shook her head as she watched her Auntie Octavia sit down next to her brother. “What’s wrong?” Olivia looked around the room not saying anything, seeing the action Clarke got a little closer to Olivia leaning into her daughter more before softly adding, “I won’t tell anyone princess, I promise” Olivia paused for a second before she leant into her Mommy, placing her hands on her Mommy’s right shoulder before leaning in and whispering:

 

“I miss Mama”

 

“Oh my little princess…come here” Clarke soothed, as soon as the words left Clarke’s mouth Olivia was climbing onto her lap burying her head in her Mommy’s shoulder. Clarke instantly wrapped her arms around her daughter, shuffling herself further onto the couch until she was sitting in the corner of the couch, her left side leaning against the side of the couch as she faced the TV bringing her legs up to stretch out on the couch pointing to the TV. Moving Olivia so her back was to Oscar and Octavia, she leant her chin against her daughter’s head softly whispering “I miss Mama too….a lot”. Olivia moved her head slowly looking up and looking at her Mommy with questioning eyes “It’s true…I miss Mama in the mornings when I wake up, when I’m eating breakfast even when I’m sitting on my own….I miss her all the time”

 

“I don’t like it Mommy”

 

“I know princess, me neither…but you know what helps me miss Mama just a bit?” Olivia shook her head at her Mommy, looking on with intrigue “You and Oscar….you are both just like Mama…you have Mama’s smile and her eyes…and even her hair, so all I have to do is look at you and I miss her a little less”

 

“But I can’t look at myself Mommy”

 

“I know, but you can look at Oscar….and you have loads of pictures of Mama everywhere…I know it’s not the same but it’s not forever”

 

“It’s not?”

 

“No, of course not princess, it’s just for a little bit until me and Mama agree for Mama to come home”

 

“But when Mommy?”

 

“I don’t know Princess…really soon I hope”

 

“I hope too Mommy”

 

“I know princess….” Looking at the TV, Clarke noticed the cartoon Oscar had put on was Tangled…again…Since Oscar had seen the film for the first time he’d watched it over and over again, to the point where he knew all the words to the songs along with the dialogue of most of the scenes. Sighing softly she looked at the Blu ray collection of films her and Lexa had brought since the twins were born. As she scanned, the collection her eyes fell on a Blu ray that she instantly knew would help her daughter miss her Mama a little less. Carefully standing herself up she placed Olivia on the couch, seeing the upset frown on Olivia’s face she softly said “One second princess”. Stepping forward she softly leant down, picking up the Blu ray removing tangled from the Blu ray player, hearing an upset moan from Oscar, placing the Blu ray in her hand into the player she pressed close grabbing the remote, she walked back over to Olivia lifting her daughter onto her lap and shuffling over to where had been sitting previously. “See sometimes watching films make me miss Mama a little less as well”. As she was, about to speak again the menu for the film came up revealing Baloo and Mogali to the twins, as soon as they both saw what was on the screen they yelled

 

“JUNGLE BOOK”

 

“I thought we could watch it together…it’s your favourite and Auntie Octavia hasn’t watched it in a long time”

 

“It’s Mama’s favourite too Mommy” Olivia softly sitting looking up at her Mommy, with a smile of happiness on her face.

 

“I know princess…it reminds me of Mama when I watch it, so maybe it’ll help you too”

 

“It will Mommy”

 

“It will?”

 

“Yeah” Olivia innocently smiled her hand over her mouth slightly as she looked up at Mommy. As Clarke pressed play on the remote and the film began playing Olivia turned herself on her Mommy’s lap, just enough so she could see that TV but still be leaning against her Mommy’s chest. Clarke turned herself a little as well at the same time, making it easier and more comfortable for her daughter to watch the film. As Olivia cuddled into her more, Clarke looked over at Oscar, seeing her had rested himself against his Auntie Octavia, looking over at her Oscar smiled softly waving at her. As the film played on Olivia grabbed her Mommy’s arm pulling it around her waist so she was holding onto her a little more. Placing a gentle kiss on the top of her daughters head, she looked down, watching her Olivia as the little girl paid full attention to the film on the TV. Inside she hoped that watching the film would ease her daughter’s longing for her Mama, though she knew it was unlikely, as it never worked for her.

* * *

 

  **Woods House –Hours Later -20:30**

Clarke returned to the living room where Octavia was sitting waiting for her to return from putting the twin’s to bed. They’d both had their baths, separately, and thankfully for Clarke neither of them had moaned or thrown a fit when they had to get out. Drying them and placing them in their pyjamas, Oscar had walked off to their bedroom jumping into their bed without any further encouragement needed from his Mommy. Olivia on the other hand was being extra clingy with her Mommy, Clarke was guessing it was a combination of missing her Mama and being scared she would have a nightmare is she went to sleep. Since she’s got Olivia dressed her daughter had almost jumped onto her chest, clinging onto her like a koala bear on a tree. Soothing holding onto Olivia, Clarke carried her into the twin’s bedroom lying her down in the bed, almost having to pry her daughter’s arms from around her neck. After talking her down a little, Olivia got into the bed crawling underneath the covers, looking up at her Mommy, seeing the slight fear in her daughter’s face she remembered Lexa’s trick from a few nights ago. She laid down in Olivia’s bed right next to her daughter, Olivia’s hand instantly moving to grip onto her Mommy’s shirt as she leant her head against her Mommy’s chest, slowly talking to her daughter she told Olivia to do as she’d done nights before and imagine all the things that she loves and that make her happy. She then instructed her daughter to close her eyes, which Olivia did without a fight; she then went on to tell her daughter all about Princess Clarke and her quest to defeat the evil King and Queen of Mission Hill. She continued with the story going into as much detail as she could imagine, before long she looked down at her daughter and she was fast asleep against her chest he breathing level.

 

Once she realised that she had been forgotten Oscar slightly, she carefully removed herself from her daughter’s grasp, walking over to Oscar’s bed seeing the little boy was still awake she’d ask him why, and he sweetly responded with ‘Can’t sleep without a kiss goodnight Mommy’. Clarke smiled brightly before leaning forward apologising to her son before placing a gentle kiss on his forehead, she was about to turn and walk out of the room when she stopped herself, telling Oscar she wanted Oscar cuddles. As soon as the words left her mouth, a massive smile appeared on Oscar’s face and he wriggled to the side making space for his Mommy to get into his bed. Clarke laid herself down next to her son, smiling a little more as he shuffled closer to her burying himself in his Mommy’s embrace. Speaking into her chest Oscar asked for a story, Clarke obliged being to tell him a similar story to the one she told Olivia, only this time she told the story the way she knew her son loved a story being told, with occasional songs and occasional fights and action. Soon enough, just like his twin sister, Oscar had fallen asleep against his Mommy his small hands loosely holding onto Clarke’s shirt. After laying there for about twenty minutes after Oscar had fallen asleep, not wanting him to wake up when she removed herself from his hold, Clarke carefully did just that, removing her son’s hands from her shirt before carefully gliding out of the duvet and off the bed. Once she was standing, she ignored the pins and needles walking quietly to the door, opening it and walking through it closing the door too behind her. Shaking her leg out a little, she had walked downstairs re-joining Octavia in the living room.

 

Just as she sat down Octavia stood up causing Clarke to send her a confused look “I’m gonna make us some coffee” She explained getting only a thankful nod from Clarke before the blonde leant her head back against the couch. Closing her eyes, Clarke kept them closed until she heard Octavia re-enter the room, realising she must have had her eyes closed for minutes and not seconds as it had felt to her. As she opened her eyes, she saw a half smiling Octavia walking towards her holding two cups of coffee, one red and one green. As she stopped in front of Clarke, she handed the blonde the green cup, smiling Clarke took the cup feeling the heat of the coffee instantly, seeing the steam coming from the cup she reached forward placing the cup on the table, that she had guessed Octavia moved back when she was upstairs. Sitting back, she turned to Octavia who had also placed her cup on the table, smiling softly she was about to speak when her best friend spoke first “I’m sorry I crashed your night”

 

“It’s fine O…I don’t really do much after the twins go to bed, except wait for them to wake up”

 

“I’m the same with Zachary…he wakes up at least twice in the night…he gets it from Rav….” Octavia stopped herself saying the name, almost as if it hurt her to say it aloud. Swallowing back softly she continued “Do the twins wake up a lot?”

 

“Not anymore, the first few months of Lexa not being here was hell though…Olivia wouldn’t sleep on her own, which I was kind of glad about because it meant I didn’t have to share with Roan on my own. …Even when she’d sleep in the bed with me, Olivia wouldn’t sleep all the way through, most nights I’d end up down her watching a Disney movie with her….some nights she wouldn’t want to watch TV so we would just lay on the couch…she’d hold onto me for dear life. Like if she let go I’d disappear…”

 

“I think Zachary may go through that as well”. Seeing the look of confusion on Clarke’s face she sat herself up a little straighter and explained, “The night after we stayed here, I put him to bed and about an hour later, he was awake, crying for his Mama…nothing I did helped until I put on an old home video on my phone. I managed to get it to stream to the TV and it calmed him down”.

 

“What home video?”

 

“Oh it was Zachary learning to walk….Raven had this massive smile on her face as he walked towards her. She was so proud of him, he fell over the first time he tried it because his arms were reaching for her so much. And then the second time he tried, he worked out his arms were the problem and he held them back until the last second, as soon as he was close enough to her his arms shoot out, and she was lifting him in the air…so proud and beaming, she looked like the happiest person in the world”

 

“I wish I’d thought of that…I’ve got loads of videos of Lexa and the twins on my phone...” Reaching forward, Clarke picked up her cup sitting back and taking a sip of the coffee before swallowing softly and continuing, seeing her best friend was completely silent: “I think it was too hard for me at the time…seeing those videos would have only made me miss her more. Anytime I thought about her it was bad enough, I can’t imagine watching videos of her would have helped me much”

 

“Believe me they don’t….Zachary made me watch every video I had on my phone, even that video we went you when we were on honeymoon”

 

“The one of Rae teasing Lexa for being stuck in the cold?”

 

“Yeah…he loved that one…he loved them all actually” Octavia paused for a second as she felt the lump growing in her throat as she thought about her wife and how much she’d missed her over the last two days. Reaching forward and picking up her cup she brought the cup to her lips taking a small sip before continuing “You know I thought I’d missed her before but that was nothing compared to this…every second of the day I expect to see her and every second I’m left heartbroken…and I know you probably think I deserve it…”

 

“I don’t think you deserve it O…I think you fucked up, like massively fucked up, but that doesn’t mean you deserve to feel pain or to go through heartbreak.”

 

“I do deserve it…Raven thinks I deserve it, and she’s right…this is all my own thought I should have just kept quiet”

 

“No you shouldn’t have, …you kept this a secret for a year O and look at how angry Rae is, imagine if it was years she would have been ten times madder and most likely she wouldn’t forgive on principle”

 

“Can I ask you something?”

 

“Sure”

 

“Thanks…and be honest please, like one hundred percent honest”

 

“I will be”

 

“Do you think Raven will forgive me or divorce me?”

 

“Honestly?” Clarke asked wanting to make sure that Octavia really wanted the truth, when Octavia nodded her head at her best friend she continued, “I don’t think she’d divorce you but I can’t be sure, I’m not Raven.” Seeing the disappointed look on Octavia’s face, Clarke continued on, “If there’s one thing I know it’s that she loves you, and if she thinks there’s a single inch of hope that she can forgive you, then she’s gonna be all over it…” Pausing for a second, she bit her bottom lip softly before continuing on deciding to give Octavia her full opinion. “I don’t think it’s about the kiss itself. …I think she’s upset and angry about the fact you lied…for more than a year, you’ve been seeing Monroe and lying about it since we’re were in High School O, that’s nearly ten years”.

 

“It wasn’t for the whole ten years Clarke”

 

“That’s not the point though is it O….you have to be accountable for your decisions, if you keep coming up with reasons and excuses, Raven won’t think about talking to you let alone forgiving you”

 

“I am accountable I accept my mistakes but it’s not that simple”

 

“That’s exactly what I’m talking about”

 

“What are you talking about Clarke?”

 

Clarke looked over at Octavia seeing the anger creeping into her friend’s face she let out a sharp breath before speaking “You want me to be One Hundred Percent honest right?” Octavia nodded her head “Well you can’t get angry or upset when you don’t hear what you want, alright?” Octavia again nodded her head, the anger disappearing from her face “You say you accept you’re accountable for everything…but you don’t own up”

 

“What do you mean? I said I accept I’m to blame”

 

“It’s not about blame, there’s more to it than that. It’s good that you accepted you are to blame, but everytime you do you give an excuse as to why you did it…Raven doesn’t want to hear that, not right now…”

 

“But she will?”

 

“Yeah, once the anger has faded away. Right now, you need to accept that you are responsible for what you did…and once the anger fades away she’ll let you explain why ...BUT you can’t make excuses, accepting responsibility means owning up saying you did it, and no matter the reasons that pushed you to it, you have to accept that. That means saying sorry and that you fucked up without saying there’s more to it or that it’s not that simple.”

 

“But there was a lot going on Clarke”

 

“You say that but you were meeting Monroe behind Raven’s back before Zachary was born, I know it’s not that simple and that there are other things involved but that’s what we’re dealing with here, it’s not the kiss or what lead to the kiss it’s the…”

 

“Lying” Octavia finished as if everything had hit her at once and she finally realised that she had been making excuses that didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. “I’m such a screw up; I’ve probably messed up everything”

 

“You might not have O, Raven knows what you’re like maybe she’ll find it easier to process, I can’t tell you for sure”

 

“What do you mean she knows what I’m like?”

 

“Exactly what it sounds like, she knows you and what your like?”

 

“No you meant something more Clarke, what did you mean?”

 

“You’ve always been the same O…” Seeing the unimpressed and mildly confused look on her best friends face, sighing she closed her eyes for a second before continuing and explaining herself “You always give excuses for everything wrong that you do. You always have since we were kids…I’m not saying that you don’t understand when you’re wrong, but it’s almost like you don’t know how to accept full responsibility for your actions.”

 

“I accept responsibility…”

 

“Yeah but you always have a reason…like Monroe kissed you but you pushed her away”

 

“But that’s what happened”

 

“Yeah but that’s the edited Octavia version…” Clarke instantly noticed the ‘whatever’ look on Octavia’s face, taking a sip of her coffee, she again explained further “Yes Monroe kissed you, and Yes you pushed her away…but what about everything in between…”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I mean, There had to be more to it, you said Monroe was telling you that you looked beautiful and just like when you were in High School right?” Octavia nodded her head “So she was flirting with you?” Octavia gave one nod “So if she was flirting with you, you had time to realise what she wanted, you knew she had feelings for you but you didn’t tell her to stop did you?” Octavia sadly shook her head “Then knowing she was flirting with you and that she had feelings for you, you went into a bedroom…my children’s bedroom, which by the way is NOT ok, you went in there alone with her knowing all of that. And then on top of that, there’s the fact that after she kissed you, you kept seeing her…how is Raven meant to know you didn’t sleep with Monroe, in the years you were secretly seeing her.”

 

“So you think I’m a liar?”

 

“That’s not what I said Octavia”

 

“It pretty much is”

 

“No it isn’t, your hearing what you want”

 

“Then explain to me what you meant Clarke”

 

“I meant that saying you own up and accept your responsible but you never own up to the fact that you could have stopped something happening at any point”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

 

“I mean, if you had never gone behind Raven’s back none of this would have happened. Whether you wanted to or not you lying and going behind Raven’s back, on something she was valid in wanting, set of a massive chain of events. I know that you didn’t mean it, but at some point you have to hold your hands up and admit you were wrong, and that you could have stopped it but for whatever reason you didn’t”

 

“I know I could have stopped so much happening but…”

 

“No buts Octavia…that’s the point, you had no reason to go behind Raven’s back especially before you both got married and before Zachary was born. I know you and if your honest with yourself it was because you didn’t like being told what to do, and you thought Raven was in the wrong. But instead of talking about it you did Octavia’s thing and ignored the reasons why”

 

“I only saw my side and not hers didn’t I?”

 

“Yeah you did”

 

“Arghhhhh, I should have just talked to her” Octavia let out as she threw her head backwards against the couch, resting it there before closing her eyes “I’m selfish, I know I am, but I didn’t think more of it, your right I only saw it from my side”

 

“I don’t think you did it on purpose O, I think that you had blinders on because you thought you were right. Now is the time you need to own up Octavia, because Raven isn’t going to even think about forgiving you until you take One Hundred Percent blame for not cutting things off before they got too bad”

 

“Your right, I need to tell her I’m sorry…” Octavia’s eyes shot open and she went to stand up clearly aiming for the door. Clarke quickly jumped up holding her coffee in one hand as she lunged forward gently grabbing Octavia’s wrist and pulling her back to the couch “What are you doing Clarke?”

 

“The worst thing you can do right now is to push Raven. She needs to come to you in her own time, and interrupting her time with Zachary isn’t gonna get her talking to you any sooner”

 

“Then what do I do Clarke? I can’t lose her, I just can’t….” Octavia let out as her emotions caught up with her and she began to let the tears fall, not forcing herself to keep them in just as she had done over the last two days. Clarke sat down next to her wrapping her right arm around her best friend’s shoulders, pulling her into a side hug, her left arm wrapping around holding onto her friend. Not saying another word, instead letting Octavia get out everything she was feeling at the chain of events she’d sent into play. 

* * *

 

** Lexa’s Apartment-02:30am **

Lexa was woken up from her spot on the couch, sitting herself up she looked around the room trying to remember how she’d ended up on the couch. Quickly she remembered that her and Raven had been watching a film, when Zachary woke up. Raven had done to check on her son and when her sister didn’t return after twenty minutes she walked into her bedroom seeing her sister and nephew fast asleep on her bed, Zachary was laying curled into his Mama’s chest holding on to her gently as his head was buried in her neck. Not disturbing the peaceful pair, she turned back around walking into the living room and continuing to watch the film her and Raven had started watching. She didn’t know how long after sitting back down that she fell asleep but she remembered seeing a text from Clarke telling her she’d call her in the morning and she was sorry. Lexa hadn’t thought too much into it and went back to watching the film, and now she had woken up and the TV was off her phone now on the table facing down. Reaching for her phone, she turned it over seeing two new messages from Clarke, reading them quickly:

 **22:03-‘Octavia is here and she’s upset’ 22:48-‘I’m sorry I’ll call you in the morning…I Love You xxx Goodnight’.** Smiling at the last message, noting that the time was now 02:30am, she stood herself up going to walk towards the twin’s bedroom, she stopped in her tracks when she noticed the kitchen light was on, the door was closed but the light was beaming through a small crack. Turning around she walked back towards the kitchen, carefully pushing the door with her right hand she heard small sniffles that she recognised as her sisters. Walking into the kitchen, she closed the door behind her, not closing it completely in case it made too much noise.

 

As she turned to face the inside of the average sized kitchen, her eyes came to rest on her sister sitting at the kitchen table her head resting on her arms on top of the table. Walking forward she sat down in front of Raven, the motion of her sitting down caused Raven to slowly lift her head up looking at her sister, tears rushing down her face. Lexa let out a small sad smile, reaching both her hands forwards she gently placed her hands on Raven’s cheeks using her thumbs to wipe away her sisters tears. As soon as she wiped the tears away more fell from Raven’s eyes, Lexa removed one of her hands, leaving the other on her sister’s cheek before letting it fall to the table, taking hold of Raven’s hand gently squeezing it;

 

“What’s going on Rae? …talk to me”

 

“I can’t stop thinking about them together and it’s driving me mad” Raven honestly responded the raw emotion clear for Lexa to hear in her voice. “It’s just on loop in my head” Lexa couldn’t say anything, nothing she’d think of would sound right, she knew no words she could come up with would make her sister feel any better right now. Instead of speaking, she reached her other hand forward, placing it over hers and Raven’s already connected hands, at the motion Raven reached her other hand forward placing it onto of the three hands on the table. Leaning her head forward she leant it gently against hers and Lexa’s hands, taking in some deep breaths she kept her head gently rested there for a few minutes before lifting her head back up. Taking in a deep breath, sniffing back and looking at her sister she let out a small laugh, causing Lexa to raise her eyebrow at Raven before asking;

 

“What’s amusing you?”

 

“It’s just…you’re always looking after me, ever since we were kids you’ve looked after me, and now here you are again looking after me”

 

“That’s my job Rae”

 

“Because you’re the older twin?”

 

“You know it…a whole 60 seconds little sis”

 

Raven laughed softly at Lexa’s words before her face turned serious, as another tear escaped her eyes she looked into Lexa’s eyes and softly said “Thank you”

 

“Don’t mention it….you wanna talk about anything, then you can go ahead you know that right?” Raven nodded her head at her sister “I know you like to hold everything in Rae but sometimes it’s better to talk through what you’re feeling”

 

“That’s it though Lex…I don’t understand what I’m feeling”

 

“What don’t you understand?”

 

“I want to hate her…and part of me does, for the lying, for going behind my back after I forgave her for sleeping with someone else, for not trusting me enough to tell me what she was feeling, for not owning up that she could have stopped all of this by thinking about me….for once…”

 

“But you can’t hate her can you?” Raven shook her head at her sister, fresher tears rushing down her cheeks as she thought about how much could lose “I’m not gonna patronise you Rae, but I’m gonna be honest…you can’t stop loving her, and the reason everything is hurting you so much right now is because you love her. Because you’ve given everything to her and she broke your trust in a way she should have never done.”

 

“How am I gonna get over this Lex? ... I can’t stop thinking about it and I can’t forget it for sure”

 

“One step at a time Rae, that’s how…By taking the good that you have with the undoubtable bad”

 

“Zachary…”

 

“Exactly, you still have a beautiful intelligent son, who loves the bones off you…and no matter how much you and Octavia fight and argue no matter what changes between you and her, one that will never change is that little boy…and the love that he has for you. The way he looks at you Rae there’s so much love there it’s insane, don’t forget that, don’t forget that no matter what he depends on you to be there, because he loves you”

 

“He’s my world Lex, you know that, everything I do is to make sure he doesn’t go through anything we did…and now it looks like he’s going to go through everything we did”

 

“No he isn’t, your nothing like Mom or Dad, no matter how much of a fuck up you think you are…” Lexa paused gripping her sisters hands a little tighter before continuing “You’re not…You’re an awesome Mama to him, and already you’re a million times a better Mother than ours was”

 

“You think so?”

 

“I know so, I see the love you have in your eyes for him, I’ve never seen you look at anyone like that before…and because of that I know you’d move the earth if you had to just for him…so now you have do what’s best for you, what makes you happy and what you can live with. If you can’t forgive and forget, and completely move on from this with Octavia then you have to let go Rae, because eventually you’ll begin to hate her for what she makes you feel. And the pain she reminds you of”

 

“And how do I get over the not knowing what I want part?”

 

“You take your time, and ask Octavia to give you it…if she knows that you need time, she’ll give it to you. And maybe talk to her first, get all the facts before you think on things…make her be completely honest with you”

 

“I don’t think I wanna hear it all, just thinking about it all makes me so angry…too angry Lex”

 

“Hey I know ok, but until you hear everything from Octavia your mind is gonna run off with itself, you need to hear her out and find out exactly what the hell she was thinking”

 

“And you’d be ok with me forgiving her?”

 

“Why wouldn’t I?”

 

“She was the reason Clarke never told you who she heard Nia’s lies from. If she’d been honest then Clarke would have been able to find out you didn’t do anything wrong sooner.”

 

“We can’t say that for sure Rae”

 

“But it’s highly likely”

 

“Maybe, but maybe not…there’s a lot of factors Rae…for a start Clarke could have asked O for more details straight away but she buried her head in the sand because she didn’t wanna face the potential truth…you can’t do that Rae”

 

“Why not? Burying my head in the sand sounds pretty good to me”

 

“Don’t be stubborn alright….I know your angry and upset, and believe me I’m not Octavia’s biggest fan right now but ignoring what’s happening won’t solve or make anything better Raven”

 

“I know ok….I know, I just don’t know how I’m gonna sit and listen to everything she has to say, I don’t think I can handle it”

 

“Of course you can Rae…We’ve handle worse”

 

“Together we have”

 

“Look if you want me to be in the next room I can, and if you feel like you’re losing it or you need to leave, then I’ll be there to get you out of whatever situation there might be”

 

“You don’t have to do that Lexa”

 

“I do…your my sister, my twin, the other half of me right?” Raven nodded her head softly looking at Lexa “Then whatever you need me to do I’ll do it ok?”

 

“Thanks”

 

“Don’t mention it” Lexa smiled out before standing up and pulling on her sisters hands until she stood up, untangling their hands she wrapped her arms around her sister “Just remember…I’ve got you ok?” Raven nodded into Lexa’s hug. Both staying as they were for minutes on end, tears running down both their cheeks, until Lexa pulled back wiping Raven’s face as Raven did the same to her. Keeping her left arm wrapped around Raven’s shoulders she pulled her gently towards the kitchen door “Now let’s watch a late night movie, get in some twin time” She let out as they walked to and through the door. Mentally she made a note to text Clarke back letting her know they’d be over in the morning. As her and Raven entered the living room Lexa pull Raven a little closer playing a gentle kiss on the side of Raven’s head as they walked into the living room to enjoy a late night movie together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So FINALLLLLLYYYYYY The chapter's on this site match the chapter's on FanFic. 19 chapters uploaded on both sites, yay I'm so happy that's out the way....I am currently working on Chapter 20 and it should be uploaded on Monday Night or Tuesday Morning. Anyways, as always please feel free to comment on any of the chapters :-)
> 
> Also I am thinking about putting in some Sex scenes and some Flashbacks, but personally, I think I suck (no pun intended) at writing sex scenes. So I am looking for co-writers or whatever their called I heard the word Beta but I have no bloody idea what that means hahaha anyways if anyone is interested please let me know somehow :-) Of course if someone wanted to help me write these scenes, I would give you credit along with perhaps giving you a bigger idea of the direction that the story is going to help you write :-) But I'll stop talking now and as I said If your interested then let me know…Thanks


	20. Talk Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven and Octavia talk things out. Plus a little Clexa time :-)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone :-) Hope your all have an awesome week.
> 
> I wanna apologise for the late posting of this chapter I posted it on Fanfic on Monday and I thought I'd posted it here but turns out I didn't haha On that note Thank you to: Queen_Ware32 your comment was actually what led me to check the chapters and as a result realise I hadn't posted this one. So thank you :-)
> 
> Also A Massive Thank you to everyone who has left a comment or kudos on the last chapter they are all greatly appreciated :-D

* * *

Chapter 20-Talk Time

 **Woods House-07:40am**  
Clarke had been awake since around 6am when Olivia had crawled into bed with her wanting Mommy cuddles after she’d woken up from a good night’s sleep. Clarke had of course obliged with her daughters request lifting her onto her chest and letting her daughter lay on top of her, her small hands gripping onto her Mommy as she slowly drifted back to sleep. Clarke didn’t have the heart to move Olivia, but also couldn’t go back to sleep, her mind thinking back to the message Lexa had sent her at about 3am that morning, telling her she and Raven were coming over first thing so Raven and Octavia could talk things out. The more she thought about seeing Lexa the more awake she became, the natural excitement filling her body, the same excitement she had always had when seeing Lexa, but now they were officially trying to get back to where they used to be a year ago, something about seeing Lexa was different, like there was more hope inside her. Looking down at Olivia sleeping on her chest she couldn’t wait to see the surprised look on her daughter’s face when she saw her Mama in the morning, the thought alone made a smile appear on her own face. Forcing herself to keep still, Clarke had continued to watch her daughter, watching every single movement Olivia made in her sleep, including that small nose cringle she knew her daughter got from Lexa. She stayed like that until 7am when Olivia woke up, within seconds Oscar came tiredly walking into her bedroom, rubbing his eyes as he said good morning to his Mommy and sister. Oscar jumped up onto the bed cuddling with his Mommy and sister for about twenty minutes before all three of them agreed to go get some breakfast. By 7:30am the twins were sitting at the kitchen table drinking their glass of juice whilst Clarke made them some cereal, they had both opted for Cheerio’s rather than toast or anything else. As she placed the bowls on the counter, grabbing the box of cereal from the cupboard in front of her, Octavia entered the kitchen walking to pot of coffee Clarke had placed on the middle island:

“I so need this”

Clarke looked at her friend laughing softly before instantly remembering she hadn’t told Octavia about Raven coming over this morning, mainly due to the fact she’d got the message once in bed. Pausing what she was doing she turned around leaning against the counter she looked at her best friend softly saying “I forgot to mention…” Octavia turned around looking in Clarke’s direction having heard the blonde speak “Raven is coming over this morning with her sister…” Clarke said not wanting to give the surprise of their Mama coming away to the twins “So consider this a heads up, they could be here anytime…” If she didn’t know how much seeing Raven meant to Octavia, Clarke would have laughed at the look of surprise on her best friends face

“Are you being serious?”

“Yeah, I got a text at 3am”

“And she wants to talk to me?”

“I think so, from what I could gather from the text message, yeah”

“Why are you only telling me now?” Octavia let out trying to down her coffee unsuccessfully “I need to get ready”

“I didn’t wanna wake you O, I was asleep when I received the message, I’m sorry….Look why don’t you take the coffee with you upstairs, get dressed and then brush your teeth…ok?”

“Yeah…your right I have time, I just need to stay calm and get the smell of beer off me”

“Exactly….so relax and go get dressed, you can even shower if you want, and I have clothes that will fit you in my bottom draw…so please just relax ok?”

“Yeah….yeah….I’m good…I’m relaxed…I’m going…” Octavia let out holding onto her cup of coffee and absentmindedly walking out of the kitchen, much to Clarke’s slight amusement. Peaking her head around the corner, she saw Octavia go up the stairs talking to herself as she did so.

Clarke let out a single laugh before shaking her head softly and returning to what she was doing at the counter, pouring the cereal into both bowls. Picking them up she carried them over to Olivia and Oscar who were watching her every move. Placing the bowls on the table in front of her children, she smiled when Oscar excitedly kicked his legs against his chair:

“Thank you Mommy” The twins said in unison as they looked up at her smiling before they both looked to the cereal seeing a vital ingredient missing, seeing the looks she let out a small laugh before leaning down and softly saying

“I’ll get the milk now”

“THANK YOU MOMMY” They both shouted in excitement, Clarke laughed at the twin’s happiness before walking over to the fridge removing the carton of milk before closing the fridge again, opening the drawer near the dishwasher she pulled out two small spoons realising she hadn’t got spoons out yet. Carefully carrying all three items over to the table she placed them down, as she placed the items on the table the doorbell rang out through the house. Turning her attention to the door she looked down at her jogging bottoms and loose Twin records t-shirt, cursing herself for not getting ready before getting the twin’s breakfast. “Stay here and no pouring the milk until I get back ok?” Olivia and Oscar nodded their heads at their Mommy, smiling at them both she turned walking towards the door stopping and trying to make her hair look a little better than it was at present.

Taking a deep breath in she looked at herself in the reflection of the mirror of the front door, seeing two figures moving about through the door she quickly stepped forward, turning the door handle before pulling the door open, her eyes falling on an immaculate looking Lexa. Her hair tied back into her signature braid, whilst she wore a black vest with her leather jacket over it and skinnyish blue jeans, her wedding ring visible on her left hand. Clarke would have continued looking at her wife but her vision was broken by Zachary running into her line of vision.

“Auntie Cla…” He let out running into her legs, his voice bubbling with happiness and excitement, he continued running until he hit Clarke’s legs wrapping his arms around them making her smile and laugh softly

“Hey buddy…you’re a happy bunny aren’t you?”

“Sorry about that….he’s been awake since 6 and his cereal may have kicked into high gear about an hour ago” Raven explained smiling and softly waving at Clarke, it was not Clarke noticed Raven standing there wearing Skinny black jeans and a plain black Superdry women’s t-shirt with her leather jacket over it. Looking down Clarke now noticed both women were wearing Black Nike trainers, their footwear and jacket wear matching as they always did. Smiling at the sight, she looked up at Raven softly smiling

“It’s fine, I’ve had worse with the twins” She smiled walking away from the door with Zachary by her side. Lexa and Raven walked into the living room smiling softly at Clarke, Lexa turned around closing the door behind her making sure it was locked. “The twins are eating breakfast if you wanna go through, O is getting ready...” Raven nodded taking Zachary’s hand and walking through to the kitchen. Clarke was about to do the same thing when she felt Lexa’s hand on her arm. Turning around she was about to say something when she noticed Lexa looking behind her looking behind her she softly asked “What?”

“Nothing just checking the coast is clear”

Clarke cocked her right eyebrow not understanding what Lexa was talking about “Wha…” Before Clarke could utter another word, Lexa had leant forward connecting their lips gently, her hands cupping Clarke’s cheeks as their lips connected, it took Clarke not even half a second to kiss Lexa back. After no longer, than thirty seconds Lexa pulled back smiling down at Clarke, smirking slightly as she said:

“Good Morning”

“Morning” Clarke goofily let out, leaning forward and reconnecting her lips with Lexa’s for a second before pulling back. Not knowing what else to say she pointed to the kitchen she softly said, “They don’t know your coming, I wanted to surprise them so we should head in there”

“Sure…I just wanted my morning kiss” Lexa didn’t miss the genuine smile on Clarke’s face as the Blonde looked at her. “Nice shirt by the way” Clarke quickly looked down at her shirt her cheeks blushing slightly

“Sorry I look a mess, I haven’t had a chance to get dressed”

“Don’t apologise…you look great” Clarke smirked at Lexa leaning up kissing her again, this time connecting their lips for a few seconds smiling into the kiss before pulling back. Stepping back, Lexa held her hand up for Clarke who quickly took hold of it, laughing softly and pulling her wife in the direction of the kitchen as she walked into the kitchen she noticed Zachary and Raven sitting in between the twins who were happily talking to their Auntie as they ate their cereal. Lexa smiled at the image before softly speaking “You started eating without me?” At the sound of her voice the twin’s heads spun quickly in Lexa’s direction both of them let out an excited giggle as they jumped down from their seats shouting

“MAMA” They both ran at her full force, as she watched her kids running towards her Lexa knelt down on the floor releasing her hand from Clarke’s. Olivia and Oscar ran as fast as they could until they hit their Mama’s chest wrapping their arms around her at the same time, both pulling back at the same time and sweetly saying “Hi Mama”

“Hi” She softly said placing a gentle kiss on Oscar then Olivia’s cheek

“Is this a surprise Mama?” Oscar sweetly asked looking at his Mama with a toothy grin plastered on his face

“It is…..So what are you two eating?”

“Cheerio’s Mama” Oscar quickly responded giving her a toothy grin “Their delicious Mama”

“I bet they are…go on then go back to eating” Lexa softly said, Oscar didn’t need any further encouragement turning around and running back to his seat jumping up and continuing his conversation with his Auntie Rae. Olivia stayed near her Mama looking up at her smiling, seeing Olivia hadn’t moved Lexa softly asked “You can go eat to Princess”

Olivia shook her head softly at her Mama before softly staying “I wanna stay”

“With me?”

“Yeah”

“But Cheerio’s are your favourite”

“Mama’s my favourite person”

“I am? ….I thought your favourite person was Princess Clarke”

Olivia let out a small dirty laugh as she looked at her Mama then to her Mommy who was smiling down at her and her Mama “Yeah, you’re both my favourites Mama”

“That seems fair” Lexa smiled looking up at Clarke seeing the small smile on her wife’s face she looked back to their daughter “How about I sit with you and we can talk whilst you eat?” Olivia smiled brightly nodding quickly at her Mama’s question. Standing up Lexa held her hand out for her daughter, as soon as Olivia’s hand connected with her Mama’s she was pulling her towards the table excitedly stopping looking up at her Mama once they reached her chair. All three adults in the room laughed softly at the little girl’s behaviour, leaning down Lexa lifted Olivia into the air sitting down in the chair carefully placing her daughter on her chest. Olivia shuffled around on her Mama’s lap continuing to eat her breakfast whilst her Mama and Auntie Rae continued talking “You’re sure you wanna do this now?”

“I’m sure Lex…If I don’t I’ll keep putting it off and then I’ll never do it”

“Ok, only if you’re sure though”

“I am, and knowing you’ll be in here will help me more than you know, so thank you”

“You’re welcome…” Turning her attention to Clarke, Lexa softly spoke “Sorry for messaging you so late, and not confirming…Are you ok for them to talk here?”

“Of course I am, I want them to talk this out sooner rather than later”

“Thanks”

“You don’t need to thank me Lexa…this is your house as well…” Clarke noticed the smile on her wife’s face, almost as if hearing Clarke say those words made her day, Clarke felt herself beginning to stare at her wife, whose attention had turned back to their daughter, shaking her head softly she asked “Either of you want a coffee or a juice?”

“JUICE MAMA” Zachary shouted out wriggling on his Mama’s lap making her look down at him smiling softly “Juice Juice Juice” He repeated making her laugh softly at his actions

“Ok my little king, I’m sure if you ask Auntie Clarke she’ll give you some juice” Lifting her son and placing him on the floor she looked at his confused face. “Go ask Auntie Clarke for juice, Mama isn’t going anywhere”, Smiling at her Zachary turned rushing over to his Auntie Clarke, “I’ll have a coffee please Clarke, when you’re ready”.

“No problem…Lex?”

“Um yeah a coffee would be great thanks” Lexa softly responded not missing the slight smirk on Clarke’s face as she turned her attention to Zachary who had now reached her feet.

“How can I help little man?”

“Can have juice Auntie Clarke?”

“Wow….he said my full name” Clarke let out in surprise looking over to Raven and Lexa who were already looking at her having heard Zachary’s correct pronouncing of her name. He’d never been able to say Clarke before it had always been some version of her name, usually not including the K part of her name. Smiling brightly, Clarke knelt down so she was level with her nephew, who was looking at her intently waiting for her response “What juice would you like?” Zachary looked at her confused “Want me to show you the different ones?” Zachary nodded his head at the question, causing Clarke to gently lift him up onto her chest, carrying him the short distance to the fridge opening it and pointing to the juices in the fridge:

“THAT ONE” Zachary excitedly let out pointing to a carton of Apple Juice with one hand as he held onto his Auntie Clarke with the other. Leaning forward Clarke grabbed the carton, closing the fridge and handing the carton to Zachary who let out a small-excited giggle as she did, placing him on the ground she watched as he giggled and ran back to his Mama stopping as he reached her turning around and shouting “THANK YOU AUNTIE CLARKE”

“You’re welcome Zachary,” Clarke laughed out before turning her attention to making coffee for her Lexa and Raven. Within a few minutes she had successfully made the coffee’s carrying two cups over to the table placing them in front of Lexa and Raven getting a thank you from them both at the same time. Walking back and picking up her coffee, she walked back to the table she walked behind her son gently ruffling his hair making him laugh softly; sitting down on the chair opposite Raven, she placed the coffee in front of her. Looking at Lexa and Olivia, she noticed the pure happiness that her daughter was giving off. Looking to her son, she noticed he’d finished his cereal and was now talking his Auntie Raven’s ear off about cars or something; he was talking so fast she couldn’t keep up. Clarke looked at Olivia seeing her daughter had just finished her cereal and was gently pushing the bowl back, looking over at her Mommy she softly said:

“I finished Mommy”

“Ok Princess…just leave it there I’ll clean it later”

“I can do it Mommy”

“I know princess….but Mama is here so the dishes can wait can’t they?”

“Yeah” Olivia responded smiling brightly and nodding her head, turning to look up at her Mama she softly said, “Your magic worked Mama”

“My magic?” Lexa asked not sure what magic she had performed

“I don’t have bad dreams anymore Mama”

“That’s great princess”

“Mommy tells me the magic princess story before I sleep and the bad dreams stay away”

“See I told you….no nightmare can get passed Mommy cuddles and princess stories can they?” Olivia shook her head at her Mama smiling brightly:

“Are you staying Mama?”

“For a little bit yeah, me and Auntie Rae are gonna be here for a while then we’re gonna have to go to work”

“How long is a little bit Mama?”

“A few hours, I’ll be here until you go to nursery….but not when you come home”

“Can we talk on the phone before bedtime Mama?”

“Of course we can Princess”

“Ok Mama” Clarke and Lexa exchanged a look of surprise; Olivia had never reacted so calmly to hearing her Mama wasn’t going to be there when she got back. She usually would react sadly and on a few occasions would get really upset and start crying, but not today, she was calm and seemed ok with the fact her Mama wasn’t gonna be back today, almost like she finally knew that her Mama would always come back at some point. Before either of them could formulate words, Olivia softly asked, “Mama, can you take me to Nursery?”

“I don’t know Princess, when do you leave for Nursery?”

Olivia paused not knowing about time, instead she looked at her Mommy softly asking “Mommy what time do we go Nursery?”

“8:30 Baby…the same time Zachary goes”

Clarke and Lexa watched as Olivia smiled turning to look up at her Mama and softly saying, “8:30 Mama…can you take us Mama please?” Lexa looks to Clarke seeing the Blonde’s silent look of approval she smiles down at her daughter and speaks:

“Maybe me and Auntie Rae can take you, Oscar and Zachary to Nursery, and then Mommy and Auntie Octavia can have a rest day, if Mommy wants”

“What’s a rest day Mama?”

“It’s a day where you relax and don’t do anything”

“Yay….Mommy deserves a rest day”

“She does?”

“Yeah, Mommy looks after us and makes us food and drinks, and helps us get changed…and makes all the monsters go away…and she helps me brush my teeth when my hand hurts…and makes me smile when I’m sad…and keeps me safe from the bad strawberries…”

“That’s a lot of things”

“Yeah…and she does loads and loads more Mama”

“She does all that and more?” Olivia nodded her head as Lexa looked at Clarke she could see the blonde had tears forming in her eyes at her daughter’s words. Clarke didn’t realise her daughter paid so much attention to everything that she did “Wow….then I agree with you, Mommy deserves to have a rest day…” Looking up at Oscar she softly said “Ok Mister, me and Auntie Rae are taking you, Olivia and Zachary to nursery Sooooo that means you have to go get ready now ok?”

“Really Mama?” Oscar asked looking at his Mama; he hadn’t heard the conversation between his Mama and Twin sister. When his Mama nodded her head at him, his face filled with shock and happiness, jumping off his seat he ran around the table stopping in front of his Mama and Olivia. “I’ll get ready now Mama…don’t go without me please”

“I won’t I promise”

“Ok…Come on Livy”

Olivia looked at her brother letting out an excited giggle jumping down from her Mama’s lap as her feet hit the floor her and Oscar took off running towards the staircase, not even a few seconds passed when Olivia came running back into the kitchen running around the table. She stopped between Clarke and Lexa’s chairs, looking up at her Mommy pushing onto her tiptoes she softly said “I love you Mommy” She sweetly smiled at Clarke pursing her lips softly.

“I love you too Princess” Clarke almost shockingly responded leaning down and kissing her daughter lovingly on the lips. As she sat back up, she watched Olivia turn to Lexa and do the same thing, raising up onto her tiptoes as she looked sweetly at her at Mama and spoke:

“I love you Mama”

Lexa smiled brightly at her daughter as she pursed her lips, leaning down she kissed Olivia on the lips before wrapping her right arm around her daughter hugging her gently “I love you too baby girl”. Pulling back, she placed a gentle kiss on Olivia’s forehead before looking her daughter in the eyes and saying, “Now quickly go get dressed, and then maybe you can wear your leather jacket”. Olivia let out an excited gasp before quickly running from her spot in between her Mommies’ running out of the kitchen to catch up with her brother. Lexa sat back up looking at Clarke both of them slightly teary eyed at their daughters sudden and pure declaration of love. Taking a small quick breath in she decided to break the thick air in the room. “She totally gets that caring side from me” She let out seeing Clarke instantly laugh and raise her eyebrow at her

“Oh really? …I think she gets it from me”

“Please…she totally gets it from me”

“You wish, she gets a lot from you but that caring side is definitely me…”

“Clar….”

“She’s right Lex, you weren’t the most caring kid” Raven interjected smiling and winking at her twin, when Lexa turned her attention in her direction.

“Not to you I wasn’t, but to everyone else I was”

“That hurts me sis, really it does” Raven laughed out placing her hand over her heart faking a pain in her chest. Her face contort with laughter a few seconds after, as Lexa laughed along with her. After a minute of silence, Raven took a few gulps of her coffee before looking at Clarke and asking, “Can you trust them to get dressed on their own?”

“Sometimes, their good at picking out clothes, not so good at putting them away. Or putting them on quickly, unless you tell them it’s important, otherwise they take a while”

“They totally get that from you sis…” Raven let out giggling as Lexa rolled her eyes at her, letting out a small laugh as Clarke continued:

“I’ll go up in a few minutes and help them”

“I’ll do it” Lexa interjected looking over at her Clarke, as her wife went to speak she quickly continued “No arguments, you heard our daughter, you deserve a rest day” Clarke let out a small smile going to speak again “No thanks needed” Lexa added winking at Clarke making the blonde laugh and smile softly. Clarke softly shook her head leaning forward and grasping onto her cup taking a sip out of her cup, all three women in the room remaining silent enjoying their coffee’s as Zachary happily drank his carton of Apple Juice sat on his Mama’s lap.

A few minutes went past, just as Lexa was about to speak Zachary’s voice echoed through the kitchen “MOMMY” A small giggle escaping his mouth as he jumped off his Mama’s lap running at his Mommy his juice still firmly in his grip. Octavia smiled brightly at her son, dropping quickly and safely to her knees holding her arms open, within a second Zachary crashed against her chest wrapping his arms around her before pushing himself back looking at her “Hi Mommy”

“Hi baby boy…how are you?”

“Good”

“Yeah? …Did you have loads of fun with Mama?”

“Yeah, watch movies Mommy”

“Movies huh? What ones?”

“Minions Mommy loads Minions” Zachary smiled out bringing his carton of juice from behind his Mommy’s head, bringing the straw to his mouth and taking a small sip

“How did I know that huh?”

“My Favourite”

“It is…are you enjoying your juice handsome?” Zachary nodded his head giggling softly at his Mommy “Good, juice is good for you…but not too much right?” Zachary nodded again, moving forward and resting his head on his Mommy’s shoulder as he continued to drink. Octavia wrapped her arms around her son lifting him off the floor as she stood up herself. Walking to the only free chair she sat down, exchanging a glance with Raven still seeing the rage in Raven’s eyes. Softly she said “Morning Rae”

“Morning O” Was all Raven could manage to get out before Clarke spoke wanting to escape the tension in the room.

“Lexa, you better go help the twins before they empty the whole chest of drawers”

“I’ll come with you Lex…it’ll be quicker with the both of us”. Raven quickly let out, standing herself up seeing Zachary quickly lift his head up she leant forward so she was face to face with her son, not paying attention to Octavia for now. “Mama is going to help your cousins get ready…you stay with Mommy and I’ll be right back to take you nursery ok?” Zachary nodded his head resting it back on Octavia’s shoulder “Good boy” Raven smiled standing back up, looking at Octavia she could see the sadness and upset on her wife’s face, a look she hated seeing and being responsible for it. Taking a small breath in she softly said, “We will talk, just let me and Lex get the twins and Zachary to school and when we get back we’ll talk…I promise ok?” Octavia softly nodded her head unable to say a word back to her wife. She just watched as Raven turned around grabbing Lexa’s hand and forcing her to stand and walk with her. She continued watching as the twin sister walked to the stairs in the living room, she watched as Lexa playfully pulled her hand from Raven’s grip playfully pushing her sister’s shoulder, the two of them starting to shuffle playfully with each other, continuing for a few minutes until they broke part laughing before walking up the stairs together.

* * *

  
Woods House-10:13am  
Clarke and Octavia were sat in the living room waiting for their respective wives to return from dropping off their three children to the nursery. Even though Zachary was only in nursery for three days a week from 09:30am until 13:30am, it was better than nothing, Raven and Octavia both wanted their son to have as good of a transaction into full time nursery as possible and they found that putting him in the same nursery as the twin’s had worked. Even though they were in different classes, the twins would sit with Zachary at lunchtime and play with him at break time, looking after him every chance they got. And since he started at nursery they both noticed Zachary wasn’t as clingy as he used to be and he was way more playful and confident than when he started. The twins had been the same originally when they joined nursery but over the nearly two years they had been at MH Nursery, they had both come out of their shells. Though neither of them had been as shy as Zachary was, they had still blossomed more and more, developing their own little traits and mannerisms that made their Mommies’ laugh. As well as their vocabulary massively improving within the first, six months of them being there. Lexa had originally not been keen on placing the kids in an exclusive school, not wanting them to be spoiled, but she soon learned that all most all of the children that went there were from average families and that whilst it was an exclusive school it wasn’t a private school. The exclusive part was something she’d worked out meant, no spoilt brats, though Clarke insisted it was probably more complicated than that. Still they always agreed it was the best decision they could have made. Octavia originally hadn’t believed Clarke and Lexa about the twins blossoming until she saw itself with Zachary. He was always attached to her or Raven never wanting to place without one of them, but since he’d started at the nursery six months ago he’d completely blossomed and she had to admit it was an amazing thing to see her son change and evolve in front of her every day. And she had to admit having time on her own three days of the week was amazing for helping her work on designs.

After Lexa and Raven had gone upstairs, Octavia listened as Clarke gave a mini pep talk about her talk with Raven reiterating her point from the night before, until Zachary started wriggling on his Mommy’s lap wanting her attention. She’d turned her attention to her son giving him her undivided attention until Lexa and Raven returned, Raven’s hand was being firmly gripped by Oscar as Olivia clung to her Mama’s hand. Lexa went on to tell Clarke about how her and Raven had explain to Oscar why he couldn’t go to school in nothing but his boxers. She told her wife how their son complained about the warm weather outside, the four women laughed as Oscar defended himself to everyone. After talking downstairs for a few minutes, it was time for Lexa and Raven to take all three of the kids to nursery. Surprisingly the twin’s didn’t delay getting into the car like normal; instead, both of them seemed excited to get into their Mama’s car. Clarke thought nothing of it knowing they were probably excited to be going to nursery with their Mama something they hadn’t done for a while. Once the twin’s kissed her goodbye, Clarke watched them get into the car with Lexa, Raven and Zachary, waving the car off as Lexa reversed out of the driveway driving off towards the nursery. Once the car was out of view Clarke walked back inside, her and Octavia grabbing a coffee in the kitchen, beginning again to talk about how Octavia should approach talking to Raven. After about thirty minutes, they had stopped talking and made their way into the living room, Clarke insisting that Octavia needed to calm down before Raven and Lexa got back. They had been in the living room sitting on the couch talking about TV and their kids for the last 45 minutes. Until now, both of them stopped talking as the front door opened gently, revealing a laughing Raven and Lexa at something one of them had sad. As Raven closed the door behind her, the laughter slowly stopped in her and Lexa, as Lexa let out one final laugh before looking to Clarke:

“Hey, you two enjoy your rest time?”

“Yeah we did, we talked all things TV” Clarke responded knowing Lexa hated that TV show more than any person perhaps should

“Good….I think”

“It is very good, plus we talked about Oscar’s new obsession with wanting to go out half naked, Olivia’s new obsession of cuddling with me at the same time every morning….oh and Zachary’s new obsession with drinking juice”

“Sounds very relaxing yet productive…..me and Rae were just talking about dentures”

“I’m probably gonna regret asking but….why were you talking about Dentures?” Clarke asked amusedly raising her eyebrow at her wife, as Raven laughed softly taking a seat on the empty part of the couch near the front door.

“Right well…we were talking about how too much sugar can ruin your teeth after Rae had two coffees between us dropping off the kids and coming back. And Rae said she didn’t care about losing her teeth because she thinks that she could rock being 30 years old and having dentures…I told her she couldn’t because nobody loves dentures….that conversation led us to talking about some rather interesting benefits that could come with losing your teeth”. Lexa watched as the amusement filled Clarke’s face, she could see Clarke’s mind instantly turning dirty. Smirking and letting out a small laugh she added “Anyway I’m gonna grab a water, anyone want anything?” Lexa looked to Raven and Octavia neither of them responded smirking at Clarke, she turned walking towards the kitchen to get her water.

Clarke sat on the couch for a second her mouth slightly open as she looked at the now empty spot Lexa had been stood in moments ago. Quickly standing up shaking her head she looked quickly at Raven and Octavia softly explaining, “I want a drink…I’ll be two minutes” Walking into the kitchen she sees Lexa removing a bottle of water from the fridge her left hand holding the bottle as her right hand rested on the fridge door holding it open. Quickly moving forward Clarke snaked her arm around Lexa’s waist grabbing the bottle quickly stepping past Lexa, the brunette quickly turned around looking at Clarke in slight shock, after a second she softly laughed before reaching into the fridge again removing another bottle. She looked back to Clarke seeing the Blonde had now lifted herself onto the island counter, her back straightened out as she slowly drank from her water bottle. Lexa couldn’t help the smile that filled her face, she had a feeling that Clarke was being overly sexy on purpose, walking forward she shook her head at Clarke as she opened her own bottle drinking some slowly. As she pulled her bottle away from her mouth and placed the cap back on it, she moved to stand in front of Clarke:

“You’re a serious tease you know that?”

“Me?” Clarke let out raising her eyebrow at Lexa before she continued, “I’m not the one making sexual innuendos whilst talking about dentures”

“I didn’t make any innuendos at all”

“Well the way you were looking at me, told me something different”

“Ok maybe I knew you’d get the dirtiness of what me and Rae were talking about”

Clarke pushed Lexa’s chest softly “I knew it…and I’m the tease” She finished as Lexa laughed stepping forward, her hands naturally moved to rest on the island counter right next to Clarke’s outer thighs carefully placing the bottle on the island pushing it to the side slightly. At the same time Clarke naturally placed her hands on Lexa’s shoulders, her arms moving forward so her forearms were resting gently on Lexa’s shoulders allowing her to hold the bottle behind Lexa’s head.

“Ok….I maybe wanted to get Octavia and Raven alone so they could start talking”

“And just asking to talk to me in here was too obvious”

“Exactly…see I knew there was a reason I loved you so much”

“Nothing to do with the two children and eight years we’ve had together”

“Well those two I suppose”

“Sure…so don’t I get an apology?”

“Nope”

“Why not?”

“Because maybe I like seeing you get all horny, and I’m not sorry for that”

“I was not horny Lexa”

“Ok so maybe you weren’t horny but you were certainly having dirty thoughts”

“Maybe I was and maybe I wasn’t”

“Maybe huh?” Clarke nodded her head at Lexa’s question, making the brunette smirk softly at the action. “Well as long as I’m involved then I’m ok with maybe….I think I am anyway” Lexa moved forward as Clarke pulled her wife closer until her mouth was at Lexa’s ear

“I only have dirty thoughts about you”

“Oh yeah?” Lexa asked raising her eyebrow at her wife as she pulled her head back slightly “How often do you have these dirty thoughts?”

“Mmmmm not a lot”

“Really? ….”

“Ok so maybe a lot more in the last month or so”

“But not before….” Lexa instantly noticed the sad look creep onto Clarke’s face, relaxing back a little more she looked Clarke in the eyes, realising that her comment may have upset the blonde slightly “I’m sor…”

“You don’t need to apologise…When I kicked you out, I blocked everything that was to do with you, I ignored the little traits the twins got from you, and I ignored everything that reminded me of you and how much I missed you…in every possible way…”

“You mean….like even sexually?” Lexa couldn’t help the smile that slowly spread across her face at the thought.

“Yeah, the first month of two I’d…I’d masturbate thinking about you but it would make me feel terrible, because I’d finish and turn to look at your side of the bed and I’d end up crying…so I decided that blocking you out in every possible way was the only thing I could do”

“You don’t need to tell me all of this Clarke”

“I know but I want to…” Clarke responded bringing her right hand too gently play with the hair of the side of Lexa’s head, just above Lexa’s ear. “I knew that if I didn’t block you out then I would give in because there isn’t one thing I don’t love about you, even when you leave hickeys all over me…” Clarke’s comment made Lexa laugh as she remembered the numerous times during High School she’d left hickeys on Clarke’s neck, shoulders or torso. “But thinking about all that stuff made me want you back home….and I didn’t know at the time you were being honest, I didn’t think that you were being honest….when Niylah cheated on me, it broke a lot inside me and I guess just putting it off was my way of avoiding the anger I was feeling. So when Octavia told me what Nia said, I didn’t want to risk it again, letting someone walk all over me just because I loved them”

Lexa looked into Clarke’s eyes, all the times she’d talked about Niylah cheating on her there had been this glint in her eyes as if she was hiding something, so Lexa never pushed it not wanting to upset Clarke more, she knew most of the details anyway so she wasn’t sure what Clarke could be missing out. However, today something was different there was a different look in Clarke’s eyes as if she was finally ready to talk about it “There was more to her cheating wasn’t there?” Clarke nodded her head softly, instantly Lexa’s mind ran off thinking about the endless possibilities of what Niylah could have done to Clarke, instantly the fear rose in her and she worriedly asked, “She didn’t hit you or force you to do anything did she?”

“No, nothing like that Lex…” Clarke soothingly added moving her left hand to gently rest on Lexa’s collarbone knowing this action always calmed her wife slightly. “The person she slept with…”

“That Finn kid from your class?”

“Yeah…well he wasn’t the first; he was the last in a few…”

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah, she cheated on me for almost all of our relationship…and with at least four different people…” Clarke looked into Lexa’s eyes seeing the brunette was fully concentrating on her as she processed the information being given to her “There was Finn from Art, then there was Roan of course, Echo….and the last person she told me about was”. Clarke paused for a second as a tear escaped her eyes; even nearly ten years later thinking about the betrayal made her angry and sad “Wells…”

“WHAT? ….No way, he wouldn’t do that to you”

“That’s what I thought, Niylah never told me who the fourth person was until we got together…Wells was acting strange, he said it was weird I was so into you after a few months of knowing you. He started some stupid argument with saying I always choose someone else over him, he said that was why he did it, I didn’t know what he meant but thankfully…” Clarke sarcastically let out with a single laugh. “Niylah was nearby, when I asked what he meant by it he wouldn’t say, so Niylah stepped forward and told me he was the fourth person she slept with, because he was right I always choose someone else over them, she told me I deserved it. ...I thought she was lying until I looked at his face…and I realised it was true” Clarke noticed the look of anger on Lexa’s face, she wasn’t able to say anything else as Lexa spoke;

“I’m gonna hurt him”

“No you’re not Lexa” Clarke let out a small laugh, taking hold of Lexa’s right hand with her right, their arms resting on Clarke’s lap gently. Lexa reached up with her left hand gently wiping away her wife’s tears

“I hate that he did that to you”

“I know you do…but I can’t change it…” Clarke took a small breath in before explaining why she suddenly let out all this information “I was talking to Dr Kane and he said that he thinks that’s where me thinking that you cheated on me because I deserved to be cheated on thing…comes from. He thinks that because my best friend from childhood betrayed me it made me subconsciously think that anyone I trusted that much would do the same…he told me that I needed to be one hundred percent honest with you, I just didn’t know how to bring it up to you in conversation”

“Thank you….for telling me, I know it can’t have been easy thinking about it again”

“It’s easier now than it would have been months ago…something changed”

“What exactly changed?”

“You…again…” Clarke let out a small laugh seeing the slight confusion on Lexa’s face “Since we had the talk, things have been amazing between us…allowing myself to feel everything I still felt for you. It made everything feel so much clearer like I was at the end of storm, I know it’s cheesy but it’s true…so much of me being me comes from loving you and the twins, and when I shut off everything for you I didn’t really feel like me, everything was just so routine and plain. And when we started talking and you’d come and see the twins, things felt great and normal”

“Did the kissing help as well?”

“Maybe a little bit…” Clarke smiled making Lexa smirk softly at her “Then Dr Kane asked me to talk about you, so I did. He said that he’d never seen anyone smile some much when talking about anyone, I told him about how you stood by me through everything even how Niylah attacked you because of me…he said it sounded like you were an amazing person, that sent me on another ramble that led to the twins and our family.”

“I didn’t know you talked about me in therapy”

“I talked about everything that I felt bothered me and made me shut things off”

“Did it help?”

“It’s helped massively; we’ve talked about a lot. He told me that my postpartum is what’s been making me feel the way I have, so unworthy of your love, and of the twins. He explained why I was feeling the way I was, and he told me how to handle it better, and the one thing he was adamant about was me opening up to you again.”

“Well please remember to thank him”

“I will….but seriously Thank you”

“What for?”

“For not giving up on me…and forgiving me for not trusting you…I love you so much and I am so so so so so so so so so happy that we’re getting back to how we used to be”

“Even though that a lot of so’s…Me too….oh and for the record I love you too” Clarke smiled brightly at Lexa’s words, and for a second Lexa found her breath caught in her lungs, for some reason Clarke opening up to her made that smile even more breathtaking than normal. Without a second thought she leant forward, gently capturing Clarke’s lips with her own, Clarke instantly kissed her wife back wrapping her left arm around Lexa’s neck pulling her into her more, naturally deepening their kiss. After a minute or two, they both pulled back taking a breath in she looked at Clarke honestly saying, “You know…I’ve really missed you the last few days”.

“You have?”

“Yeah, things feel different somehow; I don’t think I can explain it”

“I know what you mean, since we had the talk things feel like they used to, more intense and pure I suppose. Like it used to be before everything got crazy” Lexa leant forward kissing Clarke on the cheek, the blonde smiled and continued “It’s strange, I think I’ve missed you more over the also two months than I have the whole year…is that bad?”

“No. I know how you mean it. When we were apart, I concentrated so much on being angry and on just getting through most days without thinking of you and the twins. That I stopped feeling most of the time, the only time I’d think was when I was alone, so I threw everything I had into producing and making tracks, writing lyrics and rearranging old songs to make new ones, then I didn’t have a chance to miss you let alone anything else. It made it so easy to hate you for not believing me”. Seeing the look of shame of Clarke’s face, she quickly pecked her wife on the lips, smiling and continuing, “But then, you called me when Oscar was sick, the upset in your voice made everything come flooding back, then things changed with everyday that went passed and the more I’d see you… .But I never once stopped loving you…I just had to block it out so that I could function…so missing you wasn’t really something I had a chance to experience. But now, knowing that we’re back together and working on things…along with our make out sessions, everything I do I’m thinking about you and when I’ll see you next. Even if its just for a second so I can hug you and feel you, so that I know it real and I’m not dreaming…”

“Wow, that’s how I feel most days, like your gonna show up and things are gonna be like they were months ago. I couldn’t stand that….but now I am almost One Hundred Percent sure that this isn’t a dream…”

“Almost?”

“Yeah, I’m about 99% sure it isn’t a dream”

“99% sure huh?” Clarke nodded her head leaning forward kissing Lexa gently on the lips before pulling back smiling at her wife “What can I do to make it 100%?”

“There’s only one thing you can do”

“And what is this one thing?”

“Move back home”

\-------

* * *

  
 **In the Living Room-20 Minutes Ago**  
After Clarke and Lexa had left the room, obviously the two were giving them space to talk. Raven stayed sitting where she was not moving or thinking about anything. Until after about five minutes when the silence in the room became too much for her. Looking over at Octavia, she noticed the nervous look of her wife, her hands shaking softly and tears built in her eyes sitting near the end of the couch that was near the TV. The same place she was sitting when she was talking to Clarke, and when Raven and Lexa returned to the house. Her attention was completely on the finger that held her wedding ring. Raven noticed that look; she knew it all too well, knowing that look meant Octavia was shutting herself off, and once she’d shut there would be no talking to her for hours. Standing up she took a breath knowing that if she wanted answers it was now or never, walking forward slightly she sat in the corner of the couch, feeling she was close enough to her wife to hear her out but far enough away to have time to walk away if she got too angry. Taking another breath in, she spoke:

“So, let’s talk yeah?”

Octavia’s head popped up, Raven’s voice breaking through all the thoughts she was having in her head at the moment. Turning her attention to Raven she half-smiled “Yeah” Pausing for a second she didn’t know who should start but she guessed it should be here “Where exactly do you wanna start?”

Raven forced herself not to start off with a smart commented of ‘How about we start where you broke our vows?’ she knew if she opened with that Octavia would go into self-defence mode. So instead, she responds with “How about why you continued seeing Monroe behind my back?”

“You want me to be completely honest with you?” Raven nodded her head softly. “I never really stopped seeing her…” Octavia spotted the instant flash of anger in Raven’s eyes, instantly knowing what she was thinking she continued, “Not like you’re thinking I promise, just hanging out…it wasn’t always just me and her, most of the time it was a group of us, me, and her, Jasper, Monty and Harper. They all thought you were being a little jealous and protective so they would agree to be there so that if you showed up, you wouldn’t think it was weird or that me and Monroe were doing something behind your back. I’ve only ever slept with her once, and it’s going to stay like that for as long as I live. Me and her were friends for a long time Rae, I couldn’t just stop being friends with her….But I told her that we were only friends that no matter how she felt about me I didn’t feel that way back”

“So I’m meant to believe that for eight years you hung around behind my back as nothing more than friends, that she only crossed the line once in all those years”

“No, because she crossed it more than once”

“WHAT?”

“Wait ok, don’t get angry please, just let me explain”

“Fine, explain it to me”

“It was about a week before prom and I was dress shopping with my Mom and Ontari, Ontari needed the toilet so my Mom took her, then Monroe appeared, she helping Fox pick out a dress for prom night. When she saw me I was trying on this emerald green dress, I wanted that colour because it’s your favourite, I was looking in the mirror and she told me I looked stunning. The way she was looking at me, I knew she meant it differently than a friend would. I walked back into the changing room and she followed me, I told her to get out but she told me everything she felt about me, how she loved me and wanted to be with….she told me you weren’t good for me, that you were gonna be a drunk just like your mother and cheat like your father. I told her she was wrong, that she didn’t know how amazing you were, how you’d changed my life in months and made me a better person, something she couldn’t even dream of doing. She pushed me against the wall, told me I was only saying it to get her to leave, and that no matter what she would love me forever. Then she tried to kiss me….”

“Tried?”

“Yeah, I stamped on her foot and pushed her out of my way. When I got out of the dressing room, my Mom and Ontari were back and Ontari wanted to show me a dress, so I let her pull me to where it was. Monroe spoke to my Mom and then disappeared, the next time I saw her was Prom night and she apologised”

“Why the hell didn’t you tell me?”

“Because you were still angry at me, no matter how much you told me we’d moved forwards and everything was fine…You still had this look in your eyes sometimes, like you didn’t one hundred percent believe me or trust me.” Octavia looked into Raven’s eyes seeing the anger had faded away slightly. She continued her story “But then there were times you’d look at me like I held the whole world in my hands…as if I held your whole life in my hands, your eyes would light up and this smile would spread across your face, and I’d feel like I was the only person that mattered in the world. Like I was worth something…”

“You are worth something O…you always were”

“I know, I’m not gonna pretend I didn’t know I was important Rae, because that would be lying and I’ve done enough of that to you” Octavia noticed they small thankful smile that appeared for a second on Raven’s face before it disappeared, replaced with a focused look. “I also kept it from you because I was stupid enough to believe that if you didn’t find out you’d trust me quicker, and it was easier for me to try and forget about it if you didn’t know…I was selfish, looking aback if I told you then maybe you would have trusted me a little more because I told you the truth.”.

“Did she try anything else, after that?”

“Not until a couple years later, but after that incident I didn’t risk being alone with her. So for the rest of High School I just hung around with you, Clarke and Lexa. Plus, I enjoyed being with as much as I could.”

“So you didn’t really wanna hang out with us?”

“I did, but normally I’d be in-between groups but Monroe made me feel uncomfortable, and you made me feel….like me, like I belonged with you…”

“If she made you feel uncomfortable, why did you still meet her after High School?”

“I didn’t…” Seeing Raven’s unbelieving look, the same look she hates seeing on her wife’s face, she continued, “Not for a few years, the next time I saw her was after you proposed to me, she told me she’d heard about it and she was happy for us. She apologised for being weird with me, she told me she was in love with me and didn’t know how to deal with me not loving her back. I accepted her apology, I didn’t think she still had feelings for me, plus we didn’t see each other that much, she’d message me occasionally but we were in our last year on University, I didn’t think too much into it because we had other things to worry about.”

“So when did the meeting up start again?”

“Just before I got pregnant, she called me really upset; she just broke up with her girlfriend and asked if I could met her to talk. So I agreed. I thought it was innocent meeting between friends, I didn’t think you’d me meeting her either but I honestly didn’t think it was a big deal…We met at The Arkadia Café and we just talked, I told her that everything was great between us. She asked how the wedding had gone and I told her how amazing it was, how perfect everything was. She told me she was happy for us, that I made the best choice because we were made for each other. She didn’t even remotely say she still had feelings for me, I promise you Rae…” Octavia responded her eyes pleading with Raven to believe her, then without warning Raven reached her hand forward gently taking a hold of Octavia’s hand.

“It’s ok, I believe you”

“You do?” Octavia asked in slight disbelief, Raven nodded her head softly at the question “Ok. After that time we didn’t met up until I was three months pregnant, my car broke down and I called Jasper asking for him to send someone from his garage and Monroe showed up, she towed the car and let me come back to the garage, she said it wouldn’t take long to fix so I waited. That’s when she asked if I was ok, I asked why and she said that I was glowing, I laughed and she asked what was funny and I told her I was pregnant and didn’t think anyone actually said that. She congratulated me and nothing seemed weird, she fixed the car and I came back home. Occasionally she’d message me to see how things were going, it was nothing more than friendly messages. Not until I was about 7 Months gone, you and Lexa went out clubbing, and I stayed with Clarke here, I just spoke to you and you were telling me how much you loved me and how I was the best thing that ever happened to you. Once you hung up the phone about twenty minutes passed by and she texted me; I thought it was an innocent text until I opened it up and it was a picture of you and some women hugging. Then a message came a second after saying how you were a cheat and I shouldn’t have chosen you over her, you basically accused you of cheating on me, I didn’t believe it, there was something about the women in the picture that looked similar. Anyway, literally five minutes later you called me back and told me that you’d bumped into Emori on the dancefloor, I realised that’s why the woman you were hugging looked familiar, I didn’t think anything more of it, I mean she’s your cousin of course you hug her.” Octavia noticed the small smile on Raven’s face as she continued, “Anyway that whole night she kept messaging me, saying some nasty stuff about you, after a while I got annoyed and turned my phone off, then you and Lexa came back and that was it.”

“How did you go from strange messages and false accusations to meeting up with her in a restaurant?”

“I turned my phone back on the next day and I had about thirty text messages from her, all declaring her love for or being abusive to you in some way or another. I told her to leave me alone, and didn’t hear anything for a week, then she apologised, she told me she was drunk and didn’t mean any of it. I accepted her apology but I distanced myself from her.”

“And then?”

“And then we had Zachary and everything slowly began to go downhill…for me, I know now looking back that you were trying so hard and I was just looking forward not seeing everything that you were trying to do. I didn’t see at the time, so I continued talking to her, when Zachary was about four months old, I took him to the supermarket with me and we bumped into Monroe, we chatted as I shopped and then we went and had a coffee in the supermarket café, we just talked and I swear things stayed like that until the night of the party…”

“Nothing what so ever, no flirting, no suggestive messages?”

“Not that I thought at the time, but looking back now, there were signs. I know you don’t wanna hear this Rae but I’m not gonna lie to you. Looking back, I see things differently, I see the signs where I should have told her to stop or that it wasn’t ok”

“Why didn’t you at the time?”

“Because I didn’t see it and honestly I liked the attention, I felt so alone and like it was me against the world, I guess I just let that get to me. And I guess I enjoyed the attention as well, you barely touched me those few months Rae, I felt like you didn’t want me anymore. Like the one thing I thought would bring us together even more, actually tore us apart forever.”

“So you let her kiss you?” Raven asked her face scrunching up a little as she asked the anger clear for Octavia to see in her face. The tears bubbling slightly in Raven’s eyes.

“No…I swear to you Raven, I didn’t kiss her back….and I didn’t want to either. I was just about to push her off me when you walked into the room. I know you probably find that hard to believe but I swear it’s the truth, I hate the thought of anyone but you kissing me. You’re the only person I want to be that close to”

“So you don’t want to be with her, you’re not in love with her, you don’t feel something back for her. Nothing like that?”

“No never”

“You just liked the attention?”

“As pathetic and selfish as it sounds….Yes. I know how it sounds but it was nice, I never once stopped loving you or wanting to be with you, because I will always want that and you…but it was nice, and I guess if I’m really honest I just needed that attention to make me think like I used. It sounds stupid but when she would complement me I felt like I was a teenager again, like I was still perfect…”

“You are perfect O” Raven paused for a second looking into Octavia’s eyes “Why didn’t you ever come to me, and tell me that you were struggling?”

“I honestly didn’t think you cared anymore…I didn’t know that you were cleaning whilst I was asleep, and that you were feeding him and looking after him all night so I could get some sleep. I just felt like you loved music and Zachary more than me”

“You were jealous?”

“If I’m truly honest, then yes. I know that’s a terrible thing but I had no idea how to handle things, or what to say to you. Everytime I thought about having a conversation about it with you, I always envisioned you leaving me and telling me, I wasn’t what you wanted anymore. I knew I was being stupid, so I just buried it.”

“And you kept seeing Monroe after the kiss?”

“I saw her a few times yeah; mostly we’d go to café. The only time we went to Gardia’s was when we overheard Nia. Normally we’d just talk, she’s told me more than once that she’s truly over her feelings for me, and nothing’s happened since the kiss two years ago.”

“Why not just come clean when you overheard Nia?”

“Because I didn’t want to lose you Raven…you and Zachary are my life, I don’t know what I’d do without you”

“So instead you let my sister suffer?”

“No. I honestly thought it was true, I didn’t know it was a lie, if I did I would have come clean I swear to you”

“Why should I believe you now? After you lied to me for eight years?” Raven bluntly asked removing her hand from Octavia’s.

“Because I love you Raven, and no matter you think, that’s the truth. All these years I lied so that you could feel secure and safe in our relationship…I did it to protect you”

“DON’T YOU DARE DO THAT”

“Do what Raven? Tell you the truth?” As Octavia spoke; Lexa came rushing into the room her eyes darting to her twin instantly seeing the rage on face, watching her sisters movements.

“FINALLY…FINALLY YOU TELL THE TRUTH, IT WASN’T ENOUGH THAT YOU FUCKED SOMEONE BEHIND MY BACK….BUT NOW YOU WERE PROTECTING ME….YOU WERE ONLY PROTECTING ONE PERSON…”

“Raven…”

“NO OCTAVIA…YOU DON’T GET TO RAVEN ME…YOU DIDN’T PROTECT ME YOU LIED…YOU FUCKED UP…HOW CAN I FORGIVE YOU NOW HUH?... YOU RUINED EVERYTHING”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading everyone 
> 
> Please feel free to leave a comment 
> 
> Also Anyone interested in helping me write a Sex scene for this story please inbox me or let me know with a comment and I'll get in touch....Thanks everyone, Have an awesome Weekend :-)


	21. I Need Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clexa spend some more time together  
> Raven and Octavia continue to talk  
> And some Woods family Time (Including Raven)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanna say a quick THANK YOU to every single person that takes the time to read this chapter. And to everyone that has made a comment, left Kudos or bookmarked this story. Words can't even express how much I appreciate you all. And your support makes it so much more when writing the chapters, so much so I'm almost finished Chapter 22.. ONE spoiler (kind of) will be left at the bottom :-) But Anyways I hope you all enjoy this chapter and that you have a pleasant week 
> 
> ADDITIONAL NOTE: Just wanna take a moment to say that I hope everyone who reads this story that happens to live in London, I hope your all safe and unharmed after the recent attacks, and that you haven't lost someone because of it. My thoughts and prayers go out to those who have been affected and those that have lost their lives...Stay safe everyone and be mindful and safe when travelling...much love to each and every one of you.

** Chapter 21- I Need Time **

** Wednesday -10:52am **

Lexa instantly moved forward grabbing hold of her sister and pulling her towards the kitchen, she knew that look in Raven’s eyes and she knew where it led. The only way to stop her losing control was to step in and remove her sister from the situation completely. Once they were in the kitchen she looked at Raven, her body tense and stiff, her fist clenched and her jaw clenched tight. Keeping her hold on her sister Lexa moved to the back door pulling it open and pulling Raven out onto the back patio. Moving them until they were at the bench, pushing her sister down getting no reaction. Once Raven was sat down Lexa closed the door too slightly, moving back and sitting down next to her sister. Giving her a few minutes to calm down before she spoke:

 

“You know you can’t do that Rae?”

 

“I tried ok....but she was being so....calm and cool about lying to me...eight fucking years Lexa, she’s been seeing her behind my back for eight years....and on top of that Monroe has tried to kiss her on more than one occasion” Raven could feel the anger bubbling inside her as tears began to spill out of her eyes. “It’s like she doesn’t give a damn about anything but how she feels....she wants me to be happy that she’s telling the truth like she should have done in the first place”

 

“I know, and I know that you’re angry about her lying, but getting angry and aggressive with her isn’t something you can do Rae...and you know you’re gonna hate yourself later if you keep pushing this and you explode on her”

 

“I can’t help it, it’s like she doesn’t even care what this is doing to me...”

 

“I do care Rae...” Octavia’s voice seemed to break through every ounce of rage that Raven felt, it didn’t make her feel even angrier, in fact it made her feel calmer and more at ease. She couldn’t understand why but that was how her and Octavia had always worked, Octavia made her feel things that she hadn’t before ever since they had met. Snapping her head towards the direction of the voice, seeing Octavia nervously standing at the door, looking at her, a small flicker of hope still in her eyes. Clarke was stood behind them her eyes scanning from person to person. “Please Rae, let me explain fully....” Octavia moved forward quickly kneeling down in front of her wife, gently grabbing hold of her hands. “I know I’ve fucked up massively, and I know you think I don’t care about how I made you feel but I do...I love you Raven, I know everything I did was really crappy but you have to let me explain. None of it justifies me lying to you for years I know that but I want you to know everything, and why I hid it from you. Please just let me explain...just me and you”

 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea Octavia” Clarke intervened looking worriedly at her best friend, who looked back up at her and softly responded

 

“She would never hurt me Clarke, she couldn’t...she can get angry and hurt herself but she’d never hurt me...I know that” Looking back to Raven, who was now looking to her left tears running down her cheeks as she avoided looking at her wife.

 

“Octavia’s right...Raven wouldn’t hurt Octavia, not physically..not ever...she couldn’t”

 

“See...I told you, Lexa knows Raven better than anyone in this world. She knows Rae wouldn’t hurt me...so please just leave us to talk over things. I need to explain everything to her properly....please Lexa...”

 

“Ok....but as long as Rae wants to...” Lexa paused turning her attention to her sister she placed her hand on Raven’s shoulder, the action caused her sister to turn in her direction, softly she smiled and nodded her head at her, signalling that she was ok to be left alone with her wife. “Alright, I’ll be inside, you feel angry again then you call me...and if I hear any raised voices then I’ll be coming back out here...”

 

“I just want to talk Lex...no raised voice I promise”

 

“Alright Rae?” Raven nodded her head at her sister, leaning back on the bench and finally looking back at her wife, removing her left hand from Octavia’s grip she wiped the tears from her face. “Ok, we’ll leave you too it...” When Clarke went to protest but before she could get out a word, Lexa spoke again “It’s fine Clarke...come on, let’s go back inside and talk about what we were talking about...” Clarke looked at Lexa letting out a small smile before turning and walking back into the kitchen. Once they were both inside Lexa closed the door completely.

 

Once the door was closed, Octavia stood herself up moving to sit next to her wife, keeping her hands firmly holding onto Raven’s right hand. “I didn’t mean that to come out the way it did...I know I should have told you about everything as soon as it all started. I just let it snowball to the point that I couldn’t stop it, and the more we built our life together, the more in love with you I felt the more I couldn’t tell you because the more I had to lose....and if I’m honest...I liked it...”

 

“I’m sorry what? ....you enjoyed lying to me?”

 

“No not the lying part...I enjoyed the attention, I never had that growing up, you know that”

 

“That doesn’t make any of this ok, yeah you had a fucked up childhood O. But so did I and I don’t use that to lie and do whatever I want to you”

 

“I know that, but you know things about my childhood nobody knows not even Clarke”

 

“It still doesn’t make it ok”

 

“I know that I swear I do....but the more I lied the easier it became for me to let it snowball...and I know how much you hate liars, I know what your dad did to your mom and that you as a result, and I know you hate cheaters. I understand it and I love that about you, but the more I thought about it the more I thought that if you found out about everything I was lying about you’d think I was like your dad...and I’m not, I just wanted you to notice me more...”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“We just got engaged when you and Lexa set up Twin Records I understood what that meant, that sometimes you’d be out all night and I was ok with that. But then you’d invite me to the studio all night and we’d spend the night there making tracks and just being together. And then all of a sudden you stopped inviting me and you became more closed off than you normally were”

 

“That doesn’t mean I stopped wanting you there or loving you even...”

 

“I know that but it just felt like you didn’t want me to be involved in your business stuff, I thought that you wanted me to get my own life, so I did, I started applying for work with design companies. After I ran into Monroe, she recommended me to one and took me out for lunch to celebrate...I know that it doesn’t make sense and I can’t make it make sense, but I liked the attention. I just felt like it was my dad all over again, telling me he loved me and then disappearing from my life and not caring about anything I wanted or felt.”

 

“I’m not your dad”

 

“I know, and I get on with him now but I can’t change how insecure his actions made me feel. And the more successful you and Lexa got, the busier you got and the less I would see you. I know I promised you if I got upset or if I thought you were spending too much time away from home that I’d tell you....but I didn’t wanna ruin the fun you were having...I didn’t think I was worth that...” Octavia explained tears rushing from her eyes down her cheeks and onto her shirt. “Then Lexa and Clarke had the twins and there was more pressure on you to keep going with the company, and to run everything...then for a while you asked me to help, you have no idea how happy I was when you asked me to help you out, I was even happier that we got to spend the whole day together. Then there was the physical connection as well, we went from having sex every night to having it once every three or four weeks because you were tired and I understood that, but when I started helping out we’d be together all day and you changed, I remember you lifting me and carrying me into your office....we spent hours making love and I felt connected again...you promised me that you’d try and be home more...and then Lexa came back and we were back to the normal routine.”

 

“Why didn’t you say anything then?”

 

“Because you were happy...you’d come home and tell me how much fun you and Lexa had making a track together. You would always say you missed me, so I thought maybe you were happy with it either, but then it kept going on and after a few months I just wanted someone to want me”

 

“I did want you”

 

“I know you did but you didn’t show it...I thought maybe it was me, that I was being a drama queen like my dad always says I am...        I wanted to tell someone but Clarke was dealing with her post partum and you were supporting Lexa, I didn’t wanna be a drama queen or be told I was over reacting, so when Monroe would invite me to lunch I’d go and she’d compliment me and tell me how beautiful I looked and it made me feel like me again...it’s help me get through another month of us not touching each other, or a week of me not seeing you.”

 

“Why her though? ....of all people you could have gone to O, you go to the one person that would hurt me the most...”

 

“Promise you won’t get angry”

 

“I can’t promise that because you making me promise in itself means I’m more than likely to get angry”

 

“Ok, then promise you’ll try please”

 

“Ok, I’ll try not to get angry...I promise”

 

“Thank you....” Octavia took a deep breath knowing that Raven was more than likely going to explode at her. Stealing herself for what was about to happen she honestly spoke “I knew if you found out I was seeing Monroe behind your back, it would hurt you...and maybe make you feel what I was feeling”

 

“Hang on, are you saying that you wanted me to notice you were seeing Monroe?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“Why? ...you wanted me to be upset and heartbroken? Why would you do that?”

 

“I wanted you to notice something was wrong. And I wanted to know you still loved me, that I was still the one that made your heart flutter and your stomach do somersaults. I didn’t think that you still loved me anymore, I wanted to see if you did but you never questioned anything I did......ever”

 

“Because I trusted you, because I loved you and I didn’t think that you would ever lie to me again”

 

“I know that ok, I just couldn’t help but think that you didn’t love me. So I ignored all the small thoughts in my head telling me it was a terrible idea seeing Monroe, because I wanted the attention. I just wanted you to show me that you still had that love for me that you did when we got married.”

 

“I just don’t get why you didn’t come to me O. You know I wouldn’t have been angry if you’d told me what you were feeling. I would have come home earlier.”

 

“I know Rae, but Lexa was going through a hard time trying to support Clarke and basically doing everything for the twins, and I’m not using that as an excuse because I know that Clarke couldn’t help what she was going through. So I thought a few more months wouldn’t hurt, Lexa needed you and I could survive for a few more months....and then one night you came home and told me that Clarke had a really bad episode and you just held onto me like I was the only thing in the world that was keeping you going...”

 

“Because you were O, I knew how much everything was affecting Lexa and no matter how much I tried I couldn’t ease it for her. I’ve always been able to help her in some way but there was no way for me to help her...or Clarke. If I didn’t have you I would have gone crazy, you kept me sane in more ways than one.”

 

“I know, and I am really sorry....but that night I realised that you really did love me still, and that you still needed to me...I remember that was the first night we talked about having children, like really talked about it, we went over ever single detail of having a child, what would happen if one of use got post partum, how we’d deal with it and how we’d cope financially....Then you looked at me and told me there wasn’t anyone in the world that you wanted to have your child but me”

 

“And that’s it all of a sudden you stopped wanting me to find out the truth”

 

“No, I realised that you did still love me, and that the only thing that had gone between us was the communication, we didn’t talk as much even when you got home we’d just sit next to each other. Then when that night happened, I changed my side, I started ignoring Monroe and putting all my attention into you and me, and getting back to the life we always wanted, making it possible for us to have a child. It was like every single thing changed because of that night, we texted almost all day and you’d call me for hours whilst you were at work...and then there was the love making, it was out of this world, like everything amped up, everytime you touched me it felt like an explosion just like the first time we ever slept together but way more intense. I didn’t need anything else but you...”

 

“So you stopped talking to Monroe again?”

 

“Yeah...to be honest, I pretty much used her...anytime I would need someone to talk to, there she would be. It’s bad look back on it but I knew she would be there whenever and whatever time I needed her to be. And she’d tell me everything that I needed to hear.”

 

“So you used her?”

 

“Yeah I think I did...I don’t think that it was about her. It was about the attention, I like being told I’m beautiful and that I deserve to be treated like a princess....and I know you used to, but when you get stressed and anguish about things you stop doing those things...and I miss the attention”

 

“Arghhhh...” Raven suddenly let out removing her hand from Octavia’s and leaning forward slightly “So your saying is that all this is my fault for not paying enough attention to you?”

 

“No babe I’m not saying that....” Octavia went to take hold of Raven’s hand again only for her wife to turn and look at her pulling her hand away from Octavia as she looked at her wife expectantly

 

“Then what are you saying?”

 

“I’m saying I like attention...especially from you, so when I didn’t get that I did the only thing I could think of and I used someone to make me feel better. ..I like feeling wanted and beautiful but when I don’t feel like that I just need it...I know it makes me a terrible person, and I can handle that but I can’t handle you hating me, that’s why I didn’t want to tell you”

 

“I don’t think I could ever hate you Octavia...but I can dislike your decisions especially your decision to lie to me”

 

“I know Rae, and I swear I never meant to hurt you. And what I said in there wasn’t me saying I should get credit for owning up to you, it was me trying to tell you why I kept the lies going even though there was nothing sexual going on between me and Monroe”

 

“Because you wer protecting me?”

 

“Yes....and I was protecting myself. I know how it feels to miss you when your gone for a night, and I knew that if you left me I couldn’t handle it, not being without you forever, I can’t do that Rae, I love you too much to let you go. And knowing it was my own fault, losing you isn’t something I could handle and it still isn’t...”

 

“Then why tell me? ....because Lexa told you too? Because Clarke knew the truth and wanted you to come clean as well? Why?”

 

“Because I’d look into your eyes and all I could think o was that I was lying to you, you were doing everything to make me feel great and loved, and like I was needed and wanted. You were doing so much for me. Then you told me you knew I wanted to go back to work and that you would do anything to make sure that I could, and that was the final straw, I knew I had to tell you, I still didn’t want to but you deserved the truth and even more for me to tell you the truth”

 

“Why now though, I get everything you just said but really why at that exact moment”

 

“Because you were being you, you were being the Raven that I feel for, making me dinner, telling me how beautiful you thought I was and how no matter I would always be the only woman for you, everything you said had so much meaning and was so pure that I couldn’t go on with it, you deserved so much more than that. So much more than me, you deserved the truth, and I deserved whatever happens afterwards”

 

“Why not wait until the next day?”

 

“Because if I waited I wouldn’t have been able to go through with it...”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Because I wouldn’t have been able to find the words, even knowing that you deserved the truth....My want to tell you was over powered by my want for you to stay with me and my love for you”

 

“So you were actually protecting me in your own way?”

 

“Yeah, I couldn’t handle the thought of losing you. But I knew I didn’t deserve you anymore but I wanted to tell you the truth...and I know it might not be easy and simple but I want to earn your love back again, and I know that I can earn it back I just need you to give me a chance”

 

“You haven’t lost my love O...” Raven honestly responded leaning back again her eyes connecting with Octavia’s, the look they shared made her stomach flutter softly as she looked at her, a half smile creeping onto her face for a second before she forced it to disappear. Keeping her face as serious as she could she softly continued “But you have lost my trust...if I can’t look you in the eye and believe every word you say, I can’t right now because all I’m thinking is, is this another lie to protect yourself...”

 

“It’s not Rae I swear...” Octavia’s voice softly croaked, her voice cracking and breaking slightly as fresh tears rushed down her cheeks. Her eyes staying locked on Raven’s trying to tell what Raven was doing to do or say. “I’ll do whatever you want me to Raven, I’ll get on my knees and beg for forgiveness if you want... I just need you to tell me what to do...” Moving she went to move onto her knees only for Raven to grab her hands, stopping her from getting onto her knees

 

“Don’t do that O...I don’t want you to beg or get on your knees...I want you to stop lying to me, everything you felt and everything bad that’s happened to us over the last few years could have been avoided if you just told the truth...and Lexa and Clarke wouldn’t have lost a whole year...even more the twins wouldn’t have gone through all that emotion stress and fear, I’ve been there, even you’ve been there O, how could you keep lying knowing what they were feeling and going through”

 

“I swear on my life that I didn’t know Nia was lying, I didn’t know Lexa had a tattoo. I don’t know anything about her body, there was no way I could have known that Nia was just lying. I didn’t even chose the restaurant...and I swear to you Raven on everything we are that I didn’t know it was a lie...I love Lexa , Clarke and the twins and I would never put them through that knowing it was a lie....I wouldn’t and couldn’t do that, not to Lexa and Clarke but to the twins, they didn’t deserve anything that happened...”

 

“I know you wouldn’t ruin their family on purpose...”

 

“So you believe me?”

 

“Yes....but that doesn’t mean that we can go back to the way we were, because we can’t...I don’t even think I can come home....”

 

“But...”

 

“No buts’ Octavia...I need time to process everything, and I need time to work out what I want...I can’t tell you that everything is gonna be ok, because I’m not sure if it will be, I can’t tell you its ok now that you’ve told me and that we’re gonna be back to normal. Because I don’t know if I can, I’ve only just found out all of this, you have to give me time to process it...”

 

“Can I just ask one thing?”

 

“Of course”

 

“Are you thinking about divorcing me?”

 

“No I’m not....but I’m not sure I can forget everything. I just ned time to process, ok? ...I’m not leaving you and I’m not divorcing you I just need time to work out what to do. I know that you love me and I love you, but I also know that if I come home everything will get buried and we won’t work anything out. I need to work out what I wanna do, but I think that some time apart will be good....maybe it’ll help you work out if you still want me as well..” Raven stood up going to walk away before she could take even a step, Octavia gently gripped onto Raven’s wrist stopping her in her tracks, standing herself up she closed the gap between them

 

“I don’t need to think about that...I know I want you, and I know you’re the one that I love and want to spend the rest of my life with...I know I want that, I fucked up I admit that but losing you isn’t something I want ever...”

 

“You’re not losing me Octavia...” Raven began removing her wrist from Octavia’s grip, placing her hands on either side of Octavia’s face, gently looking into her eyes. “I’m not divorcing you and I’m not leaving forever I just need time...a break if you wanna call that...I need to be alone to think things through and to work on getting rid of my anger....and I think you need time alone to think about why you feel the way you do...and I know that you love me, I know that ok? And I love you too but right now the best thing for both of us is to be apart...I’m gonna pack a bag and stay with Lexa for a while”

 

“I’m sorry...” Octavia let out as the tears exploded out of her eyes and her body began shaking with upset, Raven couldn’t just watch Octavia cry, so instead she stepped forward wrapping her arms around Octavia pulling her into an embrace as Octavia gripped onto her tightly. As Octavia continued to cry and let out all her emotions telling Raven over and over she was sorry. Raven just held onto her telling her it was going to be ok, and even though she was saying the words she wasn’t quite sure that they were true, she wanted them to be but only time would tell.

* * *

 

** In the Kitchen – 11:20am **

Clarke and Lexa sat at the table neither of them had said a word to the other since they came back into the kitchen. Instead they just sat down at the table, only moving when the other did, Lexa had gotten up and made herself a coffee signalling to Clarke, silently asking if she wanted one, Clarke had silently responded with a nod. Lexa had returned to the table with the two coffee’s, the two still remaining silent as they both listened out for Octavia and Raven, neither knowing if Raven would be able to control her temper whilst talking to Octavia. But the more they stayed silently sitting at the table drinking their coffee’s, the more Clarke would think about Lexa’s response to her asking her to move back home, or more Lexa’s lack of response her wife hadn’t said a word back to her, not a yes or a no. Then her and Lexa had heard Raven shouting and Lexa had ran into the living room to stop herself exploding at her wife. Taking a small sip of her coffee she was about to speak when she looked up at Lexa seeing an intrigued look on Lexa’s face, her right eyebrow slightly raised up, slowly Lexa contorted her face and asked:

 

“What’s on your mind?”

 

“You didn’t answer my question?”

 

“I didn’t get a chance to...I had to stop my sister going loco on her wife”

 

“So what is your answer?”

 

“What I was about to say before I heard Raven shouting is....I want to move back in...”

 

“But you can’t because you still don’t forgive me” Clarke finished internally kicking herself.

 

“No...” Lexa responded, removing her hands from her cup she stood up walking around the table kneeling down in front of her wife, gently looking up at Clarke, she placed her hands on Clarke’s thighs moving her until Clarke was facing her, looking down at her with sad eyes. “I do forgive you, I swear it...but it’s not about me at the moment or what I want...”

 

“Then why can’t you move back in?”

 

“Because Raven needs me...I know we’re adults but I have to be there for her, we’ve always been there for each other and as much as she puts on a brave face she isn’t holding it together inside. She needs someone to be there for her when she needs to break down, I found her in a mess the other night Clarke, I had to hold her all night and she only calmed down because I was there. I know you don’t get it but me and her have this connection I can’t even explain. She needs me right now and I can’t abandon her right now.” Taking a deep breath in she looked up at Clarke smiling naturally at the blonde beauty in front of her “You have no idea how much I wanna move back in, how much I wanna wake up next to you every morning, and wake up to the twins making more noise than anyone should at 5am, I want to go to sleep holding you but as much as I want that, I have to and want to help my sister more...”

 

“Stop talking....” Seeing the look of worry on her wife’s face she continued “If you don’t stop talking I am going to jump on you and our deal to wait is gonna fly out the window...”

 

“Oh really?”

 

“Yes...you’re so amazing...” Clarke honestly responded her hands moving to Lexa’s shoulders pulling her forward leaning forward she gently placed a kiss on Lexa’s cheek “You’re so selfless and loving...it always blows my mind...”

 

“That’s a good thing right...”

 

“Oh yeah...massively...” Clarke smirked leaning forward and capturing Lexa’s lips with her own. Instantly Lexa returned the kiss leaning into it a little more, her hands still naturally resting on Clarke’s thighs. As they kissed Clarke couldn’t help but let her mind wonder, pulling back she looked Lexa in the eyes and softly asked, “But once Raven’s all good, would you wanna move back in?”

 

“Hell yeah...I can’t wait to be back home”

 

“And we can still do weekend sleepovers and date night’s right?”

 

“Yep...in fact I spoke to your Mom and Dad this morning and they want the twins next weekend, so I was thinking maybe we could have a date night here. I’m gonna talk to O and see if Raven can have Zachary for the weekend. Then I can spend the whole weekend sweeping you off your feet, and giving you the rest our daughter says you deserve...” Lexa paused for a second seeing a look she couldn’t quite judge on Clarke’s face “If you’re ok with all of that of course”

 

“Are you kidding...of course I am, it sounds perfect...but when you say you spoke to my parents what do you mean?”

 

“Well...I may have called them and asked them if that was ok, in my defence they asked about having the twins...I saw an opening and I jumped on it like any self respecting wife would”

 

“Interesting....”

 

“It is isn’t it?”

 

“Why would you call my parents anyway?”

 

“I’ll have you know, me and Mr and Mrs Griffin have an amazing relationship and sometimes I just like hearing your dad’s voice....it soothes me...” Lexa’s comment made Clarke giggle softly before she seriously said

 

“Lexa....”

 

“Ok...so Olivia’s words really made me think to myself and I thought you deserved sometime on your own, you only have to spend one day with me and then the rest you’ll get to yourself...”

 

“What if you I don’t wanna spend one day with you?”

 

“Oh ok...I’m ok with that, you can just have a weekend on your own...that’s fine by me...”

 

“Lexa....I’m not saying that...I’m saying what if I wanna spend the whole weekend with you...is that something we could arrange?”

 

“Um...” Lexa let out studying Clarke’s face trying to judge whether or not Clarke was joking or messing around with her. Subconsciously wetting her lips she found her words, softly asking “Are you being serious?”

 

“Yes...I wanna spend the whole weekend with you...just me and you, I promise no funny busy, just cuddles and kisses, I swear...”

 

“Cuddles and kisses?”

 

“Yeah...would that be ok?”

 

“That would be more than fine...as long as you’re sure it’s what you want”

 

“It is....since we officially got back together we haven’t spent any real time alone, and I wanna spend some time with you, just me and you...” Clarke honestly responded leaning forward softly kissing Lexa. Their lips connecting for a second before Clarke pulled back smiling down at Lexa “Now that’s all settled...I can’t wait for next weekend” Clarke smiled laughing softly as she leant forward again, reconnecting her and Lexa’s lips. Their lips stayed connected for a few minutes, both enjoying the time they had together in this moment. Finally, Clarke pulled back, feeling the heat rising inside herself, softly biting the corner of the bottom of her lip she softly asked “Maybe you and Raven can come over tomorrow or Friday and we can hang out with the twins?..if you want to of course”

 

“Yeah, that’d be great...we have meetings today and tomorrow, so maybe Friday afternoon; we can pick the twins up and bring the back here, if you want?”

 

“Great...that’s a plan then; I’ll cook for you both...”

 

“You don’t have to do that”

 

“I know but I want to, so I will.....oh and no telling the twins, it can be a surprise for them when you pick them up”

 

“As long as you’re sure”

 

“I am” Clarke responded leaning forward pecking Lexa on the lips before pulling back “Now get off the floor”

 

“Yes Boss lady” Lexa smirked standing up and walking back to her chair, sitting down she continued drinking her coffee, her eyes staying locked on Clarke as the blonde moved herself back around so she was looking at Lexa again. Without another thought Lexa reached her left hand forward gently taking a hold of Clarke’s hand in her own, her other hand wrapping around the handle of the cup as she began drinking from it again. The two continued to drink their coffee’s in silence. Only a few minutes passing before Lexa spoke again “I never asked, how’s Olivia been sleeping the last few days?”

 

“Good actually, she woke up last night but not because of a nightmare, she said she just wanted to a cuddle, I cuddled her for a few minutes and put her back to bed. And she went straight back to sleep without waking up until about 6am. She came into my room with this massive smile on her face. One very similar to yours”

 

“What can I say, I have good genes”

 

“And I don’t?”

 

“Mmmm your genes are great and all, they’re just not as strong as mine...”

 

“If you say so”

 

“I do...therefore it is true...but we both know she gets her brains from you, and that pout ...if you pouted of course”

 

“Of course...” Clarke smirked squeezing Lexa’s hand softly “She gets her energy from me as well”

 

“Definitely, I’m never that energetic in the mornings....plus her caring side...She gets that from you as well” Lexa didn’t miss the genuine smile of happiness that graced her wife’s face at her admission “Now Oscar...he is a Mini Me in too many ways...my brains and my caring side..Plus my quite little quirks all wrapped into one”

 

“Except that cute little snore and that pout though, right?”

 

“See now we’re on the same page”

 

“Yes we are” Clarke smirked as she looked behind Lexa her eyes landing on the door of the kitchen “I wonder how their talk is going?”

 

“I don’t know, it’s a good sign that there are no raised voices. Maybe it’s going better than the first time...” Within a few seconds they both heard movement on the patio, looking back at the door Lexa turned back to Clarke softly saying “Well looks like we’re about to find out”

 

Within a few seconds, Raven was pulling the door open, holding it for Octavia to walk through. Octavia walked into the kitchen, the tears she’d shed outside still mingling and staining her cheeks. Neither Clarke nor Lexa said anything just letting the two women enter them room and talk at their own pace. Raven stepped into the kitchen closing the door carefully behind her. Looking at her sister seeing the silent intrigue on her face she softly smiled taking a seat at the table, sitting on Lexa’s right hand side, as Octavia sat down on Lexa’s left, wiping her cheek and face with her hands as she took a small breath in. Nobody said a word they just sat there for a few minutes until Raven finally spoke:

 

“Me and O have talked and we both agree that some time apart is what we need right now”

 

“Ok...and your both agreed on it right?” Clarke asked noticing Octavia’s silence, and also knowing that her best friend would do anything to keep her wife.

 

“Yes, Raven needs time to process everything....and I need time to think over everything that’s happened and why I lied...even more why I wasn’t just honest about how I was feeling. I don’t want Raven to move out but I can’t make her stay...and it’s not fair to put myself first, and if we wanna work things out then this has to be about us both.”

 

“Are you one hundred percent sure about this? Thinking and doing it are too different things”

 

“I know Clarke, and I don’t mean this in a rude way...but this is completely different to you and Lexa. Raven needs space and I think I need it as well...time to process what I’ve done...and all the pain I’ve caused by lying, including you and Lexa.”

 

“Ok then.”

 

Before Clarke could continue to speak Raven’s voice caught Clarke’s attention, instantly Clarke turned her attention to her sister in law. “I know this seems rash and sudden but it isn’t, since Octavia told me my heads been spinning. And now it’s finally slowing down, me and Lex have talked about it and as much as she doesn’t agree with me moving out she knows that I need this. I know you might not get it Clarke but I just need space...I’m not giving up my son, I’m not giving up my wife, or the life we have together I just need to be on my own for a while. To figure everything out, I’m not giving up on anything.”

 

“I get it...you’ve got a thousand thoughts going through your head, it’s hard to work out what’s real and what’s just your imagination. I get it Rae, and if you need to talk to someone who who’s gone through those emotions, then I’m here for you....I know it’s different but for a long time I thought Lexa cheated on me and emotionally it drained and nearly killed me..Thinking about...Well you know what I was thinking about...What I’m trying to say is if you need me then I’m here for you”

 

“Thanks Clarke...” Raven genuinely responded smiling at Clarke before turning to her sister slowly and asked “I know it’s not ideal, but could I crash with you for a while”

 

“You know you don’t need to ask, you’re always welcome for as long as you need...you know that”

 

“Thanks”

 

“Anytime....Anyway we better get going we’ve got a meeting with Warner Music Group in an hour...and we need to prep...” Lexa suddenly explained, she knew that meeting wasn’t until 4pm that evening, which was more than enough time to prepare. But she also knew that her sister wanted to leave, to not be around Octavia at the moment. She could see the anger that was still bubbling beneath the surface in her sister’s eyes.

 

“Yeah we do” Raven let out, thankful for her sister’s sudden intervention. Right now she just wanted to get out of there and get away from Octavia. Slowly standing herself up she walked around the table and through the kitchen into the living room, grabbing her jacket from its place on the couch., where she had left it when her and Lexa got back. Lexa watched on for a second before she stood up herself, as she did Clarke stood as well, both of them stepping forward and hugging each other at the same time. As Lexa pulled back she leant down kissing Clarke quickly before softly saying:

 

“I’ll talk to you tonight...if you need anything just call” Turning her attention to Octavia looking at her sister in law, not knowing what to do, seeing the upset in Octavia’s facial expression and her body language she walked forward gently wrapping her arms around Octavia, hugging her softly as she whispered “Just give her time...and everything will fall into place, today is a good start..don’t go backwards ok?” Pulling back she saw Octavia nodding her head softly at her words “Good, I’ll call you in a couple days to chat, I need to run something passed you as well”

 

“She can have Zachary as much as she wants, just let me know when”

 

“It’s not just about that, I’m gonna call you to check in on you....because your still family...you’re not alone so don’t go thinking like that, ok?”

 

“Ok.....Thanks Lex”

 

“No problem....I’ll see you both soon...” Walking towards the front door, she turned as she walked looking at Clarke, a smile on her face as she softly said “Oh and I love you” Without another word she turned facing her sister and the front door, smiling as she heard Clarke say ‘I love you too’, as she got closer Raven opened the door and they both walked through the door closing it behind them. As they walked to the car, Lexa wrapped her arm around Raven’s shoulder pulling her close and telling her it would all be ok. She knew it would take time but she also knew her sister and how she felt about Octavia and her family, but she also knew that now Raven had what she hoped were the full facts, and that in itself was something Raven needed. And maybe with it Raven would be able to finally close the door on the uncertain and unknowing feeling she’d had the last few days.

* * *

 

** Friday Night-Two Days Later **

** Woods House-15:30 **

Clarke was in the kitchen having just finished preparing Meatballs for her, the twins, Lexa and Raven for dinner. She wanted to prepare the food early in case anything went wrong, but also so that she had more time to spend with Lexa and the twins, and Raven as well. She’d been preparing the food for the last 40 minutes and was more than thankful to finally be washing her hands, getting rid of the weird feeling that was left behind by the meat. Washing her hands thoroughly she dried them, hearing the door unlocking and opening she placed the towel on the side walking into the living room, just in time to see Oscar and Olivia, both of them wearing their leather jackets, come running into the living room, both of the bursting with excitement. Oscar took off running to the couch jumping up and it bouncing softly on the spot in excitement, whilst Olivia ran straight to her Mommy stopping in front of her, her face a picture of happiness and excitement mixed together.

 

“Look Mommy....” Olivia all but shouted pointing behind her “Auntie Rae and Mama, surprised us”

 

“They did?” Clarke asked pretending she didn’t know what was going on; she looked up for a second smiling at Lexa as her wife walked into the house closely followed by Raven

 

“Yeah...We waited with the teacher like always Mommy....then she told us to go outside and when we did Mama was there....and Auntie Rae was laughing and....” Olivia stopped herself turning around looking at her Auntie Rae; her Auntie Rae stopped removing her boots as she softly asked “What’s the word Auntie Rae?”

 

“Recording”

 

“Recording...” When her Auntie Rae nodded her approval, Olivia turned back to her Mommy, continuing her sentence “Auntie Rae was recording us....she said our faces were funny...” Olivia finished laughing softly as her hands clasped together over her chest as she looked up at her Mommy

 

“I bet they were...was it a good surprise though?”

 

“Yeah” Olivia let out nodding her head once “Mama talked to all our teachers, and they said that we look like Mama, that we had the same hair...”

 

“You do...the same hair and the same coloured eyes...but you have some of Mommy’s hair too so that’s ok”

 

“Mama said that we are like you more Mommy”

 

“She did?”

 

“Yeah...Mama said that we have your smile and that we’re kind and...And um...loving like you Mommy and that Oscar snores like Mommy too, but she said it’s nice... and she loves it”

 

“What do you think? Are you and me alike?” Olivia looked up at her sweetly nodding her head “And what do you think makes us alike?”

 

“We both like Princesses, and Oscar does snore Mommy but only a small bit...I like it. And we both like cereal and toast, and all breakfasts. And we both love Mama and Mama Cuddles...”

 

“That is a lot isn’t it?”

 

“It’s loads Mommy, but there’s loads more...but Mama says the most imp...” Looking back she looked at her Mama, getting an encouraging nod from her Mama she turned back saying the word as she thought it should be said “Important....thing is that we’re smart just like you Mommy”

 

“Mama said all that?” Olivia nodded her head softly “I’ll have to thank Mama for saying all those nice things won’t I?” Olivia nodded her head again “Ok then, I’ll make sure that I thank Mama...but now missy...it’s time to take your shoes and jacket off please...”

 

“Ok Mommy....can I have a kiss first please Mommy?” Olivia sweetly asked looking up at her Mommy with eyes of hope. Laughing softly Clarke reached down lifting her daughter off the ground, instantly Olivia’s arms moved to her Mommy’s shoulders, leaning forward Clarke pecked her daughter on the lips softly “Thank you Mommy” Olivia sweetly responded wrapping her arms around her Mommy hugging her tightly

 

“You’re welcome princess” She softly said reaching down grabbing her daughter’s shoes “Now let’s get these shoes off” She let out as she pulled Olivia’s leg upwards playfully until the shoe fell off making Olivia burst into a fit of laughter, switching Olivia slightly to the other side, Clarke repeated the action it again made Olivia burst into a fit of laughter. Her giggle making Raven and Lexa smirk as they watched on, as they moved and sat down on the couch at the same time.

 

There action made Oscar laugh, running across the couch he jumped onto his Mama’s lap, sitting himself up straight and looking at her. “You both sat down at the same time Mama” He pointed out laughing softly as he looked at his Auntie Rae and his Mama

 

“We did?” Lexa asked getting a small nod and laugh from her son she continued “We do that sometimes, we can’t help it...can we Rae?”

 

“Nope we can’t...just like you and Olivia can’t help it when you do things at the same time”

 

“We just do it Auntie Rae, we don’t know why”

 

“Well neither do me or Mama, sometimes we just do things at the same time.”

 

“It’s cool Mama....I like it” Oscar innocently let out leaning forward against his Mama more “Everyone says its cool.....and I think so too”

 

“You do?” Lexa softly asked her son

 

“Yeah...it’s better when you and Auntie Rae do it though”

 

“Well thank you handsome”

 

“You’re welcome Mama”

 

As Clarke walked over to the coat rack, Lexa reached up removing her son’s jacket, looking down at his feet she looked at him firmly saying “I think you better remove your shoes before Mommy sees your climbing on the couch with them on” Oscar let out a gasp obviously having forgotten that he was wearing his shoes still. Quickly he jumped off the couch removing his shoes, picking them up and rushing over to place his shoes where they should be. Standing next to his Mommy he looked up at her sweetly saying:

 

“I’m sorry Mommy; I forgot to take my shoes off”

 

Clarke smiled at the sweet apology, gently running her hand through his messy hair and softly saying “It’s ok baby, I know you were a little excited and forgot...but next time try and remember ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy....I’m really sorry”

 

“It’s ok baby boy...I forgive you”

 

“Thank you Mommy...” He let out rushing back over to his Mama, jumping onto her lap smiling up at her “How long are you staying Mama?”

 

“Well me and Auntie Rae are staying for dinner, then we’re gonna put you and Olivia to bed. And then we’ll go home”

 

“Why can’t you stay Mama?”

 

“Because we have to go home baby that’s why”

 

“But I want you to stay Mama....I like having breakfast with you, and I miss you loads Mama” Oscar let out, tears beginning to spill out of his eyes as he looked at his Mama, the tears spilling from his eyes as his face filled with sadness “I don’t want you to go Mama” He managed to say as his voice filled with emotion and he began to cry fully.

 

Lexa, Raven and Clarke were all shocked at Oscar’s sudden burst of emotions; he’d gone from happy to sad within a few seconds. Not wanting to crowd him and sensing something was wrong, Lexa stood up holding onto her son, she walked through the living room into the kitchen and out the back door, moving to the bench on the patio out back. Sitting down on the bench she held Oscar close to her chest, placing a gentle kiss on her son’s head she softly asked:

 

“What’s wrong my little prince?” When Oscar didn’t respond, she gently rubbed his back giving him a few more minutes to calm down before she softly added “Mama knows something is wrong” She heard Oscar sniffled softly before he pushed himself back off her chest slightly looking at his Mama, sadness still on his face as he softly spoke:

 

“I don’t want you to be gone forever”

 

“I’m not gonna be gone forever I promise”

 

“But Mickey said you will”

 

“Who is Mickey?”

 

“He’s in my class in Nursery Mama”

 

“Ok....and what exactly did Mickey say to you?”

 

“He said his Mommy and Daddy left each other and his Daddy never came home Mama....I want you to come home Mama....please, I’ll be a good boy I promise”

 

“Hey listen to me handsome...Mama is coming home soon, but not right now...I know you miss me and that you want me home, and I wanna come home but sometimes we have to wait for a while, before we can do with something we want to...” Lexa tried her best to explain it in a way that Oscar would understand, reaching up she gently wiped his cheeks removing all the tears that covered them.

 

“But what if you never come home Mama?”

 

“That will never happen...How often do you speak to me?”

 

“Every night Mama”

 

“See if I didn’t wanna come home I wouldn’t talk to you every night would I?”

 

“You might Mama”

 

“I might...How about Mommy....do I love Mommy?”

 

“Yes”

 

“And when you love someone do you live with them?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“See, so I love Mommy and I love you and Olivia...so why wouldn’t I want to come home really soon”

 

“I don’t know Mama”

 

“I’ll tell you a secret....Me and Mommy have been talking and we agreed that I’m gonna come home really really soon, I just have to live in my apartment for a little longer because my work is really hard at the moment and I have to finish it before I can completely home again”

 

“But you will come home Mama?”

 

“I will.....really soon I promise, I just need a few more weeks...can you give Mama a few more weeks?”

 

Oscar’s face contorted slightly as he thought looking up at his Mama he softly smiled and nodded “Yes Mama....but you promise your coming back Mama”

 

“I promise you...with all my heart”

 

“Do you Mama promise?”

 

“I do...I Mama Promise you I’m coming back home soon”

 

“Ok Mama....I’m sorry Mama”

 

Lexa looked down at her son, she smiled at the little boy sitting on her lap, apologising for getting upset and possibly upsetting his Mama. Wrapping her arms around her son, she placed a gentle kiss on the top of his head as he wrapped his arms around her. “You don’t have to apologise handsome...ok?” Oscar nodded his head into his Mama’s chest holding onto her tightly “Good, no more getting upset...and if you do feel sad or really upset then you promise to tell Mama or Mommy?”

 

“I promise Mama...I just got upset really quickly”

 

“I know you did handsome” Lexa felt Oscar giggle softly into her chest, lifting his head up she noticed the smile now on his face, looking up at her he pursed his lips, smiling Lexa leant down kissing her son quickly before she smiled at him softly asking “You wanna stay out here for a little longer?” Oscar nodded his head leaning forward without a word leaning against his Mama closing his eyes and hugging his Mama tightly.

 

Lexa stayed sitting on the bench with Oscar for ten minutes letting her son calm down even more now knowing his mind had ran off with him after his friends words. She made a mental note to tell Clarke what the mini breakdown was, looking down at Oscar, seeing he was still calm she stood up keeping her son on her chest due to his lack of footwear. Looking at him she softly asked “All better now?” When Oscar nodded his head she walked straight into the kitchen, walking back into the living room seeing Raven, Olivia and Clarke were sitting on the couch talking about what she could hear were princesses. Placing Oscar down on the floor, she watched Olivia instantly stop talking; climbing down from the couch Olivia walked over to her brother, looking at him with a soft smile she hugged him tightly:

 

“Are you ok Ozzie?” She sweetly asked him, the moment so pure and love filled it pulled at the hearts of each of the adults in the room. The twins hugged for a minute before they pulled back, Oscar looked at his twin sister nodding his head softly at her. Smiling Olivia watched as Oscar ran past her and over to their Mommy, wrapping his arms around her as he buried his head in her chest gently. Turning her attention back to her Mama Olivia ran forward holding her arms up, Lexa stepped forward lifting Olivia off the ground as she did so. Carrying her daughter with her to the couch sitting herself down on the couch , as they landed on the couch Olivia looked up at her Mama softly asking; “Mama...”

 

“Yes Princess?”

 

“Mommy is making meatballs and sgetti”

 

“Spaghetti?”

 

“Yeah” Olivia responded laughing softly at her Mama’s correction. “Mommy is making Spa...ghetti and meatballs”

 

“That is my favourite Mommy food ever”

 

“Mommy said that too Mama”

 

“She did?” Olivia nodded her head “Well Mommy knows that because Mommy knows me too well”

 

“Yeah...Mama....can you tell me a story before bed please”

 

“Of course I can princess”

 

“Thank You Mama”

 

“You’re welcome....now what should we do before Mommy cooks dinner?”

 

“Can we watch a Princess movie please Mama? I want to watch Sleeping Beauty with Auntie Rae”

 

“You do?”

 

“Yeah...Auntie Rae says she hasn’t seen it....and it’s the bestest film Mama”

 

“Why don’t you ask Auntie Rae, if she wants to watch it then we will” Olivia did as her Mama suggested moving from her Mama’s lap she crawled over to her Auntie Rae. Taking the quick chance Lexa looked over at Oscar and Clarke, thankfully she noticed the smile on her son’s face as he laughed at something his Mommy said or did. Seeing his Mama looking at him he rushed over to her jumping onto her and hugging tightly “So you’re feeling better yeah?”

 

“Much better Mama....we had cuddles and that made me feel better...and Mommy promised me that your coming home...if both Mommies promise then it will come true”

 

“Is that right?”

 

“Yeah, it always works Mama”

 

“I’ll have to try it one day”

 

“Do Mama, it always works the best”

 

“Ok then....did Mommy tell you what she’s cooking for dinner?” Oscar shook his head at his Mama “She’s cooking Meatballs and spaghetti”

 

Oscar let out a small gasp before cheering “YEAH...I love spaghetti Mama”

 

“I know...you always make a mess as well don’t you?”

 

“I’m Prince Messy Mama” Oscar responded letting out a massive giggle that made Lexa smile and naturally laugh at her son’s response. Before they had a chance to continue talking Olivia let out a small “YAAAYYYY” Causing Lexa to turn her attention to her daughter softly she asked “Did Auntie Rae say yes?” When Olivia nodded her head Lexa laughed looking down at her son adding “We’re gonna watch Sleeping Beauty...wanna watch with us?” Oscar nodded his head “Ok...why don’t you go put it on...think you can do that?” Oscar nodded his head excitedly jumping down onto the floor and running over to the TV, as soon as her Mama’s lap was free she rushed over sitting on her Mama’s lap hugging her tightly whilst keeping an eye on her brother as he went about turning on the TV and the Blu Ray player under the watchful eye of their Mommy.

 

Lexa smiled turning to look at her sister, seeing what she could have swore was a look of excitement on her face. “Are you excited to watch Sleeping Beauty Sis?”

 

“Ah...Duh...I’ve never seen it, well that I remember, and I’ve been told it’s the best film ever so it’s got a lot to live up to”

 

“You won’t be disappointed....will she Liv?”

 

Olivia turned on her Mama’s lap so they were face to face, looking up at her Mama she softly asked “What is disap...point...ed mean Mama?”

 

“Disappointed is like when you think something is gonna be good but it turns out to be bad, so you are disappointed because it wasn’t what you wanted”

 

“Ok.....You won’t be disa..pointed Auntie Rae..I promise”

 

“Well good then” Raven responded smiling at her niece reaching forward and gently tapping Olivia’s nose. Just as she did that Oscar came rushing forward jumping onto his Auntie Raven’s lap “Hey Handsome”

 

“Hi Auntie Rae.....Mommy said I can sit with you”

 

“She did....you don’t have to, you can sit with Mommy if you want” Raven added not wanting her nephew to sit with her because he didn’t want her to sit alone.

 

“But I want to Auntie Rae....then I can tell you when all the good parts happen”

 

“Perfect, you can help me keep track”

 

“Yeah I can....It’s gonna be loads of fun...it’s the bestest film in the world” Raven smiled at the little boy’s words watching him as he snuggled into her, looking over at his Mommy and softly saying “I’m ready now Mommy, you can press play.....” Seeing the small reminding look his Mama gave him he added “Please Mommy” Oscar looked up at his Mama seeing the smile on her face, he smiled himself realising she wasn’t angry at him for forgetting his manners. Leaning forward he pursed his lips at her, Lexa smiled leaning down a kissing her son quickly, then the opening music of the film played out gaining his attention. He let out a small squeal of excitement clapping his hands and wriggling in excitement at the exact same time as his twin sister did.

 

Raven and Lexa shared a small smirk and laugh at the twins identical actions, Lexa turned her attention to her left seeing Clarke moving towards her, she watched as Clarke sat down beside her resting herself in the bend of the couch, adjusting the volume so it was not too loud or too low she looked gently threw the remote forward, laying herself further back relaxing against the back of the couch, she watched as Clarke adjusted herself so that she was facing Olivia her back now resting against the back of the couch. As Clarke stopped moving her, she turned her attention to the film, until Olivia looked down at her Mommy excitement filling her face as she began looking between her two Mommies. After a few seconds she excitedly shuffles off her Mama’s lap, she positioned herself between her Mommy and her Mama resting her head against her Mama’s chest as she reached over and gently grabbed her Mommy’s hand. Clarke and Lexa shared a happy glance before they both finally turned their complete attention to the film.

 

* * *

 

**-Two Hours Later – 18:00 –**

Clarke and Lexa entered the kitchen, they’d watched Sleeping Beauty without a single word coming from Olivia, and with Oscar quietly telling his Auntie Rae when all the good bits were coming up. When that movie had finished Oscar went on to tell Raven about Tangled and how it was an even better film than Sleeping Beauty, Raven had joked with him that there was no way that any film could be better. And before they knew it they were watching Tangled, Oscar excitedly staying sat with his Auntie Rae. As the movie played out, Clarke noticed the time and told everyone she had to start making dinner, she’d got up and walked to the kitchen, not even ten minutes later Lexa had walked into the kitchen telling Olivia had fallen asleep. Then asking if Clarke needed any help;

 

“I’m fine thanks; it should only take twenty minutes”

 

“Before I forget, Oscar getting upset was about him thinking I’m never coming home...some kid in his class said something about his Daddy never coming home and he thought that meant I was never coming back home. I explained to him that’s not how it works, I didn’t tell him why I couldn’t move back yet, but I promised him that I was coming back home really soon. He seemed ok with it, I told him that if he gets upset he has to talk to you or me, he agreed...and he seems ok now”

 

“Ok...”

 

“Ok? That’s it”

 

“Yeah, I trust you Lexa I know whatever you told him would have been what he needed to hear and the truth”

 

“Ok thanks...”

 

“You’re welcome...Plus when he hugged me, he told me that he was sorry he got upset and that he was ok now because Mama explained everything to him”

 

“Ah so he put a good word in for me” Lexa responded smirking and softly laughing as Clarke nodded her head at her, as the laugh died in her face she softly asked “Are you sure? I don’t mind getting my hands dirty”

 

“I know you don’t....but I’ve got it covered”

 

“Cool, well I’m just gonna stay in here and keep you company then”

 

“And what makes you think I want your company?”

 

“Well I’m me for one, and second you wouldn’t be cruel enough to make me go back in there and watch another Disney movie” Lexa explained smirking at Clarke, leaning against the island counter continuing to watch Clarke’s every move.

 

“Your right.....I wouldn’t be that cruel” Clarke smirked turning back looking at Lexa for a second before continuing to place the meatballs into a marinade of sauce, lifting the tray containing the meatballs and sauce, she moved over to the oven opening the door and bending down placing the tray into the oven and turning it on.

 

“That’s how it is huh?”

 

“How what is Lex?” Clarke asked amused looking back at Lexa for a second before turning her attention back to the oven and turning up the temperature to where she needed it to be. Standing up she turned walking over to Lexa, leaning on the counter reaching for the pad that was always left in the middle of the island counter, grabbing the pen she began writing a list of a few things she needed when she went shopping, once she was finished writing she turned to look at Lexa, seeing her wife’s eyes were scanning her body she innocently asked “What are you looking at?”

 

“Nothing...nice jeans though”

 

“Nice jeans or nice butt....” Clarke asked raising her eyebrows making Lexa laugh softly

 

“Ok, so I was eyeing you up, it’s my duty as a wife to ensure that you look as hot as always”

 

“You think I look hot right now?”

 

“Now I didn’t say that did I?”

 

“No, no you didn’t it’s a shame really, because you may have gotten a gift of thanks”

 

Clarke pushed herself off the counter and began to walk around the island counter, walking around it towards the kitchen table, avoiding walking across Lexa, instead walking the opposite way. She didn’t make it far as Lexa quickly moved towards Clarke, gently wrapping her arms around Clarke’s waist from behind pulling the Blonde into her chest. Softly she whispered into Clarke’s ear “What kind of gift would I get?”

Clarke couldn’t help but laugh softly at the comment, slightly turning her head so she could see Lexa in t he corner of her eye. “Well I guess we’ll never know”

 

“You’re a terrible tease Clarke Woods”

 

“I know it’s great isn’t it”

 

“Sometimes yeah....” Lexa responded smirking as she leant forward placing a gentle kiss on Clarke’s shoulder before softly adding “By the way....your butt looks amazing in those jeans” Clarke let out a small giggle before she turned around in Lexa’s arms, now they were face to face, Lexa smiled down at her wife resting their foreheads together she softly said “Also, you look beautiful?”

 

“I look like a mess...but thank you”

 

“Don’t put yourself down babe....you look amazing, almost mind blowing”

 

Clarke smiled brightly at the comment before softly and playfully asking “Almost mind blowing?”

 

“Yeah...well your still dressed and you’re not revealing any cleavage so it’s an almost for now”

 

“So what kind of cleavage will swing me looking Mind Blowing?”

 

“Well it’s not at kind of cleavage your think of...it’s your eyes...there’s a certain way you look at me that completely blows my mind”

 

“And here was me thinking it was this kind of cleavage” Clarke responded using her hand to move the V section of her t-shirt lower exposing the top of her breast for Lexa to see, hoping she wasn’t pushing Lexa or upsetting her in anyway, but if she was honest she was just doing what she was used to with Lexa. She was doing what Lexa told her to, she was relaxing “I can cover them up if you’re not interested”

 

“Well I didn’t say that did I?” Lexa responded looking into Clarke’s eyes for a few seconds before her attention moved lower again. Without realising what she was doing Lexa bit her bottom lip softly. Clarke let out a small smile before she softly asked;

 

“How’s the view?”

 

“It’s amazing...” Lexa let out, realising what she’d just said, Lexa snapped out of her tranche like gaze. Looking up at Clarke ready to apologise, before she had a chance to say a word, Clarke had leant forward connecting their lips together. Instantly she kissed Clarke back realising how much she’d missed kissing the blonde over the last two days. Their lips stayed connected for a minute or so, neither was sure, before Clarke pulled back smiling and biting the corner of her bottom lip as she looked at Lexa. Lexa smiled back leaning forward hugging the blonde and kissing the inside of her shoulder as she softly whispered “Two days is too long”

 

“For what exactly?” Clarke asked wrapping her arms on Lexa’s shoulders holding onto the brunette

 

“To not kiss you....it’s way too long for my liking”

 

“It is a long time 48 Hours....or 2880 minutes, depending on how you wanna measure it of course” Lexa pulled back laughing at Clarke’s comment, leaning forward connecting their lips together again. As Lexa pulled back, Clarke honestly responded “Either way its way too long”

 

“Agreed” Lexa smiled back leaning forward again reconnecting their lips. As they continued to kiss, a small voice caused them to break apart:

 

“Mama...Mommy”

 

They both let out a small cough and licked their lips removing their arms from each other and stepping backwards trying to act as normal as possible. They tried to avoid letting the twins see them kissing or doing more than quickly hugging each other, they knew that the twins would let their minds run off with them, and could result in them both thinking their Mama was coming home when Clarke and Lexa both knew it wasn’t that simple. Turning to Olivia, they both say her rubbing her eyes with her hands, neither was sure if she’d seen them kissing or not. Leaning against the counter Lexa was the first to speak;

 

“What’s wrong Princess?”

 

Olivia walked forward through the kitchen until she was stood in front of them. “You were gone Mama” She softly explained moving forward and leaning against Lexa’s legs, her arms gently gripping onto Lexa’s jeans. Lexa and Clarke could both hear the upset in their daughter’s voice. Gently reaching down Lexa ran her hand through Olivia’s hair;

 

“I’m sorry princess; I just came to talk to Mommy.” Lexa explained, reaching down she lifted Olivia off the floor and onto her chest, Olivia instantly rested her head on her Mama’s shoulder her arms wrapping around under her Mama’s arms wrapping around and holding on to her Mama’s stomach. “You ok princess?”

 

“Yeah, I just miss you Mama”

 

“I miss you too princess, all the time.”

 

“Me too Mama”

 

“I’m sorry you miss me princess”

 

“It’s ok Mama...” There was a small silence before Olivia gently lifted her head looking at her Mama and softly asked “Mama...when are you coming back home? To live Mama not to visit?”

 

“I don’t know Princess....but me and Mommy were talking and we think really soon...maybe a few more weeks”

 

“Will you be home before my birthday Mama?”

 

“I hope so Princess...but I’ll be here when you wake up on your birthday...no matter what”

 

Olivia’s face lit up as she looked at her Mama a small gasp escaping her mouth as she asked “Really Mama”

 

“Really”

 

“You promise Mama”

 

“I do....in fact I Mama Promise...which you know means I can’t break it” At her Mama’s words Olivia’s arms shoot from around her Mama to up in the air “That make you happy Princess?”

 

“Very happy Mama....the happiest most happy ever”

 

“That sounds like a lot of happiness” Lexa laughed looking at her daughter leaning forward she kissed her on the cheek “I’m glad” Olivia wrapped her arms around her Mama, leaning forward again hugging her Mama “Ok, let’s leave Mommy to make dinner...we can continue watching Tangled”

 

“Auntie Rae and Oscar are watching Beauty and the Beast now Mama....and Aunt Rae was talking to Aunt Octavia on the phone”

 

“That’s good....well let’s go watch Beauty and the Beast then” Lexa softly said looking down at her daughter seeing her nod in response. Mentally she made a note to talk to her sister about her apparent phone call with Octavia. Smiling at Clarke she pushed herself off the counter, walking towards the living room, glancing back once at Clarke the two women shared a smile before Lexa continued into the living room.

 

Once they were back in the living room Lexa and Olivia rejoined Oscar and Raven, Raven was no longer on the phone so Lexa guessed she’d finished talking to Octavia already. Not thinking too much into it she continued watching the film, Olivia stayed attached to her chest not jumping off or removing herself in anyway. Thirty Minutes Later Clarke was bringing in plates of food, deciding to let the twins eat in the living room, even though this dinner was messier than their normal dinner, and even though their kitchen table would fit all 5 of them. She also knew they were enjoying their time with their Mama and Aunt Raven. Plus if she was honest she was enjoying it as well, being able to relax and know she wasn’t the only one in the house that could help the twins if needed. Carrying in all the plates two at a time, she walked back into the living room seeing Oscar, Olivia, Lexa and Raven were all waiting for her to eat. Thanking them all, she sat down next to Lexa and Olivia, all five of them beginning to eat at the same time.

 

Once they had all eaten Clarke attempted to collect the plates only to be stopped by Raven who told her she’d take care of cleaning them. To her surprise Oscar jumped up offering to help his Auntie Rae, he carefully carried his and Olivia’s plates into the kitchen walking along side his Auntie Rae. Olivia on the other hand stayed with her Mama and Mommy, after a second Olivia climbed onto her Mama’s lap snuggling into her chest; she held her arm out for her Mommy, who instantly took hold of her hand holding onto it. Clarke watched as Olivia just watched her, holding her and hand as she rested against her Mama. She could see how content her daughter was with her Mama and for a second she felt sadness, sadness that because of her issues her daughter had missed out on being with her Mama every day. She knew Olivia and Lexa had a special connection, just like her and Oscar; it’d always been that way since the twins had been born. Leaning forward Clarke placed a gentle kiss on her daughter’s forehead smiling when she noticed Olivia smile.

 

“Are you ok Princess?”

 

“Mama is comfy Mommy”

 

“She is isn’t she?”

 

“Yeah, I like it Mommy....it makes me feel happy”

 

“Is that why you’re smiling?”

 

“Yeah”

 

Lexa smiled at the words placing a gentle kiss on her daughter’s head, bringing her hand to gently stroke through Olivia’s hair. “It makes me happy as well Princess” Olivia lifted her head up instantly pushing off her Mama a massive smile on her face, leaning forward she placed a sloppy kiss on her Mama’s cheek before giggling and hugging her Mama tightly. Lexa enjoyed this moment, a moment she didn’t many off at the moment, hugging Olivia back she began talking to her, thankful for being able to do that. Over the last few months so much had changed and she couldn’t help but be thankful for the chances she was getting now, she was always scared she was missing out on so much; she even thought the twins might have forgotten her. And now to be getting everything back was one of the best feelings in the world for her, there was nothing that compared to it. And as much as she hated seeing Raven go through a painful situation, she was grateful that Octavia had come clean and that Clarke finally believed her, because she knew that meant that the one thing that she had wanted for the last year would be hers soon. She’d be back home living with her wife and her kids, being the family that she’d always wanted ever since she met Clarke. And knowing that for sure she was going to get it all back, made her happy, not just in this moment but every moment of the day no matter what she was doing.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So What do we all think? I personally love writing all the stuff with Olivia and Oscar, their so fun to write for....anywho the ONE spoiler (kind of) for the next chapter is.....CLEXA DATE TIME....lol So to explain a little more and maybe to tease you all a little more as well haha the next chapter will be all CLEXA until the last section which will involve a plot twist if you will, plus Lexa is brutally honest with Clarke about how she was treated by Clarke during the break up...but back to the twist...what kind of twist? ....can Clarke and Lexa really move on? or do they decide to call it quits? Does the twist come from them or someone else? Has Octavia told the whole truth or has she been holding back? the possibilities are endless but needless to say it'll be a good one :-) So until next time Peeps and Peepettes Stay Safe & Keep Fanficing :-)


	22. Love Making Madness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm adding this in Now (16-06-17) as I just realised I forget to place this note in the chapter on Monday when I posted it....So anyways, I wanna say a MASSIVE..THANK YOU to Phoenixdjones who wrote the Sex Scene in this chapter...and will be my Beta for the rest of this story....and will of course be writing more parts of the chapter...so anyway just wanted to give her that shoutout and thanks :-)

** Chapter 22-Love Making Madness **

** One Week Later –Saturday Night 22:00 **

Clarke slowly opened the front door of the house; her right hand still holding onto Lexa’s pulling her inside the house. Pulling Lexa across herself until she was behind her, Clarke closed the door, turning around she reconnected their lips together, as sudden burst of lust rushing through her body. Instantly Lexa kissed her back pulling Clarke closer to her until their hips were pressed together, Lexa’s arms wrapped around Clarke’s waist pulling them impossibly closer, the kiss naturally deepening. Clarke moved herself backwards keeping her hands on Lexa’s neck holding the brunette close to her, as she took a few steps backwards she turned them both around pushing against Lexa until she felt them hit the door, she could feel Lexa smirk into the kiss, making her deepen the kiss more. Clarke kept herself pressed against Lexa, in turn keeping Lexa pressed against the door, the kiss continuing on for what felt like hours before Lexa pushed off the door, reaching back with her right hand making sure the door was locked, Lexa walked forward causing Clarke to start walking backwards, trusting Lexa not to let her fall. Without warning Lexa moved to the couch sitting down causing their kiss to break for a second, Clarke stood up straight looking down at Lexa lust filling her eyes as she looked into Lexa’s seeing that same lust she was feeling looking back at her. Not saying a word Clarke moved forward straddling Lexa’s lap, every part of Clarke wanted Lexa but she could still feel that slight amount of doubt in her mind. Pushing that doubt down inside herself, she reconnected their lips getting lost in feeling Lexa close to her again.

 

They stayed like this for nearly ten minutes before Lexa finally found the strength to pull herself back and break the kiss. Looking up breathlessly at Clarke she licked her lips and took a breath in, seeing the worry creep onto

Clarke’s face she quickly explained “I just need a break...for like five minutes...otherwise I might actually explode”

 

Clarke laughed at the sentence resting her forehead against Lexa’s kissing her once more she removed herself from

Lexa’s lap “Well I can’t have that....I’m gonna get you a herbal tea whilst I get my coffee...then maybe we can watch a film together”

 

“Sounds perfect” Lexa responded watching Clarke as she walked out of the room, after a second taking a few deep breaths she pulled out her phone. Pulling up her text conversation with Raven she typed a message:

 

**Lexa: How’s your night going?**

**Raven: Not bad...Zachary is asleep now so I’m all alone with Netflix**

**Raven: How’s your night going? I hope this message is just a check in**

**Lexa: It is...I wanted to check on you and calm myself**

**Raven: Ah thanks for checking in Sis** **☺** **Why do you need to calm down?**

**Lexa: Me and Clarke may have been making out and I may have had to stop it because I was getting a little too excited**

**Raven: It’s a good thing you’re not a man really**

**Raven: Is that a bad thing you getting excited?**

**Lexa: I don’t know, it doesn’t feel like it....but I don’t wanna rush things.**

**Lexa: What if we have sex and things aren’t the same?**

**Raven: It won’t , you love her and she loves you, you don’t need to worry about anything else**

**Raven: Just relax and let it go wherever it goes**

**Raven: Don’t over think or panic....it’s Clarke**

**Lexa: You're right, I’m over thinking this**

 

Lexa let out a small breath of relief relaxing her body and calming herself down. She knew she was overreacting,

Raven was right this was her and Clarke, and nothing mattered other than the fact that they loved each other. She was brought out of the thoughts when Clarke re-entered the living room, smiling at her softly, as she was about to talk her phone vibrated again and Lexa looked down at the phone

 

**Raven: I know I’m right, I’m me ;-P**

**Raven: Oh and get it sis lol just kidding...relax and go with the flow**

**Raven: And tell her what you promised me you would**

 

Lexa laughed at her sister’s message shaking her head before putting the phone in her pocket again, just as she did

Clarke handed her a cup of Herbal Tea, she smiled as the blonde moved across the room grabbing the remote and sitting down in the corner of the couch, space now between them. As she turned the TV on Clarke softly asked:

 

“Everything ok Lex?”

“Yeah everything is great” Lexa responded standing up and moving to sit next to Clarke, getting as close to the blonde as she could “No sad films remember”

 

“But those films are so good”

 

“Yeah but they kind of ruin the sexy feel of a date night don’t you think?”

 

“Maybe they do......and we don’t want that right?”

 

“No we don’t...we want a sexy vibrant night for us...no movies that will make you cry”

 

“Ok... think I can find something we both like, that won’t make us cry” Clarke softly responded, taking in a deep breath she turned her attention to the TV. As Lexa gently moved her arm to rest on the top of the back of the couch, the action causing them to move closer together, Clarke took a deep breath in; she could feel the spark rushing through her body at the feeling of having Lexa so close to her. Clarke found a film pressing play as the film began to play Clarke leant into Lexa a little more, enjoying the smell of Lexa’s perfume as it filled her nose. The film played on, both of them drinking their respective drinks until they were gone, once the cups were empty Lexa placed hers on the coffee table, taking Clarke’s cup and placing it next to hers. As soon as her hands were free Clarke shuffled back into Lexa a little more, as she did Lexa’s arms wrapped around the blonde holding her close.

 

Ten minutes later, Clarke turned into Lexa more holding onto Lexa’s arm gently with her hands. Almost as if, she let go then Lexa would disappear and she would wake up alone in bed like this was all a dream. Lexa reached forward with her free hand (her right), placing it over the top of Clarke’s right hand removing it from her arm, interlocking their fingers she rested their hands on her lap. Clarke looked back at Lexa smiling at the gesture she leant up connecting their lips together softly for a second before turning back to the TV, resting her head against Lexa’s shoulder. The time ticked on and at some point, Clarke had looked up at Lexa and before they knew it they were making out again and the end credits were rolling the music making them break apart, they looked at each other and they softly laughed. Clarke grabbed the remote clicking ‘Ok’ not bothering to look at the film that had been selected. Instead, she just dropped the remote and reconnected her lips to Lexa’s. Instantly feeling a spark of sexual desire and lust rush through her, without second guessing herself she deepened the kiss moving herself up pushing against Lexa their chest pressing together. As she leant against Lexa, her weight pushed against Lexa’s chest and the brunette fell backwards her hands moving to hold onto Clarke’s hips so the blonde didn’t fall from the couch. Clarke was thankful that Lexa didn’t pull away but instead she lifted her head up allowing her to deepen the kiss. The kiss got deeper and deeper as it continued on and on, until every ounce of lust and desire inside Clarke overpowered any amount of fear or worry she had inside, and without a second thought she rolled off of Lexa grabbing her hand and pulling her to stand up. As soon as Lexa stood up Clarke closed the gap between them, reconnecting their lips again, slowly she moved backwards heading towards the stairs as soon as Lexa realised what exactly Clarke was thinking she broke the kiss, looking breathlessly at Clarke she softly said:

 

“We don’t have to do anything more than kiss Clarke....that’s not what tonight was about”

 

“I know it wasn’t about that Lex...” Clarke responded unable to the smile on her from spreading as she stepped forward so her and Lexa were chest to chest, looking up she honestly spoke “I know this was about us reconnecting and you didn’t even think about sex... it wasn’t about sex for me either, it was about getting to spend time with you and to be us again. I know I’ve been a terrible wife over the last year, and no matter how much you deny it, I know it’s true...But I do love you, more than I’ve loved anyone in my life and more than I thought I could ever love anyone. And tonight everything has been so perfect that I just want it to stay that way, I know you’re not moving back in yet, but we have the whole night....and then the whole day tomorrow to just be us....it’s just you and me and

I want to make the most of it, I know it won’t mean that we’re suddenly fixed and that everything is perfect again...but I want this...and I want you in every possible way you could imagine....we don’t have to if you're not ready, if you think this is too soon then just say...”

 

“Are you kidding?....I’ve wanted this since that second first kiss months ago....everything you do drives me crazy and not in a psycho killer kind of way but in a...I wanna rip your clothes off kind of way...I just don’t want you to rush, I’m happy to wait for you...”

 

“I think you waited long enough for me Lex...”

 

“I’d wait for eternity if I had to...you know that...”

 

“This is so happening...you can’t say thing like that to me and not expect me to ravish you”

 

Lexa smiled at the response, letting out a single laugh at her wife’s craziness of a response “I’m being serious, I don’t want you to think that because of everything that happened you have to push yourself back into this full throttle,

I’m happy waiting as long as you need me to....I just want you to be happy”

 

“I am happy, the happiest I’ve been in over a year Lexa...and the more we kiss and act like we used to the more I fall even deeper in love with you, if that’s even possible...I am happy and that’s all because of you and how you make me feel..I’m working through all my emotions and my feelings and knowing you’re not giving up on me is what makes it so much easier for me to do....knowing I’ve got you and the twins no matter what, it keeps me going even on the bad days, I can call you and just hearing your voice makes everything ok” Clarke honestly revealed a tear spilling from her eyes, as Lexa reached up and wiped it away her hands stayed on Clarke’s cheeks, moving her hands so they were wrapped around Lexa’s wrist as she held onto them gently, softly saying “You're all I want right now...and everything I need”

 

“And you’re a Million Percent sure?”

 

“A Billion Percent sure, Lexa....I want you....I want this”

 

“Ok”

 

That was all Lexa said, making Clarke look at her in slight confusion “Ok?...” Was all Clarke managed to get out as

Lexa removed her hands from her Clarke’s cheeks causing the blonde’s grip on her wrist to release instantly, moving her arms quickly to Clarke’s waist lifting the Blonde off the floor and onto her shoulder. Clarke let out a small squeal as Lexa quickly carried her up the stairs, once she reached the top of the stairs Lexa placed Clarke gently down on the landing. Not another word was needed between them as Clarke stepped forward connecting their lips together, her hands moving and gripping onto the material of Lexa’s shirt pulling her closer. As they moved in sink backwards, Clarke’s hands began working on the buttons of Lexa’s shirt slowly undoing them one by one until the shirt fell open at the front, just as they moved past the twin’s bedroom door. Not breaking the kiss

Clarke moved her hands up to the material of the shirt that covered Lexa’s shoulders; gripping onto it she pushed it backwards, pushing it all the way down Lexa’s arms until it was at her wrists, without a word needed Lexa did the rest of the work pulling her wrists free of the material letting the shirt drop to the floor. As soon as her hands were free of the material around them, Lexa moved her hands to Clarke’s shirt grabbing the light material in her hands she lifted it up, only removing her lips from Clarke’s for second, as soon as the material was out of the way their lips reconnected as Lexa dropped Clarke’s top on the floor.

 

As the moved through the door of their bedroom, Lexa’s hands had found their way to the button on Clarke’s jeans, undoing them without hesitation or thought, or indeed without any problems, as they reached the bed Clarke stopped moving backwards knowing exactly where they were, letting Lexa lean against her and slowly lay her down, breaking the kiss. Lexa began slowly and methodically kissing her way down Clarke’s neck, continuing to her collarbone, then down and over Clarke’s bra clad breasts, not stopping she continued kissing her way down the

Blonde’s torso. Placing kisses down Clarke’s stomach as she made her way to the waistband of her wife’s jeans, she continued kissing her way downwards every kiss placed with pure love and care, once she reached the waistband she started quickly undoing the button. Lexa gripped onto the material on either side of the button looking up at

Clarke seeing the Blonde had her eyes closed and her head leaning back against the bed. Smirking to herself and not hearing any protests Lexa pulled the material downwards, carefully sliding it down Clarke’s legs until they were at her ankles, carefully she removed the jeans from Clarke’s ankles before roughly throwing the clothing behind her not caring where it landed. Turning her attention instantly back to Clarke, moving forward a few steps she leant down placing gentle kisses from Clarke’s knees upwards moving upwards until she was at the top of the Blonde's

thighs, placing a gentle kiss on Clarke’s inner right thigh she placed more kisses on Clarke’s upper thigh moving upwards, until she was again kissing Clarke’s stomach this time kissing her way upwards over Clarke’s breast until they were face to face again.

 

Lexa pushed herself up a little, for a moment she just looked down at Clarke, taking in every nano inch of the blonde’s features. She could work out how Clarke seemed more beautiful to her than she did a year ago, it was like the time they had apart had only made her realise just how amazingly beautiful the blonde was. She suddenly found herself lost in her own thoughts, just staring at the blonde. She was brought out of her gazing when she felt Clarke’s fingers brushing along her jawline, blinking her eyes a few times she refocused just in time to hear Clarke ask “Is something wrong?” Lexa shook her head softly, swallowing back softly, a smile still plastered on her face.

 

“No.....I um....I just forgot how beautiful you are” Lexa softly responded looking down. Clarke felt her throat go dry every ounce of moisture in her mouth disappearing completely at Lexa’s words. She’d forgotten how much she missed those compliments from Lexa, how the brunette always found a way to make her feel like she was the most beautiful woman in the world with just one sentence. She knew this feeling all too well, and god how she’d missed it, not being able to find any words to respond, feeling that overwhelming rush of desire quickly boiling over inside her. Looking into Lexa’s eyes she could see everything she’d missed over the last year, every ounce of love and compassion, desire, fear and even rage all burning deep inside Lexa’s eyes, the lust and desire overpowering everything else. Wanting to know this was real Clarke leant up, her lips hovering over Lexa’s for a second before she quickly leant forward connecting their lips together. Within a split second, Lexa was kissing Clarke back, the passion both of them were feeling exploding into the kiss as their lips worked together. As they kissed Clarke moved her hands down to Lexa’s jeans undoing the button and shuffling them as far back as she could without breaking the kiss. Once they were as far as they could go Clarke broke the kiss breathless slightly at the passion that was flowing through both of them. She hurriedly leant forward her body rubbing against Lexa’s, the brunette instantly knew why Clarke was rushing and gently but firmly placed her hand on Clarke’s shoulder moving the blonde until she was leant backwards, her hands pressed on the bed holding her upper body upright. “Relax ok...” At the words Clarke released a breath she wasn’t even sure she was holding “This isn’t a dream...or a race in fact...we have all the time in the world Clarke...”

 

The Words made Clarke smile even more than she thought was possible at this moment; the smile was more one of relief than anything else. No matter how long they’d make out or how many days went passed with everything being ok between them she couldn’t help but think she was dreaming. That everything that was happening was one massive dream, and she was going to wake up any minute now, alone in her bed with nothing but regrets. Taking in a small breath Clarke felt a bubble of fresh desire inside herself, without a second thought she spun her and Lexa until she was straddling the brunette her hands resting on her wife’s bare stomach running her fingers over Lexa’s abdomen taking in every single change in Lexa’s muscles as her fingers moved. She felt Lexa’s hands move to her hips gently gripping on to her panties, leaning down she kept her left hand on Lexa’s stomach whilst her right hand came to rest on the bed right next to Lexa’s elbow. Connecting their lips together for a minute before pulling back and looking into Lexa’s eyes softly uttering a simple sentence “We have all night” The sentence lit a spark inside

Lexa’s eyes, seeing that look, shivers ran down Clarke’s spine as she realised she didn’t want to rush this moment, that rushing their first time making love in over a year wasn’t even an option, and she knew that no matter how long they took, no matter how long the night went on, she was going to enjoy every moment of their reunion. So she bent down and softly took in Lexa’s lips, the sweet taste of tea still lingering on them. It was meant to stay soft but a spark was ignited when Lexa let out a moan and Clarke sucked in her bottom lip. Clarke caught that moan and embraced it, she ravished in it, it made her jump into action. She spread Lexa’s legs gently open and softly dragged her fingertips up the insides of her legs making it a point to just avoid the area they so badly wanted Clarke to be.

Clarke could feel the heat radiating off of her soft pussy, she could see the sweet, slick juices running down. Clarke so badly wanted to jump in and drown in all the glory that was Lexa, but Clarke wanted her to be worshiped, wanted her to be appreciated. So Clarke continued her gentle strokes up and down her thighs, she bent down and took Lexa’s pert nipple into her mouth sucking and rolling it into her skilled mouth. Lexa arched her back wanting more, more pressure, more closeness, more Clarke. Clarke switched breasts giving it just as much attention as the first. Moving from her breasts up her chest, to her neck, sweetly nipping, leaving little red marks along the way she made it to Lexa’s ear. Clarke nibbled on her earlobe, knowing how much Lexa enjoyed it, how weak it made Lexa.

She then sucked it in her mouth letting it out with a big pop. Lexa moaned and instantly put her hands roughly in Clarke's hair, pulling her in closer, giving her better access to her ear and neck. Not being able to take much more

Clarke stopped her soft strokes between Lexa’s legs, grabbed both her arms from her hair and held them above Lexa’s head. Clarke bent down and whispered in Lexa’s ear “I want to hear you!, don't hold back.” and before Lexa had time to take in what Clarke said Clarke had two fingers knuckle deep into Lexa’s wet, silky pussy. Minutes went by as she continued to thrust into Lexa as she threw her head back and arched her back letting out a moan she never even knew she was holding in her throat. Her hands flew to Clarke’s back, nails dragging down and she begged Clarke for more. “Harder Clarke, ohhh how... ohh..I… ughh ohh..Missed.. this.” Clarke being lost in her own mind quickly turned Lexa over onto her stomach and helped guide her ass in the air. Clarke without stopping continued to take Lexa from behind, feeling how deep she was in Lexa again made her own pussy begin to drip.

Clarke could feel that spongy spot inside Lexa, She could feel Lexa start to squeeze her fingers tightly together.

Clarke knew Lexa wouldn't be much longer. Lexa started to shiver “Clarke I’m so close, I need you. More.” Clarke took her other hand around Lexa’s waist to the front and slowly started circling her clit. It wasn't but 4 or 5 swirls before Lexa screamed at the top of her lungs sweet explicates and a mix of Clarke's name. That was all Clarke needed to fall over the edge with her. Just the sweet sound of Lexa, coming by her own hands.

* * *

 

  **Later that Night -2:30am-**

Clarke and Lexa lay in their bed sweat dripping quickly off their bodies, both of them struggling to catch their breaths after their hours of love making. After the first round, the two women had rested for ten minutes before they found themselves caught up in the passion and love they felt for each other, needless to say that continue to happen over and over as the night went on. Both of them took their time, taking in every single change that had occurred in the others bodies over the year, kissing every part of the other that they could without getting too carried away. Before they knew it, they’d made love four times in the five hours that had passed by, every time they both came with an amount of intensity they didn’t think was possible. And now they were both taking in as much

air as they could knowing that they were more than likely going to end up making love again. They had been laying next to each other for not even a minute before Lexa shuffled closer pressing her naked front into her wife’s back, feeling the motion Clarke pulled Lexa a little closer to her, her back pressed tightly against Lexa’s chest as Lexa’s right arm wrapped around Clarke’s neck and onto the bed, giving Clarke a makeshift pillow, Lexa’s left arm moved resting gently on Clarke’s waist. They both remained silent for a moment until Clarke softly spoke;

 

“That was way greater than I remember it being”

 

“Oh really now?”

 

Clarke knew Lexa was joking but still she turned her head slightly so she was looking up at the brunette “Yes really,

I forgot how intense and exhausting you are” Leaning up slowly she captured Lexa’s lips with her own, pulling back when she felt her stomach bubble with desire again “But I’m not going again....not for at least thirty minutes”

 

“I think I can give you a break...” Lexa placed a single kiss on Clarke’s shoulder as the blonde looked forward, bringing her left hand up to gently brush up and down Lexa’s left arm. “I’ve missed this.....the laying in bed together not the love making...though I have missed that as well”

 

“Me too” Clarke again looked back at Lexa their lips hovering near each other’s “I’ve really missed the way you smell” Clarke looked on in amusement as Lexa let out a small laugh at her words “What? I did”

 

“How exactly do I smell then Clarke?”

 

“You know how you smell Lexa”

 

“No I don’t....” Leaning forward pecking Clarke on the lips once before pulling back and adding “Come on please tell me”

 

“You smell like...roses...candy...and obsession”

 

“Obsession....so I smell like roses, Candy and my perfume”

 

“Hey Calvin Klein Obsession is my favourite perfume, I can’t help that I missed the way it smells”

 

“But then you didn’t miss the way I smell you missed how my perfume smells”

 

“No, its different...you smell unique...it sounds stupid but I can’t explain it, it just smells like you”

 

Lexa couldn’t help but smile at the comment, leaning down she captured Clarke’s lips with her own before she answered “I know what you mean...I’ve missed how you smell...Like pencils and paint mixed in with that sweetheart perfume you wear....nothing in the whole world smells like that...It’s amazing...my favourite smell in the whole world.” She honestly responded, before she could get out another word Clarke leant into her capturing her lips with her own. Within a second the blonde had deepened the kiss feeling the passion burning inside her again. Pulling back, Lexa looked down at Clarke softly saying “Nuh uh, thirty minute break remember...” Clarke laughed softly letting her head relax back against Lexa’s shoulder. They laid there in silence just taking in everything that had happened today, relaxing with each other as the silence filled the room, it was only broken nearly fifteen minutes later when Clarke opened her eyes finally finding the courage to ask;

 

“What does this mean for us?”

 

“I don’t know, it means we love each other and we want this to work out between us”

 

Clarke couldn’t admit it out loud but that wasn’t the answer she wanted to hear, opting not to upset Lexa or herself she simply replied “Ok...” Taking in a small breath she said the first thing that came into her head “If we’re gonna go again I need a coffee” Without waiting for a response she removed herself from Lexa’s gentle grip, sliding to the edge of the bed before standing up, walking over to the chest of drawers she grabbed a pair of shorts and one of

Lexa’s baggy Boston University t-shirts throwing them on she walked out of the bedroom not hearing Lexa asking where she was going, as she walked down the stairs tears forming in her eyes. She cursed herself inside not wanting to ruin this night; it had been perfect, from their date at the movies all the way to their love making session.

 

Walking into the kitchen, she didn’t hear Lexa call out her name, moving around she began making herself busy making a coffee. She stood at the kitchen counter thinking about how stupid she was to just walk out of the bedroom like that, she knew she was overreacting but she wanted her family back so bad that she couldn’t see anything else. And the last five hours had just made her want that even more, lying in Lexa’s arms wasn’t something she’d done for a long time but it was something she missed every night. As the kettle boiled she poured the water into the cup in front of her, cursing herself for walking out on Lexa, she wanted to go and explain but she just couldn’t make herself move. As she began to stir the coffee, she felt arms wrap around her waist. Instantly she knew it was Lexa, not because Lexa was the only other person in the house, but because she knew that smell, she knew those arms. The texture of Lexa’s arms the feeling that Lexa’s skin against hers gave her, it was all different, and there was nobody in the world that could give her that feeling. Closing her eyes, she instantly stopped stirring the coffee letting the spoon drop out of her fingers, resting both her hands on the counter she opened her eyes softly speaking “I’m sorry...I can’t control it...”

 

“I know” Lexa softly whispered into Clarke’s ear gently placing a kiss on Clarke’s shoulder. “But remember I’m here to help, but I can’t help or explain things to you if you don’t talk to me”

 

“I’m sorry; I just didn’t want to ruin the moment. I’m just being stupid and....well....me”

 

“Well for the record....I think you are pretty smart, and drop dead gorgeous” Lexa finished placing one more kiss on

Clarke’s shoulder she removed her hands, turning she gently slapped Clarke’s bum walking over to the table, smirking as she said “Make me a coffee please...I am exhausted” She watched as Clarke looked at her slightly stunned before a smile spread across her face and she turned forward making Lexa a coffee. Once she’d made the coffee, she placed the spoon in the sink picking up the two cups she carried them over to the table where Lexa was sitting, placing the cups –one blue and one green- on the table she smiled softly at Lexa going to walk to other side to sit in the chair. Before she could take even one step Lexa had gently grabbed her wrist pulling her backwards and down onto her lap, wrapping her arms around the blonde. As she sat down Clarke turned herself slightly so she could wrap her arms around Lexa’s shoulders, as she did she brought her left hand gently holding onto the Heda Twin Records t-shirt;

 

“Tell me what you were upset about” Lexa softly said running the fingers of her right hand lightly up and down

Clarke’s left arm, as it gripped gently onto her t-shirt. The action seemed to calm Clarke down as the blonde took a small breath in and spoke;

 

“I just let myself get emotional that’s all”

 

“What about exactly?”

 

“I just feel like this is all way too good to be true...like at some point you're going to realise that you made a mistake and you're gonna tell me this was all to get me back for everything and you're gonna dump me” Clarke honestly responded unable to look directly at Lexa, instead keeping her attention completely on her Lexa’s hand as it traced gently up and down her arm.

 

“That’s not gonna happen Clarke”

 

“You say that but I can’t help but think your hiding something”

 

“What like I’m pretending that I love you?”

 

“No but.....”

 

“Just be honest with me Clarke....I love you but I can’t answer your questions if you don’t ask them”

 

“Do you hate me?”

 

“Hate you for what?”

 

“You know what Lexa....for not believing you, for kicking you out, for you losing time with the kids for....”

 

“Everything?”

 

“Yes, for everything”

 

“I don’t hate you Clarke....Do you want me to be completely honest with you?” Clarke softly nodded her head at the brunette’s question “I don’t hate you...but I think I hold a little resentment towards you...” Lexa noticed the look of upset on Clarke’s face, she knew that look and she was sure that Clarke was going to get up and walk away, but to her surprise Clarke stayed where she was. “I wish I could say that I wasn’t but I can’t help it. I lost out on watching the twins grow up everyday, and not just that but seeing them everyday. Making them breakfast and helping them get dressed every day, I wish I didn’t feel they way I do Clarke but I can’t help it I’m only human....”

 

“I’m not upset Lex...well I am because I hate that I made you feel like that but I want you to be honest with me, without worrying about me getting upset. I want you to trust me with how your feeling.”

 

“I do trust you...I just don’t want to upset you”

 

“You won’t I promise....just be honest with me...that’s how this works right?”

 

“Yeah...ok...so I resent a lot but the thing I resent most except for missing out on the twins growing this last year....is you not trusting me....” Lexa noticed Clarke bite her bottom lip; she knew Clarke was going to blame herself so she continued trying to explain herself better. “I love you and that doesn’t change, I just....I resent that you didn’t trust me enough to believe what I said, to believe my word...instead you believed Octavia over me, without even finding out the full facts. And I know that you had a lot of things on your mind, but that doesn’t change how I feel, I would have never took someone else’s word over your and I never would but you did, without a second thought.”

 

“And you resent me for that?”

 

“I resent that it was so easy for you...I resent that no matter how hard I tried to make you believe me you wouldn’t...and if I’m honest I resent that you let Roan near my children.... that you let him touch you and kiss you...I really wish I didn’t Clarke but I can’t stop how I feel”

 

“I don’t want you too”

 

"You don't?"

 

“No, it’s natural to feel everything you're feeling Lexa. I know that you love me, and I can tell from the look in your eyes that you mean everything that you’ve said to me, that you want us to work…But if you're not honest with me like you want me to be with you, then I don’t think this will work….and I really want this to work…”

"Me too...I just don’t want you to think that I’m blaming you for everything because I’m not, I know Nia was a massive and convincing part of this…”

 

"I know, and I promise I won’t get emotional or blame myself but I need you to be honest with me….so you said you resent me, and I understand all the things you resent me for, and I know you and I know that you resent me for more than that so I want you to tell me”

 

“And your one hundred percent sure”

 

"I resent the fact that you didn’t need proof, I understand Octavia is your best friend and I understand your personal problems but you never once asked for my version of events, you just took someone else’s word over mine…someone you hate with a passion”

 

“I didn’t believe Nia”

 

“But you did Clarke, Octavia told you Nia said me and her slept together and you believed it. You believe Nia’s version of events more than you believed me when I said I didn’t do anything”

 

“Your right…. I know I was the world’s worst wife and there’s nothing I can say to make it up to you. Just tell me what I can do to stop you resenting me”

 

“I don’t know what you can do Clarke…. I don’t want to feel this but I’m human and the only person I’ve ever loved in this world gave up on me…. you need to give me time to process that and hopefully soon it’ll fade away”

 

“What If it doesn’t?”

 

“I still love you…no matter how much I might hold a little amount of resentment towards you, I won’t ever stop loving you…I just need time to work through it…just like you need time to work through you issues…”

“What if your resentment is too much for you?”

 

“It won’t be….I know how I feel and I know that in time I’ll get over it, I just need you to prove to me that you trust me again…”

 

“I think I can do that…as long as you let me prove I still love you as well…”

 

“Well I think the last five hours was proof enough don’t you…” Clarke couldn’t hold in her laugh at the sentence, after a second she coughed softly before Lexa added “As long as we keep talking and communicating we’ll be fine…”

 

Lexa thought back to her text messages from Raven, smirking softly to herself she continued “Plus we’ll be seeing each other every morning so I think in time the resentment will disappear...”

 

“Maybe you're right bu….” Clarke stopped talking for a moment as Lexa’s words sunk in, then she began thinking

about the words and what Lexa could mean by saying them, looking at Lexa she burrowed her brow her face contorting slightly as she asked her wife “What are you talking about every morning?”

 

Lexa smirked and laughed at Clarke’s reaction, her smirk disappeared and was replaced by a genuine smile as she looked at Clarke and explained “Me and Raven were talking the other day, and she decided that she wants to live alone…like completely…”

 

“Ok…”

 

“We were talking about me living on my own and how it helped me process a few things and how it made everything a little clearer for me to see when we did get back together…She told me she wants that, she wants to live alone because she’s never had that, a time to be alone and just think about herself…”

 

“And this led to her what…suggesting that you come here every morning for breakfast?”

 

“No, it led to her telling me that I should follow my heart and not worry about her, because she would be ok on her own….and that no matter where I lived she always come to me if she needed me…it also led to us talking about me following my heart no matter how much I loved her and wanted to be there for her every moment of the day…”

 

“What exactly are you saying Lexa?” Clarke asked removing herself from Lexa’s lap standing up and taking a step backwards to look at her, the hope clear for Lexa to see on her face

 

“I’m saying….that Raven told me to move back home…so as long as the offer still stands, I wanna move back home”

 

“Are you being serious?” Clarke asked tears’ building in her eyes as the emotion was clear in her voice for Lexa to hear, when Lexa nodded her head Clarke softly moved from up and down on her tiptoes, the action resembling the same one Olivia did when she was excited. “You’re not joking with me are you?” As the question left her lips, tears escaped her eyes, she watched Lexa stand up

 

“I’m one hundred percent serious Clarke…I wanna come home, I want to wake up every morning how we were about thirty minutes ago, just not always naked because of the twins obviously…” Clarke and Lexa both laughed at the sentence as Lexa slowly began walking over to Clarke “I want to go to sleep holding you in my arms, reminded of exactly why I’m so lucky to have you in my life…I want to see the twins just after they wake up, I want them to come running into our room in excitement then realise they forgot to knock, and then watch them get those cute pouts on their faces as they apologise for not knocking…I don’t want to have walk out the door knowing that I’m not coming back for at least 24 hours, knowing that’s gonna break their little hearts a tiny bit more than I already have done…” Lexa added a small tear escaping her eyes and running down her cheeks as she stopped about a foot away from Clarke “I just want us to be a family again….I need you Clarke….and I need our family”

 

“You're being serious right? ....this isn’t one of your really long and unfunny jokes”

 

“It’s not...I know we have a lot to work on, but I love you and I’ll be damned if I let Nia Gardia and her Neanderthal brother ruin everything we’ve built over the years...I promise that I’ll work on my resentment and my anger, as long as you promise to trust me....and yourself” Lexa honestly replied, not getting any response and not able to judge the blank expression on Clarke’s face she added “If you’ve changed your mind then you can just...”

 

“I haven’t....not one bit....I really want you to come home...” Clarke finally responded finally managing to untangle all the thoughts in her brain, just as tear rolled from her eye and down her cheek she took a step forward wrapping her arms around Lexa holding onto her tightly, as Lexa’s arms wrapped around her waist Clarke pulled back, leaning forward and connecting her lips lovingly and firmly with hers, the kiss was soft and smooth filled with nothing but pure happiness and love. Pulling back after what felt like an eternity of bliss, Clarke looked up at Lexa looking into her eyes and asking “Are you sure about this? ....I really want you home but I don’t want you to feel pressured by me”

 

Lexa brought her right hand up gently running it through the side of Clarke’s hair tucking it behind her wife’s ear, as she smiled down at Clarke softly responded “I want to come home...I’ve wanted to come home since we decided to try again, but I knew that we needed to wait until I was sure, until you were sure. I didn’t want to rush moving back in because I wasn’t sure you truly believed me...but now I know you do, and I know you're working on your

issues...and that means so much to me, you’ll never know how much it means to me...knowing how hard you're trying and how sorry you are, I know that I can trust you with all of me again, every single part...just like we used to, and part of getting back to where we were starts with me moving back home” She watched as Clarke smiled at her another tear rushing down her cheek as she leant forward, their lips connecting together again effortlessly. They kissed for a few minutes their lips working together, melting into each other not caring about anything more than just being together in this moment.

 

Minutes passed by and the kiss built a little more with every few minutes that passed by. Slowly, they moved backwards, taking a step at a time making sure neither of them tripped or fell over as they moved. As they moved across the room Clarke hit the kitchen island, as her body hit against Clarke’s Lexa broke the kiss, she was about to speak when Clarke reconnected their lips pulling Lexa impossibly closer, moving herself backwards she lifted herself onto the counter gripping onto Lexa’s shirt pulling her with her, breaking the kiss again she looked at Clarke smirking as she said “I thought the kitchen was a no no”

 

Clarke smirked at the comment, leaning forward harsh breathed she leant into Lexa kissing her again this time with a little more fire and passion than previously, as she pulled back she looked at her wife and responded “Call it a welcome home present” Lexa didn’t say another word she just smiled brightly reconnecting their lips, at the same time she climbed onto the kitchen counter, ignoring the pain that shoot through her kneecaps as she knelt her way up Clarke’s body, as Clarke moved herself up the counter a little more so she was secure on the large surface, once they both stopped moving Lexa looked down at Clarke, a natural smile on her face as she looked down at her wife taking a single breath before she leant down reconnecting their lips together, lowering her body onto Clarke’s as

Clarke’s hands moved underneath her t-shirt, using her right hand to hold herself up slightly Lexa lowered her body resting herself gently against Clarke’s leaning down more she reconnected their lips letting herself get completely lost in the feeling of Clarke against her.

* * *

 

  **An Hour later**

Lexa collapsed onto her wife, her breathing heavy and harsh, she could feel Clarke’s breathing was the same as the blonde’s whole body rose and fell against Lexa’s. Lexa laid against Clarke for a few minutes, the blonde’s hands gripping onto her gently as their clothes laid all over the kitchen after they’d both hurriedly removed them. After a few minutes laying against Clarke catching her breath with every second that passed by, until she was finally able to move herself, rolling her naked self off Clarke rolling to her right and Clarke’s left thankful that their kitchen island was so big. Looking up at the ceiling, Lexa smiled when she felt Clarke reach down grabbing her hand and intertwining their fingers, they remained there lying silently on the counter for moments, both beginning to feel the effects of their sixth love making session of the night. After a while, Clarke rolled onto Lexa’s side hugging into

her wife’s side, resting her head on Lexa’s shoulder her right arm lifting and resting across Lexa’s stomach, after a while she softly and huskily said;

 

“That was amazing...why have we never had sex on this counter before?”

 

“Sex huh?” Lexa smirked looking down at Clarke raising her eyebrows at her wife “That’s just cold, as cold as this counter on my naked butt cheeks”

 

“Oh I’m sorry....Why have we never made love on this counter before?” Clarke responded she could hear and see the playfulness in Lexa’s eyes as her wife looked at her. Leaning up she kissed Lexa once before raising her eyebrows waiting for a response “Well someone had this insane and slightly annoying...No love making in the kitchen rule”

 

“Oh yeah.....why did I come up with that in the first place?”

 

“I don’t remember....” Lexa responded looking down at Clarke, smiling as she looked at her suddenly she remembered why “Oh wait it was because when we were got married and moved in here you parents nearly caught us in here on this very counter”

 

“Oh my gosh I remember that...” Clarke let out her cheeks going red as the memory flashed her mind “We just managed to get to off that counter and dressed before they walked in, we pretended that they caught us getting carried away in a make out session...they never realised what we were actually having sex...sorry making love on the counter when they came in...”

 

“I hope they never realised what we were doing”

 

“They didn’t...they gave me the no kitchen sex rule, they enjoyed it more than they should have, they kept talking about how I shouldn’t let my lust control me...the amount of amusement they got from it that ‘talk’ I know they didn’t see anything because if they did then they’d have mentioned it believe me...”

 

“Oh I know, your parents are pretty hilarious when it comes to that stuff”

 

“Yeah oddly so” Clarke responded laughing softly up at Lexa, leaning up and softly connecting their lips for a second before she pulled back and sensibly said “We should probably get off her and get dressed, I know it’s late but

I don’t put anything past my parents”

 

“I doubt even your parents would turn up unannounced at nearly 4 in the morning”

 

“So you really wanna risk that Lexa?” Clarke responded getting a smirk from her wife, Lexa raised her eyebrows at her, seeing the look Clarke added “And my butt may be going numb”

 

“Ahhh that makes sense, you’ve always had a sensitive ass”

 

“I have not”

 

“You know you have...”

 

“So you're telling me your butt isn’t numb”

 

“Nope” Lexa responded as she removed herself from Clarke, swinging her legs to her left and carefully removing herself from the counter, lowering herself onto the floor, she looked around quickly moving around and picking up all the clothing, placing the clothes on the counter she noticed the questioning look that Clarke was giving her, knowing exactly what the look was about, Lexa grabbed her shorts quickly placing them on. Grabbing her t-shirt she slipped her arms into the holes, as she slipped the t-shirt over her head she said;

 

“Ok...maybe my butt’s been numb for about twenty minutes now”

 

“Lexa”

 

“What?”

 

“Why didn’t you just say? ...If you were in pain we could have moved a long time ago”

 

“I wasn’t in any pain...” Lexa explained as Clarke jumped down from the counter walked around to her in all her naked glory, as Clarke stopped in front of her she handed her wife the shorts she had previously been wearing, as

Clarke finished pulling the shorts up she moved a little closer to Lexa, stopping right in front of her leaning up she kissed Lexa once. Lexa picked up the Boston University T-shirt Clarke had been wearing, holding the t-shirt in her hand she helped Clarke put the shirt on as she spoke “I was enjoying the moment....plus you looked so happy and content I didn’t want to ruin it” As she finished speaking, Clarke’s head popped through the shirt and she leant forward kissing Lexa lovingly before she pulled back smiling as she softly spoke;

 

“You wouldn’t have ruined anything....as long as we’re together I’m beyond happy”

 

“Good” Lexa responded kissing Clarke once, she took hold of her wife’s hand walking past her and pulling her into the kitchen

 

“Babe I don't think I have the energy to go again...”

 

“We’re not....we’re going to watch Dreamgirls...”

 

“But you hate Dreamgirls because you think it makes Diana Ross look like a heartless bitch and you love Diana Ross”

 

“I know all that....and I still love Diana Ross...I just love you a million times more....and you love Dreamgirls so your gonna start watching whilst I clean the kitchen counter and make us fresh drink...then I’m gonna join you and we’re gonna cuddle until the early hours of the morning”

 

As they reached the couch, Lexa moved them around before gently pushing Clarke backwards until she was sitting down. Looking up at Lexa, Clarke couldn’t help but smile at the women’s sweetness “It’s already the early hours..”

 

“Ok Smarty pants...you won’t want a coffee then”

 

“Now I didn’t say that did I?” Clarke responded smirking up at Lexa, reaching up she gripped onto her Lexa’s t-shirt pulling her down connecting their lips together “Everything you said would be great....thank you”

 

“You’re welcome” Lexa responded pecking Clarke on the lips again “Now relax and enjoy the film whilst I clean and get you a coffee”

 

“Don’t take too long”

 

“I won’t I promise...” Lexa responded leaning down again kissing Clarke once before grabbing the remote and handing it to Clarke, kissing her again once before standing herself back up and turning around walking towards the kitchen disappearing into it. Clarke smiled to herself at Lexa’s kindness, before turning her attention to the TV she went about finding the film her wife had mentioned. Pressing play, keeping her attention on the screen in front of her Clarke couldn’t stop herself smiling, everything that had happened over the last right hours, everything she’s been hoping and wishing for over the last year was coming true, she’d wished that Lexa never cheated and now it turned out she hadn’t. Everything was falling back into place, but as she thought about it the more she felt guilty for pulling Lexa away from her Raven, she knew how much Lexa and Raven needed and loved each other and the more she thought about it the more she felt guilty. She couldn’t help but think that maybe Lexa was only moving back home to make her happy. As she got lost in her thoughts she completely forgot about the film, her mind focusing on the only thing she could seem to think about at the moment...Lexa. Her mind swirled, her thoughts spinning and twisting away with themselves until the woman that was controlling her thoughts came into the room holding their cups in either of her hands. Hearing the footsteps Clarke snapped out of her thoughts looking to Lexa and smiling brightly, “Hey” Was all she managed to get out as she smiled up at her wife.

 

“Hi” Lexa smiled back, she could see something was going on in Clarke’s mind and she knew that Clarke was lost in her own thoughts about something. She carried the cups over to the couch, sitting down and placing the cups on the coffee table in front of them, she smiled as Clarke looked to her left letting Lexa know her usual spot in the corner of the couch was free and waiting for her. Smiling at the motion from Clarke, Lexa stood up moving and sitting in the corner spot of the couch, as she sat back against the couch Clarke leant against her, as Clarke did that Lexa wrapped her right arm around Clarke’s shoulder; Clarke hugged into her side a little more taking in the smell she’d missed so much. As she looked down at Clarke, Lexa softly asked “What were you thinking about when I came back in? ....and don’t think about fibbing”

 

“I wasn’t going to fib.....I was thinking about you moving back in”

 

“What about it?”

 

“You’re doing this for us right? And because you want to ....not because you think you have to?”

 

“Of course, I want to come home...I don’t feel or think that I have to do for any reason...why do you think that?”

 

“I just don’t want for you to feel pressured into this; I don’t want you to feel like you have to leave Raven just to be with me”

 

“I don’t feel like that Clarke, not one bit...I know it might seem a little sudden and crazy considering I told you awhile ago that I wanted to be there for Raven...but she’s the one who told me it was ok, she wants us to follow our hearts and what we want, she doesn’t want me in her words ‘sacrificing’ my happiness to make her happy...and honestly she seems a lot happier, she’s having Zachary every weekend and she’s enjoying just being Raven at the moment, she’s never had that it was always me and her, or her and Octavia, and I think she needs that right now. So as far as Raven goes, she’s completely fine with it...in fact she’s gonna keep my apartment that way she doesn’t have to worry about getting to the studio or even here or her house if she needs to.”

 

“And you're sure that she’s being honest with you”

 

“Of course I am...I know my sister and I know when she’s lying....she wasn’t she was telling me the truth, I think she just wants to be her for a while without having to worry about anything but being her and being Zachary’s mother...I think it’s gonna be really good for her”

 

“You’re like one hundred percent sure?”

 

“Yes I am Clarke...”

 

“Great....” Clarke let out as a massive smile filled her face and she leant forward kissing Lexa lovingly, pulling back she rested her head against Lexa’s “I can’t wait to tell the twins...” Lexa laughed softly and smiled at the thought of telling Olivia and Oscar she was moving home. Leaning forward she happily connected her lips with Clarke, the kiss continued on, as things quickly escalated between them both the heat rising quickly as they both felt that fire erupt inside them again, the kiss that surely would have led to their eight love making session of the night was interrupted when Clarke heard her phone vibrating and ringing in the distance, breaking apart Clarke let out an annoyed mixture of a groan and moan, looking at Lexa she asked, “Who the hell is calling me at this time?” Seeing Lexa shrug her shoulders her face frowning slightly she leant forward kissing Clarke on the cheek;

 

“I don’t know but you better go check it in case it’s your parents...”

 

“Mmmmm your right, it’s probably Mom checking in before work....and sensing we’re about to get busy..She’s the walking version of a cock block....” Clarke laughed as she kissed Lexa a few more times before she stood up walking away and towards the staircase getting ready to rush up the stairs to find her phone, which she knew was in her jean pocket on their bedroom floor, as she walked up the stairs she laughed hearing Lexa say;

 

“Is it a cock block if neither of us has one?”

 

Ignoring Lexa’s comment Clarke rushed up the stairs and into the bedroom, finding her phone in her jeans pocket

removing it and seeing 3 missed call from her Mom, the panic rose inside her as her mind began to run wild, sliding the screen and unlocking her phone she quickly called her Mom back, as soon as the phone answered she began talking asking what was wrong, she was quickly cut off by her Mom’s voice:

 

“Clarke...why are you calling me so late?”

 

 

“You called me Mom” Clarke stated, her worry instantly turning into confusion “I’ve got three missed calls from you”

 

“I haven’t .....”

 

“What Mom, what is it?”

 

“Olivia is laying next to me, my phone was next to me and she seems surprisingly awake”

 

“She is?”

 

“Yeah....does she know how to unlock someone’s phone?”

 

“Only if you have the thumb print....she knows how to unlock it with someone else’s phone, she can do it without you noticing, and that’s why I only have a code on my phone”

 

“Ok, there’s your answer, I think someone else called you whilst me and Grandpa were sleeping....” Clarke could tell that her Mom’s attention was on Olivia “Did you unlock Grandma’s phone?....You’re not in trouble, you just have to remember that doing things without permission isn’t good...you could have asked Grandma...” Clarke smiled into the phone when she heard her daughter softly say ‘Sorry Grandma...I wanted to tell Mommy something...” Clarke couldn’t help the smile on her face thinking about her daughter wanting to talk to her so badly that she snuck into her grandparent’s room and found her Grandma’s phone unlocked it and managed to call her number. “Hang on Clarke, Olivia really wants to talk to you...”

 

“It’s ok, put her on I’ll tell her off”

 

“You don’t need to she understands...don’t you my flower” Clarke smiled at her Mom’s nickname for Olivia, she listened silently as she walked around the bedroom picking up all of her and Lexa’s clothes from the floor, she could her Mom and daughter having a quiet conversation, obviously so that her father didn’t wake up. ‘You still want to talk to Mommy?’... ‘Yes please Grandma’ ... ‘Ok, but you have to be quiet in case Grandpa wakes up’ ... ‘Ok Grandma, does Grandpa get grumpy if you wake him up?’ ... ‘He does, just a little bit grumpy, He needs all his sleep for playtime tomorrow though doesn’t he?’ ... ‘Yeah’ ‘Ok then, here you go lay back on the pillow and you can talk to Mommy....good girl’ Clarke smiled realising that Olivia must have done what her Grandma asked her too, turning her attention to the corridor walking forward and picking up the last of the clothes that had been thrown from her and Lexa’s body as they got caught in their passion early that night. Placing the clothes into the laundry basket in the far corner of the bedroom, as she did she heard a shuffle on the end of the phone before the shuffling stopped and she heard her daughter’s voice;

 

“Mommy?”

 

“Hey princess....I heard you wanted to talk to me”

 

“I did Mommy”

 

Clarke smiled at the little girl’s words as she walked towards the staircase, as she reached it she slowly walked down the stairs “What did you want to tell me Princess?” As she reached the bottom of the stairs, she noticed Lexa looking at her looking slightly confused, she just smiled at her wife, nodding her head silently confirming that she was talking to their daughter. She continued walking forward to sit back next to Lexa whilst their daughter talked down the phone;

 

“I had a dream Mommy...and I wanted to tell you about it...”

 

“Was it a good dream or a bad dream Princess?”

 

“Really good Mommy...and I woke up and wanted to tell you...but I remembered that we are with Grandma and

Grandpa...”

 

“So you decided to call me?”

 

“Yeah, I’m sorry Mommy...I really wanted to tell you”

 

“You don’t need to apologise Princess...not to me...it wasn’t my phone you took...” Clarke smiled at Lexa seeing the impressed look on her wife’s face, as she relaxed herself on the couch again, bringing her legs up onto the couch she stretched them over Lexa’s legs smiling as Lexa brought her hands up to gently rest on them. Their eyes kept on each other as Clarke listened to their daughter.

 

“I told Grandma I was sorry Mommy....Grandma said it's ok....”

 

“Ok then that’s ok....so what happened in this dream then Princess, tell me all about it?”

 

“It was the best dream every Mommy, It was my birthday and when I came downstairs me and Oscar couldn’t see Mama....but the best thing ever happened and Mama came through the door Mommy”

 

“She did...that sounds exciting”

 

“It was Mommy....but then Mama gave us presents and told us that she was coming home forever....then we played loads of games, and Mama let us win them all but she said it was because it was our birthday...then Mama took all my fries and ate them Mommy” Olivia sweetly finished letting out a small giggle as she finished explaining her dream

 

“That sounds like the best dream ever Princess”

 

“It was Mommy...because Mama came home and then we all had a family cuddle Mommy it was really really great”

 

“It sounds great....maybe it’ll come true”

 

“Really Mommy?”

 

“Yes really princess...I think Mama may even be home before your birthday...”

 

“That would be awesome Mommy”

 

Clarke laughed at the comment removing the phone from her ear she looked at Lexa smiling at her daughter's works, pressing the speaker button she smiled as she spoke to her daughter “Where did you learn that word Princess?” Clarke asked hoping her daughter would say it again knowing Lexa hadn’t heard the word.

 

“Auntie Raven taught me....she said when something is really great and better than everything else it is awesome”

 

“She’s right...” Clarke responded her and Lexa laughing knowing that was exactly something Raven would say. If there was a list of Raven’s favourite words Awesome would probably be number one on it. “Is that all that happened in your dream Princess?”

 

“Yeah....After we had cuddles in my dream I woke up...and I wanted to talk to you Mommy...”

 

“Can I ask you a question Princess?”

 

“Of course Mommy....anything in the world”

 

“How did you know what number was Mommy’s?”

 

“I remembered your name Mommy”

 

“My name?”

 

“Yeah...your name is Clarke Mommy...I remember because Mama tells us stories about Princess Clarke, and Mama said that the Princess is you Mommy” Clarke and Lexa smiled at the happiness and excitement in their daughters voice as she explained how she remembered “And I heard Mama call you Clarke Mommy...and Grandma and

Grandpa call you Clarke as well Mommy...but you’re not my Clarke you're my Mommy”

 

“I know I am Princess....can I ask another question?”

 

“Yes Mommy”

 

“Why didn’t you call Mama?”

 

“I couldn’t remember Mama’s name Mommy...”

 

“You couldn’t?”

 

“No, Mama gets called loads and lots of things Mommy...I remember Mama being called Lexa, but I couldn’t find it in Grandma’s phone....but I wanted to talk to you Mommy I promise”

 

“I know baby it’s ok...in fact it’s a good thing you called me”

 

“Why Mommy?”

 

“Because now you can talk to us both” Clarke and Lexa smiled at each other as Lexa’s left hand gently rubbed up and down Clarke’s leg as they waited for Olivia to realise her Mama was there with her Mommy

 

“Who is both Mommy?”

 

Lexa laughed at the comment, taking her opportunity she wet her lips quickly before softly speaking “Who do you think Princess?”

 

“MAMA.....” Olivia let out in excitement ‘Sorry Grandma’. They both heard her say closely followed by Abby’s voice ‘It’s ok my little flower’. “Hi Mama” Olivia softly and more quietly let out, the happiness in her voice peaking as she spoke

“Hi Princess...why are you awake so late huh?”

 

“I had a good dream Mama and I wanted to call Mommy...I couldn’t remember your name Mama...so I couldn’t call you...I’m sorry Mama”

 

“You don’t need to apologise princess it’s ok that you didn’t remember my name”

 

“What is your name Mama?”

 

“My name is Lexa”

 

“But I couldn’t find it on Grandma’s phone Mama”

 

“That’s because Lexa is my nickname...Grandma probably has me saved by my full name”

 

“What’s a nickname Mama?”

 

“A nickname is a name that everyone calls you instead of your real name”

 

“Like Princess?”

 

“Exactly like Princess.....Princess”

 

Olivia laughed at her Mama’s words her voice filling the line and making Clarke and Lexa’s hearts burst with happiness and love. “But why Mama?”

 

“Why use a nickname?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“Well sometimes a nickname suits people better than their real name, or sometimes people prefer their nicknames to their real names”

 

“Do you like your nickname more Mama?”

 

“I do Princess”

 

“Why Mama?”

 

“I don’t know baby....I just do”

 

“What’s your real name Mama?”

 

“You mean the name my Mommy gave me?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“My real name is Alexa”

 

“It’s pretty Mama...why don’t you like it?”

 

“I like it....I just prefer Lexa instead”

 

“But it’s nice Mama”

 

“I know that baby but sometimes you just like your nickname more.....how about you? What do you prefer being called, Princess or Olivia?”

 

“I like them both Mama....sometimes I like Olivia and sometimes I like Princess”

 

“That’s fair...so you like them both the same?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“Good...” Lexa looked at Clarke as they both heard a small yawn come through the line “Are you tired Princess?”

“A little bit Mama...but I don’t want to go to sleep Mama”

 

“Why not princess? If you’re tired then you should go to sleep”

 

“I know Mama but I don’t want you to go....I like talking to you...and I miss you more, don’t want to miss you

Mama...I don’t like missing you more”

 

“I know Princess but soon you’ll be able to talk to me all the time so...for now you can go to sleep” Lexa couldn’t

stand hearing the sadness in her daughter’s voice, wanting to take away all that sudden sadness that Olivia was feeling and make it disappear she couldn’t help but drop a small hint about her moving home hoping inside that her daughter would pick up on it.

 

“But I won’t be able to talk all the time Mama...so I wanna talk now”

 

“You will”

 

“How Mama?”

 

Lexa looked at Clarke her eyes asking for permission to tell their daughter what they had agreed on hours before.

Even though her and Clarke were originally going to tell the twins at the same time, this moment just seemed to perfect to miss. She guessed that Clarke was thinking the same thing as the Blonde softly nodded her head at Lexa’s silent question. “Well it’s a secret so you can’t tell anyone?”

 

“Not even Oscar Mama?”

 

“Not even Oscar....well not until Mama sees you next”

 

“But secrets are bad Mama”

 

“I know baby....ok so you have to keep it to yourself until he wakes up then you can tell him, but nobody else...and it won’t be a secret it’ll just be Woods Family information, that’s information you can only have if you’re a Woods”

 

“I’m a Woods Mama”

 

“Exactly, that’s why you can know.....so are you ready for me to tell you?”

 

“Yes Mama”

 

“Ok then.....Mama’s moving home”

 

“When Mama?”

 

“Tomorrow” Lexa was slightly worriedly as silence filled the phone line, looking at Clarke they both exchanged a worried look until they heard a small excited squeal on the other end of the phone, it was silent and low but they could both hear it “Princess?...Are you ok?”

 

“I’m really happy Mama....but I have to be quiet Grandma is sleeping”

 

“Ok then you have to be really quiet...are you ok with Mama moving back home tomorrow?”

 

“Yeah...I wanna scream really loudly but I have to be quiet Mama....can’t wake up Grandma”

 

“Your such a good girl, and I can’t wait to give you a massive cuddle and kisses”

 

“Mama kisses?”

 

“Yes loads and loads of Mama Kisses”

 

“Yay”

 

“Do you think you can go back to bed for Mama now?”

 

“Ok Mama...I’ll see you tomorrow Mama”

 

“Yes you will and every single day after that...”

 

Olivia let out a massive but silent giggle down the phone line before she softly spoke “I love you Mama....and I love you Mommy”

 

“I love you too” Clarke and Lexa responded at the same time making each other giggle softly

 

“Thank you Mama...goodnight Mommy...goodnight Mama”

 

Before either of them had a chance to say ask Olivia what she was thanking them for their daughter hung up the phone, the happy tone of her voice ringing in both of their ears as Lexa smiled at the phone thinking about Olivia’s face, picturing that smile she always loved seeing on her daughter’s face, without a word to each other Clarke lowered the phone between them leaning forward and resting her head on Lexa’s shoulder as Lexa wrapped her arms around her holding onto her wife both of them enjoying what was going to be their first night together properly in over a year.

* * *

** Nia Gardia’s House **

Across Town in a two storey house, Roan sat on his sister’s couch his mind filled with visions of what he’d seen early that night, Clarke and Lexa sitting in the cinema holding hands like there wasn’t a care in the world for them, like everything he and Clarke’s relationship meant nothing to her. His anger continued to bubble over until he found himself on his sister couch hours later, after listening to her talk about what an idiot he was and how he messed up her chances with Lexa. He’d listened on and on until he couldn’t control his anger and he’d clenched up his fist punching a hole through Nia’s coffee table that was a few moments ago and now his sister was on her knees cleaning up the mess with a shimmer of sadness glinting from her eyes. Seeing that look he knew he had to do whatever it took to protect her and make sure that she got the one thing her heart desired:

 

“I’m gonna make this right Nia”

 

“How are you gonna do that Roan….you messed everything up….all I was doing was being a good sister….everything I did was to get you the woman you told me you loved more than life….I gave her to you on a plate….she believed every single word I said to her stupid friend, we had her exactly where you needed her and you fucked up because that's what you do” Nia let out trying to control the venom and anger she was feeling from seeping into her voice.

 

“I can fix this I know I can….this is all because of the kids, she won't believe me or anything I say over Lexa because of the twins….their Clarke's world…”

 

“Then how do you plan to fix that…I'll do a lot but killing a child isn't even an option…that's insane….tell me little brother how are you going to make it so Lexa is no longer the Mama to the twins…how are you going to stop Clarke loving her that much?”

 

Nia looked at her brother watching as the wheels turned in his mind, she could see the conflict on his face before his facial expression became firm and solid without an ounce of compassion pulling his phone from his pocket he unlocked doing something on it before he smiled at something he had seemingly found, pressing a few more buttons he pressed call and held the phone to his ear as Nia watched on waiting to see what her little brother was up to, a massive smile spread across her face as he spoke:

 

“Hello Department of Family Child Services….I’d like to report two children in danger…”

 

* * *

**So What is Evil A-Hole Roan gone and done? Well it’s kind of given away with the sentence....BUT Will the DCFS listen to anything he has to say? Who knows only time will tell....So what does everyone think?....No spoilers at the moment because I wanna keep the suspense going lol....anywho as always please feel free to leave a review on this chapter or to personally inbox me if you prefer...and until next time peeps and peepettes Stay Safe and Keep Fanficing** **J**


	23. Complaint Made

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa navigate being back together...along with some more Clexa Sexy time :-) Plus some Woods Family time :-)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: OK So completely unrelated to the story lol I watched the whole series of Orange Is The New Black and have to say wasn’t that hooked until the last five episodes...and then I was liek WTF THAT ENDING ...then obviously realised that I had to wait another year to watch the next series...MAJOR SADNESS FELT LOL....Also Any Prettty Litle Liars Fans....HOLY BAT SHIT....How insane are the episodes getting...So many unanswered questions such little time....BUT THOSE EMISON SCENES....YAAAAAYYYYYY....LOL Anyways I just wanted to share my excitement with everyone at those two shows, I wont go into the other shows I love because I’d be here too long lol Anyways I apologise and I will leave you all to the chapter below 
> 
> BUT Aaaaaannnnnnnnyyyyyywaaaayyyyy, lol, with my mini rant out the way I just wanna say THANK YOU to everyone that has left a comment or left Kudos :-) I appreciate you all taking the time to read this story and you have no idea how much it means or how much it helps me keep writing :-) So Yeah A MASSIVE THANK YOU TO EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU...So this chapter is about 12,500 words long, I hope you all enjoy it...
> 
> OH Before I forget...Thank You to Pheonixdjones for writing the sex scene (Which is AWESOME lol) and for editing some of this chapter...she is awesome and it is greatly appreciated that she wants to help me :-) (She's so Cool)....

** Chapter 23-Complaint Made **

** Sunday 26th March 2017-09:07am **

Clarke woke up in the same shorts and t-shirt she’d worn to bed, her head resting on a strong arm she knew to be Lexa's, she could feel Lexa's other arm wrapped firmly and tightly around her waist holding them together. After talking to Olivia on the phone to two women had decided to go to bed, they both climbed into bed staying dressed in the t-shirt and shorts they had both been wearing, wrapping themselves in each other before they quickly fell asleep in each other’s arms, both exhausted from the seven love making sessions they had engaged in for hours on end that night. She smiled at the feeling ignoring the slight tiredness she was feeling for a Saturday morning, especially since the twins weren't there to wake up, squinting her eyes slightly she looked at the clock on the bedside cabinet seeing it was just after 9am, she smiled softly as she thought about how this had to be the latest she'd slept on a Saturday in the last year, normally the twins woke her up for cuddles or breakfast at 7am she was up by 7:30am the latest sometimes 8am if Olivia was feeling a little sadder than normal. Or whenever one of the twins was missing their Mama so much they wanted to see pictures on Clarke’s phone. All those thoughts and memories from the last year rushed through her mind, they seemed so fresh in her mind yet they seemed so long ago at the same time. She was brought out of her thought when she felt Lexa stretch slightly behind her before she felt a soft kiss being placed on her shoulder. Smiling brightly at the feeling she half turned herself around, her eyes fell on her Lexa making her smile up at the brunette, leaning up gently she kissed Lexa once before half turning back. Her attention turning to the cabinet near her, her eyes concentrating on the picture of Lexa sleeping on the couch with Olivia on one side of her chest and Oscar in the other, Lexa’s arms holding on strongly to the twins. Relaxing herself into Lexa more she heard Lexa’s voice;

 

“You know for a minute or so I thought last night was a dream”

 

“Me too”

 

“Well I’m glad it isn’t...” Lexa sweetly responded placing another kiss on Clarke’s shoulder as she took in the smell of the blonde as well as the moment they were sharing. “What’s the plan for today then?”

 

“Well at some point we should expect the twins...there’s no way once Olivia tells Oscar that he’s gonna stay calm...” She felt Lexa’s body shake softly in laughter against her back “Maybe we can go get your stuff from your apartment.....If you want...”

 

“You still think this is a dream huh?”

 

“Mmmmm.....maybe a little bit...” Clarke turned herself fully around so her and Lexa were face to face. Bringing her right hand to gently trace its way up Lexa’s left arm, before bringing it to trace backwards and forwards along Lexa’s collarbone, her vision on Lexa’s skin and her hand. “I just want you back home....until your stuff is messily thrown all over the place I don’t think it’ll feel real”

 

“So laying in bed with me after seven love making sessions last night, you’re still not convinced it’s real”

 

“Well maybe that part is REALLY real to me....but the other stuff...I just want you to be home and to have all your stuff annoyingly in my space...just like we used to...I wanna wake up and have a mini battle with you about who should get ready first just like we always used to...”

 

“Firstly, my stuff is never in your space...your stuff is in my space...Secondly, I always win those battles so don’t get too excited...and Thirdly, this is real I promise....but we can get dressed, have some breakfast then we can go to Raven’s apartment and we can pack everything I need and be back here before the afternoon....ok?” Clarke nodded her head at Lexa’s words smiling goofily leaning forward pressing herself against Lexa, connecting their lips gently together in a loving kiss. As she pulled back, an idea flashed in her mind as she looked up at her wife, smiling she grabbed Lexa’s hand pulling gently on it as Lexa asked “Where are we going?”

 

“I got an idea.....just keep quiet and come with me” Clarke smirked as she dragged Lexa out of their bed, laughing softly at how cute Lexa looked with her Heda Twin Records t-shirt all crumpled up and pressed against her skin, from where she’d been laying on whilst sleeping, she smiled as she noticed Lexa pull at her shorts pulling them, detaching them from where they were pressed against her skin. She continued to pull on Lexa’s hand, guiding her wife into the bathroom suite in their bedroom. Clarke stopped in front of the mirror turning and looking at Lexa, she the small smirk on Lexa’s face, and seeing Lexa’s attention was on the bath tub. “We’re not in here for that...” She laughed softly when Lexa’s face filled with disappointment, leaning forward she softly pecked Lexa on the lips before she turned to face the mirror;

 

“So what are we in here for?”

 

“We are in here to start the process of you moving back in”

 

“Ok....I’m lost....How do we start the process in our bathroom”

 

“By doing this...” Clarke started before dropping Lexa’s hand moving forward she knelt down in front of the cabinet opening the doors and looking inside it as Lexa watched on. She watched as Clarke reached forward into the cabinet, within seconds Clarke pulled her hand back removing it from the cabinet she revealed some of Lexa’s hair products, standing up she leant against the counter space in front of the mirror, began placing the products on the counter where they used to sit months ago before she removed them, at the time not wanting any reminders of Lexa in the bathroom when she was getting ready. Placing the last item in her hand on the counter she knelt down again, stopping she looked back at Lexa softly saying “You can help me you know”

 

“Oh I know I can....but the view I have where I am is better than it would be if I was bending down”

 

“Your a horn dog”

 

“I know I am...but you love it” Clarke ignored the comment turning her attention back to replacing all of Lexa’s items on the counter. “See I knew it...” Lexa softly responded laughing a little to herself, a few minutes later Clarke stood up having finished placing all of Lexa’s products on the counter space. Closing the cabinet doors she turned around leaning on it, almost seductively looking at Lexa she softly bit her bottom lip as she looked at her;

 

“See back where they belong....”

 

Lexa smirked at the look Clarke gave her, she knew that look and she loved it. She loved the feeling that it gave her in the pit of her stomach, almost like a spark that within a second would ignite into a fire. Stepping forward she placed either of her hands either of Clarke’s hips, placing her hands on the counter as she leant into Clarke kissing her once. As their lips connected Clarke brought her hands to rest on either side of Lexa’s neck, using her hands to pull Lexa closer to her until their chests were pressed together. They kissed for a few seconds before Lexa pulled back, removing her hands from the counter she placed them on Clarke’s hips gripping gently onto the waistband of Clarke’s shorts stepping back creating more space between them, she pulled the Blonde from the bathroom leading her to the bed, spinning their positions she closed the space between them. As their chests pressed together Lexa kissed Clarke once as they began walking back together, moving perfectly in sync with each other. As the back of Clarke’s knees hit the bed, Lexa gently moved her right hand to Clarkes’s stomach, pulling out of the kiss she gently pushed the blonde backwards until she was laying on the bed.

 

“We better get ready if we wanna leave”

 

The smirk on Lexa’s face told Clarke everything she needed to know “Your so cruel....and such a tease”

 

“And I’m the horn dog huh?”

 

“You are....that was mean Lex...”

 

“Sure it was....come on get ready we’ve got moving to do” Lexa let out as she turned walking out of the bedroom and towards the guest room, knowing some of her clothes were in there. Once she entered the Guest room she grabbed a pair of jeans and a plain t-shirt along with some Calvin Klein underwear, once she had everything she needed except for a clean bra, she entered the bathroom jumping into the shower whilst Clarke had a bath in their bathroom suite. Once she was finished showering and dressed, she carefully tied her hair into her signature braid, before she exited the bathroom and walking to her and Clarke’s bedroom, not seeing the Blonde anywhere she placed her dirty clothing and items into the laundry basket in the very corner of the room before she turned around going and checking every room upstairs finding nothing. Going downstairs she walked through the living room, before entering the kitchen and finding Clarke in the kitchen dancing along to the radio, she was wearing skinny dark denim jeans with a skinny fit white t-shirt, her hair still wet from her shower/bath, as she cooked at the stove. It only took Lexa a few second to work out the Clarke was cooking Pancakes, smiling at the Blonde she coughed softly before walking to the kettle, she smiled when she noticed a coffee already made and waiting for her in front of the kettle;

 

“I thought a coffee would be better than a Herbal tea....especially after last night”

 

“You’re right....I need some caffeine...pure unadulterated caffeine...” Lexa smiled out walking over to Clarke, standing behind her she placed a single kiss on the back of Clarke’s neck before leaning into the Blonde and kissing her on the cheek once before turning and walking towards the table, picking up her cup of coffee as she made her way there. “You want any help?” She asked as she sat down in her chair, instantly thinking to herself she should have asked when she was stood behind her wife.

 

“No I’m fine...It’ll be ready in a minute...”

 

“Ok if you’re sure” Lexa smirked as the doorbell rang out through the house, looking at the clock on the wall Lexa noticed the time was now 09:52am. She wasn’t sure who would be calling at Clarke’s at this time in the morning. She smiled as she looked at Clarke waiting for the blonde to speak;

 

“You can make yourself useful and answer the door please.....sugar”

 

“Sugar huh?” Lexa asked raising her eyebrow at the Blonde as she stood up and walking towards the Living room “I’ll be getting some of that after my breakfast” She noticed the smile and small laugh that came from Clarke as she turned and walked towards the front door, unlatching and unlocking the door she turned the handle pulling the door towards her. As the door opened her eyes fell on Abby and Jake standing on the doorstep, massive smiles on their faces as they looked at Lexa, she didn’t have time to question their smiles as Olivia came bursting through her grandparents rushing at her Mama, closely followed by Oscar both of them loudly exclaiming:

 

“MAMA”

 

The sound smiled at the twins as they ran forward crashing into her legs, Olivia on her left and Oscar on her right. Leaning down she wrapped her arms around her children “Hi my little Prince and Princess”. As she looked down at them both Oscar looked up at his Mama and softly asked:

 

“Is it true Mama?”

 

“Is what true my prince?”

 

“Livy said your coming home Mama…..forever and ever”

 

“When did Olivia tell you that?”

 

“This morning Mama….I woke up and Livy was sitting on the floor and she was smiling loads and lots, and when I sat up she told me Mama…”

 

Lexa's smiled softly looking at Olivia she softly said “Good girl princess…waiting was good” Olivia smiled at the praise from her Mama, not letting go of her grip on her Mama’s thigh. Turning her attention back to Oscar, Lexa smiled at him bringing her right hand to gently run through his hair as he looked up at her patiently waiting for her to answer “It is true….I’m moving back home today…” She couldn't help the smile that escaped and spread across her face as Oscar let out a gasp and a massive yell of:

 

“YES” He looked up at her with so much happiness on his face it looked like he was ready to explode, letting go of his Mama’s thigh he began running around the room in excitement, running around and around the coffee table.

 

Having heard the yell of happiness Clarke came walking into the room seeing her son running circles around the coffee table she quickly realised he must have be told about his Mama moving home by his twin. As soon as he noticed her in the room, Oscar stopped on the spot letting out a small giggle before he took off running towards his Mommy not stopping until she scooped him up in her arms lifting him into her chest “Hi Mommy” He happily let out, leaning forward and kissing her on the lips.

 

“Good Morning my Handsome Prince….so did Olivia tell you the big news?”

 

“I think so Mommy, She told me that Mama’s coming home and Mama said it's true Mommy”

 

“It is….me and Mama spoke last night and we decided that Mama was going to come home from today….isn't that great news?”

 

“It's the best Mommy….” Oscar looked at his Mommy remembering what he'd wished for one night he curiously asked her “Do I still get presents on my birthday Mommy?”

 

“Of course you do, why wouldn't you?”

 

“Because I wished for Mama to be home forever”

 

“Well Mama coming home wasn't because of a wish, it was because she loves so a million billion trillion stars and she misses being at home….and she misses you so much that now she has to come home because it's too much”

 

“Mama’s coming home because she loves me and Livy a million trillion percent?”

 

“Exactly….not because you wished….though maybe that helped a little as well….But either way you still get loads of presents for your birthday”

 

“That's brilliant Mommy” Oscar excitedly and visually let out looking at his Mommy with a massive smile

 

“Let me guess….Auntie Raven taught you that word?”

 

“Yeah…and Awesome….Auntie Raven said she's more awesome than Mama”

 

“Oh she did huh? Do you think she's right?”

 

“No, Mama is the most Brilliant Awesome Mama in the whole wide world”

 

“And Mommy is the Most Brilliant Awesome Mommy in the whole world too” Olivia sweetly interjecting from her place against her Mama’s thigh

 

“Yeah Mommy….what Livy said…you and Mama are the most Brilliant Awesome Mommies in the whole wide world”

 

“Thank you my prince….well you and Olivia are the most Brilliant Awesome Twins in the whole world”

 

“Even more than Mama and Auntie Raven?”

 

“To me….yes”

 

“YAY” Oscar let out as he hugged his Mommy tightly holding onto her for dear life. “Mommy, can I have some breakfast?”

 

“Hey Munchkin….you already had breakfast” Jake interjected as he and Abby walked into the living room having been caught up in watching the family interact. As they closed the door behind them Oscar wriggled from his Mommy’s arms running over to his Grandpa who happily lifted him of the floor onto his chest.

 

“I think he's just like his Grandpa….And his Mommy” Abby smiled kissing her husband on the cheek before kissing Oscar on the cheek as well

 

“What does that mean Grandma?”

 

“It means you can eat loads and loads of food and still be hungry just like Grandpa and Mommy do” Abby watched as her grandson laughed loudly at her sentence “Come on let's get some more food….I think I can smell Pancakes”

 

“I love Pancakes” Oscar excitedly let out wriggling in his Grandpas arms. Jake and Abby laughed at their grandson as Jake placed Oscar on the floor and watched him run excitedly to the kitchen, not even a second later he came running back into the living room running to his grandparents and grabbing both of them by the hand pulling them towards the kitchen “Come on Grandma and Grandpa, there are loads of Pancakes to eat” letting out another excited giggle Oscar ran forward as his Grandparents let him pull them into the kitchen leaving Clarke and Lexa alone in the living room with Olivia.

 

“You ok Princess?” Clarke asked softly seeing Olivia was still wrapped around Lexa’s leg. The two women exchanged an unsure look before Clarke moved forward stopping near Lexa just as Olivia lifted her head from against her Mama’s thigh nodding softly at her Mommy “Are you sure baby girl?” She asked not sure if Olivia as upset, she couldn't see any tears but she knew sometimes Olivia could hide when she was upset about something or if she thought she'd get in trouble for being upset. Kneeling down so she was level with Olivia she looked at her daughter smiling as Olivia slowly removed herself from her Mama’s leg, looking to her Mommy she softly spoke;

 

“I’m really happy Mommy”

 

“You are?” Olivia nodded at her Mommy “Then why are you hiding your face so much?”

 

“Because I’m too happy Mommy”

 

“Too happy...I’m not sure that’s a real thing Princess”

 

“It is Mommy...I was really really really really happy in my dream, but that was because it was dream Mommy”

 

“Okkkkaaaayyyy...and that means” Clarke slowly spoke, seeing Lexa laugh in the corner of her eye at the confusion that must have obviously been filling her face at their daughter’s cryptic sentence

 

“I can’t be too happy Mommy because then it would be a dream and I don’t want it to be a dream”

 

“Well I promise you that it isn’t a dream....no matter how happy you are, this isn’t a dream I promise you”

 

“It’s real Mommy?”

 

“It’s really real Princess” Clarke looked seriously at her daughter watching as Olivia let out a small laugh as she looked at her Mommy

 

“That’s funny Mommy”

 

“Oh it is, is it?” Clarke asked slightly amused at the giggle coming from her daughter. When Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy, Clarke looked up at Lexa seeing a small smile on Lexa’s face as she giggled along with their daughter. Smiling at the scene in front of her, Clarke laughed herself before reaching forward grabbing hold of her daughter and beginning to tickle her, the action caused Olivia to drop to her knees lying herself on the floor as she tried to escape her Mommy’s tickling “The tickle monster doesn’t think it’s funny” Clarke let out as Lexa moved away from the two and towards the kitchen making sure she didn’t get caught in all the tickling. Clarke continued to tickle he daughter, she loved hearing the sound of Olivia’s laugh especially when she was being tickled it as like her laugh would just give off happiness, it was so infectious and pure it always made Clarke feel better about life no matter what was going on.

 

As Olivia wriggled around on the floor under her Mommy’s hands, trying her best to escape she giggle out “No Mommy...stop...” But Clarke didn’t, she kept tickling the little girl making her laugh more and more with every movement of her hands “I give Mommy....I give up....” Clarke listened as the laugh in her daughter’s chest continued to erupt, the mini dirty laugh she loved hearing creeping into Olivia’s voice as she laughed on. After ten minutes or so Clarke decided to let her daughter escape bringing her hands up in the air making out she was going to dive back onto her daughter, she laughed herself when Olivia quickly jumped up looking at her, her face red from laughter as she continued to laugh running towards the kitchen “MAMA.....QUICK SAVE ME...” She yelled as Clarke got up and ran after her and into the kitchen.

 

As Clarke walked into the kitchen she saw Olivia hiding behind her Mama’s legs, in the space between Lexa’s legs and the base of the counter as Lexa lent against it, as she saw her Mommy Olivia let out a dirty giggle holding onto her Mama even tighter. Looking around Clarke noticed her dad and Oscar sitting at the table, Oscar was sat on her dad’s lap as they shared a plate of pancakes, she noticed her Mom was sat opposite them a cup of what she guessed was coffee next to her. Turning her attention back to Olivia she leant down eyeing her daughter playfully “Nobody can save you not even Mama” She let out making Olivia giggle and move back slightly, as she stepped forward Olivia quickly ran from behind her Mama’s legs quickly running towards the table “GRANDMA SAVE ME” She yelled, a second later she was jumping into her Grandma’s open arms making Clarke stop in her tracks as Abby wrapped her arms around her granddaughter

 

“No fair, you went to Grandma for protection”

 

“That’s what Grandma does Mommy”

 

“Oh is it?”

 

“Yeah....Grandma protects me and makes me safe and better” Olivia proudly explained looking up at her Grandma “Right Grandma?”

 

“Exactly right....Grandma’s job it’s to protect you and keep you safe especially from the tickle monster” Abby responded sweetly, Olivia leant forward hugging her Grandma tightly for a second before pulling back and looking up at her Grandma and saying;

 

“That’s Mommy and Mama’s job too Grandma”

 

“I know it is....just when me and Grandpa keep you safe and protect you...you get more sweets” Olivia laughed at her Grandma leaning her head forward and against her Grandma’s chest

 

“Not too many sweets I hope” Clarke added smiling at the scene in front of her before turning and going about making herself and Lexa a plate of pancakes and a fresh coffee each.

 

“We couldn’t possibly say could we flower...that’s a secret only we can know”

 

“Yeah...it’s a Grandma secret...and can’t possby tell you Mommy” Olivia added laughing against her Grandma

 

“Mmmm....Ok...but Mommy will find out...I always find out” Clarke responded as she turned around with two cups of coffee walking over to Lexa and handing one to her, Lexa smiled at her accepting the coffee. Placing the other cup on the counter next to Lexa, Clarke turned around grabbing the plate of pancakes she’d just quickly prepared she carried it over to where Lexa was leant against the counter placing it in front of Lexa, she smiled when Lexa wrapped her right arm around her waist holding her close against her chest, as she used her left hand to drink the coffee Clarke had just gave her. As she grabbed a pancake and began eating it breaking of a piece at a time, looking at her daughter she softly asked “Did you have fun last night at Grandmas?” She knew her son wasn’t going to answer so kept her attention on Olivia.

 

“Yeah, Grandma played Princesses with me. And Grandma helped me with the 4 times table...then we watched my little pony...”

 

“That sounds like so much fun Princess”

 

“It was Mommy....the most fun ever Mommy...Grandma is good at playing princesses”

 

“I know she is...Grandma used to play Princesses with me all the time when I was little” Clarke looked at her daughter smiling at the happiness that seemed to be beaming from her daughter’s face. She watched as Olivia looked to her brother seeing him eating with their Grandpa “You hungry Princess?”

 

“A little bit Mommy”

 

“Here baby...” Clarke softly responded holding a whole pancake out for her daughter, Olivia looked at her cautiously “No more tickling...I promise...well not until later...” Olivia laughed softly at her Mommy before looking to her Grandma for confirmation, when her Grandma nodded her head softly Olivia jumped down from her Grandma’s lap quickly walking forward and stopping in front of her Mommy, Clarke handed the pancake to her daughter seeing the smile grace her face as she took it;

 

“Thank you Mommy”

 

“You’re welcome baby” When Olivia didn’t move or attempt to eat the pancake, Clarke curiously asked “What’s wrong Princess?” Olivia didn’t answer instead she moved forward pulling on her Mommy’s jeans until she leant down “What’s wrong baby?” Clarke asked leaning down until the side of her face was next to Olivia’s, as Olivia turned into her she smiled a little at her Mommy rubbing her eye with her free hand. Suddenly knowing what was on Olivia’s mind Clarke whispered into her daughter’s ear “It’s real life and not a dream Princess...I promise you” At her Mommy’s word Olivia smiled brightly before leaning into her Mommy hugging her with her free hand, as she pulled away she leant up pursing her lips, Clarke smiled pecking her daughter on the lips quickly before softly saying “Now go eat that pancake before I eat myself” Olivia giggled turning and running back over to her Grandma, allowing Clarke to turn her attention back to her wife. Turning around she looked at the brunette seeing she’d just finished her coffee and was just finishing eating a pancake “Are you in a rush?” She asked in amusement.

 

“No...I just thought that now you have company, I can go get my things from the apartment” Lexa explained leaning forward and gently kissing Clarke on the cheek

 

“I don’t know if you’re going to be able to escape”

 

“From the twins or from you?”

 

“Me of course...” Clarke laughed out as Lexa laughed with her nodding her head before she leant forward capturing Clarke’s lips gently with her own. As Lexa pulled back Clarke looked up at her smirking “You’re definitely not getting away now”

 

Lexa smirked at the comment wrapping her arms around Clarke’s waist and pulling her closer , she kissed her once on the lips before softly saying “Well the sooner I leave the sooner I can come back”

 

“Damn you make a good argument”

 

“I know I do” Lexa laughed out before removing her arms, now noticing that Abby and Jake were watching her and Clarke’s every move. Feeling her cheeks redden slightly she stepped back picking up her cup and carrying it over to the sink, gently placing it in the sink she walked back seeing her in-laws eyes were still firmly focused on her “Um, sorry about that”

 

“It’s fine...it’s nice to see two back to normal....we’re happy for you both” Jake genuinely said looking over at the women as Abby nodded her head in agreement, smiling brightly at them as he returned to his pancakes.

 

“Thanks” Lexa responded, she was silently glad that Jake and Abby approved of her and Clarke’s reunion. Their approval meant the world to her, more than her own parents if she was honest. Turning her attention back to Clarke she stopped in front of her leaning forward pecking her on the lips once. “I won’t be long I promise...and I’ll make it up to you later” Clarke leant forward at Lexa’s words leaning against her wife a little as she connected their lips, she didn’t know why but she couldn’t seem to control herself around Lexa at the moment, maybe it was the year apart or maybe it wasn’t but either way she couldn’t stop the constant wanting inside her. As their lips connected that same spark she felt the night before rushed through her body, when the kiss deepened a little Lexa pulled back not wanting to get too heated with the kids in the same room. Looking at Clarke she smirked at the Blonde before removing herself from Clarke completely and walking to the door of the kitchen turning back and looking at the twins she softly speaking hoping to get good reactions in light of the twins’ good moods “Mama’s going out for a bit...I’ll be back soon” Lexa was slightly surprised when Olivia didn’t move from her spot on her Grandma’s lap. Instead she looked at her Mama and softly asked;

 

“Where are you going Mama?”

 

“I’ve got to go get all my things from Auntie Raven’s”

 

Lexa was again surprised when Olivia didn’t get upset; she just sat with her Grandma happily smiling at her Mama. Lexa didn’t have much time to think about how calm Olivia was as Oscar’s voice filled the room and he jumped from his Grandpa’s lap, running as fast as he could to his Mama as he yelled “NO MAMA” As Oscar ran at her until he hit her legs, his small arms wrapping tightly around his Mama’s legs. His grip was so tight they restricted Lexa’s movements almost making her lose her balance for a second. “DON’T GO MAMA”

 

“Hey hey my prince...What’s all this about huh?” Lexa asked, leaning down and literally pulling her son from her legs and lifting him into the air and onto her chest. As soon as his Mama lifted him up, Oscar clung onto her neck holding onto her for dear life, as if when he let go she’d disappear and never come back. “What’s wrong?” Lexa asked soothingly rubbing the back of his head with her left hand, as she held him up with her right arm.

 

“Want you to stay Mama”

 

“I know baby, and I am...I just have to go and see Auntie Rae so I can get all my clothes”

 

“NO”

 

“Hey don’t you raise your voice to me Oscar....you hear me?”

 

“Don’t go Mama”

 

“I’m coming back, but I can’t stay forever if I don’t go get all my things”

 

“Get new things”

 

“But I like all my things” Lexa could feel Oscar beginning to shake into her embrace, she was slightly confused as she didn’t know why he was so upset, and she needed to know...what if something was really wrong with him “Tell me what’s wrong Oz? No more brave face”

 

Oscar sniffed slightly into his Mama’s neck before he softly spoke not lifting his head from his Mama’s neck and shoulder “Bad dreams happen when you go”

 

“You’ve been having bad dreams?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama, seeing the action Clarke went to walk forward but stopped seeing Lexa was dealing with the situation and also knowing that Oscar was more likely to talk to his Mama than anyone else “Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

 

“I was scared Mama”

 

“And in these Bad dreams, does Mama disappear forever....like in Olivia’s dreams?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama’s question. Feeling the nod, Lexa decided not to push Oscar but instead to try something else to get him to calm down “What will make you feel better?” Oscar shrugged her shoulders at his Mama, still not lifting his head from his Mama’s shoulders “Mmmm what to do? What to do?...how about sweets?....Nope Mommy wouldn’t be very happy with me....How about loads of cuddles?...No I don’t think that’s do it......Oh I’ve got it....How about you come with me?” That did the trick as Oscar’s head popped up and he looked at his Mama, his face a little red from pressing it into his Mama’s shoulder and neck.

 

“Can I Mama?”

 

“As long as Mommy says it’s ok”

 

“Can I Mommy, please?” Oscar asked turning and looking at his Mommy with an insane amount of hope on his face

 

“Of course you can”

 

“Thank you Mommy” Oscar excitedly let out turning back to face his Mama as she continued to hold him in her arms “Can we go Mama?”

 

“Ok then....” Lexa paused seeing Olivia watching her and Oscar “You wanna come as well Livy?”

 

“No Mama....I wanna stay with Grandma and Grandpa...and Mommy”

 

“Ok Princess....I bet your gonna have loads of fun”

 

“I will Mama....but be quick Mama, then we can play Princesses”

 

“Ok Princess....” Lexa responded internally bursting with pride and happiness at Olivia’s happiness and non clinginess, she was usually attached to her whenever she tried to leave but now she seemed fine, she was happy and calm even though her Mama was leaving, it was just like she used to be before Lexa moved out. Looking to her son and the now massive smile on his face she smiled back at him “Come on then my prince, let’s go get all my stuff so I can move back home yeah?”

 

“YEAH” Oscar excitedly let out waving to everyone as his Mama did the same, turning them around and walking towards the front door grabbing her jacket from where it was hanging near the door, then opening the door carefully reaching into her jacket pocket finding her car keys. Closing the door behind herself she carried her son to the car, internally excited to spend some time with him. As she strapped him into his car seat she laughed softly as Oscar began talking about seeing his Auntie Rae and all the things he wanted to tell her.

* * *

** Later that night **

Clarke quietly closed the door to the twin’s bedroom, Lexa was standing behind her both of them had spent the last two hours calming the twin’s down enough to get them to sleep. Lexa and Oscar had gone to, what was now being called Raven’s apartment, once they had got there Oscar had quickly ran off and begun playing with his little cousin occupying him whilst his Mama and Auntie began packing away anything vital that Lexa would need. She decided to leave a few of her clothes at the apartment in case she stayed over unexpectedly for any reason. Along with a few other small items that she didn’t really need, after about an hour of looking through and packing her and Raven had finished and returned to the living room finding Oscar still happily and carefully playing with Zachary. Raven and Lexa sat and watched as their respective sons played with a whole bunch of Zachary’s toy cars and dinosaurs, making their own stories and scenarios as they played together. Raven and Lexa talked amongst themselves until Oscar came walking over to his Mama asking when they were going home. Lexa knew he was more than likely questioning whether or not she was actually moving back home. Deciding that going home then was the best option she told her son to get his shoes on and they could go, Oscar quickly did so and thirty minutes later they were back at home with an excited Oscar helping his Mama carry the bag upstairs and then helping her unpack most of it. Once the bag was empty bar a few items of clothing, Oscar pulled his Mama by the hand downstairs and into the kitchen and then out into the garden where his Mommy, Grandpa, Grandma and twin sister were now sitting drinking lemonade and water amongst them. Oscar and his Mama rejoined them as soon as he saw his Mama sit down next his Mommy, Oscar ran over to his sister telling her all about his trip to their Auntie Raven’s apartment and how he played cars and dinosaurs with Zachary.

 

The hours passed by and soon enough Clarke and Lexa where saying goodbye to Jake and Abby, hugging them both goodbye before closing the door and returning to the twins. They decided to order some food instead of trying to decide what they could cook with the food they had in the fridge, plus they only brought takeaway on special occasions and if tonight wasn’t a special occasion then she didn’t know what was. Once they’d ordered and received the food, they all sat at the table and began eating as the twins started talking amongst themselves occasionally laughing and asking either Clarke or Lexa something about whatever they were talking about. Once all the food was finished and everyone was finished they settled down for what used to be their traditional Sunday Movie night. As usual Clarke and Lexa let the twins pick the movie, they both decided on Zootropolis, as the film started to play Olivia jumped onto her Mama’s lap curling into her chest as Oscar jumped on his Mommy’s lap curling into her chest both of them concentrating on the film, as Clarke and Lexa reached their free arm across the small space in between them on the couch, holding onto each other's hands and interlocking their fingers making it easier for them to rest and relax their hands and arms.

 

Just over an hour later Olivia and Oscar were still wide awake neither wanting to go asleep incase their Mama coming home was a dream. After some convincing they both got in the bath playing with their toys for a little bit whilst their Mommie’s watched them closely, after letting the twins mess around and play for a little while, both women helped either twin wash properly, Clarke taking Olivia and Lexa taking Oscar, once they were all washed Lexa and Clarke removed their respective twin from bath wrapped in a towel carrying them to their bedroom where they got them dried and changed into their hoses pyjamas. After the twins were dressed they both got into bed surprisingly without any arguments to their Mommie’s, staying with their respective twins Clarke and Lexa both laid down next to them, before Lexa began telling a story so both twins could hear what she was saying. Thirty Minutes later Oscar and Olivia were both fast asleep their small hands gripping onto their Mama and Mommy as their breathing stayed slow and steady. They stayed like that for a few more moments until they removed themselves from the twins and quietly stood up tip toeing to the bedroom door, that was still slightly ajar, walking through the door as quiet as possible

 

As they shut the door to the twin’s bedroom, Clarke let out a small and silent sigh of relief, today had been a long day and she was thankful that it hadn't ended in a temper tantrum from the twins, as her mind ran through the day’s events Lexa grabbed her hand and led them straight to their room, closing their door quietly behind them, Lexa pulled Clarke over to the bed both of them climbing onto the bed, Lexa’s arms wrapping around Clarke and holding her close.

 

After such a long day all Lexa wanted was to be in bed with her wife holding her close making sure this wasn't some really long nightmare she was having. To be cuddled up, wrapped in her beautiful wife's arms was something she’d been thinking and dreaming about for nearly a year. As they both fell straight into bed they naturally fell onto their sides of the bed, Lexa laying on her left side Clarke on her right, facing each other while blissfully smiling.

 

They both remained silent for a while taking on every part of their wife that they could without removing clothing. As the thought of their love making from the night before ran through her mind Lexa was the one who spoke first:

 

“ You are so beautiful. And You have no idea how good it feels to be back home, permanently. Just knowing I'm back where I belong with my kids aaaannnnnd my beautiful, sexy, smart wife of course” Lexa smiled and took Clarke’s hand in hers and brought it to her mouth to press a loving kiss to each of her knuckles. Clarke smiled a toothy grin, Cheeks turning red from the blush.

 

“You do know you don’t have to woo me anymore, you already have me and you have had me for the last eight years.”

 

Lexa smiled brightly and giggled “I’m not trying to woo you. I am just being honest, but it is nice to know that you think I still CAN woo you.”

 

As she looked at Lexa, Clarke felt a massive rush of fire run through her body, seeing the lust rise in Lexa's eyes she reached forward and grabbed Lexa by the shirt pulling her into what was suppose to just be a small loving kiss. But as always nothing between them was small. As the kiss built between them Clarke quickly threw her leg over Lexa’s until she was straddling Lexa’s hips, instantly feeling the heat between her legs and the heat coming from Lexa. Leaning up slightly Lexa took Clarke’s bottom lip into her mouth sucking it gently, catching a very loud moan from Clarke’s mouth. As Clarke kissed Lexa back, her wife kept gently sucking until minutes past and She finally let it go with a loud pop and instantly went to Clarke’s neck. She didn't have much chance to smirk or take pleasure in Clarke’s sexual need as Clarke leant down reconnecting their lips kissing Lexa passionately as the rush of passion that had exploded from Lexa’s sucking her of her lip continued to bubble. Lexa allowed Clarke to kiss her for a second or two before pulling away and flipping them over, trailing kisses down Clarke's neck eliciting a moan from her wife moving down until she was at Clarke’s pulse point, Sucking and nipping to her pulse point where she stopped to show some much needed attention. She spent minutes sucking and nipping at Clarke's pulse point until she’d left a very nice size red mark behind, a satisfied Lexa worked her way down to Clarke’s chest, taking a nipple into her mouth over the shirt, gently biting with teeth so her beautiful wife can feel her warm, wet mouth. Clarke ached for more, she moaned eagerly as she naturally moved her hands into Lexa’s hair using it to pull her closer. Turning the brunette on even more, if that were even possible, Lexa started grinding her hips into her lover, seeking friction. She let go of Clarke's nipple leaving a wet patch and started pulling Clarke's shirt up and off over her head. Clarke didn't miss a beat, she leaned up just enough to allow Lexa access to remove the offending garment that blocked her Lexa from being able to touch her every part of her chest properly.

 

‘Fuck yeah’ Clarke thought ‘My Lexa’s back’ It felt so good to be able to think like that again, and with that thought alone it made Clarke want her wife even more. So Just because she could because she FINALLY could, Clarke took hold of Lexa's shirt gripping hold of the material in her fists using it to pull Lexa flush against her chest, after a second used her fist full of material pulling and lifting it over her head throwing it hard behind her, ignoring the now long gone shirt, reaching around she unclasped Lexa’s bra pulling it quickly down Lexa’s arms throwing it behind her again ignoring it so she could truly appreciate Lexa in her naked form. Placing a firm hand on Lexa’s chest Clarke pushed her backwards until Lexa was lying down her breathing slowing down slightly at the sear passion that was rushing through her, as she looked down at her wife that passion only topped every expectation she had as it again rose more and more, unable to wait any longer she leant down and took Lexa’s already hard nipple into her mouth, sucking and nibbling her sensitive breasts. She didn't have long to enjoy the feeling of Lexa’s breast in her mouth as the brunette took both of Clarke's hands and threw them over Clarke's head to the headboard, instantly he Blonde gripped onto the headboard tightly

 

“Tonight It's my turn to worship you my love, but there are rules….no touching until I say so….And If you move…I’ll stop. Understand?” Clarks breathing became increasingly faster, no matter how hard she tried to slow it down. She hadn't seen this side of Lexa in so long. She couldn't form any words so she just nodded her head, gently biting down on her lip for a second. “Good….let’s start then” Lexa said with a wickedly sexy grin, a smile that on its own made Clarke want to explode with desire. Lexa leant down keeping her eyes locked with Clarke’s until the last second when she dipped her head and started to place soft open mouth kisses all down Clarke's neck down to her chest stopping just to show a tad more attention to Clarke's ample breasts the same breasts that she loved so much. Not wanting to waste anymore time as she was CRAVING to taste her wife, she began her downward path kissing every tiny stretch mark on her stomach. Loving every piece of what shows her what Clarke gave her. The best thing Clarke could give her other than herself. It sent a jolt down between her legs ‘How many times has Clarke given herself to me….time and time again, without nothing but love in mind’ Lexa thought. They’d been apart for a year and hadn't made love for longing than that before last night and this morning, she'd missed every piece of Clarke especially this piece, the piece that trusted her enough to give herself to her completely, and now…now it was time to show her how grateful and appreciative she was.

 

Moving down to Clarke’s chest placing kisses as she went until she reached Clarke’s jeans, unbuttoning them and quickly pulling them down Clarke’s leg removing them and throwing them behind her, moving her hands up she grabbed hold of Clarke panties pulling them down repeating the action she’d performed with Clarke’s jeans, crawling back up Clarke’s legs she moved up until she was exactly where she wanted to be…where she needed to be, leaning down she kissed Clarke's hairless mound with an open mouth, knowing Clarke could feel the heat from her mouth, not thinking anymore, she dove straight down and plunged her tongue into Clarke's tight, wet clit. She placed her hands on Clarke’s hips holding onto Clarke as she plunged her tongue deeper she felt Clarke’s hip buck against her feeling Clarke's back quickly arching off the bed at the sudden, but very wanted, intrusion, the action causing Clarke’s hips to push against Lexa's hands. Lexa started to move, alternating between swirling inside of Clarke and licking and sucking her lover's clit.

 

Up, Sucking. Teething. Down. Swirling. Blowing her warm breath. And then back up to repeat the same action.

 

Clarke wanted so badly to touch Lexa, to make Lexa feel the way she was feeling but she knew this side of Lexa, she knew once her ‘commander or Heda as Lexa preferred’ came out to play the most pleasurable option for them both was for her to just do as ‘Heda’ told because she follows through with her punishments. And what a cruel punishment it would be to have Lexa stop when she was getting closer and closer to falling over the edge. Feeling herself getting closer and closer Clarke grabbed the headboard tighter than before, knuckles became white, at the same time she tightened her knuckles her hips bucked up and naturally grounded up onto Lexa’s face unabashedly. She missed this. Missed Lexa. Missed her inside of her! Clarke wanted all of her, In every way imaginable. Lexa could sense Clarke's closeness, but she didn't want her to cum just yet, so she stopped abruptly. Clarke's head flew up.

 

“What?? Why did you stop??” Clarke asked looking up at Lexa, her breathing hot and heavy. Lexa smirked at her and crawling up Clarke’s body placing a kiss on the base of Clarke’s neck:

 

“I wanna try something we haven't done in a while”

 

She smirked removing herself from the bed, she walked to the top drawer and pulled out a scarf, and slowly walked back to Clarke. Climbing back into the bed a back between her wife’s legs, Clarke smiled and leant her head forward so Lexa could cover her eyes.

 

“Remember the rules…you do as I say….so that means No peaking once it's tied, I'll be right back”

 

Clarke’s eyes filled with lust so much so they turned a darker shade of blue, she couldn’t believe she was so wet, she had been so close to cumming by her wife’s highly skilled mouth, so close to having fireworks exploding behind her eyes. Clarke could hear commotion in their bathroom but had no idea what her wife was doing. The longer she waited for Lexa to return the wetter she got with anticipation, ‘something we haven't done in awhile’ she thought. There were so many things they hadn't done in a while, ‘so many hot, steamy, sexy things we haven't done that I so badly want to do again.’ she thought.

 

Clarke was lost in her thoughts until she felt rather than heard the bed dip. Lexa crawled her way up the bed and on top of Clarke until they were almost level, bending down to Clarke’s ear without touching her body at all.

 

“I need you to be a good girl and stay quiet for me okay?” Clarke nodded her head once feeling the heat rising between her legs again. “Good…because the angels are asleep, and we don't want to wake them do we?” Clarke let out a shaky breath as she shook her head from side to side once, finding her breath she said

 

“No, we don't want that”

 

“good girl” the brunette said taking her wife’s earlobe into her mouth, her teeth gently grazing and pinching at Clarke's skin. Clarke shivered at the action it was such a turn on. Still waiting (not so) patiently trying to rub her legs together, seeking friction to get any ease of the throbbing happening between her legs that she could. Lexa quickly swatted her legs apart “ ah ah ah…..be patience my love….I will take care of you. I promise.”

 

 

With that being said Clarke felt warm hands run up her thighs, massaging along the way, gentle yet firm, getting so close to where she so desperately wanted Lexa to be. Lexa reached her destination and ran her fingers through very very wet folds, as if collecting it for a future memory. There was a slight pause, And then a very loud grunt “ ughhhh…fuuu..” Clarke said as she felt something long and thick enter her slick pussy. Lexa had strapped up. Oh god how Clarke wants to see this. She doesn't want the stupid blindfold. She wants to see Lexa ram into her time and time again until she explodes, there was something so sexy and arousing seeing Lexa strapped up and thrusting into her. As she always did Lexa started off a little slow to let Clarke adjust to the sudden intrusion, it wasn't often they used strap ons but when they did she never rushed it, she let it build and build until there was no more holding back for either of them. She worked her way up moving a little faster until she knew she could set a pace they both would enjoy.

 

With every hard, fast thrust Clarke’s moans for louder and louder. Hearing the moans increasing in volume Lexa slowed and bent over Clarke “Hey Shhhhhhh my love, Do I need to put something in that pretty little mouth of yours to stop you from being so loud”

 

Clarke quickly shook her head, that was the last thing she wanted. “No no no….I’ll be quiet I promise…. but it feels so good….you feel so good inside me...Heda.” Lexa literally jolted her hips forward at that nickname, like she physically couldn't help it, Clarke turned her on in the best of ways. Made her eager to want to please her loving wife, As she picked her pace back up she started slamming harder into her lover, Clarke bit the inside of her bottom lip, hard, drawing blood, but she needed to keep quiet, it was all becoming too much, she could feel her body filling with anticipation that feeling kept on building and building until she couldn't contain her words any longer “OH FUCK….. Lex I'm so close, I wanna come…I wanna come together…oh fuuuuu…”

 

Hearing Clarke say she wanted them to cum together was hot, causing Lexa to all but rip Clarke's blindfold off her head so that blue could meet green. Clarke let out a blissful moan. Watching Lexa fuck her into oblivion had to be the HOTTEST thing she had ever seen in her entire life. Watching Lexa’s breast jump up and down with every hard thrust she was giving her “Fuck Lexa” Lexa stopped her thrusting for a second making her instantly realise her mistake “I’m sorry….I mean Fuck Heda” with a smirk Lexa continued her pace and took both of her hands to Clarke's breasts and slowly started rolling her nipples between thumb and pointer finger. Clarke’s back arched even higher off the bed, throwing her head back along with it “Ugh lexxxxx, I’m….So…..Close” the sentence only spurred Lexa on even more

 

“look at me Wanheda…” Clarke felt her stomach clench at the nickname, the urging of desire exploding inside her making her need to come even more pressing “Look at me… I wanna see you…and I wanna hear you say my name….tell me what you want”

 

“FUCK…” Clarke let out biting her lip again as her insides grew tighter and tighter that bubble inside her growing bigger as she managed to say the name and the words her wife desired to hear so much “Make me come…. Heda”

 

Lexa was just as close as Clarke. Lexa could hear the sweet slickness of her thrusting in and out of Clarke’s pussy. Between Clarke's encouraging and super sexy moans and the other end of the dildo driving hard into her clit, she herself was about to explode and see stars. Clarke looked up at Lexa, they looked deep into each other's eyes. And all it took was for Lexa to lean forward resting their foreheads together and uttering one sentence “It's time Wanheda….come with me” With that Lexa pumped as fast as she could for ten seconds before giving one final long hard thrust that final thrust was all it took for Clarke to go tumbling over, forgetting about not being able to touch, her hands flew to Lexa’s back needing something to grip and claw at, starting from the top, she scratched all the way down to her ass, not painfully hard not enough to break the skin but definitely enough to leave some marks behind. And those scratches Clarke made, along with watching Clarke fly over the edge, was all it took for Lexa to fly along with her, they slowly helped each other ride the others orgasm out. Clarke squeezing Lexa’s ass and then scratching back up her back. As Lexa was continuing to thrust slowly into Clarke until they both came back down. Slowly herself down until she’d completely stopping her thrusting, her breathing heavy and hard. Loosening the straps of the strap on and removing it allowing it to fall onto the bed, Lexa fell to Clarke's side while moving to nuzzle Clarke’s neck with her nose. It was Clarke who then took Lexa’s hands into hers, kissing every single knuckle with love, pulling the brunette closer to her “It feels so good to have you back home...having you....my beautiful, sexy, smart, amazing, adorable wife back here after so long….having you back home…I was so lost without you, and yet here you are, you found me, and I feel so grounded with you by my side so safe. I love you. A million billion trillion stars in the sky Lexa Woods! Until the day I take my last breath and even then it will be you I love in the afterlife.” Lexa got a little teary eyed and Clarke wiped each and every one of her tears away. “I love you too Clarke Woods!!! In this life and the next and all the ones that come after that.” Clarke kissed Lexa hard, threw her leg over Lexa's hips again and leant down to whisper in her ear “Now Heda….it's Wanheda’s turn to take care of you” and that is what led into 3 more rounds of hot wild sex that night. 

* * *

** Monday Morning-07:15am (27th March 2017) **

Clarke and Lexa were sat on the couch, Clarke was straddling Lexa’s lap her hands gripping on to Lexa's neck and hair, as Lexa’s hands gently ran up and down her back, her fingertips running over Clarke’s skin sending shivers down her wife's spine. Lexa’s hands were still cold from the bottle of water she had been drinking moments ago, the same bottle which was now resting on the couch to Lexa’s right. At 6:30am Clarke received a call in the morning informing her that the nursery was closed due to another bout of sickness going around, she’d called Octavia straight away and the two had a decision about all things related to the nursery and bugs going around, they’d both received the phone call this morning and Octavia had already messaged all the other moms finding out quickly it was the exact same thing the twins and Zachary had got sick with. They continued to gossip until Zachary began crying and Octavia had to go check on him. After that Clarke had made her way back to the bedroom finding Lexa was in the shower, she checked on the twins making sure they were both still asleep, she walked back into her bedroom after some quick thinking she joined Lexa in the shower knowing Lexa wouldn't have locked the door in case of an emergency. Although Lexa was surprised she instantly welcomed the Blonde, leaning out and kissing Clarke lovingly before pulling her into the shower with her shirt still on, soon enough they were both naked and getting lost in each other as the water dropped down on them both seemingly amping up their passion and desire. After Last night Lexa wasn’t sure she had enough energy but as soon as their lips connected there was nothing stopping her or the passions inside her and ultimately they ended up with Clarke pressed against the wall of the shower, with Lexa pressed against her as she worked her ‘magic’. After Clarke had came Lexa insisted that they actually wash much to Clarke’s protests, but after a promise they would continue their love making later that night Clarke relented, turning and allowing Lexa to lather her up with shower gel, ignoring who was rubbing her back she continued to wash as Lexa did the same both of them washing off, then jumping out the shower one at a time, Lexa got herself dressed in the bathroom whilst Clarke went into their bedroom finding herself a pair of jeans and a skinny t-shirt, along with her Calvin Klein underwear.

 

Ten minutes after she started getting dressed Lexa was emerging from the bathroom completely dressed in Skinny jeans and a lose t-shirt that hugged her in all the right places. Clarke still after eight years couldn't work out how Lexa only took ten minutes to look so perfect, as Lexa emerged from the bathroom she walked over to Clarke kissing her on the cheek once before telling her she was going downstairs to get breakfast ready. Clarke watched her walk out of the room before returning to getting dressed brushing her hair and making sure that she looks as close to perfect as she could manage, she decided not to wear make up knowing Lexa loved her natural skin. She’d poured some facial cream onto her hands, rubbing it into her face and neck before double checking her hair and her outfit looked as perfect as possible, once she was happy she’d walked downstairs, finding Lexa sitting on the couch drinking a bottle of water eyes closed as she sipped some of the water smirking at the brunette she had walked over and straddled her lap making Lexa almost spill her water all over herself. That had led to some playful comments and then to their current Make out session. They had been making out for about twenty minutes when they both heard a door open, knowing it was the twins bedroom door by the sound of two sets of footsteps that followed the sound of the door opening. They both pulled back at the same time, Clarke removed herself from Lexa’s lap sitting next to her wife as they both kept their attention on the staircase waiting for twins to emerge from upstairs, they smiled and laughed softly as they heard the twins talking to each other;

 

“They’re not there Livy”

 

“Where are they?....I want Mommy and Mama”

 

“Maybe Mommy is playing hide and seek and Mama is playing too”

 

“I don’t like it Oz...It’s scary”

 

“It’s ok Livy....I’ll protect you....” They both listened as there was a moment of silence, Lexa imagined her son hugging his twin sister, trying his best to make her feel safe and unscarred. About a minute passed by before Oscar spoke again

 

 “Let’s look downstairs Livy...Mommy likes loads of coffee...” He confidently said, obviously making sure his sister didn’t get too scared. Soon enough they both saw Oscar come into their line of sight, he stepped down the stairs one at a time his hand behind him holding onto Olivia’s hand helping his sister stay calm and walk down the stairs. As he continued stepping down his attention turned to the couch where his Mama and Mommy were sitting, as soon as he saw them a massive smile spread across his face and her turned back to Olivia, who’s attention was on her feet and the stairs, waiting for her to be on the last step.  Lexa smiled at the sight in front of her, how cute Oscar and Olivia both were, Oscar in his dinosaur pyjamas and Olivia in her Unicorn pyjamas. God how she’d missed waking up every morning and waiting for the twins to wake up, she’d forgot how excited she’d get every day just waiting to see her children, they were the best and most purest part of her and everyday she felt an insane amount of pride seeing the grow and develop more. And now she was getting it all back and the happiness inside her was overwhelming. She was forced out of her thoughts when Oscar softly spoke to his sister “See Livy, Mommy and Mama are here”

 

Lexa watched as Olivia looked at her and Clarke, a massive smile bursting onto her face as she giggled once and took off running to them. As soon as Olivia took off running Oscar did as well, the seeming excitement he had been hiding to make sure his sister was happy exploded inside him, as Olivia reached Clarke and jumped onto her lap hugging her tightly, Oscar reached Lexa doing the same thing holding onto his Mama. “Good Morning My Prince” Lexa softly whispered placing a gentle kiss on the side of her son’s head as he held onto her.

 

“Morning Mama” He sweetly responded holding onto her for a few more minutes before he loosened his hold and pushed himself up looking at her and smiling brightly “You look pretty Mama”

 

“Thank you Oz....you look very handsome”

 

“Thank You Mama” He sweetly responded, his hand reached up and rested on his Mama’s shoulder just near her neck. He smiled at her before reaching forward and hugging her again “It’s not a dream Mama” He firmly said making Lexa smile softly at the words.

 

“No it’s not a dream bubba”

 

“You’re not going away anymore Mama?”

 

“Never again I promise” Lexa responded softly, reaching up she smiled at him before leaning forward kissing him on the cheek and making him giggle and smile. “Well not unless Auntie Rae wants to have a movie night, but sometimes you’ll be able to come with me....not all the time but sometimes...is that ok?”

 

“That’s ok Mama”

 

“Good” Lexa smiled when Oscar leant forward hugging her again, looking to Olivia seeing the little girl was resting against her Mommy’s chest hugging her tightly her attention on her Mama and Brother. “Is that ok with you too Princess?”

 

“Yes Mama”

 

“Thank you Princess.....and you too my Prince”

 

“You’re welcome” They both said at the same time, making them both laugh softly before Oscar turned his attention to his Mama and softly asked “Can I have breakfast please Mama?”

 

“Of course, come on My Prince, you and I will make some breakfast whilst Mommy and Livy have some cuddle time...how’s that sound Princess?”

 

“Awesome Mama...I like cuddles.....Can I have pancakes please Mama?”

 

“Of course you can Princess” Lexa started to respond as Oscar jumped off her lap and gently pulled her hand until she was standing up “What would you like on them?”

 

“Chocolate” Olivia excitedly responded sitting herself up and clapping her hands softly “Loads of Chocolate Mama” She giggled out making Clarke and Lexa laugh as well.

 

“Ok then....what juice would you like?”

 

“Apple Juice please Mama”

 

“Ok Princess....What would you like babe?” She asked turning her attention to her wife, as she leant forward grabbing her bottle of water from the couch “No coffee for you though...not for another few hours at least”

 

“Why am I not allowed coffee?”

 

“Oscar, why isn’t Mommy allowed too much Coffee?”

 

“Because too much coffee is bad Mama...it has loads of caffin in it and that’s not good”

 

Lexa smiled at Clarke, raising her eyebrows as her smile turned into a smirk “See....that’s why...our son has spoken too much Caffeine isn’t good, therefore, no coffee for you right now”

 

“Fine....but only because my handsome prince says so”

 

“Would it be for any other reason?”

 

“Of course not...anyway I’ll have some pancakes with some fruit...you can surprise me with whatever fruit you want except Strawberries of course....and I’ll have some Apple juice as well...”

 

“Ok then....come on Oz let’s go make some breakfast...”

 

“YEAH...” Oscar excitedly let out as he and his Mama began walking towards the kitchen, as he looked up at his Mama’s hand he noticed the bottle in it and sweetly asked “Can I have some water please Mama?”

 

Lexa smiled at her son before softly answering “Of course, we can get you a bottle in a second”

 

“No Mama...Can I have some of yours?”

 

“Of course you can” Lexa smile removing the lid of the bottle and handing it to her son, gently placing her hand on his neck and guiding him into the kitchen as he drank and walked at the same time.

 

Clarke watched Lexa and Oscar’s interaction; she’d missed seeing so much, she’d even missed the lectures Lexa used to give her about drinking too much Coffee, how Oscar used to copy his Mama and want to share everything with her, how when Lexa and Oscar made breakfast Olivia would cuddle with her and they’d talk all about Princesses or Unicorns or whatever Olivia loved the most at that moment in time. But mostly, she just missed the family they used to be, and now she had seemingly got it back, it hadn’t even been two days yet but everything felt like it used to, like no time had passed by and nothing had changed at all. It felt great. Looking down at Olivia, she noticed the massive smile on her daughter’s face like she was the happiest little girl in the world. “Why are you so happy Princess?”

 

“Because everything is Perfect Mommy”

 

“Is it?”

 

“Yeah, Mommy is happy again...and Mama has come back home...And the bad dreams are all gone forever Mommy”

 

“So you’re a happy Princess then?”

 

“Yes Mommy.....Thank you for forgiving Mama Mommy”

 

“You’re Welcome baby girl” Clarke wanted to explain that there was nothing to forgive and that it was all a mistake, but she knew she was talking to a four year old, and Olivia wouldn’t understand all the complex events that had taken place, nor would she understand why everything happened. She smiled as Olivia leant forward hugging her tightly “Let’s have some proper cuddle time shall we?” She asked, smiling more when her daughter nodded her head into her chest. Clarke wrapped her arms around her daughter before she turned herself to her left laying herself down until she was resting her head on the armrest of the couch. Her daughter lying on her chest, her small hands holding onto her Mommy. “Now we can just cuddle and wait for breakfast” Olivia giggled and nodded her head into her Mommy’s chest, as Clarke looked down she could see the smile on her daughter’s face, the smile made her heart melt a little and happiness explode inside her as she looked at her daughter, so happy and content with lying against her.

 

** -Fifthteen minutes Later- **

Clarke and Olivia were still lying on the couch, silently cuddling each other. The whole time they’d been cuddling Clarke had been watching her daughter’s every move, taking in every small movement she made. Taking in how Olivia’s breathing was slower and more relaxed than normal. She noticed how content her daughter looked lying against her, her eyes closed as her hands lightly gripped onto Clarke’s t-shirt. As she laid there with Olivia, Clarke could hear Oscar and Lexa softly singing as they made breakfast, she knew from the lyrics that they were singing songs from Jungle Book, it was their favourite film and no matter how much Oscar watched it he’d never get bored, and neither would Olivia, it was the only film that she could put on and know for sure that she wouldn’t hear a peep out of them until it was finished. As she looked down at Olivia, her thoughts going to her daughter and son just as Oscar came running into the room his face a picture of excitement.

 

“Breakfast is ready Mommy”

 

“Thank you handsome” She smiled turning herself, the action making Olivia open her eyes and look up at her Mommy “Breakfast is ready Princess” Without a word, Olivia smiled brightly and unwrapped herself from her Mommy jumping down from her Mommy’s lap, turning and running happily to the kitchen quickly followed by her brother. Clarke laughed at the twins, standing herself up and walking to the kitchen she smiled when she saw the twins and Lexa all sitting at the table waiting patiently for her to join them before they ate. As she sat down at the table in her usual chair, smiling as she picked up a knife and fork Lexa had placed on the table. As she picked up the knife and fork Lexa softly spoke

 

“We only had enough juice for one glass of Apple Juice so I went with water instead for you, and gave our princess the Apple Juice”

 

“That’s fine, water’s good for you right?”

 

“Yes, a lot better than coffee” Lexa smirked out seeing the smile spread on Clarke’s face as they all began eating their pancakes.

 

Ten minutes passed and the four of them ate their breakfast and the twins talked about being sad they weren’t going to nursery to see all their friends. Clarke and Lexa finished their breakfast before the twins, they sat and listened to the twins talking, watching as they messily ate their pancakes and talked at the same time, they only stopped talking whenever they took a bite of their food. As Olivia took a sip of her Apple Juice she smiled at her Mommy, holding her glass carefully in her Mommy’s direction;

 

“Would you like some Apple juice Mommy?”

 

“I’m ok thank you baby girl”

 

“Are you sure Mommy? ...I don’t mind sharing with you”

 

“I’m sure Princess, but thank you for offering”

 

“You’re Welcome....Mama says it’s good to share with people”

 

“She does and she’s right”

 

“Can Mama do my hair today please Mommy?”

 

“Of course she can, you don’t have to ask Princess....I don’t mind”

 

“Ok Mommy”

 

Olivia smiled going back to eating her pancakes as she happily smiled occasionally drinking from her cup. Oscar remained quiet for a little bit turning his complete attention to his breakfast, once he was finished he let out a massive breath before gently pushing the plate forward and looking at his Mama

 

“That was delicos Mama”

 

“Delicious?”

 

“Yeah that word”

 

“Did you hear Auntie Raven say that?”

 

“Yeah, but she didn’t teach us it or what it means”

 

“Ah ok....so firstly you have to learn to say it....”

 

“How do you say it Mama?”

 

“Delicious”

 

“Delcos”

 

“Ok Copy me ok?” Oscar nodded his head at his Mama’s words his attention completely locked on her “De...”

 

“De...”

 

“Lici”

 

“Lici..”

 

“ious”

 

“ious”

 

“De...lic..ious....Delicious”

 

“De...lic...ious...Delicious....delicious....Is that right Mama?”

 

“Yes, that’s perfect”

 

“What does Delicious mean?” Oscar sweetly asked, his face was a picture of concentration as he pronounced the word his Mama had taught him.

 

“It means that something is really tasty and nice to eat....”

 

“Like it tastes better than anything else Mama?”

 

“Pretty much yeah, so when I enjoy something and it tastes really nice... I say it tastes delicious”

 

“Ok.......The pancakes were delicious Mama”

 

“Thank you handsome”

 

“You’re really welcome Mama”

 

Lexa smiled at her son’s sentence, the pride in his face was something she’d not seen in a while. He was so happy about learning a word. It was like he was back to the old Oscar, carefree and happy, like nothing in the world could stop him from being happy. Reaching over she ruffled his hair a little making him laugh softly “Seeing as your finished eating, why don’t you go get ready...I think me and Mommy can trust you to pick your own clothes can’t we?”

 

“Yes Mama...I can do it...I’m a big boy”

 

“Ok then....you go pick out your clothes and get dressed, and then I’ll come up and time you while you brush your teeth....how does that sound?”

 

“Perfect Mama....When I’m ready can you do my hair Mama?”

 

“Of course I can”

 

“Thank you Mama” Oscar sweetly let out before pushing his chair back and jumping down before turning and running into the kitchen, Clarke and Lexa laughed softly as they heard their son’s feet hitting against the stairs as he ran up them. Before they had a chance to say anything to each other the doorbell rang through the house, Lexa signalled that she’d answer it, standing up and walking to the door just as Olivia finished eating her pancakes.

 

“Finished Mommy” She sweetly said looking at her Mommy and smiling brightly at her, chocolate sauce all over her mouth and hands, the sight making Clarke laugh softly. Standing up from her chair she walked over to the kitchen sink, grabbing a kitchen towel (paper towel) she wet it turning to go back to Olivia she stopped smiling when Olivia appeared in front of her “Is that for me Mommy?”

 

“It is Princess....want Mommy to do it for you?”

 

“Yes please Mommy” Olivia sweetly responded her hands clasping in front of her, Clarke laughed softly kneeling down, gently she wiped Olivia’s hands before gently holding her daughter’s chin with her left hand before placing the wet paper towel in her right hand and wiping her daughter’s face with it until she was free of the chocolate sauce that was covering her face, pulling back Clarke smiled at her daughter “There we go…all clean and pretty again”

 

“Thank you Mommy” Olivia sweetly responded leaning up and kissing her Mommy before turning and walking out of the room.

 

Clarke laughed at the sweetness of her daughter before she quickly walked after her, as Olivia entered the living room seeing her Mama had let someone into the house, Olivia was grabbed from behind by her Mommy who wrapped her arms around her chest and lifted her off the ground placing kiss after kiss on her daughter's cheek making Olivia giggle loudly at the action “No Mommy….stop it tickles” Olivia laughed out as Clarke continued her action until Lexa coughed loudly making her stop in her tracks and placed the little girl on the floor, looking at Lexa seeing her look towards the far end of the couch she followed Lexa’s line of sight seeing a lady dressed in a suit a black padded folder on her lap a pen on her hand, Clarke wasn't expecting anyone and if she was honest the women looked like lawyer more than anything, running her hands through Olivia's hair she meant down kissing her daughter gently on the cheek before softly saying “You go get ready Princess, and you have to pick normal clothes ok no princess dresses today ok?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy “Good girl, and then I’ll time you brushing your teeth and Mama can do your hair….ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy…..can I wear jeans Mommy?”

 

“If you like Princess, as long as their clean and you remember to change your underwear and all the things we talked about, ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy, I won't forget I promise”

 

“I know you won't Princess…go on….if you need me then shout ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy” Olivia sweetly responded before turning and quickly moving towards the stairs carefully climbing them one step at a time so she didn’t fall. Clarke watched her daughter carefully until she was at the top of the stairs. Once she was sure Olivia was safely at the top and heading towards her bedroom, turning to Lexa she questioningly looked at her wife, seeing the look Lexa stepped forward and quietly said;

 

“This is Miss Charlotte Fox...she’s from Child Protective Services...”

 

“Child Protective Services?”

 

“Yeah...she needs to talk to us”

 

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooooo CPS/DFS/Social Services are at the house and wanna talk to Clarke and Lexa...will they reveal who is responsible for the phonecall? Will they take the kids? (Spoiler-Nah not happening lol), What will happen? Only time will tell lol :-) I don't like putting many spoilers but I know that there are mom's (and dad's too) from the LGBT community that read this and I know that it could perhaps be a little closer to home so I wanna say the twins WILL NOT be taken away from Clarke and Lexa, this is just to build the drama for a BIG Chapter and BIG Storyline break that's coming up :-) 
> 
> Additional Note: For those that don't speak English or prefer to comment in a different language, I speak Spanish, German, French and South African (And English of course lol) So if you speak any of those languages then please feel free to comment in that language as I'll be able to understand...whatever makes you all feel more comfortable :-)


	24. Protective Services

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ms Fox talks to the family.

**Chapter 24-Protective Services**

Clarke felt an immense amount of fear rush through her whole body as it registered in her brain what Lexa had said, "Why?" Clarke was the only thing she managed to ask as the panic and worry inside her instantly rose to the surface, the main thought in her mind was why was this women here...she was pulled out of her own thoughts when Lexa gently took hold of her hand, pulling Clarke's attention back to her.

"Let's sit down and talk to Ms Fox ok?" Clarke nodded her head at Lexa, letting the brunette guide her to the couch both of them sitting down on the couch facing Ms Fox. Taking a small breath, she felt Clarke tightened her grip on her hand, interlocking their fingers she wet her lips before finally asking "You said you needed to talk to us, what about?"

Ms Fox half smiled at both women opening her folder revealing a notepad and numerous pieces of paper "I understand that this is most likely very worrying and unnerving for you both, but I want to make it clear that I have no prejudice or preconceived thoughts about either of you, however, I still have to do my job. Now the reason I'm here because on Saturday 25th March 2017 at approximately 22:58, the Department of Child Protective Services received a complaint regarding yourselves..."

"What do you mean a complaint?" Lexa asked, complaint could mean anything, from child abuse to neglect to a whole different realm of things. "And who made this complaint?"

"The complaint was made via an anonymous call to our hotline; the person on the other side reported you and Miss Griffin..."

"Woods" Clarke tried to stop herself interrupting but she couldn't, maybe if this person gave the wrong name that could work for them. Maybe there was a mistake and she and Lexa weren't the people that the complaint was meant to be about.

"Excuse me?"

"I apologise for interrupting you, it's just my last name is Woods, me and Lexa are married...my legal name is Woods, I haven't been known by Griffin for a long time"

"I apologise Ms Woods, the complaint we received referred to you as Miss Griffin, and it also mentioned that you and Miss Woods were separated"

"We aren't, we're still married and very much together"

"I understand, like I said my apologies Ms Woods...As I was explaining, the complaint that was made named you and Ms Woods as being neglectful and abusive towards your children..."

"WHAT... Me and Lexa would never do that...we've never even slapped the twins...their well feed..."

"Ms Woods please...I understand your shock, and that is why I'm here...I understand that this may not be a true claim however we have a service and a duty to every child in America to look into claims and complaints such as this. Please understand I am not accusing you or your wife of anything I'm just here to do my job and insure that this claim is just that"

Lexa and Clarke tried to take in the words that were coming out of Ms Fox's mouth, neither of them was really sure about what was going on, this couldn't be real, this had to be some sick joke that someone was playing on them. They couldn't think of anyone that would hold that much of a grudge against them that they would call Child Protective Services on them. As she tried to process everything that was going on, Lexa looked to Clarke seeing the tears rushing down her wife's face she removed her hand from Clarke's, wrapping her arms around Clarke and pulling her close, Clarke instantly wrapped her arms around Lexa her tears flowing quickly and heavily down her cheeks. Finally finding her words Lexa looked at Ms Fox and asked "So what does all that mean? You're not taking our kids...right?"

"Ms Woods we cannot remove a child or children from their home without just cause, however, as a result of this complaint made we have to investigate, fully and effectively..."

"So what exactly does all of that mean?"

"There are numerous steps to an investigation and I have to make you aware that even if this investigation proves to be fruitless and completely false, a record will still be kept...just in case any further complaints or cases are filed in the future...but I have to stress that if this case is proved to be false then that will be marked on the record and it will be completely clear to anyone that neither of you was in the wrong or abusive or neglectful in any way to your children..."

"Ok, I understand all of that but what happens now? You've explained everything about the claim or complaint to us but we don't know what any of that means...what you being here means?"

"Firstly, we will continue to talk, to allow me to gain a further understanding of your relationship and in fact any issues or situations that could have caused someone to make a complaint against...once I've completed that I'll need to talk to your children..." Looking down at her file she guided her finger along the badge stopping it looking up she continued "Olivia and Oscar Woods without either of you present... I'll need you both to sign this consent form, giving me permission to talk to them alone..."

"That might be difficult...the them talking to you alone part, not the signing the form part...they don't like strangers, or talking to people separately...their used to being together and doing everything together...it's one of the things that being a twin entails sometimes...they have a bond that makes them feel safe around each other..."

"If they'd be more comfortable talking to me together then that is fine...whatever will cause less stress for them"

"They should be fine as long as their together...and they know we're only in the next room"

"That's great, thank you...now I have to make you fully aware that I am unable to give out any further information into the complaint made, the information I have given you is all I am allowed to give out...I am not in anyway making any predetermined judgements against either of you regarding the allegations made against you in the complaint...I will be completely impartial towards the decision I make and obtaining any information from your children...I'm only here to investigate and get all the information I need to make a clear and accurate decision on your case"

"Ok we understand"

"Good...shall we start?"

Lexa looked down at Clarke; the blonde was still crying her tears rushing down her cheeks onto Lexa's jeans. Reaching up she wiped away the tears from Clarke's cheek, placing a gentle kiss Clarke's check, she knew there wasn't anything she could do that would make her wife feel better, she knew because the thought of losing the kids was heartbreaking and gut-wrenching, the thought alone made her want to break down. She had no idea what she'd do if it actually happened, she was pretty sure her whole world wouldn't be worth it anymore, she loved her kids more than life itself. Pushing her own emotional thoughts and feelings aside, knowing if she kept thinking about her then she'd lose control and end up crying her eyes out, and right now she needed to be the strong one, not just for herself but for Clarke and the twins, this would be scary enough for the twins without seeing their Mama crying and upset. Shaking out every thought in her brain, forcing herself to concentrate on getting through this talk with Ms Fox. Gently pulling herself back, she gently placed her hands on Clarke's shoulders pushing her forcing her to sit up. She re-wiped Clarke's cheeks, removing the fresh tears and the small remainder of the old tears on Clarke's cheeks. Looking into Clarke's eyes she softly asked;

"Are you ok to do this?"

Clarke looked deep into Lexa's eyes seeming to find strength and power in Lexa's eyes, even though just being around Lexa made her feel stronger than she was, there was something about her wife's eyes that gave her extra strength. Taking a breath in sniffed back more tears, nodding her head she looked wet her lips and softly spoke "Yeah, I'm ok….we have to do this…for the twins" Turning and looking at Ms Fox Clarke spoke again "Where exactly would you like to start Ms Fox?"

"Tell me a little about yourselves, I like to know a little more about you both…..Knowing about you both and why you decided to have children allows me to gauge your relationship a little better….of course neither of you is obliged to tell me anything too sensitive or personal, what you tell me is completely up to you both, however, I strongly advise that you tell me anything that may help disprove the allegation made against you"

"Me and Lexa met when we were in High School, Lexa transferred her from Polis Academy, I was 16 and so was she, we shared our first kiss about a month after we met and about a month and a bit after some small complications we made it official, and we've been together ever since"

"Have you ever broken up or had marital issues?"

"You want to know if we actually broke up, to what...see if that part of the claim was true?"

"Ms Woods, I apologise I didn't mean to offend or upset you...I was just trying to find a sensitive way to approach the subject itself"

"Just ask us...we're not stupid, a little defensive maybe but we understand your only doing your job...right Lex?" Clarke finished turning her attention to Lexa who looked at her softly smiling and nodding her head, a look of almost pride on her face as she looked at her wife. "So please Ms Fox, ask any questions you wish to"

"Ok...Thank You...Have you ever separated for a period of time since you became a couple in High School?"

There was a moment of silence as Clarke contemplated whether or not to lie to Ms Fox, she didn't know how much this woman knew about her and Lexa and their family, and did she know about the divorce petition. Was it worth the risk lying about it, especially when her and Lexa were actually working things out...as the thoughts spiralled inside her brain Lexa's voice filled the room bringing her out of her thoughts.

"We were separated for about six months, maybe just a little over that"

"In the interest of fairness I have to make you aware that when a claim or complaint is made we look into public records and we came across a petition for a divorce, one that was made roughly six months ago by you Ms Woods" Ms Fox explains looking at Clarke first before looking at them both and continuing "Is that petition still being filed?"

"Me and Clarke went through a rough patch, someone told her I cheated and because of a few things it lead to her believing the claim...which was totally false by the way..."

"Does that mean you are separated?"

"No...we worked things out months ago..I proved to Clarke that I was being truthful and that I never cheated on her...and that I never did before nor will I ever...Clarke retracted her petition for divorce...it was just a small bump in the road, the twins never suffered because of it"

"I completely understand, relationships are complicated and sometimes a break is needed. I'm not judging anyone I swear, I just need a full picture before I can talk to the kids, I don't want to mention anything that may upset them...Whilst you were separated did either of you have any relations or indeed relationships with anyone else?"

"No...I lived in another apartment but that was mainly for work purposes and to make things a little easier on Clarke...she was struggling thinking I was a cheater and living in the same house as me, it was for the best"

"That's completely understandable"

"Clarke did have someone stay over some nights though...her friend Roan stayed over most nights, she didn't feel safe on her own with the twins...but he misread her signals as something more than friendship..." Lexa explained reaching over and taking Clarke's hand in hers squeezing it softly making the Blonde smile at the gesture. Interlocking their fingers Clarke took a small breath in before looking at Ms Fox and talking;

"Me and Roan...Roan Gardia...we kissed a few times, I wasn't in a good place at the time and I needed someone as some form of comfort, I was scared of being alone and I needed help with the twins and stuff around the house needed fixing and he was just there for me, I didn't think anything more of it than friendship...I'm gay I don't like guys in that way, we kissed a few times but I still didn't think anything of it, it was just a peck nothing more...but Roan didn't see it like that...He thought it was more than it is?"

"And there was never anything sexual between you?"

"No, He'd hold me sometimes when I would cry during the night but nothing sexual happened between us, I've only ever had sex with one person...and that's Lexa. Roan took my friendship as something more than it was, and I messed up because I should have seen it and stopped him thinking it was more than it actually was." Clarke looked at Ms Fox trying to gauge the women's reaction and whether or not she was judging her for her choices, at the moment all she could see was a small smile on the woman's face. "I honestly didn't realise that he was in love with me, when he said I love you I thought he meant it in a friendship way..."

"Ms Woods...I completely understand your explanation, I'm not here to judge you I promise...I understand you and Mr Gardia's relationship was only friendship based from your point of view"

"Ok"

"When was the last time you spoke to Mr Gardia?"

"Um, A while ago, he turned up here" Clarke thought about mentioning the incident where Roan had woken Oscar up scaring him and then leading to Lexa stepping in and physically moving Roan across the room trying to protect her son. She decided not to say that, she didn't want to explain that Roan effectively broke into her house without her knowing it then gave Olivia medicine that could have killed her daughter. Instead she opted to tell Ms Fox about the physical altercation between Lexa and Roan, mainly because she was almost sure that the neighbours would tell Ms Fox if she asked them. And she figured there was no way that any of the neighbours could know what happened inside her and Lexa's house. "He turned up here, I think he was trying to win me over or something, we exchanged words and when he grabbed me Lexa stepped in, he pushed her to the floor and stepped forward shouting that he loved me, he was acting like he was going to hit me...then Lexa jumped in and pushed him onto the ground, after he got up she told him to stay away and since then we haven't seen him"

"How long ago was this incident?"

"Nearly two months ago"

"And you've had no contact with him since?"

"No, Me and Lexa got back together just after that...I mean like officially back together...I haven't seen or spoke or been contacted by him at all...nor have I contacted him...and I don't really want to if I'm honest"

"Is there a reason for that?"

Ignoring the inner part of her telling her to be truly honest she decided to say a truth that was less likely to cause any issues or problems with them proving they were fit parents and this claim was completely false "He told me he loved me...I can't keep going to him and being friendly with him knowing he was thinking of me in a completely different way than I do of him...that wouldn't be fair on him, just stringing him along like he isn't a person and doesn't deserve to be treated like one..."

"That's completely understandable Ms Woods...was he every excessively aggressive around the children?"

"No he never rose his voice to me other than the night he pushed Lexa...if he did I would have asked him to leave us alone as soon as it happened"

"Ok...Thank You Ms Woods..."

"Clarke...you can call me Clarke and Lexa...well Lexa...Ms Woods might get a little confusing for us all"

"Thank You Clarke...Lexa have you been with anyone since you moved out and into the apartment?"

"No, none...I spent most of my time in my apartment or at the studio producing...me and my twin sister Raven own a recording studio in Beacon Hill...it's called Twin Heda Records...I spend most of my time there with her working on music...I would just go from there to home and then back again...unless I had the twins..."

"And when you had the twins would you stay here or would they go to your apartment?"

"My Apartment, I figured that it would be nice for Clarke to have some time on her own. I got the apartment with an additional bedroom so the twins would have their own room, and I got them their own toys and clothes for when they stayed...and My sister in Law checked the place over on Clarke's behalf to make sure that it was safe for the twins"

"Your sister in law?"

"Yeah"

"Can I take her name?"

"Of course...its Octavia Woods...her maiden name is Blake...She's married to my twin sister"

"That would be Raven Reyes-Woods Yes?"

"Just Raven Woods...we dropped the Reyes part a long time ago...I'm sure you've come across the files on our mother and the problems she had..."

"I have...to be honest that is why this complaint is being taken so seriously...that sounds harsh but we have to monitor these things incase they continue on through generations"

"It's ok I understand, it's not like my mother was only visited once...I understand It was all explained to me when my case was closed before I moved to Boston...and Clarke knows all about it, I haven't kept anything from her, especially anything related to my mother"

"Great, so I have to ask exactly how long have you been back together?"

"Just over two months, I moved back in Friday...my sister is going through some issues in her marriage and I wanted to be there for her whilst she found her feet, and we also didn't wanna rush me moving back in just incase it didn't work, then we'd have to disturb the twins and upset them again which we never want to do"

"I completely understand that and it makes full sense" Lexa and Clarke couldn't fully tell if Ms Fox was being truthful or not, after all they were sure it was her job to hide her emotions so she didn't give away her final decision on a case. "Is there anything further I need to know?, anything that the children might bring up that you want to clarify on now"

"Umm yeah….at some point Olivia thought I was trying to replace Lexa with Roan, we explained it to her and she was fine but if you bring him up she might get upset, she's been having nightmares about him hurting us since then"

"How exactly did she come to believe that?"

"He came to the park with me and the twins and a stranger told me and him we had beautiful children and he was a lucky daddy….she took it to heart and when he put a picture of us four in their bedroom it sent her over the edge"

"But she's aware that she doesn't have a daddy and he's not her parent….is he?"

"No he's not, we used a donor but we have his name in case they want to contact him in the future….and they are fully aware he isn't their daddy and that he's not replacing their Mama in anyway"

"Good….it's important they understand their Mama isn't leaving again…it'll help them feel more settled and having things explained to them will help them develop more in School….speaking of which, how are they getting along in Nursery?"

"Really good, They've been teaching them the alphabet reading and numbers, and how to write their names, Olivia didn't get it at first but Lexa taught her how to write her name and Oscar is on the way to writing his name, he struggles writing his middle name but my parents helped him wen he stayed with them the weekend just gone….and their vocabulary has improved so much over the last few months their learning new words and they understand them as well…they come out with the best lines sometimes and the concentration on their faces when they try and say the words….." Clarke felt a little embarrassed at getting rushed away, laughing for a second she quickly apologised "Sorry.."

"It's ok Clarke…I can see you love them a lot, you don't need to be embarrassed or apologise for being proud of them"

"Their memory is improving as well, they're still cautious of new people and they know not to talk to stranger. I think the two confuse them sometimes but in general their memory is getting so good, They'll be talking to each other and then suddenly one of them will talk about something that happened over a year ago, then they'll ask me if that's right and when I tell them it is the pride on their faces is so amazing, so pure and adorable" Feeling a squeeze at her hand she looked to Lexa seeing that same pride for the twins beaming from her wife's face "Lexa's sister Raven has been teaching them a lot of words as well, whenever she comes over or talks to them on the phone they come out with a new word, not really knowing what it is or how to say it correctly sometimes….then they'll ask Lexa to explain it to them and help them say it properly it's the cutest thing ever"

"How about with numbers? It says in this file that Lexa has dyscalculia, have the twins been tested for that?"

"We talked to the doctors and the opticians and they said there's no signs that they have it at present but we won't know for sure until they start in proper school and start using numbers every day, they've told us to keep an eye on them and do stuff with numbers…" Lexa began explaining she'd always hated the thought of the twins possibly having a condition because of her "They were last checked 6 months ago, and they're due for another test in a few weeks just before their birthday"

"Brilliant, as long as you're keeping track of it that's Brilliant"

"Really?"

"Yes, it's very important that your keeping an eye on them incase anything does develop, how you deal with situations is of massive importance to Child Protective Services, and the fact that your being productive in how your handling their care is good"

"Ok..That's good"

"Very good" Ms Fox let out, for a moment Clarke and Lexa could have swore she was going to laugh at Lexa's slightly shocked but happy response "I believe that is all the information I need from you both, I may have more questions after I speak to the twins but that is routine some things may come up that I need clarification on, you both understand?"

Clarke looked to Lexa who nodded her head softly at her, looking to Ms Fox she softly said "Yeah we both understand" Before Clarke could ask if she needed to go get the twins, Oscar and Olivia bounded down the stairs stopping when they saw the stranger sitting on the couch talking to their Mommie's. Oscar clasped his hands over his hips and pivoted back looking at his Mommie's and whispering;

"Mama..."

"Yes Handsome" Lexa smiled always amazed at her son's initial shyness with a stranger. She watched as her son shyly walked over to her and grabbed her hand not looking at the unknown woman in the living room. Laughing softly at the motion she let her son pull her off the couch, standing up she let him pull her to where Olivia was standing covering her mouth with her fingers as she shifted back and forth on her feet looking from her Mommy to the strange lady she didn't know. Giggling to herself she bit her bottom lip before running to her Mommy full force hitting her Mommy's chest with a soft thud, quickly wrapping her arms around her Mommy and leaning into her, giggling as she hugged into her Mommy's chest looking towards her Mama and Oscar burying her head in her Mommy's chest. Watching as her brother spoke to their Mama:

"Mama...who is that lady? ...is she bad?"

"Oh no baby she's not bad..." Lexa softly explained sitting onto her knees on the floor holding her son's hands as he moved forward closing the space between them. "That is Ms Fox...Charlotte..."

"That's a pretty name Mama"

"It is...a very pretty name...she's here because she has to talk to you and Olivia"

"Why Mama? Was I bad?"

"No you weren't bad my prince...see Ms Fox works for people that look after children and they just want to make sure that your happy with all your toys and with me and Mommy"

"We're always Happy Mama"

"I know you are...but Ms Fox just needs to ask you some questions"

"But I'm not in trouble?"

"No not at all, if you were Mama would tell you wouldn't see"

"Yeah...like when I shout really loud and I'm not meant to"

"Exactly...so can you talk to Ms Fox for me?"

"Yes Mama...I'll do it"

"Thank you baby boy"

"You're welcome Mama" Oscar smiled at Lexa leaning forward wrapping his arms around his Mama's neck hugging her tightly before pushing back and smiling at her before leaning forward and kissing his Mama on the lips "I love you Mama" He sweetly and unexpectedly said.

"I love you too...My Handsome Prince" Lexa smiled back peppering her son's cheek with numerous kisses as he let out a dirty giggle at the feeling of his Mama's kisses "Ok, anything else you wanna say Handsome?"

"Ahmmmmm...OH Can you do my hair please Mama?"

"I'll do it once you talk to the nice lady ok?"

"You Mama Promise Mama?"

"Of course I Mama Promise...I love doing your hair baby boy, it makes me happy"

"It makes me happy too Mama"

"Good, then you ready?" Lexa softly asked looking back at Ms Fox who was smiling at the two of them, Lexa turned back to her son watching as his face contorted slightly before he softly smiled and nodded his head "Good boy" She reassuringly said standing herself up, once she was stood up she leant down kissing Oscar on the side of his head, as she turned to walk back over to Clarke and Olivia, Oscar pulled at her hand;

"Wait Mama..."

"What's wrong my prince?"

"Do I look ok Mama? I concen...I tried really hard"

"You concentrated?"

"Yeah" Oscar laughed out giggling up at his Mama, "Con..." Oscar stopped himself not wanting to mess up the word, but looking at his Mama he saw the look of confidence and happiness she was giving him and he decided to keep trying "Con...cen...rat...ed...I Con..cen..traed...Mama?"

"Say it all together...come on you know you can do it my genius prince "

"Concentrated...I said it Mama" Oscar excitedly let out raising his arms in the air and jumping up and down happily as he looked at his Mama with so much pride in his face it was insane "I concentrated Mama, and I think it looks really nice" He let out as he calmed himself down and began talking about his clothing again "What do you think Mama?"

Lexa smiled at her son's need for approval from her, it was so sweet and pure of a thing that it made her smile even wider. Now taking the time to look at her son's clothing and taking in how he was dressed she realised he was wearing jeans that were almost identical to the ones she was wearing all the way down to the small tear over the left knee of the jeans, then she looked at his top seeing he was wearing a navy blue polo shirt, one she'd always told him he looked really handsome in, then she looked down at his feet seeing he was wearing his favourite minions socks. Smiling at her son's overall look she leant down looking him in the eyes and smiling before she softly said "I think you look perfect" Oscar smiled brightly and jumped forward not saying a word to his Mama, just hugging her tightly...as tight as he could. Hugging her son back she placed a gentle kiss on the top of his head, when he didn't let go she placed numerous kisses in a row on the same spot that seemed to do the trick as Oscar released his hold around her looking up at her proudly.

At the same time Lexa was talking to Oscar, Olivia looked up at her Mommy not releasing her hold on her Mommy as she looked up instead holding on a little tighter "Mommy, what did Mama say about the lady?"

"She said that you and Oscar need to talk to about how happy you are, and what you feel about Mommy and Mama"

"I love you and Mama"

"And we love you too….but she just wants to ask you some questions about our life and what we do?"

"Like nursery Mommy?"

"Yes, so she'll ask about what you do at Nursery and what you do when you get home, and what we do as a family"

"Do I have to answer all them Mommy?"

"You do baby, but if you don't like a question you can tell the lady and she'll ask you something else"

"Really Mommy?"

"Yeah you just have to tell her if you don't like the question ok?"

"Ok Mommy…..can Mama still do my hair Mommy?"

"After you talk to the lady then she can"

Olivia leant a little closer to her Mommy and lowered her voice "What's her name Mommy?"

"Her name is Ms Fox"

"What about her first name Mommy?"

"It's Charlotte"

"That's a nice name Mommy"

"It's not as nice as Olivia though hey…" Clarke added tickling her daughter with one hand making he little girl giggle and wriggle into her chest

"Your name is better Mommy"

"My name?"

"Yeah Princess Clarke is the best name EVER"

"Oh thank you Princess….but my name is Princess Clarke…just Clarke"

"That's still the best name Mommy"

"Can I tell you a secret?"

"Yes"

"My favourite name to be called isn't Clarke….it's Mommy, that's my favourite name to be called EVER" Clarke saw the massive smile spread across her daughter's face as she looked up at her "But that's only because you and Oscar call me it"

"It's my favourite word to say Mommy….but it's the same as Mama…I love them both the same"

"You are just the sweetest princess in the whole world…." Clarke beamed at her daughter's sweetness squeezing her arms tight around Olivia she placed kiss after kiss on the side and the top of her daughter's head making Olivia giggle softly

"Mommy?" Olivia softly mumbled into her Mommy's chest making Clarke loosen her hold so she could push herself up a little, which she did.

"Yes princess"

"Do you like my outfit?"

Clarke smiled at the question having heard Oscar ask Lexa something similar moments before hand, looking at her daughter she noticed she was wearing a white dress with a yellow ribbon across the middle of it, her feet cover with trainer socks of the minions, noticing it made Clarke giggle softly "Why the minions sock baby?"

"Because I love the minions, and you say that we can't wear dirty shoes inside cause it spreads the germs Mommy"

"I do say that don't I?"

"Yeah…" Olivia smiled happily looking up at her Mommy whilst gripping onto the dress she was wearing "I know you said no princess dresses Mommy but this is just a normal one so I think it's ok, is that right Mommy?"

"Yes that's right, you look beautiful princess"

"What's beautiful mean Mommy?"

"It's like pretty but a million times more…you know how Princesses are so pretty that it doesn't seem possible?" Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy, gripped on what she was saying "Well that's what beautiful, when something is so pretty it doesn't seem like they should be real"

"Thank you for saying I'm beautiful Mommy" Olivia sweetly let out walking forward and wrapping her arms around her Mommy

"Your very welcome Baby girl"

Clarke smiled into her embrace with her daughter loving how cuddly Olivia was in the mornings. She was cuddly in general but in the mornings she would be more likely to sit with her for hours just cuddling, she knew it was probably to do with her having to go to nursery and not wanting to leave her, but still she enjoyed feeling so loved. Looking over at Lexa and Oscar she smiled seeing the two hugging as they pulled apart Oscar looked over at her a massive smile spreading across his face as she looked down she noticed the two were exchanging a look she watched as they both opened their mouths and spoke at the same time

"Swap Mommies" They let out smiling and giggling as they let go of their respective Mommies, turning they both ran quickly past each other and jumped into hugs making Clarke and Lexa (And unseen by them, Charlotte) laugh at the action. They both wrapped their arms around their respective Mommie's giving them a kiss before continuing to laugh. Olivia pulled back smiling at her Mama softly speaking, still giggling slightly as she spoke;

"Hi Mama"

"Hello Princess...you look very pretty...did you chose that dress?"

"I did Mama, and I chose my socks" Olivia pointed down at her socks smiling a toothy grin at her Mama "Me and Oscar wanted to match Mama"

"Matching is good, especially when you're a twin...me and Auntie Rae always used to wear something the same..."

"It makes me feel special"

"That's because you are special...the most special princess in the whole wide world"

"Your special too Mama...you're the bestest most special Mama in the whole wide...unverse..."

"You mean Universe?"

"Yeah...Universe Mama" Olivia responded letting out a dirty laugh as she looked at her Mama

"Thank you princess that means a whole lot to Mama"

"You're welcome"

"Are you ready to talk to the nice lady now?"

"Yes Mama"

"Good girl" Lexa smiled out as she leant forward placing a gentle kiss on Olivia's head as she looked over at her son who was hugging his Mommy tightly "Oz, my prince...are you ready to talk to Ms Fox?" Oscar shifted his head slightly against his Mommy's chest looking at his Mama he nodded his head smiling at his Mama "Ok then..." She started standing up and lifting Olivia up, electing a small laugh from her daughter, carrying Olivia over to the couch she sat down next to Clarke sitting down next to her. Placing Olivia on the floor, her daughter instantly stepped forward resting her hands on her Mama's thighs, looking up at her Mama waiting for her to say something "Oz, look at me for a second please" Oscar obliged quickly turning at looking at his Mama "Thank you...ok so when you're talking to Ms Fox, Me and Mommy aren't allowed to be in the room, but we'll be in the kitchen so you don't need to be scared or worried about anything, is that ok?"

"What if we get really scared Mama?"

"Then all you have to do is tell Ms Fox, and she'll call us in if you need us ok?"

The twins looked at each other silently seeing if the other was ready, when they nodded at each other softly they both looked back to their Mama and Mommy "Ok...we're ready" They said at the same time electing a smile on a single laugh from Lexa and Clarke.

"Ok then...Ms Fox do you have the consent form?" Lexa asked looking over at Ms Fox, who smiled at her before removing a piece of paper from her folder standing up and moving a little closer to Clarke and Lexa, handing Lexa the piece of paper and a pen.

"Here you are, if you could just sign where you see your names please"

"Sure" Lexa replied as she held the paper in front of her keeping the pen in her right hand, as Olivia stayed standing between her legs trying to read the consent form in her Mama's hands. Lexa noticed her daughter's actions smiling down at her she leant forward kissing the side of her daughter's head as she began reading the piece of paper, reading the piece of paper carefully she took in every word as Olivia shuffled backwards into her chest more, pushing herself into her Mama's chest a little more making her Mama smile even more. Reading through the whole form she pushed down the bubble of anger that was slowly beginning to rise inside her with every word she read, but having the twins so close to her somehow seemed to be pushing all of that anger to the side, she knew right now that she needed to be strong for them both and not show that she was terrified of what could happen. Finishing reading the consent form, she looked to Clarke handing the form to her wife having not seen anything in it that could prove problematic for them; it was just a standard consent form allowing Ms Fox to interview the twins without them present. She watched as Clarke read the form as well, taking her time to look over it just as Lexa had moments before. Once Clarke was finished she looked to Lexa nodding her head softly, confirming that she didn't have any problems with the form or anything that it said. Handing the pen to Clarke, Lexa watched as Clarke carefully placed the form on her knee carefully signing where her name was printed being careful not to break or rip the paper. She handed the form and pen over to Lexa, leaning the paper on the couch to her left she leant over, watched carefully by Olivia, she carefully signed over where her name was printed. As she finished signing it she looked at her daughter seeing the look of seeming excitement on her face, she was amused at the look she wasn't sure why her daughter was so interested in the paper she was holding. Smiling and laughing she handed the paper to her daughter motioning to Ms Fox, giving her a toothy grin Olivia took the paper and turned excitedly walking over to the lady her Mama motioned to, handing the paper to her before turning and running back over to her Mama hugging her again.

* * *

**Thirty Minutes Later-Wood's Living Room**

After Olivia had run back to her Mama, they spent a few more minutes talking over a few things that Clarke and Lexa both wanted to know. The twins then went into talking to their respective Mommie's talking about how and why they chose their clothes and how they wanted their hair done by their Mama after they'd talked to Ms Fox. Olivia told her Mama all about the dresses she was going to pick instead, along with the headband she wanted to wear before she remembered she wanted her hair braided. After a while Clarke and Lexa told the twin's they were going into the kitchen, giving them both a drink when they asked for one, they walked the twins back into the living room, explaining to them that it was time for them to talk to Ms Fox, seeing the slight sign of apprehension in the twins Ms Fox suggested they play with some toys as they talked, knowing this often worked to distract kids when talking to them, making it easier to talk to them and get a truthful answer. The mention of toys got the twins interest, they instantly ran over to their toy box opening it and getting out all the toys they wanted to play with, taking them over and placing them on the floor in front of Ms Fox, they then began explaining what toys were what. They had been doing that for the last fifthteen minutes at least, as they explained Ms Fox didn't stop them talking she just let them explain wanting them to talk freely and feel as comfortable as possible. Once she was sure they were comfortable enough with her for them to talk to her, she sat herself on the floor in front of them both and softly spoke;

"So I'm going to ask you both some questions now if that's ok?"

"Mama and Mommy said its ok, so we say the same" Oscar matter of factly answered continuing to play with his batman action figure, his favourite of all his figures.

"Ok then, so tell me a little bit about what you do everyday"

"Me and Olivia go to Nursery...Mama says that you have to learn everyday to be smart"

"She's right, do you like going to nursery?"

"Yes...I wanna be smart like Mama..."

"And Mommy too" Olivia added looking at her brother who nodded his head in agreement as he sweetly handed her a Superman figure to play with, seeing Olivia had dropped her Spiderman figure. Olivia smiled at him taking the Superman figure from her twin brother.

"Being smart is always good; do you enjoy what you learn at nursery?"

"Yeah, we learned how to write our names and a lot of words, and now we're learning loads about numbers"

"How do you find numbers? Are they easy to learn?"

"Sometimes, but sometimes their hard"

"But Mommy said that's because it's new for us" Olivia added sweetly smiling at her brother and at Ms Fox. "Maybe we'll get some cool glasses like Mama"

"Your Mama has cool glasses?"

"Yeah their so cool...they are red" Olivia explained to Ms Fox

"Red is our most favourite colour in the whole wide world" Oscar added looking up from his figure to Ms Fox smiling at her before looking back down at the figure in his hand. The excitement in their voices was clear for Ms Fox to hear.

"Red is a great colour, why does your Mama have red glasses?"

"Because she sees number all jumbled up and they make her confused, and they hurt her brain"

"How comes?"

"Because she can't see them normal, but the glasses make it all better"

"So neither of you have cool glasses like your Mama's?"

"No, Mommy said that if we still aren't good at numbers soon, then we'll go see the eye doctor and we might have to get some..."

"So they could help us like they help Mama" Olivia added smiling at her brother again

"That's good. Your Mommie's told me that Mama had to move out for a little while, how did that make you both feel?"

"I didn't like it...but then we got to go with Mama to her new partment and we got a new room with awesome stuff" Olivia quickly answered looking at Ms Fox smiling brightly up at her as she thought about the room she had when she stayed with her Mama

"But we missed Mama Loads, we like it when Mama is home"

"It's more fun then, because we get to give Mama Cuddles in the morning and we can tell Mama anything..."

"Without having to call Mama"

"Did you call your Mama a lot?"

"Nah uh, only at night time to say goodnight" Oscar answered first

"Or when I had a bad dream...Mommy would call Mama and she would tell me princess story's, so the bad dreams stay away"

"That must have been nice?"

"Yeah...Mama always makes the bad dreams go away"

"So are you both happy that your Mama has moved back home?"

"YES" They both loudly responded giggling at each other

"What about when Mama was gone, who did all the things Mama would normally do?"

"Mommy did them all" Oscar responded picking up his Hulk figure and making him pretend fight with his Batman figure

"Nobody else?"

"The bad man was here" Olivia let out dropping the Superman figure in her hand onto her floor, as she thought about the bad man, feeling his sister's sadness Oscar stopped playing placing his figures on the floor and scooting even closer to his sister wrapping his arm around

"It's ok Livy, the bad man's gone forever Mama said so...don't be upset Livy...Here" Picking up his Batman figure he held it in front of his sister "You can play with Batman, he's the best and he looks after everyone"

"Don't like the bad man" Olivia added pouting sadly at her brother.

"Why don't you like the bad man?" Ms Fox asks, seeing the sadness on Olivia's face and wondering why.

"Because he's bad...and he was mean to Mama"

"He was? When was this?"

"Ages ago...I don't remember days..." Olivia stated looking at brother and laughing softly as he crashed his Hulk figure into the Batman one she was holding "Mama says that's normal though...cause I'm only little and I can't remember a lot"

"Your Mama's right...but you remember the bad man?"

"Yeah, because he was mean to Mama...and he tried to do Mama's things"

"And what things are they?"

"He helped us get ready whilst Mommy made breakfast, and put us in bed, and cuddled with Mommy...those are Mama's things not his"

"And you didn't like that?"

"No, I like Mama doing Mama's things"

"And who does Mama's things now?"

"Mama does...and Mama does our hair as well"

"Yeah and nobody does it like Mama does...not even Mommy" Oscar sweetly added smiling brightly as he thinks about his Mama doing his hair.

"So Mama does your hair better...what does Mommy do better?"

"Mommy helps us get dressed and look SUPER smart, and Mommy's cooking is the BEST...better than Mama's" Oscar quickly answered, laughing softly as he went back to his action figures

"Yeah Mommy's good is the best..." Olivia added giggling at her brother "And sometimes if we're really good and promise to be careful, Mommy lets us help her cook"

"She does?"

"Yeah but we can't use the sharp knives, or touch stuff without asking Mommy because it could be hot"

"And that would hurt us...and Mommy doesn't want that" Oscar added as his sister finished talking

"What about the bad man? Does he come here anymore?"

"No, Mama said he's gone forever and that he won't come back anymore"

"And you believe your Mama?"

"Yeah, Mama doesn't lie...she says it's bad and naughty to lie"

"It is...so when the bad man was here, did he ever hurt either of you?"

"No...Mama wouldn't let him...and Mommy wouldn't either...but he gave Livy bad medicine by accident"

"What Medicine?"

"Livy can't have strawberries because their bad for her and they make her sick, right Livy?"

"Yeah, they make me feel really bad, so I can't have any of them..but Oscar has strawberry medicine and the bad man gave me that medicine, but it's ok because Mama and Mommy made me all better and took away all the strawberries" Olivia thoroughly explained looking at Ms Fox, smiling as she finished talking.

"Do you think the bad man wanted you to get sick?"

"No, he's just bad because he was doing Mama's things but not because he hurts people...Mama says there different things" Ms Fox watched the twins talking, she could see they didn't like the bad man, who she knew was Roan, she could see it wasn't due to an insane fear. She decided that she didn't need to question them on that anymore, not wanting to make them uncomfortable.

"Ok, we won't talk about the bad man anymore ok?"

"Thank You" The twins responded at the same time. "Do you have more questions?"

"I do, can I keep asking my questions? Is that ok?"

"Yeah" The twins responded at the same time

"Thank You...When you do something bad, how does Mommy and Mama punish you?"

Olivia and Oscar both looked at her not quite sure what the word 'punish' meant, Oscar looked at Olivia his face just like hers, was a picture of confusion. Taking a sharp short breath in, he turned and ran into the kitchen, leaving his sister in the living room. He was gone for about a minute before he came running back in stopping in front of his sister he spoke "Mama said it's what happens when you do something wrong?"

"Your Mama is right, so what happens when your bad?"

"Me and Olivia get put on the naughty step, we have to sit there for a minute for every year old we are"

"That's FOUR" Olivia let out holding up her hand and showing Ms Fox four fingers as she smiled.

"Yea...and we have to sit on the naughty step until time is finished and Mama or Mom says we can move..."

"And then Mama or Mommy tells us why we had to sit there..."

"Have either of you been spanked for being naughty?"

"Nuh uh, we get told of...or our toys get taken and we have to be really good..."

"Or all our toys would get taken away for a long long time"

"And what would you be punished for?" Ms Fox asked, she had to admit to herself she wasn't seeing any signs that the accusations were right, though she need to talk to Clarke and Lexa about the medicine incident, the twins seemed very intelligent and happy in their lives and with their Mama and Mommy. Smiling at the twins she waited for their answer;

"Different things, when we don't listen...or if I hit Oscar too hard" Olivia answered looking at her brother almost apologetically

"Sometimes we play a little too real Mama warns us...but sometimes we don't listen and then we have to sit on the naughty step"

"But no spanking...Mama says that hitting is bad"

"Your Mama is right, hitting is bad" Ms Fox sweetly responded smiling at the twins "What about food? Are you allowed to everything?"

"No...we have breakfast and lunch at Nursery and then dinner when we come home" Oscar confidently answered smiling at Ms Fox

"If we're good then we can have an ice cream or a snack...apples are my favourite" Olivia added on her attention on the floor and the action figure she still had in her hand.

"My favourite is yoghurt...but Mommy doesn't let me have too many"

"No because they fill you up" Olivia retorted to her brother who nodded his head releasing a giggle as he looked back to his action figure. "Do you have loads more questions?"

"Only one more...and that question is, what is the one thing that Mommy and Mama do that you really wish they didn't and would never do again?" Ms Fox softly asked, looking up she looked at the twins trying to read their faces, she noticed that they both had a small ting of sadness on their face, also seeing hesitation on their face she softly added "It's ok, you can tell me anything in the world...and if you don't want me to tell your Mommy and Mama then I won't...it'll just be between us three"

Oscar looked at Olivia seeing the hesitation on his sister's face he moved closer to her comfortingly taking hold of her hand before he softly spoke "We don't like it when Mama or Mommy leaves….we miss them loads and sometimes we forget if their coming back"

"Well that's ok, see sometimes when you really love someone you miss them all the time, even if their in the same house and they leave for a minute you can miss them. But as you get older it'll get easier and if you tell your Mama and Mommy then I'm sure they can help you loads….but I'll let you tell them ok?" Oscar and Olivia nodded their heads, their looks of hesitation gone and replaced with smiles at Ms Fox's response "So we're all done with the questions now"

"Can I get Mommy and Mama?" Olivia sweetly asked

"Of course you can"

"Yay" She let out standing up and taking off, running fast towards the kitchen disappearing out of sight. Oscar giggled at his twins actions, standing himself so he was ready to run at his Mommy. The seconds passed and then Olivia reappeared dragging her Mama into the living room by her hand giggling happily as she did so. Oscar watched as his Mommy walked into the room slightly behind his Mama, giggling loudly he took off running and jumping up, luckily his Mommy saw him coming and scooped him out of the air lifting him up onto her chest.

"This troublemaker said your all done with your questions, is that right?" Lexa asked as she gently pulled her daughter towards her until she hit her legs, leaning down and wrapping her arms around Olivia as she kept her eyes on Ms Fox

"Yes, I am. I just need to speak with you and Clarke for a moment before I leave"

"Ok…." Before Lexa could get out another word Olivia wriggled in her arms and loudly said

"I'm not a troublemaker Mama"

"Yes you are….your Princess Troublemaker…" Lexa responded jokingly as she tickled her daughter making Olivia jump forward and run to the couch jumping onto it for safety "Lucky escape princess" Lexa laughed out before looking at Ms Fox "We can talk in the kitchen…." She said motioning to the kitchen as Clarke placed Oscar on the ground watching him run over to his sister and jump on the couch sitting next to her as he giggled as well. "No going near the door babies ok?"

"Ok Mama" The twins responded at the same time.

"We'll be back in a minute" Clarke added as her and Lexa walked behind Ms Fox into the kitchen

"Ok Mommy" The twins again responded at the same time watching their Mommie's disappear.

Once in the kitchen Clarke and Lexa noticed Ms Fox standing at the kitchen island writing into her pad vigorously word after word flowing from her pen until she stopped completely and turned to them, her face serious but soft and welcoming as the same time, "I need to ask about an incident that the twins mentioned"

"What incident?"

"An incident involving medicine and Roan"

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooooo Clarke and Lexa have to explain to Ms Fox exactly about what happened when Roan gave Olivia Strawberry Medicine. Will they tell the truth, or will they risk lying in hopes of protecting themselves and keeping their kids...Next chapter will include the answer of course lol along with some Raven and Lexa twin time...aaannnnnddd some Raven and Octavia time (not alot but some).. Plus the chapter will end with a small glimpse into drama that will unfold at the end of Chapter 26 But anyways, hope you all enjoyed the chapter, and as always feel free to leave a comment, all I ask is that when commenting please remember I have feelings as well just because its words on a page doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, sooo yeah please be respectful and until next time Peeps and Peepettes, Stay safe and Keep Fanficing ...


	25. Strawberry Flavoured Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, Apologies for the delay in posting this, I keep forgetting I need to upload on here I'm so used to just posting on one site. Anyways, Thank you all for the comments, kudos and bookmarks I appreciate you all taking the time to read these chapters :-) 
> 
> I hope you all enjoy it :-)

**Chapter 25-Strawberry Flavoured Truth**

**Woods House 08:14am**

Lexa felt a whole bunch of emotions rush through her body, as the emotions swirled around inside her one pushed its way to the surface and that was worry. Worry that her and Clarke might lose the kids if they told Ms Fox the truth, but if they lied they could lose the twins as well, she didn't know what to do, lies had been the reason she'd missed a year of living with Clarke and the Twins, and she'd be damned if she was going to any longer without them. She tries to think of what could happen either way, and the more the thinks about telling the truth the more she thinks about them losing the twins. The decision continued to whirl around in her mind until everything became decided and clear for her as she heard Clarke's voice fill the room, making Lexa turn her attention to her wife turning and watching as she spoke;

"That was before the incident outside, the one where Lexa pushed him back" Clarke began explaining looking over at Lexa for a second, reaching down and taking her hand at the same time. Lexa watched as Clarke continued to explain "Before he told me he loved me, he used to help me out around the house, fixing things when they were breaking or already broken, the day you're talking about the twins were sick, Lexa was here and we were looking after the twins, we left them sleeping to talk for a bit, then Roan came into the house using spare keys he'd taken without my knowledge. He scared Oscar a little but we calmed him down and he even spoke to Roan and forgave him, we'd put Olivia upstairs in her bed to sleep a little longer. I told Roan it wasn't ok to let himself in and after he apologised to me and Lexa, and Oscar he said he just came to fix the leaking tap in my bathroom. I told him he could fix it but to be quiet." Clarke paused for a second trying to find the right way to word the sentence she was about to say so that her and Lexa didn't sound like terrible parents. "After Roan finished we realised Olivia was having an allergic reaction, she's allergic to Strawberries and Oscars medicine is Strawberry flavoured, we have her her epi pen and got my mom, who's a doctor, she told us Olivia was fine. So we didn't take her to hospital, Olivia eventually told us Roan gave us the medicine, that's what lead to our confrontation the last time I saw him."

"Do you believe he intended to harm Olivia?"

"No he's not the kind of person that would hurt children, I don't believe he is. He told me he thought Oscar had the allergy. Either way he shouldn't have given my child medicine without my permission. I told him what has happened and he was apologetic"

"Was that the end of your confrontation?"

"No…he started telling me how much he loved me and wanted to be with me. He seemed to think that I loved him back and that Lexa was the reason me and him weren't together. He even accused Lexa of giving Olivia the Strawberry medicine to make her sick just so she could frame him"

"And this is the last time you saw him correct?"

"Yes. I haven't seen him again since, he came here and banged on the door a few weeks ago but I went into the den and stayed in there until Lexa came back. Olivia was scared and letting him in wasn't an option when he sounded that angry"

"That's understandable, and you've had no contact with him since then?"

"None, I haven't heard from him or been in contact with him"

"Ok. And your mother didn't find anything other than the reaction wrong with Olivia?"

"No, she was just a little scared, my mom told us to keep her hydrated and make sure she feels calm and safe. So we did, and she hasn't had any problems since….right Lex"

Lexa blinked a few times having heard her name, looking to Clarke she squeezed the blondes hand before wetting her lips and speaking "Right, she's been fine since, she's a little scared of anything red. She thinks anything red is strawberries, I explained that isn't the case. But once you explain it to her she's fine and doesn't really worry about it."

"She tends to believe Lexa more than me, we both think that's because Lex is allergic to Strawberries as well"

"That does sound accurate, children sometimes find it easier to comprehend things is they have something that connects them to the information and makes it easier to believe, and you both being allergic could be all she needs to know to believe it"

"Can I ask….is this going to cause a problem for us? With the complaint I mean?" Clarke nervously asked, she was wasn't sure the truth was the best option but she'd been around and heard so many lies over the last year she was down with lying.

"Oh No not by any means Clarke…in fact it works in your favour, being honest is all we ask, every parent is different and reacts to situations differently….some panic and some react it's all a case of us being as informed as we can be to judge this claim."

"So us not taking her to the hospital won't be an issue?"

"It would if not for the fact that you called in your mother who by all accounts is a fully licensed and competent doctor"

"She is, you can check her out, her name is Abigail Griffin"

"I appreciate that Clarke, but honestly you did the right thing telling me the truth. You trust your mother more than any other doctor and I'm sure Olivia was more comfortable with her Grandma than with a strange doctor"

"She was, she loves her Grandma, and she doesn't really like hospitals….we don't know why really but she just never has"

"Not a lot of children like hospitals, it's all the white walls and the grumpy adults I believe…but anyhow I believe I have everything I need to respond to this claim."

"When will we know the outcome"

"Officially in about three to four days, unofficially I can tell you I'm recommending the case be dismissed. I believe that the claim was completely false and unfounded. And personally, I believe that whoever made this claim may have some personal issue with you, that is completely just my opinion so please don't take it to heart. Just the claim was specifically aimed at your parenting and mentioned your relationship which very rarely gets brought into any claim"

"Thank you for your honestly…..Will we receive a copy of the claim?" Lexa asked now she was filled with a massive sense of relied knowing the case was more than likely being dropped. But now she was feeling the anger burning inside her, making her want to find out who made that claim against her and Clarke

"You won't receive a audio copy but you will receive a transcript of the call itself along with my personal opinion and the outcome of our interview and my interview with the twins. Then my supervisors decision, and the stages that will follow the result of the investigation"

"So we'll be able to see what was said during the complaint?" Lexa asked needing to clarify before Ms Fox left.

"That's correct, along with all relevant paperwork and information needed"

Before Ms Fox could say another word Olivia came running into the kitchen, stopping in front of her Mama she looked up at her innocently "Mama can we play now?"

"In a minute princess, I promise"

"Ok Mama…..can I stay with you?"

Lexa wasn't sure what she was meant to say, she didn't want to upset her daughter but she also wasn't sure whether or not Ms Fox was done talking to them. "Ummm..." She looked to Ms Fox unsure.

"It's fine I've got to get going, I have another meeting to get to. Thank you both for your time, and I'll be in contact in some form very soon. Thank you once again and my apologies for any interruptions"

"And thank you for telling us your views on the outcome of the claim. It means a lot to us to know what your views are, it'll help us keep calm and stop our minds running away with themselves"

"No problem, I'm just doing my job"

"Thank you" Clarke and Lexa said at the same time, just as Olivia moved closer to her Mama leaning herself against her Mama's legs her hands coming to gently grip onto the denim material of her Mama's jeans. As Lexa looked down at their daughter, Clarke smiled and continued speaking "I'll walk you out" She smiled out motioning to the door as she looked at Ms Fox.

"Thank you that's very kind" Clarke watched as Ms Fox checked she had everything and walked back into the living room. Once Ms Fox had her bag and all her items she held her hand out to Lexa smiling "It was nice to meet you, despite the circumstances"

"Nice to meet you too" Lexa responded reaching her hand forward and shaking Ms Fox's hand. As Clarke walked Ms Fox out of the kitchen through to the living room and to the front door, Lexa turned her attention back to her daughter, seeing Olivia looking up at her smiling softly "Are you happy Princess?" Olivia smiled and nodded her head at the question. Lexa smiled at the small action "oh yeah, how come?"

"Cause I think I got all the questions right Mama"

"I think you did as well" Lexa smiled not wanting to ruin the innocent way her daughter saw the questions she'd been asked by Ms Fox. Instead she just let her daughter be happy and innocent. "What would you like to do today?" Lexa softly asked smiling at her daughter as she gripped onto the back of her Mama's jeans and looked up at her giving her a toothy grin and a soft giggle.

"Can we go to the park Mama?"

"I think we can arrange that"

"Can Auntie Raven and Octavia come too?"

"I'm not sure but I'll ask them both ok?"

"Ok Mama…..thank you"

"Hey, I've got an idea…..wanna hear it?"

"Yeah" Olivia excitedly let out her arms shooting up in the air as she smiled at her Mama

"How about me and you call Auntie Raven now, then we can see how she is and if she wants to come to the park, how does that sound?"

"That sounds awesome Mama….call her now Mama quickly"

"My phones upstairs princess, you wanna go get it for me?"

"Where is it Mama?"

"It's on my side of me and Mommy's bed"

"Ok Mama I'll get it quickly" Olivia let out turning around and running through the living room shouting something at her brother before she quickly disappeared up the stairs and towards her Mama and Mommy's bedroom. Lexa stayed where she was listening out for her daughter's footsteps and soon enough she heard them along with a small reminder from Clarke for her not to run down the stairs. She heard the footsteps slow down and come to a stop then she heard Olivia's voice softly say "Sorry Mommy" to which Clarke quickly responded 'it's ok princess'. Within seconds of Clarke response to her Olivia came rushing back into the kitchen holding her Mama's phone, Lexa had to admit she was impressed that her daughter knew which phone was hers. Olivia walked upto her holding the phone in the air between them breathlessly saying "Here you go Mama"

"Thank you princess, how did you know which one was Mama's?"

"Because I remembered Mama"

"Ok. Good girl….Let's call Auntie Raven then"

"YAY"

Lexa smiled at her daughter before holding her phone in both hands and leaning on the kitchen island looking down at Olivia she noticed her daughter watching her every move "Wanna sit up here while I talk to Auntie Rae?" Olivia nodded her head quickly throwing her arms up in the air in her Mama's direction. Lexa smiled placing the phone on the island counter top, leaning down and lifting her daughter up onto the counter top she softly reminded "Remember the rule?"

"Yeah I do Mama…..No wriggling and I have to be really careful or I could fall and that would hurt loads"

"Exactly princess…good girl" Lexa smiled leaning forward gently placing a kiss on her daughter forehead. Leaning forward resting her forearms on the counter, Lexa felt Olivia wrap her right arm around her neck leaning into her at the same time, smiling to herself at her daughter's actions she went into her recent calls and pressing on Ravens name which was first on the list, she placed the phone on speaker so Olivia could hear what was being said. The phone rang twice before the call was picked up, and Raven's voice filled the room:

"Hello"

"Hey little sis"

"Ha ha really funny Lex" Raven let out with a small laugh "How can I help?"

"Well I have someone that wants to ask you something"

"Oh yeah and who might that be?" Raven asked she knew fully well that it was either Oscar or Olivia.

"ITS ME" Olivia shouted down the line instantly realising her voice was louder than it should be inside "Sorry Mommy" She loudly said smiling when she heard her Mommy shout back 'Its ok Princess'

"Who's me?"

"It's Olivia Auntie Rae"

"No way that's my favourite niece"

"It is Auntie Raven I promise" Olivia let out as a laugh filled her chest causing her head to vibrate softly against her Mama's shoulder

"Ok then, I believe you"

"Good, how are you Auntie Rae?"

"I'm good thank you Livy, how are you?"

"I'm great Auntie Rae, me and Oscar spoke to the pretty lady, we thought she was scary but she wasn't"

"What Pretty lady?"

"The Ms Fox pretty lady, she asked us questions about Mama and Mommy, but it wasn't scary"

"And is this pretty lady gone?"

"Yeah. Isn't she Mama?"

"Yeah baby she is, I'll explain everything to you later Rae" Lexa softly said looking at the phone as she placed a kiss on the top of her daughter's head making Olivia smile

"Ok. So why is my favourite niece calling her favourite Auntie then?"

"Can I ask Mama?" Olivia asked looking up at her Mama, Lexa nodded her head at the question making Olivia smile before she turned back to the phone concentrating on what she was about to say. "Me and Oscar don't have any nursery Rae and Mama said we can go to the park to play on the swings and slide, and I asked Mama if you and Auntie Octavia can come and Mama said I have to ask you, so we called you"

"So you want me to come to the park with you?"

"Yes please…..and Auntie Octavia…..OH and Zachary please Auntie Rae"

"Ok well I don't know about Auntie Octavia and Zachary but I would love to come…as long as your Mama comes to pick me up like a good big sister would"

"Yes….Go Now Mama….Go get Auntie Raven…" Olivia excitedly let out wriggling on the island counter she was sitting on, looking at her Mama she waited for a response.

Lexa couldn't suppress the smile from breaking out onto her face, letting the smile completely fill her face she leant forward kissing her daughter on the forehead, pulling back and looking at her daughter she softly said "Ok, I'll go pick up Auntie Rae and then I'll call Auntie Octavia and see if she and Zachary can come to the park with us ok?"

"Ok Mama…..Thank you Mama…Thank you Auntie Rae"

"Your welcome" Raven and Lexa responded at the same time making Olivia burst into laughter at the joint sentence. As She giggled softly against her Mama's shoulder, removing herself from her Mama she softly spoke again;

"See you soon Auntie Raven…" Olivia didn't wait or a response from her Auntie Raven, instead she gently tugged at her Mama's top. "Mama can you help me down please?"

"Of course I can Princess.." Lexa smiled out seeing the excitement and happiness on her daughters face. Holding her hands in the air she smiled at Olivia lifting her daughter into the air and placing her on the floor carefully. "You go tell your brother about the park and I'll get my shoes and keys then go get Auntie Rae…" Lexa laughed as Olivia let out a small 'Yay' before taking off running towards the living room to tell her brother everything that had just happened "Your not gonna believe what's happened here this morning" Lexa began explaining before beginning to explain to her sister everything that had happened that morning with Ms Fox.

* * *

**9:00am Monday Morning-Raven's Apartment**

Lexa had partially explained to Raven about Ms Fox and how she'd turned up at the house to investigate the claim/complaint made against her and Clarke. She went on to explain in small detail what Ms Fox had said and done, she didn't have much time to explain when Clarke walked into the kitchen asking why she was going to Raven's. It seemed that in all her excitement Olivia hadn't explained to her Mommy what the plan was properly. Lexa told Raven she'd see her soon and to hurry up getting dressed, Raven just laughed and hung up the phone leaving Lexa free to talk to Clarke, she quickly explained to her wife what was going on, getting and apology from Clarke before reinforcing that Clarke didn't need to apologise for the miscommunication. She got herself ready to leave getting her shoes on and grabbing her keys before saying a quick goodbye to the twins making sure they both knew she was only going to get their Auntie Raven. They were both fine with it, not freaking out or thinking their Mama wasn't coming back, Lexa kissed them both before standing up and moving to Clarke kissing and hugging her gently before heading to the door, as she walked through it the twins walked up to the door not stepping over the threshold knowing they weren't allowed without their Mama and Mommy's permission. As Lexa walked to her car she laughed softly as the twins shouted goodbyes and waved like crazy with an equally amused Clarke standing behind them. Once she finally got into her car she started it up reversing out the drive and driving in the direction of her sisters (formerly her) apartment, waving through her window at the twins and Clarke until they were out of her sight line.

That had been about 40 minutes ago and now Lexa had just reached her sisters apartment, she'd decided to call Octavia when she was driving over to Raven's. Her and Octavia got chatting and ending up talking for twenty minutes before Zachary began crying for his Mommy having woken up from his morning nap. They both agreed to continue talking later, as soon as Lexa had brought up the subject of everyone spending the whole day together Octavia had agreed, before she quickly asked if Raven was ok with that, when Lexa told her Raven was ok with it she could hear the happiness fill Octavia's voice as they continued to talk. It made her smile at the old Octavia that was beginning to shine through again, she hadn't heard that in a while. Just as they ended the call so Octavia could attend to Zachary, Lexa pulled into the familiar car park, driving to the floor she needed she found a space next to Raven's Rover, the car that was identical to hers except for the colouring, smiling she parked the car before turning the engine off and exiting the car heading to the apartment saying a small hello to people as she passed them. Over the months she'd gotten to know a few of the neighbours, most of whom were people who had been in the same situation as she'd been, some were in worse situations and others had not a care in the world, but each and every one of them were nice people that got along with everyone. Reaching the apartment door she gently knocked on it with her knuckles hearing her sister shout out something before she heard a heavy footsteps coming towards the door before there was a shuffle and the sound of the door unlocking. As the door opened slowly Lexa laughed as her eyes fell on the image of her sister brushing her teeth as Raven realised who it was her shoulders relaxed a little and with a mouthful of toothpaste so said:

"Oh it's you"

"Wow little sis, nice to see you too"

Raven laughed at her sister motioning for her to enter the apartment closing the door she stepped forward hugging her sister as she removed the toothbrush from her mouth. Pulling out of the hug she softly spoke, careful not to spit toothpaste over her sister knowing how much she hated that. "Sorry, give me two seconds I'll be back"

"Sure"

Raven smirked at her twin before spinning on her heels and removing off towards the bathroom. Laughing softly Lexa shook her head before walking over into the kitchen and grabbing herself a bottle of water from the fridge. Just as she finished Raven walked into the kitchen smiling at her before getting herself a bottle of water. Without a word to each other they walked into the living room sitting down next to each other on the couch, quietly they sipped their waters both remaining quiet for a minute until Raven spoke:

"So you never said what happens now with CPS"

"Well Ms Fox said she's gonna recommend that the complaint be dropped, she spoke to me, Clarke and the twins and said she believes the complaint was unfounded. She's gonna tell her superior the same along with filing her report which will say the same. She said that it'll just be against our names in case a future claim is made, but other than that she also believes nothing will come of it."

"That's great Lex, did she say who made the complaint?"

"No, the complaint was made anonymously. She said that once she files the paperwork and her superior decides what decision to make, then we'll be sent a copy of all the paperwork along with the transcript of the call that was made. So maybe that will give me something to work off, if not then I'll just have to move on. But the main thing is that the twins aren't going anywhere and it looks like the whole case will be dropped"

"I still don't understand why it was taken so seriously, I mean it was only one complaint and a weak one from what I can gather"

"Who knows?"

"You can't lie to me remember dummy…" Raven gently responded nudging Lexa softly with her left shoulder "This Ms Fox, did she mention what happened with Mom and Titus?"

"She didn't mention it in detail but she mentioned it yeah"

"What exactly did she say?"

"She said that the only reason that it was taken so seriously other than the comments made in the complaint is because of the file that was connected to my name."

"Well that's our Mom for ya, still fucking with our lives even when she isn't involved in our lives or even in the same state"

"Yeah, but she gets the happy ever after we never did huh?"

"Yep…." Raven paused for a second as the thoughts of their mother filled her head, instantly making her angry, it'd be nearly two years since her and Lexa had seen TJ and Costia, and it was all because they didn't want their mother near their children. Shaking her head softly ignoring the rising anger and the painful memories she softly smiled at her sister before softly continuing "Surely you can't be judged because our Mom was a complete wreck of a mother and an alcoholic to boot"

"It doesn't work against me or for me, its neither. But because she has a history we're more likely to follow in her footsteps…well that's what the system says and thinks anyway"

"That's just stupid, we shouldn't be judged for our mother's mistakes and bad parenting"

"I know, but we are and we have to deal with it….just remember if you get a call from them, talk to them politely and don't go all Reyes on them" Lexa softly laughed at the end of her sentence, since they had dropped the last part of their hyphened name (Reyes), they had started using the word Reyes instead of crazy, referring to their mother and the way she would change demeanours when she was and wasn't drunk almost like she was a crazy woman.

"I wouldn't do that to you sis you know that"

"I know Rae"

"Good ya goof…" Raven playfully responded gently nudging her sister's shoulder. After a moment of silence she continued "So how did Clarke take it?"

"She took it well, at first she cried, I think that was more the fear of the kids being taken. Then she seemed to be fine, she even explained everything about Roan and that whole mess of a situation…minus the Nia lying her ass off part of course"

"Of course, so they don't know about Octavia's involvement in that either?"

"No, I left you and Octavia out of it, well apart from the parts your aware of anyway."

"Cool Thanks…how are you dealing with it?"

"I'm dealing….as good as can be I suppose"

"No resentment or anger at all?"

Lexa looked at her sister contemplating lying through her teeth, but she knew it was pointless Raven was right, there was only one person in this world that she couldn't lie to and that was her twin sister. The one person that had her back no matter what, and believed her without a second thought. "I'm beyond angry but I'm burying it ok?"

"No it's not ok Lex, you can't bury your feelings…why would you want to anyway?" When Lexa didn't say a word she instantly knew the answer "You don't want to rock the now steady boat"

"Everything is just getting back to normal, I have my family back, I'm living back in my house with my wife and kids. If I really let go and say everything I want to, I don't know if we can come back from it….I remember waking up and watching Mom and Dad argue when they were both plastered, I remember jumping in front of Mom's hand or Dad's fist to stop you getting hit. I remember all of that, and I know I could never hit Clarke and I know she'd never hit me…I don't want the twins to have to hear us arguing, I just want to be a normal family for once"

"So, you take the burden of all your feelings yourself?"

"Yes. So, what I'm angry and resentful but what is saying it really gonna do Rae. It'll upset Clarke and make things weird between us again. And I'm not willing to lose that all again. I can't go back to the last year, I can't redo all of that again"

"But carrying this isn't fair on you Lex…And this isn't just about the complaint is it?...you don't even need to answer that cause I know it's about more than that….you've been holding this in for over a year Lexa, and granted you didn't have to see her that much at the beginning but now you have to see her everyday, sooner or later it's going to explode Lexa"

"I know ok….but I just want a little bit more normality until I really tell her everything I'm feeling"

Raven softly smiled at her sister, taking a breath and deciding to let the subject drop for her sister's sake she could tell the CPS complaint was weighing on her twin sister's minds. "Just promise me that if it gets too much for you, then you come to me and tell me, we can talk it out and I can help you deal with it the correct way…"

"Ok"

"Promise me Alexa"

"Ok ok, geez no need to full name me…. I promise Raven, if it all gets too much for me and I feel like I'm gonna go REYES then you're the first person I'll come to ok?"

"Good…" Raven smiled wrapping her left arm around Lexa's shoulders and pulling her into her hugging her sister tightly, Lexa smiled at the gesture and wrapped her arms around her sister holding onto her equally as tight. "I love you Lex…I've got you no matter what, don't forget that ok?"

"I won't I promise….I love you too…and I've got you as well no matter what…" Lexa responded, she could have made some comment about Raven being a sap or over emotional but she knew how genuine her sisters words were at this moment in time. She didn't want to ruin this moment by making some joke that wasn't needed right now.

* * *

**The Woods House**

Clarke was sat on the couch looking through her phone as the twins played in front of her. Their attention still completely on the selection of action figures they had, from wrestling figures to every superhero figure you could imagine. Clarke giggled softly as she listened to the interesting conversation between the twins as they talked about who would save the princess at the end. Going through her pictures from the weekend just gone she smiled at the picture she'd taken of Lexa and the twins playing in the garden on Sunday with her parents laughing softly in the background. Lexa had Olivia on her shoulders holding her firmly in place whilst Oscar tried to save his twin from their Mama. She remembered how Oscar had begun tickling the back of Lexa's knee making all the adults laugh at the interesting tactic, Lexa did as she always did and went along with it falling to her knees letting her daughter fall safely onto the floor, before dramatically falling onto the floor, within a second Oscar had jumped on top of his Mama holding her down while Olivia ran to her castle at the end of the garden. She loved looking at this picture it was everything she loved about having her wife back all rolled into one picture, the reason was simply happiness, not just her own but the twins' as well, along with her parents as well who were more than happy that Lexa was back where she belonged. As she got lost in the image in front of her and how it made her feel she felt the couch dip causing her to look in the direction the feeling came from seeing Olivia and Oscar sitting on her left side, both of them were looking at her questioningly;

"What are you looking at Mommy?" Olivia quickly asked as her and her brother raised onto their knees trying to peak at whatever was on their Mommy's phone

"It's picture of you two playing with Mama yesterday"

"That was loads of fun Mommy" Oscar sweetly responded "Can we see Mommy? Please"

"Of course, you can, but how about one of you comes this side then we can all look at the same time" Without a word, Oscar looked at his twin before climbing down from the couch and taking a few steps around his Mommy's legs. Climbing back up onto the couch so he was sitting on his Mommy's right side, snuggling into his Mommy's side at the same time Olivia did the same thing on their Mommy's left side "Perfect, can you both see now?" Clarke softly asked, she secretly wanted the twins to always sit like this, she loved being squashed in between them, their little hands clinging lightly onto her forearm. They both nodded their head at her question "Can you both see Grandma and Grandpa in the background?"

"Yeah" They responded in unison

"And then theirs you Oscar…and you Olivia….and then Mama of course…"

"Mama was the dragon"

"I know she was, and you both defeated the dragon and the princess was safe again, isn't that right?"

"Yeah Mommy" They again responded in unison, their timing always amazed Clarke just like it amazed her when Lexa and Raven would do the same thing. As she held back the small laugh she usually released, Clarke felt a small tug on her left sleeve, looking down at Olivia she waited for her daughter to speak "Can we see more pictures Mommy?"

"Of course, princess, you want to swipe the screen, one picture each or would you both like Mommy to do it?"

"You do it please Mommy" Oscar quickly answered getting a nod of confirmation from his sister as he spoke

"Ok then…you can both help Mommy pick a picture to put on Facebook for the whole world to see" Clarke smiled and laughed softly when she felt both the twins wriggle in excitement against her arms. She knew they had no idea what Facebook was but she loved how excited they got when they were allowed to pick something, even if they didn't know what it was for. Swiping to her right she slowly went through all the pictures that she'd taken over the weekend, there were mainly pictures of Lexa and the twins or the twins and her parents or Lexa and her parents or just pictures of the twins doing something adorably cute.

Continuing through the pictures she came across pictures from Saturday night and her date with Lexa. The first she came across was of Lexa holding her phone out in front of them both, taking a selfie as Clarke tried to get the phone back from her, her face was filled with laughter and playfulness something only Lexa could manage to get on her face when annoying her in a small way. She felt the twins giggle against her at the picture, holding her finger down on the picture she laughed when a small video of her saying Lexa's name and Lexa playfully saying hers back played out. Scrolling again to the right she smiled as a picture of her and Lexa in front of the doors of the cinema screen came up, it was a picture a gentleman had offered to take for them after seeing them taking a selfie, she hadn't had a chance to respond as Lexa instantly accepted the gentlemen's offer and handed the phone over to him. Wrapping her arms around Clarke and not allowing her to complain, Clarke had turned herself in Lexa's arms so they were side to side, smiling at the camera as the man took the picture. As she looked at the picture she was intrigued to see what the camera had captured when the picture was taken, holding her thumb down on the picture she smiled as the image of her pouting at Lexa played out and Lexa leant into her capturing her lips with her own, as her hands came up to cup Lexa's cheeks the image played out for a second before it stopped completely. Hearing the twins giggle even more, knowing it was about the display of affection between their Mommies. Continuing to swipe through the images she continued through pictures of her and Lexa from their date night, most of them were just selfies of them doing something, the final one she came across was of her and Lexa outside the restaurant Lexa had taken her to, they had managed to get the perfect picture of them both, neither of them looking too big or too small, and the logo of the restaurant was clearly visible in the background, along with the windows of the restaurant entrance. She continued on looking through the pictures with the twins, completely forgetting about finding a picture for Facebook just enjoying being reminded of some of the memories that came with the pictures, also enjoying the calm time she was getting with the twins as they too enjoyed looking at the pictures.

* * *

**Raven's Apartment-09:25am**

Lexa and Raven had just released each other from their hug moments ago when they both felt it was the right time to let go. They naturally fallen into a natural conversation as Lexa confirmed with her sister that she was fine with Octavia being around today, Raven reaffirmed that she was fine with it, and that her and Octavia had been taking a lot more over the last few days, they mainly talked about Zachary but soon enough they'd both begun to talk about their respective work and their day to the other, neither objecting to the words or the chance to talk to each other. That led to Raven texting her wife telling her to meet her and Lexa at her new apartment as it was nearer their house, they could all then drive to Clarke and Lexa's in two cars instead of three. As they finished talking about Octavia they both naturally fell into a conversation about the latest client they'd received and what they both thought the songs should be. They'd been deep in conversation as they both wrote lyrics out on a notepad when there was a small knock on the front door, Lexa looked at Raven raising her eyebrows softly, they both knew that the whole building was buzzer operated so nobody could get in unless they had a key or were buzzed in by someone. Standing up Raven walked to the door unlocking it and opening it her eyes falling on her wife and their crying son, his top was covered in juice as he cried out for his Mama, as Raven looked to her Octavia quickly spoke;

"I'm sorry, the lady on the ground floor let us in, his juice lid came off when I parked up and he hasn't stopped crying, I haven't got a spare shirt on me"

"Hey, it's ok baby boy…" Raven soothed holding her hands up for her son, who quickly moved forward letting his Mama pick him up, instantly clinging to her chest, rubbing circles on her back she bounced him gently like she knew he liked, trying to calm her son down. It worked as within a few seconds of the bouncing motion his cries stopped and he just clung to his Mama. Turning back to the door, Raven saw Octavia still standing there, "Come in O, you don't need to wait for an invite."

"Thanks" Octavia responded walking into the apartment, closing the door behind her placing the lock on like she knew Raven always did. "Have you got a spare top for him, I thought I packed one but I must have forgot"

"Um I think I might have one in the guest room"

"I'll go look, I'm sure we can find something for him to wear" Lexa responded standing herself up from the couch and walking over to Octavia hugging her sister in law "Hey O" She softly said before walking towards her sister and nephew, getting a small 'Hi Lex' back from Octavia as she did so. As she got closer to the two people in front of her, Zachary's head peaked around his eyes falling on Lexa, as they did his head lifted quickly and sharply;

"Smart Lexa" He let out his small voice conveying a small amount of shock, like he wasn't expecting to see her. Waving at her with one hand his arms shot out in her direction as she got closer to him. Laughing at the action, Raven watched as her sister took Zachary from her arms, she was fully expecting him to hug Lexa then come straight back to her, just like Lexa and Octavia were both expecting, they were all surprised when Zachary looked at Lexa and placed his hands on her cheeks and giggled softly saying "I go with you"

"Um…" Looking to Raven and Octavia for confirmation both women nodded at Lexa. "Sure…. you wanna pick out a shirt?" She softly asked as she carried her nephew to the guest room.

"Yes, wash juice off"

"Don't worry we'll get all the yucky juice off before we put on your BRAND NEW shirt" Lexa's words made Zachary giggle as they walked out of Octavia and Raven's sight. Both women looked at each other smiling softly at their son's sweet actions and trustiness of his Auntie Lexa. They remained silent for a few moments before Raven took a deep breath and looked at Octavia, suddenly she realised how perfectly imperfect Octavia looked, she didn't even understand how that was possible, Octavia looked flustered and slightly dishevelled but she still looked perfectly put together like she'd spent hours choosing what to wear. Blinking a few times, she cleared her voice before speaking;

"Can I get you a drink or anything O?"

"No I'm ok…..thanks"

"No worries…." Raven remained silent before moving forward and sitting down, the silence between them was weird considering they'd spoken on the phone numerous times. Finally breaking the silence, she looked at Octavia and asked "Why is this so weird?"

Octavia let out a small laugh before she walked over and took a seat next to her wife smiling at her softly "I don't know, it shouldn't be, should it?"

"I don't think so"

"So how do we not make it weird?"

"I have no idea"

"Maybe we just talk?"

"Sounds good….so what do you want to talk about?"

Octavia let out a small laugh "I don't know" Her and Raven both softly laughed at the situation they were in "Are you looking forward to the park? …" Octavia asked with a sassy smirk on her face as she looked at her wife continuing "I know how much you love the swings"

"The swings are the best part of any trip to a park and I'm not ashamed of that fact"

"Oh of course not, I meant there's nothing a little shameful about a 24-year-old loving the swings"

"Exactly…." Raven responded turning more to face Octavia nudging her gently on the leg leaning into her a little more "See you get me…. you know I shouldn't be ashamed about loving the swings…" As Raven leant a little closer the air between them became suddenly thick like they were both expecting something but neither knew how to get that something. Before either of them could make another move they both heard footsteps padding down the hallway coming towards them, they both smiled at each other and turned to face the direction of the hallway. Seconds later Zachary came running excitedly into their view wearing a new t-shirt, it was a plain black polo T-shirt that Raven recognised as one of Oscar's old T-shirts. Zachary ran around the couch and jumped onto his Mama hugging her as he giggled excitedly;

"Look Mama…. Clean"

"You are…. did Auntie Lexa fix you up?"

"Yeah, cleaned all my shirt" Zachary sweetly responded his hand shooting to his chest and rubbing up and down showing his Mama where he had previously been covered in juice

"Good…you look really handsome…even more than before"

"Handsome King"

"Exactly your me and Mommy's handsome king"

"Yeah" Zachary laughed out giggling softly at his Mama's words. Leaning forward he wrapped his arms around his Mama's neck as he leant forward a little more. "Park now Mama…."

"Ok then, let's get Auntie Lexa then we can go park"

Zachary's instantly sat up climbing down his Mama's legs before running to the hallway shouting "SMART LEXA…PARK NOW" Seconds later Lexa came running into the living room making Zachary squeal slightly jumping on the spot before he ran to his Mama for protection. Giggling his little heart out as Lexa ran after him, leaning down she began tickling him before lifting him into the air making him giggle even more.

Lexa carried on tickling her nephew as she carried him out of the apartment placing him on the floor and reminding him to stay with her or his Mommies'. He nodded his head softly before he grabbed hold of her hand again surprisingly her at his trust of her. Waiting for Octavia and Raven, Lexa and Zachary waited patiently, as they did Zachary began telling his Auntie about his nursery and all the things he did, she couldn't understand some of what he said, not because he wasn't saying anything correctly but because he was talking so fast. Soon enough Raven and Octavia joined them and the four of them walked downstairs to the car park, whilst they were getting Zachary into his car seat they decided that it would be easier for them to drive in one car instead of taking two cars and then Clarke's as well. Calling up Clarke and placing the call on speaker the four women decided that Clarke would meet them at the park in the park's car park. Once they were all agreed Clarke said her goodbyes and hung up, Lexa told her sister and Octavia that she'd jump in the back with Zachary, who happily cheered when his Auntie got into the back of the car with him instantly beginning to talk to her.

Twenty Minutes Later, they were at the park as Zachary excitedly jumped up and down as he was removed from the car and placed carefully on the ground at the same time being told not to run off. As Lexa got out of the car and closed her door she heard her nephew call out her name running around the car she jumped in front of Zachary making him laugh, before he excitedly stepped forward and grabbed his Auntie Lexa's hand. As Octavia removed Zachary's travel bag from the back of the car Raven took the bag from her naturally reaching down and taking Octavia's hand in her own, she instantly realised what she'd done and that it might send the wrong signals to Octavia but she couldn't help it, she wanted and needed to hold her wife's hand, she hadn't done it for such a long time she needed it, even just to feel normal. As they walked on the grass towards the main car park Octavia was about to ask when Clarke and the twins would get here when they heard two small voices shouting out "MAMA"

Lexa didn't even need to turn around to know who the voice belonged to, she knew those voices belong to the twins, slowly turning around she noticed Olivia and Oscar running towards her watched on by Clarke. Letting go of Zachary's hand Lexa braced herself to be jumped on. And low and behold seconds later Olivia and Oscar crashed into Lexa's chest giggling and hugging their Mama. They hugged her for a second before they let go their attention turning to their Aunties behind their Mama;

"Auntie Rae" Olivia let out in excitement running to her Auntie Raven jumping up, making Raven quickly released her hold on Octavia's hand so she could catch her niece. Catching Olivia, she lifted her onto her chest hugging her tightly.

At the same time Oscar ran full force towards his Auntie Octavia shouting out "Aunt Tavi…." Octavia laughed softly at the name before lifting her nephew in the air and onto her chest hugging Oscar tightly "Missed you Aunt Tavi" He sweetly let out, recently he hadn't seen her as much as he normally did, which meant she didn't get to play soldiers or superheroes with him.

"I missed you too buddy…and so has Zachary he asks about you all the time"

At the mention of his cousin's name Oscar looked down at Zachary wriggling slightly in his Auntie Octavia's hand until she put him down, quickly he moved over to Zachary hugging his cousin softly, getting an excited hug and giggle back from Zachary. "Quick Zachary, we have loads to play on"

"Slide" Zachary responded excitedly taking hold of Oscar's hand and walking back towards Clarke who was near the main park. The two boys began running a little more as they got closer to the park the excitement clear for all the adults to see.

As Lexa watched the two boys she walked forward continuing onto Clarke, knowing her daughter was perfectly safe and happy with her twin sister. Once she reached her wife she took her hand leading her into the main park and over to a bench and table, placing their bags next to the table her and Clarke sat down. Once they were sat down Lexa leant into Clarke capturing her lips with her own "Hi" She softly muttered as she pulled back from the kiss

"Hi"

"How are you feeling after earlier?"

"Good, I spoke to my Mom and she calmed me down at little bit more"

"Good, don't worry too much about it ok…I know it's hard not to, but you heard Ms Fox. Nobody is taking the twins from us and more than likely nothing will come from the complaint. She already said she believes it's a false complaint."

"I know….but until I feel the paperwork in front of me I'm gonna be thinking and worrying about it"

"I know but let's not let this ruin our family day…ok?" Lexa asked raising her eyebrows and leaning forward a little waiting for Clarke to respond. Clarke nodded her head smiling softly at her wife's actions and words, seeing the nod Lexa nodded herself leaning forward smiling as she kissed Clarke again. This time the kiss lasted a little longer, their lips staying connected until Raven's voice interrupted them making them break apart

"Seriously guys, in a park full of children….and in front of me…nah uh that's enough of the PDA's for today thank you very much" Raven responded smirking as she sat down opposite Lexa carefully placing her niece so she was say forward facing her Mama and Octavia sat down opposite Clarke. Smirking at the two women as they gave her an unimpressed look, she continued "So Olivia was telling me all about some pictures you have of me on your phone Clarkey?"

Clarke laughed softly at Raven rolling her eyes softly "They are pictures of you and Lexa with the twins and Zachary…don't worry I'm not secretly lusting after you Rae"

"Damn it, and here's me getting my hopes up"

"Oh yeah, I'm sure your heartbroken"

"I am…but I'm more interested, Olivia told me you have a perfect picture of you and Lexa…. I've never seen a perfect picture of my sister so I'm intrigued to see it" Raven responded getting a gentle slap on the forearm from her twin sister

"My Mama is perfect" Olivia sweetly responded making Lexa smile brightly at her daughter's words "Mama looks like an angel in the picture…." Looking at her Mommy she sweetly asked, "Can you show Auntie Rae please Mommy?"

"How about you show Auntie Rae…" Clarke smiled pulling her phone out of her pocket unlocking it, opening up the pictures app before handing the phone to her daughter "Here you go Princess"

"Thank you, Mommy," Olivia sweetly responded as she went through the pictures finding the picture she was looking for holding it in front of her and her Auntie Rae she showed her. "See Auntie Rae….Mama looks perfect"

Raven looked at the picture she had to admit her sister did look perfect in the picture, not a hair out of place, her skin looked immaculate and her smile was bright and pure. As she studied her sister in the picture trying her hardest to find something wrong with the picture, just so she could wind her sister up a little, just like she always did. Finding nothing she asked Olivia to show her the next perfect picture which her niece quickly did, bringing up the picture of Clarke and Lexa in the cinema, the same picture taken by the gentleman on their date night. Again studying the picture of her twin sister, trying to find a fault, but this time as she concentrated something in the background of the picture grabbed her attention, pressing down on the picture she didn't concentrate on the two women in the picture but instead she noticed something….well someone in the background, as she looked harder at the picture she thought to herself

'That can't be who I think it is…..' Again she concentrated harder on the image until it clicked in her head 'It is…Oh my god that's Roan'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK…I know that was a little bit of a weird ending BUT it will click together in the next chapter as Raven…yes Raven…puts two and two together, but will she get four or five…and if so will Lexa believe her…We'll see in the next chapter…the next chapter will be perhaps a longer one than normal I'm not sure at the moment it all depends on how it plans out as I write it, I know where it needs to end but getting there may take a little longer than it normally would That probably makes no sense but hey ho lol. Anyway, I'll won't continue nattering (talking) any longer and I'll leave you all to it…and until next time Peeps and Peepettes, Stay Safe and Keep Fanficing


	26. Cuts & Grazes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heeeellllllloooooooo Everyone, Hope your all doing really well and your having an awesome week....Just wanna say a Massive THANK YOU to everyone that left a comment on the last chapter, you are all very kind and I appreciate you all taking the time out to do so :-) Also thank you for those that left kudos or bookmarked this story :-) Hope you all enjoy this chapter

** Chapter 26-Cuts & Grazes **

Raven sat looking at the man in the background of the picture, it was Roan there was no way it could be someone else. It was differently him, holding her thumb down on the picture she watched Roan in the background of the picture, she watched as his face filled with anger as Clarke and Lexa smiled and enjoyed each other’s company. Looking at the pictures as Olivia excitedly showed her more of them, as the pictures appeared on the screen of Clarke’s phone she kept her eyes looking in the background thinking that maybe Roan was in more than one picture. The picture’s stopped changing causing Raven to look down at her niece noticing she was now looking up at her;

 

“I like spending loads of time with you Rae….”

 

“I love spending time with you too”

 

“Can I go play for a bit though….I’ll come back I swears”

 

“You don’t need to ask Livy, you go play with the boys, and be careful ok?”

 

“Ok Auntie Rae…I love you”

 

“And I love you Livy”

 

Olivia smiled jumping down from her Auntie Rae’s lap turning to run over to her brother and their cousin, she stopped looking at Octavia “I love you too Aunt Tavi…..” She added before quickly turning to her Mama and hugging her tightly “I love you too Mama…and You too Mommy”

 

“And we all love you back Princess” Lexa responded smiling at her daughter’s sweet actions and words. Olivia released her hold on her Mama rushing around the table and hugging her Mommy then her Auntie Tavi before she ran off to the slide to find Oscar and Zachary. Lexa watched her daughter run off smiling at the happiness in her daughter’s body language. Looking back to her sister she could see something was on her mind, the way Raven was looking at the pictures in front of her wasn’t normal. “Rae, I’m gonna grab a drink, give me a hand?”

 

“Sure” Raven said shaking her head softly before placing the phone on the table and standing up and taking a few steps waiting for Lexa to join her. Lexa walked forward walking beside her sister, both of them walking off towards the cabin that sold drinks and all kinds of items for people who used the park. As they walked away Raven looked back naturally looking at Octavia and asking “What do you want babe?”

 

“Um, a coffee please” Octavia responded slightly taken aback but completely happy at being called ‘babe’ by Raven, it was a pet name she hadn’t heard from her wife in so long, and it was one that she missed hearing the most.

 

“No problem….Clarke?”

 

“Lexa knows what I like right babe?” Clarke responded smirking at her wife, knowing Lexa would no doubt mention how much coffee she drinks being a bad thing, but would still buy her the coffee none the less.

 

“Of course I know sugar” Lexa smirked back, she knew what Clarke was thinking and decided just to ignore it and play along later, choosing to concentrate on her sister’s weird behaviour from moments before hand. Wrapping her arm around her sisters shoulders pulling her closer she walked them in the direction of the shop only about fifty feet away from them. Once they were far enough away from their wife’s she kept her voice low asking “What’s going on in your head?” Looking back at Clarke’s phone on the table Raven nervously looked at her sister, slightly hesitating whether or not to say anything “What is it Rae?”

 

“I just saw something in one of those pictures”

 

“What?”

 

Looking at the worry on Lexa’s face she decided not to say anything right now knowing her sister would only worry “Nothing, just me being silly…don’t worry about it”

 

“Ok” Lexa knew Raven was lying, she always knew when her sister was lying, she would say it was one of the perks of being a twin but she was almost sure it was nothing to do with them being twins, and more to do with them having a close bond. “As long as your sure” Raven nodded her head at her sister not looking in her direction knowing she’d burst out what she was trying to hold in.

 

They both walked into the small shop walking through it to the back until they were at the small counter you ordered drinks from, Lexa ordered and paid for drinks for all four adults and then getting three juice cartoons for Zachary and the twins, knowing that the three children would feel slightly left out if the adults got drinks and they didn’t. As they were waiting for their hot drinks to be made and handed to them, Lexa noticed that Raven was avoiding looking at her, ignoring it she continued to wait until she felt her sisters eyes land on her and her voice nervously say;

 

“It was Roan”

 

“What was Roan?” Lexa asked not really sure what her sister was talking about

 

“The thing I saw in the back of the picture…..it was Roan”

 

“What”

 

“It was him Lex, I know that face and I know that scowl….it was him”

 

“When? ….What picture?”

 

“The one of you and Clarke at the cinema, the one someone else took for you”

 

“Are you sure?” Lexa cautiously asked, she knew her sister wasn’t likely to confuse Roan for anyone else. But she was silently hoping that Raven would say she wasn’t sure.

 

“I’m sure Lex, I looked at that picture for a good five minutes Lexa, you saw me looking at it….it was him I wasn’t sure at first but when I zoomed into it, I recognised him One Hundred Percent”

 

Lexa was about to speak when the lady at the counter called out to her and Raven telling them their drinks were ready, seeing the four hot drinks placed neatly and safely into a four cardboard cup holder. Stepping forward without a word to her sister, Lexa picked up the hot drinks nodding to the outside of the shop signalling that they’d talk outside. Raven silently nodded back stepping forward and collecting the cold drinks from the counter they had been resting whilst they waited for the hot drinks. Carrying the drinks outside she noticed Lexa off to her right now sitting down at a table, her elbows on the table, her hands covering her face as the drinks sat in the cup holder in front of her. Walking quickly over to Lexa, Raven glanced back at Octavia and Clarke just able to make out the two women talking at the table. Sitting down next to her twin she placed the drinks in her hand onto the table next to the other drinks, before she carefully pulled one of Lexa’s hands from over her face forcing her sister to look at her.

 

“You believe me right? I won’t make something like this up Le….”

 

“I believe you…I know you’d never lie about something like this to me….” Covering her face again she let out a small frustrated grown as she firmly wiped her hands up and down her face a few times before falling back in the chair looking at Raven, looking up at the sky

 

“What is it Lex? Theres something you haven’t told me”

 

Lexa took a few breaths in taking her time to think over her words, letting out a long breath she looked at Raven and explained “I think it was Roan that made the complaint”

 

“Are you being serious?”

 

“Yes, I am”

 

“I know he wants Clarke but that doesn’t make sense…. if she found out she’d hate him forever”

 

“The complaint was anonymous, that means it can’t be proven it was him. All we get is a transcript of the call we can’t hear that actual call itself…”

 

“Maybe but still calling CPS is major…that’s a big move”

 

“I know it is…I’m hoping it isn’t true Rae….that him being in that picture and then a complaint being made that exact same night is all some massive coincidence…and that I’m one hundred percent wrong but knowing him….and Nia, the more I think about it the more it fits their way of working…”

 

“Letting someone else do all the dirty work for them, whilst they stand back and watch the chaos”

 

“Yeah…if they both really want me and Clarke they wont stop at anything to get what they want….I mean when me and her broke up she went crazy remember”

 

“Unfortunately I do….she tried to fight anyone that spoke to you, I remember the stories and seeing it first hand when she transferred to Arkadia High for her last year…just to be near you”

 

“See…the more I think it over and think about Nia and Roan the more it fits Nia’s way of thinking…and we both know her brother is just as unstable as her”

 

Raven remained silent, she didn’t know what to do or what to say, the more Lexa spoke and the more she thought about it, the more it made sense that Roan would be the one that made the complaint against Clarke and Lexa. He wanted Clarke all for himself. Taking a breath in she looked at Lexa and softly asked “So what are you going to do?”

 

“What can I do Rae? …. I can’t tell Clarke without proof, I know what she’s like she’ll go straight after him. Anything to do with the twins she just loses her cool, she can’t control it, it’s like a switch goes off inside her. I don’t think I can control her anger as well as my own.”

 

“So, what do you plan on doing? You can’t hide what you’re thinking from her?”

 

“I don’t plan on hiding it, I just wanna check some stuff out before I talk to her about it….and about everything”

 

“You mean your gonna tell her your feeling angry at her?”

 

“Yeah, I can’t lie to her…I can’t pretend, I promised her I’d talk to her if she did the same. And maybe talking it out with her will help me process everything a little more” Lexa explained, as she spoke about her anger towards Clarke and telling her wife exactly what she was thinking and feeling, her thoughts began to go over every small thing that had happened over the last few weeks, every weird noise or creak she’d heard. Even the few times she’d been alone in the studio and thought that she was being watched by someone. She could feel the worry and panic filling her facial expression she wanted to hide it but before she could Raven had already seen the look and worryingly asked;

 

“Lex, what is it? What are you thinking about?”

 

“It’s probably nothing…just my mind over reacting to Roan seeing me and Clarke”

 

“Let me be the judge of that…. tell me”

 

“I…. I think…that…. maybe…I don’t know, it’s stupid Rae it’s probably nothing, I’m just being sensitive and over the top”

 

“Alexa, tell me now…don’t make me get Clarke”

 

“I think Roan’s been following me”

 

“What?” Raven let out, she didn’t know what she was expecting her sister to say but she most definitely wasn’t expecting her to say that of all things possible. “What do you mean you think? What makes you think that?”

 

“I don’t know…like I said I’m probably just over reacting…”

 

“Lex…. you don’t over react…talk through it with me, come on…just tell me what you’re thinking and I’ll tell you if I think your making sense or not”

 

“Well…firstly there was him showing up at the house and scaring Olivia and Clarke…”

 

“Ok that’s one thing…that can be explained away as him trying to worm his way back in with Clarke…. come on what next?”

 

“A few times Olivia has told me she’s seen the bad man when she was playing in the garden with Oscar”

 

“I remember you mentioning that, you looked around, right?”

 

“Yeah, I didn’t see anything but I could hardly go searching for him, could I?”

 

“Ok, what else?”

 

“A few times I’ve been at the studio on my own, when I leave it feels like someone is watching me. It probably sounds like I’m being paranoid but I’ve never ever felt that leaving the studio ever, a few times I’ve felt the same inside, like someone keeps peering into the window of the studio door. It happened that night you found out about Octavia’s lies…” Lexa stopped when she saw her sisters grimace at the reminder of that night “Sorry…”

 

“It’s ok Lex….keep going”

 

“When I was getting you into the car I felt the same, and then when I driving I noticed there was a car that was going the same way, it turned off about five minutes before I got back to the house but thinking about it now it was the only other car on the road, what are the odds that it would be going the same way as me for twenty minutes, plus I was going under the speed limit, why wouldn’t they just overpass me”

 

“That’s a little weird yeah but can be down to any number of reasons Lex…anything else”

 

“I don’t know Rae, this is insane….” Lexa let out pushing her chair back and standing up turning her back to her sister and the park where their kids and wives were, covering her face with her hands she looked up letting out a massive groan as she tried to process everything that was going on and that she’d just found out as she tried at the same time to control her emotions.

 

Raven stood up almost instantly, walking in front of her sister she gently grabbed hold of her wrists pulling them downwards so they were no longer covering Lexa’s face. She could see the mixture of emotions in her twin sisters face, from anger to sadness to confusion to frustration there were so many emotions in Lexa’s expression it was almost overwhelming for her. Looking into Lexa’s eyes she held onto Lexa’s wrists, “Hey just take a deep breath in…we’ll work it out, that was only a few weeks ago so we’ll have a look at the CCTV and see if we can find something, but until then we won’t know what’s real or not…ok?” Lexa slowly nodded her head looking her sister in the eyes as she took continuous deep breaths in and out, Raven was right there was no point in her getting herself worked up when she didn’t have any proof. “Good, just stay calm ok, we know something’s up but right now you need to stay calm…for the twins and Clarke…I promise we’ll work this out together…just enjoy today with your family….ok…” Lexa nodded her head letting out a massive breath as Raven used her grip on Lexa’s wrist to pull her sister into a comforting hug. She knew whatever was going to come wasn’t going to be easy but she knew that she was going to look after and look out for her sister no matter what. And she was sure as hell going to make sure that they found out for sure whether or not Roan was following Lexa or not. 

* * *

** Clarke and Octavia-Inside the Park **

Octavia and Clarke had been sat talking and catching up since Raven and Lexa left them to get drinks about Fifthteen minutes ago. Both of them were wondering what was talking their wives so long but they guessed they’d got caught up waiting for the drinks to be made up, and they were more than likely chatting about some track as they tended to do a lot of the time. Neither of them was too worried and instead enjoyed the time they were getting to chat to each other properly, they would look over at the twins and Zachary every few minutes out of natural instinct, making sure they were all ok and still playing nicely with each other. They’d only just got onto the subject of Octavia and Raven’s relationship and how it had been over the last few weeks, Clarke had waited for Octavia to bring the subject up knowing herself how hard it was talk about a relationship that was going through a massive rough patch. Octavia had begun explaining to her about the phone conversations her and Raven had had over the last few days.

 

“Surely that's a good thing though, you two talking so much…right?”

 

“Yeah it is, it's amazing but as amazing as it is, it just makes me miss her even more…..but I mean we’re making progress…..did you hear her call me babe earlier?”

 

“I did….I’m guessing that you haven't heard that in a while”

 

“So so long…even when we talk on the phone I can hear her forcing herself not to call me it…. I know it’s stupid but hearing her call me Octavia just sounds weird to me, I don’t know why”

 

“Because she’s called you babe or baby or O for so long that hearing her use your full name doesn’t feel like normal anymore, it feels more like you’re in trouble or something…. that’s how it felt with Lexa anyway…she calls me Clarke quite a bit but when we were separated, for some reason it sounded different”

 

“Yeah oddly that makes a lot of sense” Octavia responded unable to hold in a small laugh as she looked across the table at her best friend. “To be honest I’m just happy she’s talking to me at all, when I told her everything that look on her face was something I’d never seen before and never want to see again…she was so angry and upset…and disappointed, and all those things were because of something I did to her….and I know I didn’t deserve for her to even think about forgiving me but I am so so happy that she is…” Taking a small breath in Octavia softly smiled sitting up a little straighter as she continued talking “You know I knew I messed up massively but I didn’t realise how massively until I saw that look on her face, and then she told me to leave…then it hit me like a truck….I’d be nothing without her, she’s everything that makes me who I am, she makes the bad parts of me good, because she takes away all that doubt and that misbelief in myself that I feel…and just loves me for me…I don’t have to put a mask on or pretend to be something I’m not…and that’s all because of her….and I nearly fucked that up permanently…and knowing that is the single…”

 

“Worst feeling in the world” Clarke finished returning her best friends soft comforting smile “I know how you feel O…. I nearly lost Lexa because I couldn’t trust that she loved me enough to be faithful”

 

“I’m so sorry, I completely forgot to ask how things with you and Lexa are”

 

“You don’t need to apologise Octavia, I asked how things were going between you and Rae, I asked and you answered…that’s how conversations work O”

 

“Yeah sorry…I just know I’ve got a lot of making up to do with you and Lexa as well as Raven”

 

“You do, but I’ve forgiven you…I haven’t forgotten it, and at some point we really need to have a insanely real conversation about everything but I can’t blame you for everything O…I believed what you told me and I didn’t question it no matter what Lexa told me or how much Lexa told me that she didn’t cheat on me…I chose to believe someone else over her and that’s something I have to deal with…and I have to earn her trust back because of it…you have to do the same with Rae, you have to make sure that she knows you can trust every single word that comes out of your mouth no matter what it’s about….and you have to be okay with her questioning you sometimes..”

 

“I know I do…and I am fine with it…I lied for nearly eight years I know that was wrong and I know that ruined every single piece of trust that she had in me…. I just hope I haven’t completely fucked up everything and that she can actually forgive me completely…you know like forgive me and move back home…”

 

“I’m sure she will O, if she wasn’t thinking about it she wouldn’t have told you she isn’t divorcing you…we both know Raven and we both know that if she wanted a divorce and for everything to be completely over between you, or even if she thought she couldn’t forgive you completely she’d tell you…she wouldn’t make you suffer like that…”

 

“Your right…she’s not like that…which just makes me hate myself even more…”

 

“I know how you feel…welcome to the club”

 

“It completely sucks…. anyway how are you and Lexa doing? …especially after your visitor earlier”

 

“We’re doing really great…too great I think”

 

“What do you mean too great?”

 

“Everything seems like it used to be”

 

“Isn’t that what you want?”

 

“Yes and No….I know Lexa, sometimes I think I know her better than I know myself, and I know when she’s holding out on me, and when she’s hiding how she really feels…and I know she’s holding back something from me. She’s not telling me how she truly feels, she told me that she resents me for not believing her when she told me didn’t cheat…and I believe that completely but since Ms Fox’s visit it feels different like she’s hiding something else from me….I can’t explain it, its probably just me but I promised her that I’d talk to her about how I was feeling so that’s what I’m going to do”

 

“You don’t think she blames you for the complaint, do you?”

 

“No….I just know something is wrong….well not wrong but off…she’s not telling me something….like last night before all of this Ms Fox thing she woke up at about 5am I didn’t think she was gone for long but I remember waking up for a minute or so at 6am and she was getting back in bed, the more I think about it the more I think she was downstairs for that hour doing something…probably writing but now its in my mind more I need to ask her what she was doing before my mind goes crazy with itself…because all I can think is she was angry and didn’t want to sleep in bed with me…Which I know makes no sense because she got back into bed with me later on…but that’s how I am, I don’t think about things and then all these little things build in my mind and it feels like my mind is about to explode because they add up to a massive thing…. I just know there's something she’s holding back from me and I want her to know that I don’t care what it is and she can tell me without worrying I’m gonna shout at her or be angry in anyway, I want her to know she can really trust me like one hundred percent…”

 

“You don’t think she does?”

 

“Not One Hundred Percent no, I think that she trusts me but she doesn’t trust that I’ll believe her completely if something else comes up….that I’ll believe someone else over her no matter what it’s about, and I deserve that…I didn’t trust her when I should have, and now she doesn’t trust me to believe her and now I have to earn it back because I have been an idiot and I love her more than life itself most days…that’s how I know how you feel without Raven because I felt it for a year and believe me you don’t want to feel that for a whole year no matter how much you might feel and think you deserve it….because its hell on earth…”

 

“I don’t think I could survive a year without her being at home, I’m already going crazy not having her there and I start with that music video shoot in a week…which means I’ll be seeing less of Zachary and he’s the only thing that’s been keeping me going since she moved out…when he’s not there I don’t know what to do with myself.”

 

“I know exactly how you feel…the twins have kept me stronger than I thought possible…just knowing that there are two tiny people that depend on me to get up every day kept me going…”

 

There was a moments silence between the best friends as they both pondered what the future could hold for them and their respective wives, either was sure what was going to happen but they both knew what they wanted and hoped would happen. And they both hoped each other would get the happy ever after they wanted and desired. Smiling at each other, Octavia’s thoughts vocalised as she looked at her blonde best friend and very seriously asked;

 

“Do you think she’ll truly forgive me?”

 

“I don’t know O” Clarke honestly answered, she wanted to lie but she promised herself that she would remove all lies from her life. Any lie in any form to her was a bad thing, no matter how small or big it was, she wanted it gone from her life. And this was Octavia, her best friend for over ten years, she needed to be honest with her because deep down she knew Octavia would tell if she was lying.

 

Octavia didn’t respond to Clarke’s words instead she sent a thankful and somewhat sombre smile Clarke’s way. The silence between them remained until minutes passed and they began talking about the Nursery the twins and Zachary all attended. “I think it was a member of staff that got them all sick…” Octavia began gossiping as her and Clarke always did, usually they did it over a coffee in a café when all the kids were at nursery and usually the nursery wasn’t the subject of their gossip. But still now was a good a time as any Octavia supposed, especially considering they were waiting for their wives to return from their drink run, which they both were still thinking was taking a little longer than normal. Their gossip was stopped when Zachary surprised his Mommy jumping onto her lap and onto the small space between her and the table edge. As he pulled himself up Octavia laughed softly at him lifting him in the air and sitting him on her lap as he smiled up at her;

 

“Hi Mommy”

 

“Hi baby…are you all played out?”

 

“No”

 

“Then why are you with boring Mommy then?”  


“Mommy loads of fun”

 

“Thank you…but why don’t you go back and play with Livy and Oz?”

 

“Livy fell over Mommy, and Oz said he would better”

 

“When did she fall over?”

 

“Just minute go, Mommy”

 

Octavia and Clarke both looked at each other, neither could hear crying from Olivia or any other child. “Where did she fall over?”

 

“Near the slide”

 

“Ok”

 

Clarke and Octavia instantly turned their attention to slide and sure enough their eyes fell on Olivia and Oscar. Oscar was standing hugging his twin sister, seeing his Mommy looking at him his own eyes filled with tears and he let go of his sister and the sound of her crying erupted through the playground now filling Clarke’s ears making the worry inside her rise fully. Oscar had been hugging his sister so tightly that her cries had been muffled by his chest stopping anyone who wasn’t right next to them unable to hear the cries.

 

As Oscar stood moving a few steps away from his twin, Clarke’s eyes instantly fell on her daughter her forearms had small grazes and cuts on them, her hands had grazes on the palms, the final injury Clarke took in was the deep graze to her daughter’s chin. Without a second thought, Clarke ran forward as fast as she could manage to, stopping in front of Olivia scooping her daughter up into her arms. As Olivia saw her Mommy she reached up, holding her grazed palms in the air at her Mommy, crying loudly calling out as the pain and fear rushed through her tiny body. Tear rushing from her eyes and covering her face, tear after tear that fell being replaced instantly with a fresh one. Olivia’s arms instantly around her Mommy’s neck as her small body shook viciously with cries that escaped her lungs and she buried her head in her Mommy’s neck and shoulder. Clarke could only shush her daughter trying to ease the crying coming from Olivia so she could try and convince her daughter that everything was going to be fine. Clarke held her daughter tightly for a moment as she watched Octavia approach her and Oscar with Zachary by her side. She was thankful when her best friend held her arms out to Oscar and her son quickly ran towards his Auntie Octavia hugging her waist tightly. As she began swaying herself slightly hoping it would soothe her daughter’s cries, she saw Octavia lift Oscar off the ground soothing his cries and telling him Olivia would be fine.

 

Octavia turned walking back to the table their stuff was, carrying Oscar with her as Zachary held onto her Mommy’s free hand. Turning and following her best friend Clarke hope the walking motion would soothe Olivia, but it didn’t. Cries still erupted from her daughter’s chest, Clarke didn’t know what else to do except lift her daughter from her chest slightly looking in her eyes she soothingly and softly said “It’s ok Princess….your ok, everything’s ok now”

 

“I hurt myself” Olivia cried out not taking a breath causing her to take three quick and sharp breaths, as she finished answering her Mommy. She continued crying, more and more tears escaping her eyes as she sniffled and looked at her Mommy her face contorting with the crying “I want Mama” She cried out, she wanted the pain to go away and her Mama always made her feel better. Her Mommy did as well but this time it wasn’t working and she really wanted her Mama cuddles. Leaning forward she rested her forehead against her Mommy’s chin feeling her Mommy place gentle kissed on her forehead, none of them making the pain go away either “I WANT MAMA…. MAMA….” She let out crying louder and louder “MA….MA…...MAMA”

 

Raven and Lexa were walking back with everyone’s drinks when Lexa heard a cry, she knew that cry anywhere it was Olivia’s cry. And that’s when she heard her daughter’s voice calling out, well more screaming out for her. Looking at her sister she softly said “Olivia…” Quickly looking into the park where she knew Clarke and Octavia had been she noticed Octavia holding her son, whilst a few metres away Clarke was holding their daughter placing gentle kisses on her forehead obviously trying to calm her down. Wanting to rush forward she looked to Raven who held her hand out, knowing what the motion was for, Lexa carefully handed the cup holder filled with their drinks to her twin, as soon as the holder was out of her hand and safely in Ravens, Lexa took off running as she opened the gate moving quickly towards her daughter as she spoke “Mama’s here baby….” Hearing the voice Clarke and Olivia turned looking in Lexa’s direction…

 

“Mama…” Olivia cried out holding her arms towards her Mama

 

As soon as she was close enough Lexa lifted their daughter out of Clarke’s arms, now seeing the injuries that covered their four-year-old. Lifting Olivia onto her chest she soothingly whispered in her daughter’s ear “I’m here princess…. you’re ok…it’s all gonna be ok”

 

“It hurts Mama”

 

“I know it does baby….” Lexa soothed rubbing her daughter’s back as she bounced slightly on her feet “But I promise soon it won’t hurt anymore ok…. you just have to breathe through it for Mama”

 

“Don’t want to Mama…. want it to go away now”

 

“I know you do princess but that’s not how pain works unfortunately”

 

“Why not Mama?”

 

“I don’t know why not Princess but that’s how it works ok?” Lexa figured that telling her daughter was the best option now, she could feel how scared and much pain her daughter was in. And telling her all the pain would be gone straight away wouldn’t help when she was in pain seconds later. She felt Olivia nod against her softly, placing gentle kisses on the side of her daughter’s head, her eyes fell on Clarke who was standing next to her the worry clear in her face. Reaching over with one of her hands she gently took hold of Clarke’s squeezing it softly as she kept hold of it walking over to the table pulling Clarke with her, she carefully sat down so Olivia was sat on her lap facing her as she kept her head against her Mama’s chest. Clarke took the sign and sat down next to them, not too close but not too far away from them either. Lexa didn’t say a word for a few minutes, as she let her daughter get all her emotions out she looked over at her son visually checking he wasn’t injured at all. Seeing he was fine and was only crying softly into his Auntie Octavia’s chest, she turned her attention fully back to Olivia, softly leaning down she whispered asking Olivia;

 

“Where did you hurt yourself princess?” She knew the answer but she also knew that Olivia would keep crying unless she was made to talk or do something to take her mind away from the upset and pain she was feeling. As Olivia looked up she sniffled back more tears, bringing her fingers up to point at her chin.

 

“Here Mama”

 

“Anywhere else?”

 

“Here…” She emotionally said pointing to her forearms and the grazes and cuts that covered them “And my hands” She added holding her hands in-between her and her Mama so her palms were pointing up at her Mama showing her the grazes on her palms “But this one hurts the most Mama” She added pointing again to her chin

 

“It does?” Lexa softly asked, Olivia nodded her head her bottom lip sticking out slightly as more tears brimmed in her eyes “Let Mama have a look” Lexa let out placing her hand gently on the unharmed skin next to graze on her daughter’s chin, holding the skin gently so her daughter didn’t move. She looked over the injury seeing it was a deep graze but not deep enough to cause any serious damage or deep enough to warrant a visit to the hospital. She could see small fragments of dirt in it and knew that cleaning it out would be something that might cause Olivia a little discomfort. “It doesn’t look too bad princess…once Mommy cleans it out, then well leave it uncovered and it should be gone really soon”

 

“It won’t be there forever Mama?”

 

“No, it won’t Princess”

 

“Will it hurt when Mommy cleans it?”

 

“A little bit, but Mommy will be as gentle as possible…” Looking at Clarke she softly asked, “Won’t you Mommy?”

 

“Yes…I’ll be as gentle and as quick as possible Princess” Clarke responded smiling softly at her daughter as she reached forward gently stroking her daughter’s hair

 

“Can you do it now Mommy?”

 

“Right now?”

 

“Please Mommy…. I want the pain to be all gone”

 

Clarke looked at Lexa not sure if that was the best option “I think I have some basic first aid stuff in the car…plasters and antiseptic wipes…. what do you think?” Lexa didn’t respond verbally instead she nodded her head softly confirming it was best to do it now instead of later when Olivia had calmed down completely. “Ok Princess…I’ll go get the stuff from the car and then I’ll clean your grazes and cuts for you …. but it may be really uncomfortable ok…so I’m really sorry…” Clarke explained getting a sad nod from their daughter as she continued to lean sadly against her Mama, her small hands trying to hold onto her Mama’s shirt the best she could. Seeing the motion Clarke didn’t push her daughter anymore instead she exchanged a small smile with Lexa before standing up and walking to Octavia stopping next to her best friend kneeling so she was level with her son. “You wanna come with Mommy to the car?” Oscar didn’t verbally respond he just nodded his head pushing himself off his Auntie Octavia as he pouted up at his Mommy his arms shooting into the air towards his Mommy. Reaching down she lifted Oscar from his place against Octavia, as soon as he was against her chest he held onto her tightly burying his head in her neck and shoulder. Softly smiling at the three adults watching her and Oscar she walked away from them slowly heading towards her car, holding onto her son tightly feeling how upset he was just from how he was holding onto her.

 

As she watched Clarke carry their son with her to the car, Lexa looked back down at her daughter gently placing a kiss on the top of Olivia’s head. Looking up at Raven and Octavia, and Zachary who was now sitting on his Mama’s lap, she smiled at them after a second or so Raven suggested going on the swings which Zachary happily and quickly said yes, his Mommies laughed softly at their son before they both stood up. Lexa sent her twin sister a thankful look knowing she was giving her and Lexa a chance to talk to Olivia alone without her worrying about everyone watching her. Waiting a few minutes, knowing Clarke would be asking their son what happened as well as comforting and calming him down. Carefully moving her daughter back a little and gently lifting her chin up softly so Olivia was looking up at her.

 

“Princess….I know your in pain, but can you tell me what happened?” Lexa enquired, she asked the question mainly because she actually wanted to know what had happened and whether her daughter had fallen over or was pushed by someone. The other reason was that she knew if Olivia was busying herself talking and explaining what had happened would distract her from the pain even if it was only for a minute or too. She watched as Olivia looked up at her and sniffled back her now occasional tears as she looked at her Mama, a sad pout covering her face as she took a small breath.

 

“I fell over Mama”

 

“I know you did baby…. but what happened to make you fall over?”

 

“I was playing on the jungle gym, and I ran across the wobbly bridge…and I helped Zachary over it too, then we went through the tunnel and Oscar was running ahead of us…I told him not too Mama he was showing off….” Olivia let out her pout thickening even more “And then I told him to let me go first so I could wait for Zachary at the bottom…”

 

“Did he let you go first?”

 

“He wouldn’t Mama so I moved in front of him….and as I went down he pushed me and I fell off the slide and hit my face here….” Olivia continued to explain pointing to her chin sadly “I tried to stop myself from hitting my face but I just hurt my hands and my arms Mama….”

 

“What happened then? Did you call for Mommy?”

 

“No”

 

“Why not princess? You were hurt you should have called Mommy”

 

“Oscar wouldn’t let me”

 

“He wouldn’t…why wouldn’t he let you call Mommy?”

 

“I don’t know…I think he didn’t want to get into trouble Mama…. he hugged me really tight, I was crying but he just hugged me…. I don’t think he meant to hurt me Mama”

 

“You mean when he pushed you?”

 

“Yeah, Oscar isn’t mean Mama he’s nice and he looks after me all the time at nursery…I don’t want him to get in trouble Mama”

 

“He won’t be but I have to make sure he knows not to push people because it could hurt them…. does that sound fair?”

 

“But he won’t get punished Mama…. you won’t take his toys away from him or make him sad?”

 

“I won’t I’m just going to make sure that he understands not to push…so does that sound fair?”

 

“Yes…. but don’t shout at him Mama pretty please”

 

“I won’t” Lexa couldn’t help but smile at the fact her daughter was trying to make sure that her brother didn’t get into any trouble over whatever had happened between them. She knew what that bond was because it was the same bond she had with Raven, she remembered the numerous times that she and Raven had gotten into fights with each other, not verbal fights but actual physical fights to the point they were throwing and hitting punches on each other, but once they calmed down or they had been broken apart they would cover for each other so the other didn’t get in trouble, pretending that they were just joking or that someone else had given them the injuries.

 

“You promise me you won’t shout Mama?”

 

“Yes I promise you I won’t shout at Oscar” Lexa promised, she knew she wasn’t going to shout at her son, all she wanted at the moment was to hear his side of the story and to make sure that the twins both apologised to each other. She smiled as Olivia leant forward resting her head against her Mama’s chest. Just as she did so she heard the gate to the park open, creaking ever so slightly making Lexa and Olivia aware that someone was coming into the park. Turning around slightly they noticed Clarke and Oscar returning to the park, Oscar was now walking next to his Mommy holding onto her right hand as she held a small first aid kit in her left hand. Once he was close enough Oscar ran to the bench his Mama and twin sister were sitting on, climbing up he nervously looked at his sister moving a little closer to her he sadly spoke;

 

“I’m sorry I pushed you Livy…I didn’t mean to push you hard, I didn’t want you to fall and get hurt…I promise…I just wanted to go down the slide first”

 

“You shouldn’t push”

 

“I know…I’m really sorry Livy, I tried to grab you but you fell so fast I couldn’t”

 

“I’m sorry I pushed you as well Oz, I didn’t mean to make you sad or angry”

 

“Me neither….”

 

“I’m sorry” They both responded at the same time making them both smile brightly and giggle softly. Without another word to each other they both leant forward tentatively hugging each other tightly, Lexa and Clarke could see how Oscar was trying not to hurt his sister as he hugged her. They both watched on making sure that neither twin hurt the other whilst they embraced, as the twins pulled apart smiling softly at each other they looked at their Mommies before they both said at the same time “We said sorry”

 

“Good, you both did the right thing apologising to each other” Clarke softly spoke as she moved forward sitting down on the spare space on the bench placing the first aid kit on the table in front of her, as soon as she sat down on the bench Oscar moved sitting himself on her lap, his side leaning into Clarke’s chest but his front still facing his Mama and sister. Gently wrapping her left arm around her son, she looked from Oscar to Olivia and then back before continuing to speak “I need you both to listen to Mommy for a minute…can you both do that?”

 

“Yes Mommy” They both responded keeping their attention fully on their Mommy waiting to hear what she was going to tell them

 

“I know you’ve both apologised to each other and your best friends again…. but you both need to remember it’s never okay to push someone, no matter how much your upset or how angry you are, you can never be violent with anyone…I know you were both angry at each other and upset, and that you both wanted to look after Zachary but that doesn’t make pushing each other okay. It’s never okay to be violent ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy”

 

“Especially to each other, you two are twins and you should never fight each other you should protect each other….and no matter what the reason is you should never ever hit or push each other…because that’s bad…”

 

“But…”

 

“No buts Oscar…there’s no good reason for either of you to push each other…if your upset and angry at each other you come to me and Mama you don’t start being nasty and violent to each other…. Olivia could have got badly hurt and then she wouldn’t be able to play anymore…and I know you love her and don’t want that to happen…. neither of you do…do you both understand what I’m saying?”

 

“Yes Mommy” They responded at the same time, sad pouts covering their faces as they again spoke at the same time “Sorry Mommy” At the same time Clarke and Lexa hugged the respective twins sitting on their laps letting them both silently know that they were forgiven and that everything would be ok soon.

 

They remained silent for a few minutes before Clarke softly cleared her throat looking at Olivia and softly saying “Let’s clean you up princess, shall we?” She could see the hesitation on her daughter’s face and softly said “Mama can do it for you if you like?”

 

“No….I want you to do it Mommy….”

 

“Ok…”

 

“But can I stay with Mama”

 

“You wanna sit on Mama’s lap whilst I clean out your grazes?”

 

“Yes, please Mommy”

 

“Ok then Princess….do you wanna go play with Auntie Rae while me and Mama do this Oz?” Oscar nodded his head softly, Clarke knew her son wasn’t a fan of any kind of cut, graze or any injury in general. He would get really upset and freak out at the sight of the blood and not look at all. They had no idea where he’d got it from but they did their best to stop him shying away from blood too much not wanting him to struggle when he got older, but at the same time they never pushed him too far. They also knew that when it came to his sister he was protective and very sensitive about her getting hurt, and sometimes his reaction or worrying would make things worse when they tried to help Olivia. Placing a gentle kiss on her son’s head she carefully lifted him off her lap placing him on the floor and watching move forward kissing his sister lovingly on the cheek before running off across the park to his Auntie Rae who was still at the swings with his Auntie Octavia and Zachary. Waiting until Oscar was safely with his Aunties and cousin, Clarke turned back to look at Olivia shuffling a little closer to Lexa and Olivia moving the first aid kit closer before opening it up and removing the antiseptic wipes and dry wipes from it, looking at her daughter’s small worried face she softly asked, “You ready Princess?”

 

“Do I have to have it cleaned Mommy?”

 

“Unfortunately, you do Princess otherwise it might get infected and that could make you sick”

 

“Don’t like being sick Mommy”

 

“I know you don’t Princess I don’t like you being sick either”

 

“Ok Mommy…I’m ready…” Clarke smiled at the bravery of her daughter, but she didn’t miss the fear that flashed in Olivia’s eyes as her hands gripped tightly onto her Mama’s top. Clarke exchanged a worried look with Lexa neither of them wanted to see their daughter in further pain especially after they’d only just managed to calm her down.

 

“I have an idea...” Clarke ventured looking at her wife directly hoping that she didn’t object to it, when Lexa raised her eyebrow questioningly she continued “What if Mama sings you a song to help keep you calm…what do you both think?”

 

“Can you Mama?” Olivia asked innocently looking up at her Mama with an immense amount of hope flowing through her eyes.

 

Lexa smiled at her daughter knowing exactly what Clarke was hoping would happen if she sung, she was hoping that Olivia would get lost in listening to the song and forget that Clarke was tending to her injuries, they’d only had to do this twice before and both times the cuts weren’t as bad as the graze on their daughter’s cheek. Smiling at her wife impressed at the thought she nodded her head softly at her daughter “Of course I can, what song would you like me to sing?” Olivia shrugged her shoulders at the question “Ok, how about I sing you a song that I wrote about Me and Mommy…and the song that a very famous English man now sings…it’s called Perfect…. does that sound like a good plan?” Olivia nodded her head softly at the question smiling at her Mama, Lexa smiled back at her before looking at her wife seeing the intrigued look on Clarke’s face pulling her phone carefully out of her pocket she found the acoustic version on her phone, it was the same acoustic song she’d been playing when her and Clarke had danced in their living room weeks ago, the same dance that lead her to think of the lyrics for the song, pressing play she waited for the right part of the song exchanging a silent ‘ready’ look with Clarke as she looked down at their daughter who already had her eyes closed listening to the music as it played out;

 

** Perfect-Ed Sheeran **

I found a love for me

Darling, just dive right in and follow my lead

Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet

Oh, I never knew you were the someone waiting for me

 

**-Clarke stares at Lexa amazed at the lyrics and song instantly knowing the night the song was written on-**

          'Cause we were just kids when we fell in love               

                                            Not knowing what it was                                             

I will not give you up this time 

But darling, just kiss me slow,

Your heart is all I own

And in your eyes you're holding mine

 

                          Baby, I'm dancing in the dark                           

With you between my arms

                                       Barefoot on the grass,                                      

                            Listening to our favourite song                         

      **-Clarke forces herself to begin cleaning their daughter’s chin graze-**

                     When you said you looked a mess,                   

          **-knowing exactly what night Lexa was singing about in the song-**

I whispered underneath my breath

But you heard it,

Darling, you look perfect tonight

 

Well, I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know

She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I'll share her home

I found a lover to carry more than just my secrets

To carry love, to carry children of our own

 

We are still kids but we're so in love

Fighting against all odds

I know we'll be alright this time

Darling, just hold my hand

Be my girl, I'll be your man

I see my future in your eyes

 

Baby, I'm dancing in the dark

With you between my arms

Barefoot on the grass

Listening to our favourite song

When I saw you in that dress

Looking so beautiful

I don't deserve this

Darling, you look perfect tonight

 

Baby, I'm dancing in the dark

With you between my arms

Barefoot on the grass

Listening to our favourite song

I have faith in what I see

Now I know I have met an angel in person

And she looks perfect,

I don't deserve this

You look perfect tonight

 

As the song finished playing and Lexa finished singing, she looked down at her daughter seeing her eyes were still closed and her graze on her chin had been cleaned out by her wife. As she took her eyes off her daughter for the first time in the last four minutes, she noticed the amazed look on Clarke’s face. Before she had a chance to ask why Clarke was looking at her like that, her wife’s lips were connecting with hers, it wasn’t a lust filled kiss it was one of pure love and thankfulness. Kissing Clarke back she knew that Clarke must have worked out exactly what night she referenced in the song and how on that night she’d realised exactly what she wanted from her future with Clarke. Pulling back, she felt Clarke whisper ‘I love you’ against her lips, before she could respond she felt Olivia move on her lap looking up at Mama an unspoken question on her daughter’s lips “All done Princess” She responded still feeling her wife’s eyes on her, the feeling only made her feel even worse about the hidden emotions she had, the ones she was scared to make known for fear of losing everything that she’d wanted back for so long. 

* * *

 

** Thursday 30th March 2017 11:25am **

** Heda Records **

Raven was inside the security office for Heda Records talking to Monty Green, one of her friends from high school and her and Lexa’s head of Security Technology at Heda Records. She and Lexa hired him when they started out knowing her was probably the best tech guy they knew in the state and probably one of the best hackers in the world. And they both knew that there was nobody who knew what you needed protection against more than a hacker. They soon realised that hiring him was the best decision they made, he made sure all their phone lines were secure and that any computer or online system they used were unhackable and completely safe to use. If there was even the tiniest of a hint of someone trying to hack their information all three of them would receive notice of the attempted hack on their phones. But today she wasn’t using him for simply security matters, she was using his help to amp up her own abilities to hack sites, she was good but even she knew she wasn’t on Monty’s level and now she needed him. She’d tried to hack the phone line that received the anonymous tip about Clarke and Lexa but all she’d managed to hack was their website and she’d then got lost in the endless list of coded emails and phone calls all numbered and filed with seven numbers, three lowercase letters and one capital letter. None the case references meant anything to her and she’d decided to call in Monty on the matter. He’d gotten to Heda Records Forty minutes ago and Raven explained what she needed from him he agreed without hesitation telling her that she and Lexa had treated him like family over the years allowing him to provide for himself Harper and soon enough their chid.

 

Without any further discussion, he logged onto his untraceable laptop logging himself in he began routing through the Child Protective Services website, finding nothing that he could use to track the phone call. He asked Raven for the name of the Case worker who visited Clarke and Lexa. Once he had Ms Fox’s full name he hacked the system finding her email account which he instantly hacked, allowing him access to her IP address and with that he hacked into the computer itself rooting through files and within ten minutes he’d found the phone call file that he and Raven were looking for, with a half smirk and half proud smile on his face he looked back at Raven and confidently said;

 

“Found it”

 

“Are you serious?” Raven asked, she didn’t actually think he’d be able to find the phone call, she’d been hoping that he would but now he had she didn’t know what to say to him. When he nodded at her in confirmation she leant forward wrapping her arms around her neck and leaning against his back “If we weren’t both married I’d kiss you”

 

Monty laughed softly at the comment “Let’s not rule anything out” He jokingly responded before adding “It’s downloading now should only take a few minutes to complete”

 

“Brilliant…” Smiling brightly Raven remembered her conversation with Lexa from the other day in the park “Do you think you could log into our security system and look for something for me?”

 

“Sure, do you know what we’re looking for?”

 

“Kind of, you can see from our key cards and log ins on our computers when Lexa was here alone right?”

 

“Um yeah it may take a second but I could”

 

“Great, could you find the last few times she was here alone in the last two months”

 

Monty typed away on his keyboard for a minute numerous things flashing on and off the screen as he did so. As he stopped a list with nothing but Lexa’s name over and over appeared covering the completely screen “Here we go, are we looking for anything specific”

 

“Can you find the security cam footage for outside for the last four times and run them at the same time?”

 

“Sure, just give me a minute” Monty went back to working his magic on the laptop, his eyes fixed completely and solely on the screen in front of him. Not even needing the look at the keyboard as he typed away, Raven watched as four different windows popped up on the screen “What time?”

 

“About the time that Lexa signed out on each night”

 

“Ok” He quickly responded, clicking on each window he double checked the times Lexa logged out on each of the nights in question. Moving the time on each window to match when Lexa signed out on each night, he let the images play out looking back at Raven “What are we looking for?”

 

“Anything out of the ordinary”

 

Raven and Monty watched the images unfold in front of their eyes, seeing Lexa’s Black and Dark Red Land/Range Rover Evoque Hatchback 4x4 in the parking lot of Heda Records parked in her normal spot at the front of the car parking lot. They watched the screens play on all four playing out at the same time, Raven nervously watched on as Lexa came out of the building she was now herself inside, watching as on all screens her sister turned and lock the doors of the building with her keys. Lexa then entered the security code on the outside of the building, it was the final of the security systems they had installed, each studio had its own code that needed to be entered as well as the reception area having its own and the front door as well. Once the final code was entered Lexa unlocked her car walking towards it and climbing into the driver’s seat without a sign of anyone watching her at all. Raven watched on hoping that all she’d spoken to her sister about was in fact just one massive coincidence and Lexa reading too much into a feeling she got when she was alone. As the footage played on that seemed to become more and more of a reality that was until Lexa’s car had pulled out of the parking lot, disappearing out of the view of the camera, nearly a minute had passed when on each and every window the image of a tall man appeared from the back of the building his eyes fixed on the car that had just driven out of the parking lot. As he stepped more and more out of the shadows Raven instantly recognised the man at the exact time that the recording from Child Protective Services filled the area in the room the voice booming from the speaker of Monty’s laptop;

 

“Hello Child Protective Services? ..….I’d like to report two children in danger…”

 

There was no doubt in her mind who’s voice that was, it was the same voice she dreaded hearing when she was still in school and he and Nia would come around trying to cause problems between their group of friends. As she listened to the call she could feel herself becoming physically sick, there was no doubt that was Roan…Roan Gardia…it was him that made the call the CPS and now it seemed that he was hell bent on following Lexa, and the more it played out in front of her eyes, the more the words replayed in her mind the more she could only think that he wanted one thing…..he wanted Lexa gone…..FOREVER….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo what does everyone think?...So Raven has finally discovered Roans seeming obsession with following Lexa…but what are his intentions? Why is he following Lexa? Is it for him or his Sister? SO MANY QUESTIONS lol…The main one….What will Raven do?...well The Next four chapter will be longer than this one as I aim to throw in a lot including flashbacks....But anyways I'll let you all get one with life and your day...or night...or evening...whichever applies :-) As always please feel free to leave a comment...


	27. Decisions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***TRIGGER WARNING***
> 
> Hey Everyone, Thank you to everyone that has commented, gave kudos or bookmarked this story/last chapter, just a small warning that this chapter contains scenes of mild violence so please read carefully.

** Chapter 27-Decisions **

**Raven and Octavia’s House-14:00**

Octavia was just about to sit down on the couch in the living room after just placing Zachary down for his early afternoon nap. Zachary had fallen asleep pretty much as soon as she put him in the car, the teachers had told her he’d spent the whole morning running around and had spent the hour and a half before she picked him up learning how to count from 1 to 10. She loved picking him up from nursery mainly because every single time without fail he would see her and smile massively before taking off running towards her with everything her had. And everytime she’d swoop him up and hug him tightly as he giggled and told her he missed her. She’d did as she normally did and got him into the car, strapping Zachary into his car seat before driving home, within five minutes of her driving off her son was fast asleep in the back of the car. Once she’d parked up on the driveway she carefully removed him from the car seat careful not to wake him up, she carried him upstairs and put him in his bed before closing the door behind her making sure the baby monitor was on. Octavia had been slightly surprised at how easily Zachary had fallen to sleep, normally she’d get him home about 14:00 and he’d be awake until 15:00 fighting off the tiredness as he played with his toys, his eyelids closing and opening continuously, she’d have to lift him up and carry him around with her continuing to walk all around the house and the mainly the living room until he fell asleep against her chest his small breaths getting heavier and deeper as he slept.

 

Just as about she was her butt was about to land on the couch she heard knock at the door, grunting and pushing herself back up so she was standing, she walked over to the door opening it, to her surprise her eyes fell on her wife standing on their porch pacing back and forth her left hand balled up in a loose fist whilst her right hand clicked and clapped into her fist repeatedly. Octavia instantly knew Raven was anxious about something, this was something Raven always did when something was weighing down on her mind and making her worry so much she couldn’t turn her brain off. She was about to speak when Raven turned to face her stopping herself from pacing she looked at Octavia instantly starting to talk;

 

“I’m sorry to come by like this, I know I should have called and that Zachary is probably asleep…. I just found something out and I don’t know what to do….and I needed to talk to someone and the only person I could think of was you…because I can’t tell Lexa this I just…”

 

“Rae...” Octavia spoke stepping forward placing her hand on her wife’s right arm gently pulling on it “It’s completely fine…come inside…now” Raven softly smiled letting her wife pull her inside the house, once Raven was inside the house Octavia closed the front door quietly, locking it as she did so. Pulling Raven to the couch she was about to sit down on moments ago, pushing her wife’s chest slightly until she was sitting down on the couch “Stay here and I’ll get you a coffee” Raven just nodded her head at her wife’s words, disappearing into the kitchen she emerged from the kitchen minutes later carrying two cups of coffee with her, walking back over to Raven she sat down next to her handing her one of the cups. “Take a few minutes and then you can tell me what’s going on” Octavia tried her hardest not to look at Raven too much in the minutes that passed she found it harder not to look at her wife, especially when in the corner of her eye she saw Raven’s left hand tapping on her left thigh as she held her coffee in her right hand. After giving Raven a minute or two to drink some of her coffee and compose herself she placed her cup on the floor turning herself slightly making it easier to look at Raven “So let’s start from the beginning…what’s going on? And why were you so agitated?”

 

“I found something out and I’m not sure what to do”

 

“What kind of information Rae?”

 

Raven looked at her wife for a second, somehow in her deep thoughts after she and Monty had discovered the security footage and heard Roan’s voice on the CPS call, she’d only been able to think about one person and that was Octavia, she knew she had to tell Lexa and Clarke she knew that was something she could hide from them no matter what she thought was best. But at that moment in time, the only person she could think of talking to was Octavia, she knew her wife could help her through her thoughts and make her mind a little clearer on the matter. She knew Lexa had an appointment with a new client at 14:30 an appointment her sister had told her she was happy to take on her own after she’d called her telling her she needed to talk to Octavia about something important. She also knew that meeting gave her time to work out exactly what she was going to do. “Information about who called CPS on them?”

 

“How exactly did our find out this information?”

 

“That doesn’t matter right now”

 

“It does if you broke the law Raven”

 

“I didn’t break any laws….technically speaking”

 

“Technically speaking?”

 

“Yes….”

 

“Hacking a government protected database and obtaining information illegally isn’t technically breaking the law?”

 

“No, it’s completely breaking the law”

 

“Then how did you not break the law?”

 

“I watched…Monty did the actual hacking…. I tried but couldn’t get through…there were a lot of numbers and it messed with my head…”

 

Octavia looked at her wife she really wanted to shout at her for being stupid enough to try and hack the CPS database but she could see that whatever was bothering Raven was serious and she also wasn’t in Ravens good books completely so shouting at her surely wouldn’t work in her favour. So instead she took a deep breath in and gritted her teeth slightly as she asked, “Why did you even hack them?”

 

“Lexa got a bad feeling that Roan was following her and I wanted to check it out, I didn’t think that she was actually right”

 

“Hang on I’m confused what has any of this got to do with Roan?”

 

Raven looked at Octavia internally thinking about whether she should tell Octavia that whole story, she knew there was a reason she’d ended up at the place she still thought of as home. She needed to process everything and to do that she needed to tell someone about what she found out and the only person she felt she could trust was Octavia, she knew she could trust Lexa and Clarke but neither of them could find out yet, not until she had processed this she needed to work out the answers before she told her twin sister what was going on. And more importantly what she’d found out about Roan. She noticed how silent Octavia was, like she was letting her decide whether she was going to tell her what she was thinking. Taking a small breath, she decided that she was right and needed to trust herself and her natural instincts to talk to her wife. “I know right now secrets aren’t a good thing or me and you…and I’m not taking a shot at you, I just need you to promise me that you won’t tell Lexa or Clarke anything I say to you?”

 

“Why wouldn’t I be able to tell them?”

 

“Because it’s pretty big, and I know you promised me no more lies but I’m asking you to make a promise to me that you won’t tell them something that I’m going to tell them anyway…I swear I’m going to tell the tonight so it’s not really lying to them it’s just avoiding telling them until I’ve had a chance to put some things in place”

 

“Raven…. I don’t know…I…lying is lying and this sounds really big…”

 

“Please Octavia…I need you to tell someone this…. I need your view on it and what I should do…I know it isn’t okay of me to ask you to do this but I swear I’m going to tell them tonight…. please I just need you to promise me that you won’t tell them today….”

 

“Just today…. if you don’t tell them today then I can?”

 

“Yes, I promise you”

 

“Ok”

 

“Ok?”

 

“Yes ok…. I promise I won’t tell them what you tell me”

 

“Thank you” Raven genuinely responded smiling at her wife as she adjusted herself slightly so she was facing Octavia a little more, so they were almost face to face with their shoulders leaning against the back of the couch as they faced each other. “So, a few days ago when we were at the park with Clarke, Lex, the twins and Zachary, you remember I was looking at pictures on Clarke’s phone?”

 

“Yeah, what has that got to do with any of this?”

 

“When I was looking at the pictures Olivia wanted to show me, I noticed someone in the background of one of the pictures….it was Roan”

 

“What do you mean it was Roan?”

 

“There was a picture of Clarke and Lexa in the cinema about to see a film, and behind them was Roan…”

 

“That could be completely innocent Rae”

 

“I know that and I didn’t think it was anything at first, but I still had to tell Lexa either way….so I showed her”

 

“And what did she say?”

 

“She told me she believed me then we got talking and she told me that she thought Roan was the one that made the compliant to CPS. We talked more about it and she told me that Olivia had seen the bad man a few times when her and Oscar were playing the garden…”

 

“And Roan is the bad man…. but that could be her imagination”

 

“That’s what I thought, but Lexa told me a few more things and we got talking a little more, she told me that she thought she was being watched a few times when she was on her at the studio. I thought it was just her imagination or that she was overreacting to me seeing Roan in that picture….so did she…without any proof we couldn’t do anything and she was losing it a little so, thinking that it was nothing I told her to just enjoy the day and we’d talk about it more later”

 

“And did you?”

 

“No…I wanted to look into the security footage first”

 

“So, Lexa never asked you to illegally hack the CPS database?”

 

“No, she has no idea me and Monty did that and I know she’s gonna be pissed off at me…. but what I found out is massive enough that I know she’ll forget anything illegal I did”

 

“Ok, you told me what lead you to looking into the security footage and stupidly hacking in the CPS Database, breaking a whole list of laws…mainly federal laws at the time…. now tell me what you found”

 

“Monty managed to find what we needed quickly”

 

“And what was that?”

 

“The anonymous complaint made against Clarke and Lexa”

 

“Ok, and after you found that, what exactly did you find?”

 

“Well firstly we had to download it and that took a while, so whilst we did that we looked at the security footage of the last few times Lexa was at the studio on her own”

 

“Did you find anything?”

 

Raven took in a small breath before closing her eyes for a second, reopening them she looked at her wife and simply replied “Yes”

 

“What did you find Raven?”

 

“We brought up the last four times Lexa had been alone in the studio, and at the same time on every single one, as Lexa leaves she locks up enters all the security codes and then makes her way to her car. She gets in and you don’t see anything go on…. not for a few minutes…then you see Roan…. he comes from behind the studio like he’s been hiding there or inside somehow…. then he just watches her car drive off and leaves….”

 

“Are you sure Raven? You couldn’t have mistaken some homeless man for Roan or just another man for him?”

 

“There’s no possible way….” Raven paused for a second, she knew nobody would believe her so she’d made sure she had evidence to show them. Reaching into her pocket she pulled out her phone, unlocking it and going to the app she’d installed that allowed her to view and save important pieces of footage from the security system straight onto her phone. Opening the app, she pulled up the most recent footage shot, holding it in front of her wife she softly added “Here…. see for yourself…. I have it saved so I can show Lexa and Clarke…”

 

Octavia cautiously took the phone from Raven looking down at the paused footage on her wife’s phone. Pressing play she watched the footage play out on the screen, she watched hoping that Raven hadn’t seen what she said she had, she was disappointed when the footage played out her eyes casting over everything Raven had just told her about. And just like Raven had told her it was Roan, there was no mistaking him for anyone else. She watched until the clip stopped playing, looking up at her wife and handing the phone back to Raven. Staring at her blankly as she processed what she’d just seen, blinking a few times she softly asked “What does that mean Rae? You said you watched four different nights, right?”

 

“Yes, and every single one was the same…he did that exact same thing in every single one…. but that’s not all I found O”

 

“The CPS call?”

 

“Yeah, it was him….no doubt about it…Monty sent me over the file I can….”

 

“I don’t wanna hear it Rae…. I believe you, seeing the footage was enough for me”

 

“Ok…I won’t make you feel uncomfortable”

 

“What are you going to do now?”

 

“I’m gonna tell Clarke and Lexa, I swear that…I just don’t know how I’m going to tell them”

 

There were minutes of silence between the women as Octavia processed the information and Raven allowed her to, knowing that she herself had struggled with it hours ago. She’d struggled and the whole reason she’d ended up where she was now, at the place she called home for years, in the home she’d shared with Octavia since they got married was because she needed to talk to someone, and that someone was her wife. No matter what problems they were having Octavia could always calm her down and help her see things a little clearer. The silence continued between them until Octavia asked;

 

“Why did you come here Rae?”

 

“Because I needed you, you’re the only person that can keep me calm enough to help me process everything”

 

“Except Lexa, and you couldn’t go to her”

 

“I can leave if you want me t…”

 

“NO…I don’t want you to leave, I just wanted to know…. Thank You…. for trusting me and for coming here”

 

“Thanks for letting me in”

 

“Your welcome…. I think that you need to get some more evidence…I know you have the tape and the footage but the tape isn’t something you can use you know that…. but your right the first thing is telling Clarke and Lexa…you need to tell them every single thing even the illegal stuff…then you need to work out if it’s just Lexa that he’s following…”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I mean, was he following Clarke as well…or is he targeting Lexa”

 

“Targeting?”

 

“There’s not many reasons you follow someone Raven…. it’s either your job, for personal reasons or for someone else…. The first one isn’t an option because he’s not a cop or a Private Investigator…which means he’s either following her for something he wants or he’s following her for someone else…. Either way, whoever he’s following her for its not likely that those four camera shots are the only times he’s been caught on camera….”

 

“What makes you say that?”

 

“The way he moved around in the footage he knew where he was going and what Lexa’s routine was…. like he’d seen her do it before…and the only way for that is for him to have followed her before….”

 

“You think he’s been watching her for a while”

 

“It’d make sense Rae…I don’t know I’m not a cop…I just know that this doesn’t feel like a once off….he made the complaint that’s intentional, and following her on more than one occasion is anything but unintentional…He’s been following her, no matter the reason he’s done it on purpose...What that purpose is, I don’t have any idea”

 

“So what do I do O?”

 

“You stay strong for Clarke and Lexa, like you always are Rae….I know this is hard because your processing it, and I get your scared and worried but I know you and I know that you can do this…you can be there for them…you’ve already done the biggest thing, you’ve found out something’s wrong and now they can stop it…I think that you knew exactly what you needed to do before you got here….you just needed to process a little yourself…”

 

“I don’t know if your right, I don’t know if I can tell them this and be strong for them…because I’m scared...of what it means of what it could mean…”

 

“Stop thinking too much…I know that this is a lot to take in, but nothing bad has happened and you’ve found out something that Lexa and Clarke are going to love you for….you found out that Lexa was right, and that someone has been following her, yes that in itself sucks but you can’t defeat an enemy if you don’t know what they look like…”

 

“You really think it’s that simple…. that they won’t be mad at me?”

 

“Why would they be mad at you? … you broke the law to find out who made a complaint against them…Lexa might be mad about you breaking the law to help her…but she’ll appreciate that you love her enough to break the law…and Clarke, she’ll love you because you care enough to make sure Lexa wasn’t imagining things and to find out who made a false complaint against them…and they won’t be mad because you lied for a few hours, what harm has come from it?...none that’s what”

 

“Thank you…. I guess I just needed to talk it through with you…”

 

“That was always your thing….” When Raven looked at her questioningly she explained “You’re a thinker, you find something out and you just continue to think about it, going over and over every single detail in your mind until it feels like your heads about to explode…you don’t talk about it because you think it doesn’t matter, that the only reason thinks are so bad is because they are in your head…” Smiling a little more Octavia looked down at Raven’s hand nervously tapping on her left thigh still “You already know what to do you just don’t think you do, it’s not until you speak to someone that you realise that you knew exactly what to do and how to do it”

 

“In that case I’m sorry for wasting your time…”

 

“You didn’t waste my time at all…. I like that you came to me….it makes me feel like I’m still your safe place…” Octavia responded with a genuine smile, it wasn’t forced in anyway, not like the ones she’d had on her face whenever she’d seen Raven and had to pretend that she was fine and wasn’t completely lost without the brunette. As she forced herself to keep looking at Raven their eyes locked onto each other’s, their breath catching at the same time as they looked into each other’s eyes for seconds, seconds that felt like hours. The look was broken when Raven blinked clearing her throat nervously before she softly responded;

 

“You are my safe place”

 

“Still?”

 

“Of course…. I feel like I can tell you anything in the world, and no matter how bad it was to the outside world you’d accept it and let me talk about it. And still love me….I love that feeling” There was another moment of silence between them as their heart both skipped a beat making it hard for them to find words “Anyway, I um…I didn’t tell you one thing”

 

“What didn’t you tell me?”

 

“After I heard the complaint and realised it was Roan…I um, I looked into the security footage more…”

 

“And what did you find?”

 

“Roan did exactly the same thing I showed you on at least six other occasions, our footage covers about three months before its deleted…the um…the night you told me about you seeing Monroe still he was there”

 

“What do you mean he was there?” Octavia asked ignoring the pain and sadness she felt at the memory of that whole night

 

“He did something similar to what he did in the video you watched, the only thing that was different is he was actually inside, I think he was watching me and Lexa when we were talking…I had the music up loud so we wouldn’t have heard any noise he made…and Lexa left the door unlocked when she came in, he watched through the reception door for a minute or so then went inside…and he only comes out about two minutes before me and Lexa do….”

 

“Have you called the police yet?”

 

“No…. I wanted to talk to Lexa and Clarke first, I don’t know what this is, I don’t even know how to process all the information…its like my brain is overloading…I mean what if he’s following her now, or if he’s watching Clarke and the twins now….”

 

“Hey calm down….we can work this out together….We can go online and find out the procedure, what Lexa and Clarke have to do to stay safe…what they have to say when they report it at the station….it’s okay Rae….just stay calm….” Octavia soothed reaching forward and without a second thought taking Raven’s hand in her own, interlocking their fingers knowing it helped calm her wife instantly.

 

“Thanks” Raven let out, that was all she could get out at that moment, she’d been holding in her worry and anxiety at all she’d found out over the last four hours and now it was ready to explode. That was until Octavia spoke and placed her hand on top of her own, and then it was almost bearable like she could handle it as long as she had that hand on her own. She felt stupid for feeling like that, but at the same time she felt invincible like she could handle anything life threw at her. 

* * *

 

** Twin Heda Records-14:00 **

Lexa was sat in the studio waited for her 2pm appointment to arrive, she wasn’t even sure what this company wanted from her and Raven. She’d never heard of RNG Records before and when she’d looked them up nothing had come up, which left her very limited on what she could do to prepare for the meeting. But none the less she did the normal things she’d do, taking small notes of questions to ask when they arrived. Small questions that she knew always impressed when she asked them. After a while she beginning to get bored as the time ran on nobody had arrived, thinking nothing of it she pulled her phone out deciding to call and check in her wife, pressing Clarke’s contact name in her phone **(My One -True Love-)** bringing the phone to her ear as it rang, within seconds Clarke had answered the phone;

 

“HI MAMA”

 

“Hello Princess…Where’s Mommy?”

 

“Mommy’s making more coffee Mama…..she said I can talk on the phone”

 

“She did?”

 

“Yeah…because she knew it was you Mama”

 

“And how did Mommy know that?”

 

“Because it says so on the phone”

 

“That it does….so how are you feeling Princess?”

 

“Good Mama…Mommy put some special cream on my chin”

 

“Did it make you feel better?”

 

“Yeah, it doesn’t hurt a lot anymore Mama”

 

“That’s so good to hear…how was Nursery Today Princess?”

 

“Good Mama…. but we have to go back for Oscar…cause Mommy took me to see Grandma”

 

“I know she did baby…. remember we talked about it last night…” Lexa couldn’t hold back the smile and small laugh that escaped her as she listened to her daughter giggle on the other end of the phone as she remembered the conversation from last night “Remember now?”

 

“Yeah Mama…I remember now” Olivia let out a pure happy laugh as she continued to talk “I forgot it Mama…silly billy Olivia…. but I remember it all now”

 

“What do you remember Princess?” Clarke’s voice asked on the other end of the phone as the sound of footsteps got closer to the phone. Lexa could just imagine Clarke walking back into the room, walking up to their daughter and ruffling the hair on the top of her head as she held her coffee in the other hand, before sitting down on the couch quickly followed by Olivia

 

“I forgot what Mama told me about Grandma Yesterday Mommy….it was funny”

 

“I bet it was…. but you can’t forget what Grandma told you, can you?”

 

“No Mommy I can’t…. I have to clean it every morning and night Mommy…otherwise it could go bad and Grandma said that is bad…”

 

“Exactly my smart little princess….” Clarke responded, all Lexa could hear on the other end was a kiss being placed, she assumed that it was on Olivia’s cheek from the volume of the kiss. “Can I talk to Mama now?”

 

“Yes Mommy…. Bye Mama, I’ll see you in hours…. I love you Mama”

 

“I love you too Princess…. see you very soon…” Lexa smiled hearing her daughter’s soft giggle before there was a shuffle on the other end of the phone for a second or two before Clarke’s voice filled the line

 

“Hey baby”

 

“Hey”

 

“How’s your day going? …Aren’t you meant to be in a meeting right now?”

 

“It’s been okay, I little boring without two four-year olds to run around after…and yes I am meant to but they haven’t shown up so I thought I’d call you and see how your day is going…”

 

“Any specific reason?”

 

“No, I just wanted to talk to you”

 

“Liar…. Lexa I told you I’m fine…honestly I’m not angry at you…more relieved actually”

 

“Your relieved that I told you I was feeling angry and resentful?”

 

“Yeah I am….we promised that we’d talk things through and that’s what we are doing, I know your anger was aimed at me because I exposed the twins to Roan and the madness that comes with his family….It hurt a little I won’t lie but now I know what your side of things is, I understand and I’m not blaming myself like you made me promise not too….I get it Lexa, your angry at me…”

 

“I was….”

 

“You’re not angry anymore?”

 

“Not at you…I’m angry at whoever is trying to pull us apart…I am sorry for upsetting you”

 

“It’s okay…you apologised yesterday and I forgave you…and you let me watch Bambi which I kow you hate so I think we’re even now…”

 

“Are you sure we’re okay?”

 

“I’m sure Lexa….we talked it through and like I said, I understand why you were angry….and like you said your not angry at me anymore right?”

 

“Not at all”

 

“Then we can move on…. just promise me that it won’t take Raven telling you to talk to me for you to actually ralk to me”

 

“I promise…I just didn’t wanna lose you again”

 

“Not going to happen…even if you want to leave you can’t…”

 

“That’s never gonna happen”

 

“What isn’t?”

 

“I’m never going to leave you…. not as long as I’m breathing…”

 

“Good because I don’t want you to leave…. ever…”

 

“Well at least we’re both agreed on that”

 

“Exactly…. anyway, we need to talk about some other business”

 

“And what business may that be?”

 

“You still didn’t tell me what made you write that song about me”

 

“Its all in the song title really Clarke”

 

“Perfect?”

 

“Yeah, I wrote it because your perfect in my eyes…always were and always will be”

 

“You Alexis Woods are a charmer and I’m going to thank you properly later”

 

“You are huh?”

 

“Oh definitely…in so many ways you can’t even imagine”

 

Before Lexa could answer back to Clarke’s flirt remark the intercom buzzed, pressing the button Maya’s voice flowed through ‘Your 2pm appointment is here Ms Woods’. Letting out a loud groan, Lexa let out a small breath before softly speaking “Sorry babe, I have to go my 2pm appointment has decided to turn up now”

 

“No problem….we’ll continue this later on”

 

“Hell yeah we will…I’ll speak to you soon…I love you”

 

“I love you too…bye”

 

“Bye” With that Lexa removed the phone from her ear ending the call and placing the phone back in her pocket before standing up and walking to the door, opening it up she was met with the image of Maya with a knife held to her neck as Roan stood behind a firm grip on the handle of the knife as his venomous eyes looked at her. “Roan what the hell are you doing?”

 

“I’m sorry Ms Woods…. I didn’t know what else to do…he told me he’d kill me” Maya emotionally let out, tears beginning to rush down her cheeks as she felt the cold blade of the knife pressing into her skin as Roan spoke into her ear;

 

“Look the door now” He ordered as the door behind them closed and he turned Maya to face the keypad on the right hand side of the door. Maya did as she was ordered entering the code that locked the door, hearing it lock before Roan forced her back around to face Lexa.

 

“It’s okay Maya…just stay calm ok…”

 

“DON’T THINK ABOUT MOVING” Roan loudly let out his voice just as venomous as his eyes as they bore into Lexa. “You know you shouldn’t lie Lexa…. it’s not a good example to set….” Roan let out an evil laugh as his forced Maya to walk forward into the recording studio, closing the door behind them before tightening his grip on the knife and on Maya “Nothing’s going to be fine Lexa…nothing at all…” 

* * *

 

** Raven and Octavia’s House-14:30 **

Octavia had kept her hand on top of Raven’s, keeping their finger’s locked as they sat in silence nothing being said since Raven last spoke. Her words of Thanks still happily playing again and again in Octavia’s ears. Before either of them could find the words to talk, the sound of Zachary crying came rushing through the monitor to Octavia’s left, smiling at Raven she gently removed her hand from Raven’s standing herself up and walking to the stairs, climbing them and walking up to the bedroom where she found her son standing in his cot his eyes searching for his Mommy in his bedroom. As she walked into the room and into his line of sight a massive smile spread across Zachary’s face, his face filling with tired excitement as she walked closer;

 

“Mommy”

 

“Hi baby boy…. how was your sleep?” She softly asked lifting him from out of the cot and onto her chest. Zachary instantly leant his head forward leaning it against his Mommy’s shoulder.

 

“Good”

 

“That’s nice…are you hungry?” Zachary shook his head against his Mommy’s shoulder “You still a little tired baby?” Zachary softly nodded his head against his Mommy making Octavia smile softly, she loved when Zachary had just woken up, he was so clingy and cuddly and would hold onto her like his life depended on it. It always made her feel like she was wanted and needed, and that was the best feeling in the world. “Let’s go downstairs and see if we can help you wake up a little” Placing a gentle kiss on the side of her son’s head as she walked to the bedroom door, walking through it and heading back downstairs to Raven. As she finished walking down the staircase she walked over to Raven sitting down next to her, noticing the smile on her wife’s face as she sat down, as she sat down Zachary turned his face the other way and finally noticed his Mama sitting on the couch, a massive smile spread across his face as he sat up and reaching his arms forward to his Mama.

 

Raven smiled at her son leaning forward slightly she lifted her son from her wife’s arms and onto her chest. As soon as he was against her chest Zachary relaxed into her chest, resting his head on her shoulder. Leaning back on the couch she gently stroked his hair, taking in the smell of her son, it was like no smell in this world a mixture of baby lotion and powder, and laundry detergent mixed in with baby shampoo and a multitude of different smells all mixing together to form their own smell. Something she missed more than she could even say. As she got lost in her thoughts she felt Zachary moving on her chest, exchanging a small smile with Octavia she looked down seeing her son smiling up at her “Hey Sleepy” She softly cooed at Zachary gently removing some of his hair from over his eyes.

 

“Mama” Zachary half giggled smiling brightly at his Mama as his hand reached up gently placing his hand on her neck holding onto the lining of her shirt.

 

“That’s me….how was your nap handsome?”

 

“Great Mama” He softly responded leaning his head forward again, resting his head against her shoulder looking towards his Mommy smiling brightly.

 

“That’s good….are you still sleepy?” Zachary nodded his head into her shoulder gently “Would you like some warm milk to wake you up?”

 

“Yes please Mama”

 

“Ok then”

 

Raven stood up lifting her son with her going to walk towards the kitchen, hearing her son’s voice she stopped walking listening to him “Come too Mommy” She smiled at the small boys words as she turned looking at Octavia softly nodding her head signalling it was ok for her to come with them. Octavia smiled brightly at the nod before standing up and walking over to her son and wife, smiling brightly as she walked over. Stopping in front of them she leant forward kissing Zachary on the top of the head before they all walked into the kitchen together. As they did Raven started to feel a little uneasy, she knew it wasn’t because of her and Octavia spending time together, it was something inside her that was making her panic something she couldn’t quite place her finger on, it was natural like she was getting a warning about something, but what that warning was about she had no idea. And she hoped to god that she’d work out what the feeling was about sooner rather than later. 

* * *

 

** Heda Twin Records-14:15 **

Lexa watched as Maya did everything that Roan told her to do moving forward and sitting down on the couch in the room before holding her hands in front of her. She watched as he removed a handful of zip ties from his back pocket throwing them on the couch next to Maya he removed a bunch zip-tying her hands before looking over at her. She was stuck in her place her hands up in the air not moving after Roan had told her not to, if this was just her life in the balance then she’d risk running and outfighting Roan but this wasn’t just about her, it was about Maya as well, as well as Clarke, the twins and Raven none of them would be happy with her if she risked her life trying to escape Roan. With those thoughts in mind, she decided very quickly that she’d stay where she was and buy herself time, time to find out what he wanted and what he was planning on doing exactly, and most importantly in her mind who he was after, although at this moment in time it was pretty clear to her that she was the target. Taking a breath in she forced herself to ask;

 

“What do you want Roan?”

 

Roan let out another evil and thick laugh as he looked at her stepping forward again retightening the grip on the knife in his hand, he turned his head slightly sideward laughing again before straightening his head and back at the same time “You know exactly what I want….what I wanted….but that never stopped you from taking it from me….”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“And here we go…playing dumb again…”

 

“I have no idea what your talking about…”

 

“I don’t know why your pretending for Lexa…it’s okay to admit you were wrong…” His eyes boared into her as he stepped forward violently and aggressively grabbing both her wrists, turning her around forcefully so her back was facing his chest, forcing her arms behind her he zip tied her hands together before roughly turning her back around and placing a firm hand on her right shoulder her pushing her down until she was forced to sit down from the amount of pressure and force he was applying. Once Lexa was sat down on the floor her back leaning against the control panel her and Raven had spent endless hours making music on. She remained silent letting Roan talk “You see you were always so arrogant about who you were, how smart you were….you never cared about what other people were feeling…..when you transferred to Arkadia High you didn’t care that you were taking over your sister’s life, or that Clarke was someone elses’, or even that you were someone else’s” At that moment it hit Lexa exactly what this was about, this was about Clarke and him wanting Clarke. “You acted like you owned that place and you looked down on me and my sister, and tehn you broke her heart”

 

“I didn’t break anyone’s heart….me and Nia were over long before I came to Arkadia, she chose to follow me there it wasn’t my decision…I told her I didn’t love her when she got that…she knew exactly how I felt she just chose to ignore it because she wanted something else”

 

Roan’s face contorted in anger and without warning her brought her arm back and followed through connecting his fist with Lexa’s face forcing her body to move to the right, grabbing her on the shoulders and forcing her so she was again sitting up straight he held his hand in front of her, his finger pointing at her “Don’t you dare blame my sister for any of this, this is on you…all she did was love you and all you did was use her”

 

“I didn’t use anyone…she was to clingy, always wanting to be around me…controlling who I spoke to when she was and wasn’t around…I got tired of it, I didn’t love her and I knew we were bad for each other…it wouldn’t have worked…”

 

“Maybe your right…maybe it wouldn’t have worked but you don’t have to ruin my life”

 

“Your life? …. your insane….you and Clarke have only ever been friends…”

 

“Insane?”

 

“Yeah” Lexa knew that was a bad idea to call him insane but she couldn’t help herself, this whole situation was insane itself. Just how bad of an idea it was, was confirmed when Roan pulled his arm back again punching her once more in the face then twice in the side sending a shooting pain through her body. Grunting in pain she spat out a small amount of blood that had formed in her mouth. Forcing herself to sit back up not wanting to show Roan that he was causing her as much pain as he wanted to or in fact was.

 

“You see there goes your big mouth again…. getting you in trouble just like back in high school, you know when Nia told me she was transferring to Arkadia I was stupid enough to think that she was doing it for me, I told her I missed her and she told me she was gonna force our parents to transfer her from that stupid military school you were both in. Then she got here and I found out that it was all……. about you…..amazing smart Lexa, that she wanted to prove you two were meant to be….” Roan shook his head slightly his eye grazing over for a moment before he sat down on the floor, grazing the blade of his knife over cheek before laughing softly and continuing “The more you got on with your life the crazier she got….and then it hit me, you were the reason she didn’t love me anymore….and then…. then you took Clarke from me too…”

 

Lexa licked her lips before turning her head and spitting more blood out of her mouth, then turning back to look Roan dead in the eyes “Clarke was never yours”

 

“That’s what she wants you to believe…. hell, that’s what she believes herself deep down because she knows it she knows that she was mine….”

 

“When exactly was she yours?”

 

“Since the day we meet…. we just had this connection, she got me…nobody has ever got me like that, not even Nia...she just understood me, no matter how bad or crazy my days got or were she knew what to say to make me feel better…even something small like offering me her strawberry milkshake at lunch…. I know you remember that and that you hated it because you knew it meant she loved me more…”

 

“That’s it…you think she loves you and she’s your because she ‘got’ you, because she was kind to you and listened to your problems and gave you strawberry milkshakes at lunch over the years…that’s ridiculous, she’s does all those things for friends, she did those things for you because you were her friend not because she was yours, or because she was secretly in love with you”

 

“You don’t know that”

 

“I do….because whether or not you want to hear it….I know Clarke…better than you ever will, she never loved you, and not because she isn’t into men but because she never saw you as anything more than a friend….until you fucked that up…you took things too far with her and now she doesn’t want anything more to do with you….especially after what you did to Olivia…..”

 

“SHUT THE FUCK UP….That wasn’t me…that was you, you gave Olivia that medicine all to get her to turn against me” Roan suddenly stood up leaning over Lexa, his eyes becoming wild with rage as he leant over her “This is all you and your mind games stealing what’s mine….first my sister then Clarke and with her my whole future…”

 

“Your wrong…..I would never in a million years hurt my daughter….because that’s exactly what she is mine…mine and Clarke’s”

 

“Exactly…..that should have been me and Clarke, our life, our house….our family….but you came along and ruined everything….that’s why this has to happen….see if CPS had done their job then none of this would be happening but that stupid BITCH Fox had to go ahead and dismiss the case….and why because she and Clarke are two dyke mommies’ bringing up twin children…I mean so what you had a terrible childhood, they should have seen it, I handed you to them on a silver FUCKING plater…but no they had to believe you…just like Clarke….you know I’ve never seen someone love so blindly that they don’t see the truth when their best friend tells them….”

 

“The truth?”

 

“Yes…. that’s what started all of this…” Roan let out roughly rubbing his forehead as he stood up and began walking around the room, pacing back and forth for a minute before stopping and looking at Lexa pointing the knife at her tightening his grip again “You fucked my sister and got away with it….you know no matter what anger or hatred I had for you, I held it back because I loved Clarke, because I could see you made her happy and I could see that you loved her too, that you would move heaven and earth to make sure Clarke was happy….and then you fucked Nia and I realised that everything I thought you were…everything I thought you’d do for Clarke was a game to you….you never loved her, just like with Nia…you played her and made her think that you loved her and what for….a life where you had sex on tap….what was it Lexa? And why would you bring kids into it huh? That’s what I’ll never understand about you, why you went to the trouble of marrying Clarke…...”

 

“I married her because I love her…. because she’s the woman I want to spend the rest of my life loving”

 

“Well that’s a shame because the rest of your life is about ten minutes long”

 

“What? …. your gonna kill me…to what? To get Clarke back….do you think for one second that if you kill me she won’t hate you for the rest of your life, you think killing me…the mother of her children will make her love you”

 

“I thought about that see…. she’ll get over it when she hears me out and understands exactly why I did it”

 

“She won’t forgive you…. she won’t understand”

 

“But she will….when she hears everything you did with Nia she’ll understand exactly why I did this….why I had to protect her from you and your lies….and then we can get on with our life together….”

 

“That’s never going to happen”

 

“It will….and nobody but me and her will know what happened to you…. not your pathetic sister and not your stupid children…”

 

“SHUT YOUR MOUTH” Lexa raged back, she could take Roan verbally abusing her and she could just about take him talking about Raven and Clarke, but there was no way she could listen to him bad mouth her children “You’re a psychopath who doesn’t even know how to comprehend someone not loving him back…. you’ve lost your mind….you really think that you can get away with this without anyone knowing….what about Maya? Maybe she’ll keep your secret through fear…. but then there’s the security footage, there are cameras everywhere we made sure of it, cameras that no doubt captured your face…security footage that can’t be erased without accessing the security database something only Raven and Monty can do…so sorry to tell you this but unless you plan on confessing and somehow convincing myself that killing me was okay, you aren’t getting away with anything….”

 

“NO…. NIA SAID…”

 

“And there it is…. Nia said…. still a little puppy following your sister blindly into the fire”

 

“SHUT UP” Roan yelled at the top of his voice using his free hand to slap his face almost snapping him into a trance “You’re just saying this to make me let you go…”

 

“No I’m not….look at me…I’m tied up in my own studio…there’s no way for me to escape…if you want to kill me then you can…but if I’m gonna die I’m not going to bite my tongue or tell you want you want to hear…I’m gonna tell you the truth and the truth is….your sister is a god damn liar who does and always has done whatever it takes to control you so you do all the dirty work for her….”

 

Roan’s face filled with anger as he looked at Lexa listening to her words, his eye were filled with anger towards her as he knelt back down “So come on then tell me the truth about my sister” He almost challengingly asked said a small smirk appearing on his face

 

“No…. not until you let Maya go”

 

Roan let out a chilling laugh as he brought the blade of the knife to Lexa’s shoulder tapping the edge on her shoulder before placing the tip on the flesh of her shoulder and applying pressure, dragging the knife downwards a few inches, watching as the pain filled Lexa’s face and she held back a moan of pain. Laughing he lifted the knife, releasing the pressure from Lexa’s skin. Wickedly smirking at her he laughed again before simply replying “Ok” Roan looked Lexa in the eyes for a second before he stood up walked over and grabbed Maya, grabbing her by the arm he lifted her up forcing her to stand, tears rushing down her eyes as she looked at Lexa and mouthed ‘Thank You’ to which Lexa simply nodded. Roan dragged Maya to the door “Enter the code” Maya again did as she was told entering the same code she entered beforehand. Roan pulled the handle of the door with the hand that held his knife, once the door was open he pushed roughly on her back sending her through the door and onto the floor. “Don’t call anyone” He ordered before letting go of the door and turning back to Lexa with a massive smile on his face:

 

“Now where were we?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know what a terrible way to end it lol But I LOVE my cliffhangers 


	28. Something's Wrong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: PLEASE BE ADVISED THAT THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS HIGH VIOLENCE AND GRAPHIC DECRIPTIONS THAT SOME MAY FIND DISTRESSING SO PLEASE READ ON WITH EXTREME CAUTION. IF THIS DOES TRIGGER OR BEGIN TO TRIGGER SOMEONE THEN PELASE STOP READING AND MESSAGE ME PERSONALLY AND I WILL GIVE YOU THE CLIFF NOTES FOR THE CHAPTER. SO AGAIN POTENTIAL TRIGGERS AHEAD….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Everyone, Sorry for the delay in getting this chapter up everyone. There’s no real reason to be honest I’ve just been lazy and let myself keep pushing it back so for that I apologise....Anyways I hope you all enjoy it, there is a Trigger Warning on it so please be aware :-)

* * *

** Chapter 28-Something’s Wrong **

** Flashback-Eight and a Half Years Ago **

Clarke was walking through the hallway of Arkadia High School her mind completely on her phone. She's just finished her art class and along with a mass of other pupils she was heading to lunch, she was running slightly late and decided to text Octavia to let her know she was on her way to met her Raven and the others. She smiled as Octavia messaged her back saying she's met her there as she was still waiting for Raven to finish her physics class. She loved how wiped her friend was with Raven, after seeing Octavia pine for the brunette for over a year it was nice to see them together and to see her best friend so happy especially after her break up with Lincoln. She was just about to place the phone back in her pocket when it vibrated, looking at the phone she saw a message from Roan cancelling their study session due to him having family issue to deal with, if she was honest she was relieved she liked the boy as a friend but she could tell that he wanted something more from her and he was so far from her type she found it amusing but still was polite to him because over the last few years he’d actually been a good friend to her, whenever someone would hassle her and was rude to her he's always stand up for her even if he got detention because of this. And on a whole, he was a decent person, a little weird and mildly twisted at times but that was what people had told her, she'd never seen it first hand herself. As she continued to walk and look at her phone she was brought out of her thoughts about what she could do with her afternoon when something slammed into her legs forcing her to stop and control her body so she didn't her phone falling from her hands and sliding across the floor as a result. As she looked down at what she could have bumped into she was surprised to see a slightly scared looking little brunette girl standing in front of her no more than 7 year olds slightly shocked she looked up seeing a older brunette coming towards them and before she could apologise to the little girl the older brunette spoke:

 

"Costia, come here" Lexa firmly said, instantly Costia turned around running to her sister relief rushing through her face. As Costia reached her Lexa knelt down, once she was close enough Costia wrapped her arms around her sister, pulling Costia back she looked seriously into her little sisters eyes "You can't run off like that Cos, you could've got lost" Still see a little upset in her sisters face Lexa decided not to tell her off too much "I know your excited but you have to stay with me, ok?" Costia nodded her head "Good girl" Placing a kiss on her sisters forehead she hugged her again, her eyes looked straight ahead catching a young blue eyed blonde watching her actions as numerous teenagers walked around her and Costia. Giving Costia a minute she smiled at the blonde before pulling her sister back and softly asking her "Did you bump into that lady?" When Costia nodded her head she added "Okay, you know what you have to do right?" Costia nodded her head releasing her hold on her sister she held onto Lexa's hand forcing her sister to walk with her. Once she was as close enough she looked up at the Blonde and softly said:

 

"I'm sorry I bumped into you lady"

 

Clarke looked at the little girl listening to her words she could have swore her heart melting slightly at the guilty but sweet apology, smiling down at the little girl she softly accepted the apology "It's okay, It happens….how about you grabbed my phone for me and we call it even" She smiled pointing to her phone on the floor to her right near a locker of the now clearing hallway.

 

Costia looked around seeing where Clarke was pointing before looking up at her big sister her eyes asking for permission to retrieve the phone. Lexa nodded her head softly. Seeing the nod Costia smiled brightly turning and running quickly over to the phone carefully leaning down and picking up the phone, before turning around and running back to her big sister and the blonde lady, holding the phone up to Clarke she smiled “Here you go lady…Sorry”

 

Taking the phone Clarke smiled at the little girl “Thank you…and my name is Clarke”

 

The little girl looked up at her sister nervously, stepping back so she was closer to her big sister’s legs. Placing her hands on Costia’s shoulders as her little sister’s back hit Lexa’s upper thigh. Looking down at Costia and smiling she looked up at the blonde, who she had to admit was really beautiful and not in a made up princess doll kind of way she was beautiful in more of a natural beauty kind of way, ignoring her inner thoughts Lexa forced herself to speak “Sorry she gets a little shy introducing herself to people…. I’m Lexa…and this….” She paused looking down at Costia and squeezing her shoulders as her little sister looked up at her “This is Costia…”

 

“Hi” The little girl softly waved at Clarke making her smile softly, before her attention turned back to her sister “Can we go find her now Lexi?”

 

“Don’t be rude Cos, we introduced ourselves so now we have to let the lady introduce herself as well, if we don’t then we’re being rude and we not meant to be rude, are we?” Costia shook her head at her big sister’s question “Good girl…” Lexa looked back to the blonde really wanting to know her name “So like we said, I’m Lexa and this is Costia….and you are?”

 

“Nice to meet you both…I’m Clarke”

 

“Nice to meet you too Clarke…right Cos” Costia smiled brightly nodding her head as she looked at the blonde they now knew as Clarke “I couldn’t help but hear your looking for someone, can I help you find them?”

 

“YES…” Costia shouted making Clarke giggle softly, she watched as Costia moved forward quickly looking up at her. “Do you know where my sister is?”

 

“I might, what’s your sister’s name?”

 

“Ummm” Costia turned around looking at her big sister who gave her an encouraging nod, letting her know she could remember the name on her own, looking back to Clarke she said her sisters name “Raven…Reyes-Woods…” Costia hesitated for a second before looking back to her big sister seeing her nod, a smile spreading across her face.

 

“Rae? Your Rae’s little sister?”

 

“YEAH….She’s by big sister…but Lexi is my biggest sister” Costia sweetly responded, making Clarke smiled and giggle again. “Do you know where Rae Rae is?”

 

“I think so yes…let me double check ok?” Costia nodded her head, excitedly turning and running to Lexa and beginning to talk to her, Clarke smiled as she took in the sweet sight, as she did she had to admit that the older brunette was almost flawless, she looked like she was athletic and did a lot of sports and she had the perfect facial features, her eyes made her whole face complete like they completed the image of a goddess. Shaking her head forcing the thoughts out she remembered whose sister she was ogling and she knew Raven was protective from the way Raven spoke about Lexa. Looking down at her phone she pulled up her texts messaging Octavia asking her if Raven was out of physics yet, within a few seconds Octavia had responded with a NO, making the blonde giggle softly before she responded telling O not to move and that she was coming to them. Looking back to the two brunettes in front of her she softly spoke “I know where Rae is, I can take you there if you like?”

 

“Um, that’d be great thank you Clarke”

 

“No problem” Clarke smiled at the way the brunette said her name, for some reason it sounded different, the same yet so different at the same time, so much so it made her smile even more. She pointed behind the two brunettes softly saying, “The Physics lab is this way…” She walked towards them, seeing Costia reach up and take Lexa’s hand before they began following her. Ignoring the urge inside her to look back at the older brunette she walked the short distance to the Physics lab, round to the right walking a few steps before leading the two down a set of stairs, pointing as they turned left, they walked about twenty more feet before Clarke noticed Octavia standing outside the Physics lab. As her best friend saw her she smiled at her before her eyes caught the image of the two brunettes behind her.

 

Octavia studied the two brunettes behind Clarke, she scanned them over thinking about how she knew them both after a second or two it hit her and she let out a gasp, her hand shooting to cover her mouth so she didn’t scream or make any loud noises that would give away the surprise. Moving forward quickly she walked until she was in front of Lexa excitedly saying “Lexa…. oh my god…I can’t believe it…. does Raven know you’re coming? Of course, she doesn’t she’d be super excited and not spending way too much time sucking up to the teacher…. anyway, what are you doing here? And Costia oh my god you’re so big in person….and I’m talking way too much without introducing myself properly…. I’m O….”

 

“Octavia…. I know exactly who you are” Lexa smiled cutting Octavia off mainly through fear the woman would run out of oxygen and pass out. Stepping forward she pulled the girl gently into a hug for a second before releasing it and stepping back smiling brightly at Octavia “So to answer your twelve questions, No Raven has no idea I’m here or that Costia is here…Which you guessed because she would have been very excited…We’re here with our Mom and Stepdad Titus, plus our little brother but I can’t say why until I see Rae…And Yes Costia is a lot bigger in person” Lexa finished a smile still on her face as she laughed softly at Octavia’s slightly embarrassed expression. She watched as Octavia’s face filled with relief and her expression and her body language relaxed as she let out a sigh. “How long is she gonna be in there?”

 

“I have no idea, she does this all the time….she tries to get me in there as well but I can’t deal with all the science”

 

Lexa laughed softly at the comment “I know what you mean, nobody knows where she gets the love of science and blowing things up from” Lexa watched as Octavia laughed softly at her comment before visibly thinking and then speaking;

 

“Do you want me to try and get her out here?”

 

“Sure you can try”

 

“Great” Octavia smiled back before turning to the door stepping closer she peaked her head around the corner seeing her girlfriend standing at one of the counters in the science lab a vile of blue liquid in her right hand as her left hand moved along a lab book as she carefully read it, closely as she copied whatever was written in the book. Leaning half her chest against the frame of the door looking at her girlfriend before she let out a sigh and moan as she spoke “Baaaaaaaaaaabe…when are you gonna be done? …..I’m starving…”

 

The comment got Raven’s attention as she looked up from the book nearly dropping the vile she had in her right hand, removing her left hand she leant against it on the counter looking over at her girlfriend with a smile. “Hey…I’m sorry this is taking so long, but I cant get these two liquids to react and….” Raven instantly stopped herself laughing before smiling at Octavia and continuing “I’ll be done in twenty the most I promise, you go meet Clarke and the others I’ll catch up with you”

 

“But I wanna spend sometime with you….pretty please…”

 

“We spend loads of time together babe…I really need to do this”

 

“You always say that, you’ve always got some project, you know when I fell for you I didn’t know you were a pyromaniac”

 

“I’m not I just like things to work…..I promise I’ll make it upto you later…”

 

“Fine…” Octavia let out smirking at her girlfriend before turning making sure her ass was pushed out a little more than normal, looking back over her shoulder she noticed Raven shaking her head forcing herself to look back at the book. “Ok….you making me call in the big guns….I’m gonna call Lexa and tell her your not looking after yourself…”

 

“What now hang on babe…”

 

“Nope too late….I’m calling her now…” Octavia pulled out her phone smirking at her girldfried one last time as she saw her placing down all her items carefully. Stepping out of the room she heard Raven’s voice calling out behind her

 

“Come on babe, that’s way too drastic…”

 

“Too late…” Octavia smirked softly at Lexa before giving it a second and speaking a little louder than normal so Raven could hear her “Yeah, I’m sorry to bother you Lexa she just won’t listen to me….Uh huh I’ll put you on speaker now”

 

Lexa laughed softly playing along with Octavia keeping her voice as low as she could so she didn’t give away her being there in person “Raven…”

 

“Oh that is so uncoo…..” Raven started as she came out of the door stopping in her tracks as she instantly noticed her sister standing in front of her, she wasn’t sure what was going on or if this was even real, but she knew Lexa was standing in front of her. “Lexa?....” She asked, blinking her eyes a couple of times before she looked at Octavia seeing the massive smile on her girlfriend’s face followed by a simple nod “You’re here?”

 

“Yeah I’m here….and I’m real, your not hallucinating”

 

“Lex…” Raven let out with a massive smile before she took off lunging forward wrapping her arms around her twin sister. Hugging her as tight as she could, trying to ensure that this wasn’t a dream or a hallucination by any means. “You’re really here” She whispered into her twin’s ear unable to hold back a small rush of tears running down her cheeks, as it hit her just how much she’d missed her sisters and brother, and it was a lot more than she realised something she didn’t think was possible. Still holding onto Lexa as tight as she possibly could. “I’ve missed you so much” Minutes passed by before Lexa forced a small amount of space between them smiling at her twin reaching up and wiping away the tears quickly;

 

“You ok?”

 

“Umm…” Raven sniffed back a few times before removed her arms from their place still around her sister. Taking a step wiping her face again she smiled back at her sister. Realising Clarke and Octavia were still watching them. “Yeah I’m good….so what are you doing here?”

 

Before Lexa could speak Costia stepped in-between her sisters her back to Lexa as she looked up at the big sister she hadn’t seen in months, softly smiling she spoke “We came to see you Rae Rae”

 

Raven’s face lit up even more as she leant forward slightly lifting her little sister off the floor and into her arms, hugging her tightly for a minute or two before pulling back and looking at her little sister. Taking in how much she’d grown since she saw her months ago “You’ve gotten so big Costia….”

 

“I know, I’m 6 now Rae Rae”

 

“I know you are, I’m really sorry I missed your birthday”

 

“It’s okay Rae, Lexi said that you had to go to school….so did I….Mommy and Daddy wouldn’t let me stay home….and then they didn’t let me call you Rae Rae, I really wanted to but they said No…”

 

“It’s okay Cos…Lexi told me how much you wanted to talk to me…she even told me that you hit your Daddy because you were upset”

 

“I did….But Lexi made me say sorry and I did because I’m not meant to hit people”

 

“No, your not….”

 

“I missed you loads and loads Rae” Costia sweetly said keeping her arms firmly wrapped around her sister’s neck, she leant forward kissing Raven on the cheek, before resting her forehead on her sister’s chin.

 

“I missed you loads and loads as well Cos” Raven smiled at the action kissing Costia on the forehead softly before moving her sister so her head was on her shoulder. Looking at her sister then back at Clarke and Octavia she looked back to Lexa softly saying “Should we get some food, because I’m really hungry and I wanna hear all about why your hear”

 

“Sounds perfect…. Lead the way” Lexa responded letting Raven walk in front of her as she was the one that knew where they were going. As they took a few steps forward Lexa looked back noticing that Octavia and Clarke hadn’t moved from their spots. “Come on then ladies…. No arguments, I wanna get to know you both” She smiled her eyes meeting for a second with the cute blonde with blue eyes, the same blonde she felt pulled to, she had no idea why but she was sure that soon enough she’d find out why. She watched as the blonde smiled back at her before moving forward falling into a conversation with her best friend as they walked to the cafeteria.

 

* * *

 

** Heda Studios **

** 16:00-Thursday 30th March 2017 **

Lexa was sat in her spot now regretting the decision to make sure Maya got out of the studio, she knew it was her best bet as the police being informed of Roan’s actions, but she also knew it was a massive risk considering how crazed Roan was acting right now. But now it was too late, she went with her instincts and now she had no choice but to try and keep Roan occupied and calm until the police could get to the studio. She watched as he paced backwards and forwards, after he’d let Maya out of the studio she chose not to answer the comment he’d directed at her. She was surprised when he didn’t fly into a rage but instead began laughing like he’d been told the greatest joke in the world. After his laughing faded his face became very serious and very angry instantly as he looked at her waiting for her to answer, when she again didn’t he began tapping the blade of the knife on the side of his neck, he did that numerous times before he began pacing. It’d been over ten minutes since he’d started his pacing and the constant pacing was getting faster and faster. She continued to watch him trying to judge, what he was doing and what his next action would be ignoring the pain that was stabbing at her right shoulder from the open wound. As she was about to speak he walked over to her kneeling down, pointing the knife at her as his face contorted slightly before he looked at her a smirk filling his face as he spoke;

 

“I’m only going to ask you one more time….and then I’m going open that wound on your shoulder even more” She could see that whatever calm was inside of Roan, whatever calm made him agree to let Maya go, was no longer there all she could see was anger and rage “You mentioned my sister…..now tell me before I make you tell me”

 

“Nia has been lying to you”

 

“And what exactly has she been lying about Lexa?”

 

“You said I fucked her….that’s a lie”

 

“So what she fucked you MASSIVE difference”

 

“No….nothing happened between me and Nia…..NOTHING….I would never in a million years cheat on Clarke, I saw enough of my fathers messes to see what that does to a person….and besides that, I haven’t wanted anyone but Clarke since the moment we got together…hell probably even before that….”

 

“And why exactly should I believe you huh? You could be making this up”

 

“She told you every single detail, right?”

 

“Yes, everything down to the scar on your hip”

 

“Exactly…. she’s wrong, I don’t have a scar on my hip…. not anymore”

 

“What do you mean not anymore?”

 

“I had a scar, and it’s still technically there…but I’ve had it covered….it has the date me and Clarke got married covering it, I got it done on our honeymoon…”

 

“So, what she got a small detail incorrect doesn’t mean she’s lying”

 

“No it doesn’t but she couldn’t have seen me naked….I couldn’t have fucked her without her seeing that tattoo and I know how evil and vindictive she can be, she wouldn’t hesitate to rub that in and tell everyone that I had a tattoo of the date me and Clarke got married on me and that she kissed all over that tattoo…..think about it Roan you know your sister and you know I’m right…”

 

“Maybe your right about that but that doesn’t mean she lied…”

 

“Why cant you just see it? Your sister lied to you to convince you to go after Clarke, I know your innocent in all of this…..you have to listen to reason here Roan”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because of Clarke”

 

“This is all about Clarke….I just want her to be happy…”

 

“Then think this through…..really think this through, would Clarke forgive me if I really cheated on her? Would she hug me and kiss me and tell me how much she loves me if I cheated on her….especially with your sister…. you say you know her”

 

“You could have convinced her to forgive you”

 

“You really think I could convince Clarke of anything….she knew about that tattoo I had and the only reason she forgave me was because she knew I didn’t have a scar anymore….She knows I didn’t cheat on her, she knows me better than most people….and she knows I didn’t cheat, so if she could believe me why can’t you, do you really think Clarke would risk the twin’s growing up with me knowing I was a cheat”

 

“No she wouldn’t…..but you could have….”

 

“Listen to everything your saying…. could have…..I couldn’t have done anything, she blocked me out for a year, she kicked me out completely and didn’t talk to me for almost as long….do you think me telling her something so small would have worked on her? Because we both know that Clarke is stubborn and nobody can tell her what to do….”

 

“I don’t get it….” Roan stood up his hand shooting to his forehead as he again began pacing backwards and forwards before he stopped slapping his own head a few times before he looked back to Lexa “I DON’T GET IT…. WHY…. WHY WOULD NIA LIE?”

 

“Because she knew that no matter what, no matter how much you loved Clarke, you couldn’t take me away from her…no matter how much you hated me for mistreating Nia or for whatever you hate me for, you couldn’t take something she loved so much from her, because you know it’d break her….”

 

There was a moment of silence between them both, a moment when Lexa watched on as Roan’s face softened and his body relaxed slightly. She didn’t dare to speak in case whatever she said angered him and ruined the obvious signs of him calming down. The silence was broken when Roan’s phone began to vibrate the sound of his ringtone filling the room, pulling his phone out of his pocket answering the call quickly;

 

“Nia, what is it?....No I haven’t stabbed her yet….yes I know what I said, maybe just maybe I’m gonna do this whatever fucking way I like Nia….I’m sick and tired of you treating me like a lap dog, like I’m some puppy that you can trick and make do whatever in the hell you want me to do….No Nia I’m done….why…..WHY…BECAUSE YOU LIED TO ME………” Lexa watched as Roan didn’t speak for a moment or two obviously letting his sister dig herself into a bigger whole “LEXA TOLD ME EVERYTHING…..” Roan let out a small laugh as his eyes filled with venom and anger, something that Lexa knew wasn’t a good sign “You and her never slept together…she never cheated on Clarke…you lied to me….….I DON’T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT ANYONE ELSE NIA…Your my SISTER, your not meant to lie to me, you think I would have turned my back on you…..look at everything I’ve done for you…I tried to get Clarke’s kids taken away from her….because I wanted to give you what you wanted….Lexa…..What exactly was me stabbing her meant to do Nia….because all I can see is me in a prison cell….you lied….you lied….so much, so many lies I can’t think straight….this is all your fault…..NO I don’t want to hear anymore, you lied about sleeping with Lexa, you lied about the cameras here….I bet you lied about Clarke saying she liked me as well….” When there was no response on the other end Roan knew he was right “This is all your fault Nia….BE A MAN?...Your right Nia I need to be a man and I will be because now you’re going to pay….You love Lexa like I love Clarke….and now you’re going to lose her just like I’ve lost any chance with Clarke…you gonna lose Lexa…you won’t have a choice because she’ll be dead….” Without another word to his sister he ended the call throwing his phone with force at the wall, it instantly smashed apart sending a cracking sound through the room. Lexa knew he’d thrown the phone but right now her eyes were glued on Roan, she’d heard every word he’d said and she knew he meant every single word he’s spoken to his sister and that wasn’t a really bad sign for her.

 

She continued to watch him hoping that he would calm down and that his words had been for show, she watched as his face and body language changed again, this time he seemed calm, almost like he was at peace with whatever he was about to do. Before she had a chance to say a word to him, Roan lunged towards her grabbing her, lifting her onto her feet and throwing her onto the couch before stalking over to her placing his knife between his jeans waistband and the belt he was wearing, the two materials pressing together and holding the knife in place as he began to rain down punch after punch on her. Lexa couldn’t think about anything but protecting herself, as the pain built with every punch she tried her best to protect herself from each punch as it came, hoping that Roan would tire and come to his senses soon.

 

* * *

  **Raven and Octavia’s House**

** In the Kitchen- 15:30 **

Octavia walked back over to the table where Raven was sat with Zachary on her lap, they’d just finished their coffees and Zachary had just finished his warm milk, so Octavia had placed all the cups in the sink and was now heading over to sit opposite her wife and son. As she sat down she smiled at her wife, she couldn’t help but think about how nice this was, how normal it was, and she knew it was all her fault but she’d lied so much and hid those lies for so long now that she wasn’t sure what she was meant to do or say, or how she was going to fix the heartbreak she’d caused Raven. In the small time they’d been apart she’d experienced a sadness she wasn’t even aware was possible to feel, and she wanted that sadness to disappear. Not just for her, but for Zachary, having to explain to him everything he woke up that Mama wasn’t home had become the worse part of her day. Taking a small breath in, she decided she was going to tell Raven what she’d be thinking about telling her since it happened two days ago.

 

“I need to tell you something”

 

Raven looked up from playing and talking to her son, looking at her wife and softly and calmly asking “Does he need to leave the room?”

 

“No, it’s nothing explicit and hopefully you wont be angry at me”

 

“I’ll try not to get angry”

 

“Thank you”

 

“So what is it?”

 

“Umm…two days ago I got a phone call….from Monroe…” Octavia noticed Raven instantly tense up and quickly spoke “I didn’t call her I swear and it’s not what you think…” Raven untensed a little before nodding at Octavia to continue “She called me, she told me that she and everyone else had heard you moved out, she asked me if now I was ready to go out with her….she asked me if wanted to meet up with her and go on a date…I said NO…Straight away, as soon as the words left her mouth, I said no…I wouldn’t and don’t ever want to go on a date with her…”

 

“Ok, so why are you telling me?”

 

“Because you asked me to be honest with you, and to tell you when things happen…you told me not to contact her either and I promised I wouldn’t, so I just wanted to tell you before you heard and it got completely twisted and you thought I wanted her to call…..because I didn’t…the call only lasted about a minute I can prove it…I can show you my p…”

 

“Octavia…it’s okay, I believe you….You don’t need to show me your phone”

 

“But I don’t mind, I know you want me to earn you trust back and I’m okay with that”

 

“Knowing you’d let me is enough for me okay?”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“I’m one hundred percent sure, the most important thing is that you told me….that’s all I want, I don’t want you to cut yourself off from me, I just want you to talk to me and tell me how your feeling…if things happen like that then I wanna know, just because you lied to me for so long doesn’t mean that I’m going to keep judging you or accusing you….you have to trust me to hear it and I have to trust you to tell me what I need to hear….fair enough?”

 

“Yeah….” There was a moment of silence before Octavia continued “Lonely”

 

“Lonely?”

 

“You said I have to tell you how I feel….and recently I feel lonely…I’m not saying it to make you feel guilty I just want you to know that’s how I’ve been feeling…”

 

“It’s okay….I’ve been feeling lonely as well…” Raven smiled at Octavia before looking down at their son resting his head against her shoulder peacefully “I’m so used to coming home to you and Zachary, and all the noise that comes with him, that sometimes I have to have TV on just so there’s some background noise to take away silence in the apartment… I get it O, we’ve been together for so long, and lived together for more than half our relationship, it’s bound to make us both feel lonely when we’re not together…and I know I’ve not really been talking to you much and I’m sorry about that….”

 

“You don’t need to apologise Rae”

 

“I do…because I promised that I’d work on things with you, and I’ve just buried my head in the sand and put everything into work, just to stop myself from accepting my side of things….I should have been talking to you when I pick Zachary up but I have to leave quick because if I don’t then I’m afraid I wont make it past the porch…but when we spoke on the phone the other night, it felt so good to just talk to you, to hear you talk about your day and the things Zachary got up to, like how he ran around our bedroom naked after his bath or how he makes funny noises to make you laugh….I miss hearing about all of that”

 

“I miss talking to you too”

 

“So maybe we can work something out….”

 

“Like what?”

 

“How about we talk every two nights on the phone, and if that works then maybe we can facetime for a bit…then we can work on the face to face stuff, like family days out and date nights…one step at time but I’m ready to completely try fixing this if you are…”

 

“I am” Octavia responded, she was just about holding back her tears of joy as she looked at Raven a massive smile covering her face, she really wanted to kiss her wife but this wasn’t the time to be pushing Raven and she knew it.

 

“Good then that’s settled, we can start tonight…is that okay with you?” Octavia just about managed to nod in response before Raven felt a sharp stabbing on her right shoulder like something sharp was being dragged over her skin “Arghhh” She let out making Zachary move on her lap, looking down at her son she softly said, “I’m sorry baby boy….” Seeing the look of concern on Octavia’s face she stood up carefully handing their son to her wife before turning her attention to her shoulder, pulling the material away from her skin she found nothing, no mark, no bruising, no disturbance to the skin what so ever. Looking to Octavia she softly explained “I don’t know what happened, I felt this sharpness going down my shoulder…but there’s nothing there”

 

“What could it have been?”

 

“I don’t kno….” Raven stopped herself in her tracks looking around for her phone, remembering it was in the living room she rushed into the room, seeing her phone on the couch she ran to it picking it up she noticed a missed call from Maya and one from Monty. Instantly a panic filled inside her, there were very rare occasions she’d feel pain and not have an injury, it didn’t happen very often but when she and Lexa were kids it happened all the time, whenever Lexa would fall over she’d feel the pain herself, she’d always thought it was something simple that could explain her feeling her sisters pain and Lexa feeling her pain but she never knew what that simple thing was.

 

“Raven, what is going on?” Octavia asked gaining Raven’s attention as she entered the living room carrying Zachary in her arms.

 

“I think something's wrong with Lexa”

 

“What makes you think that?”

 

“I don’t know O, I can’t explain it…it’s a feeling inside, I just I….I need to call Maya, I think something might have happened, it could be something simple…just give me a second” She said before pressing Maya’s name on her phone, she waited patiently not getting and answer the worry inside her rose even more. “Damn it” She let out pulling the phone from her hear, looking at the screen she noticed a new voicemail message, pressing on it she followed the instructions pressing the buttons she needed before listening to the message, instantly recognising Maya’s voice, as the girl softly and lowly spoke;

 

“Hey Raven it’s Maya…I need you to get to studio as soon as you can…Roan is here and he’s holding Lexa inside your studio…he’s um….He’s got a knife Raven and I’m not sure what he plans on doing….he told me not to call the police…he had me but Lexa convinced him to go…then he said no police but I know she needs help just….I’m gonna call them now so please hurry up because I think they’ll need you here…and so will Lexa….I’m gonna call Clarke as well…can you call me when you can please…bye”

 

Raven replayed the message one more time making sure that she wasn’t imagining what she’d heard. When she heard Maya’s words for a second time she froze on the spot, she didn’t know what to do, how could this be real, how could any of this actually be happening. And then she remember the pain she’d felt on her right shoulder, was that a sign was the something Roan had done to Lexa. Standing on the spot her phone dropped to her side and she stared at staircase the only thing in front of her. Tears began to fall from her eyes, and the next thing she knew Octavia was calling her name out asking her what was wrong. Then she felt Octavia’s hands on her shoulders and saw her wife was no longer holding their son, she could see the worry in Octavia’s eyes as she looked into her own. She blinked a few times before she plainly said “Roan’s holding Lexa at knife point”

 

“What?” Octavia asked confused she was hoping this was one of Ravens really unfunny jokes. “Your kidding right?”

 

“I wish….Listen” Raven lifted the phone in between them pressing the replay button again she handed the phone to Octavia. Watching as her wife listened to the call hearing every word she’d just heard. “See….not a joke” Tears rushed down her cheeks even more as she looked at Octavia hoping she’d know what to do now.

 

“Rae you have to go there….don’t put yourself in danger but Lexa’s gonna need you when she gets out of there”

 

“But…”

 

“Don’t worry about anything else, I’ll call Bellamy…he’s on duty and he can attend the call and he can drive past Clarke’s to make sure she’s okay…I’ll call her as well and take the twins for the afternoon so she can be there with Lexa as well…”

 

“No…Bellamy shouldn’t pick her up, it’s on my way to the studio. I’ll call her and pick her up…”

 

“Okay, I’ll follow in my car”

 

“Right…lets go”

 

Raven didn’t say another word, she watched as Octavia simply nodded and walked over to Zachary lifting him off the couch where she must have placed him. She walked straight to the door opening it and walking to her car, as she was jumping in the drivers seat Octavia came out of their front door her shoes on one hand and her keys in the other. Octavia nodded in her direction letting her know it was ok for her to go straight away. Turning on the engine she reversed the car driving towards Clarke pulling up the blondes number on her phone she pressed call waiting for an answer, within a second Clarke answered the call;

 

“Raven….please tell me Maya’s voicemail was a joke…”

 

“She didn’t speak to you directly”

 

“No I was playing with Olivia and I missed the call….well is it true?”

 

“I think so Clarke”

 

“What the hell do you mean you think so Raven? Your meant to be there with her aren’t you”

 

“I was but she told me she could handle it on her own, she wanted me to spend time with Octavia and Zachary”

 

“So what the hell is going on then? Is she safe? Is Roan actually holding her at knife point?”

 

“I think he is, I cant explain it I just know”

 

“Oh my god….so what….Umm ah what do we do?” Clarke’s asked her voice shaking slightly as she thought about all the things Roan could be inflicting on Lexa at this moment in time.

 

“Clarke it’s okay just stay as calm as possible…” Raven soothed hearing the upset in her sister in laws voice as she tried to concentrate on her voice, glancing into her rear-view mirror seeing Octavia’s car following her. “I’m driving to pick you up now…. Octavia is following me in her car with Zachary she’s gonna take the twins until we can get to Lexa and work out what’s going on….just hang in there for ten minutes Clarke, I’ll be there soon, just stay as calm as you can for the twins…”

 

“Okay…I’ll get Olivia ready Oscar is at Nursery until 4pm today then he needs to be picked up from adventure club…”

 

“Ok, get Olivia dressed and pack a bag for them both for the night just in case…just tell Olivia Zachary missed her and Oscar or something like that…I know it’s hard but try not to let her see your worried or upset…”

 

“I’ll try my best Rae…. see you soon…..and thanks”

 

“Don’t mention it….and your welcome Clarke, see you soon”

 

Raven disconnected the call turning her attention back to the road completely trying her best not to think about her sister and the trouble she could be in. She was thankful that so far, she hadn’t felt another burst of plate in anyway on any part of her body. As hard as she tried to block out the thoughts she couldn’t stop her mind from wondering how this would end and even more why this was happening, why was Roan doing all of this to Lexa and Clarke, this couldn’t be about him loving Clarke this was way too extreme for it to be about his unrequited and unreturned love. The more she thought about it the less sense it made to her.

 

* * *

 

  **Heda Twin Records Studio 16:13**

Lexa was still laying on the couch where Roan and left her after what felt like hours of punching her continuously, with every punch he threw his anger lessened slightly until he’d stopped and walked away sitting on a chair across the room from her. As she laid there she tried to work out how she was going to convince Roan that he didn’t have to kill her. She was trying her hardest to think of something but all she could think of was the twins and Clarke, of Raven and Costia and TJ, and how her being killed would affect them. She’d never once hated loving them all so much until now, because now that love was making it impossible to think about anything but them. She was trying her hardest not to let her tears spill from her eyes no matter what he did to her she didn’t want to cry, mainly through fear it would anger him even more. As she looked up at the ceiling memories of her and Raven decorating this room flashed in her mind, she remembered how it was the last time they’d been allowed to have TJ and Costia for a week, the last time she could remember seeing her little brother and sister in person, it’d been so long and so many things had gotten in the way of her and Raven seeing TJ and Costia, mainly their mother she’d always been difficult but they’d never thought that because they couldn’t forgive her, she’d keep Costia and Tristan away from them. It was only know that she wondered what her younger siblings thought of her and Raven, did they know they both tried their hardest and that it’s their mother stopping them seeing them both, she hoped they knew, that they both knew how much her and Raven loved them.

 

Those thoughts lead her to the twins and with every breath she took she hoped that they both knew how much they meant to her, that they were her world and the greatest thing she’d ever done with her life. No matter how much her and Clarke had been through having the twins was the single greatest decision they’d made. She knew that from the moment she held them both in her arms, seeing the faces looking up at her, so innocent and pure, she knew how much they needed her, she remembered Clarke being asleep recovering from giving birth as she looked down at both the twins and promised them that she’d always be there for them making sure they were happy and loved and that no matter what they needed or wanted she’d make sure they had it. That day had to be the happiest day of her life, the day her and Clarke’s family had finally been completed. And now here she was thinking about the happiest day of her life on what would probably be the worst of her life. The thought of the twins thinking she’d abandoned them, the thought of Clarke crying her eyes out over her dead body almost broke her, but she knew she couldn’t start crying not now because she needed to keep herself together, if she was crying her eyes out she couldn’t be able to talk to Roan and talk some sense into him. As she thought about her last conversation with her wife hearing the sound of Clarke’s voice, she thought about every emotion the beautiful blonde had ever made her feel, from anger to rage to love to happiness she didn’t even know she could feel, she was pulled out of her thoughts when Roan’s voice filled the room, taking as a deep a breath as she could manage she pushed herself up the best she could with her tied hands, looking at him her vision slightly blurry;

 

“I want you to know I’m sorry…. for all of this, that you have be a sacrifice all to make a point to my sister….” As she looked at Roan knife still in his waistband between his belt and jeans material, she waited until he decided to speak again not sure what he was talking about. No matter what he was talking about, she could sense the change in his demeanour again. “I think it’s only right that you know the truth before I do what I have to….this whole thing has been her, well from Octavia overhearing her talking onwards anyway…see she told me that you slept with her, and that’s when the madness began, she used me told me that I had to do what was best for Clarke….see she always knew that I was in love with Clarke….but I swear to you, I didn’t have a say in any of this, she lied to me you see….she knew I wanted nothing more than to be with Clarke and she used that, I didn’t see what she was doing, I didn’t think that she’d ever do that to me, no matter what happened it was always me and her against the world…..or so I thought…” Lexa flinched slightly when Roan’s demeanour again changed “She convinced me that Clarke liked me back, that if I was there for her I’d earn her love, that in time she’d want me the way I wanted her, and no matter how much I tried it didn’t work, but Nia kept telling me it was for the best…that you were no good for her because you cheated…” Everything inside Lexa wanted to shout out at him, but she couldn’t she physically wasn’t able to speak at this moment in time. “And now I know that was all a lie…she lied to me, when I told her that I didn’t want to ruin your family, she told me you and her had sex, that’s the only reason that I started seeing Clarke more and more, I let her push me and mould me into what she wanted, and when I told her you and Clarke were having problems with communicating….well she told me that I had to find a way for Clarke to find out that couldn’t lead back to her…..and low and behold I saw Monroe and Octavia together see I knew that Raven didn’t like them being together so I had a talk with Monroe, and it was sooooooo easy to convince her to help us make sure Octavia heard what Nia said….” He looked at Lexa suddenly he moved himself forward “I bet your wondering why Monroe was so easy to convince….well little secret, she hates your sister with a passion like she wants her dead, not because she wants Octavia but because she can’t have Octavia….apparently Octavia shut her down pretty harshly and Raven told her a few things that she didn’t like the sound of……ANYWAY….Monroe agreed to get Octavia to Nia’s…actually our parents restaurant…but like I was saying, Monroe got Octavia there and the rest…well the rest you know…except the part where I stalked you and called CPS on you….”

 

The venom instantly rose inside Lexa and she leant forward ready to headbutt Roan, before she pulled back she stopped herself leaning back again. Forcing herself not to do anything that could make Roan kill her instantly, she was still holding out hope that Maya had called the police and that they were on their way to help her. She watched as he laughed and smirked before continuing;

 

“See I’ve been following you since that night you pushed me and threatened me and told me never to touch your wife again…as soon as that happened I called my sister, see I couldn’t understand why Clarke would take you back after you cheated so I called Nia, I asked her what to do because she always knew what I had to do….she always knew how to fix the situation no matter what it was….she told me that I had to hang back and let Clarke realise that she’d made a mistake…she convinced me to hang back…..BUT she told me to watch you, to see how you and Clarke were together so I did…not when you were in the house I couldn’t get close enough without someone seeing me…BUT I watched you I the garden, until Olivia saw me and I had to stop that, then it was just you whenever you’d go out by yourself or with the twins…I wanted to know what you were planning…and then I saw you at the movies with Clarke, all happy and loved up like nothing had happened and I watched as you and her kissed and hugged taking pictures with each other like there wasn’t anything in the world worrying you both….and then I knew that she’d forgiven you, that no matter how much I’d try and sabotage you, she just kept on trusting you no matter what…I couldn’t push too much because I didn’t want to hurt her but I made sure that there were loads of reminders of Nia all around, but Clarke didn’t see it…she just trusted you blindly…and seeing you both at the movies was the last straw…after I told Nia of course…she went crazy, I’ve not seen her that angry in a long time and then boom it hit me, I’d been thinking about CPS for a long time I mean I knew you and your idiot twin sister had history with them so I decided that was one of the last things I could do. And when Nia got that upset at me I decided it was time to finally go with my CPS idea…so I made the phone call anonymously, you’ve gotta tell me how you managed to convince that woman the case was false…because I’ll tell ya…” Roan paused for a second leaning back and laughing loudly as he finished “I was pretty damn convincing, I mean I laid it on thick Lexa….made out you don’t care for them properly…I guess you’re just more convincing in person…but anyways, when Nia heard that your children weren’t being taken WOOOOOOOO she went CRA…..ZZZZZZYYYYYY…So I told her that whatever she wanted I’d make it happen….now granted she didn’t know what I planned not until minutes ago…”

 

Roan was about to continue when a vibrating sound filled room, he looked at Lexa raising his eyebrows knowing that sound wasn’t coming from his phone. Leaning a little closer to her, he smirked before reaching his hand forward and removing the phone from her pocket. The same phone she’d tried to reach numerous times unsuccessfully. She wriggled and tried her best to stop him grabbing the phone again to no success, her actions only making the mad man smirk even more. As he held the phone in his hand he let out a loud ‘tut’ as he noticed the name ‘My One’ on the screen, the smirk falling from his face as he looked at the name and the picture that accompanied the contact, knowing it was Clarke calling the phone. “Maybe she thinks she can save you….see no doubt that idiot Mia, Mona,…Maya or whatever the hell her name is has called your sister and most likely the police as well…but believe me I’ve been studying this place and no matter how much the camera’s see me…” Roan moved closer to Lexa so close she could tell what he’d had for lunch. Her eyes closed and she stopped herself breathing in the smell of his rotten breath as he continued speaking “I’ve been pretty much stalking you for the last two months, and not just when your at Clarke’s house or your apartment but here as well….and I know every single way possible to get out of this place…see that was the plan, it didn’t matter that I got caught on camera it mattered that Nia lied…and really this is lose, lose for you because no matter what way this went whether you’d have mentioned Nia or not…I was going to kill you….it was because of Clarke but now it’s because of Nia, so I can hurt her just like she did me…she shouldn’t have lied…..I wonder…” He contemplated removing the knife from its place on his waist and tapping it on Lexa’s open shoulder wound “I wonder if that will bring Clarke some comfort….and your children…. especially lovely little Olivia…she’s such a little Mama’s girl always whining and moaning for her Mama, giving me grief and speaking rudely like the little cunt she is….” Roan was stopped from speaking when Lexa’s head flew forward connecting with his with a hard thud, sending him flying backwards slightly, his nose beginning to gush blood. Lexa didn’t care what he was going to do to her anymore, she knew he was planning on killing her and she’d given up hope of the police coming, even if they were coming there was no way she was going to let this mad man talk about her children like that. “You going to regret that” He coldly responded his free hand reaching forward and grabbing hold of Lexa’s chin lifting her until she was sitting up completely her feet landing on the ground.

 

“Fuck you”

 

“I’m sorry…. what was that?”

 

“I said Fuck you…” Lexa responded swallowing as much saliva as she could, making it a little easier for her to speak after the beating she’d taken. “I’m not scared of you…I’m not scared of dying, because I know Raven will be there for them….as much as I don’t want to leave them, you’re a psychopath…your gonna kill me and then you’ll be gone forever, your sister will be free to love whoever she wants….and Clarke….no matter how long it takes her she’ll move on, she’ll love again….but no matter what she will NEVER LOVE YOU…no matter how hard you try you’ll never be me…”

 

“Be you…. why would I want to be you…pretty soon you’ll be dead”

 

“And for revenge on your sister…you have no idea how entertaining it is to know that everything you did was for nothing, that your sister used you like the bitch you are…You can take me away from the world but it won’t change your life or make it any better than the pathetic mess it is…nor will it won’t change the fact that you’re a psychopath…” Lexa knew she’d regret her words as soon as Roan let out a single laugh, she watched in almost slow motion as his fist pulled back and flew through the air until it connected with her chin sending her flying forward onto the floor, her face crashed against the hard surface of the floor, sending her teeth firmly into her cheek, she instantly felt her jaw shake and her teeth tear into the skin on the inside of her cheeks. She took in a sharp breath as her mouth filled with what she knew was blood, at the same time she felt Roan grab her legs and roughly throw them onto the floor. Rolling onto her back she leant to her right slightly spitting out the blood that had pooled in her mouth, once she’d finished she leant her head against the floor closing her eyes. She was almost ready to accept her fate when she heard a voice, she was sure she was hearing things until she heard it again, it was someone telling people to move away and then to get back, that was when it hit her where she knew that voice from….it was Bellamy. Silently she thanked Maya knowing that no doubt that Bellamy meant the police which meant Maya had gone against what Roan had told her, no matter how scared the girl had been she’d done the right thing for Lexa. Opening her eyes, she looked up seeing Roan standing over her, instantly remembering and regretting her provoking words at him “WAIT…I’m sorry…”

 

“Oh now you’re sorry huh…. now you’re sorry….NOW….” Roan loudly let out grabbing Lexa by the shirt and lifting her off the ground and forcibly onto her feet, as soon as her feet hit the ground she stumbled, she knew if Roan’s hands weren’t holding her up she’d have been on the floor again instantly. But his hands were there, and they were pushing her backwards until she hit the wall next to the door hard. Her head hit the wall with a thud that was worse than when she headbutted Roan moments before. She knew all she had to do was hold out for a little longer and Bellamy would get her out of here, but now her head was spinning slightly her brain trying to unramble itself as Roan continued speaking “YOUR SORRY NOW YOUR GONNA DIE…..you think I don’t know you can hear the police…I know they’re out there, I know they’re coming for me but guess what…” Roan asked almost whispering now “Their gonna be too late to save you, or stop me….because it’s time Lexa…all those words, that headbutt all your failed attempts to stop me…what? …” He let out a sadistic laugh as he looked deep into her eyes “You thought I didn’t see what you were doing…. trying to trick me….tut tut tut Lexa….I’m sorry but there’s no going back…there never was…” Roan was stopped in his tracks when he heard Clarke’s voice calling out Lexa’s name. Letting her go he watched as she turned slightly trying to look through the window, a tiny piece of her hoping Roan had seen sense and was about to let her go. That tiny piece was quickly shattered into a million pieces as she felt a sharp pain in her right hip, as something cold sliced through her electing a gasp of pure pain to fall from her lips. As she felt the cold sensation disappear she looked down at her top seeing the thing she’d been fearing for that last hour, her blood seeping through her top and turning it red.

 

* * *

 

  **Outside Head Twin Records’ Studio**

Clarke and Raven had jumped out of Raven’s Rover minutes ago, when they’d arrived they saw Bellamy standing with about twenty police officers around him all listening as he told them what to do. As they walked forward the officers spread out around the parking lot, half of them went to various points around the parking lot whilst the others stayed close to the entrance of the Studio, some of the taking cover behind the bonnets of their cars whilst four of them stood in sight of the entrance their guns pulled and aimed at the door awaiting anyone who may potentially exit through the doors. As they reached him, Bellamy hugged them both telling them he was going to get Lexa out of there. When he told them that they had to wait for Roan to contact them Raven began to lose her temper, telling him this wasn’t about money or anything else but Revenge of some sort. He didn’t believe her, not until she pulled out her phone showing him the footage she had downloaded and telling him about the phone call, all this information completely new to Clarke. Raven told Clarke that she knew she wanted to know about everything but now wasn’t the right moment, Clarke agreed and they proceeded to ask Bellamy what the new plan was, to their surprise he told them that they would still have to wait, that storming into the studio was only going to risk Lexa’s life even more after, according to everything that Maya had told him when he spoke to her upon his arrival at the studio. The more he spoke the angrier Clarke got, she began shouting out for Lexa telling them to do their jobs before it was too late, it got so bad that Raven had to pull Clarke back to her car in hopes of calming the blonde, when Clarke remained agitated Raven placed her hands on Clarke’s shoulders looking her in the eyes;

 

“Clarke, you need to calm down and stop shouting”

 

“How the hell can I do that Rae…. this is all because of me…she could be dead by now…”

 

“Hey, she isn’t dead….and none of this is your fault”

 

“How do you know?”

 

“Because this is about Roan and Nia’s obsession, this is about them not being able to move on…”

 

“That’ not what I meant Raven…. How do you know she isn’t dead?”

 

“Because I’d know okay…. like I know when she’d hurt or upset”

 

“You don’t always know Raven….” Clarke dejectedly said her eyes conveying all the upset she was feeling as she looked at her sister in law

 

“She’s not stupid Clarke, she won’t aggravate him, she’ll keep him calm until help gets there…. she knows Maya wouldn’t just go home and not call someone especially the police…. she’ll be trying to talk him down and keep him calm…. just have faith in her Clarke….okay?” Clarke weakly nodded her head at Raven as the brunette pulled her into a hug wrapping her arms around her and gently hugging her. Raven didn’t mention the stabbing pain she was now feeling in her right side, she didn’t mention it because she knew mentioning it would only make it real, and she was hoping with everything inside her that it wasn’t.

 

They were pulled out of their moment when they heard a police officer radio go off ‘Suspect exiting through the rear, officers currently in pursuit assistance requested’ as they both heard the call their heads turned in the direction of the voice. As their heads turned they noticed numerous officers looking around before a few jumped in their cars and headed in the direction of both exits. Looking at the entrance they exchanged a look nodding their heads once before without a word they took off running to the entrance, Bellamy managed to grab hold of Raven stopping her from running into the building. Clarke however kept on running through the reception area and to Raven and Lexa’s personal recording studio, as she reached the door she noticed it was wide open a small beeping sound coming from the panel near the door. Moving forward more she peaked into the room, her whole world came crashing down as her eyes landed on the image of her wife, laying on the floor her top and part of her trouser covered in blood, blood that was pooling around Lexa’s torso underneath her, her body seemingly lifeless…..

 

* * *

  **So, Is Lexa dead???? Well we will have to wait and see but all I will say is Lexa is a SURVIVOR lol….but that doesn’t mean she is out of the woods (Minor Pun intended)….Anyway, what did you all think about this chapter…it wasn’t exactly what I wanted but I enjoyed writing it….As always please feel free to leave a review, all are appreciated all I ask is you please be respectful of the fact I’m a human being with feelings as well** ****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Is Lexa dead???? Well we will have to wait and see but all I will say is Lexa is a SURVIVOR lol….but that doesn’t mean she is out of the woods (Minor Pun intended)….Anyway, what did you all think about this chapter…it wasn’t exactly what I wanted but I enjoyed writing it….As always please feel free to leave a review, all are appreciated all I ask is you please be respectful of the fact I’m a human being with feelings as well


	29. Flashes of Light Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aftermath of Lexa and Roan's encounter.  
> Can Clarke step up and save Lexa?  
> And indeed, Can Lexa be saved?
> 
> WARNING: PLEASE BE ADVISED THAT THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS GRAPHIC DECRIPTIONS THAT SOME MAY FIND DISTRESSING SO PLEASE READ ON WITH EXTREME CAUTION. IF THIS DOES TRIGGER OR BEGIN TO TRIGGER SOMEONE THEN PELASE STOP READING AND MESSAGE ME PERSONALLY AND I WILL GIVE YOU THE CLIFF NOTES FOR THE CHAPTER. SO AGAIN, POTENTIAL TRIGGERS AHEAD….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY Everyone, I hope everyone is doing great and that anyone in America that’s reading this and was affected by the Tropical Storms over there is safe and sound. I have no idea where the storm is as I tend not to watch the news to often as it depresses me and I always seem to turn on when Trump is on the screen and I FUCKING HATE that DOUCHE. So Just to let you all know more Chapter 29 will most likely be three parts due to how much I wanna get in before Chapter 30, I’m writing in a few flashbacks plus the backlash of Lexa getting stabbed and so on. Don’t think I’ll be able to get it into two parts so just a heads up and then most likely Chapter 30 will be either really long or in two parts or perhaps both lol Also I wanna say a MASSIVE THANK YOU to Everyone that commented or gave kudos or bookmarked the last chapter, I appreciate you all taking the time to do so. Anyways I’m gonna shut up and let everyone read on, there are a few notes below but other than that, This chapter is about 7100+ words long and I hope you all enjoy it

** Chapter 29-Flashes of Light Part One **

** Thursday 30th March 2017-16:47 **

Raven stopped fighting against Bellamy as soon as she saw Clarke enter the building, she knew that Clarke would help her sister if she needed it. She was hoping with everything inside her that Lexa would walk out with Clarke in a matter of minutes, wondering what all the fuss was about and why there were police everywhere. She hoped that was what was going to happen, but she knew that hope and reality didn’t always go hand in hand. Those feelings she felt, that pain in her side and that uneasy feeling she only got when Lexa was hurt or in some trouble, they were never wrong not once had they been wrong. As she held her hands up Bellamy let her go, stepping back she looked at him ignoring what he was saying to her, looking past him and into the studio. As he spoke she began to get worried that neither Clarke nor Lexa had emerged or that she’d heard Clarke call out to her or help in any form. That was when she heard it, Clarke say Lexa’s name not call or yell it but call it, and that’s when she saw the Blondes back, she watched as Clarke stepped backwards and into her line of sight her attention completely on the room in front of her. Raven knew from where Clarke was standing that she was in front of her and Lexa’s personal studio, where she knew Lexa was thanks to Maya telling them and Bellamy all the information she could remember. There was something about the way Clarke was staring in whatever was in front of her that worried Raven, and without a second thought she rushed forward again only to be stopped by Bellamy. As she moved backwards from the impact of Bellamy pushing her backwards, she let out a massive groan before she looked at him and apologised, not giving him a chance to ask her what she was apologising for, she pulled her leg back and swung it forward quickly and with force her foot connecting with Bellamy’s inner thigh just missing his balls, as he leant forward from the pain it sent through his body, Raven took the opportunity and rushed past him their shoulders hitting each other slightly as Bellamy tried and this time failed to grab onto Raven. Running inside as fast as she could she ran until she was next to Clarke, turning her head and looking in the direction Clarke was looking, her eyes landing on the image of her sister that had obviously sent Clarke into a small state of shock. Instinctively Raven ran forward and into the room rushing to her sister’s side and dropping quickly onto her knees, as her knees connected with the floor she instantly felt her sister’s blood seeping into her jeans. Her eyes scanned over her twin sister, her eyes scanned every part of her sister taking in all the injuries, from the marks and bruises on her face to the long cut on her right shoulder, then down Lexa’s chest to her stomach, the three tears in Lexa’s shirt covered by blood gave away where the worse injuries on Lexa’s body were. Instantly, she placed her hands over the shirt pressing them down as hard as she could, as she did the amount of pressure.

 

The amount of pressure that Raven applied on Lexa’s stomach sent a rush of pain through Lexa’s body, waking her up from her unconscious state. Her eyes shot open as her whole body convulsed and she went to sit up, only to be stopped by the pressure Raven’s applying. Her stomach pushed against her sister’s hands trying to relieve the pain and pressure. When pushing against Raven’s hands with her stomach didn’t work, she brought her hands up, they shook as she placed them on top of Raven’s trying to remove them from her stomach. Seeing and feeling the actions of her twin sister, Raven grabbed Lexa’s hands with one of hers moving them out of the way looking her sister in the eyes;

 

“Alexa, don’t you dare fight me…. let me help you ok….” Raven could see the fear in Lexa’s eyes she knew what Lexa was thinking “You’re not gonna die ok…. we won’t let it happen…” She noticed Lexa trying to look around, turning her head and looking at the door and through it her eyes landing on Clarke she shouted through to her sister in law “CLARKE…..” When she got no response, she cleared her voice again before speaking loud enough so Clarke could hear her “I know this is shocking and scary but she needs you Clarke…. please I need your help here, I can’t stop the bleeding on my own…. Lexa needs you right now Clarke time to snap out of it…. before it’s too late…” She hated saying the words knowing Lexa was listening to her every word, she watched as Clarke snapped out of her daze shaking her head as she rushed forward, almost as if hearing the final words of Raven’s sentence snapped her into action.

 

Clarke shook her head turning to look at Bellamy she shouted, “GET AN AMBULANCE” Before she turned back running over to her wife stopping next to Raven she looked around trying to find something to put over her wife’s wounds. Seeing a Heda records hoody hanging near the door she rushed over grabbing it, turning back and kneeling next to her wife. She could see Lexa watching her tears glistening in her eyes. “Here place this under your hands….and between her back and the floor, in case the wounds went through her back” Clarke stated looking at Raven, as soon as she handed it to Raven her sister in law did as she was told and placed the hoody underneath her hands and between Lexa’s back and the floor. Looking back to Lexa, Clarke leant down so she was face to face with her wife, placing her right hand gently on her wife’s face now seeing the pain and fear that was buried underneath the tears in Lexa’s eyes “It’s gonna be okay…. just hold on…I know it hurts…” Lexa gave her a weak smile before her body suddenly jolted up, looking at Raven, Clarke quickly realised that Raven had applied more pressure to the wound sending a jolt of pain through Lexa. Leaning down she made Lexa look into her eyes, “Look at me Lex…. just keep looking at me…. talk to me…” When Lexa squirmed in pain letting out a painful grunt she leant a little closer “Come on…you know I love hearing your voice…” The comment made Lexa smile as a tear escaped her left eye, wiping the tear away she leant down kissing Lexa gently and lovingly on the lips, pulling back she looked down at her again she smiled “I know your scared Lex…. just please talk to me…about anything you want….”

 

“That’s a bit dangerous Clarke…. she could bring up anything she wanted….” Raven interjected, she could see the pain and fear on Lexa’s face and she knew her sister was thinking she was gonna die. She also knew that Lexa needed a distraction, something that in this situation was almost impossible to provide. “Like that time, you and Octavia got upset with us because you thought we’re weren’t gonna ask you to prom”

 

Sensing what Raven was trying to do Clarke smiled laughing softly at the comment before responding, keeping her eyes on her wife, “Well neither of you said a word to us about it…and it wasn’t exactly that easy to be Gay or Bisexual when we were in school…we just thought that you both might chicken out…”

 

“Never…The Wood’s Twins never chicken out…. right Lex?”

 

“Right…” Lexa responded looking to her sister, weakly she lifted her left arm up reaching it out to Raven and gently holding onto Raven’s forearm. “We planned a surprise, but you…. you um….” Lexa stopped herself struggling to talk through the pain, swallowing back she continued smiling softly at her sister and her wife “You both got upset, and ruined it”

 

“Well neither of us thought you cared…and we were teenagers so you can’t be mad at us…” Clarke responded smiling down at Lexa, she watched as her wife’s face became very serious. And Lexa took her a sharp breath in, before she released her breath and spoke;

 

“I was never mad at you…. I couldn’t be….” Lexa stopped herself talking when another shot of pain rushed through her body, causing her to grunt in pain as her hips pushed up against her twin sister’s hands. Swallowing back she wet her lips with her tongue before closing her eyes for a second, opening them and continuing “Not back then….I was so in love with you it was almost pathetic…”

 

“Almost?” Raven butted in, looking at Lexa apologetically her eyes pointed to the wound that was covered by her hands, her eyes and body language silently telling her sister she needed to apply more pressure. Lexa softly smiled at her twin sister, softly nodding her head once giving her the ok to go ahead. Raven smiled at Lexa continuing to talk as she continued talking “You were a mess, I remember the weeks after you two had your first kiss….Lexa was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t think about talking to you again…or how her silence would affect her chances..”

 

“But I made up for it” Lexa responded with a massive grin on her face, Clarke smirked at the grin Lexa was giving her, leaning down she gently kissed her on the lips, their lips staying connected for a few seconds before Clarke pulled back, as she sat herself up she noticed the metallic iron taste that was now in her mouth, looking down at her wife she felt the panic rise inside her as she noticed the blood that was now covering Lexa’s lips.

 

“What the hell is that Clarke? …. What does that mean?” Raven asked her face filled with panic and fear, she knew that Lexa’s mouth wasn’t bleeding before.

 

“It means that we need that ambulance now” Clarke let out going to stand up only to be stopped by Lexa’s hand holding onto hers. Moving back close to Lexa she leant over her kissing her gently once more before softly whispering “I just need to know where the ambulance is….I’ll be back within a minute I promise babe…”

 

“Be quick” Lexa softly responded closing her eyes as Clarke leant forward placing a kiss on her forehead before pulling back smiling.

 

“I will….I promise” Looking to Raven she softly spoke “Keep the pressure on….both sides of her stomach, no matter how painful it is for her, okay?” Raven nodded her head at her sister in laws question and without another word Clarke jumped to her feet rushing forward through the studio door running towards Bellamy for an update.

 

Lexa watched Clarke leave the room her eyes falling to her sister, swallowing back the blood in her mouth, instantly regretting the taste that filled her mouth, ignoring that taste she cleared her throat tears brimming in her eyes again “Raven….”

 

“No Lexa….I know what your gonna say and I don’t wanna hear it…”

 

“I forgot we share thoughts sometimes…”

 

“Yeah, we share a lot Lexa, we always have….and we always will, for years to come until we’re both old and talking about our children and the trouble their causing us…”

 

“I know but I need t….” Lexa stopped herself as the pain continued to flow through her body stopping her from talking as she coughed harshly, now Clarke was gone there was nothing stopping her showing her pain, she didn’t have to pretend to be ok for Raven and she knew that, gripping her sister’s hand a little tighter as the cough took over her body, forcing her to turn to the side as her mouth filled with blood, spitting out the blood she looked her sister in the eyes, rolling back onto her back she continued “I need you to promise me…” She added looking Raven dead in the eyes, the same tears that were brimming in those eyes moments ago, now falling freely down her cheeks as she the twin sisters shared a look of fear. “Please…. I need to know that if…”

 

“I promise…...if the worse happens then I’ll look after them…. until my last breath”

 

“Thank you”

 

“You don’t need to thank me, because you’re not going anywhere so I won’t have to keep that promise”

 

“I just…”

 

“I know…you needed to hear it…. remember we’re twins….I can read you like a book…” Raven responded smiling, removing her right hand so she was applying pressure to all the wounds on her sisters stomach, she removed her left hand grabbing a tissue from her pocket she reached up wiping Lexa’s tears from her cheeks “Now stop being an emotional wreck before Clarke comes back in…..”

 

“Rae…I’m scared and I don’t wanna d…”

 

“I promise Lexa…...no matter what happens I’ve got Clarke and the twins…forever….” Raven reaffirmed looking at her sister letting her know she was one hundred percent serious about what she’d just promised her.

 

Lexa didn’t get a chance to respond as Clarke came running into the studio breathless as she jumped over Lexa’s legs and knelt beside her wife again. Taking hold of her hand, she softly spoke “The ambulance is two minutes away okay so just keeping hanging in there”

 

“I’m hanging…”

 

“So be honest…. did you miss me?”

 

“I always miss you” Lexa honestly responded looking at her wife smiling at the bright smile that appeared on Clarke’s face. She looked deep into Clarke’s eyes hoping that looking into them would somehow make all the pain she was feeling disappear, hoping that the heavy feeling in her eyelids would disappear if she looked into those blue eyes for long enough. As she looked deeper she felt her eyes getting heavier and heavier, the more she fought the feeling the heavier they got until she couldn’t stop them anymore, she’d been fighting the feeling for so long she could hold out any longer, not even for two minutes. Finally giving in, she ignored the calls coming from her wife and her sister as her mind was filled with thoughts of Clarke, the twins and her family and the moments spent with them all over the years.

* * *

 

** _FLASHBACK_ **

** _24 th September 2012 (4 Months & 2 Weeks after the twin’s birth)_ **

** _3am in the Morning_ **

_Clarke was pacing back and forth in the living room with Olivia in her arms, she’d spent the last two hours holding Oscar and getting him to sleep, thankfully he’d fallen asleep in her arms almost instantly after she’d picked him up but looking down at that innocent face she didn’t dare move in case he woke up again. So, she’d spent the two hours she was holding him just looking at him, watching every small movement her made wondering how it was possible to love someone so much. In the four months and two weeks the twins had been alive they’d been through so much and she couldn’t help but blame herself, if she hadn’t gone into premature labour two months early they would have never been in hospital for as long as they were. Her and Lexa had numerous conversations where her wife told her over and over that it wasn’t her fault, it was something that was unfortunate but that they got through, she’d tell her how the twin’s were fighters just like their Mommy was. Good she loved Lexa, her wife always knew what to say to her to make her feel better within herself. And over those four months the twins were in the hospital Lexa had been a rock for her, not making her go home unless she wanted to and even when she did go home, she’d give Clarke updates every ten minutes if she needed. She’d bring her food and a change of clothes on those rough days when Clarke didn’t want to leave the twins for one second. No matter what Clarke needed Lexa was there and willing to give it to her, and spending that time in the hospital had only made them stronger as a couple._

_She’d spent so long in that hospital that when the doctors told her and Lexa they could take the twin’s home it didn’t feel real or like she was ready. She got so upset at the thought of something happening when they got home that she fought the doctors hard, so hard that Lexa had to remove her from the room for a moment to calm her down. Once she had her and Clarke had a talk and she told Lexa all about her worries, Lexa as usual eased her mind and told her that no matter what happened they’d face it together, she told her that if the twins weren’t ready to leave then the doctors wouldn’t be discharging them, after a small discussion where Lexa eased all her worries Clarke was finally calm. Taking Clarke back to the doctors Clarke apologised to the doctors who assured her that it was fine, they proceeded to walk the two women through all the paperwork they needed to sign. And then they were free to talk their babies home, and within forty minutes Lexa had pulled into the driveway and they were finally bringing their twins home, to their family home…finally._

_The two weeks since they’d taken the twins home had flown by, both Olivia and Oscar had been up every single night since they got home, they’d stay awake through the night most nights then sleep during the day, it was something that Clarke and Lexa were trying to get them out of but stopping a baby from sleeping was impossible mainly due to the fact that they were babies and if they weren’t happy they’d cry. And neither Clarke or Lexa wanted to put the twins through that. So they both decided that they’d take it in turns getting up at night. But unknown to Lexa the last three nights Clarke had been up with the twins taking them downstairs in their bassinettes, closing her and Lexa’s bedroom door and turning off the baby monitors so Lexa wouldn’t hear the cries coming from their babies. This was her chance to thank Lexa for being so strong for her over the last few months, even if it was only in the form of sleep. But tonight seemed different, tonight Olivia had been crying almost nonstop, the only time she’d stopped was when Clarke mentioned Lexa or Mama as she called her when talking to the twins’ as soon as she said Mama, Olivia’s cries settled slightly and she closed her eyes almost as if just that name called her completely. Her daughter had stayed asleep for over two hours until the exact moment Clarke placed her brother next to her, then her eyes shoot open and she began crying again. Lifting Olivia out of the bassinette Clarke cradled her daughter bouncing her gently in her arms and beginning to walk around the room softly whispering to her daughter, even the mention of her Mama wasn’t working as the little girl cried out, Clarke had checked everything she could think of, Olivia wasn’t due a feed for another hour or two, her nappy was clean and she wasn’t overheating one bit. She was almost at a loss for what to do when she heard the stairs creak and turned around to see Lexa coming down the stairs, wiping her eyes of sleep as she walked over to her wife, once she was close enough she kissed Clarke on the cheek softly asking;_

_“Why didn’t you wake me up?”_

_“I wanted to let you get some sleep”_

_“I sleep when you sleep that’s only fair….what’s wrong with Olivia?”_

_“I don’t know, she’s not due a feed, her nappy is clean, she’s not overheating I don’t know what’s wrong Lexa?” Clarke let out the worry was clear in her voice for Lexa to hear._

_“Hey calm down I’m sure it’s nothing major…. here let me try” Lexa finished reaching down and lifting their daughter from Clarke’s arms. As soon as she placed Olivia in her arms the crying stopped, the instant cease in crying shock both Clarke and Lexa, they were expecting Olivia to calm down but for the crying to stop completely was a definite shock. Looking at Clarke she amusingly asked, “What did I do?”_

_“Nothing you just held her…..Maybe she’s just Mama’s princess….” Lexa didn’t have a chance to respond as Olivia let out a small laugh causing both women to look at each other in shock “Did she just laugh?” Clarke instantly asked looking at her wife_

_“I think so yeah…. say it again…”_

_“Say what? …. Mama’s princess” They were both shocked again when Olivia let out a small laugh, her small face filing with instant happiness at the words her Mommy had spoken. Clarke looked at her wife in amusement, suddenly, her tiredness and all the wear and tear of staying up all night and then all day instantly disappearing as she looked down at her smiling daughter. “I’ve never heard her laugh before”_

_“Me neither…I didn’t even know babies could laugh at four months…”_

_“It all depends on the baby I suppose…. It’s not unheard of I suppose…. she’s just advanced I suppose…”_

_“She takes after her Mommy then…. don’t you?” Lexa softly cooed looking down at her daughter as Olivia slowly began to wriggle in her arms, smiling softly at Clarke, Lexa began to slowly walk around the living room knowing the movement would sooth her daughter slightly “You are so beautiful, and perfect, your eyes, your ears, your little face…” Olivia looked intently up at her Mama her attention completely on her Mama as her small features reacting softly but completely to everything her Mama said and did. “Your little hands, and your little feet…. your little laugh when Mommy says Princess…” Right on cue Olivia let out a small laugh looking up at her Mama and wriggling in happiness and excitement as she continued to look up at her Mama. “I guess we know your nickname, but I’m not gonna say it again because me and Mommy need some sleep…. yes, we do…and as beautiful and perfect as you are, me and Mommy can’t stay awake all night, because soon we’ll go crazy and you don’t want us crazy, do you?” Olivia moved in her Mama’s arms her small arms raising in the air and then falling back down, almost as if she was trying to argue with her Mama. “I know you don’t want to sleep but you have to….because Mama is asking nicely…and I wanna cuddle with Mommy…” Olivia repeated her motion her face contorting at her Mama “I know baby girl, but when you’re older we can cuddle all the time….but right now you need to get some sleep so you can grow up and be big and strong so you can look after me and Mommy…so please go to sleep princess…” Olivia’s face lit up at Lexa’s use of the nickname ‘princess’ smiling down at her daughter she heard a small cry turning seeing Clarke walking over to Oscar and picking him up from his bassinette, looking back down at her daughter she softly spoke “Now your brother is awake….” Walking over to Clarke she looked down at her son, softly speaking she looked between them both and softly continued “Okay…both of you need to sleep, so Mama is gonna sing to you both, now this is a one off so no getting ideas okay….” She reinforced looking down at Olivia then looking to Oscar, neither of the twins made a noise instead they both looked at their Mama, Oscar’s attention was only on his Mama for about thirty seconds before her looked back up at his Mommy a small smile like expression covering his face. Lexa noticed as a smile spread across Clarke’s face at the fact their son’s attention was completely on her. Smiling herself Lexa softly began singing carefully moving Olivia back and forth in a swinging motion as she sang:_

**_ -Boyce Avenue Cover: What Makes You Beautiful- _ **

_You're insecure,_

_Don't know what for,_

_You're turning heads when you walk through the door,_

_Don't need make-up,_

_To cover up,_

_Being the way that you are is enough,_

_[Bridge]_

_Everyone else in the room can see it,_

_Everyone else but you,_

_[Chorus]_

_Baby you light up my world like nobody else,_

_The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed,_

_But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell,_

_You don't know, Oh, oh,_

_You don't know you're beautiful,_

_That's what makes you beautiful_

_So girl come on, You got it wrong._

_To prove I'm right, I put it in a song._

_I don't know why, You're being shy,_

_And turn away when I look in your eyes,_

_Everyone else in the room can see it,_

**_-Lexa smiles brightly as she sees Olivia’s eyes closing-_ **

_Everyone else but you,_

**_-Clarke and Lexa exchange a smile as they both walk slowly around the room as Lexa continues to sing-_ **

_Baby you light up my world like nobody else,_

_The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed,_

_But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell,_

_You don't know, Oh oh,_

_You don't know you're beautiful,_

**_-Lexa smiles brightly at Clarke as she continues looking down at their son-_ **

_That's what makes you beautiful_

_That's what makes you beautiful_

_Baby you light up my world like nobody else,_

_The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed,_

_But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell,_

_You don't know, Oh oh,_

_You don't know you're beautiful,_

_That’s what makes you beautiful x3_

_Baby you light up my world like nobody else,_

_The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed,_

_But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell,_

_You don't know, Oh oh,_

_You don't know you're beautiful (Oh),_

**_-Lexa looks at Clarke, who looks back at her, their eyes meeting as Lexa sings the words directly to Clarke-_ **

_If only you saw what I can see,_

_You'll understand why I want you so desperately_

_Right now, I'm looking at you and I can't believe,_

_You don't know, Oh oh,_

_You don't know you're beautiful, Oh oh,_

_You don't know you're beautiful, Oh oh,_

_And That's what makes you beautiful_

_Lexa softly stopped herself singing looking down at the sleeping form of her daughter smiling brightly at how peaceful and happy Olivia looked. Looking over at Clarke she noticed Oscar was sleeping as well, nodding her head towards the stairs Clarke nodded in agreement, both silently agreeing to take the twins upstairs to their cots. Lexa slowly led the way up the stairs taking her time to climb the stairs, once she reached the top of the stairs she quietly and carefully walked into her and Clarke’s bedroom where the twin’s cots were set up for the next month at least. Walking to the light blue covered cot she lowered her daughter carefully into the cot, making sure not to disturb her from her sleep, once Olivia was safely in her cot, Lexa covered her daughter’s legs and waist with her light blue blanket just as Clarke slowly walked into their bedroom. Walking over to her Clarke stopped at the cot right next to Olivia’s the cot identical to Olivia’s except for the dark blue that covered it, smiling at Lexa she softly lowered her so into the cot just like Lexa she was careful not to wake up Oscar as she laid him down and covered his legs and waist with his dark blue blanket. She continued to look down at their son for a few minutes before she looked up seeing Lexa’s eyes were on her completely. Smiling at her wife she looked down at Olivia seeing their daughter was fast asleep something that still surprised her, looking up at Lexa she motioned towards the bed seeing the smile on Lexa’s face she walked over to the bed watching her wife walk over to the door closing it and turning on the night lamp turning it to the lowest brightness she could._

_Once the light was on Lexa walked over to the bed walking around to her side of the bed she climbed seeing Clarke had laid herself down on the other side of the bed leaving space between them, Lexa thought about it for a moment over the last few weeks they’d been home her and Clarke had barely touched other than kissing during the day. Deciding she didn’t want it to go on any longer she shuffled across the bed until she was behind Clarke, wrapping her left arm around her wife’s waist. The action cause Clarke to turn slightly to face her allowing Lexa to slide her right arm under Clarke’s head, Lexa smiled down at the Blonde as she lifted her head and made herself more comfortable on the brunette’s right bicep. Positioning herself so she could clearly see Lexa’s face Clarke smiled brightly at her wife. Lexa smiled down at Clarke the kind of smile that Clarke could see was one hundred percent genuine. Leaning into the blonde Lexa connected their lips softly pulling back and smiling at her wife, she leant her head back against the headboard behind her looking intently at Clarke, taking in every single perfect thing about her wife, as she took in a small breath and softly spoke;_

_“It feels like way too long since we cuddled”_

_“It has been, I’m sorry…”_

_“Why are you sorry Clarke? …you have nothing to be sorry about”_

_“Since we got the twins home, I’ve been up every night with the twins and I didn’t wake you once…I didn’t want to wake you up, you’ve been so great these last four months and everything is just building up and I didn’t want to add more to your plate so I just….”_

_“Bottled it up…Clarke we talked about this…” Using her left hand Lexa moved it to gently move a few stray strands of hair out of Clarke’s face, gently caressing Clarke’s right cheek as she continued “I can’t be there for you and help you if you won’t let me in…and….I really wanna be there for you”_

_“I know you do…and I want to let you in, I really do it’s just…”_

_“Hard?”_

_“Yeah…I am trying Lex…I really am…”_

_“I know you are baby….just keep talking to me or even Octavia, if you can’t talk to me then talk to her…please I just don’t want you to feel like you have nobody to talk to”_

_“I don’t wanna burden anyone else”_

_“You wouldn’t be burdening anyone Clarke…why not try talking to your Mom and Dad maybe that would be easier”_

_“I can’t talk to my mom and dad, they’ve got so much going on and they are so happy about the twins coming home, and then there’s Aden and Charlotte’s school stuff, They are finally getting some time to be them….they’re in a good place I don’t wanna be the one to ruin that”_

_“You wouldn’t be ruining it Clarke”_

_“Maybe…”_

_“Okay, I’m not gonna push you…just promise you’ll talk to me or Octavia if you’re feeling overwhelmed or emotional?” Seeing the hesitation on Clarke’s face Lexa took a small breath kissing Clarke on the cheek then the lips before asking “What is it?”_

_“Octavia and Raven have got so much going on, they just moved into their new apartment, and I know Raven’s thinking about marriage and maybe proposing, I just don’t want that to be ruined by me. Octavia is so happy I’ve never seen her this happy, she has her own things to worry about, and I don’t want to ruin that.”_

_“Clarke…Listen to me…” Lexa shuffled herself a little closer to Clarke, so they were face to face their chests pressed against each other’s as she looked into Clarke’s eyes Lexa continued “I know your worried about burdening everyone with your problems, but you won’t be burdening them Clarke, we all want to help…I want to help you…and I know something is wrong Clarke, and hiding it isn’t going to help you”_

_Clarke looked at Lexa taking in everything her wife had just said to her, leaning forward she connected their lips together for a second before she pulled back looking at Lexa. Taking a breath in she looked into Lexa’s eyes before she spoke “I just feel like…I don’t know Lexa…. My brain is all over the place, and I can’t seem to unjumble it no matter what I try nothing works…and I’ve been so wrapped up in everything I’ve been feeling that I didn’t even get you a birthday present…”_

_“This is what this is about?”_

_“What kind of wife doesn’t remember her wife’s birthday…it was horrible, I didn’t even remember until that morning when Raven called”_

_“Clarke, all those things they don’t matter to me…” When Clarke went to protest Lexa pulled her closer before continuing “I don’t care about birthdays or even if you don’t remember them…”_

_“You say that Lexa but….”_

_“No buts….you gave me something way more precious and meaningful than anything that you could buy me, you gave me those two…” Lexa smiled motioning towards the two cots at the bottom of their bed. “I didn’t think it was possible to love someone as much as I love you but then you gave me those two miracles, and I realised that I could love someone just as much as you but in a completely different way. My birthday was great, I got to spend it with you and the twins, I got to spend the whole day with you and them without worrying about any drama I just got to spend every single second with my three favourite people”_

_“You say that but…”_

_“I say it because its true, I didn’t care about anything but you three, I didn’t care about presents or anything else because I had you and them”_

_“You say its ok Lexa but that still doesn’t change that I forgot…”_

_“No but what you did after you realised does, you made me feel like I was the most important person in the world. You cooked for me, you made sure that I relaxed and didn’t have to rush around or do anything other than relax. You showed me how much you loved me, even though we both know your going through something more than just worries…”_

_“I know something's wrong with me but I’m scared Lex…” Clarke finally admitted tears escaping her eyes and rushing down her cheeks, some of those tears spilling onto Lexa’s left hand which was still resting on her cheek. “What if something is really badly wrong with me, like unfixable…”_

_“Nothing is unfixable Clarke…. not when it comes to me and you…But you have to see someone, for me and for the twins…” Lexa responded wiping away the tears from both Clarke’s cheeks with her left hand. “We can get through anything together, we just need to know what we have to get through, I know that it’s scary not knowing what’s going on in your own head, and I can’t even imagine how scary it is but I promise you that we can get through this…. together…”_

_“We can?”_

_“Of course, we can…this is me and you, we can take on the world and win if we want…” Seeing the small smile on Clarke’s face Lexa leant forward pecking Clarke on the lips before continuing “I’ll make you a deal…if you promise to talk to me when you’re feeling low, and to tell the doctor how you’ve been feeling…then I go down on you right here and right now…”_

_Clarke let out a small giggle at her wife’s words leaning forward, resting her head softly on her wife’s shoulder before lifting her head back up and kissing Lexa gently “You don’t have to do that I’ll tell you and the doctor…trust me it’s a mess down there, I’m a mess you don’t want that…”_

_“Hey, you’re not a mess Clarke…your perfect, you might not believe me but you are…don’t put yourself down like that ok?”_

_“You say that but I can’t help it … I don’t know why I feel like this Lex…” Seeing the love and acceptance in Lexa’s face was all Clarke needed to finally let out all the emotions she’d been bottling up inside for the last four months. As she finally let go, the tears flowed freely and quickly as she began to cry uncontrollably. Lexa instantly wrapped her arms fully around her pulling Clarke close to her and holding onto her tightly. Letting her wife release all her emotions as she softly whispered into Clarke’s ear;_

_“It’s gonna be ok…. we’re gonna get through this”_

_Clarke wrapped her arms around Lexa’s waist holding onto her tight as she felt a release of pressure that she’d let build up for months on end. And once she started crying she couldn’t stop herself, she felt safe in Lexa’s arms not worrying about her wife judging her for anything she was feeling. Not making her think she was in the wrong or that she needed to hide how she was feeling but making her feel wanted and cared for. She should have known this was how Lexa would have reacted but still she was scared, she hadn’t felt anything like this before and now she was feeling so many different emotions that she didn’t know how to process them. And she was scared because she didn’t know how to deal with these emotions or when they would go away, and everytime she thought about it she thought about the possibility that the wouldn’t go away at all, something that scared her more than the emotions themselves._

* * *

 

** Boston University Hospital (Formerly Boston Medical Centre) **

** Thursday 30th March 2017-17:02 **

Clarke rushed into the Emergency department of the hospital looking around frantically trying to find someone to help her. Rushing towards the front desk she held her shaking hands over the counter not placing them down due to the small amount of Lexa’s blood that was on her hands. She stood at the desk asking where Lexa Woods had been taken to, the nurse at the desk told her that she had no record of anyone with that name. Clarke went into a spin it was like her mind was spinning out of control and she couldn’t control it. Looking around the tears formed in her eyes as she stood still not knowing what to do. This hospital had been a place she used to like coming to, not because of the death or misery that filled it but because she got to see her Mom in all her doctoring glory, seeing her mom saving people’s lives like it was the easiest thing in the world to do, it always made her appreciate how lucky she was to have her Mom and how amazing her Mom was, day in and day out she’d save people’s lives and then come on like nothing bad at happened. She remembered days when her Mom would come home and all she’d do is hug her and hold onto her like if she let go she’d disappear. Now she was older she realised that those days must have been the bad days, but how her Mom never let on she was upset or that she’d had a hard day Clarke didn’t know. How her Mom protected her from all the bad things she’d seen over the years, she had no idea, and how she was going to protect the twins from this, she didn’t know. So many things had changed over the years, the hospitals name, the people that worked there, the people that owned it, but her Mom was still there helping people day in and day out without fail. In so many ways, her mom was the hospitals Lexa, one without the other didn’t seem right.

 

The whole journey to the hospital driving in Raven’s car all she could think about was losing Lexa. She knew it wasn’t good when the paramedics had told Raven she couldn’t remove her hands from Lexa’s stomach. She knew it was really bad that they couldn’t get Lexa to wake up no matter what they tried. She knew these were signs that things were bad. But the pain she felt thinking about those things was nothing compared to the pain she felt at the thought of losing Lexa completely, just the thought itself almost broke her. She pushed that thought out of her mind completely not wanting to think about what it’d be like to tell the twins their Mama wasn’t coming back home, their reactions and their small faces contorting into a sad mixture of pain and upset. Looking around the emergency department she tried to work out where she should go, that was until her Mom’s voice broke her out of every single thought she was having. As soon as she looked at her Mom the emotions took over her, the fear of losing Lexa overpowering her ability to control herself. Abby walked forward wrapping her arms around Clarke instantly worried about her daughter as she noticed the blood on her hands:

 

“Clarke what’s wrong? Where did all this blood come from?”

 

Clarke took in numerous deep breaths pulling herself from her Mother’s arms she spoke “It’s not mine its Lexa’s….. Roan took her hostage and then he stabbed her and no matter what I tried I couldn’t stop the bleeding then she fell unconscious they couldn’t wake her and then I was here and now I don’t know what to do…”

 

“Clarke breath ok, I’ll find out what’s going on?” Before Abby had a chance to move an inch a team of nurses rushed past her shouting to her as they went past her

 

“DR GRIFFIN, INCOMING ABDONMINAL TRAUMA, SUSPECTED STAB WOUNDS”

 

Abby rushed off knowing that the incoming patient was Lexa, she’d knew from what Clarke had said and how Clarke was acting whatever had happened was serious and that would mean that she needed to be completely focused and on point. Turning and smiling at her daughter she softly spoke “I’ll look after her Clarke” seeing Clarke nod once in her direction Abby ran as fast as she could towards the ambulance bay. As she reached the outside the ambulance pulled up, rushing to the door she placed her hand on the handle of the back door of the ambulance taking a second before she opened the door, trying to prepare her mind for what she was about to see.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhhhhh Please don’t hate me lol In my defence I did warn you all that this chapter would be split into three parts haha Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed it, what did you think? I apologise for the mistakes made but I didn’t have anytime to proof read this chapter, just finished and uploaded it straight away hopefully there weren’t too many mistakes. Next chapter will have a lot more about Lexa and her condition along with more Abby and the reactions of everyone finding out about Lexa being stabbed. Along with a whole bunch of other stuff and perhaps a flashback or two


	30. Flashes of Light Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continued on from Part One of Chapter 29.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO Everyone, my apologies for the lack of updates and responses to Comments over the last few weeks. About two weeks ago I broke my jaw in a boxing accident and had to have surgery to resolve the issue and make it possible for me to eat that unfortunately involved me staying in the hospital for a week and once I got home writing wasn't really on my list of things to do mainly because I was out of it for a while as I adjusted to the medication the doctors placed it on. Anyways that's enough from me lol This chapter is shorter than my normal chapters but I just wanted to get some more CLEXA backstory in along with Abby in doctor mode and the bit at the end, So even though it is shorter I hope that you all enjoy it just as much and also that it makes sense I rushed writing it in about two hours so hopefully it isn't bad, Once I finish Part Three I'll edit this Part and tie up anything that doesn't mess together. But anyways I'll stop talking and let you all read :-) Hope you all enjoy it.

** Chapter 29- Flashes of Light Part Two **

Exhaling Abby pulled on the door handle opening the door with force as the Paramedic that had been driving the ambulance appeared next to her opening the other door. Abby looked into the ambulance seeing a clearly emotional Raven with her hands pressed into a clearly unconscious Lexa’s stomach. Not wasting anytime Abby jumped into the back of the ambulance evaluating Lexa visually. She could see that the floor of the ambulance was covered in blood, blood that she could see was coming from the gurney, the blood flowing from Lexa’s back onto the gurney and then onto the floor. Moving in between Raven and Lexa the best she could she slid her hands underneath Ravens the action causing them to exchange a look and letting Raven know that her sister was now in the best hands. Once her hands were exactly where Raven’s where Abby gave the brunette a small nod and smile letting her know it was ok to remove her hands. Removing her hands Raven instantly jumped out of the ambulance blindly staring at the image of Abby and the paramedics tending to her lifeless looking twin sister. Tears brimmed in her eyes as Abby’s voice filled her ears:

 

“Right let’s get her inside NOW”

 

The paramedics did as they were told as nurses waited beside Raven waiting for Abby to remove Lexa from the back of the rig. Unlocking the wheels of the gurney the paramedics pushed the gurney out of the ambulance one of them jumping out and lifting the bottom of the gurney until the legs extended and hit the ground, as soon as all legs were extended and firmly on the ground all the medical staff took off sprinting each holding onto the side of gurney guiding it through the ER and into the Resuscitation room, as they entered resus Abby stayed with Lexa as the two paramedics pushed the gurney to bay 2 of the room, as the three pushed the gurney the nurses released their holds on the side of the gurney all of them rushing off to grab hold of whatever equipment they were going to need, pain relief, sutures, IV drips and bandage packs to stem bleeding. All four of the nurses quickly grabbed the equipment rushing back to the gurney to help Abby. As they transferred Lexa from the gurney to a trolley they all looked to Abby, looking at them her brain rushing overtime as she thought about her grandchildren and how they’d react if they lost their Mama, she thought about Clarke and how it would break her daughter losing Lexa like this, or in fact losing Lexa in any way shape or form. Thinking about the three of them crying almost broke her heart. Hearing one of the nurses call her, Abby took a deep breath in closing her eyes for a second before she exhaling as her eyes shot open and the doctor in her took over.

 

“I need gauges and sutures right now….and find out her blood type and cross match it…Trisha call up to Dr Mitchell and tell him we need him upstairs in theatre one in ten minutes….the reset of you pack these wounds as best as we can…and check her body for any other injuries we need to be aware of….I want her packed so we can move in the next three minutes…she can’t handle any longer….I’m gonna operate on her to stem the bleed it looks like she has internal damage which will be why we can’t stop the bleed….I’ll need two of you to scrub in with me…and let’s get a heart monitor on her…” The nurses listened intently to Abby, at the same time all of them springing into action doing as they were told, all of them working together like a well-oiled machine, working together to make sure that Abby’s orders were strictly followed. As the nurses worked, Trisha ran behind Abby running over to the phone to call Dr Mitchell as she did. Removing her hands from Lexa’s stomach as a nurse came in beside her and took over applying pressure, Abby moved up Lexa’s body to her head brushing her hair gently back she placed a loving kiss on the forehead of the woman that over the last nearly ten years had become her family, as one of the nurses placed the heart monitor on Lexa another placed the IV Line into Lexa’s right arm, Abby softly whispered to the brunette. “It’s gonna be okay Lexa…I’ve got you know…all you have to do is keep fighting for me…and for Clarke and the twins…I’ll do the rest…” Standing herself up she began working with the nurses moving her attention back to the wounds on Lexa’s stomach. Her eyes landed on their mark as the nurses removed the blood covered packing that Raven and then Abby had been holding down, the same packing Abby had let go of moments ago. As the packing was removed, one of the nurses used a suction tool to remove the blood as best she could, it was then that Abby saw the extent of the wounds to Lexa’s stomach, she had three wounds all of them the same length and width, she knew that meant they all came from the same weapon. Looking at the wounds the best she could with the blood that continued to pump out of the wounds, covering Lexa’s stomach again before the nurses had time to wipe it away, Abby was able to notice that the wounds were about three inches in length and less than half an inch in width, she could also tell from the amount of blood that Lexa was losing that there was most likely some internal damage internally, she wasn’t sure how bad the damage would be but she knew she didn’t have that much time. She needed to get Lexa into the Operating Theatre now. Grabbing a handful of packs, she placed them over Lexa’s wounds pressing down on the firmly she gently grabbed one of the nurse’s hands, knowing what Abby was thinking Trisha placed her hands over Abby’s allowing the Doctor to remove her hands and move them to the edge of the trolley, Lexa’s blood transferring from her hands to the sheet underneath her hands.

 

“Let’s get her to theatre NOW….”

 

The nurses jumped into action removing anything that needed to be taken with them to the theatre, one of the nurses placed the heart monitor on the end of the bed near Lexa’s feet. Whilst the other removed the IV bag from stand it was hooked on and placed it on the bed near Lexa’s right arm. Raising the sides of the trolley Abby looked at all the nurses all of them giving them a nod, without a further word they all began moving pushing the trolley as fast as they could heading towards the elevator. Every step she took Abby thought about Lexa, Clarke and the twins and the family they had, and the more she thought about the four of them the more determined she became not to let Lexa give up, and to make sure that she did everything in her power to save her daughter in law.

 

* * *

 

**_ Flashback _ **

**_ Clarke and Lexa’s (CONFIRM DATE 2015?) twins are about eight months old  _ **

_Lexa was in the kitchen with the twins it was 9am and Raven and Octavia were due to come over. She’d called Octavia and asked the younger brunette if she could take Clarke out for the day to treat the blonde to a well earned break. She hadn’t told Clarke until that morning when they’d woken up at 5am, the Blonde was beyond happy and excited at her wife’s kind gesture. The twins woke up not long after them and they two women decided that laying in bed with the twins would be a better option at that moment in time than going downstairs. To their surprise the twins had ended up going back to sleep in their arms. Neither woman moved for the next two hours as the twins slept, instead they spoke for those two hours talking about anything and everything they thought about. At 7am the twins woke up again and Lexa and Clarke took it turns to shower and get dressed whilst the other looked after the twins. Neither took too long in the shower in case the twins got niggly with the other. Within forty five minutes both women had showered and were finishing getting dressed with the twins laying in their cots letting out small baby noises as Lexa continued talking to them both whilst getting dressed. The fact that Lexa was talking to the twins and they were both gurgling or making some noise in response made Clarke laugh, it was almost like the three of them were having an actual conversation. Clarke had gone downstairs first and began making breakfast for her and Lexa, once she was done she_ w _alked back upstairs telling Lexa breakfast was ready the two women then picking up a twin each and carrying them downstairs into the kitchen. They laid the twins down on their changing mats whilst Clarke went to make them both bottles while Lexa entertained them both making funny faces making them both let out giggles. Once Clarke had made up the bottles she returned to the living room, walking up slowly behind Lexa handing one of the bottles to Lexa and pointing her head towards Oscar signalling the bottle was for him. Smiling Lexa lifted her son from the mat as Clarke lifted Olivia from hers both beginning to feed their respective twins their bottle. Both gently bouncing the twins in their arms as they knew they liked. Within ten minutes both of the twins had finished their milk and had just been burped as Clarke and Lexa walked into the kitchen placing them both in their high chairs Clarke went about making her and Lexa a coffee each before carrying the coffees over to the waiting plates of pancakes at the table Lexa now sat, as she sat down Clarke smiled as she watch Lexa talk to the twins;_

_“Come on guys give Mama something…half a word even….please…”_

_“It won’t work babe I’m telling you”_

_“They have to start talking soon…” before Lexa could finish her sentence the front door opened and her and Clarke instantly knew it was Octavia and Raven entering the house using their spare key. As the two women walked in and joined them Lexa smirked seeing her sister beeline for the chair next to her grabbing one of her pancakes turning her attention to Octavia as she sat next to Clarke, Lexa asked “Do I really have to babysit her all day?”_

_“Yes you do Alexa, she’s been driving me crazy…in all the good ways of course buuuttttt if you don’t keep her here and away from me then me and Clarke won’t get to go shopping and I realllllyyyyyyy wanna go shopping”_

_“When you put it like that….” Lexa smiled out beginning to eat her pancakes as the twins let out an excited giggle slapping their hands on their high chair. Laughing Lexa looked to the twins smiling “I know right babies…Auntie O and Auntie Raven haven’t even said Hello have they?” The twins let out another giggle and slap as Octavia and Raven laughed at them_

_“We’re sorry we got distracted by food…family trait I think” Raven responded standing up chewing the rest of the pancake as she walked round to the twins kneeling in front of them she leant forward kissing them both on the forehead lovingly “Good Morning my lovely niece and nephew, how are you two doing?” As the twins began googling and making all the baby noises that they good as they both wriggled excitedly at their Auntie Raven, Lexa Clarke and Octavia continued with their conversation,_

_“So what’s the plan today O? Where are you taking my beautiful wife and what do you plan on doing with her?” Lexa smiled out smirking as Clarke rolled her eyes at her_

_“Well put simply Lex…I’m taking her shopping shopping shopping….oh and lot shopping…”_

_“Ah ok so I should make some space in the closet then huh?”_

_“Ahhhh babe you’re the best….that would be amazing…” Clarke responded standing up and leaning across the table with her hand taking hold of Lexa’s and smirking at her._

_“Clarke’s right Lex you’re an amazing wife….letting her take over your side of the closet” Octavia added in laughing softly at her friends_

_“Wow hey there now…..I never said anything about clearing out my stuff” Lexa responded smirking at Octavia and Clarke’s smiles and laughs. “Either way what time can I expect you back? I just need to know how long I have to put up with goo goo eyes over there” Lexa finished nodding her head towards Raven who was still talking to the twins._

_“Well I was thinking we’d go shopping for a few hours then have some lunch then do some more shopping and then possibly come back here for about 3pm…is that ok by you Ms Woods?” Octavia smirked turning and half looking at her best friend smiling_

_“Sounds perfect” Clarke responded smiling at Octavia as she finished her last sip of coffee “Now let’s get going I’m looking forward to this” Clarke smiled as she stood up moving in front of the twins she knelt down as Raven smiled at her walking back to her seat next to Lexa. Looking at the twins Clarke pushed back the sudden twins of sadness she was feeling at having to leave her twins even if it was for a few hours “Mommy is going out with Aunt Octavia, and maybe I’ll bring you both a present back with me….but only if you promise to look after Mama for me…” Clarke smiled as Oscar let out a massive baby gurl not even a second later Olivia did the same thing both of them looking happily at their Mommy “Ok, that’s a deal then I love you both and I’ll see you very soon” Clarke smiled leaning forward kissing both the twins on the forehead before turning back to Octavia for a second “O let’s go now…before I can make myself” Clarke walked quickly towards the front door as she reached it she was stopped by a hand turning her around until she came face to face with Lexa_

_“Your not a bad mom, just because you want some you time doesn’t make you a bad mom ok?” Clarke didn’t speak, it always amazed her that Lexa was able to read her so easily like it was natural for her “I know you and I know that’s what your thinking….this is me, I want you to have a break not because you’re a bad mom or because your not copying but because you blow me away everyday with how amazing you are at looking after them, you never moan or complain you just do it, because you love them with everything you have…and because of that I wanted to treat you, you deserve this day off Clarke so please for me and the twins and more importantly for you….enjoy it….”_

_Clarke couldn’t seem to find the words she needed to say. It was like nothing she thought of was thanks enough for her wife, stepping forward she placed her hands on Lexas cheeks pulling her forward gently until Chests and hips pressed together, connecting their lips she passionately kissed her wife letting all the love she felt flow into the kiss. After a minute or two she pulled back smiling at her wife “Thank you”_

_“Don’t mention it”_

_“Yeah don’t mention it….come on Clarke let’s go before this turns into a full on make out session” Octavia let out laughing as she walked out of the kitchen and past Clarke grabbing her best friends hand opening the door as she did so pulling a now laughing Clarke through the door with her._

 

* * *

 

  **Boston University Hospital**

** Family Waiting Room 21:18 **

Clarke and Raven sat in the family waiting room, the same place they’d been sat for the last few hours patiently waiting to hear back any news on Lexa or in fact on Roan. Clarke had spent most of those hours pacing back and forth then sitting down rocking and then pacing again, the whole time tears had been rushing from her eyes. Raven on the other hand had remained in the corner of the room that faced the door, looking at the door and waiting, her twin sisters blood still on her hands and clothes, her face dry of tears a stoned expression covering it the whole time not revealing anything she was feeling. She hadn’t spoken a word to Clarke since they’d entered that room together after being shown into it by a nurse ok duty. They were told to wait there and that as soon as there was any news they’d be told. An hour into waiting Clarke had gone outside to get some fresh air whilst outside she called Octavia telling her about Ravens state. Octavia asked her to keep talking to Raven telling her all the little tricks Lexa had taught her over the years, as the hours went on and none of them worked Clarke kept her best friend updated whilst at the same time keeping in contact with Bellamy hoping he’d soon be telling her that Roan had been found. They’d heard nothing about Roan being caught and in the back of Clarke’s mind she kept thinking about Roan coming to the hospital and finishing what he’d started. She was about to start talking to Raven again when the sound of the door finally filled the room and Raven and Clarke’s attention shoot to the door as Abby walked into the room they both noticed she was still wearing her blood covered scrubs. Standing up Clarke moved forwards to her Mom, who instantly grabbed hold of her hand, Raven pushed herself off the wall and walked forward stopping so she was close enough to the two women but also far enough away. Raven and Clarke looked intently at Abby trying in their minds to read Abby’s body language. Every second that went by felt like it lasted an eternity to both of them, so much so that when Abby spoke they both felt a pang of relief rise inside them;

 

“Are you both ready to hear this?” Abby cautiously asked the two women, as soon as her eyes had landed on them she could tell they were both still processing everything that had happened over the last few hours. When they both nodded their heads softly at her she slowly continued “Ok….Lexa is being stitched up right now, she sustained three stab wounds to her abdomen mainly over to the right, the wounds were bigger in dimension on her back, which means she was stabbed from behind, all three wounds missed all major arteries and internal organs, however we realised quickly that the knife had done some serious damage to the muscles that cover those vital organs that lead us to check over those muscles the best we could, which led to us to find a small bleed to one of her veins, now I know that sounds scary but like I said the knife didn’t hit any major arteries, it did nick on of her veins which caused the high amount of bleeding both of you witnessed. Once we located the bleed we were able to stitch it and stop it, however the damage to the muscle wasn’t as simple to fix…”

 

“How do you mean?”

 

“The muscle was cut through completely almost separating it into two different sections, we managed to stitch one of it together but it was too risky to stitch the whole thing, if we did it could have caused some long-term damage to the muscle which would make it very painful for Lexa to do standard things, so much so breathing would become very painful for her”

 

“So what does that mean?”

 

“It means that she will be in hospital or a while, we will have to monitor the muscle as it repairs...we are hoping that the muscle will reappear itself to a degree, if it does then she won’t experience any discomfort except for any time when she overexerts herself.”

 

“But long term, how is it looking?”

 

“Like I said Clarke, there was a lot of damage done to the muscle, along with the damage to the artery itself and the extensive bleeding she suffered….due to all those injuries along with the physical beating she quite clearly suffered…we can’t predict how things will go”

 

“You mean she could still die?” Clarke held back the tears as she forced herself to ask the question, she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear the answer but right now she needed to know the answer no matter how painful it was.

 

“We cant be sure Clarke….but knowing Lexa I know she can pull through this, the major injuries are at the moment under control, we are watching her very closely and we will continue to watch her over the coming weeks, at the moment we are waiting for Lexa to wake up…once she does we’ll have a better idea of where to go with treatment…I know its hard to take in something that isn’t certain, but please both of you listen to me….Lexa is a fighter, and I’ve seen people come through worse and survive…right now she needs support, sit with her and talk to her, it will stimulate her brain into action…her body is healing already we just need to give her time…when she wakes up we will get a better idea of what affects this has had on her body…I know that doesn’t help or ease the worries that you have but at the moment that’s all I can tell you”

 

“So its 50/50 at the moment?” Raven finally asked her eyes almost blank of any emotions except anger

 

“Yes, unfortunately at the moment all we can saw is its 50/50, we’ve done everything we can now it’s up to Lexa”

 

“Can we go see her?” Clarke asked squeezing her mom’s hand tightly as tears escaped her eyes rushing quickly down her cheeks.

 

“She’s being brought down from recovery now…I’ll show you to ICU…” The letters felt bitter on Abby’s lips as she said them but she needed them both to know where Lexa was going to be.

 

“How long until she’s awake?” Raven asked, again cold and anger filling her voice and her eyes

 

“We cant be sure Raven”

 

“Ok” Raven let out, walking past Clarke and Abby and out of the room. Turning towards the exit, her actions shocking Clarke and Abby. Clarke quickly ran after her sister in law, following her outside not wanting to disturb anyone else in the hospital as they rushed through it. Once she was close enough to Raven she grabbed hold of her wrist turning her on the spot so they were face to face;

 

“What the hell are you doing Raven? ….Lexa needs you right now and your running away…”

 

“I’M NOT RUNNING AWAY” Raven shouted out pulling her arm roughly from Clarke’s grip and staring her straight in the eyes.

 

“Then WHAT THE HELL do you call this?”

 

“I’m doing what you, Bellamy , the police and nobody else has the guts to do…and what I KNOW they won’t do, I’m gonna find Roan and when I do, god help him because I’m not going to stop until he feels every SINGLE ounce of fear that she felt, I’m gonna make him pay for what he did…” Raven angrily let out tears rushing down her face, as her face contorted with pure anger. “This is all down to him….she could di…”

 

“NO…Don’t you dare use her being in here as a reason to go beat someone up…Look at me Raven…” Clarke firmly said looking at Raven grabbing her hands and holding her in place as she looked into Raven’s eyes. “This isn’t what Lexa would want Raven…you know that as well as I do, she wouldn’t want you getting in trouble and risking your whole family, everything you both have worked years for because your uncontrollably angry…she won’t die Raven because she won’t give up on me and the twins…or on you, she’s never given up or left you Raven, don’t walk away from her now…not when she needs you the most…”

 

“So what happens to Roan huh….and Nia…they both get away with what they did to her….”

 

“They’ll get whatever is coming to them, Bellamy is out there now searching for them, he won’t give up you know that, he will find Roan and when he does Roan will go to prision where he belongs…Do you really think that when Lexa wakes up the first thing she’ll hear is me telling her you’ve been arrested for attacking Roan?”

 

“I’m doing this for her”

 

“No your not Raven….your doing this because your angry, do you really think that in all the years me and Lexa have been together that she never once told me how you handle being upset…because she did, she told me so many things about you that I know you just as well as I know her….I get you don’t know what to do, and the one person youd turn to in this world isn’t there to talk to…shes in there righting for us Raven, I understand your rage but right now anything could be happening to her, she could be awake for all we know and yet I’m trying to convince you to stay with you twin sister instead of beating someone up….tell me, does that sound like something she deserves?”

 

“No”

 

“Then woman the hell up and come back inside with me…because your not the only one who’s scared of losing her…”

 

Raven looked at Clarke for a second contemplating her sister in law’s words, she knew she was right but the anger she felt inside right now was raging away at every piece of her that spoke any sense. Her mind raced and thought over what could happen if she found Roan, she could be put in prison for hurting him, he could hurt her…and then the thought hit her, what would happen if she died trying to get vengeance, what would happen to her wife and her son, how would Lexa feel waking up hearing shed been killed…she knew her sister and she knew she’d blame herself. And she didn’t want that, she didn’t want Lexa to feel the pain she was right now and that pain no matter how buried was unbearable in itself. Closing her eyes she thought about the conversation her and Lexa would have right now, how Lexa would most likely tell her to calm the hell down and think before she acted, to think about Zachary and how he’d feel not having his Mama there anymore in whatever form, and about Octavia and how devastated her wife would be as well. It was then she knew she had to stop herself from doing something stupid, and the only person that could stop her was her sister, so right now she needed to see her, no matter if she was awake or not she needed to make sure that the other part of her was still physically there. Without a word to Clarke she removed her hands from Clarke’s hold and walked back into the hospital to find Abby, she knew she had a decision to make about getting revenge but right now Lexa was more important to her…her revenge whether or not it was right could wait for a few hours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo I hope it wasn't that bad and that you all got where I was going with this Part of the chapter. Please feel free to leave a comment giving your opinions. As long as you word them politely I'm happy to hear everyone's opinions :-)


	31. Flashes of Light Part Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO before I start anything below I just wanna take a moment to say to anyone that was affected by Hurricane Irma over the last week plus, I hope you and your families are all safe and that the damage to your or your family’s homes weren’t too bad. You have all been in my thoughts and I hope and pray that none of you were seriously injured by the hurricane…Your all in my thoughts and will continue to be, I hope you are all safe and well…LOVE TOO YOU ALL….STAY SAFE…
> 
> Anyways, I'll keep it simple and sweet, I apologise for the delay in getting this chapter finished and uploaded :-) I have been a little distracted recently when it comes to writing this chapter, but this chapter is about 11,000 words long a little longer and has two longish flashbacks :-) Thank you to those that have given kudos or left a comment on the last chapter and this story itself I appreciate you all taking the time :-) Anyway I wont go on any more lol I hope you all enjoy this chapter and I look forward to hearing all your comments :-)

** Chapter 29-Flashes of Light-Part Three **

**-Intensive Care Unit (Boston University Hospital)-**

** Monday 3rd April 2017-10:00am **

It had been four days since Leda had been brought into hospital and in those days, that had passed by neither Clarke or Raven had left the hospital for longer than ten minutes. Both of them staying in that room most of the day only leaving when the stuffiness of Lexa’s room became too much for them and they need fresh air. They would even go and grab coffee and food for each other and eat and drink whilst they stared through the window that looked into the room the whole time keeping an eye on Lexa incase anything changed. Every single day was becoming a struggle for Clarke, Raven would barely speak to her most of the day only saying a few sentences on occasions which made this already lonely situation even more lonely, and she was missing the twins she knew that her dad was looking after them and they weren't aware of what had happened which was good but it also meant that she had to tell them at some point and the thought of the was overwhelming, as was the anger she was beginning to feel every time Bellamy called her and told her they hadn't found Roan yet, every time it would cause more anger to bubble inside her until she would hold onto Lexa's hand and hope for a response, every time she didn’t get one it made her realise how much she needed to be there no matter how much she wanted to go home.

 

She knew she needed to be there when Lexa woke up, in fact she didn’t just need to be there she wanted to be there, after everything that her and Lexa had been through no matter how much she thought this might be her fault that she might have been able to change what happened to Lexa somehow, she knew that when her wife opened her eyes If she wasn’t there that was something Lexa wouldn’t be able to forget or forgive and it was something she herself wouldn’t be able to forgive herself for. Looking up at the clock she noticed it was 10:02am and she knew that meant one of the nurse was going to come into the room and clean out Lexa's wounds and change the dressing on them as well as giving her another course of antibiotics and pain relief to help reduce the pain when she eventually woke up as well as probably replacing the now almost empty IV bag that connected and flowed into the veins on Lexa's left arm. Looking at Raven she noticed the woman didn't move from her spot instead she just watched as the nurse entered the room. She was about to try and politely suggest they go get something to drink when her phone buzzed. Looking down at it she read the message from Octavia telling her to come to the family room down the hall. Clarke wasn’t sure why she needed to buy a break from this room wasn’t a bad thing and she knew the nurses would call her if anything changed looking to Raven she stood up not saying a word she walked over to her sister in law and held the phone in front of her so she could see the message, without a word Raven stood up and walked towards the door, turning and following she smiled softly at the nurse who she knew as Trisha softly speaking;

 

"I'm just gonna go to the family room for a break, can you call me if anything changes please?"

 

"Of course, Mrs Woods, you'll be the first to know"

 

"Thank you Trisha" Clarke genuinely responded walking towards and then through the door seeing Raven was waiting for her. Silently they walked to the family room as the turned the final corner of three they saw Octavia standing outside waiting for them before she could do more than smile at her best friend the image of Raven walking quickly to Octavia passed her by. She watched on as Raven walked as fast as she could to Octavia seeing their eyes connect moments before Raven was wrapped around Octavia her head buried in her wife's shoulder as Octavia held on tightly to her. Clarke watched on as all of the emotions that Raven had kept locked away over the last four days came bubbling to the surface as she held onto her wife. Walking towards them Clarke softly smiled at Octavia signalling she’d wait inside the room for them. Octavia returned the smile with her own not releasing or loosening the firm hold her arms had on Raven. Placing her hand on the door Clarke pushed it forward walking into the room her attention on the door itself until two small voices filled her ears;

 

“MOMMY”

 

At the word Clarke’s head popped up seeing the twins running towards her as fast as they could as her dad watched on from a couch to the right of her, a small smile on his face. Before she could process anything, the twins were crashing into her legs hugging them tightly, the motion making her smile and laugh more than in a second than she had in the whole four days that had passed her by in this hospital, breaking their grip, she knelt down holding her arms out widely wanting nothing more than to hug her babies right now. Seeing the motion their Mommy was making Olivia and Oscar lunged forward hugging their Mommy as tightly as they could manage to with all the excitement and happiness they were feeling. As she felt the twins holding on to her tightly, Clarke closed her eyes and simply enjoyed the moment she was having with them right now after days of only talking to them on the phone. Minutes passed them by so many that Clarke wasn’t even sure how many, when she finally opened her eyes she caught her dad sadly smiling at her and the twins, taking a small breath in she realised he was probably eager to hear about Lexa’s current condition. Squeezing the twins tightly once more she released her hold on them, standing up she took hold of their hands guiding them to sit down on the couch opposite where her father was sitting. Before she had a chance to say a word to her dad Oscar jumped onto the couch snuggling himself into her right side, wrapping her right arm around her son she smiled as Olivia moved between her legs, placing her hands on her Mommy’s thighs as she looked up at her and softly asked;

 

“Mommy, are you coming home now?”

 

“Not right now baby…” Clarke felt the tears building and burning at the back of her eyes as she swallowed back her the lump that had tried to form in her throat, the sadness was clear in Olivia’s voice and in both the twins’ reaction to seeing her. “I know it’s weird not seeing me everyday but Mommy is really needed here”

 

“Will you come back home soon?”

 

“Maybe, I can’t promise you I’ll be home soon because I don’t know”

 

“Ok…..” Clarke watched as Olivia looked to her brother, the two of them exchanging a silent look before Olivia thought for a second then spoke again “Were we bad Mommy?”

 

“What?” Clarke asked looking at the two of them before she tightened her arm around Oscar placing a kiss on his head before she reached her left arm forward and pulled Olivia into a hug, placing a kiss on her head as well. “No, I promise, neither of you were bad…it’s just that…I just need to…”

 

Before Clarke could speak she heard the door of the family room close shut and a voice speak “Mommy is right neither of you were bad…” Looking up Clarke saw Raven and Octavia standing near the door holding hands, she noticed the smile that Raven was sending her way and returned it with a sad one of her own. Releasing Octavia’s hand Raven moved forward sitting down on the couch so Oscar was now between her and Clarke. Neither twin moved an inch instead they chose to stay close to their Mommy. “See you both have to listen to me right now, but you have to listen very carefully and let me finish ok?” Both Oscar and Olivia nodded their heads softly as Clarke sent a thankful smile Raven’s way. “Mommy and I have had to stay at the hospital for the last few days, I know Grandpa told you that Mommy was helping Grandma and that Mama was staying with me because I needed looking after, but that was a little lie…which I know is really bad because we shouldn’t lie. But Mommy didn’t want you to get upset…..see Mama is really sick, and we can’t make her better at the moment, but Grandma has been looking after her and Mommy has been watching her every single minute of the day…And we spoke to Grandma and she told us that the medicine is working…” Seeing the upset creeping onto the twins’ faces Raven shuffled closer to them and continued “But listen, you guys don’t need to be sad or upset because Me and Mommy are going to make sure that Mama is all better really soon”

 

“Is Mama sick because we were bad?” Oscar sadly asked looking up at his Auntie Raven as he continued to snuggle into his Mommy.

 

“No, see that’s not how being sick works…sometimes we just get sick because we get too cold or even too hot sometimes…we can’t help it or stop it and it’s not because we or someone else is bad, it’s just how things work sometimes…does that make sense? …”

 

“Like Livy not being able to have strawberries? It’s not because she’s bad it’s just because her body doesn’t like it”

 

“Exactly like that”

 

“Will Mama be better soon?”

 

“I hope so, but until Mama is better would you be ok with staying with Grandma and Grandpa? You’d still go to school and have fun times with your friends, but you wouldn’t see Mommy every single day…but you’d talk to her on the phone just like you have been the last four days…do you think you’d both be ok with that?”

 

“Can we see Zachary and Aunt Tavia?”

 

“I’m sure Aunt Tavia can bring Zachary over for a sleepover in a few days, and maybe she can pick you sometimes as well”

 

“That’s ok…. right Livy?” Oscar sweetly responded looking down at his sister who nodded her head at her brother before leaning her head forward a little against her Mommy’s chest, holding onto her a little more now she knew her Mama was sick.

 

“Well then, I’ll make sure it happens” Raven watched as her Oscar looked at her questioningly before he removed himself from his Mommy’s hold moving the small space across the couch he stopped at her legs, looking down at her nephew she could see the questions in whirling around in his mind. Smiling softly at him she asked “What’s wrong Oz? …You can ask me anything”

 

“Can we see Mama?”

 

“Well Mama isn’t awake, see because she was sick the doctor made her go to sleep so that she can get better sooner…So she wouldn’t be able to speak to you or play with you”

 

“But I wanna see Mama…. I’ll be good”

 

“You have to ask Mommy”

 

Oscar turned to look at his Mommy his small face silently he asked, “Can I go see Mama please Mommy?”

 

“I don’t know Oz, it might be a little scary for you” Clarke soothingly responded her left hand running through Olivia’s hair repeatedly as she looked at her son. “Like Aunt Raven said, Mama is asleep so she can’t talk to you or play, and there are machines that are connected to Mama and they make a little noise that you might not like”

 

“I don’t care Mommy…I want to see Mama, I have to tell her things”

 

“Ok…just let Mommy have a few minutes with Grandpa then I’ll take you to see Mama”

 

“I can take him now if you like Clarke” Raven interjected looking at her sister in law and offering her a small smile of confidence.

 

“Yeah Mommy please….I wanna see Mama now” Oscar pleaded sweetly and innocently looking up at his Mommy his sad face almost identical to his Mama’s.

 

Clarke knew she couldn’t resist the small sad face, she never could when it came to Lexa and she knew she couldn’t with their son either. Smiling at her son she nodded her head softly “Ok, but if you get upset then Auntie Rae will bring you back here, whether you want to come or not, ok?”

 

“Ok Mommy….” Oscar sweetly responded moving forward and hugging his Mommy tightly placing a small kiss on her cheek “Thank you Mommy, I love you loads and loads”

 

“Your welcome baby boy, and I love you too Oscar” Clarke watched as her son moved back to Raven and hugged her tightly, looking down at Olivia she smiled softly as Olivia looked up at her. Softly she asked her daughter “Do you want to see Mama too?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy “Ok, you can go with Auntie Rae too if you want” Olivia shook her head at her Mommy looking at her “No, you want to go with Mommy later then?” Olivia nodded her head softly at her Mommy “Ok baby girl, you can come with me in a little while” Clarke soothingly informed her daughter continuing to move her hand through her daughter’s hair gently leaning forward she placed a kiss on Olivia’s head. “You can take him through to see Lexa now Rae”

 

“Ok thanks, come on then handsome, how about we grab a hot chocolate on the way huh?” Oscar nodded his head at his Auntie Raven, smiling softly at her as he continued to hug her tightly. Standing up Raven lifted him with her guessing that he was still a little scared at the thought of his Mama being sick. Holding him against her chest she smiled at Clarke and Olivia one more time before she smiled at her wife heading towards the door. Without a word, Octavia stood up and followed her wife and nephew out of the room, before she left the room she nodded her head towards Jake and Olivia letting Clarke silently know that she was giving them some time alone. Once Clarke nodded her head softly acknowledging that she understood, Octavia continued to follow her wife out of the room. Once the door closed Clarke looked over to her father motioning her head downwards to Olivia letting him silently know that she wanted a few more minutes with her daughter. When he smiled at her, she lifted her daughter from between her legs onto her chest moving herself backwards on the couch until her back hit the back of the couch, leaning back against it she leant her chin against Olivia’s forehead feeling her daughter adjust herself slightly, leaning into her more and wrapping her arms loosely around her, closing her eyes Clarke ignored everything buzzing inside her head instead just relaxing with her daughter in her arms.

 

* * *

 

  **Flashback: Arkadia High School**

** -Thursday 14 th May 2009 **

_Clarke, Octavia, Roan, Monty, Harper, Jasper and Maya were all sat in the courtyard at their usual table at the back of the courtyard, a table that gave them a view of pretty much the whole courtyard except for the one table behind them. There wasn’t much really to see the courtyard was in the middle of the school, it was a massive space surrounded by the Science block, the English Block and the canteen along with the hallways that led to the hallway and the assembly hall of the Arkadia High. The seven of them were eating their lunch waiting for Lexa and Raven to join them, they had planned to wait but Raven had texted Octavia telling them her and Lexa were caught up with something and to start without them. They had started off talking about their days but eventually all of them had given in to their hunger and stopped talking in favour of eating their lunches. Octavia was the first to finish her food as soon as she finished her final mouthful her eyes began darting around the courtyard at the four different hallways that Raven and Lexa could come from, everyone watched her amused as they knew she was waiting for her girlfriend to appear so they could engage in their usual lunchtime make out session. The longer she waited the more her hands and feet began to move about, her feet tapping on the ground underneath them whilst her fingers tapped on metal surface her arms were resting on. The action causing all the others at the table to continue to look at her in complete amusement, some of them trying to supress the laughs that were escaping their mouths. She ignored them and all the silly noises they made, continuing to look around for her girlfriend. She must have been looking for about ten minutes when Raven finally came into her view, a massive smile spread across her face as Raven and Lexa exited the door the led to the science block. As Raven noticed her looking their way she nudged Lexa softly as a massive smile spread across her face as she looked over at Octavia, without a second thought Octavia got up ignoring the comments, whistles and noises coming from her friends she made a beeline for her girlfriend walking over to her. Once she was close enough Raven moved forward wrapping her arms around Octavia at the same time the slightly older brunette lunged forward quickly wrapping her arms around Raven’s neck hugging her like they’d been apart for months not hours. It had been about two months since Lexa had transferred to Arkadia high and in that time, she’d become used to her sister and Octavia doing the same thing every lunch time. Shaking her head, she walked past them walking over to the table and sitting down in the free space across from Clarke smiling at the blonde._

_Ignoring the looks and laughter that normally came from her sister and her friends, Raven pulled back slightly so she could see Octavia’s face looking into her girlfriend’s eyes as she watched Octavia bite the corner of her lip and speak “I missed you” Raven smiled brightly at the brunette and leant forward connecting their lips together, letting herself get lost in the feeling of her lips connecting and moving with her girlfriends. She deepened the kiss slightly feeling Octavia tightening her arms around her neck, pressing their bodies closer together, forgetting and completely ignoring everything and everyone around them. Minutes passed by before they finally pulled apart, as they did Raven pecked Octavia on the lips numerous times before she responding to her girlfriend’s comment minutes ago “I missed you too” Kissing Octavia one more time as she brunette smiled, Raven released her arms from around Octavia’s waist as Octavia removed her arms from around Raven’s neck, letting her hand fall next to her girlfriends, allowing Raven to take her hand in hers as they always did. Walking over to the others hand in hand they rolled their eyes at their friends as they wolf whistled and shouted numerous comments including ‘Damn that was hot’ and ‘About time you broke apart’. Once the comments stopped Raven looked to her twin and softly said “You still hungry?”_

_“You mean after you kept me waiting for twenty minutes, whilst you munched on your girlfriend’s face? ….” Lexa watched the unamusement fill her sisters face before she let out a laugh and continued “I’m starving”_

_“Good well come on then” Raven said ignoring the raised eyebrows her sister sent her way, turning around her and Octavia walked happily towards the canteen knowing Lexa would catch them up. Lexa shook her head at her twins insanely consistent routine, the same thing would happen everyday, Raven would ask her the same question everyday and everyday she’d come up with a witty remark. But that wasn’t the only thing that happened everyday, everyday she’d tell herself she would talk more to Clarke and ask her to hang out on their own sometime, and everyday without fail she’d never be able to find the right words, mainly because everyday she’d see Roan giving her a stern look from across the table a look that made her slightly unnerved. She wasn’t sure if he was homophobic or if he just didn’t like her or even if him and Clarke had a thing in secret, she’d spoken to Raven about it and her sister had told her that Clarke wasn’t into men but still she wondered. As she stood up and removed herself from the seat she caught up with her sister and Octavia who had saved her a space in the queue, she joined them standing behind her sister as the two women stood in front of her, Raven’s right arm wrapped around Octavia’s shoulders, her hand draping off Octavia’s right shoulder, Octavia’s right hand holding onto Raven’s hand as they looked over the food options, occasionally exchanging a kiss and a few words. Choosing their food and drinks, Raven and Lexa realised they’d chosen the same food and drink, something that usually happened whenever they choose from a menu, they both noticed Octavia’s slight amusement as they paid for the food and drink. Once they had paid and they had begun walking back to the table Raven looked to Lexa and asked, “So are you finally gonna ask her?”_

_Stopping to pick a knife and fork along with some salt and pepper sachets, Lexa looked at Raven raising an eyebrow she asked, “What are you talking about?”_

_“You know exactly what I’m talking about Lex”_

_“Fine, your right I know…” Lexa started turning and looking at her sister, seeing the smirk of satisfaction on Raven’s face at being told she was right “I like Clarke ok, and yeah you said she like girls too…but that doesn’t mean she likes me…just because we both like girls…”_

_“Seriously Lex…. Step up, Octavia is Clarke’s best friend, they’ve been friends for half their lives, O wouldn’t let me encourage you to ask her out if Clarke didn’t like you”_

_“You’re just saying that”_

_“No, I’m not Lex…you like her, just ask her out and see where it goes…remember what you told me when I told you I didn’t know whether to ask O out or not?”_

_“Yeah…I said, you don’t know unless you ask”_

_“Exactly….so just ask her out”_

_“Look I get it Rae, your trying to help me just please let me do this my way”_

_“Fine sis…but at least spend some more time with her, get to know each other and go from there…you might get a pleasant surprise sis” Raven finished winking at her sister as her and Octavia walked past Lexa and headed to the table Clarke and the rest of their friends were still sat at. Shaking her head, internally thinking that she hated it when her sister made sense, Lexa walked over to the table seeing the seat opposite Clarke was still the only seat available, thanks to Octavia sitting herself on Raven’s lap as her girlfriend ate her food with one hand whilst the other was wrapped around Octavia’s waist. Walking over to the table she sat herself down opposite Clarke, smiling brightly at the blonde before she turned her attention to her lunch, beginning to eat before she ran out of time. As she ate her food she listened to the conversation between her new-found friends, listening as they went from subject to subject, by the time she was finished she knew she only had a few minutes left of her lunch break. Looking up at her sister instantly she noticed her twin sister staring at her with raised eyebrows, ignoring her sisters look she opened her can of drink beginning to drink it looking up at Clarke the two women exchanged a smile, Clarke was about to say something when the bell signalling lunch was over. Lexa watched as Clarke’s face filled with a look of frustration as the Blonde stood up from her seat saying goodbye to everyone before she headed towards the English block._

_Closing her eyes in annoyance Lexa decided the bite the metaphorical bullet as it was called, opening her eyes she looked to her sister; “Can you sort these for me please?” She asked motioning to her empty tray and half-drunk can of drink. Raven quickly nodded her head motioning for her sister to get move. Smiling at the motion Lexa quickly stood up running across the courtyard in the direction Clarke had gone, as she rushed through the door she noticed the blonde at the end of the hallway, continuing to rush forward until she was close enough to call out to Clarke, as they turned the corner Lexa called out to the blonde “Clarke”. She watched as the blonde stopped in her tracks turning to see who had called her name, a smile spreading across her face as her eyes landed on Lexa._

_“Oh hey”_

_“Hey…Sorry to run after you”_

_“It’s fine, is everything ok?”_

_“Yeah, I just wanted to ask you something”_

_“Umm…” Was all Clarke managed to get out before someone barged past her causing her to drop the two books she had in her hands, instantly Lexa knelt down picking the books up, not giving Clarke the chance to pick the books up, the action made Clarke smile even more, as she stood up she handed to books to Clarke, gently placing her left hand on Clarke’s right arm pushing against it softly as she moved with Clarke to the side a little “What did you wanna ask me?” Clarke asked hoping it was the question she’d been waiting for Lexa to ask since they met months ago._

_“Huh…. oh yeah, I was wondering if you could maybe help me with something?” Lexa lied for some reason she couldn’t work up the courage to just ask Clarke on a date, so for once she took her sisters advice and decided that getting to know Clarke first may be the better option. Though she could have sworn she saw disappointed on the blonde’s face when she asked for help with something._

_“What do you need help with?”_

_“Art…. Rae says your great a drawing and sketching, so I was wondering if you’d be able to help me out with my art project, I completely suck at anything art related and well…I need help”_

_“Sure, I don’t know what I can do to help but I’m happy to try and help you the best I can”_

_“Thank you, that’d be great….so maybe we could get some food after school and as thanks for your help I can pay for the food” Lexa added trying her best not to make it sound like a date. “Or we can go to a park or wherever, whatever you want really”_

_“We could go to the park today I suppose, there’s plenty of stuff around to draw then…and there’s a park close by that does amazing milkshakes”_

_“Great, sounds perfect”_

_“It does” Clarke responded tightening her grip on her books as she smiled brightly at the brunette in front of her. She wasn’t sure if Lexa wanted to be friends or if she wanted more, but the chance to spend more time with the Brunette wasn’t something she wanted to pass up._

_“Great….so how about we meet at 3:30 in the car park and I can drive us there”_

_“We can walk it’s not that far and I have my car as well so it might be a little easier for us”_

_“Ok, so I’ll meet you in the car park at 3:30 and we’ll walk to the park together, that ok?”_

_“That’s perfect”_

_“Awesome….” Lexa responded unable to control the massive smile that was covering her face. Realising the bell had gone minutes ago, she shook her head softly continuing “I’ll let you get on anyone, I don’t wanna get you in trouble with Mrs Vault”_

_“Yeah, that wouldn’t be good” Clarke smiled back, subconsciously licking her lips “So I’ll see you in couple hours then”_

_“Yeah, see you later” Lexa finished smiling before beginning to walk backwards “I better go, Raven’s probably waiting impatiently for me to come back so we can get to Economics class….” Walking backwards she watched as Clarke nodded her head and slowly began walking to her class “Bye Clarke” She added as she walked backwards until she was at the corner, she watched Clarke softly as the blonde just laughed then turned and walked towards her classroom. Once the blonde was out of sight Lexa fist pumped the air internally yelling ‘Yes’ before she turned and walked quickly to the entrance door of the building seeing her sister waiting at the door for her, she smiled brightly to herself hoping the next few hours flew by._

__

* * *

 

** Boston University Hospital-Monday 3rd April 2017 **

** Intensive Care Unit **

Raven walked into Lexa’s hospital room with Oscar, holding their hot chocolates in the cup holder they were placed in with her left hand, whilst her right hand tentatively held onto Oscar’s hand as the little boy slowly walked beside her. Feeling him stop in his tracks, she looked back at Octavia seeing her wife standing in the doorway giving her a supportive nod, turning her attention back to Oscar she looked down at him seeing the slight fear in his face, gently smiling at her nephew she gave him a small nod of encouragement. Oscar looked up at his Auntie Rae his hand dropping from hers as he looked at the image of his sleeping Mama in front of him, the fear clearly pouring into his face. Seeing the actions of her nephew, Raven moved over to the cabinet that was placed next to her sister’s bed, placing the cups down on the top of the cabinet she turned walking back over to Oscar, kneeling down in front of him she gain his attention before she spoke; “Oz…. I know this is really scary but Mama is ok, I promise you” Still seeing her nephew’s face was filled with fear she decided to try another way “What’s scaring you Oz? You tell me and I can tell you why it’s not scary…how does that sound?” Raven watched as Oscar looked behind her at his Mama and all the machines that were around her, as he looked back to her, he shuffled on his feet slightly his left hand moving up and grabbing onto his Auntie Rae’s t-shirt covered shoulder, as her gripped onto the material of the t-shirt his right hand lifted into the air and pointed in the direction of his Mama, looking back to his Auntie Rae he quietly asked;

 

“What does that one do?”

 

Looking around Raven noticed that Oscar was pointing to heart monitor machine, looking back to her nephew she looked at him smiling warmly “That machine monitors Mama’s heartbeat, and if it gets too low or too high then it makes a loud noise that tells the nurses that Mama needs their help to get her heartbeat back to normal”

 

“What’s monitor mean?”

 

“It means to keep an eye on something”

 

“Ok…” Oscar silently let out looking around the room before pointing to the IV bag that was hanging on a metal pole next to the heart monitor. “What is that one?”

 

“That is a IV bag, it gets fluids into Mama’s body whilst she’s asleep”

 

“Why does Mama need it?”

 

“Well, you know how when your thirty you get a drink?” Oscar nodded his head at his Auntie Rae’s question “Right now Mama isn’t able to get a drink when she’s thirsty, but her body still needs water and fluids, so the doctors and nurses put something called an IV line into Mama’s arm, that line starts in the IV bag and then goes down the line and into Mama’s arm keeping her body filled with all the fluids she needs.”

 

“Ok…. what is that thing on Mama’s face?”

 

“That’s an oxygen mask, it makes sure that Mama is getting all the Oxygen that she needs…because she’s asleep and she has a bad tummy that could mean that Mama isn’t getting as much Oxygen as she should be getting, so they put that mask over Mama’s mouth and nose to make sure that she’s getting all the Oxygen that she needs too to wake up”

 

“Are they loud?”

 

“No, not really…the only machine that is really loud is the heart monitor and that only makes noise when Mama isn’t doing so well” Raven looked back to Octavia seeing the supportive smile on her wife’s face, she looked back to her nephew seeing he was unnerved and she was guessing it was all to do with the machines around his Mama. Moving Oscar gently she looked at him softly speaking “You want me to show you?” Oscar looked at his auntie, then looking behind her at his Mama and then back to his Auntie before nodding his head softly “Ok then, come here” She said opening her arms for him, quickly Oscar moved forward cuddling into his Auntie Raven holding onto her tightly, his small hands gripping at her top like they were a lifeline. Standing up lifting her nephew with her, she walked over to the machines stopping near them giving Oscar some time to look at the machines and listen to the small amount of noise they made. “Can you hear them?” Oscar shook his head softly leaning his head against his Auntie Rae’s shoulder “See they’re not loud, they are really quiet unless you get close…here listen really carefully” She said leaning forward she held onto Oscar as she carefully lifted the mask from her twin sisters mouth, knowing that a few seconds without the oxygen wouldn’t hurt Lexa, also knowing that Lexa would want her to do anything to make Oscar feel safe. Moving closer so Oscar’s ear was near the mask she heard him giggle at the sound of the Oxygen rushing through the mask and gently brushing his cheek;

 

“It tickles”

 

“I told you” She smiled, placing the mask back over Lexa’s mouth and noise standing herself and Oscar up looking at her now smiling nephew. Placing a kiss on his cheek she went to put him down on the bed, but to her surprise he held onto her not releasing his grip on her shirt, as she looked at him he softly spoke;

 

“I wanna stay with you right now”

 

“Ok, you can sit on my lap until you feel comfortable enough to sit with Mama…that sound ok?”

 

“Yeah, but Aunt Tavi has to sit with us”

 

“Alright then” Raven responded smiling and suppressing a laugh at the slight bossiness of her nephew, looking over at her wife who was giggling softly, she smiled at her before walking around the bed and sitting down in the chair Clarke usually sat in, out of the two chairs in the room it was definitely the most comfortable, not by a lot, but when you spent almost every hour of the day sitting down in a chair the small difference turned into a massive one. Placing Oscar on her lap with his back against her chest, she smiled when he shuffled backwards making himself comfortable on her lap as he looked over at his Mama laying in the bed sleeping. Placing a gentle kiss on the side of Oscar’s head she wrapped her arms around her nephew hugging him gently. As she looked to see where Octavia was she saw her wife lifting the chair she normally sat in, she watched as Octavia carried the chair until she was next to her and Oscar, placing the chair down on Raven’s right side then sitting down in it. Keeping her left arm wrapped around Oscar, Raven removed her right arm from around her nephew reaching it over to her wife, who quickly and happily took hold of Raven’s hand with her left hand interlocking their fingers and bringing her right hand to rest on top of their hands. The three of them feel into silence as Oscar’s attention was completely on his Mama watching as her stomach rose and fell every second that went past.

 

* * *

 

** In the Family Room **

Clarke and Olivia were still sat on the couch, since her Oscar, Raven and Octavia had left the room Olivia hadn’t moved from her Mommy’s lap. She’d stayed cuddled into her Mommy holding onto her gently as her Mommy and Grandpa talked over what had happened over the last few days. Clarke listened as her father explained the twins’ behaviour and how they’d had the occasional tantrum during the day, that was until they spoke to her on the phone, he told her how after she’d spoken to them they would go get changed for bed and then cuddle with him on the couch until they fell asleep. He told her that the school had told him their behaviour had changed, which had led to him having to explain what was going on with their Mama at the moment. The teachers gave him their word they would keep an eye on the twins and report everything that changed in their behaviour to him. Clarke listened as her dad told her all about what he and the twins would do at home and how she now had loads of paintings to see when she got home. He told her how good Olivia had been with putting the cream her Grandma had given her on her cut chin every day. How they’d get ready by themselves and brush their teeth like they were supposed to, then they would eat their breakfast and wait to talk to their Mommy patiently before he took them to nursery. He also told her how Olivia had been a little quiet yesterday. That caused Clarke to look down at her daughter and place a gentle kiss on the top of her head, Olivia then looked up and smiled at her softly before resting her head on her Mommy’s shoulder again. Turning her attention back to her dad she asked;

 

“But other than that, they’ve been ok?”

 

“Yeah, they’ve just been missing you and Lexa…they do everything I ask them too, sometimes with a tantrum and sometimes without one…But they’ve not been violent or rude to me at all…I think they just miss you really. Like I said the teacher told me they were playing up at nursery but they were only there two days, I think they’ll be ok tomorrow but we’ll have to see….I think it might have just been the freshness of not being able to see you”

 

“That was probably why.... They’re not really good with things changing, they like things when how they’re used to them being…” Clarke responded her hand gently rubbing up and down her daughters back soothingly. “I’m sorry about this dad…”

 

“Clarke, you don’t need to apologise”

 

“I do…I know your missing work to look after them…I know it’s wrong to push my responsibilities for them onto you…I just…”

 

“You can’t leave her…. I understand Clarke…” Jake soothingly explained, standing up he walked around the table in between the couches and moved to the couch Clarke was sitting on, sitting down next to his daughter he placed a caring and loving hand on her knee, before reaching across and taking her free hand in his. “When your mother had Charlotte there were a lot of complications, ones that meant we we’re sure if she’d pull through or not, I didn’t leave her side once, your Grandma had you for two weeks because I refused to leave your mother’s side for one minute…but I’d call every day to check on you and talk to you on the phone, you’d tell me all about your day, I’d spend every day with your mother and in those weeks she was in hospital unconscious I didn’t see you for the first two weeks…I didn’t even see Charlotte that much either, perhaps every three days when the nurses would bring her down…I know that sounds bad, but your mother is the glue that holds us all together, she makes me…me I suppose…What I’m trying to say is that I understand Clarke, and you don’t need to blame yourself for not wanting to leave your wife…”

 

“I know but I should be there for them…this isn’t easy for them either”

 

“No, it’s not but you’re a mother and a wife…I know that you feel like your abandoning them but you’re not, they need their Mommy and their Mama in their lives…They understand…. they miss you but they understand that right now their Mama needs you more than they do…. Isn’t that right Olivia?” Jake asked gently moving his hand to rub his granddaughters back, he watched as Olivia lifted her head up and nodded softly “See, she understands and so does Oscar, even if she doesn’t want her cream sometimes…She understands your needed here…”

 

“Is that right princess? ….” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy’s words looking up at her Mommy and smiling at her, unknown to Olivia her small face resembled her Mama’s in her Mommy’s eyes, something that brought a natural smile to her face. “You missed me?” Olivia again nodded her head at her Mommy this time pushing off her chest and sitting on her Mommy’s thighs facing her. As her daughter looked up at her a massive smile spreading across her face as her small hands gently played with the material on her Mommy’s shirt. “Hi Princess”

 

“Hi Mommy”

 

“How are you baby? …I’ve missed you so much”

 

“I missed you too Mommy…. loads and lots”

 

“Really…”

 

“Yeah”

 

“Is that why sometimes you don’t let Grandpa put your cream on?”

 

“Nu Huh”

 

“No? …Then why not princess?”

 

“Because I want you to do it Mommy….”

 

“Why me?”

 

“Because it hurts less when you do it Mommy”

 

“Does it?” Olivia sweetly nodded her head at her Mommy, her eyes and face filled with complete innocence. “Ok…did you bring the cream with you?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy looking back at her Grandpa, Jake smiled at his granddaughter before reaching into his pocket and pulled the small tube of cream from his pocket handing it to Olivia who smiled at him thanking him before handing the tube to her Mommy “Thank you Princess…so should we put this cream on then?” Olivia nodded her head sweetly at her Mommy smiling brightly as she looked at her. “You know even if Mommy isn’t there, you have to let grandpa do this?”

 

“But I wanted you to do it Mommy”

 

“I know baby…. but remember what Grandma said?”

 

“Yes…she said I can’t forget to use the cream Mommy”

 

“Exactly….and what did Mama say as well?” Clarke asked her daughter as she undid the top of the tube and placed some of the cream on her finger. Placing a gentle kiss on her daughter’s cheek as she pouted at her

 

“Mama said I have to remember and do what Grandma said”

 

“Yep, so what do you think she’ll think if she wakes up and hears that you haven’t been doing what Grandma said”

 

“She wouldn’t be happy Mommy”

 

“No, she wouldn’t Princess” Clarke responded smiling softly at her pouting daughter as began placing the cream over her daughters now scab covered chin. “But I promise if you start doing it every day without me then I won’t say a word to Mama” She finished as she gently rubbed in the last of the cream on her finger, wiping her finger on her jeans as Olivia sweetly responded

 

“But you’re not meant to keep secrets”

 

“You’re not…. but it’s not really a secret…. it’s more information that Mama doesn’t need to know because her little Princess will be all better soon and it won’t matter”

 

“So, I won’t get in trouble?”

 

“Of course not baby girl, I promise”

 

“Ok Mommy…. I promise I’ll put my creams on everyday….”

 

“Thank you, Princess,”

 

“Your very welcome Mommy”

 

“Am I?” Clarke asked amused at her daughter’s adult response to her thanks. When Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy smiling goofily, Clarke leant forward pecking her daughter numerous times on the cheek making her daughter burst into a fit of laughter, wriggling in her Mommy’s arms, Clarke ceased placing kisses on her daughter’s cheek wrapping her arms around Olivia and hugging her tightly, placing a single kiss on her daughters cheek she kept her face near her daughters and asked “You wanna go see Mama?” She watched as Olivia nervously nodded her head. Seeing the nervousness and worry on her daughter’s face Clarke brushed her hand through her daughter’s hair softly asking her “What’s wrong Princess?”

 

“I’m scared Mommy”

 

“Why are you scared?”

 

“Mama’s sick…and I don’t like it here”

 

“I know you don’t like hospitals baby but sometimes we have to go places we don’t want to, I don’t like it here either but this is the best place for Mama to be so she can get better…and I promise that it’s not that scary, Mama has a few machines connected to her but they are all for a good reason, she’s not in any pain and they don’t make any noise at all…and I’ll tell you what all the machines do before we go in there so you won’t be scared by them or what they look like…And I’ll be there every single second so if you get a little scared then you can just tell me and we can go for a little walk together…how does that sound?”

 

“Good…Is Mama awake?”

 

“No remember she’s sleeping…but I spoke to Grandma and she told me that when we talk to Mama she can hear us, even though she’s not awake”

 

“Can I tell her things?”

 

“Anything you want”

 

“Ok Mommy…. can we go now Mommy? …I wanna see Mama now”

 

“We can go in a minute, I need to talk to Grandpa for a little bit before we go…I need to tell him some stuff…is that ok?” Clarke asked her daughter getting a small smile and nod, she smiled as Olivia leant forward hugging her gently. Seeing a small play area in the corner of the room Clarke decided to use it to her advantage, she knew that what she needed to tell her father wasn’t something she wanted her daughter to hear. Looking down at her daughter as she pushed herself back up Clarke softly spoke “Why don’t you go draw a picture for me while I talk to Grandpa…then I can keep it on me so I don’t miss you as much, and when Mama wakes up I can show her it…that sound good to you” Olivia nodded her head shuffling herself down her Mommy’s legs quickly rushing over to the small play area excitedly finding some paper and crayons and pencils to draw with. Watching her daughter for a minute, Clarke sighed turning her attention to her father taking a breath before she began explaining what had happened to Lexa in the hospital over the last few days and what her mother had told her was likely to happen once Lexa woke up.

 

* * *

 

** Flashback-Thursday 14th May 2009 **

** -Ark Memorial Park- **

_Clarke and Lexa had been sitting at a bench table sketch pads in front of them for the last hour, most of the time they’d been talking about everything but art, from their childhoods and their families to what they wanted to be once they left school. About five minutes ago they had finally got onto drawing something, Clarke had chosen a small forest looking area in the distance from where they sat, it was past the small football pitch and a small play area that was filled with swings, roundabouts, slides, rocking horses, see saws and a whole bunch of other things for children to play on. Clarke talked Lexa through some basic stuff to help her with her sketching, before turning her attention to the image they were meant to be drawing, beginning to sketch the scene in front of them, complete with the football pitch and the play area. As she finished each object she found herself drawn more to looking at the girl next to her, her eyes catching the image that Lexa was sketching, the image itself making her wonder if Lexa had really needed help sketching, Lexa’s picture was pretty damn good the images weren’t perfect but they weren’t the worst either, you could clearly make out what the brunette was drawing. Thinking about the possibility that Lexa might had just wanted to spend time with her was something that brought a smile to her face as she continued to sketch on the pad in front of her._

_About ten minutes must have passed before Clarke finished up her sketch, placing her pencil down she clenched and unclenched her hands numerous times to make sure that she wouldn’t get a cramp in a few minutes. When she looked down at the pad of the brunette next to her she smiled seeing that the small glimpse of the image she’d seen before had clearly formed into an almost perfect sketched image on the pad. Laughing softly, she looked at Lexa smiling at the brunette as she reached for the pad, placing it in front of her she gently moved her finger over the paper, before lifting Lexa’s sketch pad in the air looking at Lexa asking her;_

_“Did you really need my help? Because this says you didn’t”_

_“Well, Maybe I wasn’t as bad as I led you to believe”_

_“Ya think”_

_“Well how am I meant to find out more about you if I can’t get a moment to talk to you without Raven or Octavia butting in”_

_“You want to know more about me?”_

_“Of course,”_

****

_“Well now you know there’s not a lot to know about me”_

_“I think there is…like I knew you could draw but I didn’t know you were that good” Lexa softly smiled pushing down all her nerves and worries about what Clarke might think of her and how different they were “You’re an amazing artist”_

_“I’m not that good….”_

_“And your modest too…Trust me you’re a great artist”_

_“Thank you”_

_“Your very welcome….” As Clarke looked at her their eyes locked and for some strange reason Lexa couldn’t explain she couldn’t think of anything to say to her. Like the moment their eyes connected she couldn’t find her breath or any form of rational acting. That was until her twin sister’s words rushed through her head, she could hear Raven’s voice telling her to keep calm and just breath through it. Blinking a few times and releasing her breath she added “So what is about sketching or drawing that you like so much”_

_“What makes you think I like it…so much?”_

_“Your face when your drawing…it’s like you’re in another world, like you’re at peace and nothing can ruin the perfect image that you’re looking at…. like no matter what madness is going on around you, just concentrating on this one thing makes you feel at ease…like it’s your calm place”_

_“That’s crazy…” How did she know that? That was all Clarke could think, she’d ever told anyone that was how she felt about drawing, but here was someone that she was drawn to that knew exactly how she felt about sketching. She’d never told Octavia or anyone that and here was Lexa getting it one hundred percent correct without her having to say a word to her. Smiling brightly, she at Lexa she was unable to finish her sentence as the brunette quickly apologised_

_“I’m sorry I know that’s a little rude I….”_

_“Don’t apologise…” Clarke let out placing her hand gently on Lexa’s she continued “Nobody’s ever understood it before…I’ve tried to explain it to them but they don’t get it…. but you do…It’s just a little crazy that someone can know exactly how I feel when I’ve never said it the way I feel it to anyone…. how did you know that’s how I feel about sketching?”_

_“I don’t know…. because that’s how I feel about music I suppose…. like even when I’m surrounded by pure madness I can be content and in a different world completely just from writing down lyrics and playing or listening to music…”_

_“You write lyrics?”_

_“Yeah….” Lexa shyly responded trying to hide the embarrassment that was pushing its way to the surface of her cheeks. “Raven does as well…. we know it’s stupid and it’ll never led anywhere….”_

_“It’s not stupid Lexa….and you shouldn’t be such a defeatist…you can be anything you want to be”_

_“You think so?”_

_“Yeah, I do…” Clarke softly smiled as she looked Lexa in the eyes and continued “So I know why I paint, why do you write?”_

_“For all the reasons you sketch…mainly because I love it, it makes me feel calm and at peace in a very weird and unexplainable way…but I started because mine and Raven’s family life wasn’t the best, and we needed an escape which isn’t easy in a family that spends most of their money on alcohol, so I started writing down these feelings and emotions…then I learnt how to play instruments at school…I hid it from Raven at first because I felt stupid but then I saw she was struggling so I shared it with her….” Pausing as she looked at Clarke seeing the blonde’s attention was completely concentrated on her she blushed slightly continuing “And I’m rambling…. I’m sorry”_

_“Don’t be sorry Lexa…Its nice…seeing how passionate you are about it, it’s nice to know that I’m not the only one that loves doing something that much…Its nice knowing someone else understands…”_

_“It is”_

_Lexa smiled brightly at the blonde before taking a breath and continuing to talk. The two women became engrossed in conversation about music and art, and everything about each other, well whatever they wanted the other to know anyway. They talked for the next hour getting lost in the conversation and getting to know each other, Clarke’s hand had stayed holding onto Lexa’s for twenty minutes of their conversation until Clarke pointed something out in the park and placed her hand back on the table near her and Lexa’s sketch pads, she was slightly worried by the fact that she missed the contact between her and Lexa. It wasn’t something she’d ever felt before with anyone a friend or more. And if she was honest she would have liked it if it wasn’t for the fact that it completely scared her considering she didn’t really know Lexa. Once they realised the time, they agreed that they should both head home before Clarke’s parents and Lexa’s dad and Aunt started calling and asking them where they were. They walked from the Memorial park talking as Lexa carried their sketch pads and pencils after she’d all but forced Clarke to let her. As they walked towards their respective cars their conversation continued to flow naturally as they walked down the final path that led to the street they needed to walk down to get back to Arkadia High, Clarke was so lost in her conversation with Lexa that she didn’t see a baseball come flying in her direction, Lexa on the other hand noticed the ball coming flying full speed towards Clarke, without a second thought Lexa grabbed Clarke dropping the sketch pads and pencils from her hand and turning herself and Clarke until her back was facing the direction the ball was coming. Before she had a chance to explain what was going on to Clarke the baseball flew into her back, hitting the back of her right shoulder smashing hard into the muscle that covered her shoulder the force of the hit making her let out a grunt of pain as she leant forward moving her body forward with the force of the hit. Clarke worryingly looked down at the brunette not seeing the embarrassment on Lexa’s face as she placed her hand in front of herself to stop her completely falling to the ground. Pushing down the sharp pain she was feeling rushing through her shoulder muscles, Lexa gritted her teeth and turned looking for the baseball that had done the damage to her shoulder, seeing it near her foot she picked it up turning and seeing a teenage boy who she recognised as one of the boys from their school, she didn’t know how he was but she knew it went to their school, she also noticed the slightly scared look on the boy’s face she wasn’t sure why he was scared of her but he looked it, lifting her hand in the air signalling to him she was okay and he didn’t need to worry she held the baseball in her other hand throwing it over to the boy in question watching as he caught the ball turning and walking to his friends shaking his hand slightly the sight of that making Lexa smirk slightly. She wasn’t able to smirk long as Clarke took hold of her hand turning her around to face her;_

_“Are you okay Lexa?”_

_“I’m fine Clarke, it’s nothing……most likely just a muscle bruise”_

_“You don’t know that Lexa….” Clarke let out pulling on Lexa’s hand forcing the brunette to move with her over to a patch of grass near a tree not far from where they were standing when Lexa got hit by the baseball. Without thinking about anything but Lexa’s safety, Clarke turned Lexa around pulling her t-shirt down gently but forcefully, her eyes instantly falling on a baseball sized dark red mark just below Lexa’s right shoulder, again without thinking she gently placed her fingers on the skin and muscle that the red mark covered. She continued examining the mark for a few minutes pressing against the muscle like her mother had taught her. Finishing feeling the muscle for any tears or other damage to the muscle that could have been caused by the force of the baseball smashing into her. Placing Lexa’s shirt back how it had been she turned the brunette around so they were facing each other again, seeing the amusement on Lexa’s face she instantly felt embarrassed at what she’d just done “Oh my god, I’m so sorry”_

_“It’s ok Clarke….”_

_“It’s not, I’m sorry it’s just habit…”_

_“Honestly Clarke its fine…. it’s nice that you care enough to check me out…. I mean over…”_

_“Over…”_

_“Right…”_

_Clarke watched as Lexa moved over to where their sketch pads and pencils had fallen on the pathway, Clarke found herself leaning against the tree that was now behind her, watching as Lexa picked up the sketch pads, there was something about the brunette that Clarke just couldn’t get out of her mind, something that she’d been trying to avoid over the last few months they’d known each other, it was a crush, surely it was just a crush is what she’d think to herself, and sooner or later a crush would fade away, and now she was getting to know Lexa, now they’d held hands and talked about their personal lives, now she knew more about the brunette she didn’t think she was going to get over this crush. But what was she meant to do, the way Lexa looked at her made her debate what she should do, that look Lexa gave her didn’t make her feel like they were friends, it made her breath hitch and her hands clammy, it made her heart race a little more than it perhaps should. As she was trying to decide what to do Lexa walked back over to her smiling at the faraway look in Clarke’s eyes as she asked if the blonde was ok. As the words broke her thoughts Clarke decided to ask something she’d been wondering since lunch time;_

_“Why did you ask me to hang out today Lexa?”_

_“Well how else was I going to get to know you better without everyone else around?”_

_“But why would you want to get to know me better?”_

_“I needed to find out if Octavia was telling me the truth, and the only way to know was to get to know you a lot better” Lexa honestly responded moving a step closer to Clarke, deciding that she needed to just be honest and a little more forward with Clarke than she had been over the last few months._

_“What did Octavia tell you?”_

_“She told me that you liked me”_

_“I do like you”_

_“As more than a friend” Lexa watched the blondes face flush slightly “If you don’t its ok…it just came up because I told her that I like you….as more than a friend…”_

_“You do?”_

_“I do….as a LOT more than a friend…I just need to know if it’s one sided…”_

_“It is…. TRUE…what Octavia told you” Clarke quickly clarified her hands shooting into the air and grabbing Lexa’s so the brunette couldn’t go anywhere. Not that it looked like she was, as Clarke looked at Lexa’s face their eyes connected and she nervously asked “What does that mean? Do you want to talk over what it means?”_

_“Not right now….I think right now I’d rather just do this…” Lexa started moving closer to Clarke until their chests were almost completely pressed together, removing her hands from Clarke’s she placed them on Clarke’s cheeks smiling down at the blonde slowly closing the gap between them both she looked in Clarke’s eyes getting lost in the blue eyes that looked back at her, before she had a chance to move closer Clarke closed the gap between them connecting their lips together, instantly Lexa kissed the blonde back pushing against her slightly the both of them leaning into each other, Clarke’s back resting against the tree behind them holding them up as they got lost in each other’s lips for the first of what they both hoped would be many times._

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did we all think? I wasn’t sure about where to put the last flashback part of the chapter, it was going to be after the Raven and Oscar stuff in Lexa’s Hospital room but I wasn’t sure, so I just put it at the end lol, let me know if you all think it should be moved….Anyways, not a massive amount in there but we learnt how Clexa had their first kiss, along with Clarke and the twins dealing with Lexa being in hospital with the help of Raven and Octavia…and Mama and Papa Griffin of course 


	32. Forever and Eternity Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLLLOOOOO EVERYONE, Firstly I wanna say thank you to everyone that reads this story, I know it’s been a while and my posting updates has been all over the place and for that I apologise, but I’m making up for it by giving you another part of Chapter Thirty, I was going to end it at Chapter Thirty part two but I’ve decided to give you all another chapter as way of an apology, and hopefully they’ll be up within days of each other, I am thinking about writing a follow up with more flashbacks and backstories for this story as well as Destiny Has No Path, but will let you all know what I decide, and of course feel free to give me your input and thoughts if you like…Secondly, Thank you to everyone that took the time out to leave a comment, give kudos or bookmark this story, I love hearing from you all and appreciate you all taking the time to do so, Thirdly, As always I'm happy to hear feedback from people, from spotting a mistake to perhaps the wrong word being placed in a sentence, I 'm more than happy to hear from you, all I ask is your polite and remember that I am a human being with feelings, theres no need for rudeness or anything like that so please bare that in mind...Thank you...Anyways I'll leave you all to it and I hope you enjoy this chapter...

** Chapter Thirty-Forever and Eternity Part One **

Raven, Clarke, the twins and Octavia were all sat in Lexa’s hospital room. Clarke had entered the room an hour ago, as soon as she entered the room Olivia held onto her hand a little tighter, Clarke knew that Olivia was more than likely scared of all the machines so she stepped in front of her daughter kneeling down and taking her daughters’ hands softly talking to her and telling her what each machine was and what it did, unbeknown to her, just as Raven had done with Oscar when he got scared entering the room. As she explained the machines to Olivia she noticed her daughter’s face soften and the fear slowly disappear. Once she’d explained everything to Olivia she watched as her daughter looked at her Mama’s face for a minute studying it almost like she was trying to make sure it was actually her Mama in the bed. Once Olivia turned back to her cuddling into her shoulder, a small soft smile on her face, Clarke looked around the room seeing there was an extra chair that she knew wasn’t there before in the corner. Guessing one of the nurses must have brought it into the room seeing Lexa had more visitors than normal, Clarke grabbed the chair with her free hand half lifting and half dragging it to the opposite side of the bed to Raven, Octavia and Oscar. Once the chair was in place she sat down letting Olivia continue to cuddle into her chest and shoulder knowing she was probably still a little scared and overwhelmed.

 

They had all been sat in silence for the last thirty minutes, the adults didn’t say a word wanting to give the twins time to process their Mama lying in front of them. They knew it wouldn’t be that easy for the twins but they also knew that the twins were very smart for their age and they hoped that everything that they’d told the 4 year olds would help them to process what they were now seeing. Clarke wondered to herself how long the twins would believe their Mama was sick for, the bruising and stab wounds to Lexa’s stomach were covered but the bruising and small cuts to her face were clear once you got close. Though neither of the twins were close enough to see the bruising and cuts right now, at some point when they got comfortable enough they’d want to hug their Mama and that would mean having to explain why they couldn’t, and no matter how hard she thought about it she couldn’t think of anything that the twins would understand. How could she explain that for them, she just couldn’t. She was shook out of her thoughts when her son’s voice filled the room;

 

“Hi Mommy?” Oscar sweetly let out waving at his Mommy almost as if he’d only just seen her in the room. The smile on his face so innocent and pure that it made her heart want to burst.

 

“Hi baby boy” Clarke watched as Oscar looked in her direction but not directly at her, looking down she could see Olivia was looking at her twin brother, the two of them exchanging a look that seemed to be more than a look, almost like they were having a conversation just through looking at each other. Not sure what the look was about she gently ran her hand through her daughter’s hair gaining her attention before she looked at them both and softly spoke “What’s wrong babies? ....you know that you can ask me and Auntie Rae and Tavi anything you want….if somethings upsetting you both or worrying you, you can ask us and we won’t get mad or angry”

 

“Or upset?” Oscar cautiously asked looking from his twin sister to his Mommy then to his Aunties

 

“Or upset baby boy…I promise…. In fact, I Mommy Promise” Clarke soothingly and softly responded smiling at her son and daughter. Hoping they would take her words to heart and talk to her.

 

“Why….” Oscar stopped himself speaking looking at Olivia for a second, when Olivia gave him an encouraging nod and smile he continued “Why does Mama have bruises?”

 

“What bruises?”

 

“On Mama’s face, she has bruises…. did you and Mama fight?”

 

“No of course not, me and Mama don’t fight like that…”

 

“Then why does Mama have bruises Mommy….”

 

“Well Mama is sick...and….” Clarke paused for a second, unsure of what she was meant to say, or how she was meant to explain the bruises, she’d hoped that the twins wouldn’t notice the bruises at all. But now she had no choice but to explain it to them. “Ok, so Mama was working on her music and she felt sick, her stomach started to heart and before she could call Mommy or Auntie Rae for help she fell over…and when she fell over she hit her face on the floor….and because she fell so far to the floor it bruised her face…”

 

“Like when I fell from the slide Mommy?” Olivia softly asked looking up at her Mommy keeping her attention on her Mommy awaiting her response to her question.

 

“Exactly like that baby…if you’d have fallen from something that was smaller you wouldn’t have hurt your chin that bad….BUT because you fell from that high your chin got hurt….”

 

“Does Mama have special cream for her face? ….because I can share mine Mommy I don’t mind…”

 

“That’s ok Princess…Grandma and the nurses all have special medicine and creams that they give Mama every few hours, it’s not the same cream that you have though because Mama has a bad stomach as well…”

 

“Does Mama’s stomach need cream as well Mommy?”

 

“It does baby…so it’s really really really important that when you hug Mama you’re really gently and careful with her stomach because it could hurt Mama and nobody wants that do they?” Both the twins shook their heads at their Mommy “Good…is there anything else you both wanna ask me?” The twins looked at each other before smiling and shaking their heads softly at their Mommy “Ok, but if you want to know something then promise me that you’ll ask me or Auntie Rae or Auntie Tavi, you guys promise?”

 

“We promise Mommy” The twins said in unison, making the three adults in the room smile brightly. Clarke placed a small kiss on her daughter’s head, as Raven placed a gentle kiss on her nephew’s cheek making him giggle softly and turn to face her. Clarke watched on as her son placed his hands on his Auntie Rae’s cheeks, intently looking at her for a few minutes before he softly spoke;

 

“Are you ok Auntie Rae?”

 

“I’m okay thanks Oz…. Why do you ask?”

 

“Because Mama is your twin sister, just like Livy is mine….and I love Livy loads and loads and lots…and if she was in hospital I’d be really sad because I loves her and I don’t want her to be hurt…. And you love Mama lots and loads just like I love Livy…and I don’t want you to be sad Auntie Rae…”

 

Raven looked to Clarke and Octavia taken aback by her nephew’s pure sweetness, she couldn’t help but smile at him. He was so innocent and caring for such a young boy, it reminded her of Lexa when they were younger, Lexa was always looking after her and making sure that she was ok before she took care of herself. It made her smile uncontrollably knowing that the little boy was like his Mama in that way even though he was probably scared about everything he’d been told. Keeping the smile on her face she softly responded to her nephew “I’m not sad…. not anymore, because I have you here to cuddle me and remind me everything will be okay…I am worried about your Mama but that’s because she’s my twin…”

 

“But what about when we leave, will you be sad then?”

 

“No, I won’t be…because I have your Mommy and I have Auntie Tavi to keep me smiling…and if I get really sad I will call you…”

 

“Do you promise Auntie Rae?”

 

“I promise…. now give me loads of cuddles…”

 

Oscar let out a loud giggle as he leant forward wrapping his arms around Raven as she leant forward wrapping her arms tightly around him. Once her arms were wrapped around Oscar she squeezed him tighter and softly shook him from side to side making his giggle turn into a full-on laugh, he wriggled on Raven’s lap until he ended up sliding down her legs once he was free her ran to Octavia jumping onto her lap and hugging her tightly as he continued to giggle resting his head on her shoulder as he looked at his Auntie Rae. Oscar stayed like he was, watching as his Auntie Rae smiled softly and laughed at him before turning her attention to Lexa. There was silence in the room for about five minutes before Olivia’s small voice filled the room;

 

“Mommy…can you tell us stories about Mama?”

 

Looking down at her daughter smiling down at her, moving both her hands to Olivia’s loose hair running her hands through both sides of Olivia’s hair her face intently studying her daughter’s face. She was trying to see if Olivia was scared or worried, but as she looked at Olivia she couldn’t see any of those things. Before she had a chance to question what she’d seen on her daughter’s face Oscar’s voice filled up the room.

 

“YEAH MOMMY…” He shouted out from his place with his Auntie Octavia making Raven and Octavia laugh softly at the excitement he was showing. “Tell us stories Mommy” He added his eyes staying on his Mommy waiting for her to respond, his look making Clarke smile before taking a small breath and asking;

 

“You both wanna hear stories about Mama?” The twins both nodded their heads at their Mommy. “What kind of stories do you want to hear? …Do you want stories of Mama when she was younger or before you were born….or after you were born?”

 

“ALL” The twins answered at the same time.

 

“You wanna hear all the Mama stories I know?” The twins nodded their heads at their Mommy “Mmm ok, but how about because I have so many Mama stories you both pick what kind of story you want to hear, then I’ll tell you and we can keep going until I run out of stories to tell…how does that sound?”

 

“Good” They both answered, Olivia turned around looking at her brother and smiling “You go first” They both said at the same time, laughing softly at the fact they’d spoken at the same time.

 

“Oscar my prince…why don’t you go first because you’re technically the oldest” Clarke softly said smiling at her daughter as she leant continued to intently watch her.

 

“Ok Mommy…. I wanna know about Mama and the Music…because I love the music Mommy”

 

“What about the music do you want to know my Prince?”

 

“Everything Mommy”

 

“That’s not really specific baby”

 

“What’s specific Mommy?”

 

“It means clear…like when you talk about a certain thing your being specific…so in this case it would be like a certain time like if you asked about the first time Mama kissed me…that’s specific because it’s about something and its clear and certain…” Clarke explained, trying not to get too technical with her four-year-old son. She had to admit this was the worst part of parenting, trying to explain something in a way that her children could understand.

 

“Ok…. does that mean I have to pick something else?”

 

“No baby, it just means you have to tell me what about Mama’s music you want to hear first”

 

“Mmmm…When did you hear Mama sing first Mommy?”

 

“When was the first time I heard Mama sing?”

 

“Yeah” Oscar excitedly responded his smile filling his face as he clapped a few times looking at his Mommy.

 

“Ok then…well the first time I heard Mama sing was when we were in High School, me and Aunt Tavi were high school and we were in our music lesson ….” Clarke began telling her children the story smiling as she got lost in the memory.

 

* * *

**_**_Classroom Layout: Stage at the front -where the teacher stands and students perform. There’s a small space in front of the stage -about 5 feet. After that space the chairs (With the small half/ side desk things) are in six rows across, each row has about ten maybe twelve chairs going all the way to the back of the room._**_ **

**_Friday 5 th June 2009-Music Block_ **

_Clarke and Octavia were walked into their music room, as usual Raven and Lexa were sat at the back of the room talking to each other neither woman would acknowledge anyone but each other and the teacher during Music. For Clarke being ignored by Lexa had become something she was used too over the last month, since they kissed nearly a month ago, Lexa had barely said a word to her, she’d smile brightly at her and look unhappy when Clarke would talk to Roan or anyone else that made the blonde smile but she still didn’t say a word to her about the kiss, anything they spoke about was either school related or about something completely unrelated to their kiss. Octavia kept telling her that Lexa really liked her but no matter what her best friend told her, Lexa’s actions didn’t match up with her best friend’s words. Walking through the classroom and sitting down in her normal seat as Octavia went to say hi to Raven as she always, once all her books were on the table Clarke glanced back at Lexa surprised to see the brunette was looking in her direction, she couldn’t help but smile under Lexa’s gaze, her eyebrows creased as the brunette smiled and nodded towards her. When Lexa nodded in her direction again she looked in front of her seeing her best friends hand moving from in front of her, where now a white envelope with ‘_ ** _Clarke’_** _clearly written on it sat on the desk. Looking at her best friend all she received was a shoulder shrug as Octavia raised her arms signalling she wasn’t involved, even though Clarke knew she was clearly involved the blonde ignored her best friend turning back to Lexa, holding the letter up she pointed from the letter to herself then to Lexa. The brunette nodded her head smiling biting her lip from what was clearly nerves, Clarke pointed to the floor mouthing ‘now’ asking Lexa if she wanted her to open it now. Lexa nodded her head softly. Smiling Clarke turned back to face the front of the room opening the letter as their teacher walked into the classroom, ignoring Mr Patrick she turned her attention to the letter beginning to read the neatly written words on the paper;_

_Clarke,_

_Where do I start, well I might as well start with the thing we both know for sure, and that is that I am a complete idiot, and that over the last few months I’ve proved that, I can’t even explain how angry and annoyed I am at myself for not being able to say this to you face to face. But I can’t help it, everytime I see you I get these butterflies in my stomach and it’s like my mouth drops into my stomach and I can’t seem to formulate the words I need to tell you how much I really really really really REALLY want you to be my girlfriend. You probably thinking this is kind of lame and your right, but over the last few weeks I’ve been so happy…. beyond happy that we kissed that I somehow forgot to tell you how happy I was about it. I know it doesn’t take back the weeks of silence and possibly doubt that you’ve gone through but I want to make it upto you, I know it’s hard to believe but sometimes saying things for me is a lot harder than writing them, I guess it’s the music writer in me. And with you, I want to say so much but I can’t not because I don’t want to but because I get so lost in your eyes and how great of a person you are that I forget what I want to say and by time I remember your gone or we’re surrounded by our friends. I know that an apology doesn’t make up for anything but at the moment this is all I have…So I’M SORRY so sorry I don’t think I can write it enough. And I’m hoping that you’ll give me a chance to earn you back…not that you’re a piece of property or anything…what I mean is I want to earn the right to hold your hand and hug you and kiss you, I want to earn the right to one day call you my girlfriend…And I want to start now…we’ll more specifically this evening I’ve got a whole date planned, and if you’re willing to give me a chance I’d love to prove that I’m worthy of your time…I respect if you I screwed up too bad, and if I did I can only apologise and let you know I’ll regret it for the rest of my life…_

_Please put me out of my misery as I am one hundred percent sure I am watching you right now waiting for a response (No pressure I promise)._

_Lexa_

_Clarke smiled brightly at the brunette’s words, nobody had ever written her a letter like that before, turning back to look at Lexa she smiled as she saw the brunette was indeed watching her waiting for a response. And she wasn’t the only one, Raven’s eyes were clearly on her, turning to her right she noticed Octavia’s attention was on her as well, shaking her head she turned back to Lexa, biting her lip she thought about it for a second, she knew that the last few weeks were hell for her but the way the brunette made her feel just by being in the same room wasn’t something she had experienced before and not talking to her wasn’t really the worst crime in the world. Thinking to herself for a second more she decided to follow her heart, looking Lexa in the eyes she nodded her head softly. When mouth a ‘really?’ her way she nodded her head again, watching in amusement as the brunette hit the air in victory letting out a massive ‘YES’ causing the teacher’s attention to her._

_“Is there something you’d like to share with all of us Miss Reyes-Woods?”_

_“No sir…sorry I just remembered something really great is happening later”_

_“Well Later isn’t now is it…so please refrain from any outbursts…”_

_“Sure thing, Sir”_

_“So today as previously discussed, you will all be performing your given songs, your all singing Britney Spears songs, some of you are singing the same song this we all know, now the aim isn’t to get the song perfect or to ‘nail it’ as you all like to say…The aim is to perform the song with the amount of emotion you think the artist put into the song when they wrote it. Now there is no such thing as a bad interpretation in this case I want you all to give one hundred percent, it will be noticed I promise…so who wants to go first?” Mr Patrick asked, the whole class began looking at each other, nobody wanted to be the first person to take the stage because it would either be really bad or really good. After a minute of silence Mr Patrick spoke “Ok then, let’s do this at random then…Phillip why don’t you start us off” Mr Patrick firmly said to a young boy at the front of the classroom. The boy argued with him at first quickly stopping when he realised the Mr Patrick wasn’t going to take no for an answer._

_The whole class listened intently as Phillip took the stage and began singing his assigned Britney Spears song, everyone could tell that he didn’t really understand the song or in fact why they were doing this task. As he finished they all clapped and cheered for him clearly showing their support for their classroom. Mr Patrick held his hands in the air signalling for everyone to quiet down, which they all did. As Mr Patrick looked around the room Lexa looked to her left to her twin sister, both of them exchanging a funny look remembering the conversation they had early about performing and not wanting to go first or last, they also had a conversation about whether or not they would be picked before Octavia and Clarke. Of course, as always with them that conversation turned serious when Lexa realised that Raven was nervous about performing more because she’d never sung in front of Octavia and she didn’t want to make a fool of herself in front of her girlfriend. As they were looking at each other Mr Patrick’s voice interrupted them;_

_“MISS REYES-WOODS…. Is there something I need to be aware of?”_

_“No sir”_

_“Then why are you determined to interrupt my class…”_

_“I’m not…I wasn’t even talking”_

_“You know I am disappointed, I would have thought that coming from a military school and family you would have more control over your vocal outbursts…but instead lesson after lesson you come into my classroom and interrupt my lessons…. you seem to have an ounce of respect or self-control what so ever…”_

_“DON’T TALK TO MY SISTER LIKE THAT” Raven defensively shouted at the teacher standing up at the same time, she didn’t care who she was shouting at nobody spoke to her sister like that_

_“Rae, its ok…calm down” Lexa responded standing up and walking around and in front of Raven taking her attention away from Mr Patrick and forcing her to look at her “It’s fine Rae”_

_“No, it isn’t Lex…. he can’t talk to you like that, you didn’t do anything wrong…he’s meant to be a teacher not a bully…”_

_Placing her hands on her sister’s cheeks she forced her to look into her eyes “Look at me” She knew this wasn’t about Mr Patrick at all, Raven never liked shouting or people being nasty to each other, especially to her, and she could never stand up to their mother, not because she didn’t want to but because she wasn’t old enough. She knew that Raven regretted not standing up for her when they were younger and now she would kick into defence mode the first chance she got. As Raven looked into Lexa’s eyes she calmed down her body language showing just that. Lexa pulled her twin into a hug gently kissing her cheek as she did so. Their moment was ruined when Mr Patricks voice filled the room;_

_“Miss Reyes-Woods…. that’s Raven I’m referring to…seeing as you feel so strongly about my treatment of your sister, perhaps you can stop acting like a school girl and act like a teenage girl and take the stage and take her place as the second person to perform today…Thank you…”_

_Lexa pulled out of the hug softly whispering to her sister “You don’t have to perform Rae, if don’t want to he can’t make you…” Raven didn’t say a word to her twin she just shook her head, took a deep breath in and began walking towards the stage walking up onto it, not speaking or looking at Mr Patrick or even Octavia. Grabbing a stool, she placed it in the middle of the stage and sat on it facing the back of the stage, not wanting to look at anyone whilst she performed. Without waiting for her to give him confirmation that she was ready to start signing, the music began to play and as the first verse began Raven remained silent, amusing everyone in the room, none of them could see what Lexa could see, she could see Raven’s hands were on her lap and she knew that her sisters fist were clenched in anger, she knew that Raven was angry and trying to control herself, Mr Patrick wasn’t being far on her and they all knew why but because they knew didn’t make it any easier for Raven to control her anger. Mr Patrick restarted the music four more times getting the same reaction every single time from Raven, stopping the music he cleared his throat speaking loudly;_

_“Miss Reyes-Woods, this is your final chance….if you do not perform the song this time I will fail you for this part of the module…” Without any further word, and ignoring the looks of unapproval he was getting from the other students in the class he pressed play again;_

_The whole time Mr Patrick had been speaking Lexa had watched on knowing what her sister was like she decided that she wasn’t going to sit by and watch Raven get failed by Mr Patrick because he had an issue with Raven. This wasn’t fair on her sister and right now she wanted to punch Mr Patrick but that wouldn’t help anyone. But more than anything she knew how much Raven wanted to pass this class. She decided that if Raven was going to be failed then so was she. She didn’t care, she wasn’t going to let this teacher get away with bullying her baby sister, even if Raven was only two minutes younger than her she was still the eldest of the two and she had to look after Raven. And as the music began playing her mind was made up completely._

_Leaning forward in her chair Lexa opened her mouth keeping her eyes on her twin sister, she began singing the first verse knowing fully that Raven wouldn’t._

**_I'm Not A Girl, Not Yet A Woman_ **

_Lexa:_

_I used to think_

**_-As Lexa’s voice fills the room Raven turns to look her sister, theirs eyes meeting-_ **

_I had the answers to everything,_

_But now I know_

_Life doesn't always go my way, yeah..._

_Feels like I'm caught in the middle_

_That's when I realize..._

**_-Raven turns on her chair facing her sister, a small smile spreading across her face. Keeping her eyes on her twin sister she swallowed back before beginning to sing knowing her sister was showing her support. Knowing that she could do anything with Lexa’s support-_ **

_Lexa & Raven:_

_-Chorus-_

_I'm not a girl,_

_Not yet a woman._

_All I need is time,_

_A moment that is mine,_

_While I'm in between._

_[Verse 2]_

_Raven:_

_I'm not a girl,_

_There is no need to protect me._

_It's time that I_

_Learn to face up to this on my own._

_I've seen so much more than you know now,_

_So, don't tell me to shut my eyes._

_[Chorus]_

_Raven:_

_I'm not a girl,_

_But if you look at me closely,_

_You will see it in my eyes._

_This girl will always find_

_Her way._

_Raven: I'm not a girl_

_Lexa: (I'm not a girl don't tell me what to believe)._

_Raven: Not Yet a woman_

_Lexa: (I'm just trying to find the woman in me, yeah)._

_Raven: All I need is time_

_Lexa:(All I need),_

_Raven: A moment that is mine_

_Lexa: (That is mine),_

_Raven: While I'm in between._

_Both:_

_I'm not a girl_

_Not yet a woman (not now)_

_All I need is time (All I need),_

_A moment that is mine,_

_While I'm in between._

_I'm not a girl,_

_Not yet a woman._

 

_As the song came to a finish, both of the Reyes-Woods Twins smiled brightly hearing the applause from their classmates, Raven didn’t wait for Mr Patrick to say a word. She stood up from the stool running down the stairs and to her sister, within seconds she crashed into her twin sister, who had stood knowing what Raven was likely to do, hugging Lexa tightly Raven held on like their lives depended on it. Softly whispering “Thank you” into her sister’s ear as she held on. Before Lexa had a chance to respond Mr Patricks voice filled the room;_

_“I’m sorry Raven…. Alexa…. but unfortunately, this is a solo project, therefore you are both being failed for not competing this task as asked…”_

_“WHAT…THAT’S RUBBISH…” Octavia’s voice filled the classroom as she stood up the anger clear on her face as she looked at Mr Patrick who was clearly shocked at her outburst. Raven and Lexa had already broken apart and were now both looking at Octavia in shock at her outburst._

_“Miss Blake, please refrain from shouting out in class”_

_“NO….”_

_“Excuse me?”_

_“You heard me…. this is rubbish, you didn’t say anything about us pairing up and getting someone to help out with our performance….and you didn’t say this was a solo performance either, you said that the performance had to be about the artist’s emotions when they were singing and that you wanted to see that emotion in the performance…that’s exactly what they just did, they put emotion into the performance what more do you want…”_

_Seeing her best friend was getting a little too angry Clarke stood up placing a gentle hand on Octavia’s left arm “O, calm down…” She said knowing it wouldn’t work, Octavia was worked up and that was never something that was easy to resolve._

_“No Clarke…I won’t calm down…he can’t do that to them it isn’t fair…and nobody in here thinks it is…right?” The whole class let out a ‘RIGHT’ as they looked at Octavia, all of them thinking exactly what she was thinking but not wanting to get failed for speaking up. “I’m not going to sit here and let him treat my girlfriend like that…. it’s not okay and it’s not fair…. his anger has nothing to do with her…”_

_“MISS BLAKE…. I WILL NOT WARN YOU AGAIN…”_

_Before Octavia could speak Raven was next to her turning her so they were face to face “O, babe calm down….” Again, before Octavia could say anything Raven continued “I know your standing up for me but I don’t want you to get failed as well…”_

_“I don’t care about that Rae…I care about you…”_

_“I know you do baby….” Raven smiled brightly wrapping her arms around Octavia and hugging her, smiling when Octavia slumped herself into the hug in defeat. Pulling out of the hug, Raven quickly sat down in Octavia’s chair pulling her girlfriend onto her lap not giving her a chance to argue any further, as soon as Octavia looked down at her she captured her girlfriends lip with her own. Breaking the kiss, she softly placed kisses on Octavia’s cheek and down her jaw, the kisses instantly made her girlfriends anger disappear, as her hands moved quickly to Raven’s shoulders resting on them as she leant her head forward resting it on Raven’s shoulder as she ignored their idiotic teacher’s words._

_The rest of the lesson quickly passed by, every few minutes Clarke would find herself looking over at Lexa on occasion the brunette would be looking at her as well. Whenever that would happen Clarke would smile even wider than she already was. There was something about the brunette that called to her, something she wasn’t at all upset or angry about. The rest of the day went on as normal, they whole group had lunch together, most of the time Octavia and Raven were making out, it wasn’t unusual for them to make out but Clarke noticed that Raven was talking and whispering to Octavia a lot, and she knew what her best friend was like, once she was angry it was hard to calm her down completely, she guessed that Raven was still trying to keep Octavia calm and for her the easiest way was to keep kissing the lighter brunette. Luckily for her she had everyone else to talk to, except Lexa, she wasn’t sure where Raven’s twin sister had gotten to but she was sure she’d find out soon enough._

_After lunch finished, she went to her normal classes, luckily most of her classes were with Octavia which allowed her to keep an eye on her best friend even more than normal. Their classes came and went by, as each class went by she found herself thinking more and more about Lexa and their date later that day, she wasn’t even sure what time Lexa wanted to pick her up, all she knew was that she couldn’t wait to spend time with the brunette, time alone without their friends interrupting them or making noises and funny sounds everytime she spoke. As the bell for the end of school rang through the halls she packed up her things placing them all into her backpack, walking out of the classroom with Octavia, seeing the brunette smiling brightly at her phone, sneaking a peak at what Octavia was looking at she saw her best friend was texting Raven, not looking at the messages themselves for fear of reading something she didn’t want to. Seeing best friend texting Raven only made her wonder more about her date with Lexa, so once she reached her car she pulled her phone out texting the brunette and asking her what time she needed to be ready for their date;_

**_Clarke: What time do I need to get beautiful by?_ **

_Within a thirty seconds Lexa had responded to her message:_

**_Lexa: About 7pm, for the record you don’t need to get beautiful…you already are_ **

_Clarke couldn’t help but smile at the response, Lexa was write it was easier for her to write stuff out than saying it, the more she looked at the message the more she smiled until Octavia hit her on the arm telling her to unlock the car so she could drive them home. Clarke shook her head at her friend placing the phone in her pocket forgetting to respond to the brunette on the other end of the phone. Turning her attention to driving her best friend home and getting herself ready for her date with Lexa._

* * *

 

 

** Back in Lexa’s Hospital Room **

Clarke finished telling the story to the twins, seeing the smiles on their faces she couldn’t help but smile herself, she remembered that day so clearly, mainly because she always loved how Lexa began singing and because she remembered why her wife started singing, she always admired how much Lexa supported and looked out for her sister no matter where there were or what they were doing Lexa was always there for Raven. She knew it wasn’t one sided either, she knew that Raven was there for Lexa in all the ways her twin was there for her. She couldn’t wait to tell the twins about the first date her and Lexa had and all the fun that they had, but right now it was best that she let the twins pick the stories, it seemed to work in making them smile and feel comfortable in the hospital room. Olivia was now laying against her chest her small arms resting against her Mommy’s chest, Oscar was still sat on Octavia’s lap but now his right side was leaning against her chest as he looked over at his Mommy clearly listening to every word that she said. Smiling at her son she saw him turn his attention to his Mama giggling before he turned to his Auntie Rae and smiled, then turning his attention back to her and Olivia;

 

“You pick now Livy…”

 

Clarke looked down at her daughter, who was still resting against her chest, gently stroking her daughter’s hair the action caused Olivia to look up at her Mommy, her right hand resting on Clarke’s left shoulder playing with her hair. After a few seconds, Olivia softly asked “What is a date Mommy?”

 

“A date?”

 

“Yeah, you said Mama asked you for a date…. what is it?”

 

“Oh…. A date is when two adults go out together, sometimes it’s to a restaurant to eat and sometimes it’s to see a movie, it can be anywhere doing anything as long as the two people are together…and most dates are romantic”

 

“Romantic? …. like you and Mama…and Auntie Rae and Octavia…. oh, and Like Grandma and Grandpa?”

 

“Yeah exactly like that….it two people who like each other a lot…but more than friends…sometimes they end up married and other’s they don’t…it all depends on the people, and it can be between a man and a woman or between two men, or two women...”

 

“I understand now Mommy”

 

“You do?” Olivia nodded her head at her Mommy, smiling brightly, a smile Clarke hadn’t seen on her daughter’s face since Lexa moved back home. “Good, so have you decided what story you want me to tell you?”

 

“I don’t want a story Mommy”

 

“Why not?”

 

“I want Mama to tell me stories”

 

Clarke felt a pang of sadness rise inside her at her daughter’s words, but as she looked at Olivia she couldn’t see sadness on her daughter’s face, she couldn’t pin the look, it was like a whole bunch of different expressions rolled into one. She decided to reaffirm what the twins had been told earlier “Mama’s asleep right now so she can’t princess”

 

“I know that Mommy, but I wanna wait until Mama wakes up…. because I like when Mama tells stories”

 

“Okay princess, are you sure though?”

 

“I really sure Mommy” Olivia confidently responded smiling up at her Mommy, turning around on her Mommy’s lap she looked over at her brother sitting on their Auntie Octavia’s lap, smiling she looked to her Auntie Raven suddenly turning back to her Mommy and whispering “Can I go sit with Auntie Rae?”

 

“Of Course, you can Princess”

 

A small giggle escaped Olivia’s mouth as she hugged her Mommy “Thank you Mommy” She whispered before turning around and shuffling down her Mommy’s legs and onto the floor, once her feet hit the floor Olivia turned running around the end of her Mama’s hospital bed and past her Auntie Tavi and her brother until she was in front of her Auntie Rae, smiling at her Auntie she climbed onto her lap, half lifted by Raven once she realised what her niece was doing. Once she was securely on her Auntie Rae’s lap Olivia turned to face Raven a little better, “Hi Auntie Rae”

 

“Hey Livy Liv…Are you ok?”

 

“Uh huh, I just wanted to sit with you”

 

“Really? Why’s that?”

 

“Because your Awesome” Olivia laughed out giggling a little, the same giggle that reminded Raven of Lexa’s when they were younger “And I wanted to sit close to Mama…. for when she wakes up”

 

“Good idea…. between me and you, that’s exactly why I sat her”

 

“That’s because your smart, like Mama and Mommy are” Olivia smiled at her Auntie Rae, turning herself so she was facing her Mama’s sleeping form. Looking at her Mama she smiled resting her back against her Auntie Rae’s chest smiling as her Auntie’s arms wrapped around her, just like her Mama always did. “Can we sing a song to Mama, Auntie Rae?”

 

“Of course, we can, what song would you like us to sing?”

 

“I don’t know…what are Mama’s most favourite songs?”

 

“Mama had loads of favourite songs, she has loads of them, I can sing one Mama sang to you both if you tell me what it is?”

 

Olivia instantly turned around on her Auntie Rae’s lap so they were face to face, Raven’s arms still wrapped around her niece making sure she didn’t fall backwards. “No, those are Mama’s songs you can’t sing them…only Mama can...Mama sings them when we’re sick”

 

“Ok…. what about I sing you a song Mama used to sing to me?”

 

“Why did Mama sing to you?”

 

“Well when we were younger our Mama wasn’t really well, she would drink alcohol and do really bad things, like shouting at us and being mean, and sometimes I’d get really scared and start crying so Lexa would sing the same song to me everytime to help calm me down…”

 

“What song did she sing?”

 

“It’s a song called Time after Time, but some people think it’s a sad song”

 

“How sad?”

 

“It makes some people cry…. I won’t sing though in case it upsets you”

 

“No Auntie Rae I want you to sing it…. please”

 

“But what if it upsets you?”

 

“I can sit with Mama…. I don’t get sad when Mama and Mommy hold my hand”

 

“I’m not sure Livy”

 

“Please Auntie Rae, I really want to hear the song….” Looking around to her Mommy she gave her a puppy dog like look as she softly added “Please Mommy I won’t be sad I promise”

 

Clarke looked at Olivia she knew her daughter could be emotional and right now everyone’s emotions were running high, and she knew the song was an emotional song which wouldn’t help her daughter remain calm. But as she looked at the look on Olivia’s face she could see how much she wanted to hear the song, looking at Raven the two women exchanged an unsure glance, before Clarke closed her eyes for a second and took a breath thinking about what Lexa would do in this situation, opening her eyes she looked at Olivia’s hopeful face and spoke “Ok, Auntie Rae can sing the song for you, but if you get upset or I think your too sad then Auntie Rae will stop singing, ok”

 

“Ok…. Thank you, Mommy,” Olivia smiled brightly at her Mommy the happiness on her face for everyone in the room to see. Turning back to her Auntie Rae she smiled leaning forward and hugging her tightly. Pulling back, she excitedly said “Move closer to Mama, Auntie Rae, then I can hold Mama’s hand while you sing” Raven did as told by her niece and moved lifted Olivia onto her chest as she stood up holding her niece with one hand as she used the other to pull the chair towards Lexa’s bed until they were close enough for Olivia to be able to hold her Mama’s hand. As they sat back down Olivia looked over at her Mommy and softly said “You too Mommy…then you can hold Mama’s hand, and then I’ll be holding both your hands…” She sweetly smiled, Clarke laughed softly and did as her daughter asked moving as close to Lexa as she could, looking down at her wife’s left hand, no longer sporting a wedding ring, Clarke made a mental note to get the ring back from the nurses it wasn’t that she didn’t trust the people in the hospital to keep it safe, it was more she just wanted it on her person, to look at and to hold when she got a little upset. Leaning forward against the bed, Clarke rested her elbows on the edge of the bed, lifting Lexa’s left hand gently to slide her own underneath it, before she had a chance to look up she felt someone tapping the side of her left leg, turning she saw her son standing next to her smiling at her, realising he must have wanted to hold his Mama and Mommy’s hands as well, she signalled for him to go under her left arm which he quickly, once he was under her arm she used her free hand to lift the little boy onto her lap making sure she was far enough back in her seat not to fall off the chair. Once Oscar was securely on her lap she wrapped her right arm around his waist allowing him to reach forward and placed his left hand between his Mama and Mommy’s hands, Clarke placed a kiss on the side of Oscar’s head as he leant against her a little more. Looking over at Olivia and Raven she noticed Octavia had now moved next to them so she was closer to Lexa as well. Smiling at her sister in law and daughter she watched as Olivia reached forward and grabbing hold of her Mama’s hand, half turning to Raven and softly and wetly saying “You can start now Auntie Rae….”

 

“Ok then….” Raven started leaning forward the best she could without causing her niece to fall onto the floor, reaching forward with her right hand she rested it on top of Olivia’s hand, which was tightly gripping onto her Mama’s hand as she relaxed into her Auntie Rae’s chest, waiting to hear the song she’d been told about:

 

****

** Eva Cassidy - Time After Time **

****

_Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick_

_And think of you_

_Caught up in circles confusion_

_Is nothing new_

_Flashback - warm nights_

_Almost left behind_

_Suitcases of memories_

_Time after_

_Sometimes you picture me_

_I'm walking too far ahead_

_You're calling to me, I can't hear_

_What you've said_

_Then you say - go slow_

_I fall behind_

_The second hand unwinds_

_[Chorus]_

_If you're lost you can look - and you will find me_

_Time after time_

_If you fall I will catch you - I'll be waiting_

_Time after time_

_After my picture fades and darkness has,_

_Turned to grey_

_Watching through windows - you're wondering_

_If I'm OK_

_Secrets stolen from deep inside_

_The drum beats out of time_

_[Chorus]_

_You said go slow_

_I fall behind_

_The second hand unwinds_

_[Chorus]_

_Time after time_

_Time after time_

_Time after time_

_Time after time_

 

As she finished the song Raven peaked forward trying to see if Olivia was crying or not, during the song Clarke hadn’t given her any indication that the little girl was crying at all. But everytime she glanced at the blonde she didn’t give her one hint that the little girl was crying. Releasing Lexa’s hand, Raven peaked around the side of her niece looking at her cheeks seeing Olivia’s cheek wasn’t covered in tears but was completely dry, and her lips were seemingly curved into a smile. Not disturbing her niece, she slowly sat back against the chair, exchanging a small smile with Clarke, keeping her left arm wrapped around her niece’s waist she looked to her right smiling at Octavia before reaching out her hand to her wife, who quickly and happily accepted it interlocking their fingers, keeping her eyes on her wife resting her head against her chair. Minutes after minutes passed by without anyone in the room saying a word, the silence was broken when Olivia softly spoke;

 

“That was a nice song Auntie Rae”

 

“I’m glad you liked it Livy” Raven happily responded turning her head back in her niece’s direction seeing Olivia was now looking at her.

 

“I did, it was really nice…. some of the words were sad but I held Mama’s hand, so I didn’t cry…” Olivia proudly smiled at her Auntie turning and smiling just as proudly at her Mommy. Within seconds she turned back to her Auntie Rae softly continuing “Can you sing me more songs Auntie Rae?” All the adults in the room softly giggled at the question as Raven nodded her head at her niece trying to think of another song to sing, hoping to keep the smile on Olivia’s face.

 

* * *

 

** One Week Later **

** Monday 10th April 2017-10:00am **

Days after days had passed by for Clarke and Raven, more nurses and doctors had come in and out of the hospital room, numerous changes of bandages, numerous changes of IV Bags and even more antibiotic injections. Days on end of watching the nurses and doctors continuously do all these things without any signs of Lexa waking up. Nothing they tried worked, all the doctors would say to her and Raven was it was a matter of time, they had stopped giving Lexa Benzodiazepines completely over six days ago, they told Clarke that Lexa’s body was beginning to heal and wasn’t fighting against itself or the medication which meant they no longer needed to give her a mild sedative everyday. But still Lexa was awake and they couldn’t tell her why, all they kept saying again and again was ‘give her body time’ but Clarke was beginning to get tired of waiting on her wife. Everyday she’d whisper in her wife’s ear, telling her not to be lazy and to wake up. She meant the lazy part as a joke but the wake up part was the most serious thing that would leave her lips everyday, all she wanted was her wife and their normal life back. Everyday she spent in that hospital she realised how much she missed the small things, like having breakfast with the twins, or spending the morning cuddling in bed with Lexa and the twins, the small words of love that her and Lexa would exchange, even putting taking the twins to nursery was something she missed so much. She missed being at home as well, being able to have a shower when she wanted, she’d only been home once in the last week and that was for a quick shower and to grab some of hers and Lexa’s clothes, she didn’t stay home long because she wanted to relieve Raven at the hospital so the brunette could do the same. But of course the biggest thing she missed was the twins, since a week ago Jake had only brought the twins to see their Mommy and Mama and Auntie Rae on two days, mainly because Clarke didn’t want them to get used to coming to a hospital, she also didn’t want them to have to keep seeing Lexa like this, she hoped that her wife would wake up before the twins came in today and surprise them, but at the moment it wasn’t looking like that would happen in the next week let alone the next few hours.

 

Although she hated being in this room every single day each day was made a million times better by having Raven there. Since she’d seen Octavia a week ago, Raven would talk to her almost the whole day, they’d talk about everything Lexa related to everything not Lexa related, Clarke didn’t realise how much she’d need that until Raven started talking to her again, just having someone to chat to, even if it was about stupid little things or TV gossip, it made everything so much easier to handle day to day. And most of all it made Clarke feel like she was still normal and like there was still so much more hope than she originally thought there was. Having Raven there also helped both times the twins had come in with Jake, both times Olivia asked Raven to sing Time after Time, saying she loved the song so much that she wanted to hear it again and again, followed by more songs that Raven and Lexa used to sing when they were younger. Those songs had led to Raven mentioning Costia and TJ, that led to her having to explain to the twins who they were and why they never say them, which was no easy task, everything that happened between Raven, Lexa and their Mama was extremely complicated and extremely adult. Raven did her best and the twins seemed to understand it. That had led to Raven thinking about her brother and sister and parents and whether or not they knew what had happened to Lexa. Once the twins had left Raven asked Clarke her thoughts and Clarke honestly told Raven that Costia and TJ deserved to know their sister was in hospital, Raven knew the blonde was right and immediately left the room to call them and tell them what happened, she returned nearly an hour later with tear stained cheeks, she told Clarke everything that had been said on the phone. That was days ago now and everyday that had passed by Costia and TJ would send Raven a text message asking how Lexa was doing and if there had been any changes, Clarke could tell it broke Raven’s heart a little everytime she had to response saying nothing had changed.

 

On top of the stress the last nearly two weeks had been filled with, Clarke and Raven had been told this morning that Roan still hadn’t been caught. Bellamy dropped by telling them what was going on with the case, he told them about the footage of the incident, he told them how Lexa always made sure she stayed in view of a camera, they joked about how she probably did it without realising, he told them how the microphones had picked up every single word exchanged between Lexa and Roan, neither women really cared about any of that, all they cared about was Roan being caught. It was unsettling to them to think that he was out there, and neither of them were with their family anymore. Bellamy finished updating them telling them he was about to go and follow up some leads with a colleague, he hugged them both and promised to check in on Jake, Abby and the twins, as well as Octavia and Zachary, once he finished his shift that night. They both thanked him before he left both of them falling into a silence, their attention turning to their phones quickly as they updated everyone they needed to, both of them checking in on their kids at the same time.

 

Once finished on their phones they both placed them into their pockets falling into a natural conversation about the twins and Zachary. Time went by without either of them noticing, until there was a small knock at the door, both of them turned their attention to see Jake and Abby standing at the door with the twins on either side, Olivia was holding Abby’s hand and Oscar was holding Jake’s. As soon as her eyes landed on her children, Clarke was stood up from the chair a massive smile on her face as she walked forward stopping a foot or two in front of them as she happily let out;

 

“Oh, my babies…” Smiling brightly the twins let go of their grandparent’s hand running to their Mommy until they connected with their Mommy’s chest and hugged her tightly, it was moments like this that Clarke knew she did the right thing letting the twins miss nursery today, seeing them after days apart was the best feeling she got in days. “I’ve missed you two so much”

 

“We missed you too Mommy” The twins responded at the same time, holding onto their Mommy a little tighter before they let go and pushed themselves off, smiling brightly at their Mommy, both of them leaving one of their hands on her shoulder.

 

“I’m sorry you both have to miss me…I know it really really sucks…like loads and loads”

 

The twins giggled at their Mommies words, “It’s ok Mommy, you have to be here with Mama…” Oscar softly responded, as soon as he stopped speaking Olivia took over;

 

“In case Mama wakes up, and you have to make sure she isn’t hearing silence”

 

“Silence?”

 

“Yeah…. Grandma said that even though Mama is asleep she can hear everything…that means she can hear you and Auntie Rae”

 

“Grandma told you this?”

 

“Yeah, because I was a little sad Mommy…” Before her Mommy could respond Olivia’s free hand shoot in between her and her Mommy, holding her thumb and finger close together she continued “But only this much Mommy…so a little little bit…. but Grandma told me Mama still hears me, and everyone so I can still talk to her…”

 

“You can Princess…do you want to talk to her now?”

 

“In a minute Mommy, I have to say Hello to Auntie Rae first”

 

Clarke laughed at her little girl, nodding softly at her she watched as Olivia turned around and ran over to her Auntie Rae jumping onto her lap once she was close enough, Raven reached forward catching the little girl and lifting her, sitting on her Auntie Rae’s lap facing her Olivia sweetly said;

 

“Hi Auntie Rae”

 

“Hey Livy Liv, How’s my favourite niece?”

 

“I’m your only niece silly billy” Olivia laughed out giggling at her Auntie Rae as she made a face a responded

 

“When then you have to be my favourite don’t you?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“So how have you been?”

 

“Good, me and Oscar have been playing with Grandpa loads and he keeps losing all the games to us”

 

“Is he that bad at games?”

 

“Yeah…. Did you miss me Auntie Rae?”

 

“Of course, I did, I couldn’t wait or you to come back and see me…did you miss me?”

 

“I always miss you Auntie Rae”

 

“You do?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“Ahhh come here, you little cutie pie….” Raven let out touched by her niece’s words to her, reaching her arms forward she wrapped her arms around Olivia squeezing her tightly making Olivia laugh. After a minute she let go looking at Olivia she noticed the excited look on Olivia’s face letting the little girl speak;

 

“Did you hear what Grandma told me?”

 

“I did”

 

“Do you think Mama can hear me?”

 

“I think she can, she’s just getting loads of sleep”

 

“Mama likes sleeping loads” Olivia softly laughed

 

“She does, she did when we were little as well…. she was always sleeping”

 

Olivia let out a small dirty laugh at her Auntie’s sentence. Turning around she looked over at her Mama, smiling softly she turned back to Raven “Can you put me next to Mama please? I wanna say hello” Raven softly nodded her head seeing Clarke’s small nod in her direction, lifting her niece with her from the chair Raven walked over to the hospital placing Olivia carefully on the bed next to her Mama, the same place Olivia had sat the last two times that her and Oscar had visited the hospital. Before she could say anything to the little girl, Olivia looked over to her brother and softly said “Come Oz, we can say what we practiced” Oscar smiled brightly removing his hand from his Mommy’s shoulder before walking to his Auntie Rae, once he was in front of her Raven leant down lifting the little boy onto the bed but lifting him onto the other side of the bed than Olivia was, the side rail had been up since the nurse left the room thirty minutes ago so she knew he wouldn’t fall. Once they were both where they wanted to be they carefully moved forward, avoiding any wires that connected to their Mama’s arms and body, leaning themselves down near their Mama’s ears they both whispered into their Mama’s ears for a few minutes before they pushed themselves up and smiled at each other, reaching across their Mama hugging gently. Releasing her brother from their hug she turned to their Auntie Rae smiling and holding her arms out “I’m done now Auntie Rae” Raven smiled lifting the girl from the bed, looking to Oscar she smiled when he shook his head signalling he wanted to stay where he was. Sitting back in the chair she sat Olivia on her lap, “Guess what I did at Nursery Auntie Rae?”

 

“What did you do? ….come on tell me all about it, and I mean every single thing you’ve done” Raven responded keeping her arms around her niece’s waist to keep her safely on her lap, as Olivia leant forward a little, Raven noticed that Oscar was sat happily where she left him, only now his hand was holding onto his Mama’s and he was talking to her, she couldn’t hear what he was saying but she could see his lips moving.

 

**-An Hour Later 11:05am-**

Olivia had finished explaining everything she did at nursery to Raven, she climbed down from Raven’s lap and went around to her Mommy sitting herself on her Mommy’s lap and telling everything that she’d done since she last saw her. Clarke smiled as she listened to her daughter explain her day and tell her every small detail of her day, Clarke loved how her daughter’s voice was filled with happiness and her face contorted and changed with every part of the story. Once Olivia was finished she paid against her Mommy’s chest snuggling into her chest and smiling as she looked over at her Grandma and Grandpa, who were sat on chairs they retrieved from another room after asking permission, as she looked at her Grandparents she began talking to them, telling them that she’d told her Mommy and Auntie Rae everything she did at nursery. After she spoke she went silent closing her eyes contently leaning her head against her Mommy’s shoulder.

 

As she watched Olivia sitting on Clarke’s lap, Raven turned her attention to Oscar who was still on his Mama’s bed, only now he was laying down on his Mama’s chest, she smiled at how he must have remembered them saying Lexa had a bad stomach. She looked at him smiling at how peaceful her looked laying with his Mama, but also how happy he looked, like he’d been waiting to hug her for an eternity. As she looked at him she noticed Lexa’s hand was on Oscar’s lower back, as she noticed it her eyebrows rose slightly as she wondered how it got there, looking over the wires she noticed they were all still connected and nothing had been moved or damaged that she could see anyway. Not thinking into it anymore she turned her attention back to Olivia, just as her niece was looking her way, exchanging a smile with Olivia she watched as Olivia looked up at her Mommy and asked;

 

“Mommy, can you tell me a story?”

 

“What kind of story would you like baby?” Clarke asked brushing her hand through her daughter’s hair contently as the little girl leant against her.

 

“One about Mama….I love stories about Mama…their funny when you tell them”

 

“Are you sure about that Princess?”

 

“I’m sure Mommy”

 

“Ok then….” Clarke soothed placing a gentle kiss on her daughter’s forehead as she continued “What Mama story would you like to hear?”

 

“The first date one”

 

“The one I was gonna tell you last week?”

 

“Yes, please Mommy that one”

 

“Mommy….” Oscar’s voice came through gaining Clarke’s attention, looking over at her son she saw his attention on her as he sat on his knees looking over at her.

 

“It’s wake up time”

 

“I know you’ve just woken up baby boy….why don’t you sit there and listen to my story and it’ll wake you up a little more” Clarke answered, Oscar’s sentence didn’t really make any sense to her but she guessed that he was referring to himself waking up.

 

“Noooo Mommy…It’s Mama’s wake up time”

 

“What do you mean O….” Before she could finish saying her son’s name she noticed the hand on Oscar’s side, it was Lexa’s hand and it was moving, gently tapping her son’s side. The hope rose inside her as she carefully lifted her daughter from her lap placing her on the floor and quickly moving over to Lexa, seeing Raven looking at Lexa’s bed with slight shock but happiness on her face, rushing over to Lexa’s bedside she looked down at her wife seeing the one thing she’d been wanting to see since she entered this hospital nearly a fortnight ago. Lexa’s eyes were open and looking right at her, that green she’d spent eight years loving, those eyes their kids had inherited, looking back at her filling her with pure happiness and delight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did everyone think of this chapter, delayed massively I know but was it worth it???? Only you guys can tell me…so anyway Lexa is finally AWAKE….YEEEAAAAHHHH lol I’ve had that scene in my mind for a while and am so happy to get it out, didn’t turn out as great as I wanted but I’ll add more in the next part….I’m not gonna give too much away but there will be flashbacks as well as more of Lexa waking up…how will she deal with it? And what damage has been done….Anyways I’ll leave you all to get on with sleeping and working or whatever your doing 


	33. Forever and Eternity Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEELLLLLOOOO, Hope everyone is doing great, Just a quick note to say THANK YOU to everyone that has taken the time to read, comment or give kudos on this story's last chapter...I appreciate you all taking the time...I hope you enjoy this chapter and as always please feel free to leave a comment or message me personally :-) 
> 
> ALSO....THANK YOU TO: Phoenixdjones for writing the flashback and the sex scene
> 
> Hope you all enjoy :-)

** Chapter Thirty-Forever and Eternity Part Two **

** Thursday 4th February 2010 **

** Arkadia High School **

** Outdoor Food Courtyard **

****

_It wasn't planned. It wasn't that they knew it was gonna be tonight. There was nothing fancy about the day, it wasn't prom, no anniversary, just your normal Thursday. They woke up, sent each other mushy texts like always until they met up at before school, made out a bit and went to class. When the lunch bell rang Clarke and Lexa sat with each other and talked over lunch, most of their lunch was spent taking to their friends but every single day since they made things official between them at the end of their lunch they’d end up talking amongst themselves ignoring their friends in favour of finding out if they’d be in the same classes together in the afternoon, most days they weren’t which they both hated._

_“So, come on you know the drill, what classes do you have this afternoon?” Clarke asked leaning a little closer to her girlfriend as her hand brushed over Lexa’s forearm_

_“Well as normal on a Thursday afternoon I have Physics, Advance Literature and finally the all exciting and happiness ensuing Economic studies”_

_“Damn it…why can’t we have the same Economic studies class…I mean what are they teaching you that they aren’t teaching me anyway…”_

_“I think it’s more surnames and date of births that dictate those classes the others are probably intelligence”_

_“So, your saying we’re in different classes because I’m older and dumber than you?”_

_“No, I think it’s more because your older…smarter and way more talented than me”_

_“Very nice comeback” Clarke smirked leaning forward and pecking Lexa on the cheek smiling at her softly “Do you wanna come over after school? I could really use some help with math.”_

_“You don't have to make up an excuse for me to come over, I would have come willingly either way.” Lexa smirked at Clarke, the same smirk that she knew Clarke couldn’t resist. Just like she always did at the sign of that smirk Clarke smiled and closed the gap between them capturing Lexa’s lips. Keeping their lips connected for about ten seconds before breaking and reconnecting their lips again, numerous times until she felt herself getting a little bit hot under the collar._

_“Alright Casanova….” Clarke reinforced laughing and pushing Lexa’s chest softly creating some distance between them. “Finish your lunch” Lexa smirked at Clarke turning her attention back to her food, falling into conversation with her sister and their friends as she ate. Clarke did the same, both continuing until they had both finished their lunch, both taking their final bite of food just as the first end of lunch bell went, quickly taking their trays over to the bin and table of dirty trays they placed their trays on the top of the piles on the table, before Clarke took hold of Lexa’s hand and pulled her girlfriend towards the corridor where both their lockers were located. Reaching their lockers Clarke turned them pushing Lexa against her locker and capturing her lips, as the minutes passed by the women broke apart continuing to give sweet kisses to each other, both in that sweet high school honeymoon stage. As their lips kept connecting Clarke couldn’t help but think about what she hadn’t yet told her girlfriend, those three words they haven't told each other yet. Those three words that she knew applied to her, that she knew she felt, and she was almost one hundred percent sure Lexa felt back. But after nearly eight months together either had said that they loved the other yet, but they both know they did, well at least they told themselves they did. As the final end of lunch bell went, Clarke placed one final kiss on Lexa’s lips before they broke apart, both going to their lockers and grabbing their books for their next lessons. Once they both had their books they met at the end of the hall, their hands connecting as they walked towards the English block, once they reached it Clarke leant into Lexa connecting their lips for a second before pulling back and softly speaking “I will meet you at your car after the last bell.” Lexa nodded her head softly leaning forward pecking Clarke on the lips once before releasing her girlfriends hand and watching as Clarke walked into the block, only turning and rushing to where she needed to be once Clarke was out of sight._

_The rest of the school day went on until at 15:30 came around and the sound of last bell rang through the halls. The sound brought a massive smile to Clarke’s face as she quickly packed up her books, quickly saying goodbye to Octavia and the rest of friends before she took off heading to the parking lot, as she reached it she looked around quickly she saw Lexa’s car parked up near the curb a few steps in front of her. Quickly moving to the car she pulled the door open and jumped into the car with a huge smile on her face as she came face to face with her smiling girlfriend, without a word she across the car smashing her lips into Lexa’s. After a few minutes had passed by she pulled back half smirking and half smiling at Lexa as she softly asked;_

_“How was your day beautiful?”_

_Lexa giggled softly at Clarke’s question before turning the ignition of the car on and answering, “It was okay…” She answered as she turned out of the school parking lot, glancing at Clarke as she added “Would have been better if we had every class together but I coped.... just about”_

_“Smooth talker” Clarke smiled out, internally impressed at her girlfriend’s line, leaning across the car again she gently kissed Lexa on the cheek just as Lexa pulled up at a red traffic light. Turning to Clarke she captured her lips for a second before releasing them and returning her attention to the road. Clarke felt the happiness inside her shoot all the way up because she could never give too many kisses to a goddess like Lexa. The drive to Clarke’s house was short. Even though it was a short journey, Lexa would place a kiss on Clarke’s cheek everytime they would stop for a second. Those kisses only made it harder for Clarke to control herself, she really wanted to jump on her girlfriend and kiss her until the whole world just disappeared. Twenty minutes after they left the school parking lot they pulled in the Griffins’ driveway, Clarke quickly realised that her mother's car was not parked in the driveway like it normally was. Lexa parked in the driveway turning off the ignition and removing her keys, as Clarke got out of the passenger’s side Lexa couldn’t resist getting a quick glance at her girlfriends ass, smirking she got out of the driver’s seat going instantly to the boot and opening it grabbing her backpack and throwing it over her right shoulder before closing the boot and locking the car, walking around the car until she was next to Clarke, who was patiently waiting for her, taking hold of each other’s hands they walked onto the patio and towards the door._

_Within seconds Clarke had unlocked the front door and the two teenagers were inside the house. Looking around Clarke softly said, “Mom must be working another shift at the hospital.” She already guessed that due to the fact her mother’s car wasn’t in the driveway but she never knew, sometimes her Mom was so tired she’d get a lift home from a colleague then get her dad to drop her off. It wasn't unusual for her to go a couple of days without seeing her mother. Removing their trainers, the walked through the house they went straight to the kitchen, Clarke saw a note on the counter, she picked it up and read it aloud:_

_Clarke honey,_

_I got called in for an emergency surgery, dinner is in the oven, you just need to take the foil off and cook it for one hour on 350 degrees. I love you and I will see you in the morning before school._

_Love Mom_

_xxx_

_P.S. Don’t Forget your father, brother and sister are staying at your Aunt Diane’s for the night as planned._

_P.P.S. Tell Lexa I said Hi…make sure you don’t stay awake too late and Lexa gets home early please_

_Xxx Love you xxx_

_Clarke looked at Lexa. “Well looks like another night to myself. I'll start dinner and then we can go to my room and start our homework…. My mom says Hi by the way…” Clarke smiled out seeing the nervous look on Lexa’s face “It’s ok Lex, she doesn’t have a problem with us being here alone, as long as we’re responsible and don’t burn the place down…and as long as you don’t stay too late she’s fine with it…so is my dad…” Clarke noticed Lexa’s face fill with relief making her smile softly. “Why don’t you go up and get set up I’ll put this on…” Lexa nodded her head turning and heading to Clarke’s room, not questioning why they were going to study in Clarke’s bedroom when the whole house was free. As long as she was alone with Clarke she was beyond happy._

_Lexa did as Clarke said, turning around and walking out of the kitchen and to Clarke’s bedroom. Once she was in Clarke’s bedroom, grabbing her books from her backpack she placed it near Clarke’s chest of drawers, walking over to her girlfriend’s bed where they always ended up studying, placing the books on the bed she sat herself on it, and started to sort out her homework, although they didn’t have math together they still had the same teacher, and she always taught the whole grade the same subject at the same time. And she loved math so helping Clarke would be a breeze. About five minutes later Clarke came in the room, backpack hanging lazily over her shoulder, her face clearly saying she was ready to get to the boring stuff, in her mind if she got her work done quickly she could spend the rest of her time kissing Lexa until the brunette had to return to her own home. Clarke sat down right next to Lexa and pulled out her book to the same page Lexa was on._

_“Are you ready?” Lexa asked Clarke watching as a smile spread across Clarke’s face and she closed the distance between them capturing Lexa’s lips with her own, unable to stop herself, their lips stayed connected for a few seconds before Clarke pulled back smiling brightly picking up her pencil then looking at the brunette smirking and speaking;_

_“Now I’m ready”_

_Lexa laughed for a second before she cut right to the chase, concentrating completely as she explained the equations to her girlfriend. To her own surprise Clarke was actually getting it, in class earlier she didn’t understand a thing, but here with Lexa, she was taking in every single word Lexa was speaking, as if she was entranced with everything Lexa did or said. About Thirty minutes must have passed by when Lexa leaned across Clarke to grab a clean piece of paper, as she did so her breasts brushed against Clarke’s arm. Clarke’s breath caught in her throat, she’d hoped that Lexa didn't catch it, but of course she did. She avoided looking into her girlfriend’s eyes knowing that she wouldn’t be able to stop herself from kissing the brunette if she did. Instead she grabbed the paper Lexa was originally reaching for knowing that she really needed to finish this homework and fully understand what she’d been taught in Math. Handing the paper to the brunette in the corner of her eye seeing that Lexa was avoiding looking her in the eyes just as she was doing with the brunette. Smirking at the knowledge she continued to listen to her girlfriend explaining every equation that her teacher and tried to explain to her earlier. Before she knew it another hour had passed by and they were finally finished with every single piece of homework they had been given, not just math, Clarke laughed internally at the fact that her need and want to make out with Lexa had been so strong that she finished all her homework just so she wouldn’t be interrupted._

_Finally, for the first time in what felt like an eternity, but was actually only One hour and Thirty Minutes, Green met Blue and instantly locked on to each other. Unable to control her mind, Clarke looked down to Lexa’s lips, to her eyes and then back again. Having an Internal battle with herself about what she wanted more, part of her wanted to lunge forward and claim Lexa’s lips, and the other part wanted to stare into her beautiful forest green eyes forever. It didn't take long for the decision to be made for her as the second as Lexa’s mouth claimed hers. There was nothing sweet or soft about it. It was lustful and passionate. It was hot and heavy. Clarke moaned into the kiss, unable to suppress it as their tongues against each other battling for dominance. For Lexa the kiss only made her want Clarke more, she couldn’t explain why or even how, all she knew was it did. She knew that just being near Clarke was enough to take her breath away, but to be here, kissing her, having her warm tongue in her mouth, it made Lexa’s core ache in the best way. It was seconds, or minutes, neither one of them were paying any attention to the time, when the kiss started to slow down. It was still full of passion, but sweet passion, neither fighting for dominance anymore. Without thinking or second guessing herself Lexa started lean into Clarke, her chest pressing against the Blonde’s more as she did, silently requesting for her to lay down instantly Clarke complied, lowering herself backwards slowly pushing her books completely off the bed as Lexa moved with her, until she was lying flat on her back._

_Lexa laid on top of Clarke with most of her weight on her elbows, not wanting to hurt her in anyway. She started kissing down Clarke’s jawline slowly moving onto her neck, moving right to the spot she knew would drive Clarke crazy. Kissing her way to just under Clarke’s earlobe, she sucked it until there was a faint pink mark, all the while Clarke squirming underneath her. Clarke started to run her hands up Lexa’s sides just under her shirt. The warm, soft skin getting goose bumps in the trail of Clarke’s fingertips. Lexa had no control as her hips jumped straight forward pressing into Clarke’s core, the action causing the blonde to let out a loud, unexpected moan. Lexa’s head snapped up out of mixture of shock and fear. She didn't mean to buck into Clarke like that but she wasn’t able to control her actions. Not that she didn't want to, or that she didn't have literal dreams of all the ways she would like to be with Clarke in that way. She wanted to do all those things with Clarke but she would never just push herself onto Clarke like that, the last thing she wanted Clarke to thing was that their relationship was all about sex, because for her it wasn’t, it was about pure love. As if Clarke was reading Lexa’s mind, she gently placed her hands on Lexa’s face and looked straight in to her eyes;_

_“You don’t need to jump back, you're fine I promise…. you aren't doing anything that I don't REALLY want you to be doing….in fact can you please do that again?”_

_Clarke gave Lexa the sexiest smirk she’d ever seen, not arguing with the blonde she leant back down and reconnected her lips with Clarke’s neck once more. After minutes of exploring Clarkes neck, her hands had also travelled up Clarke’s shirts. Clarke silently encouraged her girlfriend, not just by releasing a series of LOUD moans, but by moving her hands to gentle hold onto Lexa’s guiding them upwards until Lexa’s hands were firmly on her breast, squeezing her hand over Lexa’s making Lexa’s hand contract and squeeze her breasts, removing her hand she recaptured Lexa’s lips as the brunette’s hands continued to work away squeezing her breasts softly but firmly, enjoying the feeling Clarke began grinding her hips a little into Lexa’s. Minutes passed by, and with every single one that went by Lexa got lost in her own mind. She got was so lost in her mind and feelings, so lost in the feeling of having, in her opinion, Clarke’s heavenly chest in her hands, so lost in having her mouth on Clarke’s, and probably mostly she was lost in the feeling of Clarke grinding against her, pressing their pussies together. The feeling was intense. Way more intense that she was prepared for, the feeling became TOO intense for her, so much so that without meaning to she broke their kiss and paused. The action instantly made Clarke freeze in the process. After a minute of silence and non-movement, Clarke was the first to speak;_

_“Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?”_

_Lexa looked down at the blonde with wide eyes, swallowing back and wetting her lips softly she took a small nervous breath, before she blinked and responded “_

_“No, Not at all….I was actually about to ask you the same…if you’re okay I mean…” Lexa mumbled out trying to find her words as she continued to feel the heat from Clarke against her own body “I don't want to push you into going further than your ready to. I only pulled back because I was getting a little lost in the moment… I mean your just so unbelievably beautiful and your moans weren't helping either, I just…..I’ve never done this before, I mean I know we've talked about it and I know that you haven't either and I know that we’ve both done a things with other people but this is different, it would be… special... I want you to be happy and sure…I just don’t want you regretting an…..”_

_Before Lexa could finish what, she was saying Clarke leant up claiming Lexa’s lips with her own, her hands wrapping around Lexa’s waist and pulling her impossibly against her. She kissed her over and over and over again, before finally pulling back allowing Lexa to push herself up a little more so there was a small amount of space between them, looking into her girlfriend’s eyes, she spoke from her heart letting her words flow out without thinking about them “You are the sweetest, most caring, loving, beautiful….and Unique person I know. You make me feel like I could do anything I want to. You make me smile when I don’t want to, you always care about how I’m feeling and you make sure that I’m comfortable with anything we do. I don’t have to worry about what I say to you, I don’t have to think before I speak I can just be me…. I feel like I can fail and you’ll still support me no matter what, but if I’m wrong about something I also know that you’ll tell me, I don’t have to be anything but me when I’m with you…. that’s why I love you so much!!!!!!!!!”_

_As soon as the words left her lips Clarke stopped and sitting right up knocking a shocked Lexa off of her and onto her side. Clarke’s hand shot up to her mouth, her cheeks slowly turning redder, her eyes wider than Lexa had ever seen them. Clarke remained quiet not moving as she kept her hand covering her mouth, hoping Lexa had somehow not heard her love confession._

_“What did you just say?” Lexa’s eyes were just as wide as Clarke’s, except there was something behind them, Hope maybe? Hope that maybe Clarke just said she loved her? She knew that she was a million percent head over heels, deeply in love with Clarke, and the only reason she hadn’t said anything was because she had been absolutely terrified that those words would push Clarke away, and that maybe it was too fast for them. And of course the massive and main reason was, What if Clarke didn’t love her back? As she looked at the Clarke seeing the Blonde was still sat there with her hand over her mouth, her eyes still wide, her face filled with shock and embarrassment as she looked at everything and anything but Lexa. Taking in a small breath Lexa asked again. “What did you just say?” As Lexa looked at Clarke she could see the blonde looked so fearful and she wondered if it was it because she regretted saying it, or maybe she had the same fear as Lexa, that maybe it was too soon or that her feelings weren’t shared. Lexa asked one more time. “Clarke please say it again, I need to hear it again before I can actually believe it…. please just say it one more time.”_

_Clarke looked at the brunette next to her for the first time since she said those words, looking into Lexa’s eyes she found all the confidence and encouragement she needed. Slowly she removed her hand from her mouth, her eyes becoming less wide as she looked at the brunette, wetting her lips and taking a small breath, she opened her mouth. “I said that's why I love you so much.” Lexa looked at her for a second before she shuffled on the bed and closed her eyes, Clarke quickly started to speak again fearing what Lexa might say next, “I'm sorry ok please don't leave me…You don’t have to say it back, I know it’s really soon and you might not love me back and that’s ok…I just” Before Clarke had time to register anything Lexa had moved across the bed, closing the space between them and capturing Clarke’s lips were on hers, her love and passion for the blonde flowing through the kiss, as she pulled back she kissed the blonde’s cheek peppering kisses down her cheek before recapturing her lips unable to control how happy she felt right now. Lexa finally pulled back, placing her hands on Clarke’s cheeks as she smiled down at the blonde, a smile that was filled with pure love and happiness, she kept smiling as she spoke;_

_“I love you too Clarke….” She gave Clarke time to register what she’d just said, leaning forward hugging the blonde she smiled as Clarke wrapped her arms around her waist, pulling them closer together until her chest was flush against Clarke’s with Clarke’s back again on the bed. They kissed for few minutes upon minutes before both their hands began roaming once more but this time there was more to their touches, they meant more and made the other feel more than moments before hand. “I love you more than you can ever fathom more than even I can fathom right now, and I know that we’ve only been together for just over six months, but I’ve never felt this before but I know what it is, I know how strong it is….I know that when I think of my future, I think of you and me…getting married and maybe even having a family…I’ve never thought like that with anyone before…” Clarke didn’t give Lexa continue her sentence surging forward and connecting their lips together again. The kiss quickly built between the two of them, just like the kiss a minute before, both women’s hands began to move around the other’s body, Lexa’s hands moved down Clarke’s chest until they came to the bottom of Clarke’s t-shirt, her hand moved underneath the shirt, her fingers running gently and softly over the blondes skin, as she felt the heat rise inside herself again Lexa hesitated pulling out of the kiss, lost in her own thoughts unsure whether or not she and Clarke were both ready to take things to the next level, her hands stopping where they were at the bottom hem of Clarke’s t-shirt, it wasn't until Clarke spoke:_

_“Lex baby….listen, if you’re ready, then um….then so am I. I know it seems sudden but it really isn’t….things have been building between us and….and….I've dreamt about this moment a hundred different times, I want to do this, but most importantly I want to do this with you…I want to give you something I’ve never given someone before and never can again…”_

_“You don’t need to do that, not because I said how I feel…I love you Clarke and it isn’t about you giving yourself to me like that…I just Love you…not your body or anything else…you as a person…and if your not ready then it’s fine…I’d wait a million years for you if I had too….”_

_“Are you ready?”_

_“I am yeah….”_

_“And you trust me? Enough to give yourself to me fully?”_

_“One hundred percent…yes, I trust you with my life…with every stupid and important secret I have…and with everything I am”_

_“And that’s why I’m ready, you don’t expect anything but me…I’m ready for this Lex, I think I have been for a while I just never knew if you were ready…and now I know you are, I want to do this…I want to give myself to you because I know there isn’t a person in this world that I would trust with it more than you…”_

_That was all it took for Lexa to completely know that Clarke was just as ready as she was. It was all she needed to hear from the blonde to know that she was good enough to be trusted with something so precious. Following her feeling and instincts Lexa’s hands started roaming upwards, working their way underneath Clarke’s shirt continuing to travel upwards until they moved over her beautiful girlfriends, full breasts, she gently kneaded them and caressed them for minutes on end, until she moved her hand slowly under Clarke’s bra pushing it up slightly so she was grabbing Clarke’s bare breast, her fingers gently caressing one of Clarke’s nipples. Their kiss continued, more passion than either had felt flowing through the kiss. A combination of the kiss and caressing caused Clarke’s back to arch high, pressing hard into Lexa. Breaking the kiss for a second the two teenagers moved as one as they sat up, not a word exchanged between them as Lexa’s hands moved to the bottom hem of Clarke’s shirt again, this time she grabbed hold of the material slowly lifting Clarke’s shirt, pausing only for a second as she looked deep into her girlfriend blue eyes as if to ask for permission one final time. Clarke smiled shyly softly biting her bottom lip as she nodded once. Lexa lifted Clarke’s shirt the rest of the way until it was up and over her head, throwing the shirt behind her, she looked down her eyes falling on a beautiful purple lacy bra. Lexa’s breath hitched in her throat and for what felt like an eternity she was frozen. Frozen in place, staring at the very generous amount of breasts that were filling those lacy cups. She was snapped out of her frozen state when Clarke’s voice cheekily asked, “See something you like there Lex?” Lexa couldn’t help the singular nod and pure happiness filled smile that formed on her face as she quickly moved her eyes from Clarke’s breast to her eyes. Getting lost in those eyes she subconsciously licked her lips as she spoke;_

_“You’re so beautiful Clarke…Every inch of you is just so breathtakingly beautiful.” Clarke shied away slightly looking down as a deep red blush filled her cheeks. Seeing the red cheeks and shyness on Clarke’s face, Lexa reached forward and cupped Clarke's cheeks, tilting the blonde’s head upwards slightly so she could look into her eyes. “Don't shy away…I mean every single word of it. You are everything to me.” Clarke smiled brightly and widely a smile so big Lexa wasn’t sure she’d seen it before, with nothing but the smile Clarke crashed her mouth into Lexa’s. The kiss was quickly back to being hot and passionate. Both their hands were all over the place, so much so that neither of them could tell where Lexa’s started and Clarke’s ended, too caught up in their heightened passion. Before either of them knew how, they were both in nothing but their bra and panties. Their lips staying connected almost the whole time, only breaking apart for Clarke to pull Lexa’s t-shirt over her girlfriend’s head. Once Lexa’s shirt had been disposed of falling to the floor with Clarke’s, both of their hands and bean to roam more freely, both of them feeling more comfortable with each other and with exploring each other’s bodies. So much so that their hands had found their way to jean buttons and had quickly undone the button making it easier for the other to remove the jeans quickly and effectively. The jeans quickly being pulled down each women’s legs then being thrown onto the floor with their t-shirts. Now they were both in only their bra and panties, they kept kissing until Lexa was the first to attempt to take her bra off first, her hand moved behind her back until Clarke stopped her, gently grabbing her hand and moving it between their bodies, their lips hoovering over each other’s as Clarke softly whispered:_

_“Let me” Lexa softly smiled at Clarke not moving an inch as Clarke slowly moved her hand around to Lexa’s back, her fingers trailed along Lexa’s skin, caressing her skin with her fingertips all the way along until she felt her fingers come into contact with Lexa’s clasp. Unclasping the bra she held onto it making sure it didn’t snap against Lexa’s skin, Clarke slowly released the clasp as her other came around the take hold of the other side of the clasp, as she let go she held onto a side of the bra with each hand, gently she guided the bra forward over Lexa’s shoulders and down her arms until it was no longer covering the brunette, the now empty bra dropped onto Clarke’s lap, without a thought she moved it to her right leaving it wherever it feel as her eyes roamed Lexa’s toned body stopping at her chest. They weren’t as big as her own but they were perky and beautiful just like everything else that was Lexa. Following her instincts and desires Clarke leant down placing a gentle kiss on Lexa’s collarbone continuing to kiss her way down Lexa’s chest until she reached her desired target, Lexa’s breasts, kissing her way onto the soft breast she then took a pert nipple into her mouth. The action making Lexa squirm underneath her. She swirled her tongue around and around making sure to alternate between sucking, pulling, and licking._

_Lexa threw her head back and moaned loudly, internally she hoped it didn’t detour Clarke from her current actions, and they didn’t in fact the moan only spurred the blonde on more. She’d never felt this way before, in any way shape or form. She felt as if she was on edge. Having Clarke’s warm, wet mouth on her body was enough to make Lexa want to cum all on its own. How did she feel so good just by having her nipples played with? Was all she could think as Clarke worked wonders on her but no matter what it made her feel or think she wanted more in every single aspect. She wanted more Clarke, she wanted more skin to skin contact, she wanted to feel more. Losing herself in the moment and giving into her own desire her hands slowly shot around Clarke’s back her fingertips brushing over Clarke’s back as the blonde continued to work her magic on her, reaching forward she was able to unhook Clarke’s bra, trying to get a look at Clarke the way her girlfriend had of her. All efforts, focus and concentration she had in that moment disappeared as she felt Clarke’s hand travelling downwards. But she lost all effort when Clarke’s hand roamed down to her panties. Her want and need to feel Clarke, and to be with her in every way as Clarke’s hand moved underneath her panties moving down further her fingertips firmly rubbing over Lexa’s pussy. The sensation caused Lexa to jump slightly and let out a very load moan as Clarke’s fingertip grazed over her clit and her hips bucked in reaction as Clarke looked up at her and some what shockingly said. “You’re so wet”_

_She wasn’t sure if it was the words or the tone of Clarke’s voice but whatever it was, that was all it took for Lexa’s passion to take control of her, effortlessly she flipped them over so she was now straddling Clarke’s hips. Finally, she got to see Clarke in all her bare-chested glory. Her eyes raked over Clarke’s chest taking in every single detail of it, she scanned the blondes whole body up and down and then back up again, also committing these images to her memory. After scanning Clarke’s body a final time, she kept moving he eyes upwards until she reached Clarke’s eyes. She looked into her eyes deep down once more giving Clarke a chance to change her mind, but to her joy the blonde didn’t say a word._

_Unknown to her the blonde was literally speechless. She had an almost naked Lexa on top of her. All she could do was lick her lips and pull the brunette closer. Lexa needed nothing more she knew that Clarke’s passion and desire was just as heightened as hers were, she also knew that if she was going to far or if Clarke had changed her mind her girlfriend would let her know instantly instead of pulling her closer. So, she started trailing kisses down Clarke’s neck, down to her chest, where she stopped for numerous minutes to show them some much needed attention. She continued kissing her way down until she was at the blonde’s right nipple. With quickness and ease she pulled the nipple into her mouth only to release it with a loud POP. Every single move Lexa made Clarke was loving it, every single second of attention she was getting from her girlfriend was like a whirlwind of new feelings and desires and it felt amazing. She was enthralled in everything that was Lexa as she listened to her breathing, as she felt every movement Lexa made, she was paying attention to everything that was Lexa in this moment her smell and her touch, her voice, the feel of her fingertips against her skin every single thing that made this moment even more special, everything that she could commit to memory and go back and review. Everything that Lexa did that made her whole body feel like it was on fire. After minutes upon minutes of working and pleasuring Clarke’s breast Lexa broke away from Clarke’s nipples and continued to take her path down. Kissing her way down Clarke’s abdomen, one kiss at a time placed with an equal amount of love passion and care all the way down the blonde’s stomach right over her hip bone, stopping right at the tip of Clarke’s panties, she kissed her gently and without moving her lips looked into Clarke’s eyes. Clarke knew what she wanted every single part of her being want all of Lexa, but there was still a tiny amount of doubt in the pit of her stomach that was there, looking down at Lexa that doubt disappeared and was instantly replaced with worry that she was good enough as Lexa’s head rose to look at her._

_Eyes sought out each other’s for one final granting of permission before things got turned up a million notches. Lexa’s love for Clarke overpowering her sexual urges in this moment, wanting to make sure she listened to all of Clarke’s needs, wants and feelings, she never wanted to put pressure on Clarke or have her unhappy in any way. Clarke nodded her head up and down with amazing speed, making Lexa giggle. The vibration made Clarke’s hips buck slightly and softly into Lexa’s mouth. The feeling of Lexa’s mouth on her was enough to drive her insane. She looked down at her girlfriend watching as Lexa slowly started to pull down her panties, she watched as Lexa’s eyes stayed focused on her as she pulled the panties down her legs until the slide effortlessly from her feet. Once they were away from the blonde’s body Lexa discarded them onto the floor with the other numerous items of clothing. Leaning forward Lexa got close to Clarke’s pussy, not needing any further permission knowing Clarke fully trusted her she ran her nose up Clarke’s slit her tongue following instantly behind. As her tongue ran over Clarke’s slit she felt the blonde’s hips buck into her face at the contact making her smile internally knowing._

_As she continued pleasuring Clarke all Lexa could think about was the moment seconds ago that she’d tasted Clarke, how it felt and how at that moment she knew that this was the end for her completely. She knew she wanted or would want to taste another person for the rest of her days. But more than that she knew she’d never want to be this intimate with someone that wasn’t Clarke, the blonde was it for her. Returning her thoughts to the task at hand she started swirling her tongue around and around Clarke's now swelling clit. Minutes upon minutes went past and Lexa got further confirmation the blonde was enjoying it as Clarke reached down grabbing Lexa by the hair and gripping her fingers tight in her locks. Clarke let out a loud moan which only made Lexa work her faster. Lexa couldn't get enough of all that was Clarke. Lexa needed to make Clarke come so she could bask in the taste of her. A taste no one else has ever had the pleasure of tasting. As her own self-control began to fade away, and the sexual arousal burnt high in them both, Lexa decided now was the right time to take the next step. Licking her way to the top of Clarke’s pussy she looked up at the blonde, feeling her grip on her hair loosen ever so slightly lifting herself with her arms, pressing her hands in to the mattress underneath her and Clarke, she crawled up her girlfriend’s body until they were level, just as she stopped Clarke opened her eyes having felt her hands moving with Lexa’s hair her hands still tangled in the brunette’s curls. Keeping them level she held herself up with her left hand whilst her right hand slowly moved down Clarke’s body, running over her left breast down her stomach, over Clarke’s pussy and down until her fingers were lightly touching Clarke's entrance. Her fingers collecting the heavenly juices that were slowly seeping from Clarke. She lathered up her fingers holding them where they were for a second whilst she looked into the blonde’s eyes, leaning down capturing her lips with her own, as she did Clarke removed her left hand from Lexa’s hair moving it to rest on Lexa’s neck, she watched as the brunette softly asked, “Are you sure?”. Using her hold on Lexa’s neck she pulled her girlfriend into her connecting their lips for seconds, as they broke apart she looked into Lexa’s eyes as she whispered against her lips “Yes”. Swallowing back the salvia in her mouth, getting the taste of Clarke in her mouth, Lexa slowly angled her fingers and guided them into Clarke's entrance. Clarke wasn’t sure what it was going to feel like but she surprised to say the least, it was slightly painful at first but within a second that feeling had disappeared and the pleasure filled her body, so much pleasure that her hips bucked slightly, pushing Lexa’s fingers deeper inside her, and the sensation that sent through her body made her let out a massive moan of pleasure, she pulled Lexa against her wrapped her arm around the brunette holding her tightly against her as she buried her head in her neck. Lexa didn't falter she continued to work in and out of Clarke. She was on a mission to make Clarke feel like she has never felt before. She started off slow but as she listened to Clarke's hot breath she could tell that she was enjoying it, so she increased her pace a little not wanting to rush the blonde too much, because as far as she was concerned this was the first time they were making love, and many more times were to follow._

_Clarke never knew words could have such an effect on her. But having Lexa on top of her, inside of her, feeling Lexa’s breath on her neck, it was enough to send her into overdrive. Lexa moved in and out of Clarke faster and faster. She was relentless. She was gonna make Clarke come undone before her. She continued her motions, gently placing kisses on the side of Clarke’s head every time she felt the blonde grip her a little tighter. Clarke was starting to clamp down on Lexa’s fingers making it a little difficult to move, but she wasn't gonna give up. “Lex, I think I’m close” She softly said, she’d never come before but she was pretty sure that the pleasant pressure she was feeling in her stomach and the throbbing of her clit were a sign that something was about to explode inside her, it was almost like instinct she didn’t know why or how but she knew it was going to happen. Lifting her head up a little Lexa placed her forehead against Clarke’s looking into Clarke’s eyes as she pulled her fingers out only to add a third as she re-entered her girlfriend. “FUUUUUCKKKK” Clarke let out closing her eyes for a second as her mouth hung wide open as the feeling rushed through her whole body. Clarke again screamed out in pure bliss, the feeling of Lexa on top of her, of their skin pressing tightly against each other’s spurring her to let go, and let go she did with a massive moan of ecstasy her hand gripping onto Lexa’s side one final time before she released her hold, her whole body relaxing as she felt the come flowing from her pussy, Lexa’s fingers still moving inside her. Lexa didn't stop, she helped Clarke ride out her high waiting until the blonde had her eyes closed and was completely relaxed her breathing slow and purposeful as she laid on the bed not moving an inch after her first ever orgasm._

_Lexa could see her girlfriend was tired out and she had to admit inside she was happy with herself, that she could do that to Clarke, please her so much that the blonde looked like she was on cloud nine. She placed gentle kiss after kiss on Clarke’s cheek, slowly kissing down her jaw, then making her way down Clarke’s neck, she fully intended to lick every single drop of come from her girlfriend’s pussy and her own fingers. As she moved herself trying to move down the blonde she was stopped by Clarke grabbing onto her “Don’t…. please…come hold me” How could she resist or deny that request, Clarke looked so worried all of a sudden, but still completely happy and relaxed. Smiling at the blonde she instantly obliged moving back up she connected their lips together in a loving kiss. Then placing herself on the bed, laying on Clarke’s left-hand side, as she laid down she wrapped her right arm around Clarke’s shoulders pulling the blonde to her, at the same time she looked to her left seeing the blanket she’d brought Clarke during one of their trips to the mall just after they started dating. Smiling she reached for the blanket just about able to grab it she pulled on to it until it was in her hand fully, pulling it and throwing it over them both she felt Clarke turn into her a little more, looking down she smiled into Clarke’s eyes seeing her eyes were a darker shade of blue than normal, she couldn’t help but smile a little more before leaning down gently kissing Clarke, their lips stayed connected for a minute or two without escalation before they pulled back and Lexa asked:_

_“Are you okay, babe?”_

_Clarke looked deep into her eyes, just like Lexa had with her moments ago, she noticed her girlfriend’s eyes were a darker shade than they normally were, which she wasn’t even aware was possible. Smiling at her girlfriend’s question, and obvious worry for her feelings she pecked Lexa on the lips, then pecking her gently on her chin before she looked into her eyes and spoke; “Am I okay? Are you serious? ...Okay isn’t even a word that could remotely compare to how I'm feeling right, you are incredible Lexa, and that was amazing…no it wasn’t amazing…it was euphoric” Lexa smiled brightly and widely as she connected their lips together for a few seconds before pulling back;_

_“You know I meant every word I said before, I didn’t just say it to get into bed with you…I love you Clarke…. I know we’re young and maybe even a little naïve to somethings…. but I know how I feel and I know that one day…. I’m gonna marry you…I knew before today, because nobody will ever compare to you...Your my sunshine on a rainy day…You’re the light on my darkest days… and you make me happier than I ever thought I could be... and because of that and a whole bunch of other things…I know I will love you until the day i take my last breath!” Clarke blushed bright red and tried to shy away from Lexa, But Lexa wouldn’t let her, she gently lifted Clarke’s chin up so she was looking at her again, smiling she intently looked into Clarke’s eyes and continued, “I mean it Clarke…I can’t wait for the day I and everyone else gets to call you Clarke Woods”_

_Clarke couldn’t believe the words she was hearing, words that she never thought she’d hear from Lexa but she’d hoped she would. Processing the words Clarke leaned onto Lexa more, quickly rolling onto her girlfriend so she was laying on top of her, moving herself so she was sitting on Lexa’s hips she reached forward grabbing Lexa’s hand she laced their fingers together, their palms pressing against each other’s as she spoke. “I really like the sound of that Woods… and for the record…I love you too! More than you could ever begin to fathom, and it would be an honour to marry you….when that day comes...your right we’re young and maybe a little naïve but I know what I feel for you and I know my life wouldn’t be whole without you…All those things you say I am to you, you’re the same to me…you do the same for me…You make my heart grow everyday with love and affection….You will always be MY forever. Until I take my last breath my heart is yours…. Just please don't break it…”_

_Lexa used their laced fingers to pull Clarke down so their chests were connected together, Clarke leant her forehead against Lexa’s gently, their eyes looking into each other’s as a happy and content smile filled their faces “I promise you I won’t break your heart, or your trust…ever…. I’ll be there for you in any and every way you need Clarke. I will never hurt you…. because the smallest thought of losing you is a nightmare to me…. I can’t imagine not being with you, your it for me Clarke, and us being together it’s in the stars Clarke…You and Me... Until forever and eternity....Until the end. And then it’s you and me beyond, what that may hold…. I don’t know, but I do know that it will always be you.” She didn’t have a chance to continue her words, as Clarke leant forward capturing Lexa’s with such passion, Lexa almost lost her breath. Clarke kissed her with so much passion that it instantly turned Lexa on, sending a spark of arousal through her entire body as their lips worked together moving in harmony until Clarke pulled back and breathlessly looked into Lexa’s eyes saying “Now…I’m gonna take care of you” That is exactly what she did for the minutes upon minutes that came after, every minute that passed she showed Lexa exactly how much she loved her and just how meant to be they were, taking pleasure in pleasuring her girlfriend until the dinner timer went off._

* * *

 

** Boston University Hospital **

** Monday 10th April 2017 **

** Lexa’s Hospital Room-11:02am **

Clarke looked at her wife so many emotions rushing through her body as she saw those eyes she’d missed so much staring back at her, she watched as a smile spread across Lexa’s face as her eyes landed on her. A smile that she hadn’t seen in way too long, she was frozen on the spot all the things she’d do and say when Lexa woke up suddenly just disappearing. Tears of happiness rushed from her eyes as she tried to get herself to move, to blink to do something. Time seemed to stand still in this moment as memories rushed through her head, bad ones and good ones, great ones even, from the first time they met to their wedding day, to the day their family became complete with the birth of their twins. As the memories picked up she closed her eyes, trying to stop her brain from freaking out, she knew it was just her own way of processing that Lexa was awake that this was all real, that she was still going to get her happy ever after, in all those memories there was one thing that had always happened, she’d always looked into her wife’s eyes seeing that love staring back at her. That same look that she knew was being sent her way right now. But still she couldn’t open her eyes not yet, not until she’d processed everything in her head. She wasn’t sure how long she’d had her eyes closed for when she heard Olivia’s voice fill the room causing her eyes to shoot open;

 

“MAMA”

 

As Clarke’s eyes opened she saw her daughter running towards her Mama stopping at the edge of the bed, Lexa’s hand lifted up and came to rest gently on Olivia’s back. Trying to lift her head a little, the motion seemed to snap Clarke out of her thoughts and slight haze, the fear of Lexa hurting herself or popping her stitches quickly coming to the front of her mind causing her to move quickly forward until she was behind their daughter. As soon as she was close to Lexa, her wife stopped moving looking up at her smiling brightly, her facial features relaxing completely as she looked from Clarke to Olivia then to Oscar. Reaching down Clarke lifted Olivia onto the side of the bed feeling the little girl moving excitedly on the spot in front of her. She watched as Olivia looked happily at her brother, both of them smiling and carefully moving to hug their Mama at the same time, their small hands holding onto her Mama as tight as they could, neither of them wanting to hurt her. Lexa moved her arms to wrap around her children, wincing slightly as she did so. Her hands gently holding onto her twins as they rested against her, something that brought her more relief than any kind of medication could. Minutes passed by before Abby’s voice filled the room;

 

“Ok guys, I think we need to let the doctors have a look at Mama now” She loudly said as she moved forward stopping at the end of Lexa’s bed. As she stopped walking the twins lifted their heads looking at their Grandma, Oscar was the first one to respond to her;

 

“No, I wanna stay with Mama…”

 

“Mama needs to see a doctor, so they can check that she’s ok after being asleep for so long”

 

“NO….” Oscar loudly exclaimed his eyes glazing over with tears as he looked at his Grandma, instantly knowing that he shouldn’t have shouted at her “I’m sorry Grandma” He quickly added looking at her sadly, not needing his Mommy or Mama to tell him to apologise. “I don’t wanna leave Mama, Grandma” He explained as he moved closer to where his Grandma was stood at the end of his Mama’s bed.

 

“I know you don’t petal…but the doctor needs to check Mama over….” Abby explained to her grandson moving until she was pressed against the bottom of Lexa’s bed reaching her hand over she took her grandson’s hand in her own continuing “But as soon as the doctor is done you can come back and see Mama”

 

“Really?”

 

“Of course, if you don’t believe me you can ask Mommy”

 

Oscar turned nervously to look at his Mommy whose attention was already on him, softly he asked her “Can we Mommy?”

 

“Can you come back to see Mama?” Oscar nodded his head softly at her “Of course you can, once the doctor has looked at Mama you can come back and see her, I promise”

 

Oscar hesitated for a second turning and looking at his Mama who was smiling softly at him as she held onto his and Olivia’s hands the best she could. Looking to his sister the two exchanged a look, it looked to everyone else like the two were having a silent conversation, after a few minutes he looked back to their Grandma opening his mouth he softly spoke “Ok Grandma”

 

“Good boy, you can come with me and Grandpa to get something to eat because Grandma is really hungry”

 

“I’m hungry too Grandma”

 

“You are, well that’s great we can go get some cake”

 

“Yeah” Olivia and Oscar let out, both of them looked at their Mama, moving and placing a kiss on her cheek they both pulled back and spoke at the same time “See you soon Mama” The words made Lexa laugh softly at them as they turned and carefully got off the bed allowing their Mommy to lift them onto the floor. Once they were on the floor Oscar ran over to his Grandpa taking hold of his hand, whilst Olivia ran to her Grandma reaching up and holding her hand. Both of them smiling at their Mama and Mommy waving as their grandparents led them to the door of the room. Clarke waited a few minutes before she spoke making sure that her parents and more importantly the twins were no longer near enough to hear anything that might be sad, not that it was going to be bad or upsetting but she wasn’t sure what Lexa was going to say. The silence in the room went on for five minutes until Lexa’s voice filled the room as their eyes connected again;

 

“Hey sexy”

 

“Hey” Clarke whispered back moving forward and leaning down draping herself over her wife making sure not to hug her wife through fear of popping her stitches or causing Lexa any pain from any injury she had. As she was draped on Lexa she felt her wife’s hands come to rest on her back, her right hand rubbing up and down Clarke’s back. After an amount of time Clarke was unsure of she pushed herself up looking down at Lexa she gently tapped her on the arm;

 

“Owww…what was that for?”

 

“That was for scaring me half to death Lexa…. I thought I was gonna lose you”

 

Lexa’s face fell as she saw the agony and heartbreak on Clarke’s face, swallowing hard she reached her right hand up to gently caress Clarke’s cheek her own face filling with slight sorrow “I’m sorry….I promise you I’m not going anywhere any time soon.” She firmly said gently pulling Clarke to her until their foreheads were leaning against each other’s. “I’m never leaving you again” Lexa added swallow and lifting her head up connecting her and Clarke’s lips together in a gentle loving and reassuring kiss. A kiss that felt so real but unreal at the same time to Clarke, she savoured this moment, a moment she’d been thinking about and hoping for over the last two weeks, it wasn’t just the kiss she’d been thinking about and hoping for it was to hear Lexa’s voice, to see and look into those eyes again, and of course to feel her wife’s lips against her own. She kept their lips connected she felt herself relax almost completely when Lexa’s hands came to cup her face, her wife’s warm hands holding gently onto her cheeks holding her against her not allowing her to pull back even if she wanted to. Minutes went passed without either of them pulling back, it was easily twenty minutes since Lexa had spoken to Clarke for the first time in two long as hell weeks, but finally they both pulled back resting their foreheads against each other’s their eyes closed enjoying the moment they were getting to have together. Clarke took a few deep breathes opening her eyes at the exact same time Lexa opened hers, causing them to smirk at each other and let out a single giggle. Clarke looked into Lexa’s eyes suddenly a multitude of questions ran through her head, removing her forehead from her wife’s she sat up looking into Lexa’s eyes and asking;

 

“Are you in pain? What do you remember? Do you need anything?” Clarke looked around not seeing the doctor or any nurses, pressing the button on the remote hanging from the wall behind Lexa’s bed “Where the hell is the doctor?”

 

“Clarke…” Lexa’s voice cut through Clarke’s worries and words, causing the blonde to look back to her wife, closing her eyes then reopening them

 

“I’m sorry I just…”

 

“It’s okay…” Lexa reassured Clarke as she gently took Clarke’s hand in her own squeezing it softly as she smiled lovingly at Clarke. “And No I’m not in pain, I remember everything that happened And no I don’t need anything…except maybe another kiss”

 

Clarke laughed at her wife’s comment and the cheeky smile that graced her face. Leaning forward and down she obliged kissing Lexa lovingly once before sitting herself back up. As Clarke sat up Lexa’s doctor, Dr Richardson, entered the room a smile on his face as he looked at the women in the room as he approached the bed asking Lexa if she was okay to have a small conversation with him after which he would conduct some test. As Lexa nodded in agreement Clarke went to remove herself from the edge of the bed only to be stopped by Lexa holding onto her hand shuffling closer to her wife feeling and seeing the slight worry in Lexa’s face she placed her hand over Lexa’s gently stroking the top of Lexa’s hand with her free hand hoping to ease her mind a little with the action. She watched the doctor as he moved closer and began explaining everything to Lexa, every injury and mark on her body and how that would affect her within the next few months. How long each injury would take to heal provided she didn’t aggravate them in any way at all. Clarke listened intently to the doctor mentally taking in every single word he spoke as he looked from her to Lexa. Once he was finished she asked him a few questions of her own seeing that her wife was slightly overwhelmed by everything the doctor had said over the last thirty minutes. So instead of pushing Lexa to ask the doctor what she needed to, she asked the questions herself, she knew Lexa and she knew that pushing her right now wouldn’t be a great idea. A few more minutes passed by and the doctor answered every question Clarke threw at him, explaining the answer in detail. Once he answered the last question and learned Clarke had no further questions for him, he politely said his goodbyes telling Lexa and Clarke that he would be back to check on her in a few hours. Both women thanked the doctor as he walked out smiling softly at them.

 

Clarke looked at her wife smiling as she continued to hold onto her wife’s hand gently continuing to stroke it. Leaning forward she kissed her wife on the cheek “Are you okay with everything he said?”

 

“I think so yeah, it’s a lot to process really”

 

“I know it is baby, do you want me to explain some of it a little more”

 

Raven cleared her throat gently not making a lot of noise but making enough for Clarke and Lexa to know she was about to speak “Maybe just give her some time Clarke” She looked into Clarkes eyes making sure her sister in law knew she wasn’t being rude in any way “You know she needs time to process”

 

Clarke smiled at Raven knowing she was looking out for her sister and that if anyone knew Lexa better than her it was Raven. “Your right, We’ve got plenty of that…” She smiled down at her wife who was softly smiling back at her a blank expression on her face.

 

“Maybe you can go grab us a coffee….I know your dying for one and now Lexa is awake you can go get one….and you can get me a hot chocolate as well, and maybe take a break”

 

“I don’t need a break Rae, I’ve been waiting for Lex to wake up….you know that’s all I’ve wanted for weeks”

 

“I know that Clarke, and Lexa knows you love her more than anything….but your tired and Your not use to anyone if your overwhelmed and tired…just take twenty minutes, maybe go to the café and have a coffee with the twins and your parents, get away from this room and the blandness inside it….I’ll stay with Lexa…” Raven explained hoping Clarke would get the hidden message, the message that she wanted to be alone with Lexa, she knew her twin was holding back her feelings and that something wasn’t right but she also knew that Lexa wouldn’t say anything around her wife. Not wanting to add to whatever in her mind she thought Clarke had gone through whilst she was unconscious.

 

“I’m not sure, she’s only just…” Half way through her sentence Clarke noticed something in Raven’s expression that made her want to agree to leave. Knowing Raven could help Lexa now more than she could. But ultimately she didn’t want to abandon Lexa just as she’d woken up, so she decided to let Lexa decide “Would that be okay?”

 

“Yeah….that’s be fine…it….it can’t be fun stuck here all the time….take a few min…” Lexa stopped herself as a sharp breath sent a shock wave of pain through her body. So much so she had to force herself to stop speaking so the pain didn’t register on her face for Clarke to see. Taking a small breath in she continued “Take a few minutes to yourself…go get a real coffee, I know how much you love those…” She finished with a smirk as she watched Clarke move a little closer to her

 

“Are you sure baby? I don’t care about all that I can stay right where I am if you want me to”

 

“I’m more sure Clarke….give yourself a break, go sit with the twins outside this room for…..” Lexa paused again needing to stop speaking this time through a lack of breath. With every breath she took she could feel the tightness of her stomach and she knew exactly why it felt like that “I know you probably haven’t seen them in a while, not outside this room anyway…..so please, for me, just go have thirty minutes of normality in a hospital canteen…”

 

“Well when you put it like that…” Clarke faked a smile leaning forward and pecking Lexa on the lips. She could see her wife was in pain, but she could also see that she was hiding it from her. And she knew better than to push it, she’d leave that to Raven for now. Pecking Lexa on the lips a few more times she whispered against Lexa’s lips “okay….I love you”

 

“I love you too…...don’t be too long”

 

“I won’t I promise” Clarke smiled back at her wife removing herself from the side of the bed, walking around and grabbing her purse from her bag before standing back up and walking towards the door, stopping once she reached it she looked at her wife smiling softly before disappearing into the hallway.

 

The room was silent apart from the low beeping of the heart monitor that was still attached to Lexa’s chest, instead of interrupting or looking at Lexa, Raven gave her sister a few minutes to herself, to think and process everything before she spoke to her. About four or five minutes must have passed by before she even looked at her twin again, when she did she could see that the mask that Lexa was holding whilst Clarke and everyone else was in the room had completely disappeared, Lexa’s face was filled with anger, sadness, fear and about every emotion that a human could feel at a time like this. Standing up she walked over to the bed still not saying a word, knowing she didn’t need to at this moment in time, she continued until she was at the edge of the bed. As she stops moving Lexa looks up at her sadly smiling, all those emotions still clear on her face, softly smiling at her sister she gently scooted herself onto the bed wrapping her left arm around Lexa’s shoulder pulling her into a comforting hug. She felt Lexa’s body relax into hers as small and soft sobs escaped her sister’s body, tears of her own running down Raven’s cheeks as she held onto Lexa the same way Lexa had to her when they were younger….God how she missed those times more, things used to be so simple back then and now they were anything but….

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo what does everyone think?.... Next chapter will see Roan get his comeuppance as well as Lexa dealying with her emotions and much more….As you can tell I’m not giving away too much on the next chapter as it is the FINAL chapter of this part of the story at least….I WILL be doing a follow up to this story when it will be set I haven’t decided but it will be happening about a month or two after the Final chapter is posted :-) I AM ALSO going to be doing a OCTAVEN based story because I love them as a couple, so yeah…Hope you all enjoyed this chapter and as always feel free to review or inbox me personally….but until next time peeps and peepettes stay safe, and keep fanficing…


	34. My Forever & Eternity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The FINAL Chapter of Music Never Sleeps.....what will happen next and how will it all end?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo It has been sooooooooooooo much longer than I planned lol, I'd say life got in the way, which is true to some extent but the main reason for the delay is basically I couldn't figure out how to end it and got discouraged slightly to finish it BUT got back into it thanks to the lovely snow here in the UK and managed to finish the chapter today, I did want to finish it differently but as I wrote it went a different way so I went with it...I haven't edited it or check spelling yet so I apologise if there are any errors...But anyways I just wanna say THANK YOU to everyone who has left a comment, so many of you have been so supportive and kind that it made finishing this story even more important than before, so THANK YOU ALL for that, and I hope you all enjoy this final instalment :-) Fair Warning this is a LONG CHAPTER in Total nearly 30,000 words....
> 
> There is a lot in there so don't be afraid to take a break lol but as I wrote it everything seemed to fit, and looking over it I couldn't see anything I wanted to delete as I felt some bits just were needed for light fun lol but hey you guys judge and feel free to skip certain parts if you like...But I'll stop typing now and let you all read on...
> 
> HOPE YOU ENJOY :-) :-)

 CHAPTER THIRTY PART THREE- MY FOREVER AND ETERNITY

** Monday 10th April 2017 12:30 **

Raven and Lexa sat on the hospital bed, Raven still had her left arm wrapped around her sister’s shoulders holding onto her as she realised all her emotions. They must have been sat like that for about ten minutes before Raven looked down at her twin seeing the tears that now stained her cheeks, reaching up with her right hand she wiped at Lexa’s cheeks then wiping the moisture onto her jeans. Still she didn’t speak giving Lexa the time to process what she needed to, she listened, and she waited just like Lexa always did with her when they were younger. All those times their mother got so drunk she could barely see straight, yet was able to pick an argument with their father, accusing him of anything and everything she could, that would most of the time turn into a fight, a fight that would cause Raven to go into herself and not talk at all, and all Lexa would do was wrap her arm around her shoulders and hug her until she was ready to talk. So now that was what she was going to do for Lexa. She wasn’t sure how much time had passed by since she’d climbed onto the hospital bed to comfort her twin sister, but the next voice that filled the room was Lexa’s;

 

“I was scared” Raven looked down slightly at her twin, not speaking knowing Lexa needed to get things off her chest. “I thought….” Lexa stopped as she struggled to get the words out, holding in her emotions so much her face began to go red as if it was going explode “I thought I was gonna die Rae”. Raven remained silent turning her head a little more placing a soothing kiss on her sister’s forehead, slowly she removed her right arm from around Lexa’s shoulders placing it between them and taking his sister’s right hand in her left, just like Lexa used to do with her when they were younger, just as Lexa used to Raven interlocked their fingers as Lexa leant her head completely against her shoulder. “The whole time I was lying there on the floor all I could think of was that I was going to die…that I’d leave the twins and Clarke alone…I felt so helpless and weak, I’ve never felt that before….you know even when we were kids I never felt that helpless, I always had a means of controlling what I was feeling, I always knew that if we were together then we could survive anything…even our parents…but what he did to me…” Lexa paused as Raven heard the anger seeping into her voice, that was the scariest and saddest thing for Raven, she’d never heard that mix of emotion in Lexa’s voice, not since they were in college. Still she kept quite pushing her own anger towards Roan as she let Lexa continue “I couldn’t get up, or move….I couldn’t do anything but lay there and hope someone saved me…It was like I wasn’t in my body anymore, that nothing I tried mattered and I was just being forced to watch everything unfold without a choice in it what so ever, I think that was the worst part for me….it wasn’t feeling the knife cut through my body or the punches he rained down on me…it was feeling helpless, I haven’t felt that since Clarke kicked me out…and even then it wasn’t that bad…it was like no matter how hard I tried to will myself to live, to stay awake…for the twins, for Clarke…for you, Cos and TJ…I just couldn’t do it…It just makes me feel like one massive major fucking failure…”

 

“Lex…. you’re not a failure…”

 

“I couldn’t hold on Rae, what does that make me?”

 

“It doesn’t make you anything Lex…. you tried, you held on for as long as you could…”

 

“But…”

 

“But nothing Alexa….your body gave up, you didn’t…you fought for your family and for your life until your body went into shut down mode….and I’m glad it did…” Raven paused as she felt her sister’s head move against her shoulder slightly “There isn’t anything in the world I wouldn’t do for you Lex, I promised that I’d look after Clarke and the twins if the unthinkable happened, and I meant every single word of what I said…because it wasn’t the hardest thing….I could see how hard you were fighting to stay with me, how hard you were fighting not to fall asleep, not to give in to the pain and fear that you were feeling….and seeing that only made it worse, if I’d have lost you and the last thing I saw in your eyes was pain, I never would have been able to get over that…I can handle the waiting around and the possibility of you not remembering me or anyone else, I could handle every possible scenario as long as I didn’t have to see that pain in your eyes again, as long as I didn’t have to see you say goodbye to me in your head…” Raven stopped talking as tears ran down her cheeks as she re-felt the feelings she did as she was fighting to save her twin sisters life weeks ago. “I knew that as soon as you closed your eyes that you weren’t in pain anymore, and it gave me some relief…it didn’t stop me worrying about you being okay, or make anything any easier to handle but you weren’t in pain anymore and that was more comfort than I can explain…” Raven smiled as Lexa squeezed the hand that was interlocked with her own, she felt her sister turn a little and the next thing she knew Lexa was slowly and carefully wiping away her tears, and placing a gentle kiss on her forehead just like when they were younger. The action caused Raven to let out a small laugh, as a questioning frown appeared on Lexa’s face Raven explained “Even when you’re in a hospital bed in pain you’re still looking after me”

 

“Natural instinct I suppose” Lexa paused as Raven nodded her head in agreement at her words, both of them remaining silent for a second before Lexa rested her head as it was and held onto her sister a little more, seconds turned into minutes before Lexa decided to ask a question she’d wondered about since she woke up, in fact one of several questions she wondered about “I need to ask you something, and I need you to be honest…” Raven softly nodded her head in agreement “How has Clarke been handling all of this?”

 

“I don’t know…Okay I suppose…she’s been sketching a lot, I don’t think she knows that I’ve seen her sketching… she mostly does it when I’m napping or when I would go get some fresh air or get us drinks… I think it’s her way of processing things without blaming herself… when we were waiting outside the studio trying to get inside to see if you were okay she said that what happened to you was her fault, I told her it wasn’t but I got a feeling that she still blamed herself even when we knew you had come through the surgery… she’s only just started talking to me more over the last few days, I think maybe that’s a sign that she’s starting to understand that nothing Roan did was her fault…”

 

“Has she mentioned him since that day?”

 

“No, she just talks about you and the twins and everything but him and what he did really….I think she’s still processing… we both know there’s only one person she ever really talks to about her true feelings and that’s you…and until today she’s not been able to talk to you…”

 

“I’ll talk to her and make sure she knows none of this was her fault….” There was another bout of silence between them before Lexa asked another question “Did they catch him?”

 

“No…Once he did his damage he escaped out the back entrance and managed to get to his car, since then the police have been keeping an eye out and actively looking for him but nothing, they have a police car outside Nia’s house, they even searched it and the restaurant but nothing yet…they tried all three of his friends and every other place they could think of but they haven’t found any sign of him…”

 

“Do they think he’s dangerous to others?”

 

“No, the only person they think he’s a danger to is you…so don’t be surprised if once the police find out your awake you get an escort at your door 24/7”

 

“I’m slightly surprise there isn’t one there already”

 

“well you have Abby to thank for that…she talked to the police and had them liaise with hospital security, they agreed no armed guard was needed and that they police would patrol the area of the hospital every hour to deter Roan if he was thinking of coming here, and along with that they have his picture plaster on every security check point around the hospital as well as wanted pictures on every notice board in the hospital, it doesn’t say he’s wanted for stabbing you but it says wanted so I think people get the message…and if they see him well he’s gonna have a hell of a lot of problems on his hands…and that’s just from me”

 

“Tell me you didn’t go after him?”

 

“I didn’t…Clarke wouldn’t let me…”

 

“But you tried too?” When Raven didn’t answer Lexa got the answer she needed “Raven…why would you try and go after him?”

 

“BECAUSE HE NEARLY KILLED YOU” Raven shouted out not releasing her hold on Lexa or moving an inch from her place on the bed, the only thing changing being more tears rushing down her cheeks as her right hand clenched in anger at the thought of Roan, as she gritted her teeth she explained “I was so angry at him…you nearly died, the one person in my life that has always been there when I was struggling or whenever for whatever I needed them for wasn’t there…I didn’t know how to control it Lexa, I just wanted to find him and beat the hell out of him for trying to take you away from me….”

 

“You know that’s not how to deal with things Rae…how many times have I told you that?”

 

“I know Lex…and I get it but in that moment I couldn’t control it, and once Clarke calmed me down I realised how stupid it was of me to fly off like that, I just couldn’t stop myself, usually I have you to calm me back down but I didn’t and I knew I didn’t which made it a million times harder for me to calm down, everytime I thought about calming down I remembered you were lying in this hospital bed because of him and I just couldn’t calm down…not until Clarke started talking about Zachary….”

 

“And you calmed down?”

 

“Yeah instantly almost…. I mean I was still angry and I still wanted to kill Roan, but I just couldn’t imagine leaving Zachary…being away from him now is almost unbearable but not being able to see him whenever I wanted or even worse being taken away from him forever by Roan, it was unthinkable…I just couldn’t do that to him…” Raven paused for a second before softly adding “Or Octavia”

 

“I know…I get it…all those years when we were younger I only really had one anchor holding me down, and that was you…when we got older that got stronger, yeah we had Cos and TJ, and Clarke and Octavia but there’s something about the twins that anchors more than anything else ever has…its different and amazing…and great…and a whole bunch of other feelings that I can’t even express…”

 

“I get it Lex…I know that feeling and it’s pretty much indescribable…. all I know is that I’d die for him…and kill for him and do pretty much anything to make sure that he never has to feel what we did, or go through any pain or unhappiness…no matter what it takes I’ll do it for him…”

 

“Yeah…it’s amazing and terrifying all at the same time”

 

“It is…” Raven concurred moving her head slightly to look at her twin sister she gently kissed the top of Lexa’s head, insanely happy just to be talking to her sister right now, but she couldn’t help feeling worried for her sister slightly and she knew Lexa only needed one more person to say she didn’t give up for Lexa to believe it, and that was Clarke. She knew that she had to make sure that her sister wouldn’t back out of telling Clarke how she felt “Promise me something Lexa….”

 

“I’ll promise depending on what I’m promising Rae”

 

“I want you to promise me that you’ll tell Clarke how your feeling? Not now but you totally should…but I mean how you feel about what happened…I know you Lexa…and I know that sometimes you get lost in your head…I told you what I feel and I know you believe me but I also know your thinking about the possibility that I’m lying or just telling you what you want to hear…so I need you to promise me that you’ll talk to Clarke and tell her what you felt in that moment and let her help you through it, because I’m sure that it’d help her as well, and maybe just maybe she’ll talk to you too…maybe it’ll be a little easier for you to talk to her…so do you promise me?”

 

“I promise you…”

 

“Twin promise me”

 

“Wow twin promise…bringing out the big guns…” Raven didn’t speak but Lexa could tell from her slight tensing up and the feeling of her twins jaw clenching against the top of her head that Raven wasn’t impressed with her answer “Okay…no joking at all…. I twin promise you that I will talk to Clarke about how I’m feeling and was feeling in that moment…”

 

“Thank you”

 

“Your welcome little sis”

 

Raven let out a small laugh at Lexa’s words she was only 2 minutes younger but their whole lives Lexa had always been the big sister to her, and would always pull the big sister card on her when she was holding something back or hiding something from her. And it always brought her more comfort than anything else, it didn’t upset her or make her angry it just made her feel safe and like she was somewhere she could never be hurt. As she got lost in her thoughts she felt Lexa sink into her a little more her arms holding onto her sister a little more, both enjoying their time alone before Clarke and the twins came back with Jake and Abby. Minutes passed by as they both kept their eyes closed relaxing the best they could, enjoying the silence until they both heard arguing in the distance, both of the opened their eyes at the same time looking in the direction the noise was coming from they listened as the voices got louder and closer, both of their faces contorted as the carefully manoeuvred themselves to look at each other in slight confusion as they both realised they knew the voices;

 

“I don’t care”

 

“We have to go back Cos...Mom and Dad are gonna be really mad at us…”

 

“I SAID I DON’T CARE I WANNA SEE…” The voice stopped as Lexa and Raven’s eyes landed on their younger siblings, Costia and TJ, both Costia and TJ stopped in their tracks as they’d entered the hospital room seeing their older siblings in front of them “Lexi” Costia softly let out a massive smile breaking onto her face as her and TJ rushed forward without thinking, engulfing Lexa and Raven a hug both being as careful as they knew they had to be.

 

* * *

 

** Hospital Canteen-12:43 **

Clarke slowly walked into the hospital canteen it’d been nearly twenty minutes since she’d left Lexa’s hospital room, leaving the woods twins to talk over whatever they were going to talk over, she knew Lexa needed to unload her feelings and she also knew that Raven was most likely the only person that would be able to get Lexa to open up quickly. Once she’d left the hospital room she went outside for some fresh air before she called Octavia up telling her best friend how Lexa had woken up, they ended up talking about everything that had happened and how Clarke was feeling, Clarke lied saying she was fine and Octavia made her best friend promise to tell Lexa what she was really feeling. Clarke promised and they began talking about the twins and how happy they were when Lexa woke up, and how Oscar shouted at his Grandma before instantly apologising without being told, after a while they both agreed to end that call, with Octavia telling Clarke that she was going to get Zachary ready and head over to the hospital to see his Mama and Auntie Lexa, as well as his Auntie Clarke and his cousins. As she’d ended the call Clarke placed her phone back in her pocket heading back inside and walking to the canteen.

 

As she looked around trying to find her parents and her children she heard Olivia’s voice loudly yell out “MOMMY” Making her smile instantly, she turned in the direction of the voice seeing her daughter running towards her, once Olivia was close enough she lifted her daughter of the floor hugging her tightly “Hi Mommy”

 

“Hi princess…so where are we sitting?”

 

“Over there, Mommy…” Olivia pointed in the direction she’d just come from, Clarke noticed Oscar and her parents sitting at a table, Oscar was sitting next to his Grandma excitedly waving at her with one chocolate covered hand as his other hand held a piece of chocolate cake in it, his face covered in the same chocolate cake he was holding. The image made her laugh softly as Olivia continued talking “Quick Mommy…before Oscar eats all the cake…” Clarke laughed placing her daughter on the ground she took her hand both of them rushing over to the table. Olivia walked around to the empty seat next to her Grandpa, but instead of sitting down she just waited next to the seat, looking at her mommy she softly and sweetly asked “Can you sit with me please Mommy?”

 

Clarke smiled at her daughter’s utter cuteness right now moving over to Olivia she smiled back at her “Of course I can princess” Lifting her daughter in the air she sat down on the chair placing Olivia on her lap, she noticed the happy smile that appeared on her daughter’s face as she leant back against her. As she hugged Olivia she noticed her Mom and Dad giving her a curious look “Lexa and Rae needed some alone time” She explained getting a small nod of understanding from them both. “So Dad, what sugary madness have you been feeding my babies?”

 

“Hey, I’m innocent this time…your mother was the one that got them all of this” Jake responded holding his hands in the air before motioning to the three chocolate cakes and two vanilla milkshakes along with the two bowls of apple slices and cherry yoghurts on the table, along with two coffees that were Jake and Abby’s.

 

“My petal here was hungry and when we got here my little flower wanted something to eat as well…so I treated them because they’ve been really good for me and Grandpa…”

 

“Well they’ve been good for us not so much for the teachers” Jake responded not thinking through what he said

 

“What does that mean dad?” Clarke asked intrigued by her dad’s words as Olivia leant forward and continued eating her cake

 

“Nothing just something their teacher said to me”

 

“What teacher?”

 

“Mrs Comb”

 

“And what exactly did she say?”

 

“She said that Oscar was being a little distracting in class…” Jake badly lied having received a death stare from his wife

 

“Your lying dad…even though Mom is giving you ‘the stare’ I need the true”

 

“Not right now Clarke…. I’ll tell you later I promise but right now can you just enjoy that your wife is awake and you’re having some quality eating time with the twins”

 

Clarke thought about it for a second, thinking to herself that no matter what it was it couldn’t be that bad if the twins were still in school and if she hadn’t been called herself about the incident. “Fine” She huffed out, she didn’t have much chance to overthink it as Olivia moved against her chest turning and looking up at her smiling as she held her cake in the air

 

“Do you want some Mommy?”

 

“Its okay baby you have it”

 

“You can have some Mommy I don’t minds…” Olivia sweetly smiled placing the cake back on the plate she carefully pulled a piece off holding it for her Mommy “Here Mommy…have this bit, cause I don’t wants it…”

 

“Are you sure about that Princess? I know how much you love Chocolate Cake”

 

“I’m really sure Mommy…. you love chocolate cake too…and I want you to have some” Olivia smiled as she held the cake to her Mommy’s face a little more

 

“Okay then…thank you princess” Clarke just managed to get her response out as Olivia held the cake to her mouth, smiling she gently held the piece of cake with one hand, carefully biting the cake in her daughter’s hand, taking the piece completely she placed it in her mouth eating it with a loud mmmmm and a smile on her face, the noise making Olivia giggle softly at her. Once she finished chewing and swallowed the cake she placed a kiss on her daughter’s cheek thanking her again “Thank you so much princess that was delicious”

 

“Your welcome Mommy”

 

“I’ll get you a coffee” Jake softly added smiling at his family and mainly Clarke as he looked at her getting up and walking over to the counter to get a peace offering of sorts for his daughter. Clarke continued talking to Olivia until her dad returned a minute or so later with her coffee placing it in front of her but not close enough for Olivia to knock it over. As he placed the coffee, Abby picked up one of the yoghurts and one of the spoons placing it next to the coffee so Clarke knew it was for her

 

“Thank you” She softly said looking at them both gratefully, reaching forward she grabbed the spoon and yoghurt internally thankful for it, she had to admit it she was beyond starving right now. And she needed to eat now especially if she was going to pour her heart out to her wife later. Opening the yoghurt she began eating it noticing Olivia watching her every move almost longingly, looking down at the four-year-old she asked, “Would you like some princess?”

 

“Is it strawberries Mommy?”

 

“No baby it isn’t…So would you like some?”

 

“Yes, please mommy…if that’s okay”

 

“Of course, it is” She smiled carefully picking up some yoghurt on her spoon before feeding her daughter the spoonful carefully. As she did, she looked over at Oscar seeing her son’s chocolate covered face she laughed “Did you enjoy that cake Oz?”

 

Oscar let out a laugh as he looked at his Mommy and nodded “It was delicious Mommy…grandma had two pieces”

 

“Oh, did she? Well Grandma loves chocolate cake, doesn’t she?”

 

“Yeah…she loves it lots and lots…just like you Mommy”

 

“Well between us I think that’s where I get my love of chocolate from?”

 

“What does that mean Mommy?”

 

“What does what mean my prince?”

 

“You said that was where you got your chocolate love from? What does that mean Mommy?”

 

“You didn’t understand what Mommy said?”

 

“No I didn’t…..sorry mommy”

 

“You don’t need to be sorry baby boy…you want me to explain it?”

 

“Yes please”

 

“Well you see…” Clarke paused as she thought about the best way to explain what she meant to her son without confusing him “You are made up of two people”

 

“You and Mama?”

 

“Exactly…and as a result you are like me in some ways and like Mama in other ways…meaning you take after or get things from Mama and some from me…” Clarke continued explaining as her son nodded his head saying he understood as he continuing to intently listen to what she was saying. “Like Olivia gets her allergy of strawberries from Mama…and you both get your eye colour from Mama…and you both get that little blond tint in your hair from me…and you get your cute little snore from me according to Mama…and loads of other things to…so just like you get all those things from me and Mama…I got some of my habits and features from Grandma and Grandpa…so I was saying that I got my love for Chocolate Cake from Grandma, does that make sense?” She asked realising that she’d just said a whole bunch of things that her son may not have understood.

 

“Yeah…like how you really like yoghurts and I really like yoghurts Mommy?”

 

“Yeah”

 

“I understand” Oscar smiled brightly before turning his attention to his Grandma as he began eating one of the bowls of apple slices “Maybe I like Chocolate cake because you like it Grandma…Mommy got it from you and I gots it from Mommy…”

 

“That is very smart thinking petal”

 

“Mama says I’m really smart Grandma”

 

“And Mama is right…when we go back to see her you can tell her what you learned”

 

Oscar let out a massive gasp looking at his Grandma before launching himself at her “That’s the best idea Grandma, thank you” The three adults laughed at the little boys words as Clarke continued to eat her yoghurt giving Olivia the occasional spoonful until there was nothing left, then turning her attention to her coffee on the table, the five of them falling into a conversation about who was alike in what way, with the twins asking loads of questions about who that got some of their traits from. The whole time they were talking, the same question was in the back of Clarke’s mind, ‘what hadn’t her father told her?’

 

* * *

 

  ** _Raven and Octavia January 2014_**

_Raven and Octavia were laying in their bed together, wrapped in each other’s arms after a few solid hours of love making. They’d spent the whole day with Clarke, Lexa and the twins and something about seeing Raven caring for her niece and nephew and being some maternal did something for Octavia, she wasn’t sure what it was, maybe it was more about her being able to see them with children in the future, whatever it was it made her want to make love to Raven all night long. Once they were home it was game on and they made their way from the living room through the hallway until they finally reached their bedroom and after a session against the wall and then on the floor they finally made it to the bed itself. Hours later they were both naked and covered in sweat from head to toe with nothing more than a thin sheet of bedding covering their waists as they held onto each other._

_“I can’t believe how cute the twins are”_

_“Is it a little weird that we’re talking about our one and a half year old niece and nephew whilst we’re naked?” Raven asked causing them both to laugh a little_

_“No, I don’t think it is…now if we were still going it would be very very weird….and insanely creepy and worrying…” Octavia responded leaning into Raven and capturing her lips, humming contently into the kiss. Pulling back she smiled up at her “I can’t believe how grown up their getting”_

_“Its crazy…did you hear Olivia call my name out?”_

_“I did, she loves her Auntie Rae Rae…so does Oscar though…” She paused for a second as she thought to herself “In fact I’m sure all children love you…”_

_“Who doesn’t love me though?”_

_“That’s true…everyone loves you”_

_“So about children?”_

_“What about them exactly baby?”_

_“Do you want children…with me I mean…is that something you can see us doing in the future?”_

_“I don’t know…you changed the way I see a lot of things, when I was younger I never wanted children, especially with everything my dad put me and Bellamy through, my parents’ divorce, my Mom remarrying and having Ontari…I just never wanted my life to be that messy…but we’re different, your different…I feel complete when I’m with you and I think I want children…not right now but in the future I can definitely see us with a little family of our own…what about you?”_

_“I one hundred percent want a family with you…I have since the first time we kissed probably even before that, I love everything about you…I know that you think your imperfect and that there are things you need to change about yourself but there honestly isn’t one thing I’d change about you, the way you smile at me brightens up my day, and when you hug me after a bad day it makes everything okay like nothing that happened even mattered because I’m with you…I didn’t think I could ever feel like that with someone…I didn’t think I could trust someone with myself as much as I trust you…I know we’ve had good times as well as bad but I can’t imagine being without you for a minute let alone any longer…you make me feel complete…”_

_Raven finished her words looking down at Octavia she could see the tears on her girlfriend’s eyes “I don’t even know what to say” Octavia managed to choke out as she bit her bottom lip releasing it as she leant up capturing Raven’s lips with her own, as they broke apart Raven felt a flutter of butterflies in her stomach as she added on to her previous words;_

_“I mean every word O, you are the love of my life…I can’t imagine being without you…” Then it hit her like a tonne of bricks, all the words she’d been trying to think of to say in her proposal were all falling from her lips, so naturally that she didn’t have to think about it, she just opened up her heart and let those words come rushing through. “I don’t ever wanna know what it feels like to lose you…I don’t think I’d be able to cope physically or mentally…your like air to me Octavia…” As she looked down at Octavia she could see how intently and lovingly her girlfriend was looking at her. Before she changed her mind, she spoke “Close your eyes for me…” And just like that without even asking why Octavia did so, she closed her eyes like her girlfriend asked her and waited to see where it led, Raven reached into the drawer on her right hand side thankful she wasn’t too far away from it, reaching inside it she quickly found the small box she’d hidden underneath a bunch of notepads and pens and a whole bunch of junk she kept in that drawer incase she got inspired in the night. Holding onto the box she lifted it out closing the drawer quietly she brought her arm to rest on her right thigh as she adjusted herself slightly “Open them…” She softly said, and before Octavia had a chance to process what was in Ravens hand she added “Will you marry me?” She saw the tears instantly began to rush from Octavia’s eyes down her cheeks_

_“Are you being serious?” When Raven nodded her head Octavia leant forward crashing their lips passionately together pulling back she looked deep into Ravens eyes as she softly whispered against her lips “Yes I’ll marry you” No further words we’re needed as she crashed their lips together passionately rolling them until she was on top of Raven straddling her now Fiancée the box in Raven’s hand falling to the side and completely forgotten about right now, all she was thinking about and all she cared about in this moment was showing Raven how much she loved her._

* * *

 

** Lexa’s Hospital Room-12:58 **

Costia and TJ had been hugging their shocked sisters for over ten minutes none of them able to say a word or even think about what was going on. The main things Lexa and Raven were feeling were happiness and shock, they had no idea that their younger siblings were planning on coming to see Lexa in the hospital. Raven had spoken to them only a day before telling them any update she had on Lexa, which at the time was nothing that they hadn’t already been told by their older sister. At first neither of the twins pushed their younger siblings to break their hug or to talk but now they were both wondering what was going on, and they had already heard a small bit of their conversation and it didn’t sound good from what they heard. Exchanging a knowingly look, Lexa and Raven both nodded softly at each other before they both gently broke the hug, pushing TJ and Costia backwards so there was space between them that would allow them to see if they were being lied to. Raven decided to ask first clearing her throat she looked at her younger siblings and asked;

 

“So, what’s going on you two?”

 

Costia and TJ looked at Raven and Lexa seeing the serious expressions that covered their faces, they looked nervously at each other until Costia stood up straight buffed her chest and with a determined look spoke “We wanted to see Lexa”

 

“And the rest of that explanation is?” Raven instantly asked knowing her little sister was hiding something

 

“Mom and dad wouldn’t bring us…then they said that it wasn’t our business and we shouldn’t worry about it because it would all be okay”

 

“And how did you end up here then?” Raven closed her eyes and sighed, the look on Costia and TJ’s face was pretty much all the explanation that she needed “Please tell me that you didn’t come without their permission?”

 

“Okay”

 

“Okay what Costia?”

 

“You said not to tell you so I won’t”

 

“Don’t get smart with me Costia…tell us what happened now”

****

“I wanted to see Lexa, they wouldn’t let me so I came on my own”

 

“From DC?”

 

“Yeah…I told TJ not to come with me but he didn’t listen, then he spent the whole journey telling me how stupid I was and how much trouble I was gonna be in”

 

“Because you are you idiot, and now so am I” TJ interrupted his anger was clear but whether or not it was aimed at Costia or not neither Raven or Lexa could tell. “Now there’s gonna be so much trouble…WHY DO YOU ALWAYS CAUSE TROUBLE?” He shouted at his older sister, his hands balling into fists as the 11-year-old’s whole body stiffened and his face angerly looked at his sister, not one ounce of calm in him.

 

Seeing her little brother’s anger Raven stepped forward grabbing his fists firmly and looking directly at him “Hey, this isn’t the time or place to be losing control of your temper, our sister is in a hospital bed after a massive ordeal…she doesn’t need this…” Looking to Lexa for a second seeing the thankful nod, she looked to Costia seeing the younger brunette was slightly shocked and scared “Your gonna come outside with me and we’ll talk okay?” She said looking back at her little brother.

 

“Why am I being pulled aside why not her?”

 

“Because she isn’t shouting and disturbing Lexa...”

 

“Well I don’t want to go outside”

 

“Fine then we’ll walk around the hospital and then go to the canteen when your calm enough…Lexa doesn’t need this right now…so no more arguments, you’re coming with me” Raven firmly told her younger brother, wrapping her arm around his shoulders using the arm to control her brother’s body as they walked towards the door. Looking back she looked at Costia firmly saying “Keep an eye on Lexa and talk…it helps believe me” Without a further word she smiled at Lexa and turned back to TJ continuing to walk out of the hospital room turning left and beginning to walk with her younger brother.

 

After a few minutes of silence and Costia staring blankly at her, Lexa held her right arm in the air motioning her hand for her little sister to come and join her, when Costia didn’t she softly added “Come give your big sister a proper hug before I change my mind and decide to grill you about all that…” Costia let out a small smile before moving forward and climbing onto the bed carefully hugging her sister, cuddling gently into her side as she closed her eyes to the feeling of Lexa running her fingers through her hair.

 

* * *

 

  _Flashback-Saturday February 13th, 2011_

_Clarke and Lexa were in the bedroom Lexa and Raven shared at their Auntie Anya and their fathers house, to say the living situation was a little weird to explain to people was an understatement. Lexa and Raven had gotten used to it and would introduce Anya as their stepmom instead of their Aunt, it was just easier and involved less talking and explaining. And it especially made things easier at times like this week, when their mom and stepdad were in town and were spending loads of time at the house, their mom told them that it was because she wasn’t to repair her relationship with Anya, her mom’s half-sister, but she knew it was because they wanted to keep Anya and Gustus sweet for when they needed a babysitter, so they could go get drunk without having to pick up Costia and TJ. Her and Raven had taken to only spending time with their Mom when they were together, and their siblings were there, and their mom didn’t seem to care anyway so everyone was pleased and somewhat happy. Especially her and Raven, they got to see their younger brother and sister, and they didn’t have to spend time with someone who was never a mother to them anyway. And it allowed them both to still be able to spend time with their girlfriends, and thankfully today Raven was at Octavia’s allowing her and Clarke to have the bedroom all to themselves. They had started off studying and completely homework that they needed, they managed to get through half of their homework before they looked at each other smirking, those smirks turned into a peck on the lips which almost instantly led to a full on make out session, that was almost thirty minutes ago and now things were starting to get a little more heated between them as Lexa’s hands made their way underneath the shirt of the blonde underneath her, at the same time Clarke’s hands found their way to Lexa’s jeans waistband, her hands gripping onto the denim material, as the kiss deepened Lexa pushed against Clarke’s chest creating space between them seeing the pout Clarke was giving her she looked down at the blonde in the eyes before continuing;_

_“Clarke, we’re getting a little distracted from the task at hand”_

_“But it’s been so long since we made love…”_

_“It’s been two weeks”_

_Clarke let an almost devilish smirk as she quickly switched her and Lexa’s positions, so she was straddling the brunette her hands resting firmly on Lexa’s hips as she looked into her eyes lustfully “Exactly my point” She didn’t miss the smirk that graced Lexa’s face as she looked up at her “Are you saying you don’t want to?”_

_“I didn’t say that exactly, did I?”_

_“No, you didn’t…. but you did say we were getting distracted”_

_“We are…we’re meant to be completing our homework Clarke…Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day babe are you seriously saying you can’t wait another day”_

_“Well No I can’t wait one more day, and as for our homework I am doing it…you see it’s my Biology homework, and I’m researching the anatomy of a female teenager…”_

_“Research huh?”_

_“It’s a very important thing to know about Lexa…” Clarke smirked leaning down until she was face to face with her girlfriend her lips hoovering over Lexa’s “Do you really want me to stop? ….to get off you completely and go back to doing my school work? …”_

_“Well that depends…” Lexa responded her attention fully on Clarke’s lips_

_“On?”_

_“How much you need to complete?”_

_“I’ve done three quarters of it…only a few more paragraphs and I’m done…but right now I can’t think about anything but you…it’s not my fault you distract me Lexa... If anyone is to blame, it’s you…”_

_“Me?” Lexa asked amused at the sentence, seeing the flash of playfulness in Clarke’s eyes, softly biting the right corner of her bottom lip she smiled up at Clarke responding, “Well I guess if I’m the reason your distracted I should really make up for it…right?” Clarke eagerly but softly nodded her head at Lexa, without another word or thought she meant up capturing Clarke’s lips with her own, both of them falling back into the make out session they had been engaged in minutes before, their hands roaming all over each other’s bodies, underneath clothing. Clarke’s hands had just connected with the button of Lexa’s jeans ready to unbutton them when there was a knock on the bedroom door that made them both jolt apart quickly “Who is it?” Lexa’s shouted her mind focused only on reconnecting her lips with Clarke’s_

_“IT’S ME” A small voice shouted through the door as a knock continued_

_“Costia?” Lexa cautiously asked her attention shifting from Clarke to the door back to Clarke then back to the door_

_“YES…ITS ME LEXI…”_

_Lexa looked up at her girlfriend smiling brightly as Clarke knowingly removed herself from her girlfriend’s waist, laying on the bed and watching as Lexa excitedly jumped off the bed and jogged over to the door opening it wanting to see her little sister. As soon as the door opened Costia came running into the room jumping up onto her sister and hugging her tightly "I missed you loads Cos..." Lexa let out as she squeezed her little sister peppering kisses on Costia’s face, hearing a giggle escape the 7-year olds mouth as she did, with her arms holding onto Costia firmly, Lexa adjusted herself and pulled Costia back slightly so they were looking at each other "What are you doing here?"_

_"Me, Tristan & Mommy came to see Auntie Anya"_

_"You did?_

_"Yeah and now they are talking loads and loads, I just wanted to see you Lexi...because I missed you lots and lots"_

_"You did?"_

_"Yeah...where's Rae Rae?"_

_“Am I not good enough for you now little one?”_

_“Noooooooooooo…” Costia responded laughing softly her head falling back in the air slightly as she laughed, lifting her head back up she looked at her older sister and continued “But I wanted to say goodbye…and I miss her loads too Lexi…”_

_“Okay then…well Rae is with her girlfriend today…”_

_“Octavia?”_

_“Yep that’s the one…they are spending a little time together, but I can call her and ask her to come back to see you if you like?”_

_“Yes, please Lexi”_

_“Ok then you go sit on the bed whilst I call Rae…you can tell Clarke all about what you’ve been upto…”_

_Costia let out a small gasp as she looked over at the bed seeing the blonde sitting up crossed legged on the bed looking over at the two brunettes. Smiling brightly Costia shimmied down Lexa’s chest a little before Lexa placed her carefully on the floor watching as Costia ran over to the bed, jumping up onto the bed with ease she sat next to Clarke giggling softly as she looked up at her “Hi Clarke…I’m sorry I didn’t see you…”_

_“Its okay Cos…you were all excited and happy”_

_“I was…” Costia laughed out bouncing on the bed and jumping onto Clarke’s lap sitting so she was facing the blonde. Clarke smiled watching as the little girls face filled with a smile and her hands found their way to her cheeks gently tapping on them as she smiled at her "What were you and Lexi doing Clarke?"_

_“We were studying loads and loads” She answered not missing the smirk on Lexa’s face as she spoke on the phone “Then we got a little bored, so we had a little cuddle time…”_

_“Can I have a cuddle please?”_

_“Um of course you can munchkin” Clarke laughed out wrapping her arms around her girlfriend’s little sister making the little girl giggle into the hug. As the little girl pulled back after a few minutes Clarke made a funny face at her before suddenly launching a tickle attack on the younger brunette, carefully rolling Costia onto the bed and continuing her attack as the little girl called out for her big sister to help her. Lexa just laughed on looking at her little sister and girlfriends interaction. Minutes passed by before she finally swooped forward lifting her little sister out of Clarke’s grasp, lifting her onto her chest as the little girl gripped onto her tightly giggling the whole time, as she continued to laugh Costia softly laughed out;_

_“Yay Lexi…you saved me again” The words struck both Clarke and Lexa, they weren’t meant in a serious way at all, they were completely playful and harmless but deep down they struck with Lexa most, the word again ringing in her mind meaning that Costia remembered all those times she protected the little girl from her drunken parents when they were fighting each other or someone else. Seeing the thoughts circling in Lexa’s head Clarke stood from the bed and walked over to her girlfriend gently placing a kiss on her cheek bringing her out of those thoughts. Lexa sent her a thankful smile, which was returned with a small nod from the blonde, who moved and sat back on the bed looking at the two brunettes she was about to ask when Raven would be back when Costia beat her too it “When is Rae Rae getting here Lexi?”_

_“She should be here any minute Cos, she said she was gonna run all the way back”_

_“Yaaaaayyyyy I missed her loads….And I wanna give her the biggest hugs ever”_

_“Bigger than the ones you gave her last time?”_

_“Yeh loads more bigger” Costia brightly smiled at her big sister, she was about to say something else when a massive bang and a crash sound came from downstairs the sounds making Lexa head turn on a swivel and look towards the door. She had a feeling she knew what and who it was and she wasn’t liking the possibility of her being right. Placing Costia on the ground she kneels in front of the little girl taking her hands seeing she was clearly scared she squeezed Costia’s hands gently as she looked into her eyes and spoke;_

_“Don’t be scared Cos, I’m not gonna let anything bad happen to you…you stay here with Clarke while I go see Auntie Anya is okay….Clarke will protect you just like I do I promise…”_

_“But am I safe?”_

_“Your really safe with Clarke, see she keeps me safe whenever we’re together and she’s gonna do the same for you okay?” Costia nodded her head sadly at her sister before moving forward and hugging her older sister tightly, pulling back after a few seconds Lexa softly spoke “Good girl, now run over to Clarke for me” She encouragingly smiled at her little sister watching a small unsure smile fill her face before she turned and ran as fast as she could to Clarke jumping onto the bed and into the blondes waiting arms. As Clarke held onto Costia she looked at Lexa mouthing a ‘be careful’ to her girlfriend who smiled winked and nodded before turning the the door pulling it open and walking down the stairs_

_Lexa closed the door firmly behind her letting her hand unclench the door handle as she took small steps forward until she was at the top of the stairs, the voices from downstairs clear for her to hear as she closed her eyes and summoned every ounce of energy she could find inside her. Opening her eyes, she took a breath before releasing it and walking down the stairs her face hiding any fear she may have been feeling at that moment. As she reached the living room she could instantly see broken glass on the floor and the coffee table had been turned over like someone had thrown it in a rage, she could see the signs of a small struggle. Looking around the room quickly she could still hear an argument coming from the next room. She was about to go into the kitchen and interject into whatever argument was ensuing in the kitchen, but before she could her attention was pulled to the sound of crying and snivelling coming from the corner of the room. Turning her attention to the corner of the room she slowly walked over to the corner the sounds were coming from, as she reached the corner of the couch she noticed there was a blanket covered over the where a small table was placed between the two couches in the room, slowly pulling the blanket from where it was she placed as she pulled the blanket back she could see someone crouched underneath the table. Kneeling down her eyes fell on her younger brother, TJ, crouched down underneath the table standing up she quickly removed the table from over him;_

_“Hey buddy it’s only me…..it’s only Lexi” She softly said, as the sentence left her lips she noticed her little brother’s body stop shaking slightly as he slowly began to lift his head up, as his eyes peered over his small knees he saw that his sister was the only one in the room. After seconds had passed by, he jumped up from his crouched position standing up he climbed over the couch to his right and jumped off crashing into his sister full force wrapping his arms around her tightly. Lexa soothingly rubbed circles on her younger brothers back trying her best to calm the little boy, before she had a chance to ask him what had happened and why he had been hiding the front door opened and Raven and Octavia walked into the chaos that was now the living room._

_As soon as she noticed the state of the room Raven released Octavia’s hand looking around the room her eyes falling on her sister and their frightened younger brother. Quickly walking over to them both she knelt beside Lexa gently stroking Tristan’s back as her and Lexa’s eyes connected and she asked;_

_“What happened?”_

_“No idea, I was upstairs with Cos and Clarke when I heard a bang and smash and came down to all of this”_

_“Where’s mom and Titus?”_

_“Titus wasn’t here and Mom I think is in the kitchen with Aunt Anya”_

_“Okay I’ll check it out” Raven let out standing up, she took two steps before Lexa grabbed her wrist forcing her to stop and turn around at the same time, looking at her twin questioningly “What Lex? I’ve got this”_

_“I know you do, but you know she won’t stay calm and you can keep TJ and Costia calmer than I can”_

_“You don’t have to keep protecting me Lex”_

_“Yes I do Rae….that’s the deal, you know it, I’m older so it’s my responsibility”_

_“Your only a minute older Alexa”_

_“That’s still 60 seconds older than you Raven” Seeing the look of annoyance on Ravens face she placed her hands on her sister’s cheeks looking into her eyes “I need you Rae….I need you to keep Costia and TJ safe….And I need you to protect Clarke as well….If things get crazy I need you to keep her safe…and more than that I trust you to keep them all safe, including Octavia as well…I know you’d never let anything happen to her or anyone else as long as you were there…”_

_“You promise you’ll be careful?”_

_“I twin promise Rae”_

_“Okay, I’ll take TJ upstairs but if your not there in twenty minutes lex….”_

_“It won’t take th….”_

_“Twenty Minutes Alexa and I’m coming back down here…”_

_“Okay twenty minutes max I promise”_

_“Good” Raven let out moving her sister’s hands and pulling her into a hug squeezing her as tightly as she could without hurting her, after a second or so she released her hold on Lexa and turned her attention to her little brother who was frowning heavily looking up at his older sisters. “Hey little man…I know everything is a little scary right now…” She softly said smiling brightly at her little brother, moving forward and kneeling down in front of him, taking his small hands in her own looking him in the eyes and making sure her smile never faltered. “Lexi is gonna go help Mommy…and me and you are going to go upstairs to play with Cos and Clarke….”_

_“And Tavia?” The little boy cutely asked as he looked up at his big sister, find courage in her smile._

_“Yep and Octavia too…so are you ready?”_

_“Yeh” TJ excitedly replied, his fear seeming to disappear at Raven’s words and smile. Excitedly jumping in the air a few times, he removed his hands from Raven’s launching himself forward wrapping his arms around his sister and hugging her tightly._

_“Come on then…how about we play snap….I bet I can beat you…”_

_“No….I’m gonna win”_

_Raven indulged her little brother in a small and joking argument as she lifted him up, carrying him up the stairs towards her and Lexa’s bedroom, Octavia softly smiled at Lexa before following her girlfriend upstairs. Watching the three of them walking up the stairs, she waited until they were out of sight and she’d heard the sound of the bedroom door closing before she took a deep breath in and turned her attention to the kitchen, releasing the deep breath before beginning to walk towards the kitchen._

_Step by step, she forced her body towards the kitchen until she was at the door, then forcing herself to walk through the door. She was meet with the image or her Aunt holding her mother against a wall, clearly restraining her stopping her from doing anymore damage than she’d already caused. Pushing down all the anger that instantly surfaced inside her she moved forward “I’ve got it from here Anya”. Hearing Lexa’s voice Anya turned around looking the teenager as she walked towards them, Anya’s grip loosened as Lexa stopped at the side of them both._

_“You shouldn’t have to deal with her in this state”_

_Lexa shook her head at her Aunt’s words as her mother slide down the wall she was previously being held against, clearly so intoxicated that standing was an impossible task at this moment in time. “But it was okay for me to deal with her for years before I came here right?”_

_“Lexa, we didn’t know she was this bad….we thought you were exaggerating”_

_“And that makes it okay somehow right?”_

_“No, not by any means….but I want to help now…let me…”_

_“You really don’t get it do you?” Lexa let out kneeling in front of her mother, smiling compassionately at her, as her mother looked up at her and smiled reaching up with her right hand and stroking her cheek as tears ran down her face as she looked up at her daughter, trying to speak, words that Lexa had heard all too many times ‘sorry’ a word that had little meaning to her whenever it came from her mother. Placing her arms underneath her mothers arms, just like she had done so many times before that she’d lost count, she lifted her mother off of the ground wrapping her arm around her waist so she didn’t lose her balance and fall to the floor again. As she went to manoeuvre her mother through the kitchen and to the couch in the living room, her aunt stopped her looking her in her eyes and asking;_

_“What don’t I get Lexa? Explain it to me”_

_“This is all because you wanted something you couldn’t have”_

_“What do you mean Lexa?”_

_“She was never this bad, no matter what my father says….she only got bad when she found you and my father having sex in Raven’s bed…when you decided that he meant more to you than your sister and your nieces…none of this would have happened if you’d been a true sister….and then to make things worse, he chose you as well….can you imagine what that does to a person, to have the only two people you love most, to have the two people that are meant to protect you and be there for you no matter what turn their backs on you because they couldn’t control their sexual urges and impulses enough to wait…..enough to be honest”_

_“Things weren’t that simple Lexa?”_

_“Yes they were…you loved him more than you cared and loved your sister….more than you loved me and Raven…you know I could never in a million years do that to Raven, I couldn’t betray my sister like that….and now you’ve done the damage you wanna help….now that it’s in front of you and you have no choice but to watch and to truly see it…you want to help….well its too late….the damage is already done and it isn’t getting better, especially now you and my father are married and living your perfect life….the perfect life you keep rubbing in her face…until you leave her alone she wont ever be better….so please right now…just leave her alone…”_

_“It wasn’t like that, me and your father never meant….”_

_“Never meant to hurt anyone yeah I’ve heard it all before…” Lexa paused as her mothers dead weight began to cause her grip to loosen as she held her up, readjusting her mother and her grip around her mother’s waist she held her against her a little more making her weight a little easier to manage “You and my father are both as pathetic as each other, and I want you to know the only reason I came and lived here was because of Raven…she needed me more than I needed to stay away…that’s what being a sister really is…being willing to do something you don’t want to because they need it more than you need not to do it….but I couldn’t expect you to get that…but you keep justifying your actions to yourself if it helps you sleep….now if you’ll excuse me I need to take care of my mom” Lexa finished not giving her aunt the option to keep talking, instead she looked down at her mom and softly said “It’s okay Ma…I’ve got you…” Holding onto her mother tightly so she didn’t fall, Lexa half carried and half dragged her mother into the living room step by step moving to the couch until she was close enough to place her mother on it. Once she’s laid her mother on the couch she walked back into the kitchen walking past her aunt who had tears covering her cheeks, tears that got no response or raise in emotion from Lexa as she retrieved a bowl from underneath the sink walking back to the living room until she knelt in front of her mother, placing the bowl on the floor in line with her mom’s head knowing exactly what was coming next, her body went into auto pilot as she found a blanket in the corner of the room, placing it over her mom to keep her warm whilst her body recovered from yet another abusive session of alcohol consumption._

_Turning herself around Lexa sat on the floor, her knees bent in front of her and her back pressed against the bottom of the couch, her mom’s drunken body laying behind her on the couch, the bowl to her right and her eyes focused on the wall in front of her. Minutes must have passed by when Lexa was brought out of her haze by the sound of wrenching, quickly and instinctively turning herself around so she was on her knees she held her mom’s hair back as the woman successfully empty the contents of her stomach into the bowl that had been expertly placed by Lexa. As the sound of vomiting quieting in the room Lexa could hear her mom trying to speak, ‘I’m sor…’ was all she would manage to get out before another spell of vomiting took over her body “Its okay Ma…I know your sorry…” Lexa robotically answered as she held her mom’s hair back making sure she didn’t get vomit in it. A minute passed by and her mom’s vomiting ceased as she rolled onto her back, the smell of the vomit filling the room as Lexa’s anger and frustration boiled to the surface. Standing up she took a breath in, making sure that the blanket was still covering her mom, seeing it was she took a deep breath in, she was about to lean down and pick up the bowl to empty it when she heard voices and the sound of footsteps descending the staircase that led to the living room._

_“Clarke, I told you just leave Lexa to it…”_

_“No I wanna check she’s okay, and I wont take no for an a….” Clarke’s words died in her throat as her eyes fell on Lexa and Raven’s mom laying on the couch, clearly drunk a bowl filled with vomit on the floor near her head, her eyes moved to Lexa, the brunette was clearly about to pick up the bowl and dispose of the vomit. As her eyes landed on Lexa she went to move forward a step stopping when she saw the shame quickly appear on her girlfriend’s face “Lex…”_

_Before Clarke could say another word Raven rushed past her, rushing to her sisters side looking her in the eyes she knew what was looking back at her. It was pure shame at Clarke having to see this side of their life, sure Lexa had told Clarke about their mums problems and all the bad things that they’d experienced but Clarke seeing it in person was another thing, it made her feel ashamed of her family and how different their mom was from everyone else’s. Placing her hands on her sister’s shoulders Raven turned herself and her sister until Lexa’s back was facing Clarke, moving her hands up to her sister’s cheeks holding them so they were looking at each other she could see the tears building in Lexa’s eyes, pulling her forward and into a hug she wrapped her arms around Lexa who instantly hugged her back, they held each other for a few minutes with the sound of their mom throwing up in the background ringing in both their ears. Minutes upon minutes passed before they both loosened their hold on each other removing themselves from the hug as they looked at each other, Raven looked at Lexa and softly smiled looking in her sister’s eyes as she spoke;_

_“You don’t have to do this anymore Lex….let me clean her up you go upstairs…”_

_“No Rae…and before you say it again, we’ll do this together….just like we do with everything else” Lexa smiled at his twin who was smiling back at her, gently pulling Raven forward she placed a gentle and loving kiss on the side of her head before releasing her and turning around both of their attention returning to their drunk mom. As they both looked to the bowl they were meet with the image of just the floor, both of them curious for a second before Clarke came back into the room holding the bowl their mom had thrown up in on her hands, stopping in her tracks she looked at them both;_

_“Sorry I just wanted to help, you’ve both done this for too long and I wanted to show you that neither of you need to be ashamed it’s not something either of us responsible for….so please don’t be ashamed or embarrassed at all,…I just wanted to show you both that your not alone anymore, it’s not just you two….you have me and Octavia now….” Clarke stopped herself speaking as she tried to gauge Lexa and Ravens reactions, she watched as Raven smiled at Lexa and walked forward taking the now empty bowl from Clarke’s hand smiling brightly at the blonde before moving back over to her mom checking she was okay as she placed the bowl back where it had been before. Clarkes eyes moved from Raven to Lexa as the brunette moved towards her, her expression was blank and Clarke had no idea if she was happy, sad or angry with her. As Lexa stopped about a foot in front of her she nervously spoke “I really just wanted to help Lex…I wasn’t trying to embarrass you or…” Clarke was cut off as Lexa’s lips connected with hers and the brunette pulled her close wrapping her arms around Clarke’s waist as the blonde instinctively kissed her back. Seconds passed by before they broke apart and Clarke looked at her girlfriend dumbfounded look covering her face as she looked at Lexa and breathlessly asked; “What was that for?”_

_Lexa could help the natural smile that graced her face as she lovingly looked at Clarke and replied “Thank you…sometimes I forget for a second just how amazing you are, and you just reminded me that I am the luckiest girl in the world” Lexa smiled leaning forward wrapping her arms around the blonde and holding onto her as Clarke wrapped her arms around the brunette returning the hug, as she thought about Lexa’s worlds. Both of them thinking about how lucky they were to have each other and neither one of them wanted to lose the other ever._

* * *

_**Lexa’s Hospital Room-13:32**_

Lexa had been hugging her little sister for minutes on end before she finally pulled back looking at her little sister expecting an explanation but instead getting nothing but a pout. Sending her a firm look Lexa told her little sister she needed to tell her everything before her parents arrived. Costia instantly opened up and began telling her older sister about all the trouble she’d been in at school because of people picking on her for having alcoholics for parents. She told Lexa how she got into so many fights that she stopped going to school because she was tired of fighting people and not being able to learn anything no matter how hard she tried to ignore them. She told Lexa how she told their mom and her dad but they just told her to ignore it, that she’d been wanting to run away for a long time because she thought nobody cared, how she begged her parents to let her talk to her and Raven but they refused to tell her where they lived or to give their numbers, she went on to tell Lexa how she snuck into their room when they were passed out and stole their phones going through them trying to find her sisters’ numbers but only finding old numbers that no longer worked when she tried calling them. Then she told Lexa how she heard from Raven telling them what had happened, how she thought it was a sigh that she was meant to run away and come visit her, because when things always got bad Lexa and Raven would look after her and protect and, and TJ as well. She told her older sister everything she had clearly been holding back, how she felt so unwanted by everyone in the world except her older sisters. As she finished tears ran down her cheeks and Lexa opened her arms again to her younger sister welcoming her into another hug letting her cry her heart out.

 

She wasn’t sure how long had passed by when her little sister looked up at her with sad eyes and a scared and sad pout covering her face, she listened as Costia cleared her throat and softly spoke;

 

“I don’t wanna go back there Lex”

 

“I know you don’t but you have to…I know it’s tough…”

 

“It’s got worse….Mom doesn’t drink as much as she used to but she still hates me”

 

“She doesn’t hate you Cos”

 

“She does, nothing I do is right….TJ is perfect in her eyes he’s never wrong or bad in her eyes…but me I do everything I’m told and I’m still wrong…I still get in trouble I hate it….I hate her”

 

“No, you don’t….” Costia looked at Lexa challengingly before Lexa half smirked and explained “You hate that she doesn’t see what pain she causes…. you hate that she loves drink more than she loves you….and that she can’t just stop…I know it’s hard Cos but I promise she loves you even though she never shows it…”

 

“I do hate her, she kept you and Rae away from us and whenever we ask about you she tells us that we don’t need to know…she blames you for everything but that’s not fair Lex you looked after her is when she didn’t…”

 

“I know Cos…she’s just upset that me and Rae chose to leave her…and she doesn’t want to accept her part but that’s okay because no matter what happens we’re family and nothing can keep us apart”

 

“You promise?”

 

Lexa smiled softly gently rubbing her sister’s back as she replied “I promise” Lexa smiled even more when she saw a small smile appear on her little sister’s face. Nether of them had a chance to say a word as one of Lexa’s favourite voices in the world filled the room;

 

“MAMA….” Olivia’s voice filled the room as her and Oscar ran into the room both of them giggling softly as they stopped seeing someone they didn’t know hugging their Mama, Oscar clasped his hands together seeing his Mama looking at him he smiled softly speaking

 

“We’re back Mama”

 

Lexa let out a small laugh as Costia wiped her eyes and removed herself from her arms. Lifting herself slightly but not enough to cause herself any pain she sat up a little allowing to see her twins a little better. “I can see that my prince…where is Mommy? And grandma and grandpa?”

 

“Mommy is talking to grandma and grandpa outside Mama” Oscar responded not taking his eyes off the stranger near his Mama’s bed.

 

“Okay” Seeing the curious look on her children’s faces as they looked at Costia again she softly explained to them “You guys remember when I told you I have a sister and a brother?”

 

“Yes, other than Auntie Rae you said Mama” Olivia sweetly replied unknowingly impressing her Mama with her memory

 

“I did…. well do you remember my other sisters name?”

 

“I do Mama”

 

“And what was it princess?”

 

“Costia”

 

“That’s right….and this is Costia” Lexa smiled pointing in Costia’s direction as her sister stood nervously next to her

 

“Is she our Auntie as well Mama?” Oscar asked stepping a little closer to his Mama, the bed and Costia

 

“Yes… she is your auntie Costia”

 

Both the twins let out a small gasp before looking at each other and smiling running over to Costia and hugging her legs as they giggled softly. Costia smiled at her sister more tears surfacing in her eyes at the love the twins were showing her, she managed to contain the tears as Olivia and Oscar looked up at her “Hi Auntie Costia” They said at the same time making Costia laugh and smile at the same time, kneeling down she looked at her niece and nephew taking in every detail she could, before she could respond to their hello the twins spoke again;

 

“I’m Oscar…”

 

“And I’m Olivia…. but Mama calls me princess”

 

“Yeah and Mama calls me Prince as well but not all the times”

 

Costia couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face at the two children “It is nice to finally meet you both, I’ve heard so much about you…”

 

“You have?” Olivia asked curiously

 

“Yeh I have…. your Mama talks about you all the time…she told me how you both love Disney movies and how The Jungle Book is your most favourite film in the whole world”

 

“IT IS” The twins responded jumping on the spot and smiling excitedly, as they excitedly looked at their auntie Oscar sweetly asked, “Did Mama tell you?”

 

“Yes, she did, and she’s told me so much about you both, that’s why I’m so happy to finally meet you both in person…. you guys look just like Mama and Mommy mixed together into complete cuteness…” The twins laughed at their Aunties funny words “But you have our family eyes…” Seeing the look of confusion on their faces she laughed explaining what she meant “You see all of the Woods family have green eyes…all of us…not a single person doesn’t have green eyes on our family, me, TJ, Rae and Your Mama…all of us…”

 

“Is that true Mama?” Olivia asked pushing herself up onto her tip toes trying to see her Mama a little better. When her Mama nodded her head at her, Olivia looked back to Costia and asked, “What else did Mama say Aunt Costia?” Costia and Lexa smiled at the little girls easy pronouncing of her Aunts name, Costia smiled as Olivia moved until she was right in front of her whilst Oscar moved closer to his Mama his eyes looking up at her as his Aunt responded to his sister.

 

“She’s told me everything about you, but I haven’t spoken to your Mama in a few months, so I might have missed some new stuff…how about I tell you everything Mama has told me and then you can tell me anything that Mama didn’t tell me or that I might have forgot…. does that sound like a good plan?”

 

Olivia rubbed her hands together and looked to her Mama her face showing she was slightly nervous, Lexa smiled at her daughter nodding her head softly as she smiled at her daughter, letting her know that it was okay and Costia wasn’t someone she should be scared of at all. Smiling at her Mama, Olivia turned around to Costia and looked up at her nodding her head before she sweetly spoke “We can sit on that chair Auntie Costia…you can sit on it and I can sit on your legs like I do with Auntie Rae….and with Mama and Mommy…” Olivia finished giggling as Costia smiled softly nodding her head and carefully lifted the her niece off the ground carrying her over to the chair in question sitting her niece on her lap carefully before she began telling her everything Lexa had told her about them.

 

In her hospital bed, Lexa sat watching her not so little sister and her daughter together seeing how easily Olivia took to her sister made a smile spread across her face. Watching the two of them for a second her attention went to her son, who was still stood next to her bed looking up at her with sad eyes and a sadder pout. She could see his hands were holding onto the lowered rail of the bed. As he looked down at his feet Lexa realised he must have wanted to cuddle with her but couldn’t work out how to get onto the bed without being lifted up by someone else. Smiling at her son she softly spoke, “You wanna get up here with Mama?” Oscar sadly nodded his head at his Mama “Why don’t you push that chair to Mama’s bed then carefully climb onto it, Mama will hold your hand and make sure that you don’t fall…. Think you can do that?”

 

“Yes Mama” Oscar excitedly let out jumping up and down on the spot as he continued “Can I mama? Cause I think I can Mama…. But don’t let go of my hand though Mama”

 

“Of course, you can and I won’t let go I promise….do you think that you can push that chair by yourself?” She softly asked her son looking over at the chair Abby had been sitting on before they went to the canteen. Oscar looked at her proudly standing up tall and nodding his head, turning and rushing around the bed to the chair in question grabbing hold of either side of the chair he pushed it along the floor until it was right next to his Mama’s bed. Looking up at her, he flashed a toothy grin at his Mama as she softly laughed forcing herself to stop laughing so she didn’t pop her stitches or open her wounds on her back and stomach. Slowly taking small breaths in and out she held her left hand in the air for her son, lowering it so she wasn’t in pain but also so that Oscar could reach her hand. As soon as his Mama was close enough Oscar reached up placing his left hand in his Mama’s hand grabbing and squeezing it as hard as he could in case he fell at any moment. Using his right hand he grabbed hold o the back of the chair, bending his knee onto the chair and using his hand on the back of the chair to pull and jump at the same time onto the chair, once both his knees where safely on the chair he tightened his grip on the back of the chair, at the same time tightening his grip on his Mama’s hand before he slowly stood himself up one foot at a time, once both his feet were firmly planted he looked at his Mama both nervously and proudly, smiling at her son Lexa softly spoke “Come on Oz, only a little further and we can cuddle….you can do it my prince” Oscar smiled brightly at his Mama, his smile the brightest she’d seen it in the last few hours. Without another word, Oscar moved his hand from the back of the chair to the bed gripping onto the bedding that covered his Mama’s body, using his Mama’s hand and his grip on the bedding material he quickly hopped up and forward climbing onto the edge of the bed with ease, quickly turning and sitting on his butt so he didn’t fall off as he looked at his Mama and proudly said;

 

“I did it Mama”

 

“I told you, you could do it baby boy…” Lexa proudly beamed down at Oscar as he leant forward hugging her gently knowing she still wasn’t better, wrapping her arms around her son gently she let a small breath of relief thankful her son hadn’t fallen from the chair. Looking down at Oscar, she could see him looking up at her smiling contently his small features fixed completely on his Mama’s as he opened his mouth to speak

 

“I love you Mama”

 

“I love you too baby…and I’m really proud of you…” Lexa responded placing a gentle and loving kiss on her son’s forehead wrapping her arms around him a little tighter. As she did she heard footsteps coming into the room, looking towards the door she smiled when she saw Clarke walking into the room “Hey” She smiled uncontrollably, even though Clarke responded with a smile of her own there was something missing from it, something that told Lexa that the blonde had something on her mind that she was sure about sharing. “You okay babe?” She asked curious as to whether there had been a development in Roan being caught.

 

“Yeah…I just found out something that might reduce your pride in our son” Before Lexa could respond to her, Clarke looked around the room for her daughter, her eyes falling on someone she hadn’t seen in years “Costia?” She shockingly let out, the young brunette looked up from her place on the chair with her niece smiling at the blonde carefully lifting her niece onto her chest before standing up and walking over to Clarke, the two women embracing each other lovingly after so many years, both being careful not to squeeze or squash Olivia. After a few minutes had passed by, Clarke pulled back releasing her sister in law from the embrace looking at the younger girl smiling she asked, “What are you doing here?”

 

“It’s a long story Clarke” Lexa interrupted, she knew how happy Clarke must be to see Costia, but she couldn’t stop the intrigue at Clarke’s comment about Oscar rising inside her. Looking directly at Clarke making sure the Blonde knew she wanted to know exactly what she meant as she asked, “What might reduce my pride exactly?”

 

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said that, you’ve only been awake for a few hours you don’t need to be worrying about all this…...it can wait” Clarke answered placing a gentle kiss on Olivia’s forehead before watching Costia take Olivia to sit down in the chair they were previously in. Walking forward she stopped next to the hospital bed, on Lexa’s right side taking her wife’s hand in both of hers, relishing in the moment as Lexa wrapped her hand gently and softly around both of hers as she looked up at Clarke smiling warmly.

 

“I’m hurt Clarke…. not dumb…. I know your trying to protect me, but I don’t need that. I need you to tell me what you were talking about, please?”

 

“It’s honestly nothing Lexa”

 

“Clarke”

 

Clarke looked down defeatedly at Lexa, she knew that the brunette wasn’t going to give up until she found out what she was talking about. And right now, she was kicking herself for even saying what she had, Lexa needed her rest, not to have to punish their son in a hospital after only just waking up. But she also knew it wasn’t right to keep anything from Lexa, not after she came so close to never being able to tell her anything ever again. Taking a small breath in, she gently exhaled holding onto Lexa’s hand a little tighter before she explained “I was talking to dad earlier and he made a comment about the twin’s misbehaving for the teachers, he wouldn’t tell me what it meant…but I found out anyway…”

 

“And what was it about? Have they been misbehaving?”

 

“Yes they have…and a lot worse…” Seeing the confused look on Lexa’s face Clarke continuing, seeing Oscar’s face fill with a guilty but at the same time stubborn look. “I decided to check my emails whilst the twins had a few minutes alone with you…I found out that I had an email from the nursery, Oscar has been suspended for two weeks and Olivia for one week…That’s not the worse part”

 

“Really? What is the worse part then?”

 

“Oscar was suspended for hitting Ms Cartwright in the face”

 

“WHAT?” Lexa let out visibly wincing as a result of her tensing her stomach muscles and trying to sit up straighter, within a second Clarke’s hand was on her chest holding her back, stopping her from moving forward at all

 

“Lexa calm down, you can’t make any sudden moves like that, the doctor already told you that…please I don’t want you to pop your stitches or make your injuries worse than they are”

 

Seeing the pure worry in Clarke’s eyes, Lexa closed her eyes calming herself as she brought her now free right hand up to rest on top of Clarke’s, exhaling she opened her eyes softly smiling at her wife; “Your right, I’m sorry...it was just the shock that’s all…I won’t move anymore…I promise” She finished squeezing Clarke’s hand softly. Clarke smiled thankfully at her, before looking to Oscar who was still wearing the same look on his face as he looked at his Mama and Mommy. Lexa turned her attention to their son, wetting her lips quickly she swallowed back the saliva in her mouth she kept her face as soft as possible, as she opened her mouth and asked him “Is that true Oscar? Did you hit your teacher?” Oscar guiltily nodded his head at his Mama, his hands nervously moving, one to his chest and the other to his chin/mouth. “Why did you hit Ms Cartwright?” She was shocked at first but now she looked at her son, she knew there had to be more to it than she or Clarke knew.

 

“It doesn’t matter why he hit her Lexa…. he hit her so first thing tomorrow I’m taking him to the school and he IS going to apologise to her”

 

“NO…. I’M NOT POLOGSING” Oscar loudly shouted, his small face now contorted and filled with anger as he looked at his Mommy and Mama, leaning up on his knees and straightening his back in anger.

 

“Oscar, don’t you dare speak to me like that” Clarke instantly snapped back looking at her son’s angry face and body language. She was slightly shocked at his response, Oscar was always so calm and very rarely got angry with anyone, not even Olivia when she would take his toys. He was more likely to get upset and cry than to get angry about something, so this was a massive shock to her.

 

“Clarke”

 

“Don’t Clarke me Lexa, he is going to apologise to his teacher whether he wants to or not…”

 

“NO MOMMY…Don’t shout at Oscar…” Olivia’s voice came from behind Clarke, turning around Clarke saw that Costia was physically holding Olivia on her lap, stopping the little girl from running over to protect her brother and stop their Mommy shouting at him.

 

“Olivia, stop struggling and sit there, Mommy is talking to Oscar right now…he did a bad thing, he needs to know that…”

 

“Clarke” Lexa interrupted seeing that Clarke was shocked and clearly upset at how their children were talking to her right now.

 

“WHAT LEXA?” Clarke snapped, the anger inside suddenly boiling over as it mixed with the upset of her children being so rude to her. Closing her eyes instantly, she opened them within a second looking at Lexa, bringing her free hand to cover her mouth she looked at her wife “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to shout at you”

 

“It’s fine Clarke, just take a breath okay?” Clarke nodded her head, taking a deep breath in holding it for a few seconds and then exhaling as tears began spilling down her cheeks as the emotions she was holding in bubbled over, wiping the tears from her cheeks she looked at her wife softly smiling “Better?” Clarke nodded her head softly. “Good…” Lexa smiled bringing the hand that was holding Clarke’s to her lips, placing a gentle kiss on her wife’s hand as it held onto hers tightly. Lowering them to her thigh she rested them there before she turned her attention Olivia, as her eyes landed on Olivia she could see her daughter was no longer fighting Costia, happy that issue was solved, she looked back to Oscar and softly spoke, her face remaining stern and firm as she looked at him, “Oscar, you can never ever talk to Mommy like that, you understand?” Oscar nodded his head softly, the anger seeming to disappear from his face, tears beginning to fill his eyes, his bottom lipped quivered softly as he looked at Clarke, before she had a chance to tell him to apologise, Oscar pushed himself up a little more on his knees looking at his Mommy as he cleared his throat and spoke, his voice shaking slightly as he did so;

 

“I’m sorry Mommy…I didn’t mean to shout at you…I just got angry…. I didn’t means it” Before he could speak further tears began to fall from his eyes and he softly began sobbing as he looked at his Mommy.

 

Reaching over Lexa’s legs, Clarke lifted her son over Lexa’s legs, so he was in front of her as soon as he was close enough to his Mommy, Oscar wrapped his arms around his Mommy sobbing softly into her chest as he buried his head in it. Clarke let him cry for a minute or two before she placed her hands under his arms lifting him backwards forcing him to break the hug and look at her. “You promise Mommy you won’t shout again?” Oscar nodded his head sniffling back more tears as he looked up at his Mommy with a sad frown on his face. “Okay, I forgive you baby” She softly responded removing one of her hands from under his arms, using it to wipe the tears from his cheeks. Once the tears were all gone, she removed both her arms seeing in the corner of her eye that Lexa had her eyes completely on their son, obviously still wanting to know why he would hit his teacher.

 

“Oscar, look at me now” Oscar obliged and looked to his Mama his cheeks slightly red from crying, seeing the firm and stern look on her face, he shuffled slightly turning so he was facing her, his attention fully on her. “Why did you hit your teacher?”

 

“I was protecting Olivia Mama”

 

“Protecting her how?”

 

“Teacher was being bad Mama, you’re not meant to be bad or mean Mama but she was”

 

“The teacher was mean to Olivia?” Oscar nodded his head firmly in confirmation as he looked at her “What was she saying that was mean or bad?”

 

“Not saying Mama…Doing?”

 

Lexa instantly felt the anger rise inside her, the thought of someone doing something bad to her daughter rising inside her, whilst at the same time her mind began to race a million miles per hour, there was an endless number of things that her son could be talking about. Even though deep down she didn’t want to ask, she knew as a good parent she had to ask her son “What was the teacher doing Oscar?”

 

“Trying to give Olivia strawberries Mama”

 

“Strawberries?” Lexa asked softly, looking at Clarke, relief covering their faces and filling their bodies as they looked at each other. Quickly looking back down to their son, seeing the upset on Oscar’s face she let her son continue talking. “Are you sure Oz?”

 

“I’m really sure Mama…. we all had strawberries with ice cream…but Livy didn’t eat them because she can’t Mama, cause if she does then she gets really sick…” Oscar paused looking between his Mommy and Mama he moved his left hand to grip his Mommy’s shirt while his right hand moved and rested on his Mama’s right thigh as he looked back to her. “Ms told Livy that she was a bad girl, and Livy said she wasn’t, but Ms got mad and said Livy would have to eat it otherwise she was in big big trouble, she grabbed Livy Mama”

 

“Grabbed her how?”

 

“By the arm”

 

“Show me how” When Oscar looked at her slightly scared, Lexa held her right arm in the air softly nodding and smiling at him before encouragingly saying “Its okay Oz, show me and Mommy”

 

Oscar looked again to both his Mommies, seeing them both smiling encouragingly at him he carefully reached forward grabbing his Mama’s forearm just like he’d seen his teacher do to his sister. As his hand firmly grabbed his Mama’s wrist he looked up at her nervously, seeing his Mama smiling down at him encouragingly he spoke “Olivia said No, Mommy said if someone says no you have to listen…. but she didn’t listen Mama, Mommy said that’s bad…”

 

“It is baby, very bad”

 

“Ms didn’t let go and Livy was saying no, and I got really angry because Livy started crying loads… and I shouted really loudly but she didn’t get off so I hitted her, I know it was bad Mama, but I wanted to protect Livy”

 

“Did you tell anyone why you hit your teacher?”

 

“Nu huh”

 

“Why not?”

 

“I wanted to tell you and Mommy first”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because Mama…. I always tell you first…cause your my Mama, and you always believe me”

 

“That’s because you promised me not to lie to me ever….didn’t you?”

 

“I did Mama” Oscar responded nodding his head as he released his grip on his Mama’s wrist not wanting to hurt her. Moving his hand to rest on her thigh he smiled up at her “I’m not supposed to lie to you or Mommy, it’s really bad”

 

“Its is baby….so tell me, are you lying to me now?”

 

“No Mama” Oscar responded moving onto his knees and removing his hand from his Mommy’s shirt, allowing him to move so he was more face on with his Mama, leaning forward a little he placed his left hand on his Mama’s right arm gently caressing it as he looked at her, letting her know that he wasn’t lying at all. “Do you lieve me Mama?”

 

“I believe you my prince”

 

Oscar smiled at his Mama leaning forward and gently hugging her, his arms wrapping his arms around her as much as he could do the way they were positioned on the bed. “Thank you, Mama,” Oscar softly whispering against his Mama his small hands gently gripping what material they could find.

 

Clarke watch her wife and sons interaction and smiled as she saw how content and pure happy Oscar looked hugging his Mama, it looked as if nothing else in the world mattered to him, that everything he know and every toy he loved could disappear and he wouldn’t care because he was with his Mama. As she looked on her thoughts were pulled to a small tugging coming from her left thigh, looking down she saw her daughter tugging on her jeans trying to gain her attention, as she looked down at her baby girl she smiled as Olivia spoke, tears brimming in the little girls eyes;

 

“I’m sorry I shouted Mommy…. I didn’t means to be mean to you”

 

Clarke smiled down at her daughter, the apology meaning a million times more than a 4-year-old could ever understand, and what meant more to her at this moment was that she didn't have to tell her daughter to apologise and neither did Lexa, Olivia had apologised on her own which meant a million times more to her. Smiling at her daughter she reached down lifting her daughter up in the air, Olivia instantly wrapped her arms around her Mommy's neck her legs wrapping around Clarke's waist as she leant against her Mommy's chest and hugged her tightly. “It’s okay baby” She softly whispered into her daughter’s hair as Olivia held onto her tightly.

 

“It’s not okay Mommy…I’m not supposed to shouted at you”

 

Clarke smiled into her daughter’s hair bringing her right hand up and running it slowly through her daughter’s hair, bringing her left hand up to the opposite side of her right hand, she brushed them both through Olivia’s hair before bringing her hands to the top of her hair, she pulled back softly, the action causing her daughter to look up at her with a small frown on her face. Smiling down at her daughter Clarke softly asked, “Are you sorry that you shouted at me?” Olivia nodded her head softly, pouting a little more it almost made Clarke laugh. “Are you gonna shout at me again?”

 

“No Mommy, never”

 

“And why did you shout at me?”

 

“Because you said Oscar was bad, but he was protecting me”

 

“I know he was”

 

“And I was trying to tell you is all Mommy”

 

“I know baby….did the teacher hurt your arm?”

 

Olivia nodded her head sadly at her Mommy “It really hurt Mommy”

 

“Oh my baby girl….let me see…” She asked looking down at the arm her daughter removed from around her neck and held in between them. She couldn’t see a bruise or anything that indicated a lot of damage, still she leant forward and placed a gentle kiss on her daughter wrist and forearm before returning to her daughter some what telling off. “So next time you want to tell me something to help your brother, are you going to shout at me?”

 

“No Mommy, I wont I promise…I just got a little angry”

 

“I think you got a lot angry, didn’t you?” Olivia nodded her head at her mommy, a small but sad pout covering her face. “So, are you going to get angry at Mommy again?” Olivia shook her head vigorously at her Mommy. “What are you going to do instead?”

 

“I’m gonna talk to you Mommy, and I won’t shout either”

 

“You won’t? Then what are you gonna do?”

 

“I’ll talk normal Mommy, I wont shout and I won’t get angry”

 

“Ok, you promise me?”

 

“I promise Mommy, I won’t get angry”

 

Clarke smiled at her daughter unable to stop the smile spreading as she heard her daughter’s word, she knew the 4-year-old meant every word she also knew if her daughter did go against those words it wouldn’t be because she didn’t love her Mommy enough. Clarke removed her hands from Olivia’s hair, lifting her daughter up onto her chest kissing her cheek softly. “I forgive you princess okay…”

 

“Are you sure Mommy?”

 

“I’m one hundred percent sure” Clarke smiled placing another kiss on Olivia’s cheek, looking on as her daughter’s face stayed unsure and slightly sad. “Come on princess, smile for Mommy” Clarke watched as Olivia shook her head, a soft smile almost appearing on her face. Laughing softly to herself she leant forward and began peppering kisses on her daughter’s cheek making Olivia burst into a fit of laughter, wriggling and giggling in her Mommy’s arms. After a minute or two passed by Clarke ceased her action looking down at Olivia and seeing the smile was now completely covering her daughter’s face. “Better now?” She asked, Olivia smiled brighter and nodded her head at her “Good no more being sad my most favouritest prettiest smartest princess in the whole world” Olivia let out a giggle and wrapped her arms around her Mommy’s neck, Clarke’s arms instantly wrapped around her daughter’s back as Olivia hugged her as tightly as she could. As Clarke looked over her daughter’s shoulder her eyes fell on Oscar and Lexa, Oscar was still carefully laying on his Mama’s chest, as she looked up Clarke’s eyes found Lexa’s, their eyes locking instantly as Lexa carefully moved her hand to rest on the outside of Clarke’s left thigh both of them sharing a smile as they enjoyed a moment with their twins. Suddenly they were both completely ready for the weeks to come, they knew those weeks weren’t going to be easy but they also knew that it was going to be worth because at the end of it all Lexa would be home soon and they could get back to normal.

  

* * *

 

** 11 Days Later-Friday 21st April 2017 **

** Lexa’s Hospital Room- 11:24am **

Clarke was laying against Lexa’s chest her wife’s arms carefully wrapped around her upper body, with Clarke’s right leg gently laying over Lexa’s legs. Since Lexa had woken up, the two had talked things through, Clarke told Lexa everything that she’d felt whilst her wife was unconscious, every emotion that she’d gone through over that time, Lexa listened as Clarke told her everything and anything that she’d felt, thought and done. How she’d sketched her a few times, as well as sketching Raven when the brunette would fall asleep sometimes. She told Lexa how scared she was that she was going to lose her, how she blamed herself for what happened and feared that Roan would come back. Lexa let Clarke finish before one sentence at a time she squashed every piece of blame that Clarke was feeling, before she soothed Clarke’s mind on every single thing that Clarke had told her about. Making sure that Clarke’s mind was at ease, she could visibly see her wife’s shoulders relax with her whole body, like a load had been lifted from her. Since their talk everything felt great between them, at times they would both get a little stressed with things, they’d talk things over and ease each other’s mind. Lexa’s main stress came from trying to move about day to day without feeling an insane explosion of pain in her abdomen. But when she’d get too stressed or down on herself she’d open up to Clarke, telling her wife all about her fears and worries, Clarke would let her talk and then ease Lexa’s mind by telling her that she just needed to get relax and give herself more time to heal. But as they days had gone by, they could both see the progress Lexa was making, the pain was decreasing, and her movement was becoming a lot easier, she was now able to walk, with some small assistance from Clarke, to the hospital canteen. It wasn’t where Lexa wanted to be, but it was better than not being able to walk anywhere like 11 days ago. And more than anything she was over the moon that she was able to wear jogging bottoms and a t-shirt, as soon as the doctor confirmed it wouldn’t be an issue, Lexa had given her a list of the clothes she wanted, and Clarke had happily brought them in for her the next morning. As soon as Clarke gave her the clothes, Lexa changed instantly changed into them feeling a little better just being in her own clothes. And when it came to walking around and being more mobile wearing her own clothes, clothes that covered her body completely, gave her a little more confidence, and that was something she needed, especially after she wasn’t able to stop her mother taking TJ and Costia back to Washington with them.

 

Two days after she’d woken up, Bellamy came to the hospital with Raven and Octavia, intent on giving Lexa an update and also getting her official statement for the case that would be placed against Roan once he was caught. Bellamy went on to ask Lexa if she knew anything about Roan or where he could be hiding. She answered all the questions the best she could, giving Bellamy every single detail that she could remember, every word that Roan said to her whilst they were in that studio together, Clarke held onto her hand squeezing it a little tighter everytime Lexa would describe something a little more graphically than she was prepared for. Repeating almost every single word that Roan had said to her exactly that same as he had said it to here. As she relived the moment she was nearly taken away from her wife, children and her family tears ran down her cheeks as the emotions she felt at that moment resurfaced, feeling as fresh and real as they were the first time. Forty minutes after Bellamy had entered the room Lexa finished giving her statement, he didn’t stay for much longer after that, instead he got a small update on Lexa's progress and how everyone was doing, just as Lexa was telling him about her progress in moving around his phone rang and he was called out to an incident in the area. They all quickly said their goodbyes and he left. Leaving the two women alone in the hospital room, both enjoying the peace before Raven came in for her daily visit to talk business with her sister, letting her listen to some tracks she'd worked on, though Clarke thought Lexa should be relaxing she could see the enjoyment on her wife’s face as she listened to the music Raven brought in and began compiling lyrics as she sat with Raven both sitting on the hospital bed getting completely lost in their work. Since Lexa had woken up she’d told Raven everything that had happened, and how Monroe was a part of Roan and Nia’s plan to get what they wanted, at first Raven was angry and wanted to storm out and find Monroe and make her pay, along with finding Nia and Roan, but once Lexa grabbed her wrist and forced her to look at her, the younger of the twin sisters calmed down, her and Lexa had a massive talk about everything and Raven left that night seeming a little lighter and calmer than when she’d first arrived. Since that day, Lexa and Raven would talk every day about Octavia and Zachary and although Raven hadn’t told them, both Clarke and Lexa were sure that things between Raven and Octavia were getting better by the day. And everytime the two women were in the room with Clarke and Lexa their actions just confirmed it, they would hold hands and look at each other for minutes on end before looking away, something they hadn’t done since Octavia confessed to Raven. Whatever was going on it seemed to be helping Raven, everytime she’d come to see Lexa she was happier and that was the only thing that Lexa cared about. Clarke would sit and watch them both writing music or just joking with each other and she could tell how much lighter the two of them were when they were together. The only other time she saw Lexa so carefree and relaxed was when the twins were visiting, other than those two times she always felt like Lexa was nervous or on edge as if she was waiting for something to happen, what that something was she had no idea, but she had a feeling it had something to do with Roan. But she decided not to ask, she knew that when Lexa was ready she’d talk. The days had flown by, and everyday Clarke noticed Lexa was a little more relaxed and a little less anxious, and every day it felt like they were more connected than the last.

 

And, Today Clarke had gotten to the hospital at 9:30 that morning after attending a meeting with Oscar and Olivia’s principal. She’d informed Mr Kane of everything that Oscar had told her and Lexa, and just as she and Lexa thought he told her he would look into it and contact her. He also told her that he would more than likely need to talk to Oscar and Olivia and hear their side of the story once he had investigated himself and spoken to the teacher. Once she got to the hospital she told Lexa everything, they talked about it for a little while before they agreed not to worry too much until they heard back from Mr Kane, they also agreed that no matter what happened they would stand up for their son and daughter, and also make sure that the teacher was pulled up for her actions, even if they needed to make a formal complaint of some form. The next conversation they fell into was Lexa’s progress over the last 11 days since she’d woken up, how much she'd improved and whether she'd be able to be home for the twins' birthday in two weeks time.

 

"Maybe we can ask the doctor what he thinks?" Clarke softly whispered not moving from her place against Lexa, shifting slightly to look up at Lexa's face.

 

"Already ahead of you babe.... he’s impressed with my progress but can’t promise me anything right now"

 

"But your healing fine, right?"

 

"As fine as can be expected I suppose, the skins still a little sensitive but the wound itself is healing and the fact I can move about without as much pain as before is apparently a sign that the muscles are healing as well" Lexa looked down at Clarke a smile still plastered on both their faces as they looked into each other’s eyes. “So hopefully all the positives will add up and I’ll be back home next week…”

 

“That would be amazing, the twins would be over the moon…”

 

“And you wouldn’t, no?” Lexa teased softly a smirk on her face as Clarke looked down at her unimpressed. Clarke gently slapped her on the arm laughing a little as sat herself up creating some space between them. Turning herself so she was sitting facing Lexa, Clarke responded with a smirk of her own;

 

“Of course, I would…I mean I’ll miss the tidiness and silence…oh and having a full fridge…you know the small things really…but I suppose having you laying next to me every night would be enough to make up for all those things…I suppose…”

 

“Please babe, we both know I’m the tidiest out of the both of us, and I’m quieter than you…you got me on the full fridge though…I eat a lot more than you…but I am definitely looking forward to being back in our bed, laying next to you or maybe doing other things”

 

Clarke pulled back slightly a smirk covering her face as she raised her eyebrow at her wife “Alexa Woods are you thinking dirty thoughts?”

 

“Always when your around”

 

“Oh yeah” Clarke asked smirking more, both her eyebrows raising up as Lexa nodded down at her, leaning up she smiled closing the gap between them until they were a mere inch away from each other’s face. Lexa smiled brightly before closing the space between their lips, not giving Clarke a chance to talk or pull away. Clarke smiled into the kiss pressing herself against Lexa’s chest a little more, still cautious not to hurt her wife. Within a minute or two, Lexa deepened the kiss making Clarke smile into the kiss a little more. Lexa’s hands rested gently on Clarke’s hips, staying there for minutes on end until the kiss deepened even more, then Lexa’s hands found their way from Clarke’s hips to her lower back, her fingertips edging closer to Clarke jeans waistband as they started to move slowly under the waistband Clarke broke the kiss pulling back so their was half an inch of space between her lips and Lexa’s, looking into her wife’s eyes she softly spoke “I think you need to cool down”

 

“I don’t think I do” Lexa whispered back, leaning forward capturing Clarke’s lips again, but again Clarke broke the kiss, laughing softly Lexa continued “Don’t worry we have a least twenty minutes until the Doc comes back”

 

“How would you know that?”

 

“I’m resourceful”

 

“Have you been taking notes, so we can have heavy make out sessions?”

 

“Well I was hoping for more than a heavy make out session” Lexa huskily let her right hand slipping underneath Clarke’s jeans and coming to rest on Clarke’s ass.

 

“Lexa” Clarke scolded reaching her hand backwards and pulling Lexa’s hand up, effectively removing it from underneath her jeans. “What if someone walks in?”

 

“Then they walk in”

 

“Because that wouldn’t be embarrassing at all, would it?”

 

“There’s nothing embarrassing in the fact that you still turn me on…and that I like to get to grips with your assets”

 

“My assets?”

 

“Yep…your smile…your eyes…” Lexa softly spoke leaning forward again trying to capture Clarke’s lips only for the blonde to pull back.

 

“You were so not talking about my eyes or my smile…” Clarke responded unable to stop a smile spreading across her face as she looked at Lexa. “But seeing as we’re on the subject…are you sure you’d be healthy enough to do more than make out?”

 

“I’m more than heathy enough to do more than make out Mrs Woods”

 

“Is that right, Mrs Woods?” Clarke asked leaning forward as Lexa nodded her head softly, she leant forward until her lips brushed against Lexa’s for a split second before she moved back, repositioning herself as she swing her right leg over both of Lexa’s legs, so she was straddling the brunette’s lower thighs, Lexa’s hand instantly moving to caress Clarkes thighs as the blonde took Lexa’s hands in her own, interlocking their fingers so their hands were palm to palm. “What exactly would you class as a heavy make out session?” Clarke wickedly smiled down at Lexa, biting the right corner of her bottom lip as she felt Lexa’s hands beginning to travel upward to her hips, almost as if she was urging Clarke to move closer.

 

“I’ll show it if you like” Lexa smirked back electing a small giggle from Clarke as the blonde leant forward. Their lips connected effortlessly as Clarke’s hand gently rested underneath Lexa’s breast, instinctively being careful not to land on Lexa’s still healing wounds on her abdomen. As Clarke’s hands rested gently in their place Lexa’s hands moved around to rest gently at the very top of the back of Clarke’s thighs, and just at the very bottom of Clarke’s ass her hands ever so slightly squeezing Clarke’s ass making the Blonde’s hips naturally roll forward against Lexa’s thighs causing them both to gasp slightly into the kiss. The continued kissing on for a minute or two before the sound of footsteps coming from the hallway made them reluctantly pull apart, Clarke quickly jumped off Lexa’s thighs climbing off the right hand side of the bed, quickly she moved over to Lexa’s bag in the corner looking for a mirror to check her lightly applied make up wasn’t ruined by her and Lexa’s make out session, as she did so she heard her wife talking in the background “When this nurse leaves we are continuing where we le….”

 

Clarke smirked at her wife’s sudden loose of words figuring that the nurse must have entered the room, “We’re continuing what exactly babe?” She asked placing the mirror back in the bag she’d found it in, after successfully checking her make up was still perfect as when she had applied it, smirking softly she turned around intending to fully tease her wife. But as she turned back she saw the exact reason Lexa had stopped talking standing in the doorway, every single word ceasing up and freezing in her throat, her vocal chords suddenly unable to form and actual sound as every single bit of anger she’d felt over the last month since Lexa was stabbed rose to the surface, her hands balling into fist as she looked at the person standing in front of her, her vocal chords finally forming one name “Nia…” Of all the people in the world that Clarke and expected to see standing in that doorway Nia was the least likely, beaten only by her brother. She was there when Lexa told Bellamy about what Roan had done, she heard Lexa describe Roan’s conversation with his sister in length she heard how this was all Nia’s plan to get Lexa and her to break up so she could have Lexa. She knew that none of the this would have happened if it was for the evil woman standing in front of her now, and as much as she wanted to remain came, a larger part of her wanted to beat the living hell out of Nia for all the pain she put Lexa and their children through. “What the HELL are you doing here?” Clarke angering let out moving forward stopped almost instantly by the sound of Lexa’s voice

 

“Clarke don’t”

 

“Please tell me you’re not going to defend her”

 

“Clarke…” Lexa softly said gaining Clarke’s attention looking over at her wife, Clarke saw Lexa’s left hand stretched out in the air towards her, the light hitting her wedding ring and glistening off it. Looking at her wife and looking into her eyes she could see the anger shining back at her. Reaching her hand up in the air she took Lexa’s hand in hers squeezing it softly she stepped forward, so she was at the side of Lexa’s bed, her eyes softening slightly as she looked at her wife realising this must have been a million times harder for Lexa than her. Both her hands came to rest on top of Lexa’s left hand hoping it would help her a little in controlling her anger. They both watched as Nia stood at the door not speaking, her face blank not giving off any emotions. “You heard Clarke, What the hell are you doing here?”

 

Nia looked at them both something flashing over her face that for a second Clarke thought was nervousness or perhaps remorse, but the look latest a second and no longer so Clarke pushed it aside, she wanted to know what Nia wanted and no look on that woman’s face was going to give her that. She watched closer as Nia took a few steps forward, placing her hands in her pockets almost as if she was trying to let them know she wasn’t intending to cause them any harm. “I wanted to come and apologise for my brother’s actions” Lexa squeezed Clarke’s hands letting her know to just let Nia keep talking for now. “He’s completely lost the plot, I didn’t know how crazy he’d become I swear…I didn’t think he would ever do something like this to you Lexa, I know you wont believe me but I didn’t think he was willing to kill you to be with Clarke, he’s always been a little unhinged but he’s never wanted to hurt someone to that degree…he was always the one out of us that would walk away from fights, he always hated violence ever since we were kids…I knew my brother was an idiot but I didn’t know he was a violent one…if I knew I would have stopped him…”

 

“So, your saying you had no part in any of it?” Lexa asked her eyes narrowing, as Clarke looked at her wife she could see the anger slowly seeping into the brunette’s features as she looked at Nia. Squeezing Lexa’s hands, a little tighter she listened to Nia continue her speech.

 

“Of course not, I heard that he called CPS..I would never ever let him do that Lexa, I know what you and Raven went through when you were younger I’d never want to put your kids through that…not in a million years…yes he told me….but only after he called them and made the complaint, I told him he was an idiot for doing it and that it was one step too far but he wouldn’t listen to me, he kept saying that Clarke was his…that she was the love of his life and he wouldn’t stop until she was with him…he had this deluded vision in his mind that him and Clarke were a couple over the last few months…I told him that it wasn’t like that, that Clarke was into women and that it was all in his mind… I told him that Clarke letting him be around was because she needed a friend, but he was convinced that it was because she was in love with him…” Nia paused looking at Clarke and Lexa’s faces trying to judge whether they were taking in what she was saying or not. “Lexa, you know me, we’ve known each since before you knew Clarke…we knew each other in DC…you know I would never do this to you…”

 

“So you didn’t know he was gonna stab me?”

 

“Hell no…I wouldn’t let him do that to you not in a million years…”

 

Lexa looked at Nia for a moment taking a minute to think, she took a breath and looked back to the dirty blonde, and spoke “That’s the only thing you’ve said today that I believe…”

 

“Lexa…”

 

“No Nia…don’t Lexa me…you think that I’m some kind of idiot, that for one second I’d believe anything your saying, that I’d believe nothing that happened was to do with you at all…you said it yourself your brother is an idiot, the only thing he’s ever done his whole life is listen to you…I do know you, and that’s why I know that he wasn’t the master mind behind all this, your brother isn’t smart enough to know how to avoid a security system, not like the one we have…he isn’t smart enough to follow me or to swoop in and help Clarke…he isn’t smart enough to make sure that Monroe and Octavia happen to be in your parents restaurant at the exact same time on the exact same day that you happen to be telling your friends about us ‘sleeping’ together…your brother isn’t smart enough to think of getting Monroe involved…he isn’t smart enough to plan something that long and winded…but you…you are…your that smart, that forethinking, that obsessive, conniving and vindictive…your smart enough and patient enough to get your brother and Monroe to do all the dirty work for you, you could easily pull all the strings until you got what you wanted…and we both know what you wanted…even though I don’t want you back, and I haven’t in years you still thought you could control my emotions and my future…what about my kids? Did you think about what this would do to them…did you think about what I want?”

 

“You don’t know what’s good for you Lexa” Nia responded her facial features changing as she looked at Lexa. The anger appearing in her face as she looked at Clarke “She changed you…you weren’t heartless when you were with me…what we had, it was the real deal, it was meant to be forever but as soon as you moved you changed completely…you didn’t answer my calls…and when you did you would tell me to leave you alone like we didn’t share a bond…like we didn’t have something special and that was all because of that bitch…” Nia let out her words getting louder as she spoke on, her finger coming up to point harshly in Clarke’s direction “She changed you, she made you hate me…and even when I moved for you it wasn’t enough, she still controlled you…and then she worked on my brother…he was innocent until she started using him for her own benefit…”

 

“Your brother was never innocent…and Clarke certainly didn’t use him for anything…”

 

“Yes she did…she used him to get her grades up…whenever she wanted a ride she’d ask him…whenever she wanted someone to talk to she used him…she knew exactly what she was doing and what he felt for her…” Nia continued moving closer and closer to the bed “She used my brother and when she found someone new to play with she threw him in the trash without a single thought for what he felt…I meant what I said I’m sorry for what Roan did to you but I’m NOT sorry for everything she went through…” Nia changed her line of sight looking directly at Clarke “I hope that you didn’t sleep for days on end…I hope you had nightmares so scary that they felt real, I hope that you felt every ounce of pain that you deserve…I hope that the thought of your wife dying turned your stomach inside out and drove you mad…I hope that you thought about ending it if she died…I don’t care about your life you don’t mean a damn thing to me…you never have and you never will, I don’t care about any pain I caused you, and I sure as hell don’t give a damn about your kids…”

 

“Watch your mouth” Lexa instinctively let out, her anger instantly bubbling to the surface as she listened to Nia’s harsh nasty words.

 

“No, I won’t…she didn’t watch hers when she first met me…what was it you called me? Oh yeah a deranged stalker… like I wasn’t the one that had her first…YOU STOLE HER FROM ME…Nobody every saw it my way though no they always sided with perfect Clarke….Niylah was right to sleep around behind your back and believe me you deserved what you felt…your poison Clarke, you’re the sole reason that Lexa is in that bed right now…because you weren’t even woman enough to believe your wife over your stupid best friend…you know what I thought of that plan a part of me…a small part thought there was no way you would believe Octavia over Lexa…but yet again you proved me right and you fell for it….you put all blondes to shame Clarke you really do…the thing I love the most was watching you with my brother, looking so heartbroken and lost…it always made my day…” Nia paused for a second her face scrunching up in anger, distain and disgust as she looked at Clarke. “If I was smart I would have told my brother to attack you…to hire someone and make them take a beating but no that wasn’t enough for me, I wanted you to suffer, so I told him to beat up Lexa and tell him you told him to do it but my stupid oath of a brother couldn’t never get anything right…he even messed up calling CPS…I should have stopped then but NOPE stupid me I gave my brother another chance…and then something changed and he snapped…My ONLY regret is Lexa getting hurt…”

 

“I don’t know what the hell your talking about Nia…Clarke never stole me from you or anyone….I’m not a piece of property that you can own…I’m a person with feelings…and I didn’t love you, I told you that, I told you I didn’t love and that I was moving away because I loved my sister and she needed me…”

 

“I know what you really meant Lexa…you can stop pretending…”

 

“Pretending? What are you talking about? I’m not pretending about anything”

 

“I know that you pretended not to love me, so that when you left I wouldn’t be heartbroken…you don’t have to lie anymore Lexa…Clarke will understand…”

 

“Have you completely lost your mind….I broke up with you because I didn’t love you, I knew you felt more for me than I did for you, and I knew I was moving so I broke up with you…it wasn’t because I was trying to spare your feelings, I didn’t give a damn about your feelings…I cared about my sister…”

 

“You can deny it all you like but I know that if she wasn’t such a loser you would have never broken up with me to move here to be closer to her…”

 

“Is that why you brought Monroe into this whole stupid idiotic, moronic and vile plan of yours?”

 

“Your sister is the sole reason you had to leave…the whole reason this thing began, she deserved every bit of pain I could cause her…and unfortunately for her I ran into Monroe and after some alcoholic persuasion she began telling me all about her woes and history with Raven…turns out she hates your sister almost as much as I do, in fact I think she might hate her more…she has this theory that if Raven hadn’t banned Octavia from being alone with her, then her and Octavia would have had some wild affair that ended with Octavia dumping Raven for her…you know she’s a little bit obsessed if you ask me…”

 

“You’re hardly coming across as sane right now Nia”

 

“I’m perfectly sane, I wanted you back and I’m getting you back…”

 

“No, you’re not Nia, I don’t know how many ways I have to say this but there is no us, there is no future us…there’s nothing…”

 

“I get it…she’s brainwashed you…”

 

“OH FOR GOD SAKE NIA….What do I have to say to get it into you, I don’t love you…Hell I don’t even like you, if anything I hate you, you tried to get my kids taken from me, you tried to ruin me and Clarke…you tried to ruin my life…and then your brother tried to take it completely…What EXACTLY do I have to say for you to get it?”

 

Lexa and Clarke watched as something in Nia’s face changed, the dirty blonde’s facial features changing, her eyebrows raising and twitching. Her eyes darkened, her lips formed into a smirk, her nose scrunched up and her body started shaking as a laugh took over her body, it was deep and dark, and sent chills up Clarke and Lexa’s spines as they watched the transformation in front of their eyes. Seconds passed by before Nia stopped laughing and slowly moved forward, “Now now now Lexa…that’s not very nice is it…I mean speaking to me like that when your not really in a position to defend yourself…” Nia started moving forward slowly and methodically towards Lexa and Clarke. Her eyes scanning from Clarke to Lexa and began again, before they settled on Lexa and an evil almost sadistic smile covered her lips, replacing the just as evil smirk that was there moments ago. “You know you got me there Lexa…I thought I’d be able to pull it off but fuck it…none of this was about getting you back, it was about revenge…one hundred percent revenge…even though I do actually care for you, Clarke isn’t the only one I wanted revenge against, nor was Raven…”

 

“Revenge for what exactly?” Clarke asked, holding onto Lexa’s hands resisting the temptation to slap Nia across the face, and beat the hell out of her for everything she put us through.

 

“Oh she speaks…” Nia let out another evil laugh before shaking her head and continuing, “See Clarke, this wasn’t about just you…I wanted to ruin Lexa’s life just like she ruined mine…”

 

“By breaking up with you? That’s a little extreme don’t you think, even for a mad woman”

 

“You know your not as stupid as you look Clarke, it’s not just about her breaking up with me Clarke….its about her ruining my life, I lost my friends, my family and everything I had because of her…she broke a promise to me, you promised she wouldn’t hurt me and she did…she’s a liar…and when I came here to this god forsaken place, you could have mended that fence, not my being with me but just being nice…but no not you Lexa, you let your little blonde dog rip into me, you let your sister attack me physically and emotionally, and you ruined my brother’s life…”

 

“Nothing your saying makes sense Nia, Lexa didn’t ruin your life…”

 

“She did, by not sticking to her word…but you see I got over it, I went years without thinking about her and then boom there she was again ruining my life one more time because once just wasn’t enough, but she had to do it again…”

 

“Okay, and how the hell did she do it again then Nia?”

 

“My brother was always an idiot, but he was back on track until he ran into you and Lexa again, you and him talked and caught up and he was instantly back to square one again, he got it into his head that he wanted to be with you again, Lexa didn’t mistreat him at all, even though we both know she didn’t like him, but now he wanted you and he went off the rails because he couldn’t have you….and who do you think it was that had to pull him back all the time, because you couldn’t just admit you two aren’t meant to be, I had to lose my life….I needed to get something from all this rubbish and I decided revenge on Raven…and getting you back was enough…”

 

“Literally nothing you said makes any sense Nia, you wanted revenge on Lexa but you wanted her back…we’re meant to believe that all of this was because Raven was mean to you and Lexa broke a promise…”

 

“I don’t give a god damn if you believe me or not, I could care less…the truth is I should have made sure that I got back with Lexa, and that I got what I wanted years ago, but I let my kindness rule me….never again…I should have made you all pay in high school but I was a child…foolish, weak and unbelievably hopeful that she’d see the light…but now I see it…I don’t need to make her love me, I just need to get the revenge and justice I should have gotten years ago…and I really didn’t mean for you to get hurt Lexa, but this whole thing has been a lot of fun for me…especially watching your sister fall apart the way she did….all for nothing…It was hilarious…”

 

Clarke held onto Lexa’s hands even tighter seeing Lexa go to physically move off the bed. She could see the anger in Lexa’s eyes and as much as Nia deserved it she didn’t want Lexa to reinjure herself. “Okay Nia, we’ve heard you out so you can leave now…”

 

“Leave…why would I leave Clarke, that means you won…I’m here to make sure that Lexa understands why I did it…”

 

Letting go of Lexa’s hand her straightening her body as her face filled with anger and she answered Nia “You know what I’m sick and tired of listening to your delusional bullshit, you and your brother are both psychopaths that deserve to be locked away for as long as humanly possible, the fact that you came here to try and explain yourself with riddles and complete rubbish just proves how insane you are…so get out before I call the police and get you sent to exactly where you deserve to be…"

 

Nia's face almost lit up at Clarke's words, a smirk spreading across her face as she reached the edge of Lexa's hospital bed, leaning against the metal frame to Lexa's right, she leant over Lexa looking deep into Clarke's eyes as she viciously spoke: “If you’re not carefully about how you speak to me Clarke, you’ll end up just like Lexa, you and your pathetic children”

 

Before Clarke had a chance to react to the vile comment Nia had made, Lexa sat up straight her hand flying to Nia's throat and gripping it tightly, Clarke looked at Lexa's face seeing only pure rage in her wife's face, the same rage Lexa had been holding in since Nia entered the room had seemingly erupted and took over the brunette. Looking at Nia's face she could see the dirty blonde was struggling to breath, both her hands holding onto Lexa's wrist trying to get her to release the grip. As much as she wanted Nia to suffer and get everything she deserved she didn’t want Lexa to hurt herself or even cause harm that would no doubt allow Nia to get her arrested.

 

“DON’T EVER THREATEN MY KIDS” Lexa angrily let out her whole arm visible contracting pushing her muscles against her skin, her veins squeezed between the both. Her eyes were completely tunnelled in on the dirty blonde that had moments ago threatened her children. All the rage boiling through her veins and into her eyes, her eyes turning a darker shade of green. A shade that had only ever coloured Lexa’s eyes a few times in her life. As she looked into the cold eyes of Nia, she could see that there was nothing but coldness looking back at her, and for some reason it made her ten times angrier. The anger causing her hand to contract and squeeze harder around Nia’s throat.

 

Clarke could only watch on in shock and some what satisfaction as Lexa’s hand tightened around Nia’s neck, as she looked at Nia’s face she could see the colour fading away, as the fear finally started to fill Nia’s face almost making her look somewhat human. The change in expression seemed to snap Clarke out of the shock she was stuck in, surging forward reaching over the bed and her wife’s legs, her hand pulling at Lexa’s right arm trying to get her to release her grip, “Lexa, let go of her…your hurt she couldn’t be doing this…” Clarke desperately pleaded with her wife, she knew what happened when Lexa lost control of her anger and she knew she had to try and get through to her wife, even though the idea of seeing Nia get choked to death was slightly appealing. As she pulled at Lexa’s arm, it didn’t budge one bit, the desperation seeped into her voice as she desperately asked “Please Lex, let her go she isn’t worth this”

 

The words fell flat as Lexa’s focus remained solely on Nia and her facial expressions, as the dirty blonde again began to slap her hands against Lexa’s wrists trying to get her to release her grip, mumbling a pathetic apology to get Lexa’s hand off her throat. Clarke tried to think of what to do but her mind was a blank, until she heard someone’s voice fill the room, “LEXA?” Looking in the direction of the voice, Clarke saw Raven stand in the doorway looking at her sister and the dirty blonde in complete shock, without thinking Clarke spoke;

 

“Raven, get her off her please”

 

Raven didn’t think about asking why she just surged forward, grabbing her sisters arm and trying to remove it from Nia’s throat, as she pulled on Lexa’s arm she felt the amount of strength her sister was using at that moment. Unable to remove Lexa’s arm she looked at Clarke, “What’s going on?” not waiting for an answer she looked back to Lexa’s arm continuing to pull at it as Clarke explained;

 

“Long story short she threatened the twins”

 

“FUCK” Raven let out, using all her strength not to punch Nia herself. Ignoring Nia’s clawing and motioning at her, Raven turned to her twin, looking at Lexa she spoke “Lex, you have to let go of her…Now” Lexa’s face only clenched more at her twin’s words. Turning her back to Nia, she removed her hands from her sisters arm, moving them sharply to Lexa’s face grabbing her face with her hands, using all her strength to force her sister’s head to turn and look at her, forcing their eyes to connect “Lex, this isn’t you…I know your angry and you should be, but this is just gonna end in disaster, please let her go before you cause some serious damage…” Lexa’s breathing slowed down slightly and her jawline clenched tightly, releasing and clenching over again and again “Lex…Look at me…” Raven let out, the tone of her voice, the almost desperation in her sisters voice seeming to break through the fog of anger “I know your angry and she deserves to be strangled to death for what she said, but I cant lose you Lex…they lock you away and I’ll lose you…Clarke will lose you, the twins will lose you…and you’ll lose them…and I know you don’t want that so let go NOW…” Raven watched as the anger seemed to dissolve in her twins eyes, taking the opportunity she turned back to face Nia, grabbing her sisters arm she gripped onto it pulling Lexa’s arm from Nia’s throat, this time successfully keeping a hold of her sisters arm she turned back to her seeing Lexa leaning up and forward she placed her hand on her sisters chest pushing against it stopping her from moving any further, as Nia leant forward coughing and gasping for breath.

 

Clarke watched as Nia gasped for oxygen for a few seconds before standing up and turning to look at Lexa, she saw the look of evil fill her eyes again this time she could see it was masking fear and relief. As Nia moved a step forward, Raven instinctively felt what Nia was doing and removed her hands from holding Lexa turning around she placed a firm hand on the dirty blondes’ chest and pushed her as hard as she could without causing any real damage. The push did as intended and sent Nia stumbling backwards towards the door creating some space between Lexa and Raven, and Nia. Once she regained her footing Nia looked at Raven and viciously said;

 

“Your gonna pay for that”

 

Raven’s face scrunched up in anger, looking back at Lexa giving her twin a look that told her to stay where she was, she looked back Nia, Raven looked Nia in the eyes and spoke “No she isn’t, what’s going to happen is your going to turn around and walk out of here before something seriously bad happens to you”

 

“Are you seriously threatening me Raven? I ruined your relationship without breaking a sweat, imagine what I could do if I actually put some effort into it…”

 

Raven’s facial expression hardened and her back turned completely to Lexa as she walked forward, her eyes filled with anger towards the dirty blonde that had ruined her and her sister’s lives, or at least had tried to ruin their lives. Her fist clenched by her side as she slowly moved forward. She watched as Nia smirked at her before holding her hands up. “I know when I’m not wanted” She smugly and amusingly said as she smirked at Raven. Turning around her head whiplashed back as she was met with the palm of Octavia’s right hand as it connected hard against her cheek. Raven couldn’t help but smile and laugh at her wife’s actions as she watched Nia react in complete shock to the slap. As Nia regained her composure she moved menacingly towards Octavia, instantly Raven grabbed her arm stopping her moving, turning her around so she was facing them again.

 

“Don’t even think about it, because Lexa will be the least of your worries” She firmly stated, letting go of Nia’s arm she added “If your smart you’ll walk away and tell Bellamy where your brother is…before I find out and get my hands on him” Nia didn’t respond she just smirked and turned herself towards the door, just as Octavia moved so she was just to Raven’s right, no longer in the doorway or blocking Nia’s exit path. Nia stopped herself turning as if she was about to speak again “Don’t think about it, keep walking…” Nia seemed to take the advice, taking a few steps forward before she stopped again, smirking she looked at Raven then to Octavia then to Lexa.

 

“You should watch your back Raven, or you’ll end up in a bed just like your sister…. if your lucky enough to survive”

 

Raven didn’t have a chance to respond verbally or physically as she instinctively knew her sister was moving behind her, turning around she stopped on the spot just in time to see Lexa attempting to get out of her hospital bed, all the threats that Nia was throwing her way obviously being too much for her to handle. Before Lexa’s foot could hit the ground, Raven lunged forward grabbing her sister as gently as she could by the hips, stopping her from moving any further and potentially causing herself any injuries. As Nia laughed and smirked at Lexa’s reaction to her words she muttered out a almost sadistic “So easy and worth every single minute…” Clearing her throat and smirking even wider she said “Enjoy your family while you can…” Turning around she was stopped in her tracks by Octavia who had moved herself at Nia’s latest comment, “What are you going to slap me again Octavia?”

 

“No, I’m not…” A smile spread across Octavia’s face as she looked over Nia’s face, peaking the dirty blonde’s interest as to what was behind her. “But she is…and something tells me it won’t be a slap…” Nia’s intrigue peaked, and she turned around as she turned she was met with a fist in the stomach, quickly and solidly followed up with punch to her jaw, sending her to the floor a cough erupting from her throat. Nia took a breath turning and struggling back to her feet, seeing a very angry looking Clarke standing about a foot away from her, her face scrunched in anger her fists still clenched tightly at her side. As Nia stood up she looked at Clarke, smirking before turning and walking out the door, walking as if she was a wounded animal retreating from its attempted prey.

 

The room remained silent as Clarke calmed herself down, her fist slowly unclenching as her breathing returned to normal. As she calmed down Lexa’s eyes remained on her completely a look of awe and shock covering her face as she slowly moved herself back into her bed. Raven looked from Clarke to her sister, then to her wife studying Octavia’s body, the way she was stood almost defensively her eyes scanning from the door of the room to the windows, looking through them obviously keeping an eye out for Nia, in case the psychotic dirty blonde decided to return to exact some sort of twisted revenge. As the twin’s sisters both looked at their wife’s in awe, shock, amazement and a whole bunch of other things, they both wet their lips, cleared their throats and spoke, unintentionally, at the same time;

 

“That was hot”

 

Raven and Lexa said at the same time, looking at each other laughing as Clarke and Octavia both let out a laugh in relief, their bodies visibly relaxing as they made their way over to their respective wives. Once they both reached them, they engulfed them in a hug, one that said they were both relieved and fearful of what had happened and what may come in the future. But an embrace that also told each other that no matter what happened, as long as they had each other they’d be okay.

  

* * *

 

3rd May 2017- The Twins 5th Birthday

Olivia and Oscar were waiting happily in the living room, waiting to open their presents, they’d woken up at 6am ready for their birthday but at the same time wanting the day to go on so they could go see their Mama in the hospital, over the weeks that followed Lexa waking up things had improved a massive amount, but not enough for the doctors to think Lexa was okay to come home, and as much as they missed their Mama being at home the twins seemed to be copying with it. Everyday in the morning they would video chat with their Mama, eating breakfast whilst their Mama did on their tablet and their Mommy sat beside them making sure the tablet didn’t fall over. They would tell her about what they were excited about that day, every single day the first thing they would say is they were excited the most about seeing their Mama after they finished at nursery. Today they seemed to be a little more eager to see their Mama than normal, Clarke placed it down to it being their birthday, even talking to Lexa on video chat only seemed to make them more anguish and eager to see their Mama. Luckily, she’d managed to convince them to get dressed and ready for their birthday party that afternoon. She ended up spending an hour going through the twins’ clothes until the found something they wanted to wear. To her surprise the twins had come across a set of t-shirts that Octavia and Raven had brought for the twins last year, t-shirts that must have been at Lexa’s apartment when she was living alone, because Clarke couldn’t ever remember coming across the t-shirts since the first time she saw them. Once the twins had decided what t-shirts they were wearing, the very quickly decided what jeans and underwear they wanted to wear.

 

Oscar had opted for a black t-shirt that had three words written on it in bold white lettering, a thin white lined box around each word, the words on the t-shirt read ‘Cool Like Mama’, along with the t-shirt Oscar had gone for a pair of light blue denim jeans, the jeans had a series of rips on the right leg from the middle of the thigh down over the knee and stopping at just after the knee. Along with his jeans he had decided to go with dinosaur boxers and socks. Olivia was dressed almost identically to her brother; her jeans were exactly the same only they had a small daisy on the left leg just under the pocket. Her t-shirt was the same design and make as Oscar’s but hers was light pink and had ‘Cool Like Mommy’ in bold white lettering, a thin white lined box around each word as well. Along with her jeans and t-shirt, Olivia had decided to wear Princess panties and socks. Once they were dressed the twin’s excitement at getting dressed quickly disappeared as they told Clarke they didn’t want to style their hair with their Mama, not arguing they headed downstairs and Clarke moved around the house finishing the final touches of the living room, kitchen and garden, the small things her, Raven and Octavia never got around to sorting the day before. She used every opportunity she had to get the twins to help her to try and stop them thinking about their Mama more than they were. Once she was finished with placing out the food (cakes, sandwiches, all that usual party food) she opened the back door making sure it was held open, so nobody broke it during the party.

 

Thankfully the twins didn’t have long to be upset or to think about their Mama, as ten minutes later the first guests arrived. After the first few guests the rest of the guest started to arrive quickly, the twins seemed to get a little more distracted with every arrival, and when Raven, Octavia and Zachary arrived the twins seemed to completely distract them as they both ran to their aunties and cousin, both of them switching between Raven and Octavia telling them all about what they'd done since they last saw them, whilst they spoke to Raven and Octavia, Zachary was sitting on Clarke's lap telling her about his week the best he could. Once he finished telling her everything he kissed her gently on the cheek, jumping down from her lap a running over to his cousins asking them to play with him. Oscar ad Olivia looked at each other and smiled brightly at him telling their aunties that they would be back later, before they happily ran off and started playing 'it' with their cousin. Seeing the twins playing happily with their cousin instantly made Clarke relax, she’d been messaging Lexa on occasion letting her know how the party was going, and so far she’d had to avoid mentioning the twins were sad a few times. She didn’t want to upset or stress her wife out at all especially considering she was still recovering from severe injuries.

 

Over the last month, Lexa had massively improved and was barely experiencing pain when she was moving around, sometimes she’d feel jolts of pain when she overexerted herself but mostly she was pain free. As well as physically Lexa was improving mentally as well, hours after Nia’s visit Bellamy arrested the dirty blonde after her followed her from her restaurant to an old house where she met with Roan, they discovered that it was in fact Nia and Roan’s parents’ house, it had been left to them both but neither wanted it and it had been left empty for years, even being left in their parents name. Once Nia and Roan were arrested, Roan started talking instantly letting the police know everything and anything they wanted, especially making sure they knew that Nia was the person leading the charge, the one telling him what to do, he also made sure that Monroe’s name was mention to the police and they knew she knew everything that was going on. Though nobody expected charges to be filed on Monroe, they were more than happy when she was charged with aiding and abetting a criminal act with intent. Roan was charged with attempted murder, aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, criminal harassment and intentionally evading arrest. Nia was charged with inciting a criminal act, aiding and abetting (a crime and criminal), assisting evasion of capture, aiding criminal harassment and aggravated assault. The final charge had come as a surprise to everyone, but Bellamy explained to them that Nia was implicate in Roan committing the crime and as a result they believed that Roan would not have committed the crime without Nia’s involvement, and had therefore charged her with the crime itself.

 

Thankfully, Nia hadn’t tried to press charges against Clarke, Octavia or Lexa for their physical outbursts when she came to the hospital, and the more Lexa thought about it the more she thought that maybe Nia wanted them to do much worse than they did to her, either way knowing that Nia and Roan were doing to prison made recovering a lot easier for her, she felt ten times lighter, like their wasn’t someone watching her every move. But now Lexa and Clarke both felt like they were able to move on, yes might have to go to court but right now, they knew that the future was bright, soon they would be home together, and they would be a family again, and they could look forward without a second thought. Today though Clarke wasn’t thinking about anything but the twins and Lexa, and at the moment she was hating having to avoid telling Lexa the twins were upset, but she knew her wife would just work herself up and that wasn’t something any of them needed, not on a day that was meant to be about celebrating the twins 5th birthday. Today was about celebrating 5 years since their family became complete. As her mind filled with moments of the twins’ lives over the last five years, she was stopped and brought from her thoughts when she caught sight of her daughter walking over to her. Smiling brightly at the now 5-year-old she noticed the sad look on Olivia’s face. As Olivia reached her she lifted her onto her lap, Olivia instantly held onto her chest hugging her gently almost draping herself against Clarke’s chest, brushing her daughters lose hair back she looked down at the side of her daughter’s face softly asking;

 

“What’s wrong princess?”

 

Olivia shifted slightly looking up at her Mommy as Clarke glanced towards Oscar seeing the little boy was still playing with his younger cousin. As she quickly looked back to Olivia her daughter softly spoke “I want Mama”

 

“I know baby, we’re gonna see Mama in a few hours”

 

“Can I stay with you until then?”

 

“Until you see Mama?” Olivia nodded her head at the question a sad pout on her face resembling one of Clarke’s own “Don’t you want to play with Oz and Zac?” Olivia shook her head “What about opening some of your presents?” Again, Olivia shook her head “What about Auntie Rae, don’t you wanna play with her?”

 

Olivia again shook her head this time a little more aggressively, her pout thickening as she firmly said “I don’t want to play, I want to see my Mama”

 

Clarke was stuck for what to say, but just when she was about to open her mouth and hope for the best, she noticed her Mom coming through the back door “Look Grandma is here…lets go say hello, shall we?” Olivia looked at her unsure before she softly nodded her head jumping down from her Mommy’s legs, quickly jogging over to her grandma who lifted her in the air hugging her tightly, placing a kiss on the side on her head before looking at her granddaughter and asking, “What’s wrong, Petal?”

 

“I miss my Mama, Grandma”

 

“You do?” Olivia pouted again nodding her head at her Grandma “Oh Petal, did you speak to her this morning?” Olivia nodded her head again still pouting “But you still miss her?” Olivia nodded her head at her Grandma “Oh Petal, how about when Grandpa gets here you tell him all about it and he can video call Mama for you maybe?”

 

Olivia wriggled down from her Grandma’s chest turning and looking to her Mommy, reaching up and holding her hand as she looked up at her and asked, “Can I Mommy?”

 

“Of course, you can baby girl” Clarke smiled running her hand through her daughter’s hair as Olivia smiled softly, wrapping her left arm around her Mommy’s right leg as she leant against it, her cheek gently resting against her Mommy’s thigh as her Mommy began talking to her Grandma “Why isn’t Dad here? I thought he had the day off?”

 

“He did, but some intern managed to cause a high alert, so he had to drive down to reset the system”

 

“Wasn’t anyone else free?”

 

“Unfortunately, your dad was the closest person to the site…he won’t be long, I believe he’s on his way back now”

 

“How did you get here then?”

 

“I can drive Clarke, as well as owning my own car” Abby laughed at the expression on her daughter’s face, her laugh instantly seemed to relax Clarke as the blonde laughed along looking down at her daughter whose face was half buried in her outer thigh as her arm stayed wrapped around her thigh completely. Clarke and Abby continued to stand where they were, Clarke quickly filled her mom in on everything that had happened today including the twins missing their Mama, the whole time Olivia stayed where she was. Ten minutes later Clarke smiled down at her daughter, as she did so she noticed Raven approaching them in the corner of her eye, as Raven reached her she said hello to Abby, sending a smile to Clarke before kneeling down and looking at her niece;

 

“Hey Livy Liv, wanna come play with me? …I’ve got a surprise for you…” Olivia peaked her head past her Mommy’s thigh slightly, obviously seeing her Auntie was making her second guess whether she wanted to play or stay with her Mommy and Grandma. “Mmmm, let me guess your missing Mama?” Olivia peaked her head out a little more and nodded her head at her Auntie Rae. “I think I can fix that…. here…” Olivia watched as Raven reached behind her removing her phone from her pocket, carefully turning it so that the screen was facing Olivia, before Clarke had a chance to question what was on the phone or to look at it herself, Olivia jumped forward instantly removing herself from her Mommy’s thigh as she jumped towards the screen loudly shouting;

 

“MAMA” Clarke laughed at the excitement and happiness in her daughter’s face, as she heard Oscar shouting ‘MAMA’ as he ran over to his sister stopping next to her, both of them laughing as they began talking to their Mama on Raven’s phone. “Hi Mama” They both smiled out as Clarke watched them walk with Raven to the stairs of the back porch, sitting down on the porch with their Auntie Rae they moved so Raven was holding the phone in front of them as the twins stood in front of them both. Clarke smiled brightly watching the twins and how happy they were. By time she refocused on the conversation she wasn’t sure how much she’d missed out on, but she guessed it was about two or three minutes.

 

“Your telling me you haven’t opened any presents today?”

 

“No, we’re waiting for you Mama” Olivia firmly said to her Mama, looking at her brother who sweetly added

 

“We always open our presents with you Mama…all the time…”

 

“I know you do…all the time…. but you could have opened them with Mommy and recorded it for me to see”

 

“No Mama…. that’s not the same”

 

“No, it’s not is it babies”

 

“No Mama” They twins laughed out at the same time, their attention not falling from the screen of their Aunties phone.

 

“So, I know why you didn’t open your presents but why are my prince and princess all messy haired today huh?”

 

“We missed you Mama…” Oscar started looking to his sister who nodded her head instantly, clasping her hands and continuing for him

 

“So, we didn’t want our hair done without you Mama…”

 

“Yeah because you fix our hair the bestest Mama” Oscar added on, him and Olivia sharing a giggle as they continued to talk with their Mama.

 

“Well I guess I’m gonna have to fix your hair myself, aren’t I?”

 

Clarke looked at the twins as confusion filled their faces as they looked at the screen, continuing to watch the twins, she became slightly confused herself as Oscar spoke;

 

“I can see me, Olivia and Rae Rae…where’d you go Mama?”

 

“Guess” The voice snapped Clarke out of her thoughts as she looked up to see Lexa walking slowly through the back door, she wanted to run over there and hug her wife, then slap her for not being in the hospital like she was supposed to do. But as she looked at the twins she realised they hadn’t realised their Mama was standing behind them yet. Instead of spoiling the moment but shouting at her wife, she decided to watch the twins and wait for them to realise.

 

“We can’t see you Mama” Olivia let out standing up looking at the screen and pouting. Oscar followed suit standing next to his sister. “Where are you Mama?” Oscar asked as they again as the screen went blank and the call closed only showing the skype app that Raven was using. Oscar and Olivia both pouted heavily as they sadly asked, “Where’d Mama go?”

 

“I’m right here” Lexa let out a massive smile on her face, as the twins finally realised that the voice was one hundred percent not coming from the phone. Their small heads snapped up to the porch where the voice came from. Massive smiles covered their faces as they saw their Mama standing on the porch in front of them, as they took of running as fast as they could, their small legs carrying them up the four steps, as they both cleared the last step the ran full force at their Mama, Lexa just managed to kneel down on the porch as they both crashed into her chest, their arms wrapping around her tightly as they both held on for dear life.

 

All the guests of the party slowly went back to talking amongst each other not wanting to interrupt the family’s special reunion. Lexa held onto her twins for at least ten minutes before she felt their grip loosen every so slightly, she gave them a few more minutes, she couldn’t imagine what they must have been feeling, she knew herself that she was ready to cry, but thankfully she was able to hold all her tears in, she didn’t want them to see her crying and think she was upset. Because she was anything but upset, she was so happy and grateful to be home that she couldn’t even express in words what she was feeling. A few minutes passed by and she gently pulled back looking down at the twins seeing smiles covering their faces she softly spoke;

 

“Happy now?”

 

“Yeah Mama, really really really happy…”

 

“This is the best prise ever Mama”

 

“The best surprise ever?” Lexa asked, getting a small and eager nod from the twins “Good, so your happy Mama is back home?” They both nodded their head before their faces fell for a second, seeing the look Lexa quickly asked, “What’s wrong?”

 

Oscar and Olivia looked at each other before Oscar quickly looked to his Mama and asked, “Are you staying Mama?”

 

“You mean do I have go back to the hospital?” They both nodded their head at the question “Yes I’m staying”

 

“Forever?” Olivia softly asked, looking up at her Mama, hope so clear in her and her brother’s eyes

 

“Forever and ever”

 

“YES” The twins let out jumping forward and hugging their Mama again tightly. As they pulled back they turned around and looked at their Mommy, who was now on the porch not far from them, running over to her they hugged her, as they pulled back Olivia asked, “Did you know about the prise Mommy?”

 

“No, I didn’t baby…. Mama and Auntie Rae hid it from me” Clarke let out, looking at them both completely unimpressed, as she looked at her wife, her father came walking through the back door, feeling his daughters eyes on him Jake stopped walking completely “I guess you were in on this as well?” Clarke watched as her father held his hands up walking across the porch and stopping next to Raven;

 

“I only did as I was asked….as a good Grandpa and Father in Law it was my duty….”

 

“Sure Dad”

 

“In my defence these two were the master minds” He added pointing to Lexa and Raven before giving his daughter his best smile.

 

“If you say so Dad…. you know what?” Clarke devilishly smiled looking down at her children “I think we need to get Mama, Auntie Rae and Grandpa back for not telling us the secret…. don’t you two?” Oscar and Olivia laughed loudly nodding their head at their Mommy. Clarke nodded her head kneeling down in front of them “So here’s the plan…you two tickle Grandpa and Auntie Rae….and I’ll get Mama…how’s that sound? …. Good”

 

“YEAH” The both let out jumping in the air slightly before laughing at their Mommy and waiting for her to tell them when to go.

 

“Ready….” Clarke let out watching as Raven and her dad played along pretending to be scared, both of them getting ready to run. “Annnndddd…. GO GO GO…” The twins took off running as did Raven and Jake, both of them letting the twins catch upto them before sprinting away again, the sound of the twin’s laughter filling the back garden as Clarke slowly walked over to her wife, who was now leaning on the wall near the back door. As she got closer to Lexa her wife held her hands up and spoke;

 

“In my defence I’m not able to run away so you got me trapped”

 

“Oh, I know…. that was the plan…” Clarke let out, stopping in front of her wife she felt Lexa’s hands come to rest on her waist, gently pulling her forward until Lexa’s arms were wrapped around her waist, pulling them close until she was leaning on Lexa’s hips, Clarke couldn’t help the smile that covered her face as she leant forward lovingly and gently connecting her lips to Lexa’s, she only let them stay connected for a few seconds before she pulled back, pushing against the wall to create some space between her and Lexa, seeing the smirk on her wife’s face she unamusingly looked at her shaking her head before she pushed hard against Lexa’s uninjured shoulder;

 

“OW…what was that for?”

 

“You know exactly what that was for?”

 

“Ok, in my defence, this wasn’t exactly a long drawn out plan”

 

“It wasn’t?”

 

“No, I’ve only known I’d be released toady for a week” Again Clarke pushed hard on Lexa’s uninjured shoulder again electing a ‘OW’ from Lexa “Hey…. okay okay I get it…”

 

“Do you Alexa…...do you really?”

 

“I do babe I swear…. But I have a good reason…” Seeing the look on Clarke’s face Lexa quickly spoke “I’ll explain just don’t hit me again…as sexy as you look it still hurts…”

 

“Flattery wont work…tell me this good reason…”

 

“You had enough on your plate to deal with Clarke…and I know that we agreed no secrets, but this is more a small white lie that a secret, when the doctors told me they said that it might change, it might be earlier or later…but they didn’t know….and then today after out video call they came by and said I could go home today as long as someone picked me up….”

 

“And you thought your father in law was a better option than your wife?”

 

“No…I called Raven, she was already on her way so then I asked your dad….it wasn’t about hiding anything I promise…I just wanted you and the twins to enjoy your day without worrying about me….I know how stressed you’ve been organising this, and I know I helped where I could but you pretty much did this all on your own…I didn’t want to add to it….and I honestly thought you deserved the surprise as well….”

 

“You wanted to surprise me as well?”

 

“Of course I did…You’ve been busting your amazingly perfect behind since I’ve been in hospital…you’d come see me everyday whilst still looking after the twins, taking them to school, making sure that situation got dealt with, as well as making sure all the utilities bills are paid on time, that the house is clean…and the whole time your doing all that, your painting, making sure the gallery is still thriving and organising events at your work…you’ve been so amazing and I thought you deserved to not worry about one more thing…”

 

“Your making it hard to stay mad at you”

 

“I’m sorry….”

 

“Don’t be…I’m really glad your home…” Clarke smiled out leaning forward, stopping short of Lexa’s lips, she looked into her wife’s eyes as Lexa tightened her arms around her waist “But no more hiding stuff from me…deal?”

 

“Deal” Lexa smiled closing the gap between her and Clarke’s lips. Both of them getting lost in the moment as they finally had what they’d been waiting months for, their family was finally complete again, Lexa was home and that was the best part of this day. The best part of the last few months, the months that had been hell for them all. From nights alone, wide awake in bed missing the others presence, to just missing being able to walk around the house knowing that all four of them were in the same house. It was the new beginning that they had been delayed, that they had been robbed off months ago by Roan, but now nothing could stop them, there was nothing and nobody that could get in the way of their family and their happiness. Lexa was home and that was all her and Clarke had ever wanted and needed. All they’d both been hoping for, for over a year and a half, they and their family were finally whole again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So as always please feel free to leave a comment or message me personally to let me know what you thought, good or bad, all I ask is you be respectful of the fact I am a human being and I have feelings, therefore please be constructive in your criticism :-) 
> 
> I will be posting a follow up of perhaps ten chapters to this story but it will be years later, and will include a few flashbacks to Clarke and Lexa's relationship as well as perhaps Raven and Octavia's and of course.
> 
> I'm also thinking about doing a Octaven FanFic on here but am undecided at present as would love a co author but still not decided at the moment...but if you have thoughts on that then please leave them in the comment as well :-)
> 
> ANYWAYS I Hope you ALL enjoyed this story and thank you for reading and supporting it :-) 
> 
> THANKS EVERYONE


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